#newtoblogging

Why is it so hard to make positive changes in your life?

I wrote out a month ago how I wanted to make some positive changes to my daily routine, I have not achieved any of them except one. I was finally able to be productive on my days off. I'm cleaning more, taking care of myself, and my animals. Prioritizing the important things in life right now.

I still want to make more positive changes in my life though. In order to start my spiritual journey and self-discovery I need to get more proactive with it. Because right now I am letting my depression and lack of energy get the best of me.

I'm going to give myself a break this month because my fiance' and I just went through something kind of emotionally tiring. We had our first chemical pregnancy, this was his first lost with me and I feel awful about it. But it's not my first loss. I feel bad about it because he was so excited when we finally got a positive I did too, unfortunately it was short live. Now all we can do is pray and continue trying. My TTC journey is going to continue, but right now it'll be put off until we both heal and get in a better place.

Right now I just want to focus on bettering myself, my living environment and relieve some of the stress that we are both currently taking on. Once we get to a better place mentally and emotionally then we will continue and be better than ever.

Things will get better from here. I just need to focus on me and him. Stop stressing and worrying about things that are outside of my control. Maybe with the positivity I can get in a better mindset and start focusing on what I wanted to do in the first place.

Thank you for reading my story and I promise that I'm not trying be negative. Things just have not went well this past weekend. The stress is starting to get to me and I really need some relief from it and coming on here and being able to write it out helps me tremendously. So, thank you.

HELLO fellow blogging community and friends! My name is Kristy and I know nothing about what it takes to manage a blog, but I am eager to learn and see where this little venture will take me. However, I am most excited about learning more about myself in the process; I am curious by nature. 

I’ll say upfront that I don’t consider myself particularly witty, introspective, thought-provoking or other “capturing” adjectives that would make for an exciting, grab-my-attention blog, but I do think. A lot. I have just struggled with how to convey my thoughts in a palatable and accessible way. I hope that through this blog, I can grow and stretch this weakness and find my voice. 

Enough of that. 

Why did I decide to start a blog? As with most humans in this crazy game of life, I have been battling a few things that have made me pause to evaluate what I find important, what defines my values and what shapes my beliefs. I don’t think that I will ever have it all pretty and neatly packaged because life takes you in all sorts of directions and challenges you in ways you never expected, so I think it’s a constant learning experience and won’t every be “completed”, but I do feel that you can hone in on those specific over-arcing “themes” that shape you. Those themes that drive and motivate your behaviors and choices. You can find the core to which all things are evaluated against. Because I came to this personal “pause and reflect” moment, I made the choice to be bold, take a risk, allow myself to be vulnerable and share my story - whether anyone comes along for the journey or not. It’s an opportunity for me to get out of my head. 

I want to share all aspects of my little version of life and see what shapes up. So brace for anything - but my interests tend to center around: food and wine, travel, music, theatre, art and architecture, culture, history, health, wellness and my faith...which makes me so unique, right? Ha. And I won’t put the pressure on myself to make every entry something truly defining or dripping with meaning. This is to be fun and provide me a creative outlet. There will most certainly be lots of talk about FOOD. I love it, even if I cannot eat it right now. (More on that later!)