#personal tragedies

No. Per se, love is not enough to make a relationship last. Love may be THE essential element to make a relationship start, but it isn't, by any means, enough to make the romance last.   This is a very sad truth. And, once again, a truth that I had to learn the hard way - and, in this case, the hard way means that pain will hit you hard.   We are a collection of personal tragedies. A relationship is no more than a series/cinematic crossovers - two different universes that merge in a very strange and, sometimes, astounding way. It is amazing how it can work, but, many times, it does and it feels good. But to make a crossover last... well, it's almost impossible, isn't it?   The problem lies all in the plot of our singular lives - in most cases, it's impossible to merge our script with the script of someone else and turn into a whole new script. Yes, love gathered us, but love cannot keep us together.   The are many things that can separate us. Religion. Politics. Family issues. Ethnic/racial differences (yes, that still is an issue in 2020). A pandemic. A war. Job careers. University. Moving to another town or country. The distance itself. Traumas (rape or domestic violence, for example). Money (always that bastard). Mental illnesses. Prejudice. Misunderstandings. Drugs, alcohol, and addictions in general. The use of certain medicines that can lead to severe personality changes. Intrigues (that already happened to me). A crime. A tragic event, like an accident. Different tastes and interests. Physical illnesses...   ... and changes in general, personal changes, the real changes we cannot escape from. Yes, we are not the same person all the time, we change and, many times, our changes may not be compatible with the person we love. Sometimes, we still love that person with all our heart... but love is no longer enough. It never was, but we were blind until we started to see. It's not love that hurts - seeing hurts.   Maybe we were all meant to love and love, sometimes, is meant to last - but relationships aren't and that's why breaking up hurts so much.   (oh, don’t need to mention it - the tittle of this text was actually inspired by a Patty Smyth song)     Yours,

A few years later, I lost my dad in a work accident where he was basically crushed to death. This was also during the summer. I remember the lady on the phone, perhaps the receptionist at the company, yelling to speak to my mom, us going to the hospital, receiving the news from the doctor who’d also brought with her a priest to say something (I think I remember something about how the priest had his father for 9 years while I had mine for 19 and I should be grateful); a girl who had just taken a bunch of pills was being hospitalized just a few rooms down from where the hospital had my dad’s body. We had Quiznos at the end of the day.

There was a small sign on the door of this Thai restaurant I went to today that read “remember the fallen” and it got me sad. We’re reminded constantly to “never forget” this day, and I wish this wasn’t the phrase, because I don’t think anyone conscious and alive that day ever could, but also, there’s nothing really poignant about remembering the day itself. A small group crashed planes into buildings trying to make a statement against what they thought we stand for as a country. For the people who didn’t know a victim, this day probably reads more like an awful thing that happened that cost many other people’s lives, made flying a bigger hassle, and turned a region in the world into a target for racism. Meanwhile, there are people out there who can’t do much about the fact that they lost a friend or a family member that day, and that they lost them to what happened that day; these are people who probably think about that love one every now and then, and who wonder about what it would’ve been if that day never happened, or even worse, about the fact that this was how those fallen ones helplessly spent their last moments on Earth.