#n2n

what do you mean micah’s birthday is the same as monet’s

G!

O!

O!

D!

unfortunately since i like to write chapters out of order, i can’t post all of them here, but trust this will be finished in like a week bc i’m going so crazy over it,,

summary:

Gabe doesn’t know why he is the way he is. He understands that he shouldn’t be here. He understands why his sister hates him, why his father won’t look at him, why his mother tries to ignore him because that’s what she needs to do.

But no amount of begging will change what he is. And nothing is able to hold down that little shard of him that always makes everything worse. Not even the part that, deep down, cares about his family. If he loves them, why is he hurting them?

— 

so i was reading rumble fish in class today (by se hinton my queen) and SPOILERS SPOILERS.

at the end of the book, rusty-james goes colorblind due to shock, just like his brother the motorcycle boy was.

quote//

“i stared straight ahead at the flashing light. there was something wrong with it. i was scared to think about what was wrong with it, but i knew, anyway. it was gray. it was supposed to be flashing red and white and it was gray. there wasnt any colors anywhere. everything was black and white and gray.”

NOW. lately ive been hyperfixating on next to normal and IF YOU KNOW ME YOU KNOW I FIND CONNECTIONS. i find connections between unrelated pieces of media. this time though? its a little too perfect.

in the song “you don’t know” (in next to normal of course), diana says, “do you know, do you know, whats it like to die alive? / when a world that once had color fades to white and grey and black”

WHICH IS JUST-????? LITERALLY. similar wording. and this is after rusty-james’ brother die in front of him.

diana watched her son die in front of her.

everything for both of them is in black and gray and white.

THATS ALL CONNECTIONS I LOVVVE CONNECTIONS 🤤🤤🤤

ily gabe ok? Ok

“Birds are singing things are growing!”