#mawage

Now, I can’t possibly say anything that would speak to all personality types, or cultures, or stages in life, etc — so I will just write what worked for me, if that’s all right?

I knew my husband was the one bc of something you actually touched upon… boredom. My husband is the first and only person that I never get bored of. And you’re probably thinking that’s silly, but for me it’s the truth. I’m an introvert with social anxiety, so most of my interactions with ppl (even my friends!) can stress me out/fill me with panic. My husband is the first person who I don’t need a break from when I come home. In fact, he calms me down and is my safe space 💜 I love my parents to smithereens, but even after a few days of vacation, I would always need to do something solo — but with him I was locked inside an apt during the pandemic for over a year and, honestly, it was kinda great 😅

In the past when I was dating, I used to keep all my quirks and eccentricities under wraps. With him, I never had to. I could be myself. That being said, we compliment each other — I feel like being with me has made him more goofy, and being with him has made me try to have at least a little structure in my life 😂 We communicate — everything. If something is bothering one of us, we tell each other and do something about it. We travel ✈️ we want to see the world together, and how can you get bored doing that? We listen, even when the other is talking about a subject that we know nothing about, or wouldn't usually care for. *Cough cough* Harry Potter Erotica™️ for him 😆 I don’t understand half the stuff he tells me about coding, but I love it when he talks about it, bc his face will light up, and I love that shit.

I knew he was the one from how he used to help me do dog walks (one of my jobs) after a hard day of doing his own (much more stressful) job. I knew he was the one when he’d drive my dad to his chemo appointments in the mornings when he knew I’d stayed up all night crying. I knew he was the one when I came home one night super homesick after a long day, and he made me my favorite meal from my home country. I knew he was the one when he never treated me differently bc of my past sexual trauma, but helped me work thru it, and experiment, and bought me toys until I could finally (finally!!!) come. (Yeah, sex can be an important part of a lot of relationships, I don’t like pretending like it isn’t 😉) I knew he was the one because of how he treated me, my family, and the things I cared about.

I knew he was the one bc the thought of spending forever with him doesn’t freak me out. It excites me! Like, let’s fucking do this stupid thing called life together! 🥳

Obviously I just got married, so what do I really know, but we’ve been together for 8 years bc I had some of the same fears as you. I wanted to make sure everything was right, and the thought of it falling apart breaks my heart. But sometimes you gotta take that leap ♥️

Could something happen to one of us? Absolutely. Do I sometimes cry thinking of having to go on without him, or something happening to me and thinking about him and my dog all alone? Yes. I’m doing it right now, bc that thought fucking sucks. But at the end of the day, it’s really true:

Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.