#ointb

Maybe that was the problem.

You had been a fuck up your whole life and were used to figuring it all out on your own. You didn't know how to rely on others, how to trust them to catch you when you fell. Plus, there was a little piece of you that felt you owed this to Red. If you could keep Pornstache from taking her kitchen and starting a war on her business… it would repay the million different ways that she had saved you over the last two years.

It was fine until Red had said something particularly aggressive toward Pornstache, and he had decided to take it out on you. Now you lie in your bed, bruises already appearing on your arms, hips, and even a couple of small ones around your throat. A poorly bandaged cut along your ribs was bleeding; you could feel it start to soak into the fabric of your shirt, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Everything hurt, and you couldn’t stop the tears that were running down your face. He had threatened to kill you the next time Red spoke to him in that way, but trying to get Red not to antagonize him was a death mission all on its own.

“Dorogoy (sweetheart), it is time to start making breakfast. Let’s go before my whole schedule is fucked up,” Red says, pulling her hoodie from the shelf.

“I…I am not feeling well,” you murmur, curling your body away from her. “Go without me. I can send Nicky to give you backup.”

“Nicky likes to burn everything,” your bunkmate counters, coming to sit on the edge of your bed. “Was it the nightmares again?” When you shake your head she tries a different approach. “Let me check your forehead. I can cook you up a remedy.”

She grabs your arm gently to turn you, but comes into contact with a bruise that makes you cry out. Her brows furrow into confusion as she immediately takes her hand away. As you flinch, her eyes catch onto the bruises around your neck. An anger flares through her, and her next words come out in a hiss.

“What happened to you?”

“Nothing,” you lie, attempting to move from her.

“I fucking hate liars,” Red retorts, her hand hovering over your body, too afraid to touch you again. “You are hurt. Now tell me why.”

You know that any further argument is useless. Red has always been able to tear the truth out of you, no matter how hard you try to keep it. You sit up unsteadily, your hand automatically going to cover the cut along your side. Red eyes darken, and you automatically flinch as if she were going to hit you. Instead, her hand comes to rest gently on your cheek.

“I am not mad at you. You are safe. I got you rebenok (child),” she soothes, knowing exactly how to cloak your anxious thoughts. “Tell me what has been going on.”

It comes out in a rush that you can’t hold back. How Pornstache has been trying to take the kitchen from Red, the way he threatened to get you transferred if you didn’t comply. When he got you on the hook, you explained how he would threaten you with solitary confinement or ways to hurt Red. You are crying as Red pulls you to her so her fingers can run gently through your hair. She kisses your temple gently.

“I am so sorry…I just wanted to feel like… like all the trouble you put into me was worth something,” you mumble.

“Oh, moya lybov’ (my love), you are worthy of love exactly as you are. You do not need to prove to me that you deserve to be part of the family. You already are. It was and never will be any trouble to love you,” Red says, wiping away the tears rolling down your face. She leans forward to press a kiss on your hairline. “I can lose my kitchen, but what I can't lose is you. I would die if I lost you. This stops now. He touches you again, and I chop his dick off and feed it to him. Understand me?”

You let her words cloak you, and it soothes your heart slightly, but there is still a nagging fear in you. Nothing good has ever been in your life for long, and the two years that you have spent with Red are already pushing it. The older woman wraps her arm around your waist, her hand coming to cover the cut.

“Let’s go clean you up.”

You let Red guide you to the kitchen, and every step feels like the world is pressing in on you. Your body is sore, your heart is heavy, and your mind is in a cloak of darkness. It is still early in the morning, and most people are still wrapped up in their beds. It makes it easy to get there, but someone is waiting for you when you arrive.

“Gloria…what are you doing in my kitchen?” Red sneers, her whole body tensing so that her fingers curl into you.

Before Gloria can respond, you whimper in pain. Red curses her hand, gesturing towards the medical kit on the wall. “Hand me that.”

Gloria is by your side in a second with the kit in hand. You are leaning heavily against the counter in the kitchen as Red pulls up your shirt. Gloria can’t help but gasp as she sees the cut along your side. It is followed by a growl that seems to shake the room.

“I will fucking murder him.”

Gloria looks between you and Red for a moment, the anxiety in her building. “You mean a CO did this to her?”

The older woman nods her body tense as her fingers trace the bruises along your ribs. Her hands go to pull up your shirt but you try to protest.

“I have to make sure this is the only one, dorogoy,” Red explains and finally you relent.

You can feel your face redden as Gloria takes in the rest of your chest. There is a flicker of desire that only lasts for a moment before it is replaced by horror. You think you have gotten used to the reaction but a little piece of you wanted Gloria to be different. Your eyes fall for a moment until Gloria grabs your hand in hers. It’s the first time you have felt calm since last night but you don't look at her too afraid of what you will find in her brown eyes.

“There are cuts on her chest,” she says quietly as if afraid to point them out.

“They are old,” you and Red say in unison.

Once Red accounts for every old scar and documents the new one she moves to bandage your cut. She brings over a bowl of water and soap and you already dread what is going to happen next. Red’s eyes flick up to Gloria and your combined hands.

“Stop her from screaming, whatever you have to do. Do it.” Red commands as she dips the rag first into the soapy water.

You are watching her do it until Gloria grabs your chin and pulls you to look at her. You barely feel the first dab in the soap as she smiles at you. You have been craving for that smile to be directed at you for months.

“My mother used to tell me when the cut stung little soldados were coming to fight back the invaders in my body,” she tells you as you squeeze her hand at a particularly sensitive spot. “I told her she was a liar. If something was working for me, it wouldn't be so painful.”

Red dabs your cut again and you almost scream when Gloria places a finger softly against your lips. “No, I'm not done with my story.” You bite down on your bottom lip to contain a whimper. Gloria squeezes your hand gently, her other going to cup your cheek. “My mother went on to tell me that pain was how we made sure we were still alive. That experiencing pain, living through it, and knowing it may come again is what keeps us alive. I'm so sorry this happened to you, but I am so grateful you are alive.”

A couple of tears stream down your face and you aren’t certain if it is from the pain or her words. She moves both hands to cup your face, her thumbs wiping away the tears, as she places her forehead against yours. “I'm so grateful you are alive.”

Red coughs lightly which causes Gloria to push away but her hand automatically finds its way back to yours. You look down on the cut Red has properly bandaged this time and you smile at the older woman.

“Thank you Mama,” you whisper. You don't call her that often, and every time you do it immediately lights up the darkest parts of Red.

She leans over to kiss your hairline. “Of course, but you heard what I said. No more.”

You nod looking at the clock before you look down at your soaked shirt. There isn't enough time to get back to your bunk to get a new one and you aren't sure what will cover the stain. Within seconds a shirt is being thrusted out towards you. You turn to find Gloria’s long sleeve shirt she wears underneath her normal shirt is in her hands.

“You can wear this.”

“But…”

“I can go back to my bunk. You can't.”

You pull on the shirt as Red throws the bloody ones in the trash. The counter is cleaned off and if it hadn't been for the three of you in that room no one would have known anything happened. The rest of the kitchen staff is starting to filter in when Pornstache makes an appearance in the door. There is fire in his eyes and you instinctively shudder trying to step away from him.

“She isn't going with you,” Red snarls, automatically stepping in front of you.

Pornstache’s smile only broadens as he looks at the older woman. “I have no idea what you are talking about. I came here to show Caputo this little operation you have been running.”

Your heart sinks when you realize this was always his plan. He was always going to take the kitchen from Red. It was his only goal in life,to torture and break her, first by destroying her pseudo daughter then by taking her safe haven. Red knows it too as her hand curls into a fist.

“Do you want it?” Caputo asks, gesturing towards Gloria.

That's when your brain finally snaps back into place. He is offering her the kitchen and it doesn't surprise you when she takes it, or even asks for her girls to come in. With a higher pay and the ability to not have to scrub toilets anyone would have taken it.

What does surprise you is when she turns and pokes her finger lightly into your chest. “Except you, you are staying with me.” She leans in slightly whispering in your ear. “I'm not letting him take you.” However her sweet words are stomped on when she slips the mask back on her next phrase louder for the whole room to hear. “Plus if you stay, Red won't be tempted to sabotage me.”

In that moment only one thing is clear, you will always be a bargaining chip used against the only woman who has ever shown you an ounce of compassion.

“This is ridiculous!” Red argues, stepping towards you.

“It's her kitchen, she keeps who she wants. If you want to debate my authority I can have you sent to the SHU for all this contraband.” Caputo retorts, crossing his arms.

Red throws her arms up in defeat but sends one final glance to you. She mouths I love you before heading out the door. Your hand automatically wraps around her chef’s jacket before Caputo can take that from you. Pornstache winks at you before he leaves and you feel like vomiting.

Once the kitchen has cleared there is an awkward silence that falls over the room. As if the kitchen itself doesn't know what to do now the angry Russian is gone. Gloria finally turns to you and some of the softness is back in her features but yours…is hard as stone.

“Y/N,” she says as if trying to explain.

“We are already behind schedule,” you respond, cutting her off. “If we don't catch up now we will be fucked the rest of the day.”

You pull on Red’s chef jacket and hat before turning to the stoves and bringing them to life. Gloria attempts to speak again but the sound of her noisy girls bring her to a halt. Breakfast is chaos, but you keep the kitchen on time so that there's some semblance of order by the time dinner ends.

When you finally return to your bunk, you are exhausted, and in more pain that you thought possible. Red is sitting up in her bed flipping through the pages of a book she has stolen from your pile. You flop down next to her, extending out a bowl of food.

“You didn't come to visit me all day.”

“I'm not eating that food,” Red grimaces but stares down at the bowl. “This is my recipe.”

“Couldn't let you just eat ramen,” you shrug but let a huff of air when Red hugs you to her.

“Thank you moya lybov’.”

“By the way, I love you too Mama,” you say resting your head on her shoulder.

“I could get used to hearing you say that.” Red smiles responding before biting into her food. With her fork she points at your bunk. “Your new boss dropped something off for you.”

You see your favorite candy bar sitting on your pillow. You sit up to grab it and notice the note underneath it written in Gloria’s loopy handwriting: I'm so grateful you are alive. You try to let the words soothe you but all you can remember is what came after. You were tired of being a pawn in this prison game. With a simple toss over the half wall you give the candy bar to Boo, but Red notices the way you pocket the note before sitting next to her again.

“I have my own money, I don't need her shit,” you say gruffly.

- Doesn't understand social boundaries

- Gets arrested for taking a child to her house when she thought she was just with her "friend". She gets charged with kidnapping and involuntary manslaughter because of accidental death.

- Gets fixated on people or things easily

- Remembers speicific details about people

- Gets anxious when overstimulated or doesn't know things in advanced

- Struggles to make friends with people her own age

- Overshares information

- Has a child like persona

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Submitter also added:

Has unspecified mental health condition which doens't get treated properly because she's in prison