#sham rambles

“Hand on the throttle

Thought I caught lightning in a bottle (post s1 bliss)

Oh, but it's gone again

And it was written (INEFFABLE PLAN MUCH?)

I got cursed like Eve got bitten (do I even have to say sth??)

Oh, was it punishment? (I MEAN C'MON???)

Pad around when I get home

I guess a lesser woman would've lost hope (our ever so optimist)

A greater woman wouldn't beg

But I looked to the sky and said (i would like to spend–– mmmhhh)

Please

I've been on my knees

Change the prophecy

Don't want money

Just someone who wants my company (!!!!!!!!)

Let it once be me (cause gabriel and beelzebub and maggie and nina and–)

Who do I have to speak to (god you listening???)

About if they can redo

The prophecy?" (aka the ineffable plan)

!!!!!!!!IM NOT CRYING YOU ARE!!!!!!!!

I can go on and on about the whole freaking song but especially:

“I'm so afraid I sealed my fate (WITH THAT KISS)

No sign of soulmates (NO FUCKING NIGHTINGALES)

I'm just a paperweight

In shades of greige” (LITERALLY THEM)

and one of the songs that keeps hitting me is ordinary heaven. i have never heard or seen anyone get what marriage or love is like that. feeling sooo fucking grateful to just watch your partner be. just the opportunity of getting to witness them in their element. the disbelief there that this is my life?? she's dancing in our house and I just get to be here? how fucking lucky am I? but also the inner voice that heyyy you better not fuck this up you, better not forget how lucky you are to get to be here. you were scared to even wish for times like this and now that you're here you better not take this for granted.

and thennn jack hits you with the quote from rodney mullen and first of all sonically the way those overlapping vocals sit they just grab your attention in the most gentle way and it's crazy how that outro summarises everything he has said in this album so precisely. and to top that off you have the lore of how jack got to meet his childhood hero via the love of his life and that added connection brings you back to the idea of having this ordinary heaven with your partner and how lucky you are to be in this position!

i'm sham(they/she) - full time consumer of queer media, forever appreciator of fan work and (very rarely) creator of said fan work <3

currently obsessed with: epic the musical, pjotv, riordanverse

fandoms:

the owl house

riordanverse - pjo, hoo, magnus chase, toa

bleachers (band)

I look at 10yr old me researching what trans meant and being confused if that was me or not and now I can tell her that heyyy you're genderqueer!!! you are gender fluid. you are non binary. I look at 13yr old me not understanding people crushing on boys and being obsessed with old heroines instead and now I can tell them that heyyy you're queer!!!!

self discovery is such a beautiful journey and man I'm so glad to be here. never felt more comfortable being myself than now. there's so much more I'm yet to work on but baby steps eh?

to anyone reading this, you are valid and so so loved don't let anyone tell you otherwise<3

there's sth to be said about that feeling of letting it all out. let it pour, let it thunder, let it go. and then just take a deep breath, take in that petrichor, look at the vibrant green leaves, the clean glimmering streets, maybe you'll catch a rainbow and poof–