#lping

it causes my days off to no longer be days off. I get maybe $8 a month off of my partnership. My first videos often get upwards of like 100-200 views but the farther into the game I get, the more I simply get 10-20 views per video. And I basically never get any comments or viewer interaction at all (though the ones I do interact with do fill me with love and support <3 they're just... rare ): ).

I guess I feel like I'm putting videos up for almost no reason, now. Is it selfish of me to expect my viewers to actually comment on my videos or send me messages of support, or whatever?

I thought about stopping before, a year or two ago. I didn't stop for a reason that really was selfish. I was like, "hey, when I finish my books, I have a broad audience to advertise them to!"

Well, now my videos hardly get any attention because people have other LPers like markiplier to watch who have better personalities and are just all around better. I'm supposed to get a minimum of 10k views per month with my partnership, but I've dipped down below 7k recently despite LPing Watch_Dogs on day one. And considering the extra workload and stress LPing puts on me, I'm just... not sure it's worth it anymore.

It even feels therapeutic, thinking of playing games at my own pace and spending my first times playing games with myself rather than on a camera where I feel rushed to finish it.

Friend: You could play Slenderman.

Me: AFKNASJFGAN

Me: NO

Me: There are some games I will not play. That is one.

Friend: Almost got you to say Afghanistan. :P