#multiple hobbies

Watercolour is my go-to medium, but they’d all dried out beyond return, so I ordered new ones and used some forgotten acrylics I’d found.

My therapist is insistent that I try new creative outlets - particularly ones I’m not good at - to test my limits with perfectionism and executive dysfunction, which, like… okay it is helping a lot, actually, but does it have to feel so uncomfortable the whole time?

So I’m there painting last night and I’m seeing a new beauty to acrylics and how they don’t blend the same way, they can be so much more precise etc., and I’m now really into the acrylics scene. Meanwhile, I’m currently waiting for my watercolour paint delivery and I’m concerned I’m about to neglect them a whole second time ‘cause I got myself a new acrylic fixation.

Then there’s the added issue of trying to fit this new venture into the limited time left around all my other hobbies (writing, reading, piano, singing, and calligraphy, if anyone’s interested) which feels pretty daunting.

But then I realise; somewhere between taking up this ridiculous amount of hobbies and now, Ive become too preoccupied with the possibilities of my day to remember to worry about the quality of my work.

My mindset has shifted from ‘I’m scared to start this because what if it’s bad?’, to ‘I can’t wait to see what I make today!’ and I didn’t even notice the change.

The things I’m creating might be mostly crap, but I am creating a lot of stuff. More importantly, I’m enjoying the process. And one day the stuff I make will be good, like, really good. And they will never get the chance to exist if I don’t make all these lesser versions first.

I mean, now I have the too many things, too little time conundrum, and I have amassed more terrible paintings than I know what to do with, more badly-played songs than I can remember, and learning calligraphy left-handed is like fighting an uphill battle, but it’s a much more pleasant issue to have than being terrified into inaction.

The point I’m making is:

and being a workaholic isn't nice either. you either try to find some stuff to work on or turn everything that's fun into work, putting pressure on yourself. and it pressures you to complete the task, or face the consequences of being a failure to everyone else.