I just sent my draft to my committee
And I confirmed my proposal defense date.
I’m fine. Totally chill. 🙃

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I just sent my draft to my committee
And I confirmed my proposal defense date.
I’m fine. Totally chill. 🙃

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A little update on my life: I passed my proposal defense! The main thing that they comment on is my inability to show my understanding on the paper. I explained very well and panels said that they finally totally understand my thesis after my presentation. Basically, my writing sucks! But for me, its not about writing. Its actually about my way of thinking and my struggles in translating my thinking processes into words.
I am an INTj (according to many tests I took). One of the INTJ struggle is in explaining things. They know some things and they uderstand it fully but when you ask them how they get to that point, they have trouble in explaining it to you. So, my supervisor awares of this weakness of mine. He always asked me to explain things in layman term, using simple words, especially in presentation. He even asks me to write it through a logical step or flows that comprehensible for others. He wants me to show how I connected all the dots and ways to see patterns in things.
I am still working on this but I hope it’s get better in time.
My supervisor wants me to send phd proposal tomorrow and he only told me to do it this evening. Honestly, my chapter 2 is only 10% done but I cannot say no to him because he knows that I truly work when under pressure. But, there is so many things to write in one night. To make matter worse, I had spent the whole day doing laborious work that makes my body ache. I just arrived at my house and after 3 weeks vacation in my hometown, my room is in a total mess. I can’t work in a messy room. Before my hyperfocus can kick in due to panic, I need to clean up my room, or else it won’t work.
Weirdly, last night I dreamt of someone who looks like my supervisor asking about my thesis and inquired about why I still haven’t complete it. After being inquired by him, I remember going back to what I perceived my room. That room was dirty and messy which worsen my anxiety. I woke up in panic! Then this whole send-proposal-tomorrow happens evening after that dream. 😫
Two days left until orals and my dissertation proposal defense (yes, my department has you do them at the same time...) and I have once again turned into a book-hoarding, fire-breathing dragon. At this point, I’m fairly certain I could toast marshmallows and make s’mores with the flames I’ve been spitting at minor inconveniences.Â
I have proposal defense, and what do i do?
WHY ON EARTH AM I READING SWORD ART ONLINE PROGRESSIVE?

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Thursday : jsdhfksjhfjhdfhsk
Welp today I got to the office late but man idek what happend today. All I know is that we readied ourselves for the Proposal Defense tomorrow. We’re really tensed and so skjdfkljdkvkxcnvsjdfkhswdfawuherfkrfsb over it because we’re going to be the first like thE VERY FIRST group to present tomorrow. We spent the day rehearsing our parts, and then deciding what stuff to give out to our panelists tomorrow for snacks. We worked a lot for this proposal and tomorrow is going to be a big day. Gonna have to do our best tomorrow and ask God to do the rest.
WISH US LUCK !!!!!!! sdfjldskfjdlkdjlasdk
Almost that time!
It is almost that time! This weekend has been crazy! It all started on Friday when my Siberian Husky (and furry kid) Bruce got sick. I took him to the vet and he ended up spending the night in the Vet ER. It was a weekend of checking on him, giving him additional medicine, and hoping for answers. It reminded me of the feeling when I was working so hard to get my own DX. Each doctor, or in Bruce’s…
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im done easing out the nerves
or did i even ease out the nerves?
im still freaking nervous and i'm getting so freaking nervous by the hour
i wanna puke
i want this over with