#physically drained

March 11, 2025

I was contemplating ending everything. I was in so much pain and couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.

As weird as it sounds I didn't go through with it because God help me get out of my toxic relationship and I didn't want to disappoint him. I realized that he was the only one who stood by my side when I was spiralling out of control. He was the only one who listen to me when I was crying, asking for help. He never made me feel like a burden for expressing how I felt.

I went online and took an appointment with a doctor. 220$ for the appointment but it was worth it. I explained to the doctor what was happening and she told me that I was having a burnout and that my body was shutting down due to stress. I lied to her and said that I didn't have s****dal thoughts because saying it out loud was too scary for me and I didn't want her to put me on antidepressants (I used to take them as a teen and hated how I felt while taking them) so I just told her about my breakup and work. I was put on a work leave for a month and she prescribed me sleeping pills.

I decided that I'm going to do a whole bunch of reminder pieces to be made as stickers or posters on walls. Take your meds is the next one that will be going into the shop next week.