#shawnfluff

It’s been this little cat and mouse game between the two of you. Shawn’s a big flirt, he’s a nervous flirt, but a big flirt. He’s been leaving you on the edge of your seat since you joined tour and as much as you hate it you love it.

“Hey pretty girl.” Shawn smirks, flopping on the couch, arm lazily draping over your shoulders.

You look over at him, heart rate picking up at his touch.

“What?” You sigh, looking down at your notebook.

“Andrew wanted me to ask how the reading of your new contract was coming?” He drops his chin to your shoulder, small puppy dog look in his hazelnut eyes.

“I’m not sure, haven’t spoken to my manager today.” You answer without looking at him.

“Are you okay?” He asks, fingers trailing over your arm, drawing little shapes.

“Yep.” You respond, not meaning to be so cold but not able to handle the heartbreak anymore.

“Y/n?” He whispered, brushing the hair off your shoulder. His soft breathing fanning your neck.

“Hmm?” You asked, eyes falling shut for a second, falling back into his trap.

“Are you upset with me?” He asks, and you look over into his sad eyes.

“No,” Your hollow voice responds.

“Then why haven’t I seen you this week, and when I have you won’t speak to me?” He asks, running his nose up and down your neck.

“Been busy,” You swallow thickly.

His phone buzzes and he sighs before pulling away. When he’s leaning forward, reading the email Andrew sent him you feel like you can finally breathe.

He’s intoxicating, and his simple touch makes everything around you melt away.

He huffs and you look over, letting your eyes trail over his figure and your eyes halt and widen at the purple bruise peeking out of his collar on the back of his neck. Your heart shatters, and you have to leave. You can’t sit next to him.

You stand, grabbing your notebook and purse ready to leave the green room.

“Hey, wait.” He looks over at your retreating figure.

“I have to go Shawn,” You wipe the small tear from the corner of your eye.

“No please, I want to talk to you.”

“No Shawn, I can’t do this anymore.”

He blanches, heart picking up in fear. “Do what?” He breathes out.

“Can’t sit here and talk to you about your soul, and what you think love is, and how you want to have your heart broken. Because it sucks Shawn, having your heart broken sucks and I don’t wish it on anyone and I especially don’t wish it on you.”

With that you rush out of the room, heading down to your bus and far away from him.

Shawn sits stunned, he gapes at where you were standing as his heart pounds loudly in his chest.

Jet lag is a bitch but it’s okay this time around, now that Shawn’s here to keep you company.

Over this last flight and round of shows you two started to get close, liking the fact that someone else your age is around and understands.

He’s so interesting, the way he sees things, hears things, thinks of things. It’s so interesting to get his point of view, because it opens your eyes to his world.

“So why do you want your heartbroken?” You ask softly, picking at the edge of the pillow you were leaning on.

“To write a killer album.” He chuckles, but you just stare at him, not believing that it’s his whole answer. He notices you stare and takes in a deep breath. “Because to be heartbroken is to be loved. Or to have been in love. I don’t think I have been, puppy love maybe. You know the high school stuff, but not actually in love. Not the raw, real, love you know?”

“Yeah I get that. But if I’m gonna fall in love, I’d rather not get heartbroken.”

“Yeah being heartbroken isn’t ideal, but I think I say that because I’d like to know that feeling of love. Like my fans love me, my family and friends love me, but I want to know what being IN love with someone is like.”

“Well whoever breaks your heart will feel the wrath of all of your fans.”

He giggles, shaking his head making his curls flop before settling.

“I think it’ll age my soul,” He tosses his guitar pick up in the air, catching it and doing it again.

He sits and lets your past conversations run through his head before Andrew was bounding in the room, taking him off to sound check.

**

It’s the night of the last show, and Shawn’s been trying to have a moment of your time all day. He wants to talk, he wants to ask you questions, he wants answers.

“Y/n,” He calls when he spots you down the hall with a stagehand, conversing about a guitar change in your set.

You turn and look at him at him over your shoulder and panic a bit. He’s jogging towards you and when he makes it to you you have nowhere to go anymore.

“I need to steal her for a second.” He speaks from behind you.

“Of course, have a good show.” The stagehand bids to you both and returning back his work.

“What’s up Shawn?”

“I want to talk about what you said a few days ago.” He said pulling you into his dressing room.

“Okay, but I don’t have much time.”

“That’s bullshit and we both know it. You’re free till the show, I even checked with your manager. Ran into him before his meeting with Andrew and found out you’ve been free all day, but told me you were busy.”

You sigh, shaking your head.

“Y/n, why have you been so weird lately?” He asks before his phone goes off, Andrew’s name flashing across the screen. “Give me a minute,” He says holding his hand up at you while he answers his phone. “No going anywhere like last time.”

“I’m busy,” He says as he answers.

You can’t hear Andrew, but you do know what that meeting was about so you know what this call was. Shawn’s eyes go wide, snapping to you as his mouth drops and face pales.

“This is a joke,” He mumbles and you wince at the sound of his voice. “Y/n?” He says as you look away. “Y/n!” His voice grows louder.

“I’m sorry,” You whisper, wanting to curl in on yourself.

“What do you mean you aren’t extending? Why? Why not? What?” He’s stuttering, mainly because he doesn’t understand. “That means that tonight's-,”

“Tonight's my last show.” You nod softly.

“No!” He shakes his head. “No, wait let’s talk about this.”

By now he’s hung up on Andrew and he’s a pleading man in front of you.

“There is nothing to talk about Shawn,”

“Yes there is!”

“What? What is there to say?”

“You could start with why?” He laughs desperately.

“Because I have feelings for you Shawn,” You snap at him. “I have feelings for you and I can’t work with you and be with you all the time knowing you don’t feel the same. It’s torture, it is constant torture.”

“How do you know I don’t feel the same?” His brows furrow.

“Because since the day I met you I haven’t been able to get you off my mind, I can not even think of seeing someone else because they aren’t you.” You sigh, taking a seat making him follow. “And for awhile I wondered if you felt the same.”

“But you don’t anymore?” He asks softly.

“No I don’t.” You shake your head. “When we started tour you flirted all the time, and we had these little moments. Backstage after shows, after a circle with the bands we’d have little moments where you’d lean and I’d lean in, but then one of your girls would come skipping in and poof, our moment was gone.” You wipe your eye. “That’s how I know you don’t feel the same. Because if you did feel the same you wouldn’t be having hookups, you wouldn’t come walking by with hickeys on your neck, or have girls come backstage, into our safe zone from the strangers around us.”

He’s at a loss for words. And is trying to form his thoughts but is struggling because he can see how hurt you are, and how he’s the one who’s done that damage.

“I do have feelings for you,” He mumbles.

“There’s no way this is gonna work,” You shake your head. “Even if the feelings are mutual, you aren’t ready for this the way I am.”

“Yes I am,” He defends.

“Then why did you go out with that blonde last night, and why are you talking with models, and why are you sneaking girls in and out of your room when we’re at hotels?” You demand, he looks away. “If you say it was to make me jealous that just proves my point, because this isn’t high school Shawn. This isn’t a drama show, and you’re pure and soft, yes. But you say it yourself, your songs are your truth. We both know you live it.”

He sighs, shaking his head. “You can’t tell me that just because I’ve been with other girls that we can’t be together.” He pouts.

“We can’t count out the future, because we don’t know what’s to come. But I can count out right now, because right now you’ve broken my heart.”

He deflates, shoulders slumping and lips frowning.

“I’ve what?” He shakes out.

“I’ve had my heart broken by the biggest heart throb, and oh my god it hurts. It hurts to see you happy and it hurts so much when you walk in all put together going ‘Hey pretty girl’.”

His breathing has picked up, because now with the way you are speaking it’s making him scared that you are really leaving.

“Can we work on this? Just give me some time to fix this, to help put your heart back together.”

“I don’t have time,” You stand, wiping off your jeans.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I’m going on tour with someone else, I leave in a week.”

His heart stops. “You’re really leaving?”

“I’m sorry, but I need to take some time for myself. I need to rebuild myself.”

He’s tugging at his curls, shaking his head as his eyes get watery.

“Shawn,” You touch his arm, grabbing his attention. “Right now, there’s no way.”

He nods, bottom lip trapped between his teeth.

“There’s just no way it would work, we aren’t ready. We may be meant to be, but we aren’t ready right now. You have life you want to live, so do I. And as much as I’d like to live it with you, it won’t be healthy. We’ll end up hating and resenting each other and I don’t want to lose you.”

He looks confused, “I don’t want to lose you either, but you’re leaving, so I already am.”

“No,” You shake your head. “I’m not extending, I’m still working but with a different team. But you aren’t losing me. I might be gone for awhile, but I’d like to know that if I needed you you’d be there.”

“I would be.” He nods quickly.

“So will I.” You agree.

“So,” He looks at you. “Not right now, but in the future?” He makes sure he’s understanding.

Y/N entered the large house, shuddering at the smell of alcohol and sweaty bodies. She shuddered at the bright fluorescent lights over head. Music blared through the house as two people made out in the entryway of the house.

Y/N shoved through the dancing bodies and made her way to the kitchen. Her goal was to get in, eat a few of Shawn’s specialty peanut butter bars, and get out.

She came tonight because Shawn had invited her, but she wasn’t planning on socializing with anyone. All she wanted was to e peanut butter bars. Plus, when Shawn asked her if she had come, she wouldn’t have to lie to him about it.

Shawn had been trying to get Y/N to come to a group hangout for a month. But she had been avoiding him like the plague. Truth is, she was hurt and embarrassed.

A little over a month ago, she had confessed that she had a huge crush on Shawn and he…well he didn’t really say anything about it. Y/N in a desperate attempt to save their friendship, played it off as not a big deal, saying that it was just a small crush and she would get over it and that they could still be friends.

But in reality, it was a huge deal. This crush had been going on since 6th grade. Heck, Y/N might as well be in love with Shawn.

Ever since that night, she’s been trying her best to make up excuses not to hang out with him. She couldn’t face him without feeling that heartbreak that she had felt that first week after finding out her feelings weren’t reciprocated.

Shawn begged her to come to this party, said he would stay with her the whole night, hell he even said she could stay the night if she wanted! And to top it all off, he said he was making 3 pans of her favorite dessert: peanut butter bars. So she finally gave in, because how could she deny Shawn of something he wanted. She loved him too much. Plus, it wasn’t his fault he didn’t feel the same.

Shawn: hey, u here yet? if i don’t see you here in the next 10 minutes, im sending Brian to come get you. I would get you myself, but like, I’m kinda hosting a party that you’re supposed to be at RIGHT NOW!!

Y/N sighed as she saw the text come through on her phone. Maybe she should just text him and tell him that she popped in, but was feeling sick so she had to leave.

She finally found the peanut butter bars and was about to start piling them onto a plate when she heard the kitchen door open. “Hey, there you are. I though that I would check in here one last time before sending Brian to come get you. I knew you couldn’t resist these,” she heard the voice of the one person she had been trying to avoid.

She took a few deep breaths before turning around and looking into the brown eyes of her best friend. The only thing he would ever be to her. All the pain she had been dealing with the past month came rushing back to her. “Yeah, you found me!” She said, trying to sound enthusiastic.

“How are they?” Shawn pointed his finger at the bars he had made.

“I don’t know. Haven’t had a chance to try them yet. I was just about to before you interrupted me,” she chuckled turning away from him, not being able to stare into his eyes any longer.

She grabbed a bar and took a bite out of it. “Mmm,” she moaned. “So good,” she whispered as she finished eating the brownie. “Thanks for making these Shawnie, but I think I’m going to head out. It’s been a long day. Work was hard and I’m feeling kinda tired.”

She tried to leave the kitchen before Shawn could stop her but she should’ve known better. Shawn knew her better than she knew herself. There was no way she was leaving that kitchen until she answered a few questions for him.

“You’ve been avoiding me! For a whole month! I’ve been trying to get a hold of you, trying to hang out with you and you just pushed me away. What’s wrong honey?”

Y/N’s breathing grew shallow at this. ‘Honey’ had been his nickname for her since forever. But she had always thought of it as a term of endearment. That when he used it, maybe, just maybe, he thought the same way about her as she did about him.

“Please, Shawn, I don’t want to talk about it right now. I’m tired and I want to go home.”

“No! Because I don’t want you to pull this stunt again! I don’t want you to avoid me for another month. You know how much you mean to me. I just want…just please, tell me what’s wrong.”

Y/N felt her blood boil and an aching sadness come over her. “Fine! You want to know why I’m avoiding you?! I told you how I felt about you and you laughed at me. Right in my face as I poured my heart out to you! And then you didn’t even try to stop me as I walked out of your house, tears falling down my face!” Her voice quieted towards the end as she fought the choking feeling in the back of her throat and the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes.

Shawn’s face softened as he stared at his best friend. She pulled her hand out from his grasp and tried to make a hasty escape out of the house but Shawn caught her just as she had reached her car.

“Honey! Honey! Let me explain, please!” Shawn pleaded with her.

Y/N didn’t say anything, just kept on searching her purse for her keys. “I promise you honey, it’s all just a misunderstanding. You see, earlier that night, Brian had been teasing me about how big of a crush you had on me and I just thought he was joking around because I didn’t ever think you would like me back. So when you told me how you felt, I thought Brian had put you up to so I just laughed it off. And when you left right after I thought you were just mad that your prank hadn’t worked. If I had known that you were telling the truth, I never would’ve laughed at you, I swear.”

Y/N sniffled a few times before finally looking up at Shawn. She shoved him playfully before letting out a small chuckle through her cries. “You’re such a dumbass.”

“Yeah, I am. But I’m a dumbass who’s been in love with his best friend for the longest time and wants to know if she can forgive him.”

Y/N’s heart pounded in her chest at his confession. Wasting no time at all, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a soft and sweet kiss. The salt from her tears mixed into the taste of his cherry chapstick he was always using. It was a short blissful kiss and when they both pulled apart, she rested her forehead on his.

“I’m guessing I’ve been forgiven?”

Y/N nodded head head letting out a small chuckle.

Shawn walked out of their house, broken heart in hand, and heavy box in his pocket. It used to feel lighter when the idea of her saying 'yes' seemed like the only possibility that could happen. But now that he didn't know what had just happened in there, the box felt heavier than anything he had ever held. He got into his car, frantically calling his mom.

"Mom, I'm coming to stay with you tonight. I don't want to talk about it. Can you just...set up my room for me please?"

Karen sighed on the other end of the line. "Oh, Hun, of course. You're always welcome here, I just hope that whatever it is can be resolved before Saturday."

Saturday. The day he was going to pop the question. Except for that wasn't going to be happening anymore because she had broken his heart. There was no more question to ask.

"Thanks, Mom. Love you," He hung up the phone as a tear slid down his cheek. He hadn't even realized that he was crying. As he pulled away, he saw her silhouette in the upstairs window—she was watching him leave. How could she let him go so easily?

Little did Shawn know that Y/N was a wreck. She had instantly regretted breaking up with him as soon as she had done it. But she feared commitment. She feared something so serious. She didn't know how to tell him, but she knew that if he asked her to marry him, she would've said yes, and that scared the shit out of her.

She had trudged up the stairs to their shared bedroom and had decided to watch him drive off. He hadn't even fought for their relationship. He just stuttered over a few words and left. Did they even mean anything at all to him? The lights to his car faded down the street and sobs wracked through her body. She was finally able to stand and force herself to get into the shower. She spent an hour in the hot, steamy bathroom thinking about her and Shawn's relationships. She thought of all the good moments—their first date.

*Flashback*

"Okay, this is going to sound so cliché, but I don't want the paparazzi finding us so we're hiking up in the mountains."

Y/N's eyebrows shot up. "I don't know, sounds kind of like something a serial killer would say to lure someone in." Shawn pushed her lightly and drove up the bumpy and dusty trail to the hiking path.

"Well sorry for trying to make sure we have a private moment. Maybe you plan the next one and see how easy it is to plan away from the paparazzi."

Y/N smirked. "So, you want a second date with me."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Yea, I'm pretty sure I made that clear when I told you I loved you and wrote about a million songs about you. I'm crazy for you, babe. And I'm excited to see where this goes," he grabbed her hand and intertwined it with his own.

Y/N felt a blush creep onto her cheeks. "You're really cute, you know that Mendes?"

It was Shawn's turn to go red.

"Alright, we're here. It's only 3 miles roundtrip."

Y/N nodded. "Doesn't sound too bad, except for the fact that I'm stuck with you for the next four and half hours."

"Hey! I am personally offended by that! I take you on this nice date, I pack a picnic for us, and this is how you repay me." Y/N felt her heart melt as he pulled out a picnic basket from the back of his car with the classic red and white checkered blanket. "Well damn Mendes! You really outdid yourself."

Shawn scratched the back of his neck nervously. "Is this too much for the first date? I thought it would be cute but-," Y/N smashed her mouth onto his.

"It's adorable. You're adorable. Thank you, really."

"Mm, you're welcome. Anything for you darling," He kissed her on the nose then grabbed her hand, pulling her off towards the direction of their hike.

When they finally arrived, they were in a clearing with a water fall off to the side and a tall oak tree with a tire swing hanging from it that provided some shade. If you climbed a little higher on the hill, you could see all of Toronto.

"It's beautiful."

"I know," Shawn said, but he wasn't looking at the skyline.

They ate dinner (Shawn had packed sweet pork, salad, dressing, fruit, veggies, cheese, etc.) as the sun was setting. Then Shawn pushed Y/N on the tire swing before climbing on with her. They used their momentum to turn around in circles and they couldn't stop laughing.

Finally, as the stars started to come out, Shawn led Y/N back to the top of the hill, and they stargazed for an hour—Y/N's head on Shawn's chest as they lay in each other's arms.

Right as they were about to leave, Shawn picked Y/N up and ran under the waterfall with her, much to her protests.

"Urgh! Shawn! I don't want to be wet! It's cold outside and it's dark!" He chuckled. "It's not funny!" "Yeah, it kind of is. You look like a wet dog."

"Yeah, well this is a very angry wet dog!" Y/N started to stomp off in the direction of the car before Shawn called her back to him.

"A very beautiful wet dog who has a very thoughtful boyfriend that packed a towel for her!"

She quickly turned around, still fuming, and grabbed the towel Shawn had held out to her. "Thanks," she muttered quietly before trouncing off to the car.

Shawn shook his head at her, a small smile painted on his face. He was pretty sure he just fell more in love.

*Flashback*

Y/N grabbed a towel as she heard her phone going off in the other room. She hoped it was Shawn calling her to try to figure something out, but it was Karen. Her heart dropped. What if something had happened to Shawn.

"Hello?"

"Why is my son back at my house? He should be with you. How bad was the fight?" Her distressed voice sent Y/N into a frenzy. She was on the verge of having a panic attack. Too much had happened that night.

"I'm...I'm sorry Karen. I...there's not really much to say. I've got to go, bye." She quickly hung up the phone as tears pricked her eyes again.

Her breathing started to become erratic and her visioned blurred. She sat down on her bed, trying to think of ways to calm herself down, but nothing was working. Then she remembered a voice memo Shawn had recorded for her.

She quickly hit play. "Hey darling. If you're using this then that means that I'm not there and you're having a bad panic attack. I need you to relax and match you're breathing with mine. Ready? Inhale...Exhale. Inhale...Exhale. Inhale...Exhale. That's it baby, you're doing so good. Inhale...Exhale. Inhale...Exhale. Alright, perfect. Just a few more times and if you still need to breathe after that, just go back 15 seconds. Inhale...Exhale. Inhale...Exhale. Good job.

"K, you did so good with your breathing exercises. I need you to splash some cold water on your face and then go get a drink of water. I love you. Call me if you need anything. Sorry I wasn't there with you. Bye beautiful." Her breathing slowed down, and she was able to take a breath of air without choking on it. What was she going to do? How...how was she going to recover from this? She couldn't go crawling back to Shawn, saying she made a mistake.

She got into the bed that her and Shawn shared and pulled the covers over her head, crying into her pillow. Tarzan followed her into the bed, unaware that his mom and dad were fighting. Y/N had thought that Shawn had taken Tarzan, but here he was nosing his head against her hand, begging for pets. She knew that Shawn left Tarzan for her so she wouldn't be so alone, but inevitably, Tarzan wouldn't be hers and neither would this house.

***

Shawn awoke that morning in a cold sweat. It was bright outside—really bright—and he wondered what time it was. He rubbed his eyes trying to rid them of their soreness from all the crying he did last night. He looked at his nightstand table and saw the blue velvet box carrying the ring. He picked it up and threw it across the room, angry at himself. He had to have done something to make her feel like their relationship wasn't worth it. He should've fought harder. He pulled at his curls and stood from his bed, picking up the shirt he threw on the floor last night.

He bumped into Aaliyah as he left his room, knocking her to the ground. "Watch where you're going, you klutz!" He yelled at her.

"What the hell!?" She stood from her spot on the ground and slapped his arm. "That was uncalled for you ass!" She stormed down the stairs and into the kitchen.

Shawn sighed. He wasn't trying to be mean to his sister, he was just so angry. "Shawn, sweetie, can you come down the stairs?" His mother's sweet voice calmed him down for a minute.

When he reached the bottom staircase, his mom pulled him into a tight embrace. "Everything's going to be okay Shawn. Maybe you're just overreacting. I called Y/N and she seemed really distraught."

Shawn pulled back from the hug and looked at his mom's face. "Did she...did she say she wanted to see me."

His mom sent him a nervous smile. "Well not exactly but-,"

"Did she mention me at all?"

"No, but Shawn! She seemed sad and evasive. Please Shawn, tell me what happened. I'm trying to help you resolve this before tomorrow."

Shawn groaned. "We broke up mom! Okay! Happy?!"

Karen's face dropped and Aaliyah looked at him with heartbroken eyes. "We broke up! Or...I guess she broke up with me. And there was nothing I could do to stop it. She said we weren't progressing anymore in our relationship and that she thought we were better off as friends. Apparently, our relationship is 'stale.' Whatever that means!"

Shawn scoffed and turned away from them. He couldn't watch the sad look on their faces anymore. It was already hard enough for him to lose her.

He felt tiny hands wrap around his middle and slightly larger ones pulling him into their embrace. "It'll be okay, Shawn."

And that's when he broke down again. Because how could it ever be okay if she wasn't in his arms? How could he ever heal?

***

"Hey Brian, I umm... I don't know if Shawn's told you yet, but we broke up. I...umm, I've decided I'm going to move back to the States and maybe try finishing college there. Canada is too expensive for me to live when I don't have a partner to help pay rent. Umm...I was just wondering if you could help me gather my things and get them in the moving van...please," She whispered through the phone.

Sure, she had good friends in Toronto, but not really any male friends besides Shawn's. And she really needed some help packing. She didn't want to do it all by herself. And it's not like she could call Shawn.

"I...wow! That's...not what I was expecting to hear. But umm...yeah. If you need help, I'll be there. Just tell me the time and place."

"Mm, thanks."

***

"What the hell did you do?! Y/N calls me crying saying she's moving back to the States. Did you break her heart Mendes?"

Shawn was startled to see his redheaded best friend in his doorway yelling at him. "I...she broke up with me dude. I would never initiate it. I just wanted to make it easy for her. She didn't want to fix it, so I thought I should respect her and not go against her wishes." Brian brought Shawn into a hug. "Ahh, I'm sorry man. She didn't seem so happy about it though. Maybe you should go talk to her. She's moving to the States for damn's sake!"

Shawn shook his head. "I'm not sure if I'm the right person to talk some sense into her. I already did it once and look what it has come to."

"Shawn, the relationship being 'stale' isn't even a word I ever thought Y/N would use to describe your relationship. There's got to be something else going on. I mean come on! You guys have been talking about marriage for a few months now, does she really think you guys aren't progressing. Hell! You bought her a ring and you're really going to tell me she thought the relationship was going in a completely opposite direction. Here's what you're going to do, you're going to go to her, and you're going to propose to her, got that?"

Shawn nodded, feeling invigorated. Brian was right. What's the worst that could happen, she would say no? At this rate, him being rejected like that was better than him not trying.

But when he got to their house, all her stuff was in boxes and a note was taped to the counter:

Hey Brian!

I decided I was going to leave early to start spring semester. Would you mind shipping these boxes to 8210 West 3600 North, Manchester, USA. The money is enclosed in the envelope. I also got a new number. If you need anything, DM me on Instagram and I'll give you my number, thanks for being so supportive in all of this.

Yours truly,

Y/N

"Shit! Shit! Shit! I'm too late!" Shawn pulled at his locks and Brian grabbed his wrist, stopping him.

"I...I'm really sorry man. I...maybe you just need some space from each other. Then maybe after a few months, she'll take you back."

"No! You don't get it! I'm really scared, Brian! I don't think she's in the right mental state! You never saw her when she was severely depressed! I'm such an idiot! I should've seen the signs! You need to call her right now!"

***

~1 month later~

"Hey guys! Umm...this song is really special to me. I'm glad you guys get to hear it. These emotions are super real things that I've been feeling this past month and I'm a little nervous to let you guys hear it. Alright, hope you enjoy."

Y/N watched as the YouTube livestream turned off and Shawn's face disappeared from the screen. He looked like a piece of shit. His hair was messy, his eyes had bags underneath them—he didn't look much different than Y/N.

Y/N watched the screen as Shawn walked through the Toronto streets, fake snow falling on him as he sung the lyrics to a beautiful song called "It'll Be Okay." She knew it was about her. She knew he was missing her.

He had called her a few days after the breakup off Brian's phone. He was in a tizzy, worried that she was going to hurt herself. And truthfully, she was glad he checked in on her, even though it reopened the wound. Part of the reason that Y/N broke up with Shawn was because she felt bad burdening him with her mental health issues. She couldn't continue doing that to him. So, she left.

During the call, she reassured him that she wasn't going to hurt herself (a lie, she had already cut a few times since the breakup) and she was seeing a therapist to help her deal with her emotions (this wasn't a lie, and the therapist was super helpful).

She cried through the entire "It'll Be Okay" video, and when it finally ended, she drug her self back to bed and cried some more.

***

Shawn had written "It'll Be Okay" as a message to Y/N to let her know that he still loved her. He wanted her back in his life, but he was scared. What if she didn't want him back in hers.

About two hours ago, he irrationally bought a ticket to Manchester New York and was now on his way to her house. He didn't know what to expect, but the ring in his pocket motivated him to keep going. She loved him, there was no way she could've faked all the tender moments they had together. He just didn't know if she would take him back.

When he finally got to her house, he nervously knocked and fidgeted with the box in his pocket. He had to think of the best way to do this. Should he just kneel right here? Should he wait to see her reaction.

'Screw it!' He thought as he got down on one knee. He felt his heart jump as she opened the door—face red from crying and frizzy hair—and smiled at him. She smiled at him.

"Shawn, before you say or do anything...if you're proposing to me, I'll say yes. I love you and should've never broken up with you! That was the worst mistake of my life! I've regretted it every day since. I just thought that I was a burden, especially with my mental health problems, but I've been working on it, and I'm on the road to getting better!"

A few tears spilled down Shawn's cheeks. How did he get so lucky? "Babe...you...I love you so much! I had this whole speech planned but seeing you physically in front of me has taken my breath away. So, I think I'll just ask the question. Will you Y/N L/N marry me? Will you allow me the chance to wake up next to you every day, to love you? Will you let me be the father of your children? Will you grow old with me?"

"Yes, I'll marry you! I'm so sorry-" Shawn cut her off by pulling her into a kiss as he slipped the diamond ring onto her finger.

"I can't wait to spend a lifetime with you."

A/N: This was really sucky, sorry. Love you guys and I hope you like it, despite how much I hated the plot of this.

Y/N and Shawn had gone on a few dates, but they hadn’t kissed yet. It seemed like every time they were about to, something happened.

Attempt 1:

The first time Shawn had tried to kiss her was on their first date. They had met through Brian—Shawn’s best friend and Y/N’s college friend—who immediately introduced them at a party thrown at his house.

“Bro, you’ve got to meet her! She’s hot as hell and she’s just your type! Trust me!” Shawn chuckled and reluctantly went with his friend to meet another girl that he would set him up with.

But when he first saw her, he couldn’t believe his eyes. Tan skin—which was practically impossible in the cloudy Canadian weather—and a beautiful figure. She was hot as hell! But that wasn’t what drew him in. It was her warm, caressing smile, that sent shivers down his spine.

“Y/N, this is my friend, Shawn, the one I was telling you about earlier.” Y/N rolled her eyes at Brian giving Shawn a knowing look.

“Has he tried to set you up with about half the room too?”

Shawn laughed before vigorously nodding his head. “Uh-huh. And he thinks he’s the ‘Master Matchmaker’ or something. No one he’s ever set me up with has been right for me.”

“Hey! Let’s not bash on our amazing friend Brian. He’s still right here you know. And I think I might be right about you two. Just trust me on this one.” Brian threw his hands up defensively before walking away from the pair.

“So, I’m guessing he thinks we would be a good match then, eye Shawn.” She gently elbowed his rib cage and sent him a wink.

“I guess so. You know, out of all the girls he has tried to set me up with, you’re the only one that I actually would love to take on a date.” He scratched the back of his neck, his face turning red.

“Sure you don’t say that to all your other matches?” She teasingly flirted with him, loving to see him flustered.

“I pinky swear,” and he held up his pinky for her to link with his. She connected their pinkies and kissed her thumb. He followed suit.

“Now it’s set in stone. I’m going to take you on a date Y/N.”

And so, the next night, Shawn was frantically running around his apartment, laying out blankets and pillows on the couch. He wanted to make a pillow fort with her and cuddle up with hot chocolate while watching a Christmas movie. He figured it would be a good first date idea without the paparazzi bothering them.

She agreed to drive to his house so that the paparazzi wouldn’t find out where she lived. She wore a hoodie over her head, glasses, and a hat to conceal her identity from the nosy cameramen waiting outside Shawn’s apartment building.

Shawn waited for her in the lobby, praying that the crowd didn’t deter her. He was really looking forward to getting to know this beautiful girl. He led her to the elevator, his hands shaking as he opened his apartment door.

Her eyes lit up when she saw the blanket fort in the middle of the living room and “Elf” set up on the T.V. “Wow, you really do know how to make a girl’s heart melt, don’t you Rockstar?” And just like that, he felt his heart start to fall.

Later that night, as she lay her head on his chest, and they were wrapped up under a blanket together, he gently moved his hand beneath her chin. She gazed up at him and he could feel the tension in the room. Her lips looked so soft, and her skin danced in the light of the T.V.

He waited…one breath…two breaths. And then he slowly leaned in as she did the same. But right before their lips collided, a blaring ringtone sounded through the room. “Shit,” Shawn swore under his breath as he saw who was calling him. “Hey Andrew.”

The mood had been ruined and surprise, surprise, no kiss for either of them.

Attempt 2:

Shawn couldn’t ask Y/N on another date fast enough. As soon as she had texted that she had gotten home safely, he immediately asked her on a second date. She agreed and this time, he was going to kiss her.

He invited her to a horse-drawn sleigh ride and a romantic walk in a snowy forest. This time, he picked her up from her house and brought her to the carriage ride. He made her feel like a princess by helping her into the sleigh and offering her a blanket he had packed. She gently pecked him on the cheek, which was close, but not close enough.

Then, on their walk through the path in the forest, Y/N decided she wanted to build a snowman. As soon as she said the word, Shawn started to roll a ball out for the body. She helped him push it when it became too big, and they repeated the process with the other two snowballs.

They hadn’t brought anything for the snowman to have, but Y/N willingly sacrificed her scarf for the cause. Shawn was able to find some arm like branches slightly off the trial. He also found a few rocks to be the snowman’s nose, mouth, and eyes. And finally, Shawn removed his red knitted beanie hat and placed it on the snowman’s head.

Y/N found his tousled hat hair very attractive and wondered what it would be like to run her fingers through it. But her thoughts were interrupted when she heard Shawn say, “We should name him. What do you think?”

“Tarzan! That was my favorite Disney movie as a kid!”

“Really?! I’ve always wanted a dog named Tarzan, but this works out okay.” She chuckled and placed another kiss on his cheek.

Then the world seemed to stop moving as they stared into each other’s eyes once again. The tension rose and Shawn felt more than just butterflies in his stomach. It was a whole zoo. But right before their lips connected, a giant pick-up truck drove by and covered the two in snow.

They laughed it off and decided it was for the best that they go back to the sleigh.

Attempt 3:

It was now December first and Shawn, and Y/N hadn’t been on a date in a few weeks. Both being very busy with the holiday season quickly approaching. Shawn was scheduled for a lot of studio time because they wouldn’t be recording as much during the weeks of December. Y/N was journalist and was swamped with articles to write about fun things to do around town during Christmas.

They had of course called, texted, and facetimed during the three-week period that they were separated, but they both longed to go on another date. And it wasn’t like they hadn’t seen each other. Brian had a Friendsgiving party that they were both invited to the day before Thanksgiving, but Y/N had to leave early to spend the night at her parents’ house, and Shawn showed up after she left.

He called her that night and whispered to her sweet nothings as she fell asleep. That was when she knew she was done for. For heaven’s sake she hadn’t even kissed this man and she was already falling for him hard.

To say they were excited to go on their next date was understatement. Shawn had secured tickets to a Maple Leaf’s game to which she embarrassingly admitted that she had never seen a full game of hockey. He was shocked at first, but then he realized how cute it would be to be able to explain his favorite sport to her.

He lent her one of his Maple Leaf jerseys kissing her on the cheek as she got into the car. She was nervous to be going out in public with Shawn when they hadn’t really established what they were, but he assured her that him and his PR team would take care of everything. Y/N wasn’t sure that they could keep the entire thing under wraps, but she wanted to go on this date, so she put her fears aside.

“Alright, it’s sort of like basketball and soccer, but on ice,” Shawn tried to explain as they sat in the highest row in the arena. Shawn said that they had to sacrifice good seats for privateness. “Two players—one from each team—have a face off for the puck. Then, the rest of the team tries to score a goal.”

“Okay, so not too complicated.”

“No, not too complicated,” He chuckled and gently grabbed her hand.

The game started and the players skated across the ice. Y/N got really into the game and even started to yell at the refs for making bad calls. Shawn was so enthralled with the beautiful girl next to him, that when she turned to look at him, he started to lean in. It was going to happen; he could feel it.

And then, “Look at who we’ve caught on the kiss cam! Shawn Mendes and the beautiful gal next to him,” Shawn quickly pulled away and looked up at the jumbotron. He was pissed. His face was displayed on the screen next to Y/N. A light blush dusted both of their cheeks and they looked flustered.

“Well, why don’t you finish what you started before we interrupted,” the announcer said. Shawn flipped the announcer off and stood quickly from his spot, grabbing Y/N’s hand, and leading her out of the arena.

“I’m so sorry,” he said when they made it to the lobby. “We can go back in there and finish watching the game if you want.”

“No, that’s okay.” She was quiet for the rest of the night until they reached her house.

Shawn awkwardly scratched the back of his neck as he spoke, “So, my family wants me over in a few days to spend some time with them, and I was wondering if you maybe wanted to come. You can totally say no, but it would mean a lot to me if you could.”

Y/N smiled softly at him. “I would love to meet your family.” She hugged him and gave him a soft peck on his cheek before retreating inside her house for the night.

The next week, Y/N sat at the Mendes’ dinner table, Shawn’s hand wrapped around hers. They had just sat down to eat dinner and Y/N was ready to answer all the questions the Mendes had for her.

“So, Y/N, Shawn said that you are a journalist at The Toronto Star. How are you liking that?” Karen had asked, a loving smile on her face. From the second Shawn had told his mom about Y/N, she had begged him to bring her over. She loved how happy Y/N made her son.

“It’s amazing! I love every second of it! I always knew I wanted to be a writer but working at The Toronto Star is my dream job.” Shawn smiled happily at her. He loved the way her eyes lit up when she talked about her job.

“That’s great! I’m glad to see that you’ve found your passion so young in life, just like Shawn.”

Y/N nodded her head shyly and took a bite of the chicken Karen had made. “Wow! This is amazing Mrs. Mendes.”

“Call me Karen,” Karen shot Shawn a side eye, and while Y/N took a sip of her water, she mouthed ‘She’s a keeper,’ to her son. Shawn just chuckled quietly.

The entire family seemed to love Y/N, but Aaliyah got really attached super-fast. Y/N and Aaliyah talked about books that they loved, movies that made them cry, actors they found attractive (to Shawn’s dismay, Y/N thought Timothée Chalamet was hot), and everything in between the two.

Then Karen said the words that Shawn had been waiting for her to say all night. “Why don’t you show her to your room. I’m sure she would love to see a glimpse of your childhood.”

Shawn nodded his head and led Y/N to his bedroom. Little did she know that Shawn had set up mistletoe at the top of the staircase. A small smirk played at his lips as they reached the second floor and he pointed at the ceiling.

Y/N stared at the mistletoe for a few seconds laughed and said, “Well I guess we can’t break tradition now, can we?”

Shawn gently shook his head and placed his hand behind Y/N’s ear. His thumb gently caressed her cheek as they slowly leaned into each other, their breath’s mixing together. And then his lips were on hers, and there was an explosion of fireworks, and the world seemed to stop moving. It was just the two of them, and nothing else mattered.

All too soon they were pulling away to take a breath of air. “Now that we’ve finally kissed, will you be my girlfriend? I know it’s soon, but we’ve known each other for a mo—” but he never finished his sentence because her lips were on his, and suddenly, he forgot how to do anything but kiss her.

She rested her forehead on his and whispered, “Sneaky little Mendes. Hanging a mistletoe up just to steal a kiss from me.” She pecked his lips again. “And yes, I’ll be your girlfriend.”

“Good because I almost fell off the ladder putting this up.”

A/N: This is a part of a new Christmas series I am doing called the 12 Days of Christmas. It’s a bunch of different imagines that start with this one and build off this relationship. Thanks for reading and thanks for 3k reads! Love you and hope you have a very happy holiday!!

Taglist: @mendesblurb

Day 7

🌨Snowed In

Drew: Hey Y/N! I was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime. It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, and I would love to get back in touch. I have some things I need to say to you. ;)

Shawn watched as Y/N’s phone blew up on his nightstand. They had been cuddling in his bed for the past hour, watching Home Alone. Y/N had said she had to go to the bathroom and left her phone on his nightstand. The light and sound coming from it was annoying him, so he picked up her phone to turn it to silent mode, until he saw the person who was texting her.

Drew.

The name didn’t ring any bells. She hadn’t mentioned a friend named Drew. His eyes scanned over the text that Drew sent to her. He clenched his jaw. Who was this guy and why did he want to meet up with his girlfriend?

He heard the bathroom door opening and was hastily trying to set her phone back down on his nightstand. He didn’t want to be caught snooping, but it was too late. “Why do you have my phone?” Y/N stared at him suspiciously, one eyebrow raised, before walking towards the bed.

“I…it was blowing up with texts, so I was trying to turn it onto silent mode,” he quickly blubbered out. It wasn’t a lie, so he didn’t necessarily feel guilty about it.

“Okay, should we get back to watching the movie?” Shawn nodded his head and lifted the blanket for Y/N to crawl under. Insecurity started to seep into his bones. He knew Y/N was a gorgeous woman, the most beautiful one he had ever seen. And he knew she was desirable, but what if Drew was some amazing guy that she liked better than Shawn? Then what? Would he have to watch her leave him for another man?

Y/N kept texting someone on her phone with a small smile on her face, and Shawn couldn’t help but think that it was this Drew guy. He shook it off, not wanting to come off as the jealous boyfriend, and turned his head back to the screen.

But after twenty minutes of that, Shawn paused the movie and looked right at his girlfriend. “Who are you texting?”

Her face paled, “No one.” Truthfully, Y/N had already taken care of her business with Drew. She sent him a simple text telling him she had already got a boyfriend and she was not interested in getting back together with him. He was a past boyfriend of hers that she could never seem to get over until Shawn.

The real person she was texting was Karen to ask her if Shawn would like the Christmas present, she bought him. Karen responded with a bunch of things, but she also asked Y/N what she thought she should get him for Christmas. Y/N was giving Karen some suggestions when Shawn had asked her the dreadful question.

Shawn sent her a look. “Really, no one? Cause I can clearly see your thumbs typing away on your screen.”

Y/N sighed, “You don’t have to be so nosy, don’t worry about it.”

But that only alerted Shawn more. How could he not worry about her texting another guy? “Umm, I’m worried because I saw that a guy named Drew was texting you earlier.”

Y/N’s eyes went wide as she stared at Shawn. “Were you snooping on my phone?!” The utter disbelief in her voice caused Shawn to shrink. He hadn’t been “snooping” per se, more like he saw who was texting her and was curious.

“I wasn’t snooping. I…who is he?”

Y/N shook her head at him and stood from the bed. “Un-freaking-believable! Wow! I…I thought I could trust you! I thought you trusted me!” He could feel the anger radiating off her and it scared him. Y/N and him had not gotten into a fight yet and he was worried this would be their first. He was even more worried that she might break up with him because of it. He knew how important trust was to her in a relationship. It was just as important to him to, but he wasn’t trying to look at her texts, it just sort of happened.

“No, baby, please,” Y/N had run out of the room and was now by Shawn’s front door. He had chased after her and was blocking her from leaving. “I promise, it isn’t what you think it is. I wasn’t trying to dig around, I promise. I trust you with my life Y/N.”

“Do you?! Because if you did, you wouldn’t have questioned me about who I was texting1 Now please, move out of the way.”

Shawn stood his ground; a pleading look in his eyes. “Baby, it’s snowing. At least stay the night.”

She shook her head at him. “To hell with the storm, I just can’t be around you right now. If you love me, you will let me leave.”

Shawn’s heart broke. He battled with the idea of letting his upset girlfriend drive alone on the icy roads by herself, or if he shouldn’t let her leave and risk losing his relationship with her. “Just…please…drive safe. And text me when you get back to your place.” He sent her one last longing look as she walked out of his apartment. He fell apart on the floor, sliding down against the door.

***

Y/N drove slowly down the icy roads, regretting her decision to leave Shawn’s house. What if she was overreacting? What if he really did have a logical explanation for being so protective over her. She felt a few tears slide down her cheek as she pulled into her driveway.

She shot a quick to Karen (she was too mad at Shawn to send one to him).

Y/N: Hey Karen! Shawn’s not replying to my text. Do you think you could call or text him and tell him I got home safe? Thanks!

She had lied to Karen about Shawn, but what else was she going to do? Tell her boyfriend’s mom that they were fighting?

And then she started thinking. Shawn would never betray her trust like that. He loved her; he probably wasn’t trying to snoop around on her phone. And let’s be honest, if she saw his phone blowing up with texts and there was a girl texting him, she would be worried. Especially if afterwards, he continued to text on his phone for the next twenty minutes.

She felt herself starting to cry and she quickly picked up her phone, calling her mom. “Hey, honey. Is everything okay?”

“No, I think that I ruined the best thing I ever had.”

***

It had been an hour since Y/N had left his house and Shawn had grown anxious. He decided to drive to her house to see if she had made it there okay. He was hoping she had made it back, but if she hadn’t, he hoped to see her car on the side of the road so he could help her. Shawn’s windshield wipers wiped vigorously across the window. He was worried. Y/N hadn’t texted him back and he felt horrible about the way she left his house. He hadn’t even told her he loved her. He drove as fast as he could in the given conditions to her, calling his mom in a panic.

“Mom, I need help! Y/N left my house, and she hasn’t texted me since! What if something happened to her?! Mom I couldn’t live with myself if she got hurt because of something stupid that I did!”

“Shh, Shawn calm down. Y/N texted me and said she was fine. She said you weren’t responding to her texts, what happened?”

“I…really messed up. We got into a fight because, well, someone named Drew was texting her and I got worried. She kept texting someone and was being super secretive about it. I wasn’t trying to come off as possessive, believe me, but-”

“Shawn, I think that if Drew was a big deal in her life, she would’ve told you about him. As for who she was texting all night, it was me. We were discussing things to get you for Christmas. She probably was being evasive because she didn’t want you to find out.”

He felt his heart drop. He was such an idiot. He had reached Y/N’s house by now, and there was at least a foot of snow on her driveway. He didn’t dare pull his car in, opting to leave it on the street.

“I got to go, I’m at her house right now. But gosh, I feel like such an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot because of what you did, but you are an idiot for driving to her house in the middle of a blizzard! I’m not going to lecture you about it right now, but you know better than that! Now I love you, go get your girl back.”

***

He knocked on her door a solid few times before he heard the light padding of her feet. He had never felt more relieved when he saw her on the other side of the door frame. She seemed to have felt the same way because as soon as she saw Shawn, she pulled him into a tight hug.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry! I shouldn’t have left like that! I can’t believe you’re here! Holy cow! Why did you come?! That’s so dangerous, you idiot!”

Shawn chuckled a little and inhaled her scent. “I’m here to explain everything. I felt horrible about the way I let you just walk out of there. I love you and I need to tell you a few things.”

“Then by all means, let’s get you out of the freezing cold.” She pulled him inside and sat him down on her couch, sitting a good distance away from him, which to be frankly honest, hurt Shawn’s feelings.

“I…your phone was blowing up when you went to the bathroom, so I went to turn it off. But then I saw a text from a guy named Drew and it seemed flirtatious and it freaked me out. Because I’m insecure, I’m stupid, and I’m so worried about losing you that I drove you away.”

“You didn’t drive me away. And Drew is just a friend. We used to have something, but now I have you. And by the way, you are like infinitely better than him in every department. He was kind of an airhead. Plus, I thought about the situation, and I probably would’ve freaked out the same way.”

Shawn chuckled. “Well, I hope that means you can forgive me.”

“Shawn, of course I can. But I think you might have to stay the night because there is no way I am letting you back on those roads. I can’t believe you risked driving to my house!” She hit him on the chest, and he grabbed her hand, kissing her knuckles.

“Well, I’ve been wanting to ask you something and I think if you say no, it’s going to be a really long night.” He awkwardly scratched the back of his head.

“Well, that’s alright, as long as you’re safe, I don’t care how awkward the night gets.”

His face heated up and he couldn’t make eye contact with her. “I’ve been thinking…and well…I mean, you have so many clothes at my place, like half your closet,” she chuckled and kissed him on the cheek, “And you also have like…your toothbrush, your shampoo, your hair stuff, and like basically everything that you have here, over there. So maybe, and this is only if you want to, no pressure at all, would you like to move in with me?” He tightly closed his eyes as he said the words.

There was a beat of silence…two…three. “Shawn, this could be a really big step in our relationship. I…wow! Okay, just give me a second to process that.”

He held her hands in his as he watched her face inherit a giant grin all for him. “Yes! Okay, we could definitely do that!” And then she started laughing really hard—like hard, loud, barking laughs—and Shawn joined in. They couldn’t help it. Twenty minutes ago, they had been in a huge fight, but now, they felt closer than ever to each other.

She hugged Shawn tightly and he kissed the top of her head. “So…since we’re going to be stuck here for a while, what do you say we start packing?”

Shawn’s eyes lit up as she smiled up at him. “There’s nothing more in the world that I would want to do with you.”

A/N: I thought I would add some angst to this one since they all have been super fluffy. I really enjoyed writing this and I think it is the longest one so far. Please leave feedback for me and if you have any questions, comments, or concerns, message me about them! Thanks, I love you guys so much!

Taglist: @mendesblurb

Y/N squeezed Shawn’s hand tightly in hers as they walked through the tiny aisles of the plane. Their suitcases dragged behind them as they maneuvered around seats and other people’s luggage. “14, 15, 16a! Found it! Alright babe, do you want the window seat or the aisle seat?”

Y/N clenched her jaw and but the inside of her cheek. She took a few deep breaths before replying,”The window’s great. That okay with you?”

“Of course honey. Here, let me get that for you,” Shawn said as he watched Y/N struggle to put her carry on in the overhead storage unit. He took it from her hands and slid the carry on into the storage, followed by his, before taking his seat next to his beautiful girlfriend of 4 months.

4 months. It had been such a short amount of time and yet, Shawn had already fallen completely in love with her. He met her a few months back at one of the many photo shoots he did. He instantly noticed how beautiful she was and asked her out on a date. And since Shawn had to leave for tour, and one of his photographers has recently quit, he offered her a job on his team.

Now here they were, on there way to Miami where they were going to stay with Camilla Cabello, Shawn’s friend, for a few nights. Shawn had three shows in Miami and they would be staying with Camilla for the duration of that time. To say she was nervous was an understatement. While Shawn had denied ever having feelings for Camilla, she still was one of his very good friends and Y/N hoped she would approve of her.

“You okay, doll?” Shawn asked as he grabbed Y/N’s hand in his. He knew Y/N didn’t really fancy planes. She didn’t mind them once they were in the air, but taking off and landing made her nervous. And to top it all off, any turbulence made her extremely dizzy.

“I’ll be alright.” She whispered as she closed her eyes. It wasn’t just the plane flight that was making her nervous, Y/N was also on her period. And Shawn had never been around for one of her periods yet. He had always been out of town or at the studio all day so he never noticed her lack of energy and moodiness around that time of the month.

“You sure? You don’t seem fine. I’ve never seen you this nervous for a flight before.” Shawn’s voice dripped with concern.

While they had been dating for a while, Shawn was able to read Y/N like an open book and he knew she was hiding something from him, but he didn’t know what. He was just really worried about her.

Y/N on the other hand, had just gotten her period, and she was not in the mood to sit through a 4 hour plane ride while blood leaked from down there.

“I’m just super tired and a little bit jet lagged,” she added a little chuckle in to make it seem like she really was fine. But Shawn could see right through her. He placed the back of his hand on her forehead and felt for a fever. Her forehead didn’t feel hot, so he decided to let it go.

“Alright babe, tell me if you need anything.” Y/N nodded.

After the flight took off and the seat belt light turned off, Shawn lifted the armrest in between Y/N and him and pulled her into his lap, letting her rest her head on his lap. “Try to get some sleep, alright angel?”

She yawned sleepily before cuddling into Shawn’s side. Shawn smiled softly and planted a kiss on her forehead.

***

Camilla was at the airport waiting to take them home. As soon as she saw Y/N she pulled her into a hug, which Y/N gladly returned. “It’s so nice to finally meet you! Shawn has said so much about you!”

“It’s nice to meet you too!” Camilla was about to let Y/N go when Y/N whispered something into her ear. “My period started this morning and luckily there were supplies at the airport, but I don’t have anything else. I wasn’t planning on it starting this early. Also, Shawn doesn’t know.”

“Don’t worry about, I have stuff at home.”

“K, thanks.” Camilla winked at Y/N while Shawn stared confusedly between the two girls. Shrugging it off, he linked his hand through Y/N’s, and followed Camilla out to her car.

***

Once Shawn and Y/N had gotten situated Camilla secretly passed Y/N a tampon which she gladly accepted with a quiet ‘thank you.’ Y/N snuck off to the bathroom as Shawn went to make Y/N and himself a PB and J.

When Camilla walked into the kitchen she took a seat at the bar stool and watched her friend make the two sandwiches. Shawn, being curious as to where his girlfriend went, asked Camilla. “Hey Mills? Where’s Y/N?”

“She’s going to the bathroom, she’ll be back in a minute.” There was silence for a minute as Shawn nodded at Camilla’s words. “You know Shawn, you lucked out. She’s an amazing girl, really. Gorgeous, kind, and not to mention hilarious. You guys are cute and you seem really happy.”

“I am Camilla! Gosh, I’m so happy! I was getting so caught up in my anxiety and stress and then Y/N came along and poof. All my worries are gone. I’m just so happy Camilla! I got the best girl!”

Camilla smiled softly at her friend. “You’re in love with her aren’t you?”

Shawn scratched the back of his neck as he nodded shyly. Yea! I mean how could I not fall in love with her! You know, I…I think she might be the one.”

“That’s great Shawn! I think you need to tell her. I’ve seen the way she looks at you. I’m sure she feels the same way about you.” Shawn nodded his head in agreement.

“Hey guys!” Y/N walked out of the bathroom and waved at the two, taking a seat next to Shawn. She winced a little as a cramp wracked through her lower stomach.

Shawn took note of her pain and shot her a look of concern. “Hey babe! You okay?” Y/N nodded her head. “You sure? You look like you’re in pain.”

“I’m fine Shawn, really. Just have a headache.” Shawn frowned. He knew Y/N was lying, but he didn’t know why. If she was in pain, she should tell him. He just wanted to help her.

“Alright, well let’s get some food in that cute tummy of yours and then I’ll get you some medicine.” Y/N nodded her head taking the sandwich Shawn held out to her, and eating it.

Camilla gave Y/N a sympathetic look, then turned her gaze to Shawn, indicating that he should talk to her and tell her how he feels.

“I’m going to go get in the shower and then afterwards we can head to dinner, yeah?” Camilla questioned to which they both nodded. Camilla walked in the direction of the bathroom while Shawn turned to Y/N.

“So…” he nervously scratched his neck. “What do you think? About Camilla I mean? Because she adores you.”

“I feel the same way about her. She’s been so nice to me.”

“Yeah? I’m glad. Well, anyways, we were talking about something while you were in the bathroom and it reminded me that I wanted to tell you something.” Shawn used lots of hand gestures as he was anxious about what he was about to confess. “It’s just that,” he sighed, trying to find the right words,”Y/N you’re great. No, scratch that, you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me and…”

Shawn continued to talk but Y/N had blocked him out. She was in too much pain from her period. Her cramps had never been this bad before. As Shawn continued talking, she felt herself get dizzier, and dizzier until she passed out, almost falling out of the chair, but Shawn caught her. He placed her gently on the floor before calling for Camilla.

He ran his hands through his hair and checked his pockets for his phone. His eyes felt watery with tears as he stared at his lifeless girlfriend on the floor.

“Babe! Babe! Please, wake up!” He shook her softly, then checked for a pulse. He sighed in relief as he felt the pounding of her heart in her neck.

“Shawn?! What happened?!” Camilla asked coming out of her room.

Shawn had finally found his phone at this point and was dialing 911. “She was fine one second and then her body went limp and—“ Shawn paused for a second and held the phone closer to his ear.

“Hello…my girlfriend passed out…she’s 21…umm no, I don’t think she has any history with passing out before. Hold on a sec…” Shawn placed the phone on his shirt and looked up at Camilla. “What’s your address?”

“2456 West, Palm Tree Road.” She whispered to him.

Shawn told the 911 operator Camilla’s address and he sighed when they hung up on him, saying they would be on their way soon.

Camilla sat next to Shawn as he held Y/N’s hand, waiting for the operators to come. 5 minutes later, there was a knock on the door and Camilla got up to answer it—Shawn refused to leave Y/N’s side.

The ER nurses came into the house with a stretcher. They picked Y/N up and placed her on the stretcher, carrying her out of the house. Shawn followed right behind them until they reached the ambulance. “I’m sorry sir, only family is allowed in the ambulance.”

“But I am family!”

“We’re sorry sir, but the operator told us you were only the boyfriend.”

Shawn was getting angry at this point! He wasn’t going to let his girl go to the hospital by her herself in the ambulance. “Well I meant to tell her fiancé. We got engaged a couple of days ago and the name is taking some getting used to.”

The ER nurse looked to Y/N’s left hand and sighed. “She doesn’t have a ring on her finger. But if you’re so insistent on coming, I guess I’ll let it slide this time.”

Shawn smiled softly at the man and thanked him as he climbed into the back of the ambulance, grabbing onto Y/N’s hand.

***

Shawn tugged on his curls as he watched his girlfriend’s chest slowly rise up and then back down. His cheeks were puffy and red from all the crying he had done. Andrew and Brian had stopped by to visit the full hospital room and so had a few other members of Shawn’s team. Camilla had left about half an hour ago to get some food for Shawn. He had only been there for about two hours, but he still felt like his whole world was flipped upside down.

“Stop pulling on those curls, it’ll ruin them,” he heard a groggy voice come from the bed. He looked up to see Y/N with a droopy smile on her face. An IV drip was hooked up to her arm. She slowly squeezed Shawn’s hand, giving it a gentle pat.

Shawn’s face brightened as he looked at his beautiful, now awake, girlfriend. “Hey baby.” He whispered softly, bringing her knuckles up to his lips and kissing them. “I’m going to call for a doctor so they can finish checking you out and give you clearance to leave.”

Y/N nodded softly before rattling off a bunch of questions. “Why am I here? How long have we been here? Wait?!!! Please tell me you didn’t miss your show! What hap-“

Shawn cut her off with a quick peck on her soft lips before replying to her. “You…well,” he chuckled softly,”baby, you should’ve just told me you were on your period. I was worried about you all day and it’s a relief to know that it’s a natural thing that’s making you sick instead if you having a real illness.”

Y/N blushed. “Is that why I’m here? Because of my…period,” she whispered.

Shawn nodded his head. “Well, maybe it was a good thing you came here because the doctors did some blood work and found out you are anemic. You haven’t been eating enough iron and once you do, you’ll feel so much better.”

“Wow! All this just because I didn’t eat enough salt?” Y/N joked. Shawn planted a kiss on her forehead and chuckled with her.

“Yep, I guess.” There was silence in the room for a few moments before Shawn started talking again. “Why were you embarrassed to tell me you’re on your period? I’m not grossed out by it. It’s just a normal thing. Don’t be scared the next time you’re on it okay? I just want to make you happy, comfortable, and not in pain.”

Y/N grinned at the cuteness of his statement before softly pinching his cheeks. “Do you think you can get a doctor in here so we can leave soon?”

Shawn nodded his head, touching the button on

the side of her bed. “Come here. Come get in,” Y/N said patting the spot next to her in the bed.

Shawn gladly climbed in and wrapped his arms around Y/N—being cautious of the IV poking out of her arm.

***

“Miss L/N?” The doctor asked walking into the room.

“That’s me,” Y/N said as he went to work checking out everything on her, making sure she was okay to go home. “Alright, you’re good to go. But I do have to tell you something about Mr. Mendes here,” the doctor said.

“He tried to convince us he was your fiancé so he could ride in the back of the ambulance with you. He must really love you. Anyways, I’ll leave you guys to it. Feel free to leave at any time.”

Shawn’s face was bright red as the doctor left the room. They hadn’t said the ‘L’ word yet and it made Shawn feel embarrassed that if didn’t come from his mouth first.

Shawn helped Y/N get to the car and get in. “You know everything he said in there was true right? I do love you, angel.” Shawn said as they drove away from the hospital.

“I love you too Shawn.”

They both grinned and as Shawn pulled up to a stoplight, he took the opportunity to pull Y/N into a passionate kiss.