I know a crazy when I see one, because I am crazy.

At least that’s how you feel, even as you interact with the team daily. But they can all see it, your usually bubbly personality now quieter, fewer words and even less smiles. Bucky notices more than everybody, of course he does. He notices everything about you, the girl that lights up his entire life even when John is rage-baiting him and Alexei is being obnoxiously loud about some stupid thing and Ava and Yelena are trying to convince him to let them braid his hair like they did Bob’s. 

With everyone driving him crazy, your smile alone is his saving grace, even if he’d never admit it to anyone.

But now it’s like your light is dimming and he doesn’t like it. So he decides to take matters into his own hands and make sure you shine brightly again.

Just what you needed on top of an already crappy holiday, Valentina gave you the last mission before she allowed the team a break, meaning no more missions unless there were any emergencies.

Unluckily for you, your last mission was five full days of boring intel gathering, alone in a dingy hotel room while absolutely nothing happened with your target. Turns out he was just a real lonely guy with no reason to leave his house, not a terrorist hiding away in his rat hole.

By the time you make it back to the Watchtower it’s just after midnight of the 24th, officially Christmas Eve, but you feel anything but merry.

The common room lights are all off as you drop your gear near the couch, which is really unusual since they’re always on, or at least dimmed during the night, but never off completely.

You shrug it off, your exhausted mind completely focused on getting something to eat and then crash out in your room, maybe even for a couple of days and sleep right through Christmas.

When the lights in the kitchen don’t work either, though, you frown and start to wonder if something’s wrong with the tower.

You walk back into the common room and, as soon as you stand in the middle of the room, the TV comes alive by itself, a feed of a crackling fire playing.

“What the–” You start when suddenly Christmas lights hang over the TV light up and spell ‘Merry Christmas’ in colorful letters.

You’re startled and confused, but barely have time to process when other lights start turning on all around you until the living room is full of them, so many different coloured lights and a tree so big and colorful that it would put Rockefeller Center to shame.

You almost can’t believe what you’re seeing as you turn around in your place, looking in awe at all the lights, and after you did a full 280 two or three times, you freeze when you’re facing the TV again.

You thought the team would all be asleep by now, but here they all are, standing in front of the Christmas socks with all your names hung under the TV.

Your mouth falls open a little when you notice them all wearing matching ugly Christmas sweaters, some begrudgingly, and Christmas pajama pants, Santa hats or other ridiculous Christmas headwear.

Bucky is standing front and center with a wide smile and Reindeer antlers with bells and bows that make you giggle through the tears welling up in your eyes.

“What…?” That’s all you can get out as you take in the scene in front of you, but no other words come out because your brain is having trouble processing. 

“You can’t be the only one not matching, doll.” Bucky says simply as he walks up to you with a sweater and pajama pants to match the team’s like that’s the only thing that matters right now.

You look down at the clothes in his hands then at him and back, shaking your head in disbelief, or maybe to clear your mind enough to talk.

“What’s going on?” You finally manage to get out as you look back at him, your eyes wide and still confused.

Bucky doesn’t answer for a second, committing to memory the image of you right now, still dishevelled from your mission and clearly tired from the trip back, but your eyes are filling with tears that reflect all the colorful lights around you and the look in your face is nothing short of one of wonder an actual kid would have on Christmas.

“It’s Christmas Eve.” Bucky says softly and gestures back to the team, some like Yelena and Avalook not so happy to be doing this, mostly because of the ridiculous clothes and accessories, but they’re all still there doing this for you. “We’re a family… We’re your family.”

“I…” You have no idea what to say, barely having time to react before she ushers you towards the bathroom.

You change in a daze and when you come out the team is mostly in the kitchen prepping what look like Christmas cookies, except for Bucky who’s waiting for you right outside the bathroom with something behind his back.

“There we go…” He grins after he reaches up and puts a headband with a Santa hat with bells in your hair. “Perfect.”

You just look up at him for a moment before your brain finally starts working again and words come out.

“I didn’t think the team cared about Christmas.” You say quietly.

“We mostly don’t…” He concedes and gently rubs your arms. “But I care about you.”

“You did all of this?” You ask almost in awe.

“I’d do anything for you.” He says softly now, his hands come up to your shoulders.

“Now…” He gently turns you and steers you into the kitchen as you giggle. “Let’s have some family time.”

The entire team spends the whole night up, making cookies and mostly disasters but laughing like idiots at the mess you make with a background of Christmas classics.

On Christmas day, you take shifts cooking and then have dinner all together, like a real family, then sit around the living room with hot cocoa and the cookies you made while watching Christmas movies, each of you getting to choose one.

You fall asleep on the couch, your head on Bucky’s shoulder with his arm around you and a blanket covering you both.

He looks down at you with a soft smile, taking in the finally serene expression on your face after all the laughter in the last two days alone.

“World governments are in pieces.” Natasha says next. “The parts that are still working are trying to take a census and it looks like he did… He did exactly what he said he was gonna do. Thanos wiped out… 50% of all living creatures.”

Everyone looks devastated. Hopeless, even. You all lost a lot.

“Where is he now?” Tony suddenly asks. “Where?”

“We don’t know.” Steve answers while looking down at his feet. “He just… Opened a portal and walked through.”

Tony sighs and points through the glass at Thor sitting leaning with his elbows on his knees, fiddling with his hands and glancing at you as you squeeze his shoulder. “What’s wrong with him?”

“Oh, he’s pissed. He thinks he failed.” Rocket answers from his spot in front of the glass near you and Tony’s eyes snap to him as he adds, “Which, of course, he did, but there’s a lot of that going around, ain’t there?”

Tony looks at him for a moment before just answering with, “Honestly, until this exact second, I thought you were a Build-A-Bear.”

“Maybe I am.” Rocket takes it in stride, even if you’re sure he has no idea what a Build-A-Bear even is.

Before you can make a comment about it though, Steve goes back to business.

“We’ve been hunting Thanos for three weeks now. Deep space scans… Satellites, and we got nothing.” He pauses. “Tony. You fought him–”

“Who told you that?” Tony interrupts him and everyone’s attention turns to the malnourished scientist. “I didn’t fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while the Bleecker Street magician gave away the stone. That’s what happened. There was no fight, ‘cause he’s not beatable.”

“Did he give you any clues?” Steve tries again. “Any coordinates, anything?”

“Uh…” Tony sputters and salutes mockingly. “I saw this coming a few years back.”

Tony starts and you just know you’re headed for another meltdown like with Charlie during the Accords discussion. You share a look with Natasha through the glass but nobody interrupts. “I had a vision. I didn’t want to believe it. Thought I was dreaming.”

Steve, as always, doesn’t give up and tries to make Tony reason. “Tony, I’m gonna need you to focus.”

“And I NEEDED you.” Tony says sharply now. “As in, past tense. That trumps what you need. It’s too late, buddy. Sorry.” He adds sarcastically.

“You know what I need?” Tony knocks over the bowl in front of him. “I need a shave.” He stands up. “And I believe I remember telling all youse…” He slurs as he rips off his IV.

“Tony, Tony!” Rhodey tries to stop him but the millionaire keeps going. “Alive and otherwise, that what we needed was a suit of armor around the world, remember that? Whether it impacted your precious freedoms or not. That’s what we needed.”

“Well, that didn’t work out, did it?” Steve reminds him but Tony isn’t deterred.

“I said we’d lose.” He keeps going. “You said, ‘We’ll do that together, too.’ Well, guess what, Cap? We lost. And you weren’t there.”

Steve sighs softly but Tony isn’t finished. “But that’s what we do, right? Our best work after the fact?” He starts losing his balance and Rhodey keeps him up. “We’re the Avengers? We’re the ‘Avengers’, not the Prevengers?”

“Okay.” Rhodey says as Tony keeps asking rhetorical questions. “You made your point, just sit down, okay?”

“Okay, no no, here’s my point. You know what? She’s great, by the way.” Tony points at Carol while Rhodey tries to get him to sit down but Tony just keeps rambling. “We need you. You’re new blood. Bunch of tired old mules–”

He manages to get away from Rhodey and steps up to Steve, getting up in his face. “I got nothing for you, Cap. I got no coordinates, no clues, no strategies, no options. Zero, zip, nada, no trust… Liar.”

Tony tears the arc reactor off his chest and shoves it in Steve’s hand while breathing heavily. “Here, take this. You find him, you put that on… You hide.”

He’s clearly trying to be intense, maybe even intimidating, but his voice is shaking with exertion and his legs give in after a second.

“Tony!” Steve, and everyone else, tries to step in to help him as you yourself stand up too.

“I’m fine…” Tony tries to wave you all off right before he drops to the floor entirely, now passed out.

As Pepper sits on the side of Tony’s bed, Rhodey takes off his glasses and sets them aside on the bedside table before he goes out to the sitting area where you, Steve, Natasha and Carol are.

“Bruce gave him a sedative.” He informs you all. “He’s gonna probably be out for the rest of the day.”

“You guys take care of him.” Carol says. “And I’ll bring him a Xorridian Elixir when I come back.”

With that, she turns around and starts walking away. Before you can ask what the hell is a Xorridian Elixir, Steve speaks up first.

“Where are you going?” He asks.

“To kill Thanos.” She says simply without stopping. You, Natasha and Steve share looks before you all follow Carol.

“Hey.” Natasha says and Carol turns around. “You know, we usually work as a team here and, between you and I, morale’s a little fragile.”

“We realize up there is more your territory, but this is our fight too.” Steve adds.

“You even know where he is?” Rhodey asks from where he leans against the doorway.

“I know people who might.” Carol answers.

“Don’t bother.” Everyone turns to Nebula as she speaks up for the first time. “I can tell you where Thanos is.”

“Thanos spent a long time trying to perfect me. And when he worked, he talked about his Great Plan.” Nebula starts once you all gather in the conference room again. 

“Even disassembled, I wanted to please him… I’d ask… Where would we go once his plan was complete? And his answer was always the same…” She walks up to the Holotable. “To the garden.”

“That’s cute.” Rhodey says sarcastically. “Thanos has a retirement plan.”

You roll your eyes but Steve ignores him and asks Nebula, “So, where is he?”

Rocket turns on the Holotable. “When Thanos snapped his fingers, Earth became ground zero for a power surge of ridiculously cosmic proportions.” He explains as the Holotable demonstrates.

“No one’s ever seen anything like it. Until two days ago.” The hologram changes to a different planet. “On this planet.”

“Thanos is there.” Steve states the obvious, as usual.

Natasha leans in closer to the hologram. “He used the stones again.”

“Hey, hey, hey.” Bruce chuckles nervously, interrupting the flow with some valid concerns. “We’d be going in shorthanded, you know?”

“Look, he’s still got the stones, so–” Rhodey supports Bruce but Carol interrupts him.

“So let’s get them.” She says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Use them to bring everyone back.”

“Just like that?” You ask in disbelief, sharing Bruce’s concerns.

“Yeah.” Steve answers now. “Just like that.”

“Even if there’s a small chance that we can undo this…” Natasha speaks up. “I mean, we owe it to everyone who’s not in this room to try.”

“It’s not as simple as that, Tasha.” You scoff. “We kicked all of our asses. Multiple times. And that was when there were twice as many of us than there are now.”

“Look, she’s right. If we do this,” Bruce tries to reason too. “How do we know it’s gonna end any differently than it did before?”

“Because before you didn’t have me.” Everyone turns to Carol.

“Hey, new girl? Everyone in this room is about that superhero life.” Rhodey starts and you roll your eyes while Carol sighs but lets him continue. “And if you don’t mind my asking, where the hell have you been all this time?”

“There are a lot of other planets in the universe.” Carol answers calmly. “And, unfortunately, they didn’t have you guys.”

That shuts Rhodey up real quick while Steve nods in agreement.

That’s when Thor decides to stand and walk up to Carol, who turns to face him unbothered. He holds up his hand and summons Stormbreaker, which flies by, inches from Carol’s face, but she doesn’t even flinch.

Thor looks at her for a moment with an intense gaze that she holds, her eyes narrowing slightly in a way that makes her seem almost amused.

Thor just nods and looks around at the rest of you. “I like her.” Carol almost smirks but doesn’t say anything.

Behind them, Steve stares at the hologram of the planet Thanos is probably in with an intense look. “Let’s go get this son of a bitch.”

[Tuuun tun tun tu-tuun… Okay, I’ll stop.]

You almost snort at Steve cursing and are tempted to make a joke about it, but even you realize it’s not the right time. So you limit yourself to squeezing Steve’s shoulder when you pass him on your way to get ready for the mission.

After you put on your fight suit, you’re securing your weapons to your utility belt when you see a few of Bucky’s knives mixed in with your gear. You hesitate a moment before you pick up his favorite, his ‘lucky’ one, and turn it in your hands.

He considered it lucky because you gave it to him. Or, more accurately, you dropped it while fighting him all the way back in 2014 and he just picked it up and kept it. It reminded Bucky of how far he’s come since then, and it reminded him of you.

You twirl it in your hand a few times, tossing it and catching it and doing a few tricks he taught you before you pocket it, keeping it on your person as a reminder.

A reminder of what you’re fighting for, what you’ll lose all over again if you don’t get the stones back.

There’s a knock on your door and you call out, “It’s open.” without turning around.

“You ready?” Thor comes in and walks up to you in front of the counter.

“Almost. Look, I need you to do me a favor.” You say while you keep securing your gear.

“A favor?” Thor raises an eyebrow.

“If, for some miracle, we actually manage to get a jump on Thanos… I’m gonna need you to keep me away from him.” You don’t even look at him as you say the words, but Thor can see how tense your body is.

He stops you with a gentle hand on your shoulder and simply asks, “Why?”

You turn to look at him now, steady but tense with something that can only be described as fury. “Because if I get my hands on him, I am going to kill him. Stones or no stones.”

Thor doesn’t flinch, doesn’t try to reason, doesn’t try to talk you out of it. He just looks at you and nods, understanding just how much this whole thing has affected you because he’s lost just as much.

No other words are exchanged, you both leave your suite in silence and reunite the others in the hangar where Rocket fixed up the Benetar already.

“Okay.” Rocket starts when once you’re in the ship, everyone secured in as Steve checked twice that nobody would ‘float away’, the Benetar now outside the Earth’s atmosphere. “Who here hasn’t been to space?”

You sigh but you’ve learned to just go along with Rocket so you raise your hand along with Steve, Natasha and Rhodey. Carol chuckles and Thor glances at you amused but you just roll your eyes.

“You better not throw up on my ship.” Rocket adds and you’re pretty sure you’re all questioning your life choices right now.

“Approaching jump in three…” Nebula starts counting down and you brace yourself. “Two, one.”

You almost hold your breath, your nails digging into the arms of the seat as the ship passes the jump point. Colors flash before your eyes so fast it’s like you’re being thrown up by a rainbow and you want to close your eyes but you can’t, the lights too beautiful not to look at.

The ship stops abruptly after the jump point and you groan. “Oh, I hated that so much…” You mumble to Thor who just looks at you in amusement.

Carol gets out of the ship and flies in front of it, saying through her comms, “I’ll head down for recon.” before flying towards the planet.

You all unbuckle and stand up as you wait, readying for Carol’s signal.

“This is a nice ship.” You comment to Rocket as you look around. “I mean… Not that I have a lot of references for alien spaceships.”

“Calm down. To me, you’re the alien.” Rocket says snarkily.

“You’re the talking animal that eats trash though.” You say flatly. “So I think I still win.”

Before he can answer, you turn around when you hear Natasha say to Steve, “This is gonna work, Steve.”

“I know it will.” He answers back with more certainty that you know he probably feels and looks back at her. “‘Cause I don’t know what I’m gonna do if it doesn’t.”

They both turn to you watching them and you just nod in silent agreement and they nod back.

Carol comes back towards the ship and speaks through the comms again. “No satellites. No ships. No armies. No ground defenses of any kind.” She says, which leaves you all confused. “It’s just him.”

“And that’s enough.” Nebula adds, the air tense as you’re all aware of just how powerful Thanos is.

Carol rushes in first, using a photon blast to make a hole on his roof and hit Thanos dead on, then knocks him over and jumps on his back, holding him tightly while pushing his hand with the gauntlet away with her foot.

Then everyone else moves in, Bruce coming from under the house with the Hulkbuster and holding the gauntlet away, then Rhodey flying in and holding his other arm as Thor comes in and cuts his hand with the gauntlet clean off with Stormbreaker.

You walk in then behind Steve and Natasha, standing next to Rocket as he rolls over the gauntlet but your heart drops and you’re all left confused to see no stones on it.

“Oh no…” Rocket mumbles and you just look at Thanos, fury back in your eyes as you take a step closer but Thor puts an arm out, but his body’s just as tense.

“Where are they?” Steve asks Thanos and when he hesitates, Carol tightens her grip on his neck and mumbles, “Answer the question.”

“The universe required correction.” Thanos says through laboured breaths. “After that, the stones served no purpose… beyond temptation.”

“You murdered trillions!” Bruce loses his cool and shoves Thanos back, who falls to the floor but isn’t apologetic.

“You should be grateful.” He insists even as Bruce punches him.

“Where are the stones?” Natasha asks again, her expression intense like she’s trying to hold back tears but also hold onto hope.

“Gone.” Thanos says more firmly. “Reduced to atoms.”

“You used them two days ago!” Bruce points out as you struggle not to hit Thanos yourself, although Thor seems to be losing that battle with himself.

“I used the stones to destroy the stones.” Thanos explains as everyone looks like they want to murder him where he stands. “It nearly killed me. But the work is done… It always will be. I am… Inevitable.”

“We have to tear this place apart.” Rhodey insists frantically. “H-he has to be lying!”

“My father is many things.” Nebula says calmly now, her eyes still on Thanos. “A liar is not one of them.”

She walks closer to Thanos and he looks up at her. “Ah… Thank you, daughter.” He says raspily and she gives a single nod of acknowledgement. 

“Perhaps I treated you too harshly…” The words are barely out of his lips before Thor snaps, wielding Strombraker and cutting Thanos’ head off with a grunt. 

“What??” Bruce breathes out as Nebula touches the blood now on her face.

“What did you do?” Rocket asks as he staggers back.

“I went for the head.” He says simply, still staring at the dead titan as if to make sure he’s not gonna just stand up again. Then he turns away and starts walking out.

You’re looking at him with wide eyes as he passes you and mumbles, “I promised not to let you kill him… I did not promise I wouldn’t do just that.”

Nebula closes her father’s eyes, everyone else in various states of shock.

Even after he’s gone out of the hut, you all take a moment to come to terms with the fact that it’s over. Not only is Thanos dead, but the stones are gone and there’s no way to bring them, or everyone else, back.

What now?

Next Chapter>

You have no time to process anything as the person on the roof starts shooting, narrowly missing you and Natasha as you both move to the front of the car, Nat on Steve’s lap and you on Sam’s. 

Steve pulls the brake handle, and the person gets thrown down onto the street.

“That’s a cool move.” you say while you see the Winter Soldier slide to a stop with his metal hand and then get up.

“Seriously?” Sam glares at you.

You follow him to his car where he manages to open the trunk and get his wings then he puts them on before turning back to you and putting his hands on your waist. “You better hold on.”

You barely have time to put your arms around his neck and he’s taking flight “I don’t like this!” you yell in his ear and can hear him chuckling.

You get closer to them just in time to see a now maskless Winter Soldier aim his gun at Steve, the idiot frozen for some reason. 

“Let go!” you tell Sam and he does, basically throw your on the supersoldier assassin. Not the best plan, but you get him away from Steve. 

When you get up and see the face of the Soldier, your eyes widen in shock as you recognize the soldier from the numerous black and white photos you've seen of the Howling Commandos.

“Sergeant Barnes?” you say, but his face has no recognition of the name. 

He stops for merely a second to glance at Steve behind you before bringing his gun up again, but before he can shoot there’s a sound behind you. You duck instinctively and then a car near the sergeant blows up.

You look behind you and see Natasha with Barnes’ gun leaning on a car, Steve’s face as shocked as you feel. When you turn back around where the soldier was, he’s already gone.

2016

After a minute you hear Steve say “Y/N, he’s coming your way.” and you frown.

“What do you mean he’s-” Before you can answer you can see Bucky jumping out a balcony and you let out a quiet “Holy shit.” that makes Steve groan and Sam snicker.

Bucky lands not too far away from you and, before he can get to his backpack, you put yourself in front of him so he can’t get to it.

“Hello, soldier.” you say in a teasing and vaguely flirting tone, but he simply looks at you for half a second before throwing a punch that you avoid and quickly say “Not a talker. Got it.” Before throwing a punch of your own that he easily stops, holding your arm as he sweeps your legs and in a second you’re on the ground.

She says defensively, then pushes a button that stops the restriction on the audio from Bucky’s cell and allows us to hear it on the little screen in the corner.

“I'm not here to judge you. I just want to ask you a few questions.” you can hear the psychiatrist say. “Do you know where you are, James? I can't help you if you don't talk to me, James.”

“My name is Bucky.” Bucky says calmly. 

It’s the first time you hear him speak clearly and your eyes are glued to the screen. His voice is deep and gruff and you can’t help but find it attractive. You take a moment to really look at him and you think to yourself, for a brainwashed psycho assassin that’s almost 100 years old, he’s really quite handsome, isn’t he?

Suddenly there's movement behind you and you quickly turn around just in time to avoid Sam getting thrown into you and he lands against the pod instead. 

You barely have time to react when you feel a punch in the stomach and stagger backwards against the wall, knocking the air out of you. You slide down on it and take a second to compose yourself as Steve starts fighting Bucky.

You run outside, where you see Sam just standing there in the middle of the running crowd. You go to him and, when he notices you, he shows you a hoodie that you assume to be the psychiatrist’s.

“I lost the doctor.” He confirms your theory.

“I lost the soldier.” You tell him and he sighs, as you both look around.

You completely enter the room, standing next to Sam but your eyes don’t leave Bucky, rightfully wary of the man.

“Don’t worry, he’s back to himself.” Steve says when he notices your careful and calculated moves.

“I am worried. He also tried to kill me as himself.” You say, looking away from Bucky and to the two men next to you.

“I wasn’t trying to kill you, I was trying not to get captured by you.” Bucky addresses you directly for the first time ever with an accusatory tone.

“Semantics.” You answer, looking back at him and narrowing your eyes. Your defiant, but admittedly childish, answer seems to surprise Bucky but it gets a chuckle out of Sam and a groan out of Steve.

“Just… please.” Steve says to you, almost begging you. “Help him.”

You roll your eyes and groan, mumbling an annoyed “Fine.” while cautiously moving towards Bucky. As you kneel in front of him and open the first aid kit you can hear Steve and Sam talking, but pay them no mind.

“You know I’m a supersoldier, right?” Bucky asks you quietly.

“Supersoldiers can bleed too.” you say while looking down and not at him, looking through the stuff in the kit. “The image of an unconscious and beaten up Steve in a hospital bed comes to mind.”

He knows you’re talking about Steve’s conditions after the whole Project Insight situation in DC, and you can tell he feels bad about it as he instantly looks away from you.

“Sorry,” you say with a sigh “That was mean.”

He seems to perk up a little at your apology and looks back at you.

“It’s okay.” You look up at him. “I kind of deserved it.”

You smile a little at this, and start to take out the stuff you’ll need as you say “You kind of did.”

You go to clean his cut but wince slightly, you almost forgot about your injuries. You take a deep breath and start carefully cleaning his cut and the blood off his forehead.

“Did I hurt you?” He asks you quietly, seemingly concerned that you’re in pain.

“Don’t worry.” You tell him just as quietly. “It’s nothing I can’t handle, Sergeant.”

“I bet you can, doll.” You almost feel like you imagined the nickname, but you’re positive you saw a grin on his face for half a second.

You can feel his eyes glued to your face as you take care of his cut, silently watching you work. You almost feel like he’s memorizing every detail of your face, like he’s trying to figure out everything about you right in that instance. 

When you’re done you take a second to look into his eyes, expecting him to look away, but he holds your gaze and you feel your heart skip a beat by the intensity of his stare. After a moment you slowly get up, your eyes still locked on his as you take a step back. 

Your joy about seeing your gear is a little overshadowed by Bucky’s voice as he talks to Sam.

“Can you move your seat up?” He asks, surprisingly polite.

“No.” Is all Sam says, being the petty bitch that he is. You roll your eyes at him, you get that the last time a car was involved with Bucky in the mix it didn’t go great, but still.

“Here, switch with me.” You tell Bucky and pull him to the middle seat, then climb over him to slide into his seat, being sure to smack Sam in the back of his head as you go and smirking at the loud “Ow” he lets out. You look back at Bucky and see him blushing slightly and you can’t help but smile.

Steve gets closer to the van, followed by Sam while you stay behind with Bucky, both of you leaning on the car as you stand on the passenger’s side to be able to see over the car because you’re just that short. 

You hear a little snicker from Bucky and look at him with your eyes narrowed as he seems amused by the sight but doesn’t say anything. Your attention goes back to the van as Clint loudly opens the side door.

You can see Bucky throwing a punch but Spiderman catches his fist easily, shocking all three of us while shouting “You have a metal arm?! That is awesome, dude!”

Sam goes flying into Spiderman and takes him away, while you approach Bucky.

“Did that sound like a kid to you?” you ask him, still looking after Sam and Spiderman.

“Doesn’t matter. Let’s go.” He says starting to go after the other two.

“Matters a little…” You mumble while following Bucky.

After a beat of silence Bucky says “You couldn’t have done that earlier?” to which Sam answers “I hate you.” and you roll your eyes and say “God, you two are children.”

You and Clint exchange a look but you get distracted by T’Challa throwing Bucky into a container near you. You get into action right away and just as T’Challa is about to claw at Bucky, you push the supersoldier out of the way and you both go stumbling to the side while Wanda throws T’Challa into a big metal container far away from you. 

You and Bucky roll a little and, when you stop, you end on top of him. He looks up at you and whispers “Thank you.”

“Anytime, Soldier.” You wink at him and get up, helping him up too. Wanda joins you with an amused look on her face.

“I got this. Go.” You tell the two men even though your eyes are fixated on Bucky. 

“Are you sure?” he asks you with a hint of worry and you grin.

“It’s nothing I can’t handle, Sergeant.” Steve smirks and nods, moving towards the jet again, but Bucky hesitates. You know Wanda won’t be able to keep the path clear forever so you try to reassure him. 

“Go, I’ll be fine. Go!” You yell the last word, which seems to snap him out of it and he turns around with a nod, running at full speed towards the Quinjet.

After the tour Bucky approaches you in the living room and only then you notice he’s missing his metal arm.

“You flew the jet with only one arm? That’s impressive…” You can’t help yourself as you reach to touch his left shoulder, your eyes fixated on it. But stop on your tracks when you feel his right hand carefully cupping your cheek.

Your eyes snap up to his and you can see him thoroughly inspecting the wounds in your face that are still healing a little. He grimaces when he looks down at your bandaged arm and whispers “I’m sorry…”

“It’s nothing I can’t handle, Sergeant.” You smile softly at him and put your hand over his still on your cheek, trying to reassure him that you’re fine.

“I bet you can, doll.” He chuckles.

You’re too busy staring at each other to notice everyone’s attention is on you until Steve clears his throat with an apologetic look on his face.

“We need to go, Buck.” He says and you look confusedly between the two men.

“I’m going back into cryo.” Bucky clarifies for you.

“Oh.” Is all you can say and your eyes widen for a second before you force yourself to put on a more neutral face.

“It’s okay.” He smiles at you, but you feel like he’s trying to convince himself as much as you. “It’s nothing I can’t handle, doll.”

You try your best to smile and not look too bummed out. “I bet you can, Sergeant.”

You hesitate for a moment before surprising him, the others and even yourself by giving him a hug. He hesitates too before delicately hugging you back and, after a moment, you pull away. 

He smiles at you with a faint blush and you smile back, watching him walk to the door.

2018

“Sergeant Barnes.” Shuri says with a smile.

“Bucky.” he corrects her and you smile from a distance.

“How are you feeling today?” she asks him.

“Good. Thank you.” she smiles and motions towards you.

“Come. Much more for you to learn.” she says as she starts walking.

He takes a second to look out at the lake before following Shuri, but as soon as he spots you, he stops.

He stares as you’re giggling with the children that are now circling around you and dancing, and when you look towards Bucky again his eyes are already on you.

You blush a little at his intense gaze but he seems to snap out of it when your eyes meet his and he gets closer until he’s right in front of you.

“Sergeant.” you say, smirking.

“Doll.” he says, smirking back.

You smile at each other until Shuri clears her throat and you turn to look at her just to see both her and Ayo with a smirk of their own. You roll your eyes at them, but your smile stays on.

“Shall we?” Shuri says and starts walking, Ayo right behind her.

Bucky takes your hand and starts walking after Shuri too, pulling you with him, both of you feeling like nothing could wipe the smiles off your faces.

Three weeks earlier

You wake up in Bucky’s hut around 1am, but he’s not in it. You already know why so you just get up and make your way outside to look for him. You find him at the edge of the water, just staring at the moon reflecting on the surface.

“I’m sorry, doll.” He mumbles before you even sit down next to him. “I didn’t mean to wake you. Go back to bed.”

“You didn’t wake me up.” You reassure him while sitting down next to him, your head immediately going on his shoulder. “I just can’t sleep without you.”

He can see how sleepy you are and he wraps his good arm around you, kissing your head. “You should go back to bed, sweetheart.” “Not without you.” You mumble sleepily but that just makes him smile. He adores how stubborn you are, refusing to leave him alone when you know he’s hurting, no matter how tired you are.

“Fine.” He sighs, pretending to be annoyed but not quite hiding his grin. “Let’s go.”

He helps you to your feet and grabs your hand, your fingers intertwining as leads the way back inside the hut.

Once you’re in bed, Bucky wraps his arm around you again while you rest your head on his chest, already half in dreamland.

He just looks at you for the longest time, this woman that’s seen him at his worst, that stuck by him through his recovery, that never lets him feel alone and loves him despite everything.

Not that you’ve said it, neither of you have. Him because he feels he doesn’t deserve to love you or be loved by you, you because you don’t want to overwhelm him.

But he knows.

He feels it in the way you silently take care of him, silently get him what he needs before he even asks, whether it be a glass of water, a hand with his hair or all the support he doesn’t think he deserves but desperately needs, because you know he would never ask even if he knows you’d give him the world if he did ask. 

He knows your love not because you say it, but  because you show it.

And right there and then, in the dark of his hut while he thinks you’re fully asleep and can’t hear, he makes a promise to himself, to you, to the stars.

“I’m going to marry you someday.” He mumbles, his lips on your hair, his eyes closing as he attempts to go back to sleep.

And he doesn’t catch the way your heart flutters.

Two weeks earlier

You finish suiting up before you approach him, gently stopping his hands from putting grenades in his utility belt and taking his hands in yours, moving your one up the Vibranium just to get the feel of it.

Bucky’s eyes follow your hand, a small frown on his face. “It feels weird…” He mumbles.

“What do you mean?” You ask quietly.

“It feels…” He pauses with that concentrated look on his face that you’ve come to learn means he’s trying really hard to process what he’s feeling and find a way to explain them that will make sense. “It feels. Like… I can feel your hand, your fingers moving… I can feel you.”

You smile up at him and move both your hands up his arms to wrap yours around his neck. “Now you can feel me more.” You say playfully as he wraps his arms around your waist, managing to get a small smile out of him but it’s short lived. 

You can see the moment it dawns on him that there’s another fight, another war coming, and you can hear it without him even needing to say it, the violence is never gonna stop.

“Buck…” You say quietly and cup his face. “It’s one fight… This is it, this is… This is everything.” You whisper while stroking his cheeks. “This is for the whole universe… After this, we’re done. You’re done.” 

“I’m never gonna be done.” Bucky sighs, resting his forehead against yours.

“You are. I promise you, I will make sure that you are.” You say firmly, and he can see that you truly believe in your words. You’re gonna try everything you can to go through with your promise.

He leans in and kisses you, not a ‘goodbye’ kind of kiss, but an ‘I know how stubborn you can be and I believe you’ kind of kiss. And he really does.

“How we looking?” Natasha asks, all business.

“You will have my King’s Guard, the Border Tribes, the Dora Milaje and…” He points to the side.

“A semi-stable 100-year-old man and the prettiest assassin to ever exist.” Bucky says as he walks up to them with you at his side and hugs Steve.

“Someone has quite a high opinion of himself.” You tease him while hugging Natasha.

“I was talking about you, Doll.” Bucky smirks.

“I am not a 100-year-old man, Barnes.” You smirk back.

“It is like this all the time.” Okoye rolls her eyes and you shoot her a look while Steve chuckles. 

“How you guys been?” Steve asks with a smile.

“Uh, not bad…” Bucky answers while wrapping an arm around your shoulders with an almost proud smile.

“... For the end of the world.” You add with an equal smile as you lean against Bucky. 

The drop ships crash onto the defense field around Wakanda and explode, at which Bucky says quietly, “God, I love this place.”

You feel him take your hand and intertwine your fingers together but when you glance at him he’s still looking up so you just squeeze his hand gently, a smile on your face until you spot Sam smirking and you roll your eyes as you both look back up.

“Dumbass…” You mumble, which gets Bucky to lightly elbow your side and you glare at him, but he just smirks.

“Then we better keep ‘em in front of us.” Steve says simply.

“How do we do that?” Okoye looks at T’Challa too.

“Oh, no…” You mumble while tightening the grip on one of your guns as you take Bucky’s hand one last time, already knowing where this is going and not liking it one bit.

Steve readies his shield as T’Challa shouts an order for the soldiers to drop their shields. T’Challa steps forward and you squeeze Bucky’s hand, he squeezes back before you both let go and grip your weapons, getting ready for the inevitable fight about to take place.

“Bring. Me. Thanos!” Thor shouts before he charges with Groot and Rocket following.

“That’s a little dramatic.” You mumble as he leaps above the Outriders while summoning lightning. Bucky nods slightly with a small smirk as you two join the fight again.

“Get down!” He tells you and you do with no hesitation while Bucky picks up Rocket and spins with him, the both of them shooting all around.

“How much for the gun?” Rocket asks after Bucky sets him down and you raise an eyebrow at the raccoon while trying not to laugh.

“Not for sale.” Bucky deadpans.

“Okay… How much for the arm?” Rocket asks and you can’t help the little snort that escapes you as Bucky looks at Rocket incredulously before just walking away without answering.

“Did a talking raccoon just ask to buy your arm?” You can’t help but tease as you follow Bucky.

“Shut up…” He grumbles back and you can hear Rocket snicker and mutter, “Oh, I’ll get that arm…”, making you snort again as Bucky glares at you.

“Is Steve talking to a tree?” You frown at Bucky as you see them from the distance while shooting aliens. “What the hell is happening??”

“Hell if I know.” Bucky shakes his head.

You hear Natasha mumble, ”What the hell…” as you step closer to Bucky unconsciously while gripping your guns tighter out of nerves, as if you’re expecting Thanos to suddenly appear out of thin air.

Just when everyone starts regaining consciousness, the Mind Stone cracks and breaks, sending a wave of energy through the forest and you can vaguely feel Bucky’s arms wrapping around you just before the explosion hits everyone and sweeps you all away.

Steve, finally having managed to get his ground as everyone else slowly stands up, goes up to Thor, panting and clutching his side while you and Bucky follow behind with Bucky helping you up.

“Where’d he go?” Steve looks around. “Thor?”

Thor doesn’t answer, just looks up at him and Steve repeats, “Where’d he go?”

“Steve?” Steve’s eyes snap to Bucky, yours already on him when he suddenly stops holding your weight. 

He’s slowly disappearing and barely has time to look at you and start saying, “Doll-” before he falls to his knees.

Or rather, he would’ve if he hadn’t turned to ash completely right before hitting the ground. You, on the other hand, do fall to your knees right in front of where the ashes of your boyfriend are slowly settling. “Bucky…” 

You barely register Steve kneeling next to you, tears blurring your vision as he touches the ground, almost as if expecting Bucky to suddenly be there again. But he’s not. And all around you, others start turning to ash too.

You can faintly hear Rhodey shouting, nobody quite fully understanding what’s happening yet, but all you can do is stare at the spot where Bucky’s body would be.

Should be. He’s gone…

We lost.

All those moments filled your mind like a personal attack on your sanity, his voice ringing so loud it pierced through your very soul.

And then you broke.

You fell to your knees, letting out a scream that brought Steve and Natasha running, their hearts breaking when they saw you breaking down.

Steve wrapped his arms around you and all you could do was let him, your helpless screams and sobs filling the air.

Present

You set down the mask on your night stand and wander into the hallway just in time to see Steve looking just as curious as you as to what is making the walls shake.

A bright light shines through the hallway floor-to-ceiling windows and you see Captain Marvel carrying a spaceship. You share a look with Steve before you both run out to the yard.

Outside the Benatar, the Guardians of the Galaxy’s ship, comes into view from behind the Compound as you, Steve, Natasha, Bruce, Rhodey and Rocket reach Pepper in the middle of the yard, everyone looking up at the sky as Captain Marvel lowers the ship onto the grass.

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