#rkdec17eval

she liked keeping busy, she liked watching people come together in time for the holiday season; actually was enthralled with the late nights and the small conversations she’s held with everyone at their most vulnerable moments. where exhaustion exists and formalities are dropped because of it. then again, also knowing it was a possibility it would be her last evaluation as a trainee seemed to sweeten the deal : made her work harder, want to spend a little bit more time with those she knew she’ll miss in the new year.

the day goes by and night soon falls; seven pm sharp do metaphorical curtains rise and everyone is in position. the first stage begins and it’s the song that has jihyun rushing from where she stood among the other trainees, pushing past others to sneak a peek from the wings. watching with warm hearts and a proud smile as jongin and minyoung sang on stage. their voices mingling together in a way jihyun could only remember so fondly. days of their time in new york coming back to her as they sang, tales of obnoxious karaoke and sleepy carols had nothing on what the two were performing on stage.

it all comes back to her and as warm as it makes her feel, revisiting fond memories; she’s sad she can’t join them -- retreats before they can see her. her regrets left on the back burner as she’s back to reciting the lyrics of her own performances. when it ends, she spots them in the crowd so easily ; a hand rising in acknowledgement as she waves to them from where she stands in the crowd, amidst the rest of the trainees going here and there, to and from the stage -- trying to keep their nerves under wraps as the concert continued. because at the end of the day, it was still an evaluation and as much as she wanted to wrap her friends in her arms and congratulate them on how well they sounded -- it was best to leave such wishes for the end.

they all still had a show to put on. and jihyun knew better than anyone that putting a half-assed performance for the crowd would be her own undoing. so, she does as she’s told ; instructed by staff to stand where they need her to. waits for her turn to enter the stage, microphone attached to the silk of her cheek by clear tape.

one breath, two -- eyes face the wall behind them, backs to the crowd. the voices from behind already buzzing in her ears before the music begins. the excitement that sinks into her veins, energizing her -- reinventing the thoughts that had clouded her in misery earlier. the smile she dons when she turns, choreography mended into her very bones, becomes more genuine as the song continues -- to the very last bow, it brings the festive holiday spirit back into her eyes.

it continues throughout the concert; ( a sensation that jihyun thanks when it all ends ) from one performance to another. as be my baby comes, she’s rather thrilled for the performance. and unlike her performances at royal survival, save for a few, she feels a liveliness in her -- one she can say isn’t specified as competitiveness or desperation. this one keeps her happy, smile growing wider as she dances around the stage; each movement made to mirror another trainees from beside her. it lacks the christmas-time spirit, unfortunately, but they make it work.

jihyun was sure she could supply enough christmas spirit for the performance if they needed it.

We used to be best buddies And now we're not I wish you would tell me why

christmas has always been something weird for dongmin. before his grandmother became an angel, he use to spend the day with her and his mother. his father always off on a business trip somewhere. and for a few years he would take his mother with him. leaving just dongmin and his grandmother to fill the day with as much joy as they could. usually consisting with making cookies, and watching old movies. his grandmother was always so warm, and the days spent with her had been the most meaningful. 

It gets a little lonely All these empty rooms (These empty rooms) Just watching the hours tick by (Tic-Tock, Tic-Tock, Tic-Tock, Tic-Tock)

when he lost his grandmother, christmas was a lonely day. his parents weren’t home and his grandmother wasn’t around. he would spend the day to himself. usually filling it with homework, and eating as many sweets as he could. it bothered him at first, but he grew use to it, and christmas just became another day to him. he would leave small gifts for his parents under the tree, and they would transfer money into his bank account. it was all just business.

Don’t have to be a snowman

christmas this year was special. 

being apart of royal has changed so much about his life. and for once he isn’t going to be spending christmas alone. his mother and him already had a small celebration themselves since he was going to be busy with trainee stuff the day of, and he had heard she was going to her sisters for the day. something he was surprised to hear because he knew she hadn’t been around them in ages. thats why he had never gotten to meet chaeyoung.

thoughts of his family, seokmin and chaeyoung, his friends, his new family. of kibum, and jaehyun hyung. baekhyun hyung, and rachel noona, minah noona and joshua hyung. the royal trainees, and the trainees he has met in other companies. filled his head as he sang. and he poured those emotions into his singing. 

his high notes were coming up, the part he was most nervous about. but when everyone else started singing. he felt renewed with energy. 

Elsa Please, I know you're in there (I know you’re in there) People are asking where you've been (Oh ho~) They say "have courage", and I'm trying to (Trying to) I’m right out here for you (Right here for you) Just let me in (Just let me in)

We only have each other (We only have each other) It’s just you and me What are we gonna do? (What are we gonna do)

with his friends beside him, he knows he can accomplish anything. he wasn’t sure about his path as a singer, and he didn’t know what he would do in the future. or where the future was even going to take him. but he knows what he wants. he wants this. this stage, and every other stage he can possible be apart of. 

this is what he wants. this is where he wants to be. and he is going to do everything he could possibly do to stay here. no matter how many hours he has too practice. or how tired he gets.

Okay, bye

I simply must go So thanks for the show The welcome has been So nice and warm

it was one of dawon’s all-time favorite christmas songs, meaning that she felt considerably lucky to have been chosen to perform it. the fact that she was performing it with as talented of a vocalist as baekhyun made her feel all the more lucky, as, in that moment, she felt that she couldn’t have picked anyone that she’d rather sing a song with. he had a beautiful voice, one that dawon enjoyed listening to; and, in her honest opinion, she thought that the two of them sounded pleasant together.

There's bound to be talk tomorrow At least there will be plenty implied

she was unable to ignore the feeling of déjà vu, remembering just how much joy she had felt during last year’s holiday celebrations. she had felt on top of the world, and, honestly, she had expected most everything in her life to stay the same. events from earlier in the year proved that it was impossible for things to completely stay the same, however. would this time be different? would she actually manage to maintain her happiness into the new year, or would yet another drastic and unpleasant change present itself?

I really can't stay Baby, it's cold Baby, it's cold outside

COUPLES START PERFORMANCE: Baby It’s Cold Outside Performed by: Ahn Sohee & Yoo Youngjae + Hwang Miyoung & Kim Jongdae + Jung Soojung & Nam Woohyun + Lee Minyoung & Kim Jongin + Nam Dawon & Byun Baekhyun 

SPHERE BOYS: Show Me Your Love

KT GIRLS: Party

NOVA BOYS: Lately 

ROYAL GIRLS: To My Boyfriend

TRC BOYS: Mistletoe

BOYS SPECIAL STAGE: Jingle Bells+Feliz Navidad Performed by: Ha Huidong + Im Jaebum + Jung Jaehyun + Kim Kibum + Kwak Youngmin + Lee Taemin + Nakamoto Yuta + Oh Jinseok + Yoo Changhyun + Zhang Yixing

SPHERE GIRLS: Merry Christmas In Advance

KT BOYS: Wish Tree

NOVA GIRLS: Santa Tell Me 

ROYAL BOYS: Let It Snow

TRC GIRLS: Santa Baby

GIRLS SPECIAL STAGE: Santa’s Coming For Us Performed by: Choi Jinri + Jung Sooyeon + Kim Taeyeon + Lee Jihyun + Son Seungwan

SPHERE BOYS: White

KT GIRLS: I Love You

NOVA BOYS: Santa Claus Is Coming To Town

ROYAL GIRLS: Be My Baby

TRC BOYS: Last Christmas

KTROOKIES SPECIAL STAGE: Holiday Medley Performed by: Kim Taeyeon, Hwang Miyoung, Lee Taemin, Kwak Youngmin, Lee Hyeri, Kim Yerim, Kim Jongdae, Park Jimin, Park Sunyoung, Choi Sooyoung

SPHERE GIRLS: Yayaya

KT BOYS: Santa U Are The One

NOVA GIRLS: Happy Christmas

ROYAL BOYS: This Christmas

TRC GIRLS: All I Want For Christmas Is You 

luckily for him, their performance that they’ve worked so hard on is right up his alley. it begins with cheesy smiles, toothy grins that might seem a little too sweet, sweeter than hot chocolate -- taeyong is all smiles, a little pout coming up on his lips when the lyrics morph and change. from yien to rome, from woohyun to jinki, taeyong makes sure that he isn’t lost within the group, that he’s getting his time in when it’s time for him.

his part comes on -- he still really can’t believe he’s in the vocal team for his group. but it’s a nice change of pace -- a nice indication of his shift in focus on his training. he sings his little heart out, warm smiles all around. he shakes his head, full of aegyo, his eyes wide and his bottom lip still jutted out.

the choreography while harmonizing is somewhat difficult -- but the adrenaline of performing drives him forward, makes him the confident person that he appears to be in front of the crowd. in little breaks where the other members are singing their parts, he looks towards the crowd, looks toward yuta on the side of the stage and smiles -- winks.

as the performance rolls on, as they continue to dance with each other, smile at each other, laugh at each other -- taeyong notes how this feels to him. how this group of people make him feel. he looks to yixing -- a fitting leader, his strong presence still coming through the cutesy choreography. then to the rest of the vocal team -- hyun being the charismatic king that he is, kibum making his heart warm with every facial expression, woohyun and jinki letting their honey vocals speaking for themselves. then to ten, who he hopes is having the best time in the world -- because he deserves it. they all deserve.

he couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to be grouped together with -- he couldn’t imagine it being with any others.

soon, it ends -- the adrenaline keeps pumping through his bloodstream, though, as they all step off to make way for the kt girls, who’s sure to follow it up with even more holiday cheer. he feels ten’s hand clutch at his forearm, and he smiles at him before he looks towards his boyfriend with a soft gaze -- did i do good, he hopes his expression reads as such.

It’s always fun performing with Kaeun unni, Hyuna unni, and Min sunbaenim. This also marks the first performance with Suji unni. Wendy may have been more of a “loop The Nutcracker Suite in lieu of Christmas carols” type of girl, but she had developed a soft spot for the first song she’s performing for the night. Ariana Grande’s “Santa Tell Me” is relatable, in a way that she hopes that a person she’d have a crush on would still be around next year. She can’t get anyone to stay, case and point: Toshi and Minhyun oppa. (To be fair, Minhyun oppa did shoot her down on Day 1, but he was always there as an older brother slash handsome friend to her). 

There’s also the unspoken pressure that she has to do well to represent Nova in the joint collaboration with the girls from other companies. It’s an honor to share the stage with three MGA season three coaches from different companies. Rumor had it that the girls she was performing with were the among the best trainee vocalists in their respective companies. She had heard three of them sing back at the MGAs, and she had even shared a stage with Taeyeon sunbaenim. However, it still doesn’t stop her from being impressed whenever she hears them sing in practice, and every day she wonders what she did in her past life to be worthy of standing and singing on the same stage with some respected senior trainees. 

There seems to be an unspoken agreement among the females of Nova that they would all rather die than do aegyo. However, when push came to shove and their backs were against the wall, there was a surprising reveal of aegyo skills. Min sunbaenim was a revelation of sorts to Wendy, that she found herself taking notes on how to pull it off as naturally as Min sunbaenim did. If she respected Min sunbaenim before, then Wendy’s respect grew even more. It takes talent to pull off aegyo and be cute without being cringe-worthy. Wendy hopes and prays that her cutesy acting and smiling onstage didn’t come across as laughable. It took her hours to practice e expressions in front of the mirror between study breaks. 

Finally, there was the final stage. It’s been long since she got to share a stage with Yeri, one of her long-time best friends. She also recognizes the two boys: one of them is the one with Soojung a lot while the other was one of those attractive faces she accepted a Royal flyer from. During practice, they realized that they who got solo lines were the youngest trainees of their respective companies. Wendy almost wants to laugh at the irony of it all, yet it also makes sense.  The program ends with a Disney song... and that they youngest kids lead it. As much Wendy has professed to banning anyone within her vicinity from singing this song when the movie first came out, it has grown on her. Oh... if her other friends could see her now. (She bets Seulgi and Joy are giggling somewhere as they remember her screams of agony when she got sick of the song). They’d probably be laughing at her for singing the song she once loathed.