#rastim

And.

A seventeen-year-old boy who has not slept in three days since the last time someone drugged him, has not showered in three weeks unless you count being thrown into a river, has not cleaned his room since he was three and his parents still payed attention to him.

Technically, this is not Tim's problem.

Tim did not send the ninjas to steal some magic artifact that heals anything it touches. Tim neither decided Batman et al had to intervene. And Tim certainly didn't tell Batman and Ra's fucking al Ghul to start some duel.

It is not his problem, until Damian and Jason hit a few ninjas too hard.

"Hey!" Tim yells, feeling still hungover from yesterday's drinks with Tam and silly after a Sex and The City marathon; "Can you guys tone it down?"

"Are you kidding? They are stealing a magic statue, babybird!" Jason argues, shooting at some poor ninja that, thankfully, seems to only get a bruise, the bullet missing by a few inches. "Tell B to fucking wrap it and kick that old man!"

"Grandfather is not easy to defeat," Damian mentions, "His followers will not surrender."

Another ninja gets knocked out by Dick, all while Ra's performs his evil "look at me I am a villain from Bond" laugh at Bruce. Tim, running on five hours of sleep, a donut and diet coke, snaps.

"Enough!" He yells as he dances his way between bullets and hits towards Ra's; in a blink, he pulls the immortal to him, and hisses.

Ra's raises an eyebrow. Intrigued.

"The ninjas are hurt. They need medical attention," Tim complains, perhaps too loudly, but it gets the attention of the bats; "And, to be honest, they are getting their ass kicked. Their moral will be down for weeks, so I'd suggest therapy."

"Now, we agreed to not discuss that here," Ra's murmurs, giving a quick glance to a gasping Bruce, "They will be fine, beloved."

"No. You take them to a doctor now, Ra's," Tim lets him go, crossing his arms, doing the best imitation he can do on his mother, "They are mine too, are they not? I want them to see a doctor and rest."

"... My fault for signing a prenup, I suppose," Ra's sighs and, after putting the statue in the ground, kicks it towards the Batman. "If it pleases you, then I will take them to a doctor."

"Good."

"That, however, does not mean I will not come back for this artifect. Mother Nature needs it."

"Please, just hire Poison Ivy already," Tim waves his hand in the air, too tired to deal with the bats shocked faces ans gasping mouths, "See you next week?"

"At Paris. Our usual restaurant."

"Perfect. Bye."

Tim kisses Ra's, quick and a bit silly, and then goes to pick up a wounded Bruce while the ninjas sneak away with their master.

shortly after becoming nightwing, dick keeps running into deathstroke every few months. he tries to stop him from doing his jobs, mostly just postponing the inevitable. shamefully, dick starts to enjoy the chase and rough tumbling with someone whose skills match his own (or even surpass them). they flirt while they spar and eventually dick decides that a better way to distract slade is to let him fuck him. it earns dick more time to secure slade's targets and resolves their fights without anything broken on dick's part.

red hood and black mask constantly ruin each other's operations and attempt to kill each other. jason despises roman for being involved in stuff like human trafficking while roman thinks jason is too soft. finally, it culminates in them fucking in some abandoned warehouse. but it doesn't end there. the sex is dangerous, it often involves guns or knives and jason never knows if roman won't suddenly use this opportunity to permanently get rid of him. of course, jason uses his connection to roman to gather information. he plants bugs in his office while they fuck, he flirts with him to make roman at ease and brag about his plans, and he snoops through his apartment when roman gets called away because of an emergency. ultimately, red hood takes over the gotham criminal underworld and black mask barely escapes with his life.

there's some world ending threat and the only person to know how to stop it is ra's al ghul. all of tim's friends and family are in danger and nothing seems to be working, so he goes to make a deal with ra's. tim assumes ra's will ask him for some morally reprehensible favor to test his conviction and he knows he won't be able to agree to it. so instead he offers his body. ra's can do whatever he wants with him in exchange for helping save the world. and if the next time they need the league's help with something, tim proposes the same terms? well, it's not like he has any better ideas.

the robins enjoy it to some degree. they don't ever say "no" (would their partners even respect it if they wanted to stop?). but is it truly what they want? or are they just doing it because it seems like the easiest option?