Edgin: I’m telling you, my team is competent.
Simon, rushing in: Edgin! Holga tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!
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Edgin: I’m telling you, my team is competent.
Simon, rushing in: Edgin! Holga tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!

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Simon: How petty can you get?
Edgin: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.
Simon: Everyone thinks I'm this soft cute person but I'm not!
Edgin: Simon, you cried for an hour after stepping on a bug yesterday.
Simon: It had feelings! It was probably going home to dinner and I killed it!
Holga: ...It was a bug.
Simon: It was a BEETLE, and its wife is definitely worried sick, wondering where it is, and I really don't get why you all think I'm so sentimental because I'm not!
Edgin: ...
Holga: ...
Simon: Stop looking at me like that!
Xenk: What do you do for a living?
Simon: I exist against my will.
Edgin: So when are we gonna tell them?
Doric: Just give them a minute.
Simon: *Pulling on a door that clearly says push.*

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Edgin: Is there anyone here who’s actually straight?
Simon: *raises hand*
Doric: *puts their hand down*
Holga: What? I'm not aggressive!
Simon: Last Tuesday, you wacked me with a pair of crocs and stole my chocolate chips?
Holga: Survival of the fittest, bitch.
Doric: So, what are we doing?
Simon: Wasting our lives.
Doric: I meant for lunch...