#specific learning disabilities

I myself have gotten comprehensive cognitive testing (part of adult reasessment) and my scores ranged from 21st-98th%, 5th-93rd%, and 2-16th% based on the category (WAIS4IQ, Academic, Adaptive functioning). this is a huge range and that huge range holds some useful information in the details. but even these are estimates based on limited tests despite their utility.

for example, the 5th grade math skills (which doesnt make sense because Im graduated) compared to >12th grade spelling and reading skills (which does makes sense because Im graduated) was simple clear evidence for a math SLD. the adaptive functioning scores were simple, clear evidence for why I should still be on disability (im autistic) and get other supports before going through my big stack of medical paperwork for details.

but for things like IQ my general score doesnt tell you anything meaningful. if you want to look at the individual cognitive skills it might be useful, but the average doesnt say anything except im "normal". your mental abilities can't be put into one number that's not how brains work.

Like I was given extra time, a study skills advisor and the chance to have my lectures read over my essay plans, these all helped and they are the reason I got as far as I did but I was still held back

Because what I would benefitted most from is having a person in my field not only teach me how to write essays but review the essays I was gonna submit and tell me how to improve, having flexible deadlines that I could discuss and agree with my assessors, lower expectations when it came to reading lists, better written secondary sources, a greater variety of assessment methods than essay, exam and participation in class (and more even weighting between the three) because none of these work for everyone and there has to be more creative ways to assess someone's capabilities than an essay and exams

And arguably the thing that I would have benefitted most from is doing my degree on a part time schedule whilst not having to work a job, which I am not sure was even an option at the Uni I choose, would have been limited in terms of who can afford that and comes with social stigma, but my degree was hard for me, my severe dyslexia meant there was a limit to how much I could be expected to read in one day and it was incredibly draining to keep up with the reading and writing expectations

But the teaching system is not set up to work like this, there is no way this level of support would have been possible under the current system and that means that there are many potential students who we are just outright failing because we don't offer this support

And as it turns out, I am dyscalculic. Officially. It's been a long, hard journey of mental distress, anxiety and hopelessness, but I can finally place a word to my struggles with numbers and "basic" every day maths skills. I never wanted to avoid situations that might be difficult for me - I simply wanted some more help, but always felt guilty or too scared because of the stigma surrounding mental health and learning differences.

There is power in me finally admitting that, I am disabled. I have a disability. I am dyscalculic. It will still take a lot of work in terms of self acceptance and learning to be okay with my limitations, but I'm getting there.

Full day of testing for H today. Really hoping this gives us some answers in terms of academics. Dyslexia? Dysgraphia? ADHD? None of the above?

It pays to be honest.

It pays to tell employers and those taking you on for any kind of work (paid or voluntary) about your disabilities and limitations so that they can figure out how best to support you. Now I more or less have an actual diagnosis and feel that I can put a word to my struggles rather than just awkwardly trying to get someone to believe me when I tell them that I struggle with numbers.