#rogers!reader

You stared at your phone, the video stopped on a frame of the shield covered in blood. Your father’s shield, covered in blood. Covered in the blood of someone who was pleading for their life. It didn’t matter to you that they were a Flag Smasher. They were a fucking person.

Ice ran through your veins, a deathly chill capable of putting out the bonfire in front of you.

The one symbol of hope, the one piece of your father that you thought would keep a flame of his comfort burning in the world, was now smothered to nothing but bloodied ashes. His memory, his legacy, was now tainted. 

Swallowing the bitter taste of alcohol rising back up in your throat, you quietly excused yourself from the group.

You knew Omaha was watching you the whole time you trekked up the beach, your phone fighting for its life in your hand. He was going to give you your space, give you a moment to let yourself be angry and let it out before trying to console you. You needed a minute to be angry alone, then you both could be angry together.

He kept his eyes on you the whole time though, even as your face was illuminated by your phone screen as you called Sam.

You tried to take deep, calming breaths as you waited for Sam to pick up. 

It was morning time in Latvia, so you knew he would be awake. And if he wasn’t, you’d happily be his wake-up call.

Your thumb tapped on your fingers, index finger to pinky and back again, while your exhales fell out of trembling lips. You couldn’t puke. You weren’t going to puke. This was not the time to throw up. 

Saliva built up in your mouth, and your lips began to feel sticky – a tell-tale sign that you were probably going to vomit. Your stomach churned as you felt the buzzing heat of your nerves roll over your skin. 

You hated puking; you didn’t do it often. It was hard for you to get sick, and the serum also helped you to keep from puking after being in your plane. So, you being over the toilet or a trash can expelling the contents of your stomach wasn’t an event you experienced regularly. When it did happen, you were absolutely miserable.

You spit the built-up saliva out into the sand, your hand resting over your stomach as you hummed to try and ward away the nausea. 

Pick up the damn phone, Wilson, you thought as you closed your eyes and exhaled, head tilting up toward the navy blue sky.

Finally, just as you were about to hang up and try again, he answered, his tone already pleading and desperate.

“I know-” 

“What. The. Fuck did he do?” 

Sam’s words went unheard by you as you cut him off, hissing harshly into the receiver.

Anger and frustration rose up in place of the bile and alcohol that had been in your throat moments ago. Your words pushed the nausea out of the way.

Was your anger misplaced? You didn’t think so.

He promised you that he would keep John in line. Keep your father's legacy intact despite the catastrophe tasked with carrying it on. Sam gave you his word that he wouldn’t let Walker ruin it. 

And now, for John to go and do this? With Sam doing nothing to stop him?

As far as you were concerned, your anger towards him was justified.

“Y/N-”

“No, Sam! Don’t ‘Y/N’ me! What the hell happened?”

You weren’t about to let Sam try to calm you down. That wasn’t his place. Not after he failed to do the one thing he said he would.

Sam sighed, and the weight of it dampened the ringing in your ears slightly, a realization hitting you.

Sam was there. He watched it and everything that led up to it. He was just as angry about this situation as you were, not to mention the guilt and regret that probably weighed on his shoulders now, too.

Had your emotions jumped the gun? Did you lash out at Sam too quickly?

Despite that revelation there were things you couldn’t let go, justifications you were too stubborn to let go of. Stuck on his broken promise.

“Lemar Hoskins is dead. Karli killed him during a fight…”

Your heart sank.

You met Lemar once. It was before you left for the mission and only for a few minutes, but he seemed like such a sweet guy. He was there to support John and have his back; he was being a good friend.

And look where that got him…

You crossed your arm over your chest, your free hand gripping your bicep as your jaw clenched. “That’s-that’s unfortunate… but that doesn’t justify murder.”

“No, it doesn’t.”

“He didn’t even kill Karli. Flag Smasher or not, that man was innocent.” You dug your foot into the sand, “He didn’t deserve to die.”

The ringing in your ears came back as the quiet slowly took over the call, Sam’s end unnervingly bare of words. Your jaw ticked in the silence, anger flaring up in your stomach. 

You finally broke it, letting yourself ask:

“Why didn’t you stop him? How could you allow this to happen?”

“Oh no, no, no, no. You’re not about to blame me for this,” Sam responded, his tone defensive and sharp.

Your free hand flew out to the side, your own defensiveness coming to light.

“You promised me, Sam! You gave me your word!”

In the midst of your shouting and arm flailing, you didn’t think about the possibility of there being people nearby. Nor did it occur to you that the scene you were making might make them uncomfortable – but, honestly, you didn’t really care.

“Don’t you think I would have stopped him if I could’ve? You really think that I just stood there and let him take an innocent life?”

The wild arm fell limp and slapped against your thigh, a huff escaping your lips. “Sam–”

“No, Y/N, it’s my turn to talk. While I understand your anger towards me, hell I’m angry towards me, but just give me a chance to explain. Please.”

You chewed on the inside of your cheek, your knee bouncing as you looked at the sand, “Okay… tell me what happened.” Your voice was a little softer, not as brassy or harsh, but still firm.

Sam let out a breath, taking a moment to collect the right words.

“After the fight, we all just scattered. Bucky and I got separated from John, and… by the time we got there, we were too late.”

You stayed quiet, your tongue swiping over your teeth as you let Sam continue.

“He ran off after he realized what he had done… Bucky and I went after him, tracked him down to an abandoned train station. When we got there, we confronted him and tried to get the shield back civilly, but John’s pride got in the way… it got ugly, but we got the shield back. It’s with me right now.”

You nodded, your thumb popping your fingers at your side as you drew in a breath. 

“What about Walker?” You need to change the focus, your tongue redirecting itself to form the question rather than the comment it really wanted to say.

“What do you mean?” Sam was clearly confused by the shift, but he welcomed it internally.

“Where is John, Sam?”

“They- His handlers, I guess is what they are, took him back to the States. Probably will have a hearing in a few days…” He trailed off, now wondering why you wanted to know Walker’s whereabouts. “What are you planning, Star?”

“Don’t worry about it, Wilson,” you snapped.

“Y/N–”

“You can’t stop me, Sam. Don’t try–”

“Walker took the serum, Y/N.” Your brow furrowed for a second as you processed the words Sam had interrupted you with, and the second you did – it felt like your organs turned to lead.

John Walker was a Super Soldier now? That’s just… fucking great and definitely not a huge problem for you.

You groaned a little and rubbed your forehead after you recovered from the slight shock, “I’m still going to confront him. I can’t sit in fucking silence about this. Not now…”

“And I don't expect you to. But you needed to know what you were walking into.”

You swallow and nod, “Well, thank you for that. I’ll umm.. I’ll keep that in mind.” After another beat of silence, Sam sighed a little, “Look, Y/N, we–”

You shook your head, “Later, Sam, this… this is not a conversation I want to have over the phone with just you. Bucky needs to be in on this, too.”

“Right, right, of course.” 

You nodded and shook out your hand, “Bye, Sam.”

“Talk later, kid.”

After hanging up, you rubbed your face before shoving your phone in your pocket and walking toward the shore.

You needed a second to breathe. You just got back from a high-stress mission, and now Walker has desecrated the only thing left of your father in this world that people put meaning to. And you knew that by tomorrow morning, newspapers, magazines, and the news reporters would be on your ass trying to get a statement.

Were you going to respond? Hell no. Why? Because you didn’t need your words twisted and thrown out into the world for people to use for their own agenda.

But you would deal with that in the morning. Right now, you just need to think and take a breath.

A chilled, salty breeze cooled your heated skin and brought notice to the hot tears of frustration on your cheeks.

“Shit,” you mumbled as you wiped them from your face. “Get it together, Rogers..”

“Honey,” Neil said gently to announce his presence before he touched your shoulders. 

You sucked in a breath, “‘m fine, baby…” He shook his head and turned you to face him, “No, Star-light, you’re not.”

More tears sprung to your eyes, and you looked down in an attempt to fight them off. “No, Neil, I’m f-”

He tilted your chin up, “Stop lying to yourself. You’re not okay, you’re pissed. You have every right to be upset.” His thumb reached up to swipe a tear away, “Please don’t hold it in…”

Your lip quivered, and you inhaled sharply, shaking your head, “I have to be strong. I can’t fucking cry just because I’m angry.” You pulled back a little and harshly wiped your eyes, not missing the look on your boyfriend’s face. 

You knew he was just looking out for you and you knew he was right. But you had a mission and you needed to focus. You could break down later – breaking down would cause you to shut down, and you didn’t have time to shut down.

Omaha sighed and helped wipe away the tears that escaped, “Sweetheart, you shouldn’t hold this in – it’s okay to cry…” He held your shoulders and looked into your eyes, “Scream, yell, cry, punch something-”

“Neil, I appreciate this, all of it. I do. But you just don’t understand what’s going on in my brain and in my heart right now.”

“Then help me understand. I want to be there for you.”

You sighed sadly, “I wish I could explain it, but I can’t. And you are here for me, Neil. Because you’re who I’m gonna fall on when the weight of this crashes down on me, you are going to be my rock.” You cupped his face in your hands, “You are my rock. I just… I need to face this first.”

He nodded and kissed your palm before kissing your fingertips as he moved one of your hands to his chest. “I love you, Star-light.” You smiled softly at him, “I love you too, Oma.” 

Omaha kissed your forehead before wrapping his arms around you, “You wanna head home?” You sniffled and nodded against his neck, “Please, if I stay, I’m afraid I’ll ruin the mood…” He nodded and rubbed your back, “C’mon Doll, let’s go home. I’ll send someone a text and let them know what’s goin’ on.”

You nodded and pulled back from the hug but stayed tucked under his arm as you both walked to Neil’s Jeep.

The ride home was nearly silent. The only sound in the Jeep was the radio, which had been turned down as low as it could go while still being audible.

Your left hand was threaded with his right one, your thumb pressing down on his knuckle like a button. The tip of his thumb moved up and down, letting itself be manipulated. Neil always made sure to keep his hand loose and moveable when you were tense or anxious. He knew how little control you felt you had in this situation, how you felt like the entire universe was crashing down on you, and you had nothing to get the pieces back in their rightful place.

So he could give you this. He could let you squeeze and press and twist and pull, trace whatever lines or patterns you needed to to ease your nerves. To let you feel in control of something.

Omaha knew better than to ask you questions. Your conversation with Sam was a private thing and something that you would talk to him about when you were ready. He didn’t need to push you for information or to talk about your feelings right now, and he trusted that if it was something you thought he needed to know, you would tell him.

That trust didn’t stop him from worrying, though.

He could handle your anxious silence. He understood it. But that doesn’t mean he liked it. 

He knew that your mind wasn’t putting together coherent thoughts, each one overlapping the next until it was just a cacophony of things that overwhelmed you to the core. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the tears in your lash line, welling up and making your eyes glossy. They beaded up on your eyelashes like dew on blades of grass in the morning. They gorgeously reflected any light that they could catch – the moonlight, streetlights, headlights of the few cars that passed you. But you didn’t let them roll over, catching them on the back of your finger before they had the chance.

Your chest stuttered softly with your shaky inhales, something he would have never noticed if he hadn’t learned all of your habits over the course of your five-year relationship. You tried to keep your breathing soft and controlled, quiet enough so you didn’t worry Neil. 

He’d also catch you attempting to pick at your lips, squeezing your hand every once in a while to divert your attention and let you know that he saw you. Usually, you’d give him an absent-minded squeeze back, and your hand would move to your chest, your thumb rubbing against the words scribbled across your collarbone and your heart thumping against it in time with the pulse he could feel against his own wrist.

He almost didn’t want to go home. He could sit in silence in the car, drive around for hours in this silence. In this silence, you were right next to him, holding his hand. This silence wasn’t despair; it wasn’t as heartbreaking as the silence at home.

At home… at home, you had more room to be distant. You had space to be alone, away from him. He understood that you needed space, but he hated it when you would isolate yourself in your own home. You’d tuck yourself into the corner of the couch and just try to figure it out by yourself. You’d completely detach yourself and go into focus mode, locking on to figuring out how to fix this situation – one that couldn’t really be fixed.

When he finally decided to pull into the house, you didn't do what he expected. Omaha expected you to yank your hand from his and bolt into the house to find a corner to hide in.

But you didn’t.

Instead, you swallow, sniffling slightly as you turn from the window to face Neil. He squeezed your hand, letting you know he was still there and he wasn’t going anywhere without you.

“I’m going to DC…”

You didn’t look up at him as you spoke, afraid you’d break if you looked into his eyes. His kindness and understanding swam in them, conveying his feelings so his words never had to. And they were your safe place.

His eyes were kaleidoscopes of colors. The light manipulated them beautifully, capturing each shade in its individuality and in their unity. They were gorgeous. They were home.

They could be the soft dirt, warm, comforting, and inviting – ready for something to hold. Or they were the grass or the trees, fields and forests of serenity and calmness – a place you could find peace. Or they were the sky or the ocean, two of the greatest expanses on earth – a place you felt in control and a place that showed you just how delicate you could be, a place you could relax and let go.

They were all of those things…

They were Neil.

You squeezed his hand, grounding yourself with the chill of his skin against the heat of yours. You took a deep breath, tracing the veins on the back of his hands to focus.

“You-you don’t have to come with me. This is last minute, and we just got home, but–”

“Star-light, I’m going with you. Whether it’s to be your support, your back up, or your alibi – I’m going.”

He knew that you weren’t asking his permission to go to DC, nor were you really asking him to go with you. But he was going. He wasn’t letting you go all the way across the country alone. He’d stay at the hotel or in the Airbnb if you wanted, but he was going to be within reach of you – that was non-negotiable. 

“I… This isn’t going to be some fun trip. I think you know why I’m going… So I want you to think about this.”

Neil didn’t need to know and he wasn’t going to ask questions, either. You would tell him why, probably were about to, before he interrupted you. And he could only assume it had to do with that video and your phone call with Sam. 

“I don’t need to. When it comes to you, to this, I’m going to be by your side. You want to face John, let him know that you know what he’s done and that he fucked up. I’m just gonna be there so you don’t get yourself hurt or in trouble.”

He squeezed your hand again, “I’m your partner, your wingman. I am here for you, whenever you need me.”

He watched your face carefully as he spoke, catching the quirk of the corners of your mouth before you sobered up and nodded.

“I’ll um… I’ll get the tickets after we get inside. They’ll be shitty, but they’re last minute…”

“As long as they’re next to each other, I don’t care.” 

And that was true. He didn’t care where you sat in the plane – just that you sat together. He wanted – no, he needed to be next to you. Being there for you is his priority right now.

You swallowed and nodded once more, caging his hand between yours.

“I will do my best.” 

He hated how quiet your voice was. It wasn’t a normal quiet. It was meek and powerless. You sound defeated and scared. 

You were none of those things. And seeing you this way broke his heart.

His free hand moved to the back of your head, pulling you toward him gently as he leaned in. He pressed his lips to your forehead, eyes closing as he tried to pour every ounce of love and comfort he could muster into it.

And it seemed to transfer.

Your shoulders relaxed as he felt your shaky exhale brush the skin of his neck.

His eyes stayed closed as he spoke against your skin, “I love you, Star-light.” 

You nodded against his lips, feeling comfort in your chest at the vibration of his low voice against your forehead. His voice was smooth with a slight rasp, similar to warm dark chocolate with a shot of whiskey mixed in – it was just… peaceful.

It took over the other voices that were shouting in your head. All it took was the low whisper of those four words to dampen the screaming. Those voices were still there, but Neil’s made its presence known, and that was enough to get them to back off a little.

“I love you too, Oma. So so much…”

Your voice was still soft, but there was a strength that returned to it. It sounded fuller, not as hollow as it had before.

Omaha wasn’t sure how long that would last, but he would take the win.

He pulled back after pressing another kiss to your forehead, and his hand moved to the side of your neck, his thumb caressing your jaw. “Let’s go in. We need some sleep so we can get up and pack.” 

You nodded, inhaling deeply to ground yourself before exiting the safety of the Jeep.

Neil smiled softly at you, hoping to get you to smile back. And you did… But he knew that you’d done it out of reflex rather than because you felt like smiling.

You turned your head and kissed the palm of his hand, squeezing the one you were holding before you pulled away completely and got out of the Jeep. 

He sighed as your door shut, and he unbuckled himself, getting out to meet you at the front door.

After getting inside, you silently moved around the house. 

Both of you had already rinsed your legs and feet of sand and emptied your shoes before leaving, so you didn’t have to worry about that at all. So, you just quietly went to the kitchen and got your laptop before you walked towards your bedroom.

“Hey,” Neil said, gently catching your arm as you walked past him. “I’m gonna take a shower before I go to bed. Do you want-”

“I’ll shower after you. I want to make sure I get these tickets ordered, and that I can snag a decent flight time. I’m hoping there’s still some left for this morning.” Your voice was breathless, almost as if you had been holding your breath as you moved through the house. The words sounded rushed and rehearsed like you had been waiting for him to ask. Your mind was already set on showering separately.

All Omaha could do was nod. He could try to convince you to join him, tell you he’d wait for you to order the tickets – but your mind was made up. 

“Alright, I’ll be quick.” 

“You don’t have to. Take as long as you need.”

Something in your voice and the way your eyes looked down at where his hand gripped your bicep made his stomach feel heavy. 

You were reverting again. Going back to that corner he thought he had pulled you away from. Isolating yourself again when he was right there. 

He was right there. 

All you had to do was just let him sit with you. Or take his hand and let him pull you up. 

You would talk to him when you were ready. He knew that. But he didn’t like that you were trying to face this all on your own because you felt like you were alone. You weren’t. 

He was right there.

But he nodded, knowing if he pushed, you would back away or lash out like a scared and wounded animal. The opposite of what he wanted. “Alright…”

You gave him another closed-mouth smile and kissed his shoulder before settling in the bedroom.

He rubbed his face, a frustrated sigh left his lips before he shook his head to himself and went to the laundry room to toss two towels into the dryer before grabbing a clean one for himself.

Walking into the bedroom, he saw you sitting on top of the covers with your laptop on your desk tray as you bit your nails. He sighed sadly and walked over, grabbing a piece of gum from your vanity on the way. 

He moved your hand away from your mouth, his grip gentle on your wrist as he held out the gum to you.

No words needed to be exchanged, just a silent moment between you both before he left you alone on the bed to take his shower.

Neil stood under the stream, the hot water drenching his hair and running down his face. 

He avoided his music, knowing that it would do nothing to change his mood. He needed the silence – bask in the steam and the rhythmic beating of water on the titles around him. 

His head fell back, letting the water pelt him in the face as he took deep breaths. In front of him, his hands balled into fists when he inhaled and relaxed as he exhaled. 

Neil needed this. He needed this moment, to be alone and vulnerable behind the closed door – out of your sight. 

There was irony in it; he knew that. The irony when he ran off to hide in the safety of the bathroom so you didn’t have to see him break. Didn’t have to watch him replay every moment over and over in his head. You were going through enough, and he wasn’t about to let you see his hurt or his worry just yet. This wasn’t about him, and he wasn’t going to make it about him.

So, that’s why he was here, standing under the showerhead with his eyes closed, the events on the beach replayed behind his eyelids like a movie.

******

His stomach churned as he watched the video from over your shoulder. The pleads of the young man not going unheard. Then, the sickening crack of the shield being driven into his chest. He heard it again and again… and again. 

John Walker murdered someone. And the whole world saw it.

Rage drove up in his throat, slamming on the brakes and leaving a disgusting burnt taste on his tongue. 

It was almost a metallic taste, a morbid mimicry of the paused frame that lit up your features. 

Your expression seemed blank, shocked at the horrendous act. But your eyes told a different story. 

As they scanned over your phone screen, Neil could see the pain creep in. He watched them crack, breaking as they reflected the blood-stained shield.

Your nose twitched subtly as your lip quivered. He glanced at your hands, noticing how they shook slightly. He doubted that you noticed the tremor, just staring with unblinking eyes at your phone.

“Honey…” 

He wanted to get your attention but not startle you. Your fellow pilots began to stare, concern and pity etched on their faces. He needed to get you out of this, pull you away from the prying eyes and the inevitable questions they would bombard you with.

The squad would try to coddle you. Tip-toe around subjects to try not to make you cry. Or ask invasive questions that you weren’t ready to answer. They meant well, sure, but it wouldn’t help you. It wouldn’t make this situation better. Nothing would…

“Doll-”

You swallowed, your hands dropping to your sides as you excused yourself to trek up the sand wanting a moment alone. Your arm flexed as you had a death grip on your phone.

“Omaha, I didn’t-”

“I know, Garcia,” Neil mumbled as he turned to keep an eye on you, his back to the bonfire. “I know.”

He kept his eye on you as you talked on the phone, most likely with Sam or Bucky, as the others tried to continue on with the party. 

He watched your hands and your legs, noticing the near-perpetual bouncing of your left leg. 

Neil hated this. Hated just standing here, just being some witness to the damage John’s actions caused. His emotions were collateral damage, only worsening with each minute he watched you stand there in pain.

He couldn’t hear much, distant hissing and muffled sentences mostly. But then he heard you shout, your arm flying out to the side.

“You promised me, Sam! You gave me your word!”

His heart shattered. Even from this distance, he could hear how broken your voice was, how it was strained with unshed tears.

He felt his nose burn, sniffling on reflex as he rubbed it with his index finger. 

“Vikander? You alright?”

Omaha hummed absent-mindedly in response, not processing the question or the voice that asked it. 

“Neil, hey, are you okay?”

The hand on his shoulder pulled his attention from you, making him suck in a breath out of surprise. “What?”

Bob shot him a concerned look, “Are you okay? You looked like you zoned out for a second.” 

*****

His conversation with Bob is a blurry memory.

All he remembers is taking his eyes off you for what felt like a second to talk to Bob and take a sip of the water offered to him. By the time he turned back around to check on you, you had walked down to the shore.

He felt his stomach sink again as he remembered how your arms had been wrapped around your waist, how your shoulders moved up and down with your deep breaths. And how when he approached you, you scolded yourself for crying as you tried to subtly wipe at your tears.

You tried to lie and say you were fine, hiding your tears when he pushed you ever so slightly. You pushed back, dismissed your own feelings and held your hurt in. 

Neil’s tears mixed with the water running down his face.

But he didn’t care that he was crying. He didn’t care that he was crying over something he couldn’t fix. Something that was tearing you apart from the inside out, but you hid from him – hid from yourself. You were hurting, and it hurts him that you don’t think you can be vulnerable.

So, he didn’t care that he was crying because it was you – he loves you that much.

His shower was a little longer than normal, but he didn’t think you would really mind right now. 

He just went through his routine on autopilot as his mind wandered and raced, recapping the evening. He ended it with a cold shot, letting the freezing water cool his heated skin and hopefully soothe his aching heart.

Omaha got out and dried off, moving languidly as he kept zoning out.

He wasn’t sure what state he would find you in when he walked into the bedroom. That scared him. This whole situation scared him because he had no idea what to expect next. He didn’t know what you were going to do when you got to DC or when you saw John Walker. 

It all just made him uneasy. 

But he knew that he just had to trust you. Though he wasn’t going to abandon his concerns if he felt that something was dangerous. He’s your partner; your safety matters to him.

After he dried off and got dressed in his boxers and Navy shirt, he exited the bathroom as he ran the towel over his hair.

“You might want to give it a minute or two. Let the hot water replenish a little,” he said as nonchalantly as possible.

He didn’t hear a response, so he looked up to catch the tail end of your nod. 

“I got the tickets order. Flight leaves at about ten in the morning,” you responded softly, picking at your lip as you looked at your computer screen. “Um, San Diego International is the airport. It’s the closest but we’ll need to get up earlier so we can pack.”

Neil tried not to sigh out loud at your subject change. He knew you weren’t doing it on purpose; you were just trying to keep what you could in line and control whatever you could. He also knew the frustration in him wasn’t caused by you. 

He nodded and sat on your side of the bed, trying not to look at your computer screen knowing he would find articles about John on your screen.

“Baby,” he called softly, hoping you would look up at him. When you didn’t, he repeated the nickname: “Baby, please look at me.” 

When your eyes remained glued to your screen, he closed the laptop and grabbed your desk tray, moving it to your actual desk.

“Okay, no, you’re not gonna do that.”

“Neil-”

“No, Y/N,” he pushed, sitting in front of you. “You can’t do that because it is not going to help. You are just going to go further and further down a hole that I can’t pull you out of.”

He grabbed your hands, knowing that you would try to run away if he didn’t. “I get that you're frustrated. That you’re pissed off. I get it, baby. But reading articles that are full of more opinions than they are fact is not going to help you.”

You swallowed and looked at him, “People think he was justified…”

His heart shattered right then in his chest. Your defeated and tear-filled voice crashed into it, sending shards of his heart into his throat.

“How could they find murder justified? John had no right-” He stopped mid-sentence when he noticed that you weren’t looking at him. 

He cupped your chin, turning your head back to look at him and moving his hand to your cheek when you did. “That man did not deserve to die. Flag Smasher or not, he did not deserve that. John had no right to kill him.”

“Nico…”

He looked at you, confused. “What?”

Tears filled your eyes, your voice coming out in a soft whimper. “His name was Nico…”

“Sweetheart…”

“He was murdered… All because he wanted to help people. That’s all they want to do is help people, Neil.” Your voice cracked as he watched anger fill your eyes, “He left behind two sisters… Two girls who watched their brother get murdered. They got notified of his death through fucking social media. His murder is viral.” 

He stayed quiet, letting you go until you stopped yourself – willing to listen as long as you got your feelings out to him.

“Sure, the Flag Smashers methods aren’t ethical, and Karli hasn’t been a saint. But they’re the only ones actually willing to do anything to help those people. The GRC isn’t doing shit!”

He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t think there was much he could say. 

You pulled your hand from his, rubbing your face harshly. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. That… I didn’t mean to blow up on you like that.”

Neil shook his head immediately, resting his hand on your knee. “No, don’t apologize. You don’t have to bottle it up.” 

You gave him a weak smile, resting your hand on top of his. He smiled back at you reassuringly before he turned his palm up and kissed your hand.

You just sat like that for a moment. Your hand in his as the water rolled off his dark hair and onto the duvet, letting the silence settle between you for a moment.

“They think he’s justified because Lemar was killed during a fight… They see it as retribution for that,” you said softly after a few minutes while you played with his fingers. 

Omaha shook his head and opened his mouth to say something, but you continued.

“It wasn’t even Nico that killed Lemar. Karli was…”

He squeezed your hand, “So then it’s not retribution. And one injustice does not fix another.” 

You shook your head, looking down at your joined hands. “It doesn’t…”

A tear hit Neil’s hand, making his heart break – again. But he didn’t make a huge scene. He didn’t point it out. All he did was reach out and gently wipe the tear from your cheek. “Why don’t you go shower, Star-light? The water pressure is nice, and it should all be warmed up now. I’ll heat up your towel and hair towel in the dryer. What do you want to wear to bed?”

You sniffled and leaned into his hand. “One of your oversized shirts and a pair of your boxers, please.” He nodded and kissed your forehead, “You got it, doll.”

“Thank you, Oma, really.”

“You don’t gotta thank me,” he squeezed your hand. “Just go take a shower, relax. I’ll be out here if you need me.”

You nodded and gently pecked his lips, “I love you.” He kissed you back, “I love you too.”

Taking a deep breath, you got up and went to the bathroom, leaving Neil on the bed.

He sat on the bed and waited to hear you turn the shower on before he started moving around the room.

After grabbing the clothing items you asked for and his phone, he went to the laundry room.

He sighed heavily as he tossed the clothes in with the towels and started the dryer, hoping that they would be warm by the time you were done in the shower.

“Okay, now what to–”

Mid-sentence, Neil’s phone started ringing. He didn’t need to check the caller ID to know who it was.

“Hey Bob…” He answered, his voice flat to try and conceal the relief of someone to talk to.

“Hey, I was just calling to check-in. See how you both were holdin’ up.”

Neil sighed, his arm crossing over his chest as he leaned against the washing machine. “Honestly? Not great. I um… I caught her looking at articles.”

Bob inhaled sharply on the other end of the phone, “That’s not good…”

“No, no, it’s not… There are so many who agree with John’s actions and others that don’t. But they’re all just opinions. No one is going to know all the facts. They only know what they saw in that video. And what they saw was John murder someone with the shield in the middle of the town square.”

Omaha harshly ran his teeth over his bottom lip, “I don’t know what to do, Bob. She’s hurting, and she won’t talk to me. She’s said a few things, but the closest I got to her emotions was her voice… Then she fucking apologized for talking about it. What do I fucking do?”

“What you’re doing, Neil. Being there for her. Sometimes, that’s all you can do.”

“That’s not enough!”

“Neil, I know you’re angry…”

That was the understatement of the century. 

Neil was pissed. Someone hurt you. Someone’s careless and selfish actions have hurt you – again.

Someone has taken you from him. Their actions have caused you to internalize your feelings and put your guards up all over again. Making you hide from your safe places.

And that started a fire in him.

“I’m more than angry, Robert. She is hurting. She has to mourn the memory of her father after mourning him the first time!”

Neil tends to hold resentment towards the one that hurt you, Bob knew that. He still holds resentment towards your dad for what he did to you. No one will get away with trying to smother out his Star-light.

And now John was at the top of his list. 

“Walker had no right to murder that man – even if he were to be the one to kill Lemar. Retribution or not, it’s still fucking murder. And John won’t get away with this.”

Neil couldn’t give less of a fuck if he was Captain America or not. John wasn’t getting away with hurting you or disrespecting something that held so much meaning for you.

Bob sighed again, most likely putting his glasses on his head to rub his eyes. “Omaha, you know she won’t want you to get involved in this… She’s keeping things to herself for a reason. And while you don’t like it, she’s protecting you and herself by doing that.”

“I just want to be there for her. I want her to come to me so she doesn’t face this on her own,” Neil’s voice cracked as tears slipped down his cheeks. “I want to be her safe place again…”

“That is never going to change, Neil. Never. You will always be her safe place. And she knows that when she is ready, she can run to you, and you’ll be there with open arms. She just needs to process this on her own… give her time.”

Neil nodded, wiping his eyes harshly as he tried to regain his own composure. 

“Your feelings are justified, Neil. You are allowed to be upset, too. So don’t think that you being scared or upset about her closing herself is selfish or anything, because it’s not.”

Omaha couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle, “Are you sure you’re not a mind reader, Bob?”

“Well, Nick Fury’s not on my doorstep, so I’m gonna stick with no,” Bob laughed.

A beat of silence passed before Neil spoke up.

“Hey, we’re leaving for DC tomorrow morning. Do you think you could go grab my Jeep from the airport and bring it back to the house? Y/N can leave her spare key somewhere for you. And maybe just look after the house since you're only a few houses down?”

“Of course, I can do that for you.”

“Thanks, man.” Neil sighed and looked back toward the bedroom. “I better get going. Calm myself down before she gets out of the shower.”

“Alright, good luck. Call me if you need anything.”

“Will do. Thank you.”

Both hung up, and Neil wiped his face before going back to the bedroom to wait for you to get out of the shower.

You sighed as you tossed and turned in your bed, your body becoming restless the moment you thought you were comfortable. You thought the shower would’ve calmed you down, but the stress was eating at your nerves and making your stomach churn constantly. 

The anxiety was making you feel hot, your already naturally high body temperature rising as your mind ran at a million miles a minute.

Huffing, you threw the cover off of you and got out of bed. 

Your feet drug as you took yourself to the kitchen. 

You got a glass of ice water before going to the living room and sitting in the corner of the couch. 

Sleep wasn’t coming to you anytime soon, not with all the thoughts running through your mind… So you sat on the couch and looked out of your sliding glass doors at the moonlit backyard.

Your eyes felt heavy with tears. They were tears of frustration and anger. Tears of heartbreak. It was all so much, and being left alone with your thoughts was probably the worst situation you could have put yourself in. But you couldn’t go anywhere or talk to anyone about this. They wouldn’t understand anyway. 

Tears weighed down your lash line, blurring your vision as you zoned out completely. They slowly overflowed, breaking the surface tension and tracking down your face.

But you weren’t crying. 

No. Crying involved you actually feeling something, and right now… numbness was overtaking it all. Pushing everything from the last few hours into one blurry mess of static.

You didn’t have time to cry… you had a mission to complete.

The next morning, Neil woke up to see you moving around the room and packing bags for both of you.

He glanced over and checked the time, seeing just how early it was, “What time did you get up?” You didn’t look up from what you were doing as you answered him, “Didn’t sleep.” 

“Star-light…” 

“Oma, I’m fine. If I need to sleep, I’ll sleep,” you said, still shoving things into your bags.

You didn’t need sleep. Sleep was the furthest down on your list of needs. What you really needed was to get on a plane and get to DC so you could confront the hurricane of emotions that were swirling through your being.

You needed to release the fermenting anger and frustration; it was poisoning you, and you knew it. But you were too damn stubborn, wanting to hold it in and take it out on the true cause of it.

Dumping it all on Omaha or your friends wasn’t fair, not in your eyes. It wasn’t justice in them either. John wasn’t going to miss your wrath. He’d been on your radar since he took up the mantle, and now you were trying to get a missile lock.

That was justice.

Neil sighed and got out of bed, ruffling his hair as he walked over to you. “I know you’re a super soldier, but you’re not invincible. Your body can only handle so much. You need to sleep.” He wrapped his arms around you, “I just-”

“Neil, I don’t want to talk about it right now,” you huffed, leaning on the duffels in front of you. 

“I know, and I’m not trying to get you to talk about it. I know you’ll come to me when you’re ready. But I’m not just gonna abandon my duties as your boyfriend. I’m still gonna make sure you take care of yourself because I love you.”

You sighed and dropped your head back onto his shoulder, “I know… I know, I’m sorry.” He kissed your temple, “Don’t apologize. You’re going through a lot. But I’m gonna make sure you’re taken care of.” 

Sniffling a little, you rest your hands on top of his. “Thank you, honey… I just–”

You were cut off by your phone ringing. 

You huffed again and went over to pick it up. “Hello?... No comment.” You hung up and shoved your phone into your sweatpants pocket. 

“That was fast,” Neil pointed out as he started packing whatever was left.

Rubbing your forehead, you sat on the bed as you sighed, “Yeah, that is the… fifth? Maybe the sixth reporter to call me for a statement on all of this. I can’t turn my phone off, so I just answer and say, ‘no comment’. This has been going on since 4 this morning.” You felt your phone go off with a short ring in your pocket. 

Neil opened his mouth to say something but you held a hand up, “Don’t get me started on the emails.”

He just nodded with a playful smile and continued to pack.

You both sat in silence for a little bit, but Omaha broke it when he noticed you were fidgeting.

“Hey, what’s going on? You’re a little more fidgety than you usually are…” 

Last night, as you evaded sleep, it occurred to you that Neil had no idea that John was a super soldier. You hadn’t told him that very important detail last night. It didn’t change your mind, but keeping your boyfriend in the dark about that wasn't fair.

You swallowed, playing with the worn cuffs of your hoodie, “There’s um…” You scratched your brow, “I didn’t tell you everything last night…” 

He stopped packing and came over to stand in front of you, “That’s okay, you don’t have to tell me–” 

“No, this,” you nodded as you kept your head down, looking at your lap. “This I need to tell you…” 

“Doll, you’re worrying me… what’s wrong?” 

You looked up at him, swallowing your nerves before speaking, “John took the serum… he’s a super soldier now.” 

Neil’s eyes widened as he took a few steps back, his lips parting slightly in shock.

“I’m sorry?”

It wasn’t a question. Not really. His brow was furrowed, and his hands were up as he tilted his head, but he wasn’t really asking.

He let out a dry chuckle, “Did you just say that John Walker, the man you’re about to fly to DC to confront, was a um… was a super soldier? Or-or am I hearing things? I really, really hope that’s not what you just said.”

“You heard right… John took the serum,” you played with your fingers, looking down at your lap.

Neil put his hands on his hips and nodded, “Okay…” He wiped his mouth before pressing his lips into a thin line and rolling them between his teeth. 

He took in a deep breath through his nose, attempting to keep his voice steady as emotion began to rise in his throat. He knew his hands would start shaking at any minute, so his voice couldn’t break or waiver and ruin how serious he was.

“You knew… You knew, and you were still gonna confront him? At probably the most emotionally unstable point in his life! Are you insane?!”

You winced a little and rubbed your face as he started to pace back and forth. “Oma-” “Were you even gonna tell me?” Neil cursed himself for the breathy, almost dejected tone that began to work its way into his voice. 

You looked up, desperation for understanding in your eyes. “Yes but-”

“When? Before or after you got yourself killed?”

You stood up, frustrated that he wasn’t letting you explain yourself, “I can handle myself, Neil.” 

“It’s not about that Y/N! It’s about whether or not John is capable of murder! And as we learned last night, he absolutely is!” 

You scoffed and put your hands on your hips, pointing an accusatory finger at your boyfriend, “You just don’t think that I can do it! You don’t think I can handle this, do you?” 

He stayed silent, his brown eyes avoiding you as he tongued his cheek.

Your heart dropped to your feet, and your hands fell limp at your sides. “You actually don’t think I can do this…”

He hung his head, “This is dangerous, Y/N. John isn’t just some dickhead with a shield anymore… He’s angry, and I’m sure whatever the council has to say to him can’t be good.” 

In a flash, your anger resurfaced. “A shield? A shield?! It’s more than just ‘a shield’, Neil! It’s THE shield! The shield my father earned! The shield that was made for him! For HIM! Not John! My dad worked for that shield, he earned it! John was handed the shield! So don’t just call it ‘a shield’ because it is so much more than that! And you know that!”

Neil flinched a little at your volume, not expecting you to react that way, but not shocked by it either. “You’re right, sweetheart, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just…”

Finally, he met your eyes, and you could see the emotion swirling in them. “I’m scared…” 

You swallowed and stayed silent, your anger smothering out as your expression softened.

“An-and I get that confronting him is the best way for you to get your feelings and emotions out… But we know what John is capable of. We know that he can and will kill someone with the slightest bit of provoking. You are going to be his antagonist, and that scares the shit out of me.”

“I can handle John, Neil…” You protested quietly, still hurt by the fact he thought you couldn’t. 

He sighed and rubbed your arms before tilting your head up. “It’s not that I don’t think you can. You’re quite literally the strongest person I know. But I’m scared, Y/N, and I’m not apologizing for being worried for your safety. I just need you to be safe.” 

You sniffled, “I’m not changing my mind… I can’t let him slip by, thinking that I don’t know what he did. He has to know-” You looked away as emotion clogged your throat. “He has to know, Neil. He has to know that I know.”

He gently turned your head back to face him, “I know. And I’m not asking you to change your mind. The bastard deserves to see the pain he caused. All I’m asking is that you’re careful and you really think about your approach. I love you too much to keep in my concerns.” 

You nodded before wrapping your arms around him. “I love you too. I love you so much.” You pulled back and pressed a kiss to his lips, “I’ll try my best to be careful. But I can’t make you a promise…” He nodded, “That’s all I ask.” 

Omaha pecked your lips, “C’mon, we got a flight to catch.”

how do you even describe this...

other than just pain and anger.

star is kicking herself more than she probably should be and omaha is just trying to keep her as safe as he can...

but how will confronting walker turn out?

hi guys! i just want to thank you again for your incredible patience. i can not and will not promise you when the next part will be up and ready to go. but i will be working on it to get it out to you guys 💙

lt rogers tags <33 (i apologize if i missed anyone if i did please remind me in the comments):

@milesdickpic @roosterscockpit @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @twsssmlmaa

@malindacath @startrekfangirl2233 @indigodaydream @that-one-random-writer @hangmansgbaby

@nikkipea @a-court-of-roscoe-and-baby @yourlocalloser-core @mimi-8793 @scalesarenotbalanced

*****************

It’s been about two weeks since Bucky and Sam really talked to you except for when John showed up unannounced at Top Gun.

A lot’s happened with them.

They broke Zemo out of jail, but Bucky will tell you Zemo escaped all on his own. They went to Madipor and almost died. They also saw Sharon Carter. Zemo killed some scientist that had recreated the serum and then they almost died again.

And now they were looking for Karli in Latvia.

****

Zemo just told them that Donya Madani’s funeral would be that afternoon, and it’s highly likely that Karli would be there.

Bucky may have lost his temper a little bit, thrown a teacup maybe. But could you blame him? Not only was he trying to stop a radicalized supremacist Super Soldier and get his best friend's shield back, he was worried about you.

He understood that you had limited contact while on a carrier but he would have liked a text or phone call, something to let him know you were okay.

Sam came back from the call he had to make to Sharon.

“Hey Sam?” Bucky got his attention. “What Bucky?” “Have you heard from Y/N yet? You know anything about the mission she was sent on?” Sam shook his head, “No, I haven’t heard from her. But I know the mission is dangerous and that she said she’d get in touch with us as soon as she was on shore.”

Bucky nodded, “I know it’s just been awhile and she said the mission would only take a day.” “Bucky, she’s on a carrier in the middle of the ocean, it’s gonna take more than a few days,” Sam reasoned.

“She’d want us to focus on our mission, not worry about her. Not that I’m not worrying, but she knows distractions can be fatal.” Bucky just pressed his lips into a thin line and nodded.

*****

When time came to go to the memorial, Bucky, Zemo, and Sam left the safe house.

“Karli Morgenthau is too dangerous for you guys to be pulling this shit.”

Great, John’s here.

Bucky threw his arms to the side as Lemar and John jogged down the steps, “Ah, how’d you find us now?”

“Come on, man. You think two Avengers can walk around Latvia without drawing attention?” Lemar retorted as they went down another flight of stairs.

“No more keeping us in the dark,” John started, as they reached the bottom. “You can start by telling us why you broke him out of prison.” He pointed at Zemo.

Bucky tilted his head a little as they met John and Lemar at the stairs. “He did that himself, technically.”

“What would Lieutenant Rogers think-” Bucky pointed at him, “You leave her out of this. She’s got nothing to do with this. She doesn’t even know we’re here.”

“Well, this,” John gestured to Zemo again, “better have an unbelievable explana-” John got closer and Sam stepped between him and Zemo. “Hey, take it easy before it gets weird.”

Zemo rolled his eyes and stepped through, “I know where Karli is.” Him and Bucky started walking around John.

John’s hand on Zemo’s chest made him stop. “Well, where?” John asked impatiently, looking at Sam. “All we know it, it’s a memorial,” Sam answered. Zemo looked over John’s shoulder and walked around him.

“That means civilians. High risk of casualties,” Lemar said, turning to follow the Baron. “Alright, good, we’ll move in fast. Take her by surprise,” John strategized.

Sam looked at John, “No, I wanna talk to her alone.” John looked over, shaking his head, “I’m not losing her again.”

Sam wasn’t about to let John near Karli, “Look, the person closest to her died, she’s vulnerable. If there’s any time to reason with her it’s now.”

But, John wasn’t having it. He ran up in front of them all, “What? No. Wait, no! No! Stop. Hold on. Stop, okay?” He looks at Sam in the back, “I think we’re way past reasoning with her, unless you forgot that she blew up a building with people still in it.”

Lemar agreed, “Look, Sam, you walk in there cold, she could kill you.”

“If I go in hot and the op goes wrong, more people will die,” Sam argued back.

John looked at Bucky, “You’re gonna let him do this? Are you gonna let your partner walk into a room with a Super Soldier alone?”

“He’s dealt with worse. And he’s not my partner,” Bucky sassed.

Sam tried to reason with John as he walked around Bucky, “I used to counsel soldiers dealing with trauma, okay? This is right in my wheelhouse.” He stood in front of John now.

“Yeah, I know. And I know those soldiers, which is why I know this is a bad idea.” John really just wanted to get this over with and complete his first big mission, and gain your respect.

Lemar shook his head, “Wait… If he can talk her down, it might be worth a try.”

John scoffed, but finally complied. He pointed to Zemo, “We’ll deal with you later.”

“I’m sure it will all come to an agreeable conclusion. My associate is just up ahead.”

They turned and saw a little girl. Zemo led the way.

He spoke to her quietly before she gestured for them to follow her.

“What the hell?” John asked, frustrated that Zemo could gain allies so quickly.

****

The girl led them to a GCR building and pointed in the direction of the memorial.

“Karli’s in there,” Zemo further explained. Sam nodded and walked through, “Alright.”

Zemo goes to follow but John harshly grabs him and shoves him against the wall. Zemo groans a little bit as John speaks to Sam, “Hey. You got 10 minutes.” He cuffs Zemo. “Really?” Zemo rolls his eyes as the cuff locks around his wrist.

“Then we're doing things my way,” John was still talking to Sam as he locked the other around a bar.

“Aggressive,” Zemo mumbles. John looks back at him. “But I get it.”

****

John paced as he waited for Sam.

“You’re gonna pace a hole in the floor, Walker,” Bucky said, arms crossed.

He looked at Bucky, “I’ve been meaning to ask, what would Lieutenant Rogers think about all this? Breaking him out of prison, letting Wilson go in there alone.”

“You seem to care an awful lot about what the pilot thinks,” Zemo observed. John’s jaw clenched. Zemo’s mouth formed an ‘o’, “Oh, you want the lieutenant's approval. That’s what it is.”

Bucky scoffed, “You think bringing Karli in is gonna earn her respect?” John stayed silent. “Well, you better hope Karli’s alive when you do.”

John sat down for a minute or two before beginning to pace again.

“Uh-uh. No, no, no. This is a bad idea,” John said. Whether he genuinely felt uneasy and worried for Sam’s safety, or he just didn’t want Karli to get away and ruin his chance at his first big mission was unclear. However, with his attitude thus far, it was safe to assume the latter.

“It hasn't been 10 minutes,  John. Just sit tight,” Bucky said from his spot in the doorway.

“Don’t do that. Don’t patronize me,” John spat going down to look at the clock.

Bucky shrugged and watched him, “He knows what he’s doing.”

John stares at the clock before Bucky watches his demeanor change and he walks towards him.

When he gets to him, Bucky stops him, giving him a look and a head tilt that said, ‘Don’t even try.’

John stepped back, looking at the ground with a clenched jaw. He looked up at Bucky, attempting to be intimidating and not frustrated. “This is all really easy for you, isn’t it?”

He was talking about the serum in Bucky’s veins, in your veins, but not in his own.

“All that serum runnin’ through your veins. Barnes, your partner needs backup in there…” Bucky just stared as John looked past him. “Do you really want his blood on your hands?”

****

Well…

That went… horrible.

John managed to push past Bucky and into the room, just as Sam was getting somewhere.

His intrusion not only made Karli run, but it also destroyed any rapport Sam had created with her.

But don’t worry, Zemo managed to get free and find her.

He got multiple shots off, hitting her in the abdomen with one of them. But when she knocked the table over, she knocked her vials of serum onto the floor.

Zemo smashed them under his boot, destroying any potential Karli had at expanding her army.

And while he was doing that, Karli managed to escape and John caught up with him, knocking him unconscious with the shield.

****

Back at the safe house, Sam is emailing Sharon while Zemo rested with a cold compact on his face.

“Were you ever offered it?” Zemo asked Sam.

“What?”

“The serum.”

“No.”

“If you had been, hypothetically, that is, would you have taken it?”

That caught Sam’s attention.

“No.”

“No hesitation… that’s impressive.”

Zemo grunted a little as he took the compact off his face. “Sam, you can’t hold out hope for Karli. No matter what you saw in her, she’s gone. And we cannot allow that she and her acolytes become yet another faction of gods amongst real people. Super Soldiers cannot be allowed to exist.”

Sam shook his head and turned toward Zemo, “Isn’t that how gods talk?”

That made Zemo think, leaving him to sit there silently.

“And if that’s how you feel, what about Bucky, or Y/N?”

That didn’t draw a response from Zemo.

“Blood isn’t always the solution.”

The door opened and closed as Bucky walked in, shucking the leather jacket off.

“Somethings off about Walker…”

Sam chuckled, “You don’t say.”

Bucky laid his jacket on the bar and went over to a cabinet. “I know a crazy when I see one.” He pulls out a glass to pour himself a drink, “That’s because I am crazy…”

Sam chuckled, “I believe it.”

Bucky uncorked the bottle and poured his drink, “You and Y/N shouldn’t have given him the shield…”

“We didn’t give him the shield.”

“Well Steve definitely didn’t,” Bucky sassed, bringing the glass to his lips.

Before Sam could retort, the door was kicked open.

“Alright. That’s it. Let’s go. I’m now ordering you to turn him over,” John demanded as he stormed in, Lemar trailing behind him.

Sam stepped up to him, “Hey slow your roll. Now let’s be clear; shield or no shield, the only thing you’re runnin’ in here is your mouth.” John squinted his eyes a little but didn’t say anything. So Sam continued. “Now, I had Karli and you overstepped.”

He pointed with his thumb towards Zemo, “He’s actually proven himself useful today. And we’re gonna need all hands on deck for whatever’s comin’ next.”

“How do you want the rest of the conversation to go, Sam, huh?” Sam just looked at John, making the latter chuckle softly. “Yeah…” John gestured with the shield, “Should I put down the shield? Make it fair?”

Sam scoffed at John’s poor attempt at being intimidating. John put the shield down, preparing himself for a fight.

But before either man could make a move, a vibranium spear was thrown right between them.

Everyone looked in the direction it came from, seeing a Dora Milaje make herself known. Then two more soldiers came through the opened doors.

Ayo spoke in Wakandan to Bucky, “Even if he is a means to your end… Time’s up.” Then she switched to English, “Release him to us, now.”

John turned and held out a hand, “Hi, John Walker, Captain America.” When he got no response he looked around awkwardly. He was losing control of the situation and he didn’t like that.

“Well, uh, let’s put down the pointy sticks and we can talk this through, huh?”

Sam chuckled a little, “Hey, John, take it easy.” John turned to Sam with a look on face, making Sam grin a little bit. “You might want to fight Bucky or Y/N before you tangle with the Dora Milaje.”

John smirked and turned back to Ayo, “The Dora Milaje don’t have jurisdiction here.” She narrowed her eyes and tilted her head, “The Dora Milaje have jurisdiction wherever the Dora Milaje find themselves to be.”

John nodded, “Okay…” He chuckled, “Look, I think we got off on the wrong foot.”

John then proceeded to make the mistake of placing his hand on Ayo’s shoulder…

She used her spear to knock his arm away before hitting him in the knee, then the face. While he was disoriented, she kicked him in the chest and into the spear that was still lodged into the column.

Then just absolute chaos ensued.

The Dora Milaje used their speed and agility to fight both John and Lemar. They’re trained warriors and the way they fight is unique, the two American soldiers were very under prepared.

Sam, Bucky, and Zemo just watched, the latter two finding it pretty amusing.

But Sam walked over to Bucky, “We should do something…” Bucky nodded a little and crossed his arms, “Looking strong John!”

Ayo wasn’t letting up and it made Sam a little antsy. And by the time she got John on the ground, he was sure she would put her spear through his chest.

“Bucky…”

The addressed looked at him and sighed, “Alright, fine.”

Bucky walked over and grabbed the spear, “Ayo…” She pulled the spear back, making Bucky grunt in surprise. “Ayo, let’s talk about this,” he managed to say as he fought her.

In the living room, Sam had to assist Lemar. He took the hits and dodged what he could as the other trapped John to the table by threading her spear through the straps of the shield.

Back with Bucky, Ayo managed to get the upper hand and disarm him… no literally, the Wakandas had embedded a code into the arm in the event the Winter Soldier ever made an appearance again.

While Bucky was stunned Ayo checked the bathroom where she saw Zemo sneak off to, but he had escaped through the grate in the middle of the floor.

John managed to free his arm just before the soldier that threw it took her spear back, letting the shield fall to the floor.

And he didn’t dare move to grab it, so the Dora warrior did.

But Ayo was on a mission.

“He is gone,” she said, referring to the Baron. Then she nodded to the shield. “Leave it,” she ordered.

The warrior nodded and gave the shield back to John, who still sat on the floor trying to catch his breath.

In the kitchen area, Bucky knelt down and picked his arm back up and just looked at it.

“Did you know they could do that?” Sam asked as he got off the floor and walked over to him.

Bucky didn’t answer as he put his arm back on, groaning a little as the plates got back into place. He flexed his fingers, “No.” The mechanisms whirled and clanked a bit before he rotated his arm around and set everything back into place.

Lemar gets up and walks over to John, who is just staring at the floor.

“You alright man?”

“They weren’t even Super Soldiers…” John mumbled out.

His ego was severely damaged. He felt like he was taking a step forward only to get pushed ten steps back. John had lost control and then got his ass handed to him on a vibranium platter.

John was frustrated, he was failing his mission. He’s not ready, and it’s painfully obvious to him now. This role is harder than he thought, Steve’s shoes are too big to fill on his own.

“Come on,” Lemar said as he helped him up.

Sam walked by and only gave John a disgruntled look. A look that clearly told John he fucked up.

*****

John and Lemar stood at a table in the mall, talking about the mission.

“Look man, the serum and its source are gone,” Lemar started. “I know it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to, but it ain’t all bad.” John nodded and gave him a small, tight lipped smile.

Before John could respond, a girl came up to him and asked for an autograph, which he gave her.

He thanked them and wished them a good day before turning back to his friend, rubbing his face in exhaustion.

“How long until that gets annoying?” Lemar teased. John chuckled, “You’re just mad she didn’t ask for yours…” “Oh, it’s her loss,” Lemar threw back. “Even got a little Battlestar logo to go with it.”

John exhales amusedly through his nose.

He tapped the table, “If you had the chance to take the serum, would you do it?” Lemar nodded, “Hells, yeah.”

“You wouldn’t be worried about how it might… how it might change you?”

Lemar thought about it before sighing, “I mean… Power just makes a person more of themselves, right?” He shrugged, “Karli Morgenthau. Steve and Y/N Rogers.”

John nodded a little before looking at him, “And me?”

Lemar faced his friend completely, “You already have three Medals of Honor. You consistently make the right decisions in the heat of battle.”

John rubbed his brow, “Yep…” He kept his eyes on the table, “Three badges of excellence to make sure I never forget the worst day of my life…”

He looked up at Lemar, “We both know that the things we had to do in Afghanistan to be awarded those medals felt a long way from being right… Being Cap is the first time I’ve had the chance to do something that actually feels right.”

“But God! Imagine how many lives we could have saved that day if we had that serum,” Lemar said. John nodded, “I know… I know.”

*******

You laid on the couch, your fingers gently running through Omaha’s dark hair as he rested his head on your stomach.

The setting sun casted a beautiful orange glow over the room as the movie played on TV. You could feel the vibration of Neil’s chest against your thighs as he snored.

The squad had just gotten back to North Island earlier that afternoon and after the debriefing all you and Omaha wanted to do was cuddle and be with each other. So that’s what you did.

You knew you should probably call Sam and Bucky, but you had been on a cramped carrier all week and you just wanted to spend some time with your boyfriend. You also weren’t sure where they were or if they were busy, so you’d just let them call your first or check in with them after you’ve had time to decompress.

Which is why you were finally letting your eyes slip closed as you relaxed.

And then your phone rang.

Groaning, you reached for your phone. You picked it up and answered it, not bothering to check the caller ID.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is this Y/N?”

The voice on the other end was unfamiliar, and it put you on alert. It was foreign, sounded European but pinpointing exactly where wasn’t really your concern.

You carefully sat up, hoping you wouldn’t wake Omaha, “It is. Who are you?”

“My name is Karli Morgenthau.”

You froze for a second. You recognized that name.

Sam and Bucky tried to keep you in the dark, but you had connections. Someone on the very inside that was keeping you updated as best he could. And the name ‘Karli Morgenthau’ came up a lot recently.

You gently get up as you speak, “I know the name… You’re the leader of the Flag Smashers, right? The group against the GRC?”

Making sure Neil is still asleep, you step out onto the back porch.

“I am, and you’re Steve Rogers daughter…”

“I am… Why are you calling me Karli?”

She sighs, “I need you to stay out of my way. I know how close you are with Sam and Bucky…”

“Are you threatening me, Karli?”

“All I’m asking is that you make sure Bucky stays out of my way. I want to speak with Sam, alone. If Bucky comes with him, I can’t promise he’ll make it out alive…”

You cross your arms and lean against the railing, “Bucky can hold his own, he is a trained assassin after all.”

Karli’s quiet for a moment before speaking again. “You know that we’ve reached people all across the world right? Have pulled hundreds of people to the cause, some in San Diego?”

You knew what she was doing but you weren’t going to take any chances.

“What do you want me to do?”

“Just stay out of it. Don’t try and warn them, I’ll know. I can track your calls and text,” she says with authority.

You can see why she has a following, and you understand her cause… but her methods don’t sit right with you.

“And if I don’t?”

“If you want your friends, your boyfriend, to stay safe… you’ll do as I ask…”

You can hear the smirk in her voice, the baseless arrogance thinking that she had intimidated you. You knew there was a big chance that she was lying, that she was just using the people you held close and loved as leverage. She was a bully, and the Rogers don’t like bullies.

But were you really going to risk the safety of your family? No, you weren’t.

“Okay, I won’t intervene…”

“Good.”

She hung up and you let out a breath.

“Everything okay?”

You looked up and saw Neil in the doorway. You smiled at him, “Yeah, yeah, everything’s fine. I just needed to take a phone call… I didn’t want to wake you.” He nodded and came over to you. 

“Was it Sam or Bucky?” You shook your head, “No, it was my contact. He was updating me, said they were doing just fine and were getting close to stopping this group.”

He smiled, “Okay that’s good.” He wrapped his arms around you, “Do you want to go out for dinner or just eat here?” You put your arms around his neck and tilt your head, “I’d rather eat here, if that’s okay?” 

Omaha nods, “Of course that’s okay. I do need to go get some stuff-” “I can go get it. I don’t mind.” 

He squeezed your hips, “Are you sure?” You nodded and pressed your lips to his.

He hummed against your lips and pulled you close. You arched into him and got on your toes. Neil gripped your hips and picked you up to sit you on the railing.

You giggled and sat your phone down as he began to kiss your neck.

A moan fell from your lips and your hand slipped under his shirt. His hands moved up your sides; one in the middle of your back to keep you firmly against him and the other buried itself under your messy bun to pull your lips to his in a deep kiss.

Your free hand pulled him closer by his waistband as he licked your bottom lip. 

He slipped his tongue into your mouth, battling for dominance with yours.

You’re moaning and whimpering against each other’s mouths before he has to pull away for air.

“Fuck, Star-light…” You chuckled at the breathlessness in his voice as you took a few deep breaths. “After dinner Oma, I promise.” 

Neil nodded as he swallowed, “I’ll hold you to that.” You laughed again as you both sat there in each other’s arms. 

Your phone going off vibrated the railing you were perched on and shattered the moment.

You checked it, just to see that it was a text from Fanboy about a new show you had talked about watching together. 

You looked back up at your boyfriend, “I should probably head to the store.” He nods, “Let me make a list. What sounds good?” You think about it for a minute, trying to find out what’s making your mouth water. “Ooooh, chicken and steak quesadillas? With homemade tortilla chips?” 

“Do we have tortillas?” You nod, a grin spreading across your face. He mirrors it, “Then that’s perfect. I’ll make the chips while you go to the store.” 

Giddy, you peck his lips, “Okay, make a list while I fix my hair and make myself look presentable.” He grinned and kissed you back, “Yes, ma’am.” 

You shove him away with a giggle and you both go inside.

You go into your room and fix your hair before throwing on one of Neil’s hoodies. As you do that, your phone dings with another text, this time it’s from Sarah Wilson. 

“I need you to call me. Karli just made contact with me…”

You huffed and dug through one of the drawers in your closet.

“C’mon…” You sighed once you found it. “There you are.” You pulled out the old burner phone Nick had given you and slid it into your pocket.

After that you slipped on your shoes, got the list and another kiss from Neil and you’re out the door.

******

Sam and Bucky were walking around Latvia looking for Zemo when Sam’s phone rang.

“Who is it?” Bucky asked, not looking at the caller ID. “It’s my sister,” Sam mumbled, concern in his tone as he answered. “Hey, what’s up?”

Bucky couldn’t hear what Sarah was saying but by the way Sam responded, he could tell it wasn’t good.

“Listen, pack an overnight bag and take the boys.”

Bucky turns his head, “What happened?”

Sam pulled his phone away from his ear, “Karli called Sarah. She threatened my nephews.” He brought his phone back to his ear.

“Okay. Go somewhere safe. Only pay cash. Alright? Let me know when you get there.”

Bucky’s phone vibrates in his pocket.

“I know. Look, I love you. I’ll never let anything happen to you and the boys.” Bucky pulls his phone out to check the notification.

“Okay, bye.”

Sam hangs up as Bucky slows to stop to read the text from an unknown number. Bucky’s brow furrowed and he frowned at his phone.

Sam arched an eyebrow, “Everything okay?” Bucky shook his head, “I’m not sure.” Sam peaked over at Bucky’s phone screen, reading the text on the screen.

“Karli wants to meet Sam somewhere alone. Don’t let him go alone, but don’t get caught either. Watch your 6, Buck - ⭐”

“That has to be Y/N…” Bucky said, a sense of dread filling his chest that Karli knew your number. “It’s signed with a star… thingy.”

“An emoji?”

“Whatever it is, that can’t be a coincidence.”

Sam nodded as he sighed, “She used an Avengers burner phone… we can’t track it because she most likely took the battery out. But that means no one else can track that text back to her either.”

Bucky nods and deletes the text and the number from his phone, just as a secondary precaution.

“But she’s right… Karli wants to meet me somewhere. She left a contact number with Sarah,” Sam confirmed just before his phone sounded with a text notification.

He looked at it and it was a location and time. The rooftop about North Plaza, and now. She wasn’t going to let him sit and develop a plan.

“She said to come alone… Like Y/N said…” Sam told Bucky, nerves and fear filling him as he looked at the sniper.

Even had you not warned Bucky, he wasn’t about to let Sam face Karli alone.

“I’m coming with you.”

****

After changing into their gear, they went to the plaza.

“Karli!” Sam shouted as soon as he entered the room.

The Super Soldier leaned over the railing to make herself known and the two men made their way up the stairs.

“You called my sister? That’s how we’re gonna play this?” Sam questioned the moment he topped the steps.

“Sam, I would never hurt her,” Karli said gently as she leaned on the banister. “I just wanted to understand you better.”

She pushed off the half wall, “I see you, uh–” She pointed to Bucky, “–didn’t come alone.”

“You have to end this, now,” Sam said, natural, but gentle, authority in his voice.

Karli shook her head, “I don’t wanna hurt you. You’re just a tool in the regimes I’m looking to destroy.” She glances at Bucky who walks a little closer to cover Sam’s back, “You’re not hiding behind a shield.”

“If I were to kill you, it would be meaningless,” she said bluntly.

In all fairness, Sam and Bucky weren’t representing symbols like John was. They weren’t members of the government or the GRC. Their deaths would do nothing for Karli’s cause.

Sam glanced over his shoulder to Bucky, assessing his body language and overall demeanor before turning back to Karli.

“I was gonna ask you to join me… or do the world a favor and let me go.”

Before Sam could say or do anything, Sharon spoke into his comms.

“Hey, Sam, new Cap is moving, looks like he’s found them, or maybe they found him.”

Sam’s eyes widened and he looked at Bucky, “It’s Walker.”

Bucky quickly made the move to jump down, but Karli had other plans. She jumped and slammed into Bucky, causing him to slam into the column.

While Bucky pushed off the ground with a groan, Sam fought Karli. He placed a kick to her chest, throwing her off balance.

He looked at Bucky, “I’ll send you the location, go.” Buck nodded and ran through the door while Sam deployed his wings and took off before Karli could get up.

****

When Sam landed at the location, having cannonballed through the skylight onto the stairs, a Flag Smasher was kicked through the door about two flights above him and straight into the wall.

Sam looked up the flight of stairs and saw John walking down them with a look of determination on his face, sheathing the shield on his back as he got closer.

Sam could only watch as the Flag Smasher tried to hit John with a pipe, only for John to catch it and wrestle with him for a moment… before he easily bent the pipe. The steel pipe.

“Oh shit…”

John threw the soldier into a pillar, who hit it harshly but managed to get up and run.

Sam watched John descend the steps and walk past him, “What did you do?” John bypassed the question, “They’ve got Lemar.”

****

Bucky entered the building from the bottom floor, skipping steps as he ran up the stairs.

As he ran up a flight, he’s ambushed on his left side and slammed into the wall.

The soldier grabbed him from behind and tried to put him in a chokehold. But Bucky leveraged himself against the wall and launched them into a pillar.

He managed to free himself from the guy's hold. Bucky parried one of the punches thrown at him before kicking him down the stairs.

Bucky hurdled the railing and stalked toward the Flag Smasher as he tried to get up.

Before he could stand up, Bucky planted his boot into the guy’s chest and sent him through the brick wall.

Bucky checked to make sure the soldier was unconscious before leaving.

“Stay there.”

****

Sam and John made it to a big open, seemingly empty, room.

Then two soldiers jumped down behind them from the landing.

John reflexively threw the shield, hitting them both. Sam closed-lined one with his wing, while the other pulled a knife on John.

“What’s with all the knives?”

Within a few minutes of them fighting, Bucky made his appearance as well as two more Flag Smashers.

The one with the knife tried to stab John, but he countered it with the shield and sent the blade flying towards Bucky. Luckily he caught it.

But a soldier approached him from behind with a knife of their own.

Bucky readied himself and the soldier charged, kick flipping before attempting to attack. But the attempted slashes were parried and countered with a few punches and a knee to the ribs. Then Bucky gets leverage and is able to flip them onto their back.

He flips the knife in his hand and throws it into the floor next to the soldier’s head.

Another soldier grabbed Sam from behind. He quickly elbowed them and turned on his thrusters, using the heat to disorient them before kicking them over the table.

John hit one in the face with the shield before throwing another on the ground.

The one thrown charged at a preoccupied Sam, but Bucky intercepted them and punched them out.

“You’re welcome.”

As John fought, he was grabbed from behind by a maskless Flag Smasher.

John struggled to get free and the soldier locked his arms, exposing his chest.

Karli charged in, hurdling a table and running to John, knife at the ready.

But Lemar came in just in time and tackled Karli.

They both got up off the ground, ready to fight. But Karli was faster.

One well placed, powerful punch to Lemar’s chest sent him into a concrete column. Killing him instantly.

****

It was like the world was put into slow motion.

The fighting stopped as Lemar slumped on the floor.

John broke free of the hold on him and went straight to Lemar.

He knelt next to him, “Hey. Hey. Hey.” John patted his chest and shook his shoulder. He held Lemar’s face, “Lemar. Lemar.”

John kept repeating Lemar’s name, but it was no use. Lemar was dead.

The rage that filled John was visible. Everyone in the room felt it.

Bucky and Sam were stunned, catching their breath as they watched John.

But the Flag Smashers took their chance and ran.

Karli took a different exit than the others, and Bucky and Sam followed her.

John took the quickest exit, jumping out the window. He immediately clocked the soldier that held him back.

He chased him into the town square. Using the shield to block what concrete object was thrown at him.

“Where is she?!”

John ran, throwing the shield at the soldier’s back before running up to him and hitting him in the chest, knocking him back into the memorial.

He tried to get up but John knocked him down with the shield. He tried again but John pinned him under his boot.

“It wasn’t me!” He shouted, begging for his life.

John said nothing as he raised the shield.

“It wasn’t me!”

The soldier’s final plea fell on deaf ears as the edge of the shield was brought down on his chest.

****

The crowd that had gathered gasped as John brought the shield down three more times, shouting in rage.

Once the man fell limp under John, he stood and took deep breaths.

Bucky and Sam ran through the crowd, but they were too late. Far too late.

John strapped the bloodied shield to his arm. Brandishing the tainted symbol to the recording phones.

Blood was rushing in John’s ears, dampening the sounds of the world around him. But his eyes worked just fine.

The sight of a crowd, multiple cameras, Sam and Bucky, and a dead body greeted John as he looked around.

Then the sprinkling rain hit his skin and the weight of his actions barreled into him… and he ran.

******

Bucky and Sam chased after John, finding him in an abandoned train station.

They find him kneeling, grieving the loss of his best friend. They don’t intervene, they know he needs it.

It’s not until John stands and walks in their direction that they make their move.

“Walker…” Sam said cautiously.

John looked at them, but didn't stop walking, “You guys should see a medic, you don't look so good.”

“Stop, Walker.”

John turns around, “What?” He started gesturing with his hands, “You saw what happened. You know what I had to do. I killed him because I had to! He killed Lemar!”

Bucky shook his head, “He didn’t kill Lemar, John.”

Walker just rolled his eyes and sighed.

“Don’t go down that road,” Bucky advised. “Believe me, it doesn’t end well.”

“I’m not like you.”

Sam stepped up, trying to reason with John and calm him down.

“Listen, it was the heat of the battle. Okay? If you explain what happened, they may consider your record. We don’t want anyone else to get hurt.”

Bucky couldn’t stop looking at the blood on the shield as Sam stayed calm.

“John… You gotta give me the shield, man.”

Walker looked up at the two, “Oh…” He smirked a little, appearing as if he just figured a riddle. “So that’s what this is…” He looked at Sam, “You almost got me.”

Sam shook his head and shrugged, “You made a mistake.”

John looked between them, “You don’t wanna do this.”

Bucky clenched his jaw and looked up at Walker, tearing his eyes away from the now tainted memory of his best friend.

“Yeah we do.”

****

The fight that ensued was quick, but it was ugly.

John wasn’t giving up that shield easily, but Sam and Bucky weren’t letting him leave with it.

Faces were bloodied, rib cages were bruised and broken.

Sam and Bucky’s intentions were just to incapacitate John and take the shield.

Walker was trying to kill them.

He was aiming for the chest, the throat, the face, the head. Anywhere that could be lethal, that’s where John was aiming.

John thought he deserved that shield. After everything he went through to be chosen. After what he endured that got him a spot on the list.

He wasn’t going to let them simply take it. They would have to kill him.

But they didn’t.

Sam and Bucky had every opportunity to kill John. Just like that, John is dead and the shield is theirs.

Except, it wasn’t that simple to them… Well maybe to Bucky it was but he had to think about more than just what he wants.

They fought and fought. Their backs met the concrete more than they would care to admit.

John ripped Sam’s wings from his pack, nearly decapitated him with the shield before Bucky intervened.

After Bucky took hits to the ribs and face, Sam managed to get ahold of the shield. Both of them work together to take the shield from where it was strapped to John’s arm.

Bucky had John pinned to a broken down forklift and Sam had to use his thrusters to get the shield to finally come off… snapping John’s arm in the process.

But Walker wasn’t letting them just walk away.

He stood from the ground, chest heaving as he walked towards them. “It’s mine.”

Sam stared him down. “It’s over, John.”

“It’s mine!”

He throws a punch at Bucky, only for it to be countered. While disoriented from the punch, John tries to run at Bucky, only for the assassin to lower his shoulder and pick him up by the legs.

Sam took the shield and ran, the shield meeting John’s back as Bucky slung the man and knocking them all to the ground.

Bucky is the first to stand, picking up the shield and dropping it by Sam’s head before walking out.

*****

The next day, Sam and Bucky met with Torres at the same building Mama Donya’s memorial was in.

Bucky left shortly after Joaquin arrived, leaving Sam alone with him.

“What’s our next steps, Torres?” Sam asks, propping himself on the table.

“Captain America killing a foreign national in public, it’s kinda like a big deal… Like-like international incident big. Folks, uh, higher up on the payroll are all over it now. So, unfortunately…”

“They’re taking jurisdiction,” Sam finished.

Torres nodded, “Yeah.”

He looked down and noticed Sam’s equipment bag on the ground, broken wings inside.

“What happened to these?” He walked over and picked the bag up with a grunt, sitting it on the table.

“So, is there anything we can do?” Sam asked Torres as he looked through the bag.

Joaquin shook his head a little, “Not really.” He continued to look at the damaged wings, “As you can see, they’ve cordoned off the whole camp, and Karli’s a ghost. After what went down, she’s laying extra low. Like under-underground.”

“And that’s why it makes sense for us to get involved. The longer we let her regroup, the harder it’s going to be to find her,” Sam told him.

“She’s got people helping her from all over the world, on all platforms. She’s… really good at this thing.”

Sam nodded his agreement, “Yeah.”

Torres ran his hand over the wings, “How’d these break?” But his question is only answered with a sigh.

So he moved on.

“Anyway, all we can do now is sit tight and just chill. Sometimes, there’s nothing to do until there’s something to do.”

Sam stood and smirked a little, “That’s bizarrely wise.”

Torres chuckled, “Well, I’m a bizarrely wise man, Sam.” “Yeah, alright.”

Sam’s phone rang in his pocket and he sighed. He picked up the shield and turned to leave.

“That Star?” Joaquin asked, standing straighter. Sam reached for his phone, “I hope so… Thanks Torres.” He nodded, “For sure.”  

Sam pulled his phone out and walked toward the exit.

“Wait, yo, you forgot the wings,” Torres called out. Sam looked over his shoulder, “Keep ‘em.”

****

Sam answered your call once he got outside.

“I know-”

“What. The. Fuck did he do?”

Sam sucked in a breath.

This was bad.

********************

well....

that was... something

john walker has defiled and tainted the shield’s legacy... everything steve rogers stood for covered in the blood of someone. sam and bucky had their go, now it’s star’s turn

i’m sorry it took so long to get this part up, but it’s here know! and we’re getting more into the events of TFATWS. the next few parts will follow the events of the last two episodes. but it won’t stop there.

let me know if you want to be added to my top gun taglist or the lieutentant rogers taglist by rebloging the masterlist linked at the top, commenting, or sending me an ask!

lt. rogers tags <33: @milesdickpic @roosterscockpit @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @malindacath @twsssmlmaa @cassiemitchell @startrekfangirl2233 @mayhemmanaged @nikkipea​  @that-one-random-writer​ 

***************

All the aviators stood on the carrier, stock still at attention. You were in the front by Hangman.

Maverick stood at the front, “It has been an honor flying with you. Each one of you represents the best of the best. This is a very specific mission. My choice is a reflection of that and nothing more.”

You kept your head down, clenching your jaw.

“Choose your two Foxtrot teams.” You sucked in a breath. “Payback and Fanboy. Phoenix and Bob.”

The fact it wasn’t Omaha and Halo loosened the coil in your chest, but it tightened ever so slightly now that it was Bob.

“And your wingman.” Next to you, Hangman straightened and tried not to smirk. Somewhere in the back Omaha held his breath just like you did.

Maverick hesitated for a second before looking up and past you, “Rooster.”

You glanced back at him to see that he was just as surprised. You smiled a little bit, proud of him. Hangman obviously wasn’t happy, but Omaha relaxed and huffed out the breath he was holding.

“The rest of you will stand by on the carrier for any reserve role that’s required. Dismissed.”

****

“Your target is a clear and present threat,” Warlock started. “A secret uranium enrichment site under rogue state control. It’s an underground bunker, tucked between these two mountains. Your route of ingress is heavily defended by surface-to-air missiles backed up by fifth-generation fighters.” 

“Once your F-18 strike team crosses the border, Tomahawk missiles from the USS Leyte Gulf will launch a synchronized strike on the enemy’s airfield here. This will knock out their runway. But you’ll have to contend with any planes already in the air. The moment those Tomahawks hit, the enemy will know we’re coming. Your time to target will be two minutes and 30 seconds. Any longer than that and you will be exposed to any aircraft the Tomahawks may have missed.”

You took in a deep breath, really hating the way sweat dripped down your back.

“This is what you’ve all been training for. Come home safely,” Cyclone said, glancing at the squadron. “Get to your planes.”

Everyone went to the deck and to their planes.

“Star!” You turned and saw Bob jogging towards you. “Bob,” You smiled at him as he hugged you. “Don’t do anything stupid ‘til I get back,” he said, a teasing smirk on his face. You laughed, “How can I? You’re takin’ all the stupid with you.” He shoved your shoulder before going over to Phoenix.

As you stepped on the ladder to your plane, Omaha jogged over.

“Y/N,” you smiled and took your foot off the ladder. “Neil-” You hugged him tightly, even though neither of you were going in the air, you had been chosen for Dagger Spare. 

“Once we get back on land, we’re going to dinner, we're going dancing. All of it.” You laughed and smiled, “You got it.” He pecked your lips and went to his own plane.

As you stepped back up, someone stopped you. 

“Star! Hold on,” he came over as you put your foot back down. “What’s up?” “I told Cyclone and Warlock, I guess they didn’t tell you…” “Tell me what?” He sighed, “Something’s wrong with your plane, we can’t clear her for flight.”

Your heart dropped, “So, even if I was chosen I couldn’t have gone up?” “Yeah… I’m sorry, Lieutenant.” You swallowed and nodded, “I understand, thank you.” When he walked away, you ripped your helmet off.

You were upset that you didn’t get picked, but you were heartbroken at the fact that it wouldn’t have mattered. You huffed as you stowed your ladder and started to walk back into the carrier and try to talk to Cyclone or Warlock.

****

Hangman had watched the entire interaction, but he couldn’t hear it. However when you yanked your helmet off, he had a pretty good idea of what happened.

Jake watched you stow your ladder before walking away with your head down. He understood how you felt, he wasn’t picked either. But now, it looks like you didn’t have a chance to be a part of this mission at all.

He jogged up to you, “Star!” You kept going, but he knew you heard him.

“Star!” He picked up his pace, “Hey-” “What Hangman?” Your tone didn’t have the edge to it he thought it would, it was annoyed, sure, but it was more disappointed than anything. “What’s going on? Why aren’t you getting ready?”

You sighed and glanced back toward your plane, “Something’s wrong with her. She can’t go in the air.” You looked back at Jake, “Wouldn’t have mattered if I was picked, I would’ve been grounded.”

Hangman frowned but didn’t really know what to say.

You had been selected as the first spare to be deployed if needed. But with you grounded, that was now Jake’s spot.

Except, he wasn’t as happy about it as he’d thought he’d be.

“Be safe, Jake. I’ll see you when this is over,” you gave him a small smile and patted his arm before turning and going back towards the carrier entrance.

Just before you got too far, he called out to you.

“What if we went together?”

The words had left his mouth before he realized what he was saying.

You arched a brow, going back over to him. “Are you serious?”

He nodded, “Yeah, I know you can backseat. And I know how much this mission means to you. Probably more than it means to me.” He stuck his hand out, “What do you say Rogers?” 

You fought the smile threatening your lips, but nodded and shook his hand, “Let’s do this Seresin.”

****

Jake turned over his shoulder to look at you, “We ready back there, Rogers?” “We are good to go, Seresin,” you smiled at him.

Maverick’s voice came through the comms, “Dagger One, up and ready on Catapult One.”

Jake grabbed his mask, “Dagger Spare standing by.”

Everyone else confirmed their status.

“Dagger Four, up and ready.”

“Dagger Three, up and ready.”

“Dagger Two, up and ready.”

And just minutes later, they were all leaving the carrier.

You and Hangman listened to comms as you sat on the carrier.

“Hey, thank you for doing this, Hangman. You didn’t have too,” you said, trying to come off nonchalant but he knew it meant a lot to you. “Yeah, I know, Star. But, like I said, this mission means more to you than it does to me. And I wasn’t just gonna let you mope. You’re annoying when you mope.”

You laughed as he attempted to brush it off as something beneficial for him, “Whatever you say Seresin.”

“Comanche, Dagger One. Standby check in.” “Comanche 1-1 set. Picture clean. Recommend Dagger continue.” “Copy. Daggers descending below radar.”

“Daggers now below radar. Switching to E-2 picture.”

“Here we go, enemy territory up ahead. Feet dry in 60 seconds. Comanche, Dagger One. Picture.” “Comanche, picture clean. Decision is yours.” “Copy.”

You looked out towards the water, adrenaline kicking in as you listened to Maverick.

“Dagger attack.” “Tomahawks airborne.”

When the missiles passed over the team, Maverick spoke, “Daggers, assume attack formation.”

“Daggers set, proceeding to target. Two minutes and 30 seconds in three, two, one, mark.”

“Two mark.”

“Three mark.”

“Four mark.”

You checked your own watch, mentally noting the time. “Did you just check your watch too?” Jake asked from the front. “Yeah. Gives me a little control. Knowing how long it’s been and how much time they have left helps me determine my own course of action.” “That the Rogers in you?” “No, it’s the Avenger in me.”

Hangman nodded and focused back in on the comms where they were noting SAM locations.

Bob came over, “We got two minutes to target.” Payback responded, “Copy. We’re a few seconds behind, Rooster. We got to move.”

You inhaled, habitually checking your watch.

Jake mumbled from his seat, “Come on Bradshaw. Don’t get on your perch now.”

“Thirty seconds to Tomahawk impact on enemy airstrip.”

You glanced back out toward the water, “Tell him how you feel, Jake.” “I don't know what you’re talking about, Star.” You scoff-laughed, “Sure you don’t.” You shook your head and bit your lip to keep yourself from saying anything else.

“Dagger, Comanche. We’re picking up two bandits. Single group, two contacts.”

Your breath hitched, “Shit…”

Phoenix came over, “Comanche, what’s their heading?” “Bull's-eye 090, 50, tacked southwest.” Rooster chimed in, “They’re headed away from us. They don’t know we’re here.”

“The second those Tomahawks hit the air base, those bandits are gonna move to defend the target,” Maverick said. “We have to get there before they do. Increase speed.”

“We got you, Mav. Don’t wait for me.”

The only thing heard for a few seconds was heavy breathing.

“Sir, Daggers Two and Four are behind schedule.”

You checked your watch, “They’ve only got a minute 20. C’mon Rooster.” Hangman tensed and shifted in his seat.

“Tomahawk impact in three, two…  Impact. Enemy runway is destroyed.”

“Bandits are switching course to defend the target.”

“Rooster, where are you?” Mav asked, making both you and Jake hold your breath.

“Come on, Rooster. Bandits inbound. We gotta make up time now. Let’s turn and burn,” Payback encouraged from behind.

“Heads up, Phoenix.”

“Sir, bandits are two minutes from target. Daggers are one minute from target.”

“Guys! We’re fallin’ behind we really gotta move,” Fanboy announced. “If we don’t increase our speed right now, those bandits are gonna be waiting for us when we reach the target,” Payback added.

You ran a hand down your face, “Rooster…”

“Talk to me Dad,” Rooster mumbled over the comms, mostly to himself. You weren’t sure if he knew people could hear him and you weren’t sure who had heard him.

But Maverick did, “Come on, kid, you can do it. Don’t think, just do.”

All you heard from Rooster was a deep exhale and then a grunt.

“Jesus, Rooster, not that fast!” Payback exclaimed and you almost laughed.

“That’s it, kid. That’s it.” “Let’s go.”

“Damn Rooster take it easy!” Fanboy shouted, surprised by the pilot's sudden demeanor change.

“Sir, Dagger Two is reengaging.”

You smiled and looked towards Jake, seeing a small, proud smile on his face.

“Thirty seconds to target. Bob, check your laser.” “Air-to ground check complete. Laser code verified, 1-6-8-8. Laser is a go!”

“Watch your heads!” “Holy shit! Shit!” “Payback, you with me?” “Right behind you.”

“Phoenix, stand by for pop up strike.” “Dagger Three in position.” “Popping in three, two, one.”

You held your breath as Maverick and Phoenix popped and dove into the target, the only thing being picked up by the comms was their heavy breathing.

“Get me eyes on that target, Bob.” “Dagger Three. Stand by, Mav.” “Come on, Bob, come on.” “Stand by.” A long beep of a target lock rang out. “I’ve got it. Captured!” “Target acquired. Bombs away.”

Everyone waited with baited breath as you listened for confirmation.

“We’ve got impact! Check, direct hit! Direct hit!”

You clapped your hands and pumped your fist, “Let’s go! One miracle down.”

“Dagger Two, status!” “Almost there, Mav. Almost there.”

Jake’s shoulders rose with the deep breath he took as Rooster and Payback dove into the target.

“Fanboy, where’s my laser?” “Rooster, there’s something wrong with this laser! Shit! Deadeye, deadeye, deadeye!”

You sucked in a breath, “Oh fuck.”

“Come on, guys, we’re running out of time.” “Get it online!” “I’m trying! I’m trying!”

Your heart rate increased and Jake looked over his shoulder at you with wide eyes.

“Come on, Fanboy!” “Nearly there! Nearly there!”

Maverick, Phoenix, and Bob’s heavy breathing broke up the small moment of silence.

“Come on, Fanboy, get it online,” Payback threw over his shoulder.

Rooster had to make a decision. “There’s no time. I’m dropping blind.”

Your stomach dropped and Jake’s eyes got wider before he turned back around.

“Rooster, I got this!” “No time. Pull up.” “Rooster, wait!” “Bombs away! Bombs away!”

“Oh my gosh,” Jake mumbled as he focused in on the radio. You mumbled to yourself too, “Hit the target. Hit the target.”

Once again, everyone waited with baited breath.

“Bull’s-eye, bull’s-eye, bull’s eye!”

Everyone cheered.

You leaned forward and caught Hangman, mid-celebratory dance. “He did it, he fucking did it!” He looked over his shoulder at you, “Holy shit!” You both laughed in relief and high-fived. “Now they just need to make it home.”

****

Coffin corner was chaos over the comms.

Directions and warnings spoken so rapidly you could barely keep up. Missile locks were ringing out through the comms and it increased your heart rate. Calls of ‘smoke in the air’ and defensive maneuvers muddling with everything else; all of it becoming one sound.

Until now.

“Dagger Two defending!” Nothing. “Shit! I’m out of flares!”

Your head whipped up to look at Jake whose eyes nearly glossed over with tears. A brick settled itself in your stomach and your hands felt numb.

“Rooster, evade, evade!” “I can’t shake them! They’re on me! They’re on me!”

Then all you heard was:

“Mav! Mav! No!”

Tears hit the backs of your eyes. Not Mav. God, please, not Maverick.

“Dagger One is hit! I repeat, Dagger One is hit! Maverick is down!” Phoenix confirmed over comms.

You hit your dash, “Shit!” You looked up and took deep breaths, closing your eyes to come up with a plan.

“Dagger One, status. Status!” Rooster tried. “Anyone see him? Does anyone see him? Dagger one, come in!” “I didn’t see a parachute,” Payback finally said. “We have to circle back!”

“Comanche. Bandits inbound. Single group, hot. Recommend Dagger flow south. One minute to intercept.”

“All Daggers flow to ECP. You have bandits headed for you.” “What about Maverick?”

Your eyes shot open, “They aren’t going back for Mav. Hangman we’ve gotta do something.” Jake lifted his mask as you both started prepping, “Dagger Spare request permission to launch and fly air cover.”

“Negative, Spare.”

You stopped your movements and Jake threw his mask down. “What the hell!? We can’t just leave him out there! He could still be alive!” Jake sighed, “I don’t like it either, but, orders are orders, Star.”

“Dagger, you are not to engage.” This command was directed at Rooster, but you still felt that it was directed at you too. “Repeat, do not engage.”

Rooster didn’t respond.

“Dagger Two, return to carrier. Acknowledge.” Nothing. “Acknowledge.”

Phoenix tried to reason, “Rooster, those bandits are closing. We can’t go back.” It was clear she want to say it, but it had to be said. “Rooster, he’s gone. Maverick’s gone.”

All that was heard was Rooster’s heavy breathing before he turned his comms off.

“What the hell is he doing?!” Jake asked, panicked. You huffed out a breath, “Saving his family.”

It was silent for a few minutes as Rooster turned his plane around to search for Maverick.

The hairs on the back of your neck and your arms stood up and you got a gut feeling something wasn’t right.

“Dagger Two is hit. Dagger Two is hit.”

“Dagger Two, come in.” Silence. “Dagger Two, do you copy?” Nothing. “Dagger Two, come in.” Still, nothing.

Your heart dropped. No, you couldn’t do this again. You couldn’t. Your hand was shaking as it covered your mouth. But you had to stay composed.

In front of you, Jake was shocked into motionlessness; the only movement being the rise and fall of his shoulders.

Finally, after a few moments Jake looked toward the sky, “I never told him. I never fucking told him.” “We’ll get him back, Jake. We have to.”

****

It had been silent for too long.

The other two groups had landed a long time ago and were getting examined.

You shook your head, “I don’t like this, Hangman. Why isn’t Cyclone sending search and rescue?” He shook his head, “I don’t know, but I’m getting tired of waiting.” You arched your brow, “What are you saying?”

Jake turned to you over his shoulder, “I’m saying, we go anyway.” “But I thought you said-” “Yeah, well, I changed my mind.” You smiled, “Alright.” “Now if you don’t want to do this-” “Jake, I’m with you. Whatever you want to do, I’m with you.”

You both clipped on your masks and began to taxi.

“Dagger Spare you were-” Cyclone took over, “Hangman, Star, I gave you an order. Stop what you’re doing.”

“Sir, you haven’t sent search and rescue. Rooster and Maverick could still be out there!” You said, not caring about getting in trouble. “We can’t send search and rescue with bandits in the air, Lieutenant Rogers!” “That’s why you send us to fly air cover.” “You don’t stand-”

“Sir, we’re receiving a signal from Rooster’s ESAT.”

Everyone stopped and listened.

“But there seems to be a malfunction.” The comms picked up Warlock’s voice, “Have you lost him?” “No, sir. He’s supersonic.”

You and Jake looked at each other, your smiles showing through your eyes since the masks covered your faces. “He’s airborne. He’s okay, Jake.” Hangman’s brows furrowed, “What is he in?”

“Sir. Overwatch reports an F-14 Tomcat is airborne born and on course for our position.”

Your jaw dropped, “Maverick.” You laughed, “Maverick’s alive!”

“Dagger Spare, be ready.”

****

It felt like forever before you heard anything from Rooster and Maverick.

“Where the hell is this guy?”

Jake nearly relaxed at the sound of Bradley’s voice but it was the panic in it that made him hesitate.

“He’s on our nose.”

Your stomach dropped, “No, no, no…”

“Damn it, we’re out of ammo.” You shook your head, not wanting this to be real.

“Smoke in the air! Rooster, flares!” “That was close!”

“We’re out of flares, Mav!”

“Hangman, they’re in trouble, we have to go now,” you said, snapping your mask back on. “Cyclone-”

“This is not good!” Rooster’s panicked voice cut Jake off. “We took another hit!” “No, no, no, no, no!”

You ripped your mask off, “We have to go, now, Jake! If we wait for orders, they will get shot down. If we go now, we have a chance to save them.” He hesitated. “You were willing to risk your career earlier. Why are you hesitating now?” You sighed, “I’ll take every bit of blame.”

He looked at you over his shoulder, “You’d seriously do that? Risk your career, just like that?” “Yes. Especially if it means saving those I care about.” Jake looked in your eyes and knew you were serious.

In moments, you were airborne with Cyclone reprimanding you over the radio. “Seresin, Rogers, what the hell are you doing?” “Saving our friends.” “I didn’t give you the order-” “With all due respect, sir, you took too long.” He sighed, “Save them and get your asses back on this boat. I’ll deal with you when you land.”

****

As you and Jake flew to their location, all you heard was Maverick screaming at Rooster to eject.

“Rooster, pull the handle! Eject!” “It’s not working!”

Jake pressed harder, willing the plane to go faster.

“Mav!”

Your heart drops when you hear a missile lock through the radio. But then, Jake gets a lock on the enemy and he fires just as they do.

You relax back into your seat, “Holy shit…” You let out a laugh in disbelief, “Holy shit…”

Jake’s grinning behind his mask as he goes through the smoke, “Good, afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. This is your savior speaking. Please fasten your seat belts, return your tray tables to their locked and upright positions.” Rooster’s laugh sounded through the comms. “And prepare for landing.”

Maverick pounded the glass and gave you and Jake a thumbs up.

“Hey, Hangman, you look good.” “I am good, Rooster. I’m very good.”

You rolled your eyes, “I’m here too, but yeah compliment the pilot.” “Star! You look good too-” You laughed good naturedly, “Save it, bird brain.” All of them laughed.

“It’s good to see you. And Maverick, if you keep pulling shit like that, Nick Fury is gonna make you an Avenger.” Maverick laughed and shook his head before Jake turned the plane, “We’ll see you back on deck.”

****

You and Jake landed, parking the aircraft as Maverick and Rooster landed.

You both got out, hugging each other. “Thank you, for trusting me.” “Star, I’d be a fool not to trust you. I should be thanking you for trusting me as your pilot.” You just hugged him again.

You pulled away just in time for Bob to sweep you up in a hug and spin you around. “Bob! You did it! You guys did it!” 

He sat you down, breathing heavily, “I thought I told you not to do anything stupid? Disobeying orders? Really?” You just shrugged, grinning as Bob rolled his eyes and hugged you again.

You gave quick hugs to the others before Omaha got his hug and kiss. “I can’t wait to get you on dry land again, Y/N.” You kissed him again, “I look forward to it, Neil. But let’s go see Bradley, yeah?” He nodded and turned his back to you, “Hop on hero.” You rolled your eyes, laughing as you jumped onto his back.

When you got there, you stopped by Mav first, seeing the four other strike team members with Rooster.

Neil sat you down and went over to Rooster.

“Captain?” Maverick quickly turned around and smiled at you. “Star.” He pulled you in for a hug, “Hondo told me what you did. What you and Hangman did.” He pulled back to look at you, “Why? Why would you risk your career by disobeying orders?”

You held eye contact, “Because last time I obeyed orders, someone got killed. I wasn’t gonna let that happen again. I can’t lose anymore family.” Maverick could only nod before pulling you back in for a hug, “Thank you.”

He pulled away and patted your shoulder, nodding to the other pilot, “Go see Rooster.” You nodded saluting him before going to see your friend.

When you got there, he was talking to Jake and shaking his hand.

“Chalked yourself another kill.” “That makes two,” Jake said, fighting back a grin. “Mav has five. Makes him an ace,” Phoenix added teasingly.

Bradley and Jake just shared a look and you waited for Jake to make his move.

But he just hugged Phoenix. “Oh- Jake c’mon!” You groaned quietly before going up to Bradley.

“Bradshaw,” you said as you stood in front of him. He smiled down at you, “Rogers.” You sighed before hugging him tightly, him doing the same. “I’m so glad you’re okay.” “Me too.. Me too..”

You pulled away and Bradley looked over at Jake who was waiting off to side for you both to go talk to Cyclone.

Noticing, you pulled him back into a hug that he reciprocated, “Tell him, Bradley. You’ll regret it if you don’t.” You let go and walked towards Jake, sending a smile over your shoulder to Rooster who nodded and went to find Maverick.

****

“Lieutenant Seresin, Lieutenant Rogers.” You and Jake stood in front of Cyclone at attention. “Admiral Simpson.” He took in a deep breath, “You disobeyed my orders to wait, Lieutenant Seresin.”

You took a step forward, ready to take the blame, “Sir, it’s not-”

“I know, sir. But I couldn’t, in good conscience, wait to be told to take off.” You looked up at Jake, “Hangman-” “Lieutenant Rogers and I decided that if we hadn’t left when we had, Captain Mitchell and Lieutenant Bradshaw would not have made it home. The responsibility falls on both of us.”

You shook your head, “It was my idea, Hangman. What are you doing?” “I didn’t have to listen to you. It was my choice, Star. I’m just as much to blame.”

Cyclone arched a brow at both of you before sighing to gain your attention.

“While I have everything I need to ground both of you. I’m not going to. You’re both right. Had you waited for my order, we would have lost two pilots today. Just don’t let it happen again. Alright?” Both you and Jake nodded, “Yes sir.” “Yes sir.” “Dismissed.”

Both you and Jake exited the room and hugged each other, “Let’s go celebrate!”

********

A few days later you were all back on dry land and celebrating on the beach with a bonfire/cookout.

Neil had his arm around your waist, “Have you heard from Sam or Bucky?” You nodded and rested your head on his shoulder, “Yeah, it’s been a while though, last I heard they went to Madripor on a lead. They could be anywhere now.” He just nodded and sipped his drink.

Then Jake came up to you. “Star, I need your help.” You walked away from the pit and turned to him.

“What’s up?” “I’m gonna tell him. I’m gonna tell Rooster.” You grinned, “That’s great! I’m happy for you, Jake.” He nodded, hands on his hips. “There’s just one small problem.” You hummed, “And that is?” “I suck at expressing my feelings without being an asshole.” “I think that’s obvious.” He groaned, “Just help me!”

You held your hands up in defense, “Okay, okay.” You looked over at Bradley, “Just tell him. You’re great with words, Jake.” “But what if I fumble-” You noticed Bradley walked over. 

You grabbed Hangman’s hands, “Jake, you’ll be okay.” You squeezed them, “Trust me.” He looked in your eyes, searching for any sign of malicious intent, and found none. “Okay,” he hugged you. “Thank you.” “Go get him, Cowboy.”

You smiled at him before walking back to Omaha. “Is he gonna tell him?” You glanced back over to see them talking to each other and smiled. “I think so.”

Just before you turned around, Jake grabbed Bradley’s face and kissed him. You smiled and turned around, happy for your friends.

They came over not too long later, hand in hand. Everyone noticed but didn’t say anything, only smiling and nodding to the two in congratulations.

Fanboy came over to you, “Star, have you seen the news since we got back?” You tilted your head, “Not really no.” He gulped and showed you his phone, “You probably should.”

You gasped at the title on his screen and pulled out your own phone.

There it was, the article of a lifetime on your lockscreen. It was recent, the article, but the video attached looked about a day old.

You pulled it up and watched it, your chest burning and the feeling of bile rising in your throat.

This was bad.

*********

hi guys! sorry it took so long to get this part out. but i hope you enjoyed!

HANGSTER IS OFFICIAL!!!!

but that do we think star saw? what was that article about and how will star react? how will the rest of the squad react? 

i hope to get more into the events of falcon and the winter soldier now that we’ve wrapped up with the mission so stay tuned for part 7!!

let me know if you want to be added to my top gun taglist or the lieutentant rogers taglist 

top gun tags <33: @milesdickpic @roosterscockpit @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @malindacath @bananas1234 @mallerz @twsssmlmaa​

*************** *Wednesday*

You all sat in the ready room listening to the coms of the current run through.

“This mission is damn near impossible with these parameters,” Fritz said as he flopped onto the couch. You sighed and sat on the barstool close to the radio facing Jake. 

“It’s the only way everyone has a chance to get out alive,” you sighed, placing your helmet on the bar. Rooster huffed and shook his head, but no one said anything about it.

“Talk to me, Bob.” “We are 12 seconds late on target. We gotta move! We gotta move!” “Copy. Try to stay with me.” 

The radar could be heard beeping through the radio. 

“Huh? Wait, who’s that?” Bob’s confused voice rang out. “Blue team. You’ve been spotted.” “Shit, it’s Maverick,” Coyote cursed. 

You stretched in your seat, “Here we go.”

“What the hell is he doing here?” Phoenix’s question was valid, Mav hadn’t flown with them the past two days. He was only out there today in case a bandit happened to engage them. 

“I’m a bandit on course to intercept. What’re you gonna do?” “He’s 20 miles left. Ten o’clock. 700 knots closure,” Bob offered to help the two pilots diverge a plan. 

Coyote turned his head, “Your call. What do you wanna do?” “Continue. We’re close. Stay on target.” Bob kept his eyes on Mav, “He’s swinging around to the north!” “Stand by for pop-up.” “Be ready on that laser, Bob.” “Copy. I’m on it.”

“Blue team, bandit is still closing,” Mav reminded. You tensed in your seat and looked at Hangman, seeing his teeth clenched around a toothpick. “You might get splinters there, Cowboy.” He rolled his eyes and focused back on the radio.

“Popping now!” The grunts of the change in trajectory could be heard before Coyote spoke again. “Talk to me, Bob! Where’s Maverick?” “He’s five miles out. He’s coming fast.” “Target’s in sight,” Phoenix said. “Where’s my laser, Bob?” “Deadeye! Deadeye! It’s no good! Sorry, I can’t get a lock!” 

You groaned and hung your head. No one could hit the damn thing. “We’re out of time, I’m droppin’ blind.” No one spoke for a second. “Damn it! Missed!”

Now they were in the high-G climb out. Grunts and gasps were heard, causing you, Rooster, and Hangman to tense; each one of you had a best friend in the air.

Tone was heard, “That’s tone.” “Maverick’s got missile lock on us,” Bob said. “Shit. We’re dead,” Phoenix cursed. “Blue team, that’s a fail. Level out, Coyote.” 

Hangman sat upright, his chest slowly increasing in rhythm with the silence. 

“Coyote. Do you copy?” More silence. “Come on, Coyote…” “Coyote, come in.” Nothing. “Coyote. Level wings.”

That’s when Jake started to panic. “Snap out of it, Machado. Come on!” “Oh, God. He’s in G-LOC.” “Get the fuck out of it, Javy,” Hangman was clenching his fist. 

You reached over and grabbed his hand, allowing him to seek something to ground him. Maverick called out to Coyote, but it was useless.

“He’s gonna burn in!” 

Phoenix’s words made Jake shoot up out of his seat like it burned him. “I’m going after him.” Mav’s words were lost to the blond as you tried to calm him down.

“Hangman! Hang- Seresin! Jake, Jake look at me!” He did, green eyes surrounded by red. “You have got-” “Rogers, if you tell me to ‘calm down’ I swear-” 

You could hear Maverick, the room was dead quiet except for Hangman’s panicked breathing. He was trying to get a tone. Jake nearly sprinted out of the room, you held him back. Even with the enhanced strength, Hangman’s adrenaline made it difficult.

“He’s got tone,” Rooster said. “Snap out of it, Coyote. Come on! Come on!” The panic in Mav’s voice didn’t ease anyone’s nerves. 

“Damn it! Coyote! Coyote!” “Pull up! Pull up!” The automated voice in the aircraft mixed with Maverick’s, both trying to get Javy’s attention.

Silence.

Jake clenched at your flight suit. “God, please. Please.” “Coyote, you okay? You okay?” Jake and Javy breathed at the same time, “I’m okay. I’m good.” Jake hugged you, “Thank God.” “Good. Good. That’s enough for today.”

Everyone relaxed.

“That was close.” “Too close.”

Then shit hit the fan.

“Bird strike! Bird strike!” “Bird strike!” The sound of alarms and Phoenix’s voice made both you and Rooster panic. “Phoenix! Left engine’s on fire!” The panic in Bob’s voice made air catch in your throat. “Climbing!”

Even though Hangman was still recovering, he was fast to come to your aid, keeping an eye on Rooster out of the corner of his eye.

The blood rushing in both yours and Rooster’s ears blocked out anything happening on the radio. You looked at Rooster and there was nothing but panic in his eyes. You reached a hand out, urging at Rooster to grab it and he did.

While no one was calm in that room, you and Rooster were the worst. 

Bob has been your best friend since the academy, was there for you when your father was on the run and you needed a place to go for the holidays. He took you to his family's house and now you really hoped you didn’t have to deliver the news to his mom and brothers…

“We’re goin’ down, Phoenix! We’re goin’ in! We’re goin’ in!”

Your knees buckled and Hangman caught you, easing you to the ground, Rooster clinging onto both your hand and the foosball table. 

Omaha was by your side in a matter of milli-seconds. “Star. Y/N, Y/N look at me, come on Doll. Look at me.”

You tried to let go of Rooster’s hand, in fear of breaking it. But he gripped it, “Please don’t.” Rooster had never experienced this before, but you had. Didn’t make it any less terrifying.

You heard the mumbled shouts to eject and then the shouts of them ejecting. But it wasn’t registering, not until Coyote came over.

“I see chutes! I see chutes!”

Everyone else in the room instantly calmed. But you and Rooster were still fuzzy-eyed with erratic breathing. You both had experience here, just cause there's a chute doesn’t mean they survived.

********

It felt like hours before Maverick and Coyote were on the ground with rescue out for Phoenix and Bob.

Your boots were on the ground, running just behind Jake as he gripped Coyote in a hug. “Holy shit! I’m so glad you’re okay.” 

Everyone gave their concerns to Coyote before Hangman was dragging him to go to the hospital, ‘just in case’. “Everyone get changed, we’re done for the day. As soon as I hear, I’ll let you know.” Everyone nodded and went to change.

You turned to leave, but you took a glance back at Maverick and saw that he didn’t move. “Oma, you go. I’m gonna stay here.” 

Neil furrowed his brow in concern, but with a nod to Maverick he understood. “Okay, I’ll wait for you.” You nodded and squeezed his hand.

Maverick heard your footsteps. “Star, what are you doing?” 

“I didn’t want you to be alone.” “I’m fine.” You shook your head, “With all due respect, sir, you’re a horrible liar. Maverick, that couldn’t have been easy. To see it happen from an outside perspective.” He shook his head, a shaky exhale leaving him, “It wasn’t. God, I wish-” 

“Mav, this wasn’t your fault.” “Then why does it feel like it is?” 

You swallowed, “Because you still blame yourself. And I know that no matter what you’re told, you will always believe that it was your fault.” He scoffed, “Sounds like you speak from experience.” You nodded, looking down, “It’s because I am.” He frowned a little, but nodded.

The helicopter landed, wheeling out two gurneys to the ambulances, both in the upright position with semi conscious pilots. The tension melted away, the fear dissipated. 

They were alive.

You both jogged over, the head medic meeting you half-way. 

“They’re gonna be okay. Maybe a little sore, but they’re gonna be fine. We’re gonna take them to the hospital where they’re gonna keep them for observation overnight.” You both nodded. “Can we visit them?” He nodded, “Yes, once they’ve been admitted.” 

He turned to Mav, “Also, Lieutenant Machado needs to be examined after going into G-LOC.” “Lieutenant Seresin has seen to it that Lieutenant Machado does just that.” The medic nodded and left.

You patted Maverick’s shoulder. “Come on. They’re okay. Let’s let everyone know and go see them.” Mav nodded and followed you.

Once you got to the locker room, those in there looked up at the two of you.

Omaha held eye contact with you and you smiled, nodding, “They’re okay. They’re gonna be in observation until tomorrow, but they’re okay.” He embraced you and everyone sighed in relief.

Maverick looked around, “Where’s Rooster?” “He changed and went to the classroom,” Payback told him. Mav clenched his jaw and looked at you, wanting you to go with him to talk to Bradley. 

“This, this you need to do alone, Mav.” He just nodded and left to go talk to Bradley.

“Has someone contacted Hangman?” You asked as you changed. “No, not yet.” You grabbed your phone, “Okay, I got it.” You sent a quick text to Jake to let him know they were okay.

When you finished getting ready, Neil was waiting outside for you. “Come on, Star-light. I know you want to go talk to them.”

******

The next day wasn’t what you thought it would be.

Admiral Kazansky had passed and you, along with the rest of the squad, were attending the funeral. 

You had only gotten to know the Admiral over the last few years, but you had admired his work since before joining the Navy. He became sort of a father figure to you while you lived in North Island. 

When Steve died, Sarah was the first person you called after Neil. They had both gotten the chance to meet your father at some point so you reached out to invite them to his funeral, and they came.

So, being there was like burying your father all over again. Taps, the flag folding, it was hard. But you pushed through, and once it was over, after giving your condolences to the family and Maverick, you went home and stayed on the couch.

*******

The next day you were back to training.

As you sat next to Rooster, Cyclone walked up to the front, causing both of you to share a look.

“Captain Mitchell is no longer your instructor. And as of today, there are new mission parameters. Time to target is now four minutes. You’ll be entering the valley level at reduced speed. Not to exceed 420 knots.” 

Everyone shared a look of disbelief and doubt, Bob being the one to voice concerns. “Sir, won’t we be giving their planes time to intercept?” “Well, Lieutenant, you have a fighting chance against enemy aircraft. What are the odds of surviving a head-on collision with a mountain?” 

You shook your head and picked at your fingers, someone won’t come home from this.

“You’ll be attacking the target from a high altitude, level with the north wall. Gonna be a little harder to keep your lase on target, but you will avoid the high-G climb out.”

You saw Fanboy whisper something to Payback out of the corner of your eye, “We’ll be sitting ducks for enemy missiles…”

You sighed and spoke up, “Sir, if we couldn’t hit the target from right above it, how can we be so sure that we’d hit it from even further away even at reduced speed?” Cyclone opened his mouth but the simulator was activated.

An F-18 single was running the course. “Who the hell is that?” You smirked, there was only one person it could be.

“Maverick to Range Control. Entering Point Alpha. Confirm green range.” “Uh, Maverick, Range Control, uh, green range is confirmed. I don’t see an event scheduled for you, sir.” 

Everyone was sitting up in their seats. “Well, I’m going anyway.” You huffed out an amused laugh and sat on the edge of your seat.

“Setting time to target: two minutes 15 seconds.” “2:15, that’s impossible,” Payback said. You shook your head, catching the smug look on Hangman’s face. “Final attack point. Maverick’s inbound.” The simulation started and everyone was watching.

Hangman leaned back in his seat, waiting to watch his instructor fail at what he couldn’t even accomplish. Except you knew better, you found it a little humorous that Jake was so cocksure of himself.

The timer ran down and everyone was holding their breath. Maverick cleared the canyon and was approaching the pop up. “Popping in: three, two, one.” 

Hangman leaned forward in his seat, Rooster straightened and leaned on his knees, you were nearly out of your seat with a smile on your face.

You all watched him lock on the target. “Bombs away.” The clock continued to count down and you, along with a few others, stood all the way up.

As Mav climbed in G’s you watch the two missiles hit the target. “Bull’s-eye! Holy shit!” Fanboy said, high-fiving his pilot. “Yes,” Bob cheered in front of you.

*******

After the surprise rain and Maverick talking with Cyclone about stealing the plane, the three walked into the classroom.

“Aviators, after proving he could complete the course within the original parameters and in less time, Captain Mitchell has been appointed team leader for this mission,” Warlock explained. “You are dismissed, go home and get some rest. We leave tomorrow.”

*******

You came into the living room to see Neil on the couch, elbows on his knees and fists to his mouth. “Neil, baby, you okay?” He turned to you with red rimmed eyes and shaking shoulders as he sighed. You sat down and rubbed his back. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

Omaha sniffled and ran a hand down his face, “I’m just nervous. For the mission.” “I am too, Baby. I am too. What’s makin’ you nervous?” 

Now, neither of you knew who was going on the mission and that made it even more worrying. “Just a bunch of ‘what if’s.” You brought a hand up to cup his face. “Talk to me, Honey.”

And just like that, he spilled every thought that had been running through his mind. Everything from: ‘what if he gets chosen and you don’t’ to ‘what if you get chosen and he doesn’t’ to ‘what if you’re both chosen’ to ‘what if neither of you are chosen’.

“I don’t want you to fly this mission… because I know that you will not hesitate to sacrifice yourself if it came down to it, especially if it were me or Bob. But I’m not gonna tell Maverick that you can’t be chosen, because you are a damn good pilot Y/N and I know how bad you want this.” 

You and Neil had always been honest with each other, you couldn’t afford to lie or keep secrets.

You nodded and pushed his hair out of his face, smiling as you spoke, “Thank you for telling me. But-” Without warning he surged forward and kissed you, like a desperate kiss. You kissed back, pouring your love into it.

“Promise me-” “Neil-” “Please, promise that you’ll come back to me…” You shuddered a little against him. 

You never verbally made promises to each other, knowing that tomorrow was never guaranteed. But now, with this mission that you were told from the beginning is expected to have casualties, he was breaking that unspoken rule. “Please…” You nodded, nudging his nose with yours, “Only if you promise…” He nodded, pecking your lips, “I promise.” You hummed, “I promise.”

************

i know the title is a little weird, so it’s subject to change.

but i hope you enjoyed this part, i can’t give you an ETA on part 6 at the moment but i’ve started it.

but do you guys have any perdictions on the mission and what is gonna happen next? let me know! :D

tags <3 (i will also put these in the comments in case the didn’t work): @milesdickpic @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp​

************

“We need to tell Y/N,” Bucky said as he walked alongside Sam. “Hell no,” Sam said immediately. “Why not? She needs to know!” “No, she does not. She is training, and this is not her problem.” “She’s a super soldier, just like them.” “Well, technically she’s a super pilot, not a soldier.” Bucky rolled his eyes.

“Sorry about Redwing,” Bucky said after a few minutes of silence. “No you’re not,” Sam said. He looked over at Bucky, “What’s going on in the big cyborg brain of yours?” 

“It’s computing,” Buck replied flatly, making Sam chuckled. “You know what? I can actually see it. I can see the gears turning. Ope, they’re malfunctioning, shuttin’ down. Yep, they’re on fire.” 

Bucky ignored his teasing, “We gotta figure out where the serum’s coming from.” “Yeah. And how in the hell after 80 years are there 8 super soldiers runnin’ loose?”

A truck pulled up beside them, honking.

“So that didn’t go as planned, huh?” John said from the back. 

Sam and Bucky barely glanced as they kept walking. 

“Okay. Let’s keep going.” The car rolled forward, staying in front of the two.

“Look, at least we know what we’re up against now, huh? And we’re pretty sure it’s one of the big three, so..” John continued. “Aliens, androids, or wizards?” “Pretty sure.” 

Bucky shook his head and scoffed, “There’s no such thing as wizards.” John nodded, “Alright, then it’s aliens, or androids.” Sam finally turned his head, “Or super soldiers.” 

“Shit, super soldiers. For real?” The other guy in the truck said. “Yeah.” “Wow. Alright. Then we work together.” “That’s not happening,” Bucky said bluntly.

John sighed, “I think we stand a much better chance if we all just-” Bucky cut him off, “Just 'cause you carry that shield, it doesn't mean you're Captain America.” He was fuming on the inside, but just mildly annoyed on the outside. “Look, I've done the work, okay?” John was becoming impatient. “You ever jump on top of a grenade?” Bucky challenged.

Walker didn’t miss the chance to brag, “Yeah. Actually, I have. Four times. It's a thing I do with my helmet. It's a reinforced helmet. It's a long story, but, any… Look, it's 20 miles to the airport. You guys need a ride. Guys. Gary, stop. Get in.” 

Okay, you gotta give the man credit for trying to be friendly but he was doing it for the wrong reasons.

Bucky and Sam shared a look before begrudgingly climbing into the truck.

And the talking started immediately. “Okay, so we've got eight Super Soldiers on a bulk supply run. Why?” Sam sighed, knowing there was no way around trying to work with him, “They say their mission is to get things back to the way it was during The Blip. Maybe they're just trying to help.” “They had a funny way of showing it,” Bucky voiced.

“That serum doesn't exactly have a great track record. No offense.” John was already approaching their last nerve, that stepped right on it. But they continued to be cordial.

Well, Sam did, Bucky was just staring.

“We need to figure out where they're going. How'd you track 'em here? The Flag Smashers?” Sam asked, looking between the two. “Uh, no, we didn't track them, we tracked you, uh, through Redwing,” the guy next to John said, scratching his neck. 

“You hacked my tech?”

John chuckled, seemingly amused by Sam’s frustration, “Sorry. It's not exactly hacking. It's government property. Kind of the government.” Bucky just stared at him, pondering how someone had that much audacity dare carry the shield. 

“Does he always just stare like that?” Sam glanced at Bucky before looking back at Walker, “You get used to it.”

“Okay, look,” John cleared his throat, “you know, things have gotten kind of, uh…” “Chaotic.” “Yeah. The GRC, they're doing the best they can to get things up and running smoothly, post Blip.” “Reactivating citizenship, social security, healthcare. Basically just managing resources for the refugees who were displaced by the return.” Sam nodded, “The Global Repatriation Council does all that. I get that. So why exactly are you two here?”

The man next to John continued to explain, “Well, they provide the resources and we keep things stable.” John chimed in, “Yeah, violent revolutionaries aren't usually good for anyone's cause.” “Usually said by the people with the resources.” John nodded, “We got a lot of resources. If you guys, if you joined up with us, we could-”

“No,” Bucky bluntly cut Walker off, firm in his decision. 

“I got mad respect for both of y'all. But you were getting your asses kicked till we showed up.” Bucky looked at him, “Who are you?” “Lemar Hoskins.” Sam scoffed, “Look, I see a guy hanging out of a helicopter in tactical gear, I need a lot more than Lemar Hoskins.” “I’m ‘Battlestar’. John’s partner.” Bucky really couldn’t believe what he was hearing, “‘Battlestar’?” Bucky nodded, turning to the front, “Stop the car!”

The driver, Gary, stopped at a rest point. 

“Look, I-I get it, okay? I get the attitude, I do. You didn't think that the shield was gonna end up here. I get it, Bucky,” John called out, but Bucky ignored him. He sighed and turned to Sam, “And I'm-I'm not trying to be Steve. I'm not trying to replace Steve. I'm just trying to be the best Captain America I can be. That's it.” 

He hoped to get Sam on board, “It'd be a whole lot easier if I had Cap's wingmen on my side.”

Scoffing, Sam moved to get out, “It’s always that last line.” 

He shut the door, not thinking about the next words that came out of his mouth, “If you really want support, you need it from more than just Cap’s ‘wingmen’.” Sam shook his head and followed after Bucky.

*********

“Good morning. The uranium enrichment plant that is your target will be operational earlier than expected. Raw uranium will be delivered to the plant in ten days’ time. As a result, your mission has been moved up one week-” Everyone tensed in their seats. “-in order to avoid contaminating the target valley with radiation.”

“Sir,” Coyote spoke up from behind where you were seated beside Hangman. “No one here has successfully flown a low-level course.” You nodded a little as you moved your eyes from Coyote to Warlock. “Nevertheless, you have been ordered to move on. Captain.”

Maverick walked up, “We have one week left to focus on phase two. It’s the most difficult stage of the mission. It’s a pop-strike with a steep dive, requiring nothing less than two consecutive miracles.” You shifted in your seat and flexed your hand. “Two pairs of F-18’s will fly in a welded wing formation. Teamwork. Precise coordination of these aircrafts is essential to both the mission’s success and your survival.”

You glanced up at Hangman to find him clicking his pen as he listened. 

“As you know, the plant rests between two mountains. On final approach, you’ll invert directly into a steep dive. This allows you to maintain the lowest possible altitude, and the only possible attack angle. Your target is an impact point less than 3 meters wide. The two seat aircraft will paint the target with a laser bull’s-eye. The first pair will breach the reactor by dropping a laser guided bomb on an exposed ventilation hatch. They will create an opening for the second pair. That’s miracle number one.”

You glanced over and shared a look with Bob, exhaling your nerves as you turned back to Mav. “The second team will deliver the kill shot and destroy the target. That’s miracle number two. If either team misses the target the mission is a failure.” You sucked in a breath as you popped your knuckles. “Egress is a steep high-G climb out to avoid hitting this mountain.”

Jake spoke up next to you, having seemingly done the math in his head, “A steep climb out at that speed, you’re pulling at least eight G’s.” You shook your head, sitting up, “You’re pulling nine, maybe even ten G’s.” Maverick nodded. 

“The stress limit of the F-18’s airframes is 7.5.” Mav nodded again, looking at Rooster, “That’s the accepted limit. To survive this mission, you’ll pull beyond that, even if it means bending your airframe.”

He took a breath, turning back to the screen, “You’ll be pulling so hard, you’ll weigh close to 2,000 pounds, your skull crushing your spine, your lungs imploding like an elephant’s sitting on your chest, fighting with everything you can just to keep from blacking out. And this is where you’ll be the most vulnerable. This is Coffin Corner.”

Fanboy spoke up, “The only person that could maybe withstand that much force is Star.” Both you and Mav shook your heads. “It may not affect me as much as it would anyone else, but I’m not invincible. The serum boosts my metabolism, it doesn't create miracles.” Mav swallowed, nodding at you before continuing.

“Assuming you avoid crashing into this mountain, you’ll climb straight up into enemy radar while losing all of your airspeed. Within seconds you’ll be fired upon by enemy SAMs. You’ve all faced sustained G’s before, but this-this is gonna take you and your aircraft to your breaking point.” 

Phoenix spoke up, shaking her head slightly, “Sir, is this even achievable?” “The answer to that question will come down to the pilot in the box.”

*******

You just exited the locker room, sore, showered, and ready for some drinks after a long day of failing.

“Lieutenant Rogers,” Admiral Simpson poked his head out of his office. “I need a word, please.” You turned immediately and walked in, “Sir, did I-” “This has nothing to do with the mission, Star,” Warlock assured you.

“I don’t know if you were aware but Captain Walker stopped by wanting to have a word with you,” Cyclone said, crossing his arms and he leaned against his desk. You shook your head, “No, sir, I was not aware the Captain would be stopping by.” Cyclone nodded, “Understood. I sent him away as soon as I could.”

His scoff resembled an unamused chuckle, “He tried to use the ‘I’m Captain America’ card. I had to remind him that this was in fact the Navy and that it didn’t work here.” “Also, we’re Admirals, we out rank him anyway.” 

“We aren’t sure of how he found you. But we wanted you to be aware.” You nodded curtly, “Thank you, sirs. Am I dismissed?” They nodded and you went to the door.

“Star?” You turned, humming in acknowledgement. “We stand with you. We don’t appreciate how your wishes were disrespected, if there’s anything we can do. Let us know.” You smiled a little, nodding, “Thank you.”

Once you closed the door, you were fast walking out of the building going to your bike.

********

You laughed as you stood up straight, “Ha! Told you it’d go in!” “That’s what she said,” Fanboy mumbled behind his glass. You dropped your jaw, “Jar, Garcia, I heard that.” He groaned, “Damn your super hearing.” He placed a dollar in the jar.

As you leaned over to take your next shot, the bar became silent and the pilots around you stood stock still. 

You glanced up to see the anger on their faces. “Okay? What made you guys so sour all of a sudden?”

“Y/N Rogers?”

You froze. You’d recognize that voice anywhere. “You gotta be shittin’ me,” you grumbled to yourself.

Hangman, Omaha, and Harvard looked at you, silently asking if they needed to handle this. You shook your head and stood.

Being extra cautious of how you gripped the pool cue, you turned to face John Walker.

“That would be me.” The blond had a proud smile on his face and looked at Lemar who was next to him, “Told you she’d be here.” 

He cleared his throat and adjusted his suit. “John Walker. Captain America,” he stuck his hand out for you to shake.

The quiet scoffs from behind you went unnoticed by the man in blue. “I know who you are, John.” You jerked your head toward Lemar, “Who’s your friend?” “Lemar Hoskins, or ‘Battlestar’,” he said, nodding politely to you. “Nice to meet you, Lemar.”

John clears his throat, obviously not liking that you seemed to just overlook him. You look at him, giving him a once over, not missing the gun on his belt. “How can I help you boys?” You smirked a little at the way John’s jaw clenched.

“We’re trying to work with Sam and Bucky on a mission, they just don’t seem to respect or support us-“ “And you’re here to ask me to talk to them?” “Would you?” 

A laugh escaped your lips before you could catch it.

Walker furrowed his brow, “What’s so funny?” You took a deep breath to calm yourself, “It’s just, you think that I have any influence over two grown men. Like what I say to them might make them want to work with you. John, you might want to rethink your methods.” “Look, Y/N, all I’m asking for is just a little respect and support. It’d mean a lot if I could get it from you.” You nodded, passing your cue to Hangman before stepping forward.

As you opened your mouth, he spoke, “I understand that this isn’t what you expected, or even wanted. But I’m trying to do the best I can, and having you by my side would really help. What do you say?” 

He gave you a smile, one that he definitely thought could get him what he wanted.

“No,” you said, holding your head high, reveling in the way his smile dropped. “No?”

You crossed your arms, looking down at your boots before looking up at John. “Respect is not simply given, John. You have to earn it.” “I’m Captain America, everyone respects me.” 

Rooster laughed from behind you, causing you to smirk when Walker nearly gave himself whiplash to look at him. 

“Dude, if you didn’t notice, which I’m sure you did, nobody batted an eye when you walked in.”

Hangman looked around, “Yeah, and everyone is just kinda ignoring you. It’s a little embarrassing.” John's fingers twitched, but he made no move, knowing he was severely out matched and out numbered.

“Look, Walker, just because you carry that shield doesn’t mean you get respect from everyone at the drop of a hat. My father earned the respect he got. I’ll admit that you’ve done some good things, but that doesn’t make you a good person. It doesn’t mean you deserve the shield.” John nodded, “Oh, I see. I think I know what this is about.”

You opened your arms, inviting him to continue, “Please, do enlighten me.” 

“You wanted the shield and you’re mad they didn’t choose you.” You scoffed, “Oh, really? That’s why I’m upset? Listen, if I wanted the shield, I would have it. This is all about your attitude, and the fact you think you’re above everyone. My dad never thought that way. He was a nobody that was given a chance. He had a heart of pure fucking gold that was too big for his own good. He stood up to bullies, that’s why he was Captain America. You were chosen because of your achievements, not your heart.”

John opened his mouth to say something, but you cut him off. “You want my respect, go out there and fucking earn it. You want Sam and Bucky’s respect, you earn it. Have the day you deserve, John.” The look in your eyes had Walker biting his tongue and walking out, Lemar looking at you.

You shifted your gaze to him, “I understand he’s your friend, but he needed to be taken down a peg or two. Take care, Lemar.” “You too, Lieutenant.” You gave him a small smile as he walked out, wondering if was only here because John was his friend.

Turning back to your fellow aviators, you exhaled, shaking your head. 

“What a dick,” Halo piped up. You all chuckled, nodding in agreement. You held your hand out, Hangman placing the cue in your hand. “That was pretty badass, Star.”

“You’re lucky you had that handled, Penny was about to make him buy a round for the whole bar for that comment,” Phoenix informed you. “Yeah, her hands were itching to ring that bell,” Payback said, nodding towards the bar. “My hands were itching to knock his damn teeth in,” Coyote said, sipping his beer.

You smiled at the group, watching them move back to their previous activities. You were grateful to have them at your back just now.

Bob came up to you and rubbed your arm, Omaha coming up with him to place a hand on the small of your back. “Are you okay?” You nodded, “Yeah.” 

Your hands gripped the cue a little tighter as you twisted your hands around it. “I think I just need a drink, you can take over for me,” you passed the cue to Bob. They nodded and watched you make your way to the bar, turning back around when you made it there safely.

You stood at the bar, rubbing your temples. Penny noticed your presence and made a note to go over to you when she finished cashing out this patron’s tab.

Glancing over, you made sure none of the squad was paying attention and snuck out the back.

Except someone saw you. 

Maverick watched you push off the bar and make a bee-line to the beach. He watched Penny come back and notice that you had left. “Where’d she go?” Mav gestured to the door, “Outside. Put a drink for her on my tab, I’ll go talk to her.” Penny nodded and got the drink.

****

You sat in the sand, cross-legged and staring at the water. “I’m sorry, Dad…” You mumbled, moving your gaze to look at your hands, Steve’s dog tags tangled in your fingers.

Someone sat down beside you, not saying anything as they held out the bottle. “Thanks.” “No problem.” It was silent for a moment while you both took sips of your respective drinks.

“Hangman would have been a better fit,” you tried to make light of the situation and Mav chuckled. “Don’t let him hear you say that.” You huffed a laugh and took a gulp of your drink.

“You wanna talk about it?” Mav asked, not taking his eyes off the water. You chuckled dryly, “I think I voiced my opinion fairly well.” “Star…” You sighed, “I just- I want- I don’t know…”

You sniffled and rubbed your nose, “I wish I could let it go…” “But you can’t.” You shook your head, “No, I can’t.” “That’s okay. Some things you just can’t let go of,” Mav said, flexing his hand and moving his eyes away from the ocean. You knew he was referring to Goose and Rooster.

You brought your knees up, settling your bottle in the sand. “I feel like I let him down, you know,” you confessed, running your fingers over the raised metal of the tags. “That I should have fought Sam harder. Somehow proven to him that he was ready for it. That he was the Captain America this country needs, not the one it wants. Tell him that he had the ability to really make a difference.” 

Mav hesitantly rubbed your back, “I’m sure Sam had his reasons.” You nodded, “He did. And I respected his decision, I’m in no place to tell him how he should feel or what he should do.”

It was silent for a moment and you didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

You gestured back to the Hard Deck, “I appreciate you checkin’ on me, Mav. But go enjoy the rest of your night. We got a long day tomorrow.” He nodded, “It’s not a problem. If you need anything, don’t hesitate.” You gave him a small smile and watched him retreat to the bar.

As you turned back to the water you sighed and ran a hand down your face, bringing the bottle to your lips to finish it.

As you sat there, your phone rang. “Sam, hey.” “Hey, are you busy?” You shook your head, standing up and dusting the sand off, “Not at the moment, no. Heard you got to meet Walker. Would’ve been nice to have a heads up though.” “Heads up?” “Yeah, he showed up at the Hard Deck. If I don’t see him for another 70 years it’ll be too soon.” 

Sam covers his mouth on the other end, “Shit, he went to North Island?” “Actually he tried to talk to me at work. But the Admirals shooed him away. Then I gave him a piece of my mind about 20 minutes ago.” “I’m sorry, Y/N. I had no idea.” You sighed, “It’s fine. But I know you didn’t call about that, what’s going on?”

“Bucky got arrested.” “What?! Why?!” “He missed his court mandated therapy,” Sam explained. You pinched the bridge of your nose, “Why? He knows how important that is.” “He was with me in Germany. We were there on a lead. He wasn’t even supposed to be there.” You groaned and rubbed your face. “Is there anything I can do?” “No, I think his therapist is on her way.” 

You nodded, hand on your hip now, “Okay. Look, our mission got moved up a week, so I’m gonna be training a lot. So just keep an eye on him.” “Of course. I’ll keep you updated.” “Thanks. And Sam?” He hummed. “Be safe. Watch your six.” “You got it. Give ‘em hell, Star.” You both hung up and you went back to the bar.

********

Sam and Bucky walked outside of the police station. “Well, I feel better.” “I feel awful.”

A siren whooping and lights flashing caught their attention. They looked over to see John and Lamar leaning on a squad car. “Gentlemen.”

They glanced at each other before walking over.

“Good to see you again,” John greeted. He was awfully chipper for someone you just got his ass chewed out by his predecessor's daughter.

Neither spoke and just looked at him. “Look, if we divide ourselves, we don’t stand a chance, you guys know that.” John tried to reason, and he honestly thought getting Bucky out of jail would at least garner a little respect.

Sam spoke, crossing his arms, “So, what you got?” “Well, the leader’s name is Karli Morgenthau. We’ve been targeting civilians who’ve been helping Karli move from place to place,” John started. “They geotagged a location, then scrambled the signal. But our satellites have found their symbol popping up in various displacement communities all across Central and Eastern Europe,” Lamar continued.

“Mhm. We think she’s taking the medicine she just stole to one of these camps.” “Well, there are hundreds of those all over the planet since The Blip. So I guess you’ll have to look real hard,” Bucky smarted off. “Good thing I have 20/20 vision, huh?”

Bucky wasn’t having it, “Where is she now, Walker? Do you know?” “No, we don’t know, Bucky,” John said, frustration making his volume rise. “But, it’s only a matter of time before we find out.” “Things are really intense for you, aren’t they, Walker? Doesn’t help that you didn’t get your special approval from Y/N,” Bucky continued to antagonize.

Sam decided to step in, “Take it easy. Look, Walker’s right. It is imperative that we find them and stop them.” John stood up straight, thinking he finally got them on his side. Sam turned to him, “But you guys have rules of engagement and all kind of authorizations you have to get. Us, we’re free agents. We’re more flexible. So it wouldn’t make sense for us to work with you.” Sam and Bucky walked away.

“A word of advice, then,” John said, fed up with it all. They both turned back to him expectantly. “Stay the hell out of my way.” It was John and Lamar’s turn to walk away.

Bucky and Sam walked down the alley, “You really had to rub that in didn’t you?” Bucky just shrugged, “Well, he wasn’t really following her advice anyway.”

****************

okay... okay i know what you guys were thinking- why not just punch the bastard?

to be honest, i want to i REALLY wanted to - but i think a blow to a man’s ego is much more lethal than getting punched

plus, we don’t need to get in trouble for fighting ‘captain america’ and lose our chance at flying this mission

but regardless i hope you enjoyed!

tags <3: @milesdickpic @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp​