Jon, you dingbat! Pay more attention to the people you work with! Melanie doesnāt even work at the Institute and she could tell NotSasha wasnāt the real Sasha!!
āOhā¦. No, is that another Sasha? Are you collecting them?ā
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Jon, you dingbat! Pay more attention to the people you work with! Melanie doesnāt even work at the Institute and she could tell NotSasha wasnāt the real Sasha!!
āOhā¦. No, is that another Sasha? Are you collecting them?ā

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MAG076 - Caso 0171302 ā āEl aroma de la sangreā
Testimonio de Melanie King, sobre sus continuadas investigaciones sobre "fantasmas de gerra"
[Disclaimer/ Aviso]
[MAG075] | x | [MAG077]
jonathan āyes i know what a meme isā sims
Small Melanie&Tim things:
- Holder of āfuckā
(MAG065) ARCHIVIST: Well, excuse me if my experiences of thā TIM: Your experiences? Fuck you! I got eaten by worms because of you!
(MAG131) ARCHIVIST: Oh, I⦠Melanie, IāIām so sorry, Iā MELANIE: Oooh, fuck off?!
- Holder of āassholeā
(MAG117) MELANIE: Elias thinks heās got this ingenious way to hurt people, but itās just the same old bullshit in a creepy new package. ⦠Assholeā¦
(MAG119) ARCHIVIST: Tim!! [STATIC:] What do you see? TIM: I see my asshole boss! Wā wait⦠waitā¦
- Asbestos.
(MAG028) MELANIE: Anyway. Weād been angling to go into the CMH for months, er, but I couldnāt get permission. Apparently thereās asbestos in the walls? It makes it, uh, ātoo much of a health and safety hazardā.
(MAG090) ELIAS: [SIGH] Tim⦠This place is very old. It has all sorts of⦠idiosyncrasies, and not all of them are good for the people who work here. TIM: I think Iād prefer asbestos.
- That-bi-crush-on-the-Real-Sasha
(MAG076) MELANIE: Whereās Sasha, by the way? I wanted to say goodbye. [ā¦] I havenāt seen her in a while. Oh. You didnāt fire her, did you? [ā¦] Tall, long hair, glasses⦠She was here when I first came in. Back last April? We had a long conversation about haunted pubs.
(MAG114) TIM: I knew Sasha for years, we⦠I donāt know Martin as well as I knew her.
- Not tolerating tape recorders anymore
(MAG098) MARTIN: [ā¦] Have you seen [Jon] sinceā¦? TIM: [GRUNT] Kind of. We tried to talk, but he, he reached for thatā Ah, he, he wanted to turn on his recorder. I freaked out a bit, and I said some stuff: if he wanted to talk, no tapes, I just, I just hate that thing.
(MAG136) THERAPIST: Right, have a seat. Do you mind if I record our sessions? MELANIE: I do mind. Yes. THERAPIST: Ah? I mean, itās just for my own notes. MELANIE: I categorically and completely do not give consent for you to make any recording of me, ever. Turn it off. Please.
- ⦠Apparently talking with each other behind tape recordersā back
(MAG106) ELIAS: You already have doubts, though. Youāve been talking with Tim, and have convinced yourself thatā MELANIE: [DRY LAUGHTER] ELIAS: āeven if Iām telling the truth, Iām too dangerous to live. MELANIE: Well.
- Conscious decision to avoid or stop doing Archival Assistant work altogether because The Eye/the place/this work is evil
(MAG098) TIM: Still doing those? MARTIN: ⦠Yeah. Yeah⦠I did ask Elias if I could stop. TIM: And he said ānoā for a mysterious reason? MARTIN: I donāt know? I mean, he kind of explained ā I think? Jonās ātoo inconsistentā at the moment. He needs to make up for the shortfall, which, I guess, means me. ⦠Unless you⦠TIM: No. MARTIN: He did suggest I try to get you involved, andā TIM: And I suggest that he not be a scary, magic psychopath. ⦠Whoops! Too late. MARTIN: ⦠Yeah. TIM: [SIGH] ⦠Sorry. MARTIN: No, Iā I get it. Heh. Theyāre not exactly much fun. TIM: Look, itās not that. I⦠[SIGH] This place is evil, Martin. And I think doing what It wants? Probably makes us evil. And It wants those things to be read. I mean, Iām not gonna stop you, but, at the same timeā MARTIN: Iā I get it.
(MAG150) MELANIE: Look. Iām not going to do my job anymore. ARCHIVIST: ⦠I am not sure I follow, youāyou know we⦠we canāt⦠quit, weāve all tried. MELANIE: I didnāt say I was going to quit. I said: Iām not going to do my job. No researching; no filing; no⦠field trips. Nothing that is going to help the Institute in any way. [ā¦] ARCHIVIST: Why? MELANIE: Because this place is evil, Jon. And so⦠doing this job⦠ARCHIVIST: [LOUD EXHALE] MELANIE: Helping it out⦠even in small ways, iāis in some way⦠evil too! Every time we try to use it to do good, it just seems to make everything worse, and⦠and I will not be a part of that anymore.
- ⦠and sickness due the aforementioned (experienced/planned ;;)
(MAG090) TIM: I hopped a flight to Malaysia. Found myself a hotel. ELIAS: I see. ⦠You were trying to leave us? TIM: Yeahā¦! ELIAS: But youāve returned. TIM: I⦠I got sick. The longer I was gone⦠I felt weak, like⦠like I was, I was losing myselfā¦
(MAG150) MELANIE: Iāll still be around, I just⦠I canāt be a part of this anymore. If, if I get sick, I get sick. And, and if I dieā¦
I'm at work, nearly done with S2, and jfc best moment goes to Jon's angry "Of course I know what a meme is." Ten out of ten.

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MELANIE KNOWS ITS NOT SASHA THANK FUCKING GOD
(MAG001) ARCHIVIST: It was a copy of the last photograph taken by her phone and sent to her sister Siobhan. The caption was ācheck out this drunk creeper, LOLā [el-o-el]
(MAG065) ARCHIVIST: Statement of Tessa Winters, regarding a strange computer program she downloaded from the Deep Web, three months ago. Is that accurate? TESSA: Well, first off, I didnāt find it on the āDeep Webā. ⦠God, itās like talking to my grandpa.
(MAG076) MELANIE: I was actually a meme for a day or two. ⦠You⦠do know what that is, donāt you? ARCHIVIST: Yes, I know what a meme is. You were saying?
(MAG081) ARCHIVIST: No-one ever believes me when I tell them my age. I, I donāt⦠know if itās the already greying hair or something in my demeanour, but they always act surprised when I mention being a child in the Nineties. I will admit the last few years have⦠aged me considerably.
+ Bonus: Grumpy Young Old Grampa gratuitously grumbling in his corner
(MAG097) ARCHIVIST: Georgie, whereās your fuseboā? Right. Right. Keep saying itās not meant to trip whenever one bulb goes, but āNo, Jon, I donāt want to bother the landlordā.
(MAG123) ARCHIVIST: Where did theā ⦠āComa, great! Letās rearrange his office. Sleeping people donāt need⦠pens.ā
! Belated realisation:
(MAG076) ARCHIVIST: Oh, good lord! Are you okay? MELANIE: Yes, itās not⦠as bad as it looks. ARCHIVIST: What did that? When? MELANIE: Just before I came in last time. And, er, best I can tell it was a 1940s surgical scalpel. ARCHIVIST: A scalpel? MELANIE: So. Can I make my statement now? [ā¦] It was only when I felt the scalpel slice into my shoulder that I realised what was happening, and thought to scream. Next thing I knew, I was being carried away by security guards. [ā¦] The cut was nasty, but not deep enough to do any real damage. As you saw, Iām getting quite a scar from it.
(MAG127) BASIRA: But [Melanie] did want me to⦠apologize. ARCHIVIST: Oh. BASIRA: From her. For⦠the shoulder. ARCHIVIST: Oh. It, itās fine; scalpel wounds⦠they heal quickly. BASIRA: Hm. ARCHIVIST: Too quickly, really. BASIRA: Already? ARCHIVIST: Just another scar for the collection!
They have matching scalpel-made shoulder scars!!
(Melanie will hate it!!!)