#proconlist

Usually I get over these lame crushes quickly. I hate that I have been drawn towards this person since I met them, but then realized like 5 months ago I was attracted to them. There are a million reasons why I shouldn’t be. I have scribbled lists, tried to avoid them and create goals for myself in order to stay busy because I know it’s not mutual.

So it’s time to put the list in print:

Selfish - never once have I ever heard her ask someone how they are.

Flaky - biggest con bc I have too many memories regarding moments when people didn’t show and it impacted me as a child. I mean hello text me that it won’t work to go to the beach, it sounded like you were making an excuse and didn’t want to say no - although you never had a problem saying no the other few times I asked you if you wanted to do something (yeah I’m kinda mad at myself for asking 3 times).

Drama queen - holy crap. It’s like she loves to be the center of attention and waits for the perfect moment to drop some crazy story.

Pretty sure she self sabatoges herself with relationships jumping back and forth between the same people using people for their things (maybe it’s good I’m poor). Pretty sure even if I had a shot she would end up breaking my heart.

The peeps who know us both tell me to run to hills because she isn’t good enough for me.

Not 100% sure she is honest. She tells these crazy stories and later on more of it comes out and I find that it’s not always matching with the last story.

Attention seeker - I know she is an only child I get that meant all attention on her but damn learn to interact better.

Only texts/messages/fb comments when she is bored. Literally doesn’t communicate then suddenly likes every post. WTF!!

Pros (clearly if I like her then there are good things too:

Brilliant - ugh ridiculous smart

Funny - her stories are dramatic and crazy but she tells them in an amazing way.

Open Book - it’s nice to see someone so open because my past trauma made me close down - it’s like the Great Wall protects me - only some people manage to make it past it and know me completely.

Adorable - she is impossible to read, but when she actually really smiles it’s real not fake.

Adventurous - always talking about traveling and she has been all over hiking/camping.

Awkward - she makes me not seem awkward at times. Her awkwardness is fucking adorable.

the danish institute for study abroad one

pros:

denmark is nice

psych program looks good

cons:

they don't have a summer program

the university of jordan one:

pros:

I'm interested in the language

it's in the summer, which I want because for financial reasons and so I won't get behind in my studies

cons:

not relevant to my major (although maybe I could use it to pick up a minor?)

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