ex who lowkey sexually abused me for 5 months just got engaged to someone pretty
professor who thought i was going places definitely thinks i'm wasted potential
i feel like the definition of "you people can't do anything"
i proposed plans in a local queer groupchat but now that people have expressed interest i am so anxious i barely want to go.
paranoia is up and down
mostly i want some people to leave me alone i want other people to stay friendly i want to try writing my book again #mybook i want to get a real job i want to go back to school but without the weird depressive episode that happened earlier this year. i want to feel like at a baseline normal level but i don't think i have ever felt that way in my life.
hey have you guys noticed that i do tend to get crushes on my friends and then have insanely messy friend breakups??? i thought i was being completely unlike myself but i realized i have done this 7(+) times in my life since i was 9 years old GET A GRIP GIRL!!!! i cannot be doing that anymore.
hey have you guys noticed that i tend to center romance and although i had that year where i didn't date i was so lonely the whole time. what's that about.
i don't have anything else to say but 9 is my favorite. number so i didn't want it to end there. ok sorry for journaling into the void luv u <3
