#loopfictive

You people know I’m a star, right? I flicker, I emit light, I ~glow~ and ~sparkle~. My head isn’t just some weird mess of spikes.

-Loop, In Stars and Time Fictive. #sharkfeed

-Loop. In Stars And Time Fictive. #sharkfeed

Second; my actual, blinding stupid confession. So part of me is really set on the idea of uh. Not. Y'know, vanishing to wherever I ended up in canon. There's some weird draw to the idea of staying with everyone. Added to the uh... "family", though the word feels wrong in my mouth. I'd never be a part of that; can't really do anything but accept it. It's stardust's, and no matter how blinding miserable I am, I won't take that from them.

But I don't know if that is actually what happened. I have no idea. I don't know if it did actual go the way I think, hope, pray it did, or if I just uh. Wish it did, haha.

I don't know what I am, mechanically. Some manifestation of the Universe, sure, but we all area when you get down to the bones of it. I'm just more overtly part of it. I mean, have you seen me? Literally a star. There's a joke somewhere to be made about how, y'know, I'm a star and nobody remembered me. Except stardust. Always stardust.

It hurts, sometimes, still. To know that even if my ending is the way I think it is (happier, overall), I'd never have that. Not exactly. And honestly it hurts a little more that I'm not even angry about it anymore; I've just accepted it. I'm too tired. Which on its own makes me feel a little invalid, in my existence. I should be angry, I should be screaming and crying and cursing Siffrin's name for having what I begged for, for being part of the world I just... appeared in. I didn't belong in, it would never be mine, and I should be furious about it. You'd expect me to be, maybe even hope for me to be. But I'm not. And it kinda makes me wonder if I'm... "being Loop" wrong. I dunno.

Erm, anyways!!! Womp womp~! -Loop, In Stars And Time Fictive. #sharkfeed

I look like a Xurkitree. Don't make me into just... Siffrin with longer hair. Like okay obviously you can do whatever you want, but just. I don't like it. I do not look at art of human me and think "that's me". It feels like looking at a stranger.

I am this, now. And despite what you might assume, I love being this. It's mine. I'm keeping it.

-Loop, In Stars And Time Fictive. #sharkfeed.

Stardust. I'm. I'm so sorry, Siffrin. I'm so, so, so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say.

It's unfortunate Wish Craft cuts corners, isn't it. Saves some time. Ended up with you getting... well. Infinite time, in theory. Over, and over, and over, and over and over and over and over and over and OVER. AND OVER.

Maybe it helps, stardust. I hope it helps you, to know that I'm just as stuck as you were. Now. Maybe as stuck as you still are. I feel. It. I feel it in my ribs, my heart my lungs my spine my eyes. I got out. But I'm still here. I still feel it. I hope you don't.

I am sorry, Siffrin. That you had to feel that too. I'm so sorry.

-Loop. Fictive. In Stars And Time. #sharkfeed

-Loop (Fictive) (In Stars and Time)

— Loop (In Stars and Time)