Take back the night 2017
So I went to a Take back the night speak out tonight. I did not intend to speak but I did. My speech was short and all over the place so I decided to write out what I Ā really wanted to say and maybe next year I will get up and tell my story the way I should have.Ā
āYou know you're life is fucked when being mentally abused makes you realize you've been emotionally abused and sexually harassed by a whole other person. The school bus seems like an innocent place but for me it was anything but. From 8th grade through 10th grade I was in love with this boy. He made me feel amazing but in reality his actions were extremely demeaning. He would play "games" that involved him inappropriately touching me, and at some points he would even throw change down my shirt for sport. I went along with this and just laughed it off because Ā in between it all he made me feel like the brightest star in the sky. I should mention that I wasn't dating him and never have. Then during my junior my friend was going through a lot and he needed help. I started to try and realized then he needed professional help but he started to threaten suicide at any mention of getting him help. I finally realized that having him use this threat against me is wrong and emotionally abusive. It made me feel small and unable to do anything. Realizing this helped me realize that I had been sexually harassed. This boy that harassed me made me feel awful about myself and made me feel that this harassment wasĀ ā loveā. I sit here now thinking I should have told him ānoā and told someone and explained what was going on because my friendās younger sister who I've know since she was 3 was then also abused by this boy and I feel responsible. I feel ashamed about letting them both take such advantage of me and cause me such pain. It is not right that I should feel guilty about any of this but I did and I do. Ā But it is alright that I don't let them make me feel small and guilty because I didn't do anything wrong; they did. Being silent won't stop this; speaking up is the only way for take back the night to be silent.ā














