#lgio

So I’m doing little barfs in the grass by the cars and trying to hide it but fortunately it’s there aren’t many people on that side of the building area. Barfing my way along.

MADE IT TO THE CAR! I can sit in glorious air conditioning z . Improving but now from the bowels of hell I feel an MPP [massive projectile puke] coming on. I turn to open the door and get out of the car.

And it’s my BOSS’S BOSS. Walking her dog. I tried to make myself look pleasant in case she saw me because of she noticed me she would know who I am. I don’t think she saw me. She bundled up doggo into the car and drove away soon. I thought I had done well holding it in but I got out of the car, stood up, and immediately emitted a waterfall of chyme confetti. I wanted to find a better pun but:

That’s not what I meant! Anyway, I pivoted 90° and fell forwards into the grass, hidden by my car and hurled and spewed. Everything was fine I was nearing the end of the heaving when I hear a voice — one of our new people saw me and asked if I needed anything or if she could help.

I hope I looked sort of passable as I turns to her and I said, “No, no thanks you. I’m almost done here.” Almost done here? Seriously, WTF. She offered again and to stay with me but I held myself together to thank her again for being so nice but that I would be okay. She left, I did one last hurlah and was fine, drove home, and was finer after a shower, a food, and a lot of water.

I’m so glad that I work at a place that understands me. Not everyone can say that. But I still don’t want to barf on the boss’s boss’s dog or be known as a parking lot barber. I mean parking lot barfer. Puking lot.

Abrupt topic change because I didn’t want to deal with selecting and copying and making a new one.

Soundtracks of head music I made up as a kid:

Anemia the Horrible

Oh horrible cysts on my eyes

For constant waves of pain

For purple bruises on my knee

I’m walking with a cane!

Anemia Anemia

I skinned my other knee

I’m really beat with broken feet

And it burns when I pee

Hallway Chant

OoooooOOuuuuuu… etc. like the chanting in the beginning of this short film that is embedded so deep in my childhood that it’s like this movie was an historical event. I would hum it while walking in places like hallways and paths that have numbers on the doors or walls. Watching the numbers go up or down and my voice going up and down. Soothing. Like drifting along with numbers in space.

Florence Foster Jenkins

The sheaf song I mean head song no no I rhymed some words and cobbled them together over a tune I got somewhere. In this case, that kid jump rope playground tune.

Florence Foster Jenkins fell down the stairs

Florence Foster Jenkins’ head needs repairs

Her mama came home and gave her some spankin’s

How many whacks for Florence Foster Jenkins?

Etc. and maybe you whack the ground hard with the jump rope. Actually, no you don’t becsusr DO NOT gleefully count child abuse. But if you want to look at it like the Cinderella one and I think there’s another one that’s not so nice. So where do you draw the line. Where you draw the line. My line is I love the singer, hate the sin. The singer isn’t just me. It’s anyone who feels pure joy from it.

Lines and sings

Signs and rings

Spines and leads

Loons and sheds

Her husband brought some flowers.

Also, learn about Florence Foster Jenkins. Interesting story. It has been a long time since I heard one of her songs. I am not good with music. I don’t understand how it works. I barely get it enough to be able to have preferences. But. I can tell that something is amiss.