I was hanging out, smoking crack and shooting dope with whom I thought was my best friend for the past 13 years last night. Well, he had consumed a considerable quantity of xanax bars (each bar is 2 milligrams) and started acting rather peculiar. To be kind, he was quite intoxicated and began appearing more than belligerent. I would say that it's very similar to sodium pentathol (spelling?) because I asked a simple question that I was not expecting to be answered with this truth. "Why did you tell me to call first?" He said " I wanted to make sure she(his mother) was not still there." I asked, totally non accusingly," Who wasn't still there?" Now, his reply made me start crying, I had to choke it back ...he said "Ashley". Then he started trying to back out of it, only not denying seeing her, rather denying having fucked her. He said that it sounded really awful if he were to have slept with her, cuz he immediately realized it was futile efforts to engage in denial when the words leapt from his lips. He knew it wasn't even worth the measly attempt. This try though, this meager bullshit, would also prove that he thinks I'm fucking stupid... Trying to convince me that he didn't do shit with her.I thought that he just tried that the original time? It all started to add up finally, mixing up into all the melancholic fears and self reassuring lies I kept saying to myself to convince me that I was being irrational...its all okay and I'm just crazy. Yeah, no, fuck no. She's literally tried to plant that in my mind. Its fucking ridiculous that she would do this to me. Treat the sweet guy like utter trash and make him believe that he is to blame for everything wrong with our relationship. Wow...whatta fuckin cunt wrapped in sadness. The fuct thing is I'm still here for her. Why!!!!!!!!!!! She fuct dude the other night, she's a sex addict... Point blank, period. She could've at least given me some good ass pussy and the best oral sex I've ever had in my life omg ...
