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You were an orphan raised on the streets of the great megatropolises covering Earth. You escaped the life of petty crime and underworld gangs by enlisting with the Alliance military when you turned eighteen.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I have heard some mutuals say they wish they could play it again for the first time, and you kind of can--through me! Iâve been posting little âepisodesâ of live-tweet-stream-of-consciousness as I play, and now Iâve compiled them into one post to make my life easier.
Anyway, hereâs the first one, the rest are under the cut. :)
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode one
My ass looks great in this uniform, first of all
Impaled robo zombies, yikes
Cheap shot, Saren, smh. How will I pass my spectre test now?!
Why does he have robot eyes? Is he like, Geth-Turian? Why? Is he a robo zombie also? Was it the beacon???
Cool beacon nightmares, I'm sure this is fine
This Kaiden guy has implants? ORTEGA?!??!?
"Call me princess again and you'll be picking your teeth up off the floor" lol obliterated
The citadel elevators are very realistic, five minutes of tense silence huh
Ya girl got a PROMOTION and a DOPE SQUAD time to catch a TRAITOR
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode two
First things first, gotta go find the blue scientist to join the gang
This galaxy is HUGE! How many of these places will I actually be able to go?!
Only two friends at a time????? D:
Ah, a distress signal, let's see wha--A DESERT CENTIPEDE NOPE ABORT ABORT
Robo aliens? In MY Theronian mining facility? Its more likely than you think
Running over dudes in my Mako is extremely satisfying tbh
*runs over geth troopers* *runs over geth armature* *runs over geth colossus* ... *backs over geth colossus*
Working elevators in the ancient ruins â
Oooooooh man hope this nerd is gay
Wrex, a friend of yours? Nope, not a friend, too murdery
"ShAaaAame about the ruins Shep, sOooOo much collatoral damage, SHEP" stfu Council, "ruthless" was in the resume when you promoted us, 10/10 would shoot lasers through archeological digs again
When Kaiden calls us "ma'am" I am, uh, into it
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode three
Time to talk to the gang! Gotta meet the fam proper
Oh dear seems we got a shmee of racism on board, compatriots
Wow Raina, good foot-in-mouth moment with Wrex there huh...sorry about the eventual extinction of your race, lost this round of Pain Olympics
OH SHIT OH SHIT BLUE HOTTIE BIGENDER? THIS IS NOT A DRILL???
âhi Iâm Kaiden wanna hear about my last crush ;)â âhi Iâm Liara wanna hear about Asari mating rituals? ;)))â damn we really slidin right into the DMs no chill
Garrus: fuck rules and red tape amiright Raina: oh u right ;)
Guess Iâll actually do a mission now LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO
Honestly rolling out with Tali and Liara is a mood, squad goals
Raina @ every corporation on Noveria: I would sell you to satan for one(1) corn chip
This reactivation puzzle is some shit
I see some Mistakes were made
We already killing moms at this stage damn BioWare
FUCK FUCK BENEZIA KILLED ME AND I LOST A FUCKTON OF PLAYTIME
THERES LIKE NO AUTOSAVE IN THIS BITCH FUUUUUUUUU
fuck fuck fuck god damn it gotta shoot a bunch of deranged baby bug people again god DAMN IT
Okay we killed Liaraâs mom in front of her hope thatâs fine
And we let mama bug go free because after talking to Wrex, Rainaâs like âthis galaxy is a little trigger happy with the genocide, good luck out there bug mama â¤ď¸ be cool pleaseâ
I have literally watched the scientist in the hot labs get killed three times now
So far the debreifs with the council have not gone very well
âYou let bug mama go?! How many generations until they take over everything???â âMy moneyâs on two :D Place your bets now assholes or stfu :DDDâ
Asked Liara if she was okay and she seems pretty Cool With It
I hope to one day return to Noveria and Death Star it into oblivion
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode four
Talked with Tali and this situation with the Geth and the Quarians is giving me an existential crisis
You âinspectâ my beautiful ship? You got somethinâ to say about my crew??? Talk shit get hit, bitch I will kill you
Yoooo my old earth gang, yeah what the hell, Iâll help ouâoh nope nvm heâs a xenophobe, you hang him and Iâll shoot his friend in the face, thx for your time
Went to the citadel to finish some assignments, left tasked with twice as many
âdOnâT cUt CoRneRsâ fear not dear Kaiden, I have a permit: this piece of paper that says I do what I want
Still with the elevators, I really cannot with this
âYou make it all sound so...dangerous...â ;) ;))))))
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode five
Headinâ to Virmire to rendezvous with the Salarian team
A cure for the genophase?!?!?! :D
Oh wait oh no are we for real gonna talk about destroying the cure like Wrex isnât standing right here omg
SHIT GUYS NO NOT LIKE THIS WREX PLEASE
Phew for a conversation that basically started with guns drawn, it went pretty well... âWhat Saren has isnât even a proper cure, heâs just fucking with the Krogans at this point. Are we gonna stand for that? Or are we gonna murder?â âDamn Shep, you right, we gonâ murderâ
Okay Ashley, go join the aliens, try not to die
Shadow Team!đľ tearing through the base đś disabling all the   defenses đľ (you gotta sing it to the tune of the Trogdor song)
We free the prisoners!!! :)
We shoot the prisoners??? :(
âRaina? How can you shoot them where they stand?â So itâs more merciful to let them explode? NAH FAM
This scientist is responsible for the mind control stuff? For Benezia? Fine   Iâll let her go but I hope she explodes
We did not learn our lesson concerning beacons I see
Wait if even Saren is worried about his mind control ship does that mean there are larger forces involved here?
Oh. Oh fuck
Ugh Ashley I EXPLICITLY TOLD YOU NOT TO DIE
(so we really never found any info about that genophase cure huh? disappointing)
Oh Seren, you dumb dumb. You absolute fool. Clown man.
When Raina slings Kaiden over her shoulder to carry him to the shipâmmmmmmmmwoooow I am very bisexual
Bruh Raina takes every council call and she disconnects pissed off every time
WAIT I literally just hung up with the council, ASHLEY is DEAD, and Kaiden needs a DTR RIGHT NOW?!?!? Boy, NO, READ THE ROOM
This has been a stressful day
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode six
Shepard will avoid her feelings and go to Faros instead
Seeing Ashleyâs figure greyed out and her locker inaccessible makes me sad
Wrex and Garrus, letâs go shoot some geth đŞÂ
A mind controlling planetâof course!
Shep gets all her renegade points shooting capitalists
Saved, uh, about half the colonists
If I have one more bad acid trip I stg
Oh nope hereâs another one
Shep needs a nap
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode seven
Ah, the council. Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal.
At least Liara is good at pep talks ;)
Joker, you cockblock
Haha DUDE we airborne, you THOUGHT
Now that I am exiled from the Citadel, guess Iâll run some galactic errands:
o  Killed corporate scientists who though we would rescue them lol
o  Destroyed a bunch of geth camps helping Tali on her pilgrimage
o  Disabled a nuke and killed some pirates
o  Shut down some evil Cerberus experiments
o  And illegally traded information!
Okay time to get back on track
So we may or may not be flying to our doom
OH GOD LIARA LOVES ME!!! RAINA, YOU DISASTER, YOU DID IT AAAAAH â¤ď¸â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
frecklef0x plays mass effect: (ME1) episode eight
You know what I love? Being murdered by geth armatures
All these Ilos ruins be looking the same
Security panel is only kinda helpful
Oh, luckily I know Prothean now!
âCANNOT BE STOPPEDâ wow very encouraging, thanks
After that super motivating message and disabling security, its time to go down, down to goblin town
Vigil? Oh word?
My girlfriend is GEEKING out
I knew something what wrong with that fucking Citadel
Vigil: information is power. Also Vigil: What does it matter why they do what they do? All that matters is you stop them
ânon-essentialâ personnel die first, huh? GROSS, VIGIL (gotta be honest that hits different in 2020)
Garrus gets it, I knew we liked that guy
Okay, find conduit, save galaxy, break millennium-old genocide cyle, nbd
Ugh Mako you gotta do me dirty one last time I see, I hate this thing
THE CONDUIT STRAIGHT YEETED MAKO
The citadel robot says weâre doomed : )
This shootout is SO fun, seriously
Saren get it toGETHER
Renegade Raina can kill with a conversation apparently, well done then
Concentrate on the Sovereignâwhy am I gonna save a council that hates my guts, sorry, but I have a JOB to DO that you ACTIVELY HINDERED
Great, zombie husk Saren, just what I needed as I mull over the possible consequences of my galaxy-altering decision
GO JOKER GO
Humanity-only council seemsâŚquestionable. Raina didnât love the council but this sits wrong. Couldnât we just appoint a more diverse council, including a human?
Anderson seems like a good enough dude, soâŚweâll see.
