#self approval

It may happen to use relationships as a way to validate ourselves and our insecurities. This way we turn our people into a source of validation (which they're not), and don't allow ourselves and them to simply connect and enjoy: if they don't behave how we want them to, we may even resent them cause of our emotional trigger and fear. But people is not with us or living to please us. To change this, we should find ways to be more in contact with our own emotional side, more understanding of it, so that whenever we get an insecure feeling (triggered by another person), we don't overreact; we should be more compassionate and not judge ourselves for having those thoughts and being more confident in our own skin whenever we can (at least accompany every negative thought with a more neutral -if not positive- one. E.g. I'm too needy -> but I am also a very kind and giving person so that's actually balancing things out).