#rosegam

“We can’t keep doing this,” Rose murmured, refusing to remove her face from Gamzee’s chest in order to speak, so the noise came out muffled.

“Done it my whole life,” Gamzee countered, just as softly, blinking slowly and giving one of Rose’s shoulder blades a squeeze. “Ain’t nobody knows as will stop us.”

“It’s not- we shouldn’t-” Rose took a deep breath, “Just because we’re able doesn’t mean we should. I know what an alcohol addiction does to people, remember?”

“Yeah. You’ve told me often ‘nough, smartsis. You ain’t got no wrigglers to be abandoning though, so I ain’t see why it’s any issue.”

“Addictions are persistent, Gamzee,” Rose said, finally turning her head and lifting a hand to thumb idly at the shoulder of his shirt. Gamzee nodded, figuring she was right, both on account of her intellect that far outshone his own and from personal experience.

“This could become lifelong, if I keep doing this, and to this extreme.” Rose chuckled mirthlessly, thoughts turning darker, “I wonder if it would count as Just, my own mistakes catching up to me and finally forcing their consequences.”

“You ain’t gonna die, my heart,” Gamzee assured her easily, finally looking away from the ceiling to nuzzle the top of her head lazily, motions sluggish but warmly affectionate.

“I could. Humans died from alcohol poisoning all the time.”

“You ain’t.”

“Ah, the confidence of the ignorant. Truly, an impenetrable barrier.”

Gamzee kissed her hair, humored but too hazy to laugh. He rather felt like he could fall asleep, if it weren’t for the conversation Rose was so diligently trying to have.

“We’re enabling each other,” she started anew, using that same soft, vulnerable murmur she had begun with. “This isn’t healthy.”

“My motherfuckin’ heart. My most flushed and brilliant of sisters,” Gamzee said pityingly, lifting her chin so he could stare at her eye to drooping eye, “My life ain’t been one of any health but you are never one as to take as such from me.” He kissed her lips softly, his chapped and both painted, and then pulled her closer into a hug, their bodies flopping against each other on the couch in a cat-like liquidity. “My life is better for the fact that you are in it.”

Rose felt her natural desire to avoid her problems win out over the wine + self-loathing induced attempt at productivity, and hugged Gamzee back, clinging tightly to the oversized fabric of his t shirt.

“My life is better for the fact that you are in it, too,” she echoed back at him, pressing her face into the crook of his neck.

“We’re fine, matesprit mine,” Gamzee mumbled in her ear, once again stroking her hair, “Our guardians ain’t what neither of us would call ‘around,’ but we got each other now. We got holes in us where they should’ve filled but all them empty places feel brighter with you, my light aligned lover; their absence ain’t break us half so bad as we feel it did.”

Rose took a deep breath, smelling Gamzee’s scent underneath the overwhelming proof that it had been a long while since he’d last showered, and pulled back to kiss Gamzee. When he kissed her, it was so soft and simple and gentle- always gentle- but when she kissed him it was with two hands of hair and a mouth full of wanting. And Gamzee always gave; he denied her nothing and demanded only her heart for his return.

“We’re fine,” she rasped when they paused for breath. “A little cracked, but we deal with it our own way.”

“Ain’t no way like our way,” Gamzee said amicably, bumping their foreheads and generally pressing his face to hers, even when their mouths were apart. He clung to her like he was starved for it, like each touch was a giftwrapped present she’d deigned to bestow. Close was never close enough, for him, always seeking more parts of their bodies that he might touch together.

“Gamzee,” Rose said softly, and Gamzee smiled up at her.

“I love you,” he said easily, knowing why she could not make herself ask him to remind her, and knowing also why she couldn’t return the words aloud. Atop all that he knew, deep in his bones, that she did love him too, and did not begrudge her the inability to form the words. They’d talked on this, after all, in amongst alcohol and sopor, amongst jokes and banter and wordplay and tears and shaking.

    You have to stop, glancing up at the quiet scraping sound of claws on metal and the jingling of the air vent shutter. This wasn’t the first time he’d made his way into your room. He had been doing this for months, showing up at random, stealing pillows and having brief conversations. On several occasions though, you’d wake up and he’d be sitting there, flipping through one of your books. You never really minded, and after some convincing, he took a seat on the floor in front of your bed and you read to him. He liked that, an awful lot. So much, that he kept coming back. He’d sit on your floor, having picked out a book and there were plenty of nights you’d read until you were both half asleep. One time, he’d even fallen asleep, sitting up on the floor. It was nice to you, a weird friendship, but he trusted you enough that he let down his guard. One morning he even made you breakfast, having sneaked around everyone else. Pancakes and coffee, hot and tasty. You liked that an awful lot, honestly. The food was good and it was a nice thing to wake up too. You sat in bed, blanket over your lap and tray ontop. You sipped your coffee and wished you had worn a bra that night, as he sat on the end of the bed just talking. He talked about a lot of things, rambling on and cursing about the people around him. Sometimes he’d just sit there and watch you, ask you if you liked your food. He would just nod at you when you spoke, he’d let you talk and talk until you were done and he’d just listen. You finally glance up from your knitting, to see him standing there, turned and putting the shutter back on the vent. “Hello there.” You comment, and he tenses and turns, before revealing a smirk. It had a menacing quality to it, like it always did. He was always trying to scare you, like it was his job. It rarely worked though, and you returned a smirk of your own, simple yet intimidating. “Hey there chica.” He appeared, like a blur, next to you before plopping down on the end of the bed. “Whatcha you up and got your magic fingers up to be makin’ right there?” He glanced to the jumble of knitted colors wrapped around the needles in your hands. “I am working on a garment for Kanaya, she mentioned the other day she often gets cold around here and I thought a scarf would be an appropriate gift.” You state, dipping the needle carefully through several holes and pulling it tight. “Someone’s rather swift with their fingers.” Gamzee blinked, watching and admiring how fast your hands moved. It was almost flattering, if the comment didn’t have that perverted hint to it. You arch a brow and give him a glance, before reaching up and tucking a hair behind your ear. “Oh really?” You tilt your head head, just slightly, before allowing your smirk to grow wider and a brow to arch. He blinked and arched a brow of his own. “Yeah, really chica. Why the mother fuck would I be up and makin’ lies?” “Oh, I don’t know.” You shrug and roll your shoulders. “I just thought there I heard a double meaning in your words.” You give him another glance, smirk still in place. “A double meanin’?” His brow arched more, disappearing under a mess of bangs, but the smirk was returned. “I have no idea what you could be up and mumblin’ ‘bout chica. You be gettin’ your words on in a bunch of weird ways, tryin’ to confuse me with your psychic mumbo jumbo, are ya?” He leaned in towards her a bit, hands on his crossed knees, nails drumming against his own skin with a sound more quiet than a whisper. “No, I think you understand exactly what I’m saying and you like to mess with me.” You argue, leaning over to gently set your project down on the nightstand, before sitting up straight and turning to look at Gamzee. “I guess to keep this simple, we both have rather enjoyed one another’s company for some time now, or at least, I know I have.” “Hell yeah chica, be gettin’ my sit on up in this here room with you is fun as shit. I ain’t be gettin’ to go much places ‘round here, but this is definitely one of my more frequent sectors of this here lab we gots ourselves up in.” He shrugged, trying to play his words off as innocent, but he was sure where Rose was going with this. “And you’d agree that we have become rather close, wouldn’t you?” “Pretty much.” Gamzee gave an agreeing nod. “I mean, I up and get my see on to you hella more than any of these other mother fucker’s who be up in here other than Karbro.” “So, would you be willing to say, do me a favor?” You imply, adjusting yourself in your seat, before allowing yourself to look at him again. Gamzee blinked a couple times, confused. “A favor, chica? What kinda things could I all be up and offerin’ to you?”

“Well, I want to try something. If you’re comfortable with it, of course. I would not want to pull you out of your comfort zone.”

  “Shoot.”

  “Scoot closer to me.” You instruct, patting your knees impatiently.

  Gamzee blinked for a long moment, before slowly scooting a bit closer. He watched you for a long moment, before you reached out and placed a hand on his face. He flinched at first, but relaxed. It was odd, having anyone touch him who wasn’t Karkat. Your hand was warm, holding still for a long moment before you move it up into his hair and thread it carefully through the knotted mess. He does his best not to move, watching you cautiously the whole time. After a long moment, you lean in and place your lips to his. They’re cold, like the rest of it, and tastes odd, a combination of dry face paint and Faygo.

  He pulled back after a long moment and you watch him. He seems to be judging the moment, wonderful what just happened and what it meant. You didn’t want it to mean anything, honestly. You just wanted him to stop thinking, for yourself to stop thinking. You wanted this to happen, despite the consequences, despite the problems it caused. You just wanted this.

  “What kinda of favor are you up and tryin’ to yank from me, chica?”

  “Well, as you both know, I guess we are both considered teenagers, and we have higher hormonal levels than other people of different age groups and-”

  “Chica, I ain’t up and sure what you’re gettin’ your mouth flaps on ‘bout, but if you’re sayin’ we should fuck, let’s just do it.”

  “Well that was easy.”

  “Well you basically just deemed the lot of us a bunch of horny mother fuckers who don’t want to be up and keepin’ it in our pants, and well chica, it’s a thousand shades of the fuckin’ truth.”

  You nod, before looking at him again. “So, how was we going to go about doing this?”

  “I guess we just.. Get naked and do it? I dunno.”

  You sigh and change positions, getting on your knees on the bed and placing a hand on each shoulder. You lean in, locking lips with him and sliding your fingers over his shoulders and onto his back. You sigh into the kiss as his claws gently rake down your sides, arching into his touch.

  “Don’t rip these.” You warn, not wanting him to damage your god tier pajamas. You had alchemized several pairs, but you weren’t too keen on having any of them damaged.

  “No promises.” He muttered back with a chuckle, lifting you a bit so he can shift his weight, now hovering over top of you. You slide a leg around him, tongue sliding over his bottom lips hotly, fingers yanking his hair by the roots. There was so much of it, you were sure he could fit a couple small animals in there.

  Your fingers slide under his shirt, and he pulls back to yank it over and off of himself. He slides his fingers under the collar of your pajamas, yanking them down so he can run his tongue over your collar bone, a gasp escaping your lips. “Just take it off,” you whine and give his hair another yank. You aren’t in the mood for any of this teasing bullshit, you want him, and you want him right now.

  He simply laughs at you, trailing his kisses down. They were too cold, and too light through the fabric to please you. You sigh, annoyed and moved, gripping his horns tightly. “What did I just say?”

  He shuddered, the rush of warm on his horns sending a shudder through him. “I’m up and gettin’ there.” He murmured, hands sliding down, trailing up the side of your thighs, before sliding under the top of your pajamas, pushing them up. He kissed up your stomach, sucking on patches of skin along the hem of your tights. He pulls back after a couple more kisses, sitting you up some to yank your top off completely. He stops, glancing at your bra for a long moment, before looking at your face. “Get rid of that shit, it’s harder to undo then one of those colorful cubes you have to be up and twistin’ to solve or some shit. Why can’t the cube just be as many mother fuckin’ jumbled up colors as it all kinds of pleases?”

  You have to stare at him for a long moment. Is he really going on about rubix cubes? When you’re half naked? You sigh, loudly and reach behind you to undo your bra before tossing it to the side, and his lips are on you again. You let out a quiet gasp, closing your eyes and letting him lay you back down as he nips and sucks at every patch of skin his lips can find, rolling your nipples inbetween his lips and teeth, tongue sliding, cold and wet, over the sensitive flesh. ‘Oh god..” You whine, fingers knotting in his hair as his lips moved back downwards.

  “I didn’t think ‘bout this chica, but the anatomy might be some weird kinda different.”

  “As long as you have something to stick in me, I don’t care if it bites.”

  Gamzee had to laugh at that, sliding his fingers under the hem of your tights and pulling them down and off of your legs. He crawls back up, locking lips with you again, sliding his tongue into your mouth without hesitation and allowing it to wrestle with yours. He slid his splayed out fingers down your stomach, and you bit your leg as they slid between your thighs. You let out a quiet moan, his fingers rubbing against your intimates in the best way. The friction of your cotton panties has never been appreciated more. You cling to him, him teasing and rubbing and licking at every part of you he can get his hands on

  “Please just use your tongue..” You finally mutter, and he glanced at you for a moment, before smirking and backing off of you, scooting closer to the end of the bed. He slipped his cold fingers over your hips, before moving to yank your underwear down and off. He inspects you for a long, self-conscious moment, before kissing your kneecap and trailing his tongue up your thigh. You shudder, watching him through half lidded eyes as his mouth reached your crotch, cold tongue sliding between the wet lips and over your clit. You shuddered, leaning your head back to gasp a bit. “God, yes, right there.” You mutter to her, and he continued, repeating that action, tongue toying and swishing around your clitoris in a way that was driving you wild. Shudders wracked your body, causing your back to arch and your toes to curl. You bucked your hips against his licks, fingers gripping his horns tightly. He pulled back too soon, yanking the rest of his own clothes off.

  You didn’t think he could get any more attractive, but you were so wrong. As he slid his pants down, that long and thick, slightly-purple tentacle caught your eye, curling and uncurling, desperate to be touched. You stare for a long time, before letting a smirk touch your lips. “You should’ve told me.”