#soft jaskier

“What are you writing?” Jaskier asked once. “Another one of your boring bestiaries?”

“Boring bestiaries save lives.” Geralt looked down, putting down the quill. “And no, it’s not a bestiary.”

“What is it then?”

Jaskier remembered all Geralt’s notebooks: the green ones titled Herbs, the brown ones with Monsters and Locations written across the first page. He didn’t recognize the red one. A secret book, then. It only made him more curious.

“Nothing,” Geralt answers, putting the book down to join Jaskier in the nest of tangled sheets. “Just…thoughts.”

“Thoughts about me?” Jaskier asked cheekily. “Love thoughts?”

“Hmm.”

At the time, Jaskier teased but did not pry. Geralt rarely gets to keep things for himself, and Jaskier delighted in the fact that Geralt could find comfort in keeping a journal.

Now, as the notebook lays open on the ground, Jaskier finds his name all over it. He picks it up and flips to the first page, and finds the title. It’s just one word, one name.

Jaskier.

A book written in his name. A book he never gets to read.

When he flips another page, the entries begin with lists of food. Fruits, pastries and wines, followed by stores to buy the best of them in Ard Carraigh. The combination rings a bell, reminding him of a surprise picnic a while ago. He marveled at how Geralt could gather such a feast without him knowing, and only got an absent hum as reply.

The next page records another date of theirs, detailing Geralt’s careful preparations even though the words are scribbled and crossed out at times.

There are other things. Thoughts.

Thoughts of love, of regret and hope, pride and fear. These are thoughts of Jaskier and their future.

He read slowly as if holding Geralt’s heart between his hands, skipping some passages when the emotions grow too tender, making him ache at the self-doubt that bleeds through these pages.

He has no reason to stay. Jaskier reads on, his heart breaking. And yet he does. I don’t know how to deserve him. I don’t know if I ever will.

The notebook isn’t completed yet, and the last entry consists of the names of many towns and cities. It’s the planning of their next journey, Jaskier realizes, following the route they will travel and diverting for all the local festivals. A coastal village in Cidaris is underscored twice. Jaskier vaguely remembers mentioning its name years ago on a hot sunny afternoon. He went on about how nice the water was there, and how he dreamed of going back. It’s the same place he thought about when asking Geralt to run away with him during that dragon hunt.

Geralt wants to take him there now, after all these years.

Jaskier closes the book with a shuddering breath and puts it back into the pack. Guilt churns in his stomach for having gotten a glimpse of something he shouldn’t have.

When Geralt returns, Jaskier has tidied up the mess. He puts on a smile and hugs his witcher close. Tears prickle his eyes still, and the attempt to hide them fails spectacularly.

“Hey,” Geralt says, confused. “What happened?”

“Nothing.” Jaskier’s voice breaks, and leans into the strong hands running up and down his back. “I just…love you.”

Geralt lets out a quiet oh and brings Jaskier flush against him. Even without looking, Jaskier can picture perfectly the slightly panicked frown on Geralt’s face.

“You’re upset.” Geralt murmurs gently. “Shh, it’s alright.”

“It is.” Jaskier sniffs. “You are here.”

That earns him an amused huff. Geralt continues, “you know, I just had this idea. How about we go to the coast? I heard Cidaris is nice in the summer. It’s on our way north, and it could…cheer you up?”

Geralt is so tentative, the nervousness thrumming under a thin layer of nonchalance, and Jaskier nods.

“It’s a nice thought.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Jaskier pulls away to meet Geralt’s gaze, and this time, his smile is genuine. “I’ve wanted to see the coast for a long time.”

The subtle pride at the corners of Geralt’s lips is more beautiful than the sunrise at sea.

Jaskier doesn’t mention the notebook of unsaid things. It’s a book that holds all the soft parts of Geralt’s clumsy heart, and of course it’s something Jaskier will protect.

He’ll protect the quiet love Geralt bestows on him by tucking the book away in the corner of his heart. He’ll let Geralt try, and try, and try.

‘Ah yes... It happened once you stepped into the room.’ You were wearing men's clothes sitting at a table in the tavern he was playing in. Your (H/L) (H/C) was matted with mud and guts. You looked tough but smiled and clapped along to his song. Your (E/C) eyes were light with joy. He got lost in them. His playing paused and the tavern murmured in confusion. He realized his silence and came up with a new song. He began to serenade you that night. As well as every following night of your stay there. He hadn’t looked at a woman since. So maybe the coin was less now that he didn’t speak of his escapades with the likes of royal women. He didn’t care. He spent his nights writing poems of all kinds. Describing the best parts of you. From your eyes, to your smile, to your bosom -He would keep that one for himself-. When time came for you to leave the town you were currently in he was overcome with sadness. ‘This isn’t how I am!’ He thinks to himself. ‘I am a confident and suave man!’ 

So with this in mind he approached you as you mounted your horse. “My dear lady!” He announces. “Yes Bard?” You ask with a smile. “I wish to offer my services to you!” He exclaims. “I wish to be at your side in times of need! I wish to serenade you with song for your ears only!” He walks up to your horse taking your hand from your reins. “I wish to be your faithful companion and friend!” He says and backs up a few steps. “And I wish to court you properly!” He says and bows to you. “Will you please indulge in my request!” He says. He doesn’t lift his head until he hears you dismount your horse. He looks up from his bowing position. “I know you are one for theatrics Bard but you do not need to bow to me in order to gain my favor.” You say as your voice echoes in his ears. “As for your request I must ask one question.” Jaskier stands to his full height looking down at you. “Yes my lady?” He asks. His heart feels like it is racing a million miles a minute. “May I ask your name?” Jaskier suddenly blushes. All this time he has been serenading you and he hasn’t told you his name. He doesn’t even know your name! “I-It’s Jaskier! W-Well it’s  Julian Alfred Pankratz but I much rather refer Jaskier.” He says looking at you with nothing but admiration. “I will be glad for you to join me Jaskier.” You say with a small smile as you lean up and kiss his cheek. Jaskiers face can’t seem to get any redder then it is now. He sees you mount your horse again. He places a hand on his cheek. “I wish to leave while the sun is still in the sky My Dear Bard!” You say with a giggle. “O-Oh yes! Right!” Jaskier says and quickly falls in step with the slow pace of your horse.

That was a few years ago. Here you are now in a small cottage outside of a small farm town. You were in your small garden picking berries and other small edible herbs. You feel hands finding themselves on your swelled waist. “My lady must you work so much?” You hear you Bard from behind you. “My love. You know I must! I need to make the jellies and take them to the market tomorrow!” You say with a giggle. “I am sure our little lute must be tired!” Jaskier says twirling you around and pulling you flush against him. “Why must you continue calling our child a ‘lute?’ We are not naming them after your instrument!” You say with a giggle. “I can’t hear you! You’re eyes are beautiful my dear!” You sigh as you both press your foreheads together. “You see with your eyes. You hear with your ears my love.” You say with a giggle. Jaskier begins to sway gently back and forth. One hand holding your left and the other on the small of your back. Jaskier brings your left hand to his lips and kissing the ring that resides there. “If only I had the artistic ability to paint. I would fill the world with portraits of you.” Jaskier says kissing your forehead. “My Julian... Your words paint the air with your song. I don’t need the whole continent knowing my name. As long as I know that I am yours that will be enough!” You say and cup his cheek. Jaskier leads you to the center of the back garden and sits down placing you between his legs as you recline back into his chest. Jaskier’s hands reach forward and cup your swollen belly. “How can I possibly be here with you right now?” He asks himself. “What do you mean?” You ask. “I am with the most beautiful woman on the continent with an equally beautiful child on the way.” You smiles and look up at him. “I have no idea. I was covered in guts and grime when you first saw me. I have no idea how you found that appealing enough to court me let alone marry me.” You say looking down at your ring. Jaskier places his ringed hand over yours. “Do you wish to know a secret?” He asks and you nod.  “I knew from the beginning of our courtship that I was going to marry you.” He says. “Maybe even before then.” He says with a chuckle. “How could you have possibly known I would say yes?” You ask. “How could I not!” He asks in fake shock. “It was written in the stars! You cannot deny destiny and you were mine!” He says and tickles your sides. You burst into a flurry of giggles. “I feel as if I have never known love until I met you.” You say as the laughter dies down.  

“Shh,” Geralt holds a finger to his lips. Jaskier goes quiet beside him, the only noise now is the out-of-rhythm beating of their hearts. After a moment the rose begins to bloom. A small head pokes out first, then two arms and a pair of bright purple-tinged butterfly wings. “It’s a boy!”

“How can you tell?” Jaskier asks. From what he could see, the tiny humanoid figure was neither boy nor girl. The fairy had short, cropped red hair and lovely large wings and not much else to go by. 

“His wings are mauve, see? Boy fairies have mauve wings and girls have white wings and those who are neither or both are blue.”

“You know an awful lot about fairies, dear heart,” Jaskier’s grin grows. He crowds closer against Geralt’s side and pouts up at his Witcher. “Tell me more?”

Geralt flushes his own shade of mauve and Jaskier delights in it, utterly captivated. “Do you really want to know?”

“Of course!” 

The tiny thing before them is slowly pulling the petals from his rosy nest to build a shirt and trousers, sticking the pieces together with sap and dusting it over with pollen. 

“Every time a child laughs for the first time, that laugh goes skipping out into the world and becomes a fairy. The laugh becomes a flower and from that flower climbs a tiny person that already knows how to fly.”

“Are fairies good or evil?”

“They’re so small that they can only feel one thing at a time, so I suppose the answer to your question lies in the hands of whatever any given fairy is feeling that day.”

“Huh,” Jaskier leans his head against Geralt’s shoulder. They sit in the dirt for a long while, watching the newborn fairy gather up his courage and burst into anxious flight for the first time. They cheer him on, watching with bated breath as he finally disappears over the tree line. 

The sun is close to setting by then and Jaskier finds himself shivering lightly in the chill of early spring. Geralt settles his cloak over the bard’s shoulders and gets busy scouting for a good place to rest. He pretends not to notice the way Jaskier buries his nose in the neckline of the cloak and breathes in, his eyelids close and his face blooms into an expression of utmost fondness.

His white hair laid messily around his head, looking almost transparent by the sun shining upon them and creating a halo.

He was regarding the bard tenderly and unguarded, as if he was the single most precious thing in the world.

Once he noticed that Jaskier was awake, he gave him a soft smile and brought his hand up to caress the younger man’s cheek, his thumb making its way from the bard’s cheekbone to his jaw and back in a repeated motion.

“Good morning.” He said in his gravelly voice, its tone even deeper than usual with sleep.

Jaskier smiled back and laid his own hand over the witcher’s, twisting his head so that he could give his palm a lingering kiss. “A good morning indeed.”

Geralt chuckled quietly and moved closer to the bard, to the point where their noses were almost touching and Jaskier had a hard time looking at him without going cross-eyed. Nevertheless, he was weak to do anything other than bask in the close proximity.

“How long have you been up dear heart?”

The witcher shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe an hour.”

The bard blinked dramatically. “And you just spent all this time watching me sleep?”

“Pretty much.”

“You do realize how creepy that sounds right?”

Geralt scoffed. “You love it.”

Jaskier rolled his eyes but then grinned sheepishly. “I do”

He moved their joined hands from his face to the narrow space between them. “As I love you.”

He gave his lover’s hand a little squeeze, marveling at the intimacy of the act, as simple as it may be.

They may have been laying in the same bed but that’s something they’ve had to do countless times in the past because of necessity. Even cuddling was common in cold winter nights as a desperate attempt to keep each other warm.

But hand-holding? That was never something he was allowed to do casually before, when he was struggling to keep his overflowing feelings towards his best friend a secret in fear of rejection. He had long resigned himself to a lifetime of dealing with this unrequited love and could have never possibly imagined that said best friend had similar feelings for him, so now that they were finally together, it almost felt like-

“It feels like a dream.” Geralt said, disturbing while also simultaneously continuing the bard’s train of thought.

“What does?” Jaskier asked, because although he understood, he always tried to prompt his lover to express his emotions, since the witcher had been told time and time again by the world that he was void of them, to the point where Geralt had almost started to believe it himself.

“This. Us. Everything.” The witcher frowned as he struggled with his words for a moment but Jaskier remained patient. “The fact that we’re both here in Kaer Morhen together, the fact that you’re safe and sound in my arms, the fact that the war is over and we have nothing left to worry about.”

He leaned up and kissed the bard on the forehead. “The fact that you love me back.” He whispered in amazement.

Jaskier let out a shuddering breath and gulped. “I feel the same darling. It’s hard to believe that after spending all that time in the middle of a storm, we finally get to enjoy the rainbow. But it isn’t a dream, it’s real and I think we’ve damn well more than earned it.”

Geralt made a sound of agreement and enveloped Jaskier in his arms. Jaskier in turn wrapped his own arms around the witcher's waist and held on tightly.

They stayed like that in comfortable silence, save for the birds chirping outside the window, accompanied by the hallowing wind, while the sun slowly made its way higher up in the sky.

Jaskier pulled back from where his head was buried in Geralt’s neck and yawned.

“It does get a bit boring though doesn’t it? We were terribly busy for such a long time and now there’s suddenly nothing to do.” He mused.

They had the entire keep to themselves for the foreseeable future and without even Vesemir there to assign them chores as usual he had grown somewhat restless.

Geralt smirked at the bard and in the blink of an eye he had pushed him to lie on his back as he climbed on top of him, pinning both his wrists over his head

“Are you sure about that?” He said with a tilt of his head, the silver locks framing his face swinging faintly back and forth. “Cause I can certainly think of a few things…”

Jaskier got over his surprise quickly and winked at his lover, a wicked grin pulling at his lips.

“Then please, feel free to elaborate.”

And Geralt did.

-----

 I sighed and eyed the little drawings that filled the page so far. None of them really spectacular, several flowers, random objects, bodies in different kind of poses from different angles and several sketches of faces. Well, more specifically, Jaskier’s face. I’ve drawn him a bunch of times by now, sometimes in secret and sometimes I even asked him to pose for me. In my defense, it was very convenient since he was there most of the time when I needed him, and if he wasn’t, I knew he would be back sooner or later, since we both shared this flat for several years now. 

 And he would never reject my requests to draw him. The perks of living with a man who earned his coin by performing and loved every kind of attention. He was a showman, thoroughly, always so eager to entertain people with his music and his presence and always wanting to make them happy. 

 But occasionally I even drew or sketched him without him knowing, simply because he often looked so aesthetically pleasing when he wasn’t even trying to, for example when he was playing his lute, engrossed in thoughts while he was composing a new song or whenever he was reading a book and totally forgot about everything and everyone around him. In both cases he did. And sometimes I just felt the urge to keep these moments forever, when he looked so relaxed and totally self-balanced, so I drew him. He never notices.  

 So, by now I’ve drawn his face so many times that I don’t need himself as reference anymore. I’ve memorized the shape of his eyes, his mouth, every wrinkle and beauty spot. But I’d never dare to let Jaskier know. Even though he surely would be flattered. But it would be embarrassing for me, because then I would have to admit that I spent hours and hours staring at him and analyzing every detail of his face and his frame in secret.

 My excuse, until this day, was simply that he was the easiest accessible reference picture and that I only needed to practice. I just really enjoyed drawing him.  

  A soft knock at the door made me look up. “You can come in, Jask”, I said as I closed my sketchbook and put it aside, when Jaskier opened the door. 

 “Hey uh … sorry for disturbing you, dear”, he said with an apologizing smile on his lips as he entered my room. “Oh, you were drawing? Can I see?”, he asked and pointed at my sketchbook.  

 “Ah, uh … Couldn’t get anything done really.”, I stated. “I’m quite uninspired these days. So … no, nothing to see."  

 "Ahh, what a shame”, Jaskier whined dramatically. I couldn’t help but laugh at how camp he was. 

 “Well … happens to the best of us”, I said in a playfully unimpressed tone and shrugged my shoulders. “Bet you’ve been there several times already as well.”

 Jaskier laughed and looked at me with a mischievous grin. “Well, from time to time. But then I’ll just find myself things – or people – that inspire me.” 

 I furrowed my eyebrows at the thought of the presumptive source of Jaskier’s inspiration.  It wasn’t a secret that Jaskier – as he called it – changed his muses often. I absolutely didn’t judge this way to live, I know Jask would never hurt or break anyone’s heart, at least not on purpose. 

 But I knew that this would not work for me, mostly because I didn’t have even half an ounce of his confidence and charm to be this popular with either men or women. And I was totally okay with it. 

 “I can imagine”, I said, with a smirk on my lips. “And I’m pretty sure you never lack of people who are very willing to inspire you.” Jaskier chuckled. “But don’t worry, I’ll find something that’ll inspire me sooner or later.” “Do you need me to inspire you?”, he said and winked. I tried to ignore that my heart skipped a beat and shook my head, “Don’t be ridiculous, Jask”, I said, even though I knew he was joking. He’d never know that he was more of an inspiration to me than anything or anyone else. But he didn’t know, and it better stayed this way. 

 “Well, the offer holds”, he said and smiled. I just mumbled something before I leaned my head back against the wall and faced the bard. “Did you just come here to tell me you want to inspire me or is there another reason you’re blessing me with your presence?” 

 “My visit actually holds a purpose. Not that I wouldn’t come to look after you without a purpose, that’s not what I meant”, he stuttered, but before he could get lost in apologies and explanations, I interrupted him. “Jaskier”, I said with a gentle smile. “I know what you mean. What’s the matter?” “Well uh ... I just wanted to ask, since your window’s facing west, if it would be possible for me to watch the sunset from your room? I saw it from the kitchen window and it seems to be very promising, but your window provides a much better view”, he explained. 

 “Sure thing, go ahead” I gestured at my window and smiled at him. Jaskier’s face lightened from excitement as he rushed to the window, opened it and leaned outside, elbows resting on the sill, his eyes basically glued to the sky in admiration as the clouds slowly turned deeply orange. 

 “Do you ... need a chair or something?”, I asked amused as I watched him. Jaskier just shook his head, not taking his eyes off the sky. “I’m fine, dear heart, no worries.” I chuckled and moved on my bed a bit to be able to look outside the window as well. The sky really looked incredible this evening. The horizon deep red already, the clouds above a warm orange, fading into a slight pink the higher they got on the sky. 

 I never knew Jaskier was a sunset person, but the way he observed the evening sky, absolute stunned by the view, proved me wrong. I could’ve never imagined Jaskier would find such fascination in something as simple as a sunset. Well, considering, I shouldn’t be too surprised. A sunset definitely held a special kind of aesthetic. Jaskier tended to see beauty in the simplest things. A feature he never failed to impress me with. But it was also something I’ve learned and took from him during the years of living together. Without knowing, he taught me to see beauty in the small, inconspicuous things, such as sunsets.  

 As I observed him, the way the warm light reflected on his face and made his skin practically glow I felt the urgent need to capture this exact picture. In a sketch, in a painting, it doesn’t matter. But I didn’t dare to move to grab and open my sketchbook, I was too afraid he would turn around and notice. And then I would have to explain. And probably also have to admit that this wasn’t the first time I drew him without him knowing. 

 So, I just kept watching him as he admired the sunset, the upper half of his face slowly disappearing in the shadows as the sun set, the excited glow remaining in his eyes.

  ---  

Somehow this became sort of a ritual. Almost every evening Jaskier would knock at the door of my room, asking if he could watch the sunset from my window. Even if I always said yes Jaskier insisted to ask for permission over and over again every evening, to make sure to never disturb me or anything. 

 I enjoyed this new routine a lot, always becoming sad when I saw that it was rainy or cloudy outside cause I knew that this meant that there would be no sunset for Jaskier to watch. 

 But this day was a day full of sun and clear, blue skies. I was more excited that I would admit, since it’s been raining for almost a week straight, which means Jaskier hadn’t come to my room to watch the sunsets for 4 days now. Not that I haven’t seen him in 4 days, I mean we lived together – but the sunset watching had something special. I couldn’t even explain it. I got used to it way too quickly.   

 But today there would be a sunset to watch, so I knew it wouldn’t be long before Jaskier would knock on my door. 

 While I was watering my plants to keep me busy, I remembered that Jaskier never brought a chair or anything but refused to let me get him one to sit on when he watched the sunset. I put the small bucket I always used when watering my plants away and went over to my bed. I decided to simply rearrange my room and place my bed under my window so Jaskier was basically forced to sit down. Can’t stand seeing him stand in front of the window for another 2 hours again. 

  I managed to get my bed halfway through my room as I overheard the familiar knock at my door.  “Come in”, I said, a bit out of breath since it wasn’t as easy to drag my bed to the other side of the room as I first thought. But I was more than halfway through. 

  Jaskier opened the door and opened his mouth to speak but stopped as he saw me there in the middle of my room, pulling on my bed frame. 

 “What, in the name of the great Melitele, are you doing?”, he said with an amused smile on his lips. “Need a hand?” He approached and started pushing at the other end of my bed to help me place it under the window. There was no need to tell him where I wanted to place it in the first place, my room didn’t prevent much space for my bed the way it was currently arranged. 

 “Thank you”, I panted and smiled at him. 

 “Anytime” Jaskier replied, as he looked around my room with his hands on his hips. “But what was that for?”

 I shrugged my shoulders. “Well, since you refuse to let me bring you a chair whenever you watch the sunset and never bring one your own, I’ll simply force you to sit down so you have it comfortable.”

 The bard looked at me and by the look in his eyes I couldn’t really tell if he was surprised or confused. “Dear heart, you know you didn’t have to do that. I absolutely don’t mind standing”, he spoke, but once again I interrupted him. “I know, Jaskier” I acknowledged as I put my plants that were standing in the corner where my bed was placed in the now free corner of my room. “I know I didn’t have to do this, but I wanted to. Besides, now I can watch the stars from here without having to leave my warm bed” I winked at him. “so, a win-win-situation for the both of us.”

 Jaskier chuckled, but kept standing in front of my bed when I already sat down again and grabbed my sketchbook.

 I could tell by the look on his face that he was arguing with himself if he could simply sit down on my bed. This man was unbelievable. 

 “Come on Jask, you usually don’t hesitate getting into a woman’s bed, do you?”, I teased. He chuckled as he climbed on the bed and rested his elbows on the windowsill. “That’s right, but the circumstances are usually … different, where I’m much bolder.”

 I couldn’t help but laugh. “What, being intimate with someone requires less courage than sharing a bed with one of your best friends when both of us are fully clothed and at different ends of the bed?”, I asked, playfully upset. “Am I that scary?”

 “Oh dear, you have no idea”, the bard joked and glanced over at me. “Especially when you’re hungry. One of the – very few – moments where I’d trade your company to a bruxa’s.” 

 I gasped overdramatically and furrowed my eyebrows. “Rude!”, I exclaimed, but couldn’t fully hide a smile. “Remember whose bed you’re sitting on. I could kick you out anytime, you know? You can go outside for a good view at the sunset then.”

 “You wouldn’t”, Jaskier stated and gave me a wink. “And you know that. And sure, I could, but that would mean I wouldn’t have such lovely company.” I scoffed and looked at him with a playfully offended and judging expression on my face. “Flatterer.” “You love me”, he said with a confident smile before he turned to look outside the window. 

 Indeed, I did. He was an idiot, but a lovely one. I barely knew anyone who wasn’t dotty about him.

 I sighed as I opened my sketchbook again, staring at the empty page without actually knowing what I was about to do. I didn’t have any idea what to draw, but I needed to do something to not just awkwardly sit there. Sure, I could watch the sunset, too.

 My eyes trailed from my sketchbook over to Jaskier, who sat in front of my window like paralyzed.  My hands almost automatically moved the piece of charcoal over the paper as I started to sketch the outlines of Jaskier’s face. He didn’t seem to notice, not me watching him, not the scratching of charcoal on paper. 

 With careful, quick strokes I moved the charcoal, hoping I would capture this moment, his silhouette, before he would move. The entire image was just – perfect. The dim light accentuated Jaskiers nose and jawline without making his face look too angular. His lashes casted dark shadows under his eyes and his chestnut hair looked even softer than usual. His eyes were sparkling in excitement and there was a slight, relaxed smile on his face. Within a few moments I managed to get a quite good sketch that captured this whole moment. I was craving to get my colors to round off everything, to have a perfect copy of this oh so perfect man in front of me. The only thing I could hope for was that I would be able to get the exact same colors mixed later on. This deserved to be painted on canvas.

 “It’s so beautiful”, the bard’s words interrupted my thoughts. I looked up, and my eyes met his. He smiled. “You should watch it! Come here”, he patted the mattress next to him as a sign for me to join him. I hesitated for a moment, since I wasn’t completely done with my sketch and didn’t want this moment to pass by. 

 But Jaskier’s eyes erased any doubts and I put my sketchbook aside, carefully, so it wouldn’t fall open and reveal what I have been working on. 

 I sat down next to him and rested my elbows on the windowsill as I turned to look at the sky. 

 “Oh wow”, I whispered. Jaskier was right, I really would’ve missed something. The sky looked incredible this evening. Even more than the other nights. I couldn’t describe what made the difference, if someone asked me. Maybe it was the clouds that looked different today. Puffier and more defined which made them seem as if they were so close to the ground and you could touch them if you just jumped high enough. Maybe it was that the deep red and orange colors of the sky perfectly matched with the leaves of the trees that indicated that fall was just around the corner. I didn’t know. All I knew was that this was just perfect.

 I felt Jaskier chuckle silently next to me more than I heard him. “Stunning, isn’t it?”, he murmured, and I glanced over at him for a second and smiled. 

 Both of us went silent again, eyes locked to the sky. 

 “You were drawing me, weren’t you?” Jaskier’s voice broke the silence after what felt like hours but were probably just a few minutes. I clenched my teeth, trying not to look too guilty. 

 “I … what? No”, I replied, desperately trying to let my voice sound confident. Jaskier laughed. “The way you’re avoiding my gaze is betraying you, little miss.”Internally I cursed myself for not being able to hold my facial expressions under control whenever I felt guilty of something. I was a damn bad liar. 

 “You’re … well, that’s true, I’ve painted you several times since you volunteer to act as my reference and”, I stammered, knowing full well that there was no going back.

 “Sure thing” he chuckled. “But you drew me right now. Before you sat down next to me.”  I opened my mouth but I knew I lost and there was no need in trying to defend myself. 

 I felt my cheeks flush bright red and buried my face in my hands. “Was I that obvious?”, I asked and Jaskier laughed. “Well … maybe a bit”, he admitted. I groaned, and suddenly I felt Jaskiers hand on my shoulder. I didn’t look up, though, I still was way too embarrassed. 

 “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to call you out or embarrass you or anything. That was not my intention”, he assured in a soft voice. “I absolutely don’t mind you doing this, not at all. If anything, I feel flattered. You always seem so happy and calm and peaceful when you draw, and if I can be helpful so you look so tranquil and happy, I’m more than glad.” 

 “You … wait, you watch me while I draw?”, I asked rather confused and looked up at him.