#levi ship

She glanced over to see where he was headed and noticed a little boy stuffing tomatoes into his pockets a distance away. Her eyes widened.

Before she knew it, she was running. She zipped past the Garrison officer and grabbed the little boy's hand.

The boy looked up at her, startled.

She smiled into his dirt-stained face, “There you are! Ah, look at you-you got my tomatoes for me.”

The little boy stared at her with wide eyes as she reached over and paid the seller with a few coins. She glanced over her shoulder to see the Garrison officer staring at them with furrowed brows.

“Can I help you, officer?” she asked, casually. She felt the kids hand tighten in hers.

The officer straightened, “Er-No, ma’am.”

She gave him a half-assed smile before tugging the little boy’s hand. She walked down the street with him until they made it out of the market. He’d been awfully quiet the entire time. She didn’t consider herself terrible with kids but dealing with a situation like this? This would be new.

She glanced down at him, “Wh-“

Suddenly he released her hand and booked it.

Her eyes widened, “Hey!”

She ran after him. It didn’t take her long to catch up to him.

She grabbed his arm and he immediately swung around—pushing at her. All the tomatoes in his pockets spilled out and scattered about. The kid turned around, intending to run again but she grabbed his arm once-more.

“Enough!” her tone was stern, “You’re not in trouble. I want to help you.”

The kid froze, his head hanging down.

She didn’t release his arm as she bent down to one knee. She examined him—his clothes weren’t tattered. A bit dirt stained, yes, but not in the sense that made it seem he lived on the streets. Also to grab tomatoes instead of something typically directly edible like apples or bananas, she couldn’t help but wonder..

“Was that your first time stealing?” she asked, gently.

He didn’t respond, still not looking at her.

“You have to be more careful, that officer almost caught you.” she scolded, “You have to look around and check where the Garrison officers are before trying anything funny.”

The little boy’s head shot up. His eyes wide in shock.

“Are you hungry?” she asked.

He nodded.

She released his arm and dug into her bag. Of course, the one time it could’ve been useful she didn’t have any leftovers from culinary school today.

She withdrew a handful of coins and handed it to him, “Go to a vendor and buy yourself a meal.”

The boy seemed to hesitate before silently taking the money.

“Do you have parents?” she asked.

He nodded.

“You live with them?”

He nodded again. She couldn’t help but notice he was shaking slightly.

“They don’t feed you?” she inquired.

He shook his head.

She bit her lower lip, feeling a bit bad about prying since the boy was looking more uneasy by the second. She didn't mean to keep him for long, she just wanted to make sure that he had someone to look after him.

"Where are your parents?" she asked.

A moment of silence followed. The boy merely facing downwards once more. Just as she contemplated saying something else the boy answered,

"Mommy's at work. She's always working." his voice was low, the discontent clear in his tone.

Her eyes widened–he’d finally spoken.

Though she couldn't say she was surprised by his Mother's case. Nowadays with the price of food steeping higher since the food shortage-everyone seemed to be working more. She gestured towards the coins in his hand. In truth, she’d given him enough money to cover several meals.

“Make sure you buy something for Mommy too then.” she murmured.

He nodded, before suddenly running away again.

Just as she shot up to her feet, a familiar voice sounded from behind her.

“Oi, what do you say to someone who helped you?”

She swiftly turned around to see Levi gripping the kid by the collar with one hand. The boy’s eyes were wide with fear as he stared up at him.

The boy looked over at her, “T-thank you, miss.”

Levi released the kid’s shirt as she walked up to them. She gave Levi a lingering look before bending over to smooth out the boy’s ruffled-up shirt.

“Your welcome,” her voice was calm, “Do you know the bookstore by the market?”

The boy paused before shaking his head.

“That’s okay. Do you know where Dr. Bernard’s office is?”

The boy nodded.

“Great! If you keep going straight down that street you’ll find a bookstore. That’s where I work, okay? If you see me inside you can come in and say hi. And if you’re hungry, just tell me and we can share some snacks.”

The boy stared up at her blankly.

She squeezed his shoulders, “You better come and visit. I’ll be sad if you don’t.”

The boy looked away, his voice low, “Why.”

A slightly pained expression passed over Devon’s face before she let go of the boy’s shoulders. She couldn’t blame him for questioning it, she knew her younger self would’ve immediately been wary of an offer that sounded too good.

Her voice came out much softer than she intended, “Because I care. I care about what happens to you.”

The kid’s head snapped up to stare at her. The boy’s eyes glittered with shock.

She offered him a small smile-quickly swallowing back the ball of emotions she felt rising in her throat.

She waved him off, “Okay, go eat now. Don’t forget to get something for Mom too.”

The boy nodded, stepping backwards slowly. The kid seemed to hesitate, his eyes switching between her and Levi before lingering on Levi. Something seemed to flash in his eyes before he quickly waved Devon goodbye and scurried off. Her and Levi stood in silence, watching the kid disappear down the street.

“Brat gave me the stank eye.” he muttered.

A slight laugh escaped her, “I think he recognized you.”

He seemed to hesitate at that before turning to face her, “You sure you want him bothering you at work.”

She sighed, “He probably won’t come. I wouldn’t have.”

She faced him, her voice unconsciously dropping lower, “I didn’t think it would hurt to let him know.”

There was a look of knowing in Levi’s deep, steel gray eyes. He knew she was thinking of her younger self—that her younger self might’ve appreciated an offer like that. An offer of true help.

His eyes dropped to her lips.

She immediately flushed before asking, “How are you here?”

“Erwin dismissed us early.”

Her eyes lit up, “Again? How’d I get so unfortunate.” she teased before moving to sidle up to him.

Just as she was about to slip her arm through his, she froze. Something was off about his impassive countenance.

“What's wrong?” she asked immediately.

His hand slipped into hers, “Let’s go home first.”

She let him tug her along-silently letting him lead her back onto the main street, around the dispersed crowds. It was Friday so people seemed to be out and about, and in good spirits.

She suddenly stopped, her free hand clasping his wrist. He halted, glancing back at her.

“Tell me.” she urged, her voice uneven, “Tell me now.”

He searched her face, his gaze painstakingly gentle before squeezing her hand in his own. “We’re two minutes away-”

“I can’t breathe, Levi.” she quickly rushed out the words. It was true, the second he started to lead them home her uneasiness had grown by leaps and bounds. Her anxiety made her feel like she was going to burst. She knew she should be more patient than this but when it came to something bothering him of all people–she couldn’t take it.

He pulled her aside, so that they were no longer standing in the middle of the street. She slipped her hand out of his, hugging herself underneath her cloak–she needed to stop trembling.

He watched her with a strained expression before moving to take a step towards her. Her head snapped up, the silent question clear in her eyes. He wished she would have waited a moment longer–home was right there. 

“I’m leaving in two days.” his voice was flat.

He saw the realization hit her like a bullet. Her eyes immediately widening before her posture gradually shrank in on itself. She looked aside. He wished they were home with a gut-wrenching intensity.

He reached towards her, but she took a step back. Her eyes were glossy when she met his gaze, “How long?”

“That depends.. on how the mission goes.”

“Where are you going?”

“Karanese.”

“Karanese?” she repeated in shock.

He nodded, “We’ll be leaving Wall Rose through there.”

Her brows drew together. She opened her mouth to ask ‘why’ but froze; she was so used to not asking him about his scout duties-due to his ‘rules’-that it felt almost improper to.

He must’ve seen the question in her eyes because he went on to explain, “Erwin has plans for the lands there. He thinks that land can potentially benefit us in restoring Wall Maria someday.”

Her eyes widened, “Restoring Wall Maria—Is that even possible?”

He hesitated, “Not really,” he muttered, “But Erwin’s always thinking ahead.”

She went silent at that. Her mind racing a mile per minute. She could only imagine that the reason why they weren’t attempting to utilize the land outside of Trost anymore was because it was too infested with Titans. There were rumors that the thuds of Titans’ bumping into the walls outside of Trost were more audible than before.

She shivered at the thought only to tense when she realized Levi was going into titan territory regardless.. He was going to leave Wall Rose through Karanese. He was at risk no matter what.

She swallowed. She suddenly didn’t know.. she didn’t know how she let him go to missions before…

She was drawn from her thoughts when she felt Levi reach into her cloak to grab ahold of her hand again.

“Let’s go home” his monotone voice quieter than usual.

The second they got through the apartment door he kissed her. He kissed her with all the strength he had. He couldn’t stop. He didn’t want the feeling she gave him to ever end.

He kissed her as if he were trying to make up for all the kisses he wouldn’t be able to give her when he was away. He kissed her as if he wanted to convey how much he cared for her through his lips. He kissed her like he’d never get the chance to again.

Because he knew that’s how it would feel. Now that he had a taste of her lips, it was impossible-impossible-that leaving for expeditions would be the same. It was different to think of her laugh, her smile, her gestures in bits and pieces throughout the days he was away. And to replay their conversations in his mind in the darkness of the night when he couldn’t sleep. Sometimes he’d dwell too hard on the moments they shared subtle touches-reminiscing in the lingering feeling her touch ignited-and his body would get carried away…

It was pathetic, he knew it was. He was pathetic when it came to her. He was a version of himself that he never thought he could be.

She meant too much to him. She brought him peace to a degree he knew he didn’t deserve. He wondered how he’d gotten lucky enough to have her return his affection. He often wondered how he got her in the first place.

She brought warmth to his cold, hardened life. The kind of warmth he never wanted to lose. She filled the dark, empty spaces of his mind with something brighter.

He didn’t think that was possible, not after seeing all the things he saw. He’d accepted that no matter where he went, loss and death would follow. It seemed those kinds of things were intertwined with his fate, so he chose not to partake in fickle things like close relationships. They only resulted in someone getting hurt anyway.

It was a rule he chose to live by after he realized he always seemed to outlast everyone; everyone he cared about–his family, his friends, his comrades. It seemed to be a special talent he had. A special talent he was tired as hell of but decided to utilize in honor of those he saw die selflessly before him.

Somewhere along the way, he’d begun truly to care about his comrades. That begrudging respect turned into perseverance. The kind of perseverance that made him think he could see a glimpse of the vision Erwin saw for humanity-even if Erwin’s reasons were ambiguous. Eitherway, he told himself that was enough.

He told himself he’d dedicate his strength to the Scouts vision until death welcomed him in its cold, ruthless arms.

Until he met her.

She pulled apart his tightly knit ideals at the seams. She broke all the rules he’d kept in place to protect himself and she didn’t even have to try. The more he spoke to her the more intrigued he became. He denied his interest to himself more times than he could count.

Refusing to read her file when it sat at the corner of his desk because he didn’t care. Only to realize his denial was futile when he saw her broken, battered body on the Infirmary bed after Carter’s work. It was then that he realized he cared. He cared too much.

It was then that he realized there was someone he couldn’t let death steal from him.

The feeling was overwhelming, dangerous and selfish. It made him realize his ideals weren’t nearly as firm as he wanted them to be. Not even close.

His armor was weak when it came to her. He wanted things he shouldn’t want when she was near. He craved the human connection he forbade himself from. He suddenly wanted to save humanity for different reasons-for a future that awaited more than death.

This realization was enough to send him reeling. It was a train of thought he couldn’t indulge. So he acted on his heart instead of his head, for once. He’d meant to force her hand into joining the Garrison or MP route—not have her sit pretty in his apartment.

It was twisted, really. She hated him and she had every right to. Even then, she was kind to him. Silently fixing up his wounds, leaving extra portions of food behind, never giving him an excuse to worry about the little things. Sometimes he wished she’d be meaner to him, maybe that would dampen his feelings but she never gave him the chance.

He never dared to believe he’d get to call her his. In fact, because fate had brought her so close to him he was even more wary of acknowledging his feelings. He refused to unveil his selfish wish to her when he’d already been selfish enough. She deserved better than that.

He kept his desires to himself–convincing himself that he was only sticking around because she wanted him to–until he saw her fellow cadet mate die in his arms. Corinna, was her name. Her slight stature was all too familiar. Her background a little too close to home. It was the look on her face that jarred him the most. That glassy, pain filled sheen in her eyes that revealed just how much she didn’t want to die. He almost hated himself for letting her get assigned to his squad just because he needed the numbers.

But, for some goddamn reason, all he could think about was Devon. He knew his mind was playing tricks on him because she was the first from Devon’s training corps assigned to his squad. It was a fact that his mind seemed to cling onto because he remembered her as the roommate Devon once complained about for snoring too loud. It was a nonsensical fact that somehow drove him to think of how this girl, dying in his arms, could’ve easily been Devon.

This girl, who had trained the same amount as her, shared the same room as her and chose the same career path as her, reminded him of the fate Devon could’ve shared. The thought scared him to the bone.

It was the type of dread that rendered him frozen–and he never froze on the field. He was transfixed by the deep rooted throb in his chest that spread to every muscle in his body. He’d clung onto her limp frame with all his strength, unable to pry his eyes off of her until he heard someone call for him-reminding him where he was.

He felt guilty afterwards, for considering Corinna’s death an affirmation of sorts. An affirmation that denying Devon entry to the scout regiment was the right decision. He knew it was his selfishness talking but it was all he was grateful for. He was grateful that he’d never have to see Devon injured like that again. He was grateful that he knew where she was. He was grateful that he got to see her live.

The second he made it to town after that expedition he knew he had to see her. He didn’t even bother explaining himself to Erwin, simply dismounting his horse and using his ODM gear to get home as fast as possible.

At first he headed towards the direction of her workplace only to backtrack when he spotted her in an alleyway. He followed her home from above.

He thought seeing her up-close would lighten his need but he was proven wrong-drastically so. When she entered the apartment and rushed to him, he knew he was done for. The second she was close, his lips met hers. And there was no coming back—no coming back from the life she seeped into him.

If this was a part of living, he didn’t mind.

But he did mind how her body shook slightly against his now. How her hands on his chest trembled as she kissed him back. The taste of her salty tears at the corner of her lips. He hated that he had to put her through this. His selfishness had got them here.

She broke the kiss, burying her face in his neck.

“Don’t kiss me like that,” her low voice muffled by his shirt, “This isn’t goodbye. I still have two days.”

He closed his eyes, “Sorry.” he murmured.

He felt her hands fist his shirt, “You’ll come to see me during then, won’t you?” The question sounded all too uncertain on her lips.

His hand running down her back went still-he turned his face towards her, “What the hell do you think.” Despite his words, his voice was soft.

She let out a stifled laugh, “Shut up.”

They decided to proceed as normal, that’s what he wanted anyway. He had asked her if there was anywhere she wanted to go with him before he left and she couldn’t respond. How could she tell him all she wanted was him to stay?

Instead, she reversed the question on him. His answer was simple, spoken after a moment’s pause in his typical flat tone—Anywhere you are is fine by me.

His response had made her want to cry.

Everything made her want to cry. He left many times before and was bound to leave again, she’d accepted that but… this time felt worse—much, much worse. The second he'd told her it felt like a weight had dropped in her stomach, and the weight was only getting heavier with each passing second.

She didn’t want to be sad in front of him. She genuinely wanted him to enjoy their remaining time together, but.. it was hard. It was hard when all she could think about was how she was going to have the apartment to herself again. It was hard because she didn’t know when he’d be back—she didn’t even know if he’d make it back.

She blinked, refocusing on the task before her. She looked to see that her hand holding the knife was shaking. Her brows furrowed as she attempted to work past the shakes by tightening her grip around the knife, only to realize that made it worse.

She inhaled unevenly before clasping her free hand around her trembling wrist—steadying herself.

She resumed cutting the carrot.

Suddenly a tear drop hit the cutting board—making her freeze. She blinked-another tear falling from her eyelashes. She stared as the tear drops seeped into the cutting board, creating small dark circles in the wood.

She wanted to push it away—ignore the emotions she was feeling. She wanted to ignore the way her body felt like it was being squeezed at the center, suctioned inside out. She wanted to ignore the way her ribs ached, as if holding together the weight of her core was too much.

More tears silently slipped down her face, and she didn’t realize until a hand swiftly removed the knife from her hands and set it down on the cutting board.

She belatedly hid her shaky hands behind herself.

“S-sorry.” she muttered, not looking at him.

“Devon.”

She turned away from him, pretending to rearrange the other ingredients on the counter while discreetly wiping her tears with her shoulder.

“Devon.” he repeated.

She picked up a few vegetables she hadn’t cut up yet, “Yes?”

“You don’t have to cook.”

She didn’t look at him when she moved past him, back to the cutting board, “What are you talking about? I have to make dinner.”

“No, you don’t.”

She laid out the other vegetables on the cutting board, “Yes, I do.”

Just as she reached for the knife, he grabbed her wrist—forcing her to meet his gaze.

“No the hell you don’t.” he grit out, “You can’t even hold a goddamn knife straight.”

Her eyes widened before her eyes immediately watered. She wrenched her hand out of his grasp and turned her back to him.

“Wait-“ his voice was low, somewhat frustrated-in a way that seemed to be directed at himself, “That’s not what I meant. I-I’m sorry.”

“No,” her voice cracked, “You’re right. I-I can’t—“

She closed her eyes, forcing her tears back. She felt like there was a block in her throat, making it very hard for her to talk.

She hung her head, squeezing her eyelids shut tighter, “I don’t know what to do, Levi.” she whispered.

The second his hands made contact with her sides, she covered her face with her hands—the dam of tears breaking loose. His chest against her back the only thing keeping her upright as he wound his arms around her.

He dug his face into her neck, his arms around her waist so firm she would’ve stopped breathing if she wasn’t sobbing. He held her tightly against himself, as if inadvertently trying to dispel the weight within her ribs as she cried.

She wished she was stronger, so she wouldn’t have to do this to him. So she could support him the way she wanted to-because she truly did-but it hurt. She couldn’t seem to find it in herself to stop crying. The tears felt endless.

She’d gotten too spoiled. She was too used to his touch, to his voice, his presence. She didn’t want to go a day without it,  without him.

“I’m sorry, Devon.” his low voice was muffled by her hair. But it wasn’t monotonous enough for her to miss the undercurrent of self-hatred embedded in his tone.

She breathed in raggedly-trying to think past the tears. She wanted to tell him he didn’t need to apologize—that she didn’t want him to apologize. But her voice came out too small—

“Levi-“

His arms around her tightened more somehow, completely drawing her frame into his—as if trying to merge her body into his own. The strength in his arms made her gasp slightly; she felt the muscles in his arms contract as he didn’t let go.

“I’m sorry.” he whispered once again, feeling sick.

He’d known there was a possibility of this-of leaving being much harder if their relationship were to change. It was one of the many reasons why he convinced himself keeping his feelings to himself was the best course of action, and yet here they were. His selfishness had brought them here.

He had told her he never wanted to be the reason she was hurting and yet, that’s all he seemed to do.

He’d never seen her cry. She didn’t even cry when recounting the atrocities of her past. But somehow, here she was, crying over him.

He wasn’t worth it.

She shifted in the tight-hold of his arms, turning slightly towards him. Her fingers slipped into his hair, gently drawing his face out of the warmth of her neck. Her strawberry scent lingering in the air between them.

Her hand slid down to cup the side of his face, her red-rimmed eyes searching his face. Her face shone in places where her tears had trailed down seconds ago. Her gaze was so gentle, he thought he might shatter.

“You’re gonna come back.” she affirmed, so quietly that he wouldn’t have heard if he hadn’t been so close.

He would—even if he died trying.

“I’ll be waiting,” her voice wavered, “Don’t make my patience go to waste.”

He was quiet for a moment, simply staring at her.

What did I do to earn her?

“C-come back to me first thing.. just like last time.” she continued lowly.

He forced himself to focus on her words, instead of the overwhelming need he felt to kiss her. He knew once he started, it’d be hard for him to stop.

“Just like last time,” he muttered, “ODM gear and all?”

He watched a small smile bloom across her lips, her eyes gazing off elsewhere-as if replaying the memory. The spark that lit her eyes made his insides swarm with warmth. The desire to kiss her seared through him at a thousandfold.

Before he could act, she dropped her hand from his face—looking away to hide her blush.

“I wouldn’t mind..” she murmured. He had looked really good in ODM gear after all.

“Yeah?” His brows furrowed, “What’s that tone.”

“Nothing.” she answered, a little too quickly.

“Then why can’t you look at me.”

She pulled at his arms around her, “Because I need to go—“

He only held her tighter, “You don’t need to go anywhere.”

She laughed lightly as he nuzzled his face into her neck again, “Levi!” she wriggled in his hold, her smile widening. “Let me go.”

His words were muffled by her hair, “Not happening-not til you explain yourself.”

“Explain what.”

“I wouldn’t mind.” he repeated her words-in an overtly suggestive tone that she didn’t use.

“I didn’t say it like that!” she shot back, blazing red.

She bit her lower lip, trying to think past his nose trailing her jaw.

“Fine, but you were thinking something.”

She had to distract him-she wasn't ready to admit that she liked seeing him in uniform just yet.

“I-I was.” she admitted, instantly blushing when she felt him go still beside her.

She pushed at his arms, “But I’ll only tell you after we grab some food. I’m hungry.”

He seemed to hesitate before finally letting his arms drop from around her. She quickly stepped away from him.

He already missed her warmth but he kept his desire to himself as he watched her take off her apron. He didn’t miss the soft blush decorating her cheeks.

“I’ll hold you to that.”

She never told him.

He glanced down at her head resting on his lap. Her dark hair splayed out on his thighs. She had fallen asleep on him. 

She had eaten well-heartily, as she always does. She'd picked out the food spot as well so she'd been rather excited about it. She was able to name every ingredient within the stew simply from one spoonful. He mocked her for it but he adored every single second.

They had decided to walk around a bit after, only arriving home half an hour ago. They settled into the couch for the night, intending to read together as they sometimes did-but it seemed she had other plans.

He lowered the book in his hand, only to move his free hand over her head. He wanted to brush away a few strands of her hair that’d fallen over her face but suddenly went still. His fingertips hovering over her forehead.

He didn’t want to wake her.

His silver eyes raked over her features once more. She looked so at peace.. he’d never seen her asleep up-close like this.

He didn’t even remember how she got here. She’d been reading with her back pressed to his arm at first. Then her head leaning against his shoulder, legs half-way bent over his. Then it seemed her head had made its way down to his lap, her head resting on his thigh as she read with her book propped against her bent legs.

Now, she was asleep.

He placed his book down silently. His fingers over her forehead lowering ever so slightly-giving into his instinct to touch her. He brushed away the strands with his fingertips before gently settling his hand into her hair.

She was so pretty he didn’t know how he thought he could ignore her after first laying his eyes on her.

He slowly ran his fingers through her hair, wondering how he was going to go on without seeing her. He looked forward to her more than she knew. She’d become the light of his days.

It scared him sometimes-how much he cared for her. He hadn’t felt this strongly about anything in years. In fact, he hardly felt anything at all–emotionally anyway.

Of course, he cared about his tasks as Captain. He never took the job lightly-it was impossible to. But-aside from his daily rituals-he rarely did much in his personal life. He enjoyed his alone time but this… this was different. This was something he knew he was going to ache for when he was away.

She stirred, her neck arching slightly-leaning into his hand before laying still. A soft, content sigh leaving her lips.

He immediately went still before smiling subtly in realization.

You like that?

He slipped his fingers through her hair once-more, letting his fingertips glide through more strands than before. He wasn’t surprised now that he thought about it. He always liked it whenever she touched his hair..

His mind wandered to a memory of her hands at his nape, their lips locked-on this very couch.

“I’m gonna head to bed.” she spoke through a yawn.

He glanced over to watch her stand up from the couch. She stretched out her arms before reaching towards the coffee table to grab her empty mug. Just as she bent over, he dropped his pen onto his open notebook and reached for her–tugging her back down.

She gasped as she fell back onto the couch, beside him. A look of obvious frustration on her features as she opened her mouth to complain but suddenly froze when she met his gaze. Her mouth gradually closed the longer she looked at him–a bright flush spreading across her cheeks.

He couldn’t ignore the rush of electricity skimming up his spine. He liked that she knew what he wanted.

He leaned towards her, gently pressing his lips to hers. That familiar warm sensation sweeping underneath his skin as they shared a few soft pecks. Each peck followed by another because he couldn’t ever get enough. He held her lips a little longer–tilting his head so he could kiss her more.

Just as he caught himself leaning further into her-he stopped, gently withdrawing his lips from hers. He had a bad habit of getting carried away easily; a habit that he was trying to tame-for her sake. But one look at her made him realize he wasn’t the only one breathless.

Her face was more flushed than before, her lips slightly parted. He couldn’t help but notice the subtle rise and fall of her collarbones against her skin as she tried to catch her breath. His eyes flickered back to hers and suddenly any resolve to hold back slipped away.

His hand found the back of her thigh, easily yanking her towards him. Her hands instinctively went to his shoulders to balance herself. Just as she let out a little sound of surprise-he caught her lips, kissing her with a bruising need. His skin buzzed with satisfaction when he felt her hands slip up his nape, her fingertips in his hair. The kiss only growing more intense when her hold tightened—

He was pulled from his thoughts when she stirred on his thigh once-more. She turned her back to him, changing her position in her sleep.

He glanced down, only to freeze. Fuck.

There-at his groin-stood out a pointed tent. It throbbed uncomfortably–his cock pressing against his pants at a rather bad angle.

He wanted to readjust himself but she was right there. It felt wrong to even be hard with her like this.

He tensed, inadvertently flexing his thighs. She stirred once more, her eyes fluttering open slightly at the sensation. She reached over to fluff her pillow only to grasp something hard.

Her eyes shot open, turning to see that her hand was over Levi’s knee. She glanced around before realizing she was in the living room. She swiftly turned over to see Levi staring down at her, flushed.

She blinked slowly, still a bit groggy. Am I dreaming?

“You awake.” he spoke, his voice somewhat taut.

Her eyes widened when she realized this was very much real.

“Shit.” she propped herself up on her elbows, her book sliding off her stomach and hitting the floor in the process. Suddenly everything came back to her.

“I fell asleep.” she murmured.

“Y-yeah.”

Her brows furrowed before slightly turning to her side, facing him. His silver eyes met hers and his jaw imperceptibly clenched. Something about the way she looked up at him was indescribably attractive.

Can she stop looking pretty for one goddamn second?

She tilted her head, unable to decipher his expression, “You.. didn’t wake me up?”

“Why would I.”

She searched his face, “Aren’t you tired?”

He paused before shaking his head.

“I’m gonna make you tea-“ Just as she rose to do exactly that, his hand clasped around her shoulder.

“No. Just go to bed. It’s late.”

She frowned subtly, “But I want you to sleep too.”

His hand slipped over the side of her face, a touch of softness in his eyes, “I will,” he muttered, attempting to reassure her despite his flat tone, “I just need some time.”

She was quiet for a moment, assessing him somewhat haphazardly-since she was still sleepy-before cupping his hand over her face.

“Okay.” she murmured before slowly sitting up.

He watched her stand, his eyes never leaving her slim frame as she wandered back to her room.

Once the door closed behind her, he let out a sigh. Partly out of relief-because she hadn’t noticed his hard on-but mainly because he’d have to wait to see her again. And in two days, the wait would be much longer..

Devon entered her bedroom, holding the towel around herself with one arm. She stood in front of the vanity, searching for her hairbrush.

Once she found the brush, she raised it to her hair-only to freeze when she caught sight of herself in the mirror. Her damp brown hair went down past her breasts, it’d grown out longer than she intended. Her eyes lingered on her shoulders and collarbones. An imperceptible frown gracing her lips when she noticed they seemed to protrude a bit more.

Her gaze flickered upto her eyes and swallowed. Her eyes were puffy, vacant and.. sad. Her body always always reflected her mood—she wished it didn’t. She didn’t need to be reminded how easily her emotions affected her physicality.

She hated how her health had declined ever since two days ago—ever since he’d told her he was leaving. It was all she could think about, obsessively so. It made her heart ache and chest tighten everytime she thought about it. So-in order to combat this-she forced herself to keep her mind occupied.

The day before, she extended her work shift at the bookstore. She worked so assiduously that she forgot to take a break and missed eating the lunch she packed. Even Larsa had asked if she was okay after noticing that she had done triple the amount of her typical workload in one shift.

She’d been so tired when she got home, she fell asleep right on the couch. When she awoke the following morning on her bed, a pang of guilt resounded through her. Levi must’ve come home when she was asleep. She’d been too tired to give him any attention, wasting away the already dwindling time they had together.

Now, today was their last day together. She didn’t get to see him in the morning because she woke up late-despite telling herself that she would get up early just to send him off to work. But, she was barely able to send herself off to work because she woke up ten minutes before her shift started. She’d nearly flung out of the apartment, forgetting to eat breakfast or pack lunch.

By the time she got home after work and culinary class, she’d wanted to nap but refused. She didn’t want to miss seeing Levi in case he came home early. Instead, she threw herself into meal prepping for the week. Still not eating a single meal herself-simply because she ‘wasn’t hungry'. Just as she wrapped up and decided to shower, Levi came home.

He greeted her with a deep, spine-tingling kiss that left her lips bruised and body shivering. After she recovered her breath, she told him that she’d join him after she showered.

She sighed as she ran the brush through her hair, trying not to dwell too long on how she looked despite staring at herself in the vanity mirror. She was glad Levi hadn’t noticed—or at least hadn’t commented on it. She wasn’t sure if she could handle it.

She set down the brush before moving all of her hair over one shoulder. She began to braid it, only to freeze when she saw the bedroom door close in the mirror. The sound of the door’s locking mechanism echoed.

She swiveled around to see Levi standing beside the door, his steel-gray eyes dark as he met her gaze. His expression closed.

Her heart stopped. He never came into her room at night. He was supposed to be waiting for her in the living room.. Her eyes widened in realization. I left my room door open.

It was the only plausible answer-she would’ve heard him enter if the door had been closed previously.

If I leave my room door open.. at night.. that means I’m ready.

Her raspily spoken promise echoed within her mind. She suddenly forgot how to breathe.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion—his hand slipped away from the doorknob and he began to walk up to her. Her throat grew tight with each step he took.

Each step was deliberate, purposefully slow. His narrow, gray eyes never leaving hers. He didn’t stop until he stood directly before her.

He stood close enough that his familiar clean yet musky, cedarwood and eucalyptus scent wafted over her—but instead of eliciting the sense of comfort it typically derived within her, his scent awoke something different altogether. She felt hypnotized. She couldn’t look away from him.

Her hand holding her towel to her chest tightened ever so slightly. His steely eyes dropped to her chest, immediately noting the slight action.

She couldn’t find it in herself to speak.

Her breath caught when she suddenly felt his hand slide around her nape, his fingers sifting gently through her damp hair. He carefully dragged his fingers down the length of her hair, she belatedly realized that he was undoing her roughly done braid.

His dress-shirt clad arm grazed her bare arm as he pulled apart her braid with a swift yet precise downward stroke of his fingers. The sensation made her shiver.

Their faces were so close, she couldn’t look him in the eye. She was afraid to move.

She felt his eyes on her when he pressed the flat of his palm to her lower back, drawing her closer. Their bodies were so near—only an infinitesimal amount of space between them. Her cheek brushed against his jaw, causing heat to scatter from where they made contact.

She resisted the urge to shiver when he dragged his palm up her spine, over her towel—his hand stopped at the center of shoulder blades, resting over the towel's edge.

She felt the weight of his gaze on her as his jaw skimmed her once more, his nose grazing her cheekbone—an indescribable magnetism keeping the air charged between them. She felt an odd urge to hold her breath.

Then suddenly, his finger hooked into her towel and with one swift motion the towel loosened and fell into a heap at her ankles. She gasped, instinctively stepping back.

She stood completely bare before him. Her heart ricocheting within her body as she realized—this was the first time she was fully naked in front of someone. She felt vulnerable—exposed.

But his eyes didn’t make her feel that way.

She didn’t need to look at him to feel the weight of his gaze on her body—but she couldn’t help it. She watched his eyes take in her figure, starting at her pronounced collarbones to her chest then her stomach, hips and legs. She felt her body go warm wherever he stared. His eyes were so sharp-so attentive-his gaze would’ve felt calculative if his eyes didn’t flutter and a faint blush didn't appear on his cheeks. His half-lidded eyes were the epitome of lust, the silver in his eyes murky and wanting.

Her stomach tightened, as if trying to dispel the bundle of nerves in her gut. Despite how exposed she felt, his eyes made her feel like she was the rarest treasure. He looked at her as if she was the most valuable thing in the world.

But the adoration peeking through the lust switched to something else within seconds-switched to something much, much darker. It felt as if the weight of his gaze had become twice as heavy, making goosebumps break across her skin and her nipples harden. The air around her seemed to close in on her as she realized-with daunting clarity-what that look was—possession.

She felt a bolt of electricity lick up her spine when he took a step towards her. Just as his fingertips scraped her hip, she grasped his forearm.

“W-wait,” she managed to choke out in a low whisper.

She faced him, her eyes searching his face. She didn’t realize she was almost checking to see if there was a flicker of impatience or annoyance—but there was none. His gaze was weighted, burning with something so intense it was hard to look at for too long. His jaw was locked.

She forced herself to uphold his gaze, “I.. I want to undress you too.”

His eyes seemed to widen imperceptibly before his forearm dropped from her hand to his side. Her eyes flickered up to his-a bit unsure. She wondered if this was resignation or forbearance on his part. She should’ve known it was the latter.

She reached the collar of his shirt, trying her best not to tremble too hard when she undid each button. It was hard to focus with him so close—his impenetrable eyes and bated breath too near.

Her hands grew unsteady at the last button, right above his groin. She shivered when she felt his breath waver beside her ear. The heat of his breath scattered down her neck—making her skin warm up when she realized just how heedy he was of her touch.

She quickly undid the button best she could. When he saw her reach towards his shoulders to pull down his sleeves, he was eager to help her. Easily shifting out of the shirt and letting it fall to the floor.

Her eyes ran down his shirtless frame. She’d seen him shirtless before but this was different. She never got to openly admire him—not like this. His narrow, tautly wired build was still rigid with muscle, not an ounce of softness to him. Scars marked various parts of his skin-some more faint than others. Her eyes dropped to one of the more prominent pigmented scars, the one along his navel. She remembered patching that one up months ago.

She placed her slightly trembling hand at his sternum, her fingertips grazing his firm pecs as she moved her hand along his chest. She felt him subtly jolt at the action-as if he hadn’t expected her to touch him.

She glanced over to see him facing down-his black hair covering his eyes. She didn’t miss the outline of his clenched jaw or the subtle swipe of color creeping along his cheeks.

She wanted to touch him, so she did. She moved her hand delicately along his skin-not wanting to startle him. She felt oddly at comfort touching him, as if she were exploring more of him. Some of his scars were flat, while others seemed to protrude slightly against her palm.

His biceps were strong and hard, just from one skim of her fingers she didn’t doubt the strength within them. Prominent green veins ran down his pale arms; she touched a trail of one down to his elbow.

His whole body was tense-she knew it was. From the set of his shoulders to the tension she felt brewing under skin. He wasn’t used to being touched. She didn’t dare allow herself to believe she was the first.

Her hand trailed from his elbow to his core; to the tightly compact skin of abs, where he was the most tense. His skin was more pale here, it almost felt more delicate. But she wasn’t a fool, there was no gentleness in the hard muscles of his abdomen. This was a soldier’s body. A man who’s seen and done too much. The only man she wanted.

She could feel the tension coiled in his skin the lower she drew her shaky hand. Her fingers slowly ran down the center line of his abs—moving tantalizingly slow when she brushed past his belly button.

Suddenly her hand stopped, hovering right over his navel when she realized just how much restraint he was practicing.

She’d been ignoring it, but the silent hum of pressure against his skin was nearly palpable. Her breath came out staggered as she felt the weight of the air around her. The closed urgency—his need.

She felt like she was touching a ticking time bomb.

She heard him let out a low, strained breath. Her eyes dropping to the waistline of his pants when she saw his deep v-lines protrude more, and the veins along his lower navel become more prominent.

She gasped when she was suddenly flung onto the bed by forceful hands on her hips. All the restraint thrumming under his skin was nowhere to be seen by the way he grabbed her legs and pulled her thighs apart to stand between them.

She jolted, reaching out to slip her hands over his shoulders to his nape—drawing his face close. She looked up at him, her eyes searching his face wildly as she whispered-hurriedly.

“Please, b-be gentle with me.”

His silver eyes transformed from wanting to molten. Ends of his pitch black hair scraped her forehead as he gave her face a slow once-over.

Her heartbeat sky-rocketed at how handsome he looked over her. Even this close, she couldn’t find one imperfection in his face.

He released her hips and pressed his hands to the bed beside her head—enclosing her in his arms. He kissed her so hard, she wanted to sob. His passion was incontestable, she wanted to drown in it.

His mouth moved against hers in that familiar way, making her body light up to a different degree— making her skin burn for something more. Her hands pulled at his hair, urging him closer.

She cried out when he palmed her breast, needily—the sensation all too new. His lips were still relentless, desperate on hers. She gasped against his lips when he squeezed her breasts harder. His hips bucked into hers-his clothed groin pressing against her warmth.

He broke the kiss and ran his sharp eyes over her face and body-as if trying to memorize her. His grey eyes burned with black fire as he slipped his arm around lower back, hoisting her further up the bed.

She watched him stand from the bed. He unbuckled his belt, tossing it to the floor as he undressed himself til he was bare. She subconsciously closed her legs as she stared at his fully erect cock hanging between his legs. It’s leaking tip touched his navel as he bent over slightly to remove his pants. It was thick, veins running along its sides as it protruded outwards—seeking attention.

She flushed brightly when he met her eyes. He grabbed his cock, giving it a firm stroke before wiping away the white substance at its head.

He climbed over the bed, making his way over her. He kept an arm propped beside her head while gently sliding his other hand along her inner thigh to spread her legs open.

She complied, her heart racing as she felt his firm thighs against the back of hers—holding her legs wide open.

She shivered when she felt his lips scrape the outside of her ear. Her hands went to his biceps, her eyes searching his face.

His silver eyes instantly met hers and he must’ve seen something because he leaned over and pressed a delicate kiss to her lips.

His hand underneath her knee pulled her up slightly as he kissed her. Her cunt grazed the tip of his cock and he hissed. She gasped at the sensation it elicited.

Her hands slid up his biceps to his shoulders, gripping tightly.

“Levi-“ she rasped out.

His arm beside her head moved closer, his hand slipping into her hair—pressing into the side of her face. His thumb ran along cheek.

“S’okay,” his deep voice rumbled.

He pressed his forehead to hers, “I’ll-I’ll be slow,” he stuttered out, “Tell me—tell me when to stop.”

She stared up into his eyes. His eyes glimmered-like the of rough surfaces of obsidian-in the dark. To others he might've been inscrutable, but his eyes felt like home to her. She realized-with a low sweeping sensation in her stomach-that she trusted him. She trusted him with her all.

Her hands slid around either side of his neck as she nodded.

He didn’t remove his eyes from her when he let go of her thigh to grip his cock and angle it so that his tip rested at her entrance. She jolted at the shot of heat that ignited from her core.

His sharp eyes turned black before he closed his eyes. He inhaled raggedly before locking his jaw. She felt his shoulders flex with restraint as he slowly pressed his hips into her.

She let out a small cry, her back arching slowly at the unfamiliarity of the sensation. His cock was warm-and hard, so hard-as it pushed into her. She felt her legs tremble slightly around him.

He went still. His hand at the side of her face slipped to the crown of her head, gripping a handful of her hair in a fist as he breathed out a haggard breath.

“How’s that.” his voice was taut.

Her eyes flitted over his tense expression before nodding. Her hands at his neck twitched nervously.

She closed her eyes when she felt his hips shift again—trying to prepare herself. She felt his cock disappear from within her only to force itself back in deeper.

“Ah!” she cried out, tears biting the corner of her eyes as her breath came out staggered. That hurt.

“Shit, sorry-“ he gritted out. He shook his head before scanning her face worriedly.

He kissed a tear that seemed to escape from the corner of her eye, “I’ll be slower.” he murmured-voice strained.

She closed her eyes when he glanced down between them. She wasn’t the only one trembling, she felt the slight tremors of tension knotting and unknotting under his skin. She knew he was trying to be as patient as he could with her, she wanted to do this for him.

She bit her lower lip, trying not to cry out when she felt his cock slowly press deeper into her. It felt as if he were pushing through something he shouldn’t—as if he were trying to make room somewhere that was too tight but he kept insisting—making room for himself in her.

She gasped-unable to take the pain and the low flickering sensation of heat building up in her insides, making her wetter. She felt filled enough but he still seemed have more-how, oh lord, how—

Her eyes shot open, “Wait-wait-“

He went still, exhaling breathlessly as he stared down at her.

Her eyes fluttered as she wriggled her hips upwards slightly-thinking it might alleviate the pain. The sensation of having something within her all too foreign. She felt his cock slide against her walls.

He hissed, “Don’t do that.”

She felt his thighs and shoulders flex. Imperceptible waves of self-restraint rolling off of him.

She gasped slightly when she felt his cock throb within her—her insides instinctively clamped around him.

His breath seemed to disappear and suddenly his cock was gone from within her. Her eyes opened wide to see that his expression was hard.

“Do you want me to be gentle.”

She nodded, unable to tear her eyes away from his deep silver ones.

He pressed his forehead to hers, his hand fisting the hair at the crown of her head. “Then don’t make this hard for me.” he spoke raggedly.

She held onto his neck tighter-her eyes flitting between each of his as her thumbs stroked ahis defined jaw.

“S-“ his lips cut her off before she could finish her apology. The kiss was fierce, hungry, unrestrained—suddenly he plunged his cock into her at the same depth as before.

She whimpered under his lips. The pain made her fingers curl into his skin—her nails making crescent shaped marks in his back.

He broke the kiss, staring down at her intently as he withdrew his hips slightly-not fully removing his cock from within her.

His expression was strained, “This is gonna hurt.”

Her eyes widened before she completely wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to hide her face in his shoulder. Her hands shook subtly in his hair as her knees drew her legs closer around his hips-inadvertently pushing his cock slightly deeper. His jaw clenched.

“Okay.” she rasped out, only to lose any sense of coherent thought a second later.

He drove the full length of his cock inside in her one detrimental sweep. She screamed-unprepared despite the warning. She threw her head back, back arching against the bed as her tits pressed into his firm chest. His body a rigid weight against her trembling, writhing form—keeping her pinned under him.

Her insides clung to him—squeezing him unbearably tight. A deep moan escaped his lips, traveling down the cusp of her ear to every nerve in her body.

His hand at the crown of her head fisted her hair. His other hand simultaneously sliding around her arched her back, slipping over her ass to further press himself into her cunt. She gasped out, wincing.

Her arms shook around him as she hugged him tightly, her wrapped legs around his back keeping him close. Her breath was weak and uneven as she tried to think past the pain—wanting to give him her all.

She lifted her hips slightly—her cunt tightening further around his cock at the action. His cock made her feel so full. She never thought she could feel like this. Underneath the aftershocks of pain, there was this indiscernible sensation that sparked deep below her abdomen-making her skin tingle and breath hot. It felt like something was suspended inside of her, waiting to come apart.

His hips bucked into her, and a staggered cry left her lips. She felt her insides reflexively squeeze around him and before she knew it, another low, guttural moan was ripped from his throat and she felt his cock twitch in her depths.

Suddenly he straightened, easily unraveling himself from her wrapped arms to pull back his hips. He pulled his cock out a second before spurts of his cum began to pour from his tip. She stared-stunned-as his cock twitched, continuing to spurt out thick, white liquid over her stomach until his cock went still.

Her eyes flickered up to see that his face was flushed, almost glowing in a way she’d never seen before. She stared, watching his sweaty body gleam as he breathed coarsely, his abs hardening with each inhale. The strands of his dark hair that weren’t pasted to his forehead swayed as he looked down at her.

She swallowed, her heart scrambling into different directions at his gaze. She couldn’t describe the pull she always felt with him—as if the atoms in the air were pulling them together, as if being skin to skin wasn’t enough.

She sharply turned her face away, drawing in the shaky breath his eyes had chased away. She could relax now, he had finished. The feeling of his warm cum on her stomach was proof.

She jolted slightly when she felt him bend over her once-more. His silver eyes unreadable as he propped his arm beside her head again.

Her legs jolted sensitively when she felt him rub the tip of his cock against her inner thigh-wiping away the last bead of his cum, before driving the full-length of his cock deep into her cunt in one stroke.

She yelled out-her cunt convulsing around him from the pain. The underlying shocks of pleasure that scattered within her surprised her. Her hands went to his chest as she attempted to even out her breathing.

Her expression was strained as she looked up at him, “L-Levi, what are you doing?”

Both of his arms were propped beside her head now. One hand grasped the hair above her head in a loose fist, while the other pressed into the side of her face—his thumb grazing her panting lips.

His eyes were unrelenting in the dark, “I’m not done with you.”

A loud gasp left her lips when she felt him press his hips further into her.

She groaned, “Levi..” her hands spasmed across his chest before gripping his shoulders tightly.

He pressed his forehead against hers, his voice jagged, “How could I be? After everything you do to me..”

Her cunt squeezed around him and he hissed. His cock bucking into her, “Need t’give this cunt what it deserves.”

Before he could start, her hand went to his throat, “Wait-wait-I-I don’t know if I’m made for this.” she stuttered out, saying the first words that came to mind.

His dark, barely constrained eyes studied her. She felt his cock twitch inside of her and shivered.

“Then why do you feel like you’re made for me.”

His quiet words washed over her skin, making something churn in her gut. Her hands slid over his jaw and cupped his face, she leaned up to kiss him.

Then she was at his mercy.

He kissed her so hard she was crushed against the sheets. His cock pistoned in and out of her at a pace brutal enough to make her see stars.

The pain was immense, but the rising sensation she felt rising underneath her skin was indescribable. She’d never felt anything like it. It made her insides clamp desperately around his cock every time he slammed into her.

She broke the kiss, arching her neck back as her body trembled under his unforgiving pace. She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t think.

It felt inhumane, animalistic, and otherworldly. He fucked her in a way that didn't think humanly possible-so fast, deep and powerful. It was almost as if he were proving to her that no one else could make her feel like this-branding it within her insides.

His hunger poured through the strength of his merciless thrusts. Any restraint he’d kept before was long gone. His hand fisted her hair, keeping her neck arched as he bit at the sensitive skin underneath her jaw. His teeth marking as much of her as he desired—he didn’t slow down.

Tears streamed down the corners of her eyes as his pace picked up. She didn’t think that was possible-but his strength-she felt it thrumming boundlessly in his skin. She swore his cock had grown in size.

She couldn’t take it. Loud cries left her lips with each body bending fuck. Her arms aching from how tightly she held onto his shoulders. His breaths were short, hot and sharp and beside her throat. His cock throbbed within her.

Suddenly one harsh thrust touched her too deep—deep enough to make her shatter. Her head flung backwards. She didn’t know if she was moaning or screaming but she felt a pleasure so blinding her body buckled underneath his.

The lewd sounds of their sex and the headboard hitting the wall became white noise. Wave after wave of pleasure unfurled at every point of her body—consuming all of her. His relentless pace powering through her, letting the fire brewing within her peak to a devastating degree.

And her mind went blank.

“Have you ate at all today?”

She froze, her hand tightening over the sheets, “No.” she admitted.

She felt Levi’s razor-sharp eyes bore into the side of her head but she refused to meet his gaze. She knew the confession would upset him.

“That explains it.” Dr. Bernard spoke calmly before reaching into his bag and handing her a banana.

She hesitated a moment before taking it.

“Please, eat,” he urged, “It’s no wonder you went unconscious after that much strenuous activity.” Dr. Bernard shot Levi a disappointed look.

Levi didn’t meet his eyes. He wore a plain black tee since she currently wore the dress-shirt he’d been wearing earlier.

Dr. Bernard stood up, re-adjusting his glasses, “I suppose that concludes our time together. Please, miss, I implore you to not miss your meals. Food is our fuel.”

His eyes narrowed as he turned to Levi, “And I implore you to practice more restraint.”

A faint blush bloomed on Levi’s cheeks as his eyes hardened, but he-surprisingly-said nothing. Instead he straightened from his perch against the wall, letting his folded arms drop to his sides as he motioned towards the door.

“I’ll walk you out.” his tone clipped.

Dr. Bernard merely sighed. He turned to give Devon a nod in goodbye before walking out of the room. Just as Levi turned to follow him, he stopped in his tracks.

He glanced over his shoulder to see her struggling with peeling the banana, her wrists wobbling slightly.

He grit his teeth before hastily turning to her and snatching the banana from her hands. He deftly peeled its sides before handing it to her.

She stared up at him for a moment before taking it from him. She knew he’d be mad at her for skipping her meals but it still surprised her.

She waited for some scolding remark but none came—instead he was terse, “How do you feel.”

She’d awoken in the middle of Dr. Bernard examining her so it was only natural for him to want to know. But.. how could she answer that question?

She supposed Dr. Bernard was right in some aspect. She had been feeling a bit lightheaded throughout the day but the only reason why she’d passed out was because of him; that overwhelming sense of pleasure he elicited in her body.

Her throat went dry before her eyes flitted up to him.

“H-how did you do that?” her voice felt low and hoarse to her ears.

His thin brows furrowed, “What.”

Her legs inadvertently squeezed together under the sheets-his eyes followed the action.

She swallowed, “How did you make me feel like that?”

His eyes widened-black fire inflaming within his stare-before he was on her. He bent over her, one hand planted to the headboard while his other hand crept up her knee to her inner thigh, over the blanket.

She shivered, leaning back into the headboard as he cornered her.

His crystalline eyes never left hers, “How’d I make you feel.” his low voice made her heartbeat go off at an erratic rate.

Her throat tightened before losing all train of thought when his hand lightly squeezed her inner thigh. A short gasp leaving her lips as her body jolted. The sharp sense of pain that shot through her was distinct, making her cunt squeeze inwards reflexively. Her insides throbbed, clutching at broken pieces of bliss that she'd felt before.

She glanced down at her now open legs. Last she remembered, she'd mentally instructed herself to squeeze her legs together-to stop his wandering hand, not spread herself wider for him.

Suddenly Dr. Bernard called out from the living room, “Guess I’ll just walk myself out then!”

Levi suddenly wrenched himself away from her-as if having completely forgotten someone else was in the apartment. To be fair, she had too.

“I’ll be back.” he muttered before swiftly exiting the room, shutting the door behind himself.

Her eyes widened when she saw the rumpled pile of sheets stuffed behind the door—an obvious red stain on the old sheets. I bled.. that much? She stared at the stain, feeling a bit unnerved. She hadn't even realized that she bled in the first place.

She glanced down, just noticing that the sheets on the bed were were different than the ones used during their.. sex, he must’ve hastily replaced them before grabbing the Doctor.

She touched her lower belly, belatedly realizing that the cum that’d been there moments ago was gone as well. He was always so particular about his cleanliness… only to fuck like that. She couldn’t quite wrap her head around it.

She swallowed, a wave of exhaustion hitting her. She took a few bites from the banana before laying down.

She thought she distantly heard the familiar low intonation of Levi’s voice speaking to Dr. Bernard. She pulled the sheets up to her shoulders-willingly succumbing to the pull of sleep wafting over her. Her last fleeting thought being—when’s he going to come back?

Unfortunately, it would be a while.

Devon’s eyes widened before immediately going scarlet.

In truth, she had been thinking about Levi. More specifically the body-tingling kiss he’d given her during lunch. She was able to make it back to the apartment during his lunch hour today.

What was meant to be a chaste kiss at the door resulted in her back against the wall and his hands gripping her sides—all because she hadn’t broken the kiss first.

She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it.

The older woman sighed, “I remember those days.”

Devon offered her a gentle smile—feeling rather embarrassed. She knew she’d zoned out but to think that her face had given away her thoughts that easily..

Maybe Imada had a point in calling her clearer than glass.

The elderly woman returned her smile with a kind one of her own.

“Who is he?” she inquired, gently.

Devon hesitated at the question—suddenly questioning the state of their relationship.

What are we?

“He’s my fiancé..” she answered with a subtle frown.

The woman’s smile widened, “How’d you meet him?”

She fidgeted a bit, absentmindedly messing with the strap of her bag over shoulder.

“Ah—It’s a bit of a long story.” she said, feeling somewhat shy.

“Does it look like I have something better to do?”

Devon couldn’t help but laugh a bit at that.

She supposed it was true. The woman seemed to be waiting for the public traveling carriage-wagon like her. The carriage seemed to be taking longer than anticipated to arrive.

She bit at her lower lip. She supposed sharing the story couldn’t hurt. She kind of did want to talk about him with someone anyway…

“Oh wow! So what started out as a fake engagement turned into a real one!” the old woman exclaimed.

Devon smiled, “I suppose so.”

“How fortunate.” the woman responded with a warm smile.

“He played the long game, huh.” a dreary masculine voice piped up from behind them.

They both glanced over to see a trench coat clad, dirty blonde male in his early thirties leaning against the building behind them.

He caught Devon’s shocked expression.

He blew out a puff of smoke from his cigarette, “What—the guy’s probably had eyes for you the second he saw ya. Probably took you to his spot on purpose.”

Devon’s brows drew together.

“Didn’t you just say he told you he liked you since the training corps or some shit?”

She didn’t like that this random male suddenly knew the details of her relationship. She hadn’t seen him show up at the carriage stop.

She frowned, “Yes but..” It wasn’t planned.

..Right?

He let out a low chuckle, “You thought he messed up your career and took you to his place out of the kindness of his heart?”

At her blank expression he smiled smugly, “Naive girl.”

Before Devon could address her bubbling agitation the carriage arrived.

The man tossed his cigarette onto the ground, smothering it with his heel before walking past them to get into the carriage first.

“Good luck to ya.” he spoke while passing her.

She glared.

She suddenly felt a hand touch her elbow and immediately glanced over.

The elderly woman stood beside her, “Ignore him. Probably got his heart broken once and forgot things can unfold genuinely if you let em.”

Devon nodded expressionlessly before helping the woman get onto the carriage.

She tried to dismiss the strange man’s words from her mind but the seed had been planted. Uneasiness swirled within her gut and she couldn’t help but feel an undercurrent of doubt.

She stared out the carriage window, a subtle frown spreading along her lips.

She tried not to think about it. Tried.

She told herself she wasn’t going to let some bitter man’s words get to her but the more she tried not to think about it the more her brain wanted to.

Because it was possible. She couldn’t deny the possibility of what that bitter man said being true. Levi could’ve ruined her scout career to get her alone—it wouldn’t be the first time that had happened.

After all, when she was little she’d gotten kidnapped and sold by her ‘adoptive father’. It wouldn’t be the first time someone used her for their own means.

The possibility felt like a knife to her gut.

She took solace in the fact that Levi hadn’t necessarily tried to have all of her yet-but what if that was all a part of the ‘long game’ that bitter man spoke of. After all, her adoptive father had seemed like the nicest man alive before his true intentions became clear.

She entered the apartment and locked the door behind herself. She wandered into the living room, setting her bag of leftovers from culinary school onto the coffee table. It was some sort of specialty dish that nobles supposedly enjoyed. She’d made it perfectly despite not liking the taste herself. The chief chef loved it though.

A soft sigh left her lips. Just as she raised her arm to remove her cloak a deep voice arose from the kitchen.

“Don’t tell me you brought food from class again.”

She immediately glanced over to see Levi seated at the dinner table. He set down the newspaper in his hand, despite being completely impassive there was a subtle gleam in his eyes.

He’d come home early and he knew it. He usually came home later in the night but it was merely a quarter after seven.

Her gaze dropped to the open box of chicken skewers at the center of the table. The plates and utensils had already been set out as well.

Her eyes widened as she remembered telling him last week that she missed the food they had at the festival together months ago. And chicken, at that—she was certain they must’ve cost a pretty penny.

He found them?!

Her rising excitement was quickly shot down when the bitter man’s earlier words rang through her mind.

You thought he messed up your career and took you to his place out of the kindness of his heart?

Naive girl.

Her expression faltered, her stomach lurching.

She inadvertently bent over, her hand cupping the lower half of her face as she got the sudden urge to puke. Nothing came out.

He shot out of his seat. “Devon-“

Before he could step towards her she straightened. 

She held out a hand, “Don’t move.”

His eyes were wide as he immediately stopped mid step. Standing completely still.

His brows furrowed when he noticed how pale she looked.

She swallowed, slowly lowering her hand, “I need to know something a-and don’t even think of lying to me.”

His eyes narrowed. His jaw clenching as he contemplated her words before settling on, “Go on.”

She spoke as firmly as she could manage—despite her thoughts running rampant within her head, “Tell me.. you didn't plan any of this. That you didn’t stop me from being a scout just to get me here, alone with you—to make me fall for you, j-just to..”

“To what.” The words felt curt despite his natural monotone.

She met his sharp, hard-set gaze. She didn’t need to look too long to see his thinly veiled anger.

She hesitated, feeling almost nervous to say it out loud but she knew she had to get it off her chest. Yet the words still seemed to stick to her tongue.

“To. what.” he repeated, his tone more severe somehow.

“To take advantage of me.” she spat, her chest heaving in and out-as if it took her a lot to say.

“Tch.” he scowled. His hand flat on the table curled into a fist at his side.

His silver eyes were sharper than razor blades, “You think I’d wait this long if all I wanted to do was fuck you.”

“If that’s all I saw you useful for what’s stopping me from fucking you the second I got you here.”

“Hell—what’s stopping me from fucking you in the damn training corps? You think your word would’ve mattered over mine if you snitched?”

Her eyes were blown wide—speechless.

His scowl deepened, “But you did get one thing right.”

He looked aside. His expression gloomy as he stared off elsewhere, “I never planned on sending you to the damn Scout corps.”

Her brows furrowed in astonishment.

He continued, a tad quietly, “Sometimes I think I knew the second I met you. You just.. reminded me of myself-a much, much better version of myself.”

“I never cared to talk to you. I watched you and didn’t hate you the second I saw you, so I figured that’d be enough to cut it with Erwin but you just-“ he grit his teeth, “you just had to be you.”

His narrow eyes met hers, “There was no way in hell I’d let you go through what I did.”

She felt her heartstrings tighten within her chest.

She forced her voice to come out steady, “That still wasn’t your choice to make.”

“Yeah? Was I just supposed to not give a shit? Was I supposed to assume you’d do great against a titan when you couldn’t even defend yourself against Carter?”

Her face twisted into a glare, “Yes.” she spat.

He returned her glare by a thousandfold, “You don’t know what you looked like on that Infirmary bed.”

“I don’t care! It’s better than having someone else make my decisions for me.”

He went quiet at that—his jaw clenching before he looked away. His dark hair covered his eyes as he faced downwards.

Her voice came out crisp, “And what then-if I still wanted to be a Scout?”

“You want to be a chef.”

“Yes, but if I didn’t—what would you do?”

He shifted-still not meeting her gaze, “That’s not—“

“Answer the question.” she snapped.

His eyes flashed to hers in an instant, “I obviously would’ve done everything in my fuckin’ power to not let that shit happen.”

Her eyes widened at the harshness of his tone, before her gaze hardened.

“You would’ve lost me.”

His posture stiffened, “I don’t lose if you’re alive.” 

She was rendered speechless at that. His face was a cold mask of indifference—she felt like she was back at day one with him. Back to the days where she couldn’t read any emotion off of him.

The air felt heavy between them, like a dark undercurrent that no one wanted to address. The silence only making it worse.

His hands tightened into fists at his sides before he ran a hand over the bottom half of his face.

He exhaled-before speaking lowly, “It’s me, right? It’s me that’s bothering you.”

His voice was flat, detached, “I’ll leave if that’s what you want. We both know this place is more useful to you than me-“

Her eyes widened, “What.” her voice wavered.

He took a step towards the door, “I’ll transfer the apartment's ownership to you whenever you want. If you need me-“

She ran towards him, not stopping until she stood directly before him.

“Levi, what are you saying?”

He couldn’t meet her eyes.

She searched his face, “That’s not what I want.”

His steel-gray eyes flashed to hers. Her heart skipping several beats when she saw the desperation in his eyes despite his gruff tone.

“What do you want.”

Her hands went to his chest. Her voice wavering, “I want you” -to stay.

His lips were on hers in an instant—stealing any incoming breath she had left. His arm wound around her waist, crushing her chest to his while slipping his hand up through her hair to hold her in place by the nape.

He pried her lips open with his and she couldn’t help but moan softly when he tilted his head to kiss her like he couldn’t get enough. His tongue moved against hers in that familiar way-that lit up her insides and left her weak to his advances. The butterflies in her gut kicked off at an unprecedented rate.

He drank her in with his lips. His grip on her faltering when she stumbled a bit—her sense of balance nowhere to be found.

Suddenly she was backed into the table. A short gasp leaving her lips when he grabbed her by the waist to sit her up on the tabletop.

He captured her lips once-more, her hands slipping around his neck in the process. A quiet sigh leaving his lips-mid kiss-at the feeling her chest being pressed up against his ignited.

His hand on her hip managed to find her skin once more. His fingers slipping underneath her shirt—his fingertips grazing her hip before cupping the curve of her waist. Her skin warm to his touch—he squeezed her waist, caressing-only to inadvertently make her shiver.

She immediately broke the kiss, only to flush when she met his gaze. She looked away-unable to maintain eye contact with him. Before he could let that bother him his eyes caught the untouched skin of her neck right before him-openly teasing him.

She gasped when she felt his lips latch onto her neck.

Her hands slid down his neck to his chest as she gripped his dress-shirt in her fists. The feeling of his warm mouth and teeth nipping at the sensitive skin of her neck was indescribable. Butterflies churned restlessly within her stomach.

His hand flat on the table by her side kept her from leaning away too far as she caved under his touch. His hand on her waist underneath her shirt slid up further. His palm slid over the skin of her ribs, his fingers grazing the edges of her bra.

A stuttered moan left her lips when his lips seemed to find a sweet spot on her neck. She lurched sensitively under his touch. Her hand on his shoulder squeezing tightly.

Her gaze flitted upto Levi’s when he backed up slightly. His steely, narrow eyes pierced into hers—making her body tremble slightly when he pressed his forehead to hers.

Her hands found the sides of his neck just as moved to make her lean back against the table.

“L-levi.” she nearly whispered, making him pause.

A deep hum emanated from his chest, “Hm.”

Her fingertips caressed the sides of his neck-scratching lightly in that way he liked it. His half lidded eyes fluttered close as his jaw locked.

He pressed his forehead into hers once-more, silently urging her to continue.

Her eyes widened when she realized he stood between her spread legs at the edge of the table. If her hips were a slight bit closer to the table’s edge her groin would’ve been right against his.

She shivered at the thought, before looking up to meet his gaze again.

“I’m a virgin.” she mumbled, her face hot.

He didn’t seem to react. Instead his silvery eyes seemed to search her face before his deep voice rumbled,

“You don’t think I can be gentle.”

Her face seemed to burn hotter, “Well.. I know it’s the last thing you want to be.”

She gasped when she was suddenly flat against the table. Her hands gripping his shoulders as he raised his forehead away from hers slightly, his face hovering before hers.

His dark gray eyes glimmered with barely veiled lust as he stared down at her. His ragged breaths trailed down her skin as he rasped, “The last.”

She blushed-hard.

She felt how tense his body was underneath the grip of her hands on his shoulders but.. to hear him sound like that. So restrained… it made her almost fearful of what was to come.

Her eyes flickered upto his, “How about this..”

Her heartbeat pounded rapidly within her chest as she came up with something on the spot, “If I leave my room door open.. at night.. that means I’m ready.”

His eyes widened and she couldn’t help but redden further.

She shifted slightly under him before placing her hand on the side of his face, “O-okay?”

A soft smile tugged at the end of his lip, he nodded. Strands of his black hair tickling her forehead.

The sight of his little smile stole all of her attention. He was just so handsome.

“Kiss me.” he ordered gruffly.

She intended to give him a peck but he pressed his lips down against hers—holding her lips captive for a moment longer. Her lips melting like butter under his.

He broke the kiss with a low sigh. His arm slipped around her back, easily lifting her upright as he stood up himself.

He stepped back, running a hand over his face before he noticed the other end of the table.

“You made the skewers go cold.” he grumbled.

When she didn’t respond he glanced over at her. His eyes widened when he noticed she was looking down at his lower region. He didn’t need to check himself to know he had a raging boner.

But to see her looking at it—all shy and nervous. Her hair disheveled and shirt rumpled from all their prior lip-lock. Her neck blooming with hickeys. His cock twisted in his pants, the tent growing noticeably larger.

Fuck.

His eyes narrowed, “Devon.”

She glanced up at him, eyes wide, only to glance back down again. She couldn’t seem to pry her eyes off of the bulge in his pants.

“Keep starin’ and I’m gonna make you do something about it.”

In truth he was embarrassed-really embarrassed-despite knowing it couldn’t be helped. Especially not with the way she drove him up the edge but taking control of the situation to watch her get flustered was always worth it.

The flush that spread across her cheeks was unmatched, “There’s nothing to stare at.”

She quickly hopped off the tabletop-intending to quickly pass him but his hand caught her wrist, yanking her towards him. His free hand clasped around her throat, pressing her back to his front.

She gasped when she felt the outline of his hard length against her bottom. Her body instinctively jerking away only for him to let go of her wrist and press his hand into her lower stomach–holding her in place. His hand at her navel didn’t stop though, continuously pressing her so that her bottom was flush against the tent at his groin. His cock throbbed appreciatively.

She twisted slightly under his hold before placing her hand over his at her navel–preventing his hand from going lower.

“L-levi..” she whined quietly, as his fingers tightened around her neck.

She heard his breath hitch before he turned his face into hers, his voice rough against her cheekbone.

“Nothing, huh.”

She shuddered and she swore she heard a low growl emit from his lips. It was taking everything in him to not grind his cock against her ass and bend her over the table to have his way. The warmth of her body felt too good against him. His cock was harder than stone-painfully so. He didn’t want the contact to end.

She swiftly pulled herself from his grasp–scurrying to the other side of the kitchen. He could’ve easily caught her but forced himself to keep it together. God knows what he would’ve done had she not slipped away just then. He didn’t want to act more impulsively than he already had–especially not after the consent she’d provided him today.

That was a lie. He wanted to act impulsively so bad… his cock was like a voice in his head, paying attention to every detail of her–making him lose his mind. But he cared more about her wishes and he was head-strong about that.

Or at least, one head was.

He watched her stand at the opposite end of the table. Her face flushed as she kept her arms crossed-unable to meet his eyes.

“That’s what I thought.” his low voice rumbled.

“I’m gonna kill him.” Levi muttered.

Devon was sitting on his lap, happily eating a chicken skewer when he’d asked her why she came home all guns ablaze today. She’d told him everything from top to bottom-starting from when the older woman had noticed her zoning out to when the bitter man bid her ‘good luck’ in that tone.

She was too happy to let that bitter man’s words get to her anymore. Maybe the food in her hands had something to do with it.

She looked over at him with a small smile, a playful squint to her eyes. “You want to kill everyone.”

“I don’t want to kill you.”

She paused, raising a brow, “Really?”

A moment of silence followed as he searched her face–completely expressionless, “Never mind.”

She broke out in a fit giggles and his eyes widened. He didn’t notice the small smile that had spread across his lips the longer he stared at her laugh. She always managed to make something within him melt.

His hand on her hip pulled her further up his lap. He reached over to wipe away a crumb from her bottom lip when her laughter subsided.

“You shouldn’t talk to strangers.” he advised, quietly.

“But the old lady looked nice.” she rebutted, lightly.

“You wouldn’t say the same about an old man.”

“What do you mean?”

His eyes narrowed as he saw her attempt to hide the shy yet goofy smile spreading across her lips.

She continued, “I’m with you after all.”

Just as she lifted herself off his lap, his hands found her hips–firmly planting her back down on his thigh. His hands were at her sides–tickling the living shit out of her. She gasped-twisting, turning, laughing all at once as she flailed within his arms.

“Levi! Stop—stop. Please–” she choked out through laughs.

He didn’t stop, only continuing to tickle her relentlessly, “Old man? That what I am to you.”

“I was joking–joking–ah!” she cried out through giggles.

He finally stopped, letting her head fall into his chest as she went limp from his tickles. She took a moment to catch her breath.

She finally opened her eyes, “You’re the worst.” she mumbled.

His small smile reappeared, “Mhm.”

She shoved his chest, “I mean it!”

There was a moment’s pause before he spoke.

“ ‘Oh I know that look. You’re in love, aren't you?’ “ he mocked the old woman’s words from the encounter she’d just recounted.

Her eyes widened. She’d meant to leave that detail out but he didn’t understand how Devon became tempted to share their ‘story’ to a stranger so she’d just told him. She hadn’t expected him to bring it up though.

She blushed-retorting, “She was just saying that. It doesn’t mean anything.”

“So you weren’t thinking of me.”

She blinked, “I-erm-I.. I was but-”

“That’s all I need to hear.”

She glanced up at him-her heart skipping a beat. Despite the words coming from his typical low, flat tone–the words felt oddly gentle.

She straightened up slightly, feeling shy. Maybe it was childish of her but the ‘L’ word felt rather intimidating. Not in the sense that she was simply scared to say it but because she still wasn’t sure if she knew what it fully meant. In her mind the closest she felt connected to the word was when she thought of how she would do anything in the world for her friends.

Would I do anything in the world for Levi?

The first time she’d said those three words was to her adoptive father. Even if she’d said the words innocently-and meant it as purely as a child would’ve, it left a scar. One that wasn’t physical–because we all knew how that had turned out.

Levi assessed her quietly. Watching her eat in silence without that usual spark in her eye. He knew something was brewing in her little mind.

His hand went to her temple, tucking her hair behind her ear. His silver eyes raked down the darkening hickeys on her neck. The sight shouldn't have elicited the deep rooted wave of satisfaction that it did.

“Oi.” he spoke calmly-forcing himself to focus on the task at hand.

She glanced over at him.

“What’re you thinking about so hard.”

She blinked before a soft smile spread across her lips. Who am I kidding–I’d do anything for him.

The realization made her heart flutter and also made a small laugh leave her lips. She couldn’t help but think of how absurd it was for her to realize right after he asked such a question.

She leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek, “Nothing.” she murmured, airily, before turning back to her food. He watched her continue to eat with wide eyes.

He sighed-before grumbling as he squeezed her hips, “Keep doin’ that and this old man’s never gonna let you go.”

She blushed, “Maybe that’s the goal.”

“Careful what you wish for.”

He began to tickle her again and she cried out, “Levi!!”

She immediately flushed—her cheekbone grazing his as she turned around to look at him. The circles around his eyes were noticeably lighter than before. His hair was also a bit rumpled from sleep.

“Did I wake you?”

When she’d left her room he looked as if he were deep asleep on the couch. But she knew he was a light sleeper.

He shook his head, “Been up for an hour.”

What he didn’t say was that he was waiting for her. He’d meant to prepare breakfast for them but once he sat back down on the couch he zoned out. The next thing he knew he’d dozed off into a light sleep.

She nodded at his statement. She thought she had heard the faint sound of someone entering the bathroom an hour ago.

He sidled up close to her, standing close enough that her back was pressed into the counter-their groins millimeters apart. His hand still on her hip.

The second she met his gaze his lips found hers.

She melted under his mouth—a low whimper leaving her lips as he kissed her, hard. He kissed her like he’d gone too long without her.

In fact, he almost always kissed her like that.

Her hands went to this chest. His chest was so firm it was impossible not to notice-it wasn't like the thin material of the long sleeve he wore did much to conceal it either.

His lips moved eagerly over hers, his hand on her hip and the other on the counter beside her were the only thing stopping him from pressing his groin into her. He wanted to say it was morning wood but he knew that wasn’t it, his body always reacted to her.

It didn’t matter if he’d taken care of himself already or not.

Her hand went to his neck, pulling herself away. Her face red and dazed.

Her lips moved reluctantly, “L-Levi, the eggs-“

He quickly reached over and shut off the stove. She moved to prepare the eggs but his hand on her hip pulled her back.

His dark gray eyes unwavering, “Come home for lunch.” he reminded her.

She flushed. They were always thinking of the next time they’d see each other.

Her hand on his neck twitched, “I can’t-“ she realized with a subtle frown.

“I have a short shift at the store and then I have to get to school right after.”

Now that culinary school was in the picture her work shift timings varied. Typically, long shifts she always got breaks but not so much with shorter shifts.

“When do you get back.”

“I think 6? Maybe 7.”

He wasn’t sure when he’d be done so he couldn’t guarantee that he’d be home by that time either.

“Come straight home after.” he muttered.

She chuckled lightly, her hand on his chest sliding down to his forearm.

“Don’t worry—I ran all my errands with you yesterday, remember?”

He merely grunted in response.

Suddenly a short gasp left her lips. His eyes immediately latched onto her.

“Shoot, I actually have to get—“

When his eyes immediately sharpened she couldn’t help but break out in laughter. It was just too easy to set him off.

His scowl deepened, “Tch, don’t mess with me.”

She continued to laugh lightly and he squeezed her hip, inadvertently making her glance up his way.

Her subtle smile and lively eyes sent a tumbling sensation of warmth throughout his body. His gray eyes scanned her face expressionlessly.

Her smile never failed to make him question how he got her. 

He leaned forward, pressing his lips to hers once more. That smile was his to claim. his to cherish. his to undo.

The morning air felt crisp against her tongue. Maybe it was because the sun had just risen, leaving the sky to be a beautiful blend of orange and pink.

She’d normally be getting up at this hour but the bookstore was receiving an early shipment today, so Larsa wanted her to come in earlier. They still had a couple hours before the store had to open.

She tensed when she felt a hand gently touch her back.

She glanced over her shoulder to see Levi at her side. He wore a brown cloak over his white dress-shirt, a hint of his cravat peeking underneath the cloak’s hood.

His silver eyes searched her face, “What is it.”

She hadn’t realized she’d stopped in the middle of the street.

She blinked, glancing around at the empty street. She supposed she’d subconsciously wanted to take a moment to appreciate the silence that the early morning hours offered. It was rare to see the roads deserted like this.

Her workplace wasn’t much farther either.

She glanced back at him, “Nothing. The sky looked nice, that’s all.”

She watched him glance up. The brightly colored sky almost seemed to bring about a faint glow to his face. The gentle breeze made strands of his dark hair sway underneath his hood.

She belatedly realized that Levi was always up at this hour. He was usually out of the apartment by this time, presumably at Scout headquarters.

She was suddenly filled with this inane sense of jealousy. It didn’t take her long to realize that she was envious he got to see the sunrise everyday—maybe if she’d been a Scout she could’ve got to see the sunrise everyday as well. 

With him..

Her eyes widened as an image flooded her mind.

She stood on the rooftop of what she imagined the Scout headquarters to look like. Her hair was tied back in a low bun at the nape of her neck, similar to the way she’d kept it at the training corps-except it was much neater. She wore a Scout uniform.

Levi stood beside her, also dressed in uniform. His hand in hers. That beautiful sunlit glow to his face as he stared at the sunrise before them.

He turned his head—catching her staring. A flicker of a smile tugged at the end of his lip.

“It is nice.” he muttered.

His deep voice drew her from her thoughts. She quickly faced away from him, feeling a bit disheveled.

She felt his hand at her back shift slightly before she was suddenly pulled against his chest. Her eyes were wide as she looked up at him.

His expression was as stoic as ever.

She flushed, “L-Levi..” her tone held a note of admonishment as she instinctively glanced around, despite there being no people around to watch them.

Her arm shifted slightly under his hold only for his grip to tighten. He dragged her by the elbow into the nearest alleyway.

Before she had the chance to protest she was shoved against the brick wall, his lips insistent on hers.

She gasped, providing him the perfect opportunity to slip his tongue through her lips. His hand slipped underneath her cloak—sliding down her side before squeezing the curve of her waist.

She jolted responsively underneath him, her lower lip quivering under his—but his hand against the wall kept them steady.

His lips were relentless, kissing her as if there was nothing he wanted more-as if he couldn’t get enough.

Her body blazed underneath him, her skin warm to his touch. Her hands went to his shoulders, her fingers trembling slightly from his forcefulness. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest, like a dove flying helplessly in its golden cage.

Her hands went to the sides of his neck, pushing him back slightly.

Their kiss broke and she quickly turned her head aside—so he wouldn’t be able to press his lips to hers again.

His cool breaths scattered down her cheek, past her collarbones, as his nose nudged her temple. His lips skimmed her cheekbone.

She squeezed her eyes shut, her heart and mind completely scrambled. She never stood a chance against him, not when his touch did that to her.

She clamped her hand around her mouth, trying to quell the sound of her restless breathing.

Suddenly his grip on her waist tightened. She yelped underneath her hand, instinctively facing forward.

His gray eyes shimmered in the darkness of the alleyway. He shifted closer to her, pressing his forehead to hers.

She noticed he always kept some distance between them whenever they kissed, even if it was just a slim amount-a millimeter or so-he never fully pressed himself against her during their lip lock.

His eyes latched onto her hand covering her mouth. His nose grazed hers as he ordered, gruffly-

“Move that hand.”

She flushed-hard-only to clamp her fingers tighter around her mouth.

She shook her head, too breathless to speak.

“Why.” his deep voice rumbled.

She knew she shouldn’t. Her mind was already too scrambled by his touch-his kisses-as is. More lip-lock would only make it worse. She couldn’t go to work in this state.

“I have to go to w-work.” she managed to rasp out.

His brows furrowed. A subtle frown appearing on his lips as he remembered. It was obvious that it had completely slipped his mind.

For some reason, she couldn’t help but find his expression adorable. A smile lit her lips, although hidden under her hand.

A soft, shy laugh left her lips, “I never thought you would be like this.” she murmured, feeling almost too shy to say the words aloud.

Pale pink instantly spread along his cheekbones. He kept up his natural monotone as he responded, “Is it that bad that I wanna kiss my woman.”

It was her turn to flush, “N-no..”

“Then.”

She looked down, too embarrassed to maintain eye contact.

Her words came out muffled under her hand, “Uh-um.. I just.. I get shocked you like me that much.”

Something flashed across his eyes before his countenance smoothed over. His hand on her waist twitched before he stepped back from her.

He looked away, his dark hair covering his eyes. His hands clenched into fists at his sides.

“Am I..” his flat tone held an odd undercurrent, “too much?”

Her eyes widened as she sputtered out, “N-no. It’s not that..”

His eyes flashed to hers, the relief ever-present in his gaze before his brows furrowed.

“Explain.” he ordered.

She opened her mouth and then closed it. She felt too embarrassed to say it-but she knew he wasn’t going to let it go.

His eyes narrowed.

She swallowed, fighting to keep her voice even, “I don’t know—I’m just surprised you w-want me, that’s all.”

She looked away from him. It wasn’t that she thought herself unworthy of his affection or anything but she supposed after him being so apathetic towards her for so long his passion still shocked her.

She always used to struggle with the idea of whether he wanted her around or not. She used to internally question if she was a burden to him all the time until he finally clarified she wasn’t.

But maybe… there was a bit of insecurity. He was the Scout Regiment’s strongest soldier. While she was just a bookstore worker and culinary student. She lived at his place and didn't pay for a thing-not that he would let her. To anyone else it could easily look as if she were a gold digger.

It didn’t help that she was so much younger than him and her body was already so scarred and damaged from her past. He’d also been through so much himself and yet he’d truly made something of himself. Whether he acknowledged it or not, he was making a difference in the world.

She couldn’t help but wonder… if she truly was the one for him.

“Tch,” the edge to his voice was audible, “Don’t piss me off.”

When she didn’t meet his eyes, he realized she was truly serious. Not that he ever doubted her words but-goddammit—

Suddenly he was grabbing her collar, forcing her to look up at him.

“Do you have the slightest fuckin’ clue what you do to me?” he hissed, the scowl on his lips so harsh she nearly flinched.

His silver eyes raked down her face, “Being alone with you.. is hard for me.”

“Right now—At home—“ he spoke through gritted teeth, “Doesn’t matter where the hell I am..”

His grip on her collar tightened, forcing her forehead to press against his, “You remind me I’m a man every single day.”

His low, severe tone was filled with such bitterness she couldn’t help but shiver. His narrow, gray-blue eyes were dark with something she couldn’t put to words.

She swallowed before murmuring, “Levi..”

Her hands went around his forearm, holding the arm that was gripping her collar. His eyes widened when he realized he was pulling her shirt hard enough that her collar was biting into her skin.

He immediately stepped back, releasing her.

She couldn’t look at him–her mind was left spinning after his words. She couldn’t help but feel aware of the fact that she was alone with him now–despite having always been. Her hand went to her nape, attempting to readjust her collar.

She froze when she heard him grumble quietly, “Question whatever the hell you want, but don’t question how much I want you.”

She glanced over at him. He was looking elsewhere, his posture stiff. She didn’t miss the faint flush on his cheeks.

His eyes flitted towards her, “Okay?”

She nodded, slowly.

A moment of silence ensued–leaving an air of uncertainty between them.

She suddenly stepped up to him. Her steps were purposeful yet hesitant. Her expression was unreadable to him.

He tensed when she stood before him. He wanted to touch her–but he also wanted to see what she would do.

She searched his face before gently slipping her hand under his cloak. When her fingers brushed over his belt loops his eyes widened. 

Before he could react, she deftly slid her hand into his pocket and retrieved his pocket watch. A soft blush decorated her cheeks as she flipped the watch open to check the time.

“I’m late to work.” she muttered before pressing the pocket watch to his chest and releasing it.

He instinctively caught it.

She quickly turned around and moved to head out of the alleyway but he was faster. He caught her wrist and pulled her back to him.

His jaw was clenched as he peered at her, “You thought you could get away with that.”

She fought to hide her little smile, “What? I’m just trying to go to work.”

His grip on her wrist tightened, “You did that on purpose.”

His low tone made her body warm up.

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” she mumbled, her nerves buzzing within her body.

His hand on her wrist tugged her closer, their noses brushing against each other.

“Then why are you smiling.”

Her smile immediately widened, she hadn’t realized it had broken loose.

Her eyes sparkled as she murmured, “What. I can’t smile at my man?”

For once, he was speechless. The deep flush that bloomed on his cheeks was unmistakable. To think he could look so flustered because of a simple sentence.. She beamed victoriously.

Her stomach brewed with butterflies as she leaned over to press a gentle kiss to his cheek. His eyes widened.

She kept a hand on his chest as she rose on her tiptoes slightly–to speak softly into his ear, “See you at home.”

She backed away–not waiting for a response as she quickly bolted out of the alleyway. She didn’t want to run any later than she already was.

He watched her disappear onto the street before running a hand over his face.

Since when did I let this woman get such a hold on me?

Of all the things she could’ve said, her intoxicated self chose to say that.

She didn’t remember much of what happened yesterday evening, it was still coming back to her in bits and pieces. But for some reason–she remembered everything from their last encounter clearly.

How handsome he’d looked sitting at the edge of the bed. His cravat loose on his shoulders and the dark contrast of his suit in the dim candlelit room. The dark hair atop his undercut slightly ruffled–as if he’d been running his hands through it occasionally.

She had to question if he was real.

She couldn’t get his tiny little laugh out of her head. His subtle chuckle after her meekly said threat. She wished she’d seen his face when he’d laughed. It was stupid… she knew, but she wished she’d just seen it.

She shook her head, letting her hands fall from her face.

Last night was supposed to be something different–something nice. It was supposed to be a light, fun evening that allowed her to unwind with the new people in her life. An excuse to dress-up and simply enjoy herself.

Instead, she’d fully passed out and gotten escorted out the bookstore in Levi’s arms.

She smacked herself in the forehead.

She was supposed to handle her liquor better than that. She was convinced that not embarrassing herself in front of her coworkers was simply not an option for her.

Though, she supposed Levi being there was truly a lifesaver.

She looked in the mirror’s reflection, at the cold cup of tea and folded towel on the nightstand–then the empty bucket at her bedside. He’d been so prepared to take care of her.

Instead she’d awoken only for a moment. To tell him a lame threat and get lulled to sleep in his arms.

She still couldn’t believe he’d let her lean on him. He’d stroked his hands through her hair, and hadn’t complained about her rambling. She wasn’t sure what she expected… but, it felt… almost unusual to be looked after.

She was just so used to feeling like she was looking after him whenever he came. Bandaging up his wounds. Leaving extra food in the fridge for him to eat. Preparing his pillow and blanket on the couch since he was starting to sleep at the apartment more often.

She liked feeling like she was making his day a slight bit easier.

But she forgot, it was him at the end of the day… making her life easier. He didn’t want a penny for rent. He didn’t want her paying for groceries when he was around. In fact, he didn’t want to see any of her earnings used on necessities. He also never asked her how long she planned on staying.

He was always willing to take care of her.

She still wasn’t sure if she even understood it–why he’d do such a thing. It still felt out of character for him to do.

All she knew was the indescribable feeling she got in her gut when he was near. He didn’t even need to touch her to light her up. There was this subdued magnetism… one that she wasn’t fully sure how to acknowledge.

His lingering stares. Easy touches. Reassuring words. They were all affecting her somehow.

And now, he was gone. Back to his job.

She didn’t even get the chance to ask for how long…

The ache that spread within her shouldn’t have felt as strong as it did. She swallowed hard, her hands curling into fists as she rested her head on her arms–completely leaning on the vanity.

Levi had installed a vanity in her room a week ago, along with a matching stool. She’d been too flabbergasted to speak on it. She just hadn’t expected him to notice the not-so-neat stack of bins she’d bought to stuff her things into.

Everything was reminding her of him.

She shoved off the vanity, seating herself upright on her stool. She stared back at her red-rimmed eyes in the mirror. She could almost see the turmoil within them. The ache within her was almost too tangible–too real. It wasn’t good for her… missing him like this.

She looked down at the hair tie on her wrist–the hair tie he’d given her.

“You have to come back.” she whispered.

Her fingers shook subtly as she touched the hair tie, “You have to, Levi.” her voice cracked.

She was shouldered aside and she automatically snapped her head up.

Just as her eyes narrowed at the young man he raised his hands up, “Sorry, Miss.”

She merely looked away and sighed under her breath. The main road was unusually packed today, she just wanted to get home in peace.

She readjusted her cloak’s hood before glancing into a nearby alleyway. She’d only taken that route a few times-when she was in a rush-but she supposed anything was better than being stuck in this horde of slow moving people.

She slipped into the dim alley. She kept her eyes low, careful to avoid stepping on the trash.

She glanced around, doing her best to ignore the ominous feeling of being the only one using the alleyway. Though, she supposed she couldn’t blame others for not wanting to use this route–the stench of garbage had somehow worsened.

She nearly flinched when she saw a stray cat scurry past her.

She chuckled at herself. She’d been feeling a bit out of sorts all day so she supposed it was catching up to her now that she was alone.

She shrugged it off before raising her hand to cover her nose as she walked onwards.

She was suddenly forced to halt when a shadow passed before her.

She froze before deftly looking around. Nothing had changed in front of her so–she looked up. Other than the rather gloomy sky there was nothing to see beyond the edge of the rooftops.

She frowned–not wanting to be in the alleyway longer than necessary so she picked up her pace.

A shadow appeared before her again and this time she immediately glanced up. She caught sight of the edge of something disappearing into the nearby rooftop.

She didn’t waste a second and instinctively broke out into a run. She didn’t know what the hell that was and she didn’t want to find out.

Her hand gripped her bags firmly as she ran. Her other hand drew her cloak close to her chest.

The shadow passed overhead once more and she almost faltered mid-step.

No way. She must be imagining it–but she swore she thought she heard the familiar whirring sound of ODM gear.

ODM gear–here? She couldn’t understand why-or how? But she didn’t get the chance to think too much of it because bits of pebbles and dust began to suddenly fall from overhead.

Whoever it was seemed to be running alongside her on the nearby rooftop.

A jolt of fear spiked through her body and her pace picked up drastically. She was now more than certain she was being pursued.

She ran full-speed out of the alleyway–almost crashing into someone dragging along a cart.

“Sorry!” she yelled out haphazardly before bolting to her apartment building.

She shoved open the building doors before bounding up the steps to her floor. She quickly slipped her keys out of her cloak pocket before roughly unlocking the door and slamming it closed behind her.

Her breath was ragged as she raised a shaky hand to lower her hood–only to freeze when she saw Levi standing in the middle of the living room.

In the midst of her panic she didn’t notice that the living room windows were wide open or that he was fully strapped in his Scout attire, ODM gear as well. And that she wasn’t the only one breathless.

Relief seeped into her the second her eyes landed on him.

She ran towards him, “Levi! Thank God you're here,”

Her hand absentmindedly went to his chest as she quickly turned her head aside to eye the door–instinctively checking to see if her pursuer had followed her here. 

She spoke through short breaths, “There was someone–following me–with ODM gea–”

Suddenly, firm hands grabbed the curve of her waist–forcing her to face him as she was pulled flush against his chest.

The next thing she knew his lips were on hers.

The bags fell from her hand.

She gasped at the pressure of his lips on hers. His lips were unrelenting–almost begging, begging for her.

Her hands found the sides of his face and suddenly the kiss intensified. His arms held her so close that she felt his racing heartbeat against her skin. His chest was taut against hers, his skin warm to touch.

And suddenly the world was non-existent. No one else but them. She didn’t care about his sweat, the way the belts of his uniform bit into her skin or the way he kissed her like he’d die if he didn’t.

She wasn’t breathing, only letting his lips do whatever they wanted. Her body alight in a way she’d never experienced. She didn’t want it to stop. His hands on her felt as if they were born to be there–and he seemed to know it too because he couldn’t stop touching her.

His hands slid from her waist to her hips to all over her back–touching, caressing, grasping–before winding an arm around her back so hard that the front of her body was completely pasted to his. She couldn’t breathe but she didn’t need to–because his lips–his lips.

He pried her lips open with his and slid his tongue through hers–as if desperate to find something within her. She tried to match his intensity but–he was too wanting, too needy. The hunger in his touch… god, she couldn’t take it.

Her mind was lost in a complete haze as his hand slipped into her hair, holding her head close to him as he kissed her further. His lips never leaving hers–even for a second–it was as if he were afraid she might disappear at a moment's notice.

His arm around her so firm that she couldn’t even move if she wanted to–but that was the last thing she wanted. There was nowhere else she’d rather be. Nowhere else that would feel like this.

Her hands slipped into his damp, dark hair. Her chest pushing into his as she kissed him back.

His response was immediate. He tilted his head, impossibly deepening the kiss.

She gasped, letting a hand drop to his shoulder as she tried to keep herself from losing balance. Her whole body felt alive. Wherever they touched, her skin was ablaze. Her thoughts raced–at an even faster pace than her thrumming heartbeat. She couldn’t believe this was happening.

She staggered backwards and broke the kiss. She inhaled a desperately needed breath.

His hands didn’t leave her–continuing to hold her upright as she caught her breath.

His face was flushed, bits of dirt and a faint pink scar along his jaw marked his features. Sweat made strands of his dark hair stick to his forehead. There was an edge of lust in his narrow eyes but it was nearly obscured by the look of sincerity and restlessness on his face. He looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks.

And suddenly she knew–with dawning certainty. Something is wrong.

Her hands in his hair slid low around his neck, her thumbs grazing his jaw as she spoke, “What happened?”

He looked down, “N-Nothing. I’m just.. happy you're here.”

“Why?”

He was quiet for a moment. She could almost see the thoughts brewing within his mind.

She stared at him intently. Her gaze dropped from his face to her hands on his neck—still in complete disbelief that she was touching him.

He was so tense that she could feel it at every point of her skin that was in contact with his. He’d even been tense throughout their lip lock.

He shook his head, “I’m being stupid.” he spit out lowly.

“No..” she prompted.

His eyes met hers once more. Despite their typical sharpness she could almost see through it now—the undercurrent of forlornness within them.

He searched her face. His eyes lingering on her lips but she gently placed her fingers over his mouth—not letting him get away. She knew if she let him kiss her again she’d completely lose her train of thought.

“Tell me.” she urged—her voice uneven.

His lips moved against her fingers, “We lost about 190 soldiers. Nearly three fourths of the entire damn regiment.”

His expression was bitter, full of resentment and hopelessness. It was clear he’d been around to see it all. She could only imagine what a sight that must’ve been.

His eyes were distant, lost somewhere lower on her body as he continued.

“We were surrounded… but Corinna..”

His eyes flickered towards her-watching as her eyes widened.

“Corinna? My roommate?”

Corinna was her roommate in the Training Corps. They weren’t particularly close but Corinna always performed well during the activities—apparently she ranked high as well. Plenty of the boys in their corps had a crush on her, Keith being one of them.

The only thing Devon ever concerned herself with-in relation to her-was when she tried not to wake her whenever she snuck out for her nightly kitchen escapades.

He nodded, averting his eyes.

“She was recently added to my squad. She died right in front of me—I know-“ he gritted out his words, struggling, “I know s-she’s not you. But I-you were the first thing I thought of—It felt like you.”

She didn’t need to hear the words to know what he’d been thinking. It could’ve been you.

She saw his eyes widen—as if reliving it.

“I wasn’t fast enough.” he said almost too quietly to hear.

“Levi.” she gasped out, before bringing his forehead down to hers.

“Stop.” she ordered, heartache making her voice waver.

It wasn’t surprising that he saw similarities between her and Corinna. In fact the entire cadet corps saw it when it became apparent how good the girls were. It was a running joke for a time that their room ‘2A’ was for two aces. Devon didn’t care much for it but Corinna ate it up.

The jokes soon ended when Devon’s skill grew unmatched.

Last she remembered, Corinna had gotten ranked in the top ten so she was sure the girl was going to join the Military Police. It came as quite the surprise to hear that she chose to be a Scout. It made her respect her more somehow… not that it mattered anymore.

“You did as much as you could.” she didn’t need to be there to believe that. She just knew he must’ve.

She saw the spiteful doubt crawl into his eyes but the second he met her gaze it slipped away. He must’ve seen her conviction.

“I know it.” she added, her voice steady.

He was still for a moment before she felt his shoulders sag. His hand on the back of her head slid down to her neck, his fingers raking through her hair.

“You’re right here.” The low rumble of his deep voice seemed to ignite the air between them.

His hand tightened around her nape, drawing her closer.

“Wait,” she blushed before stammering out, “Y-you should shower.”

A glint of humor broke across his stoic expression, “You sayin’ I stink?”

She couldn’t help but crack a smile, “Maybe.”

A tiny smile of his own seemed to flicker across his lips.

His grip on her loosened as he stepped back. He threw off his dark green cloak before efficiently unstrapping his ODM gear–it was clear he’d done it several times before.

He glanced at her, faint pink creeping into his cheeks.

“Don’t go anywhere.” He ordered.

She watched him slip into the bathroom.

In truth, she hadn’t even minded his smell. In fact, she didn’t mind anything that had just transpired and that simple fact was sending her into a complete disarray.

That kiss… it wasn’t a kiss of someone who’d just randomly did something on a whim. Sure, it might’ve been an impulse move on his part but… that was the kiss of someone who was yearning. He kissed her like he’d been craving her.

And his words… he’d gotten that unsettled because he’d lost his comrades and because… he’d thought of her when Corinna died. He thought of her in Corinna’s place.

He thinks of me when he’s away?

For some reason she hadn’t thought he did. He was always so good at masking his emotions she wasn’t sure… she always doubted… 

She ran her hands over her face. Her thoughts were completely scrambled.

“What is happening?” she whispered to herself.

Corinna is dead.

The first one of her cadet mates that she’d heard of passing on. Her stomach sank at the thought. She didn’t need to be close to the girl to feel her loss.

Her breath came out ragged as she ran her hands through her hair once more. She felt like she was losing her mind.

She suddenly wished Imada were here. She needed to talk to someone—anyone–someone else. She needed air. Fresh air. That would help.

She straightened, readjusting her cloak around herself as she quickly walked over to the bathroom. 

“I’m–I’m gonna step out for some air!” she shouted so he could hear her over the running shower.

She quickly turned around and headed for the front door. Just as she pulled it open, a hand appeared beside her head–slamming it shut.

“Where are you going?”

She froze. She felt his forehead against the crown of her head.

“I just wanted to take a walk, s-so I could think.” her words came out in a whisper.

“Think here.”

When she didn’t respond his free hand found her hip, easily turning her around. She backed into the door.

She had to hold her breath to not gasp out loud at the sight before her. He was shirtless, his dark hair dripping wet. His pale, scarred skin dotted with water as well, his muscles taut with tension. His pants looked as if they’d been put on in a rush–hanging a little too low on his built frame.

His sharp eyes searched her face, “Okay?”

She couldn’t think when he looked at her like that–so much concern and want—maybe even a hint of fear. She couldn't ignore the tinge of desperation in his tone.

“Give me five minutes. I can walk with you, just..”

His hand left her hip to cup the side of her face, “Don’t leave.” he spoke quietly.

Her breath caught.

He appeared strained as his thumb brushed over her plump bottom lip.

The next thing she knew his lips were on hers, probing at first before growing more wanting when he heard her low whimper.

She pressed her hands to his wet chest as he kissed her–driving her head further against the wall. She could feel his fervor thrumming through the heat of his skin. The cool water dripping down his face doing nothing to quell it.

Her hands curled over his firm shoulders, her hands shaky as she kissed him–attempting to kiss him back when all she wanted to do was melt. Her thoughts a complete muddled mess.

He pushed her up into the door–nearly pressing his groin against her only to catch himself a millisecond before. He pressed both of his hands into the door, forcing himself to pry his lips off of her.

“Fuck.” he gritted out, his hands curling into fists. He had to calm down.

All he wanted to do was slide his hands around her thighs and wrap her legs around himself–but he knew if he did that he wouldn’t stop.

Her face felt hot, she didn’t need to look at herself to know she was probably blazing red. Her lips parted, inhaling and exhaling rapidly as she tried to find her breath. He always seemed to chase it away.

She absentmindedly watched one of her hands slowly slide down his chest, his wet skin was marked with healed scars. Some weren’t completely healed–like the one at his navel. It was the one she’d bandaged up months ago and yet its scar still hadn’t faded. She wanted to touch it–

He caught her wrist, his ragged breath made his words sound rough, “Don’t leave.” he repeated.

She was drawn out of her daze. She tried to respond but no words came out, so she merely nodded.

He watched her intently–doubt swirling within his gut but he used his hand on the door to push himself back. He knew if he stayed there any longer he wouldn’t leave her alone.

She finally met his eyes, despite the harshness of his cold gaze she finally saw through it. The veiled indecision.

“I’ll be right here.” she found her voice–even if it was hoarse.

His headstrong stare never left her as he nodded.

He turned around, running a hand through his wet hair before disappearing back into the bathroom.

She stood still for a moment before sliding down to sit against the door with her knees to her chest. She raised her shaky hand to touch her swollen lips in disbelief.

She knew he’d be hungry after his shower so she decided to postpone their walk.

He watched her observantly as she prepared their dinner. She kept her eyes glued to the plate before her. Once she finished pouring the soup into the bowl she carefully placed the bowl onto a plate. The plate had cut up pieces of bread to dip into the soup.

She carefully held up both of their plates before setting his down in front of him. She hesitantly placed hers down in the seat next to his. Normally, she sat across from him but…

Just as she was about to move her plate back to her usual seat across from him, his hand slipped around her wrist and sat her down on his lap. She froze, trying not to focus on the feeling of his firm thigh against her ass.

She glanced down, eyeing her legs between his spread legs. Her face felt hot.

He kept a hand on her back as he reached around her to pull her plate next to his.

“Smells delicious.” he murmured.

She’d used a new recipe from one of the cookbooks from the bookstore. One she particularly liked because it was quick to make. Wild rice & mushroom soup. She liked to add spinach to it.

He easily broke off a piece of bread and bit into it. He peered at her tense frame from the corner of his eye.

He slightly raised the thigh she was seated on–to catch her attention, “Eat.”

She glanced at her steaming plate before turning to look at him. God, he was so close.

“Since when did you want to kiss me?”

This time he froze–he held her gaze, “A while.”

“Since when?”

“Am I supposed to know the exact second I wanted to suck your face off?” His natural monotone made the question sound all the more mocking.

She blushed–embarrassed. His jaw locked to mask his chuckle.

He decided to answer, his tone a tad gentle, “I’d say.. started sometime at the training corps, after our late dinners.”

She squinted in doubt, “Impossible.”

“Why.”

“You never acted like you liked me.”

“Why would I. You were a cadet, I wasn’t even supposed to think about you.”

A faint blush appeared on her cheeks as she contemplated that. She supposed he was right–as her instructor he must’ve felt obligated to ignore those thoughts but.. to think he started to see her like that, that soon? She couldn’t quite comprehend it.

What did you even see in me?

She froze when she realized she just asked that question out loud.

“Are you serious?” There was an edge of annoyance in his flat tone. “Don’t act like you don’t know how tempting you are.”

He didn’t miss the light pink color sweeping across her cheeks to the tips of her ears. Or how her legs shifted.

His eyes narrowed, “I’ve never wanted to ruin someone and watch ‘em succeed til you.”

She didn’t know how to take his monotonous words, or the indescribable undercurrent within them.

She merely let out a small awkward laugh, “Ruin’s a bit dramatic–”

His hand on her back moved discreetly. He wrapped a strand of her hair around his index and middle finger before pulling—making her gasp as her head tilted back.

His eyes ran down her parted lips, down the inviting column of her neck.. His gaze hardened with distaste.

“Look at you.” a dark edge to his calm voice, “This pretty face s’just begging to be ruined.”

She turned away from him, easily pulling her hair out of his grasp in the process. She didn’t want him to see how much his words were affecting her.

She always thought she wanted to hear him compliment her—she just didn’t expect it to undo her like this.

Her heart raced, “Don’t flatter me.”

“Do I look like the flattery type.”

They both knew the answer to that.

But there were still more answers that she wanted to hear from him. So much she wanted to know and uncover.

“Why.. why did you wait so long?” she kept her eyes away from his.

His eyes widened before a small smile flitted across his lips. He raised his knee, drawing her further down his leg—closer to him.

His nose grazed her jaw, “Ah, do you wish I acted sooner?”

She shivered when his thumb began to make circles on her back. She was too distracted to form words.

He continued, quietly, “I wasn’t sure you wanted me.”

She met his gaze, “What made you think I want you now?”

“I never thought that–not until you kissed me back.”

His usual flat tone ended on a somewhat light note. A rare occurrence really–rare enough to make her go silent in shock.

He’d said those words with such.. simplicity—as if that were the only explanation he needed. He sounded almost… happy.

He leaned forward and pressed a delicate kiss to her lips. When he pulled away she was still staring at him—unbelieving. Even his most delicate kisses were doing something to her.

He must’ve caught something in her gaze because his grip on her back suddenly tightened–his fingers curling around her waist. His lips were on hers again, more demanding this time.

His free hand slipped around her throat, drawing her face closer. She melted underneath him, letting him hold onto her as he took reign over her lips. Her hand went to his chest.

His lips felt so good it was nearly impossible to register. She never thought it was possible to feel this way. She felt like she was levitating.

She pulled away slightly.

He leaned forward, unready to part lips with her.

She pressed her fingertips to his lips, “I-I can’t breathe.” she murmured.

He went still, his eyes never leaving her face as she caught her breath.

Her brows furrowed before she placed her hand over his face.

She flushed, “Don’t look at me.”

She felt him smile underneath her lips, “My apologies…”

He removed her hand from his face, “-for looking directly in front of myself.”

Her eyes widened before she huffed slightly. She rose off of him.

Before she could even get to her feet, a hand slipped around her stomach—pushing her back down.

“Who told you to move?”

She was beet-red, “I-I can’t eat like this.”

He reached over and dipped a piece of bread into the soup. He raised the piece of bread to her lips.

She instinctively opened her mouth and took a bite.

“Not too hard, was it.”

“Shut up.”

She grabbed a book from the shelf before glancing over.

Levi sat on the couch, looking rather focused as he wrote on the paper before him on the coffee table.

They both had stepped out to try take a walk moments ago but the second they stepped out of the building, all they did was share one look and simultaneously went back inside. It was way too cold.

Levi had decided to do some work. He’d retrieved a couple books and paper from his ‘forbidden’ closet and laid them out on the coffee table. It didn’t take him long to get seated and start writing. His dip pen moving gracefully across the parchment. His expression solemn.

She had wanted to ask about what he was writing but she was too nervous.

She quickly looked away, facing the book in her hands.

She usually sat on the couch when she read but he was in her spot. There was enough room for her to sit on the other end of the couch but… he was right there.

I’ll just sit at the dining table. Wait—that’s too obvious… he’ll know I’m avoiding him.

She swallowed. It wasn’t like she wanted to avoid him. She just didn’t know how to be around him anymore, not after their kiss—or, kisses.

Just sit on the damn couch, fool.

She turned, pretending to be nonchalant as she flipped to her bookmarked page while heading towards the unoccupied end of the couch. Unaware that Levi was watching her the whole time.

She sat down, letting her half-raised legs occupy the space between them. Her bent knees being the stand for her book—and also blocking him front sight.

Suddenly a hand was at her calves and she was being pulled.

She yelped when she looked to see her legs had been thrown over one of his spread ones. His arm rested over her knees.

His sharp gray eyes examined her, “Why’re you so far.”

She blinked, coming up with something on spot, “Uh.. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

His eyes narrowed, “Tch. Don’t be stupid.”

She opened her mouth and then closed it. At least, one of them wasn’t having physicality problems.

He ran a hand over her knees before leaning forward again. He resumed writing on the paper before him.

She bit at her lower lip before readjusting herself slightly, letting her legs rest over his thigh at a more comfortable angle—with her back resting against the couch’s backrest.

She was still so close to him. Her stomach swam with butterflies—God, why am I so nervous?

She felt like such a kid.

She peered at him. He seemed comfortable hunched over, writing away. Continuously glancing back at one of his reference books as he wrote.

If he’s fine, I can be fine. She convinced herself.

She glanced down at the book before her, forcing herself to focus on the words on the page.

Once she finally managed to immerse herself in reading. She felt him run a hand down her leg and immediately glanced up.

“I can’t concentrate if you're gonna keep bouncing your leg like that.”

She immediately stilled. Shaking her leg was one of those unconscious tics of hers—usually happened when she was nervous.

His head was turned, facing her. He appeared to be assessing her.

“You’re nervous.”

“No.” she responded instinctively.

He was quiet for a moment before reaching out and touching her cheek.

“This pink face is telling me otherwise.”

He leaned towards her and pressed a kiss to her lips. It was sweet, slow and gentle. The type of kiss to leave you feeling warm all over.

When he pulled away, her hand impulsively held onto his collar.

Suddenly his hands were on her, easily pulling her onto his lap—making her straddle him.

Her eyes were wide when she saw him directly before her.

He was so handsome up-close it was almost criminal. His stunning, narrow, dark-gray eyes were almost impossible to look away from. His lengthy dark lashes only enhanced their shape. The contrast of his jet black hair against his pale skin suited him so much it was almost unfair. There was nothing on his face that wasn’t cohesive—even the darkness underneath his eyes.

She wanted to sigh. Only he could make tiredness attractive.

In her distraction she didn’t notice that she wasn’t the only one perusing the other.

His hands on her hips twitched.

“I’ve escaped death many times but you’re actually gonna kill me.”

When a small, shy smile made it across her lips his eyes narrowed.

“I’m certain of it.” he added.

A light laugh escaped her. She kept her voice low to hide her nervousness, “Don’t you have work to do..”

“I do,” he muttered, “but I can’t focus.”

His lips were on her in an instant—devouring her. Leaving no room for hesitation-not that she would anyway because the second his mouth met hers her stomach erupted in butterflies. The feeling was euphoric.

She didn’t know how she was going to survive if his kisses kept doing this to her.

His hand slid down her hip to her thigh—squeezing tightly as he resisted the urge to seat her directly over his groin. She was so close. Mere inches away but he had to restrain himself—had to be patient with her.

His thighs flexed underneath her ass.

His other hand tightened around her nape, keeping her close as they kissed each other eagerly. Her chest pressing into him as she held his collar. The pressure of her passion making him fall back into the couch’s backrest.

She broke the kiss, suddenly red. 

She wasn’t the only one flushed. A few buttons below his collar had gotten undone—revealing a hint of his pale chest. The peek at his chest line below his collar bone made an image of his shirtless body flash within her mind. To think that his firm chest and compact abs lay just below her hands, hidden by his thin dress-shirt… her body temperature went several times higher.

Despite this, she still couldn’t ignore the zip of fear bouncing within the back of her mind.

His neck seemed constrained, bringing attention to the thick lines and subtle adams apple underneath his skin. He stared at her-eyes searching-before using his hand at her nape to gently pull her into him again.

His lips dominated hers once more—leaving her body tingling and giddy with butterflies. But as her hands slid down his chest to his taut abdomen she realized she could feel it.. the tension coiled within his skin. The heat in his hand gripping her thigh. His hand gripping and releasing her hair at her nape… he was restraining himself.

The idea of him having more passion to give..

Suddenly a flare of warmth burned at her core and the jolt of fear floating within the back of her mind began to ricochet—all at once.

She broke the kiss, overwhelmed to another degree.

Her fingertips went to his lips as she blurted-breathlessly, “I can’t—I can't think straight.”

He was quiet for a moment before saying, “You think I can?” The words gruff on his lips.

She looked down, letting her hand drop from his lips. She kept her eyes on her hands over his firm abdomen, taking a moment to catch her breath.

He stared at her, silently. His hand at her neck moving ever-so-gently to her face. His fingertips skimmed her jaw before going lower to her neck. His thumb slipping underneath the rim of his plain long sleeve shirt that she wore. He touched her like he was scared she would break.

“I’m-” his voice cracked and he swallowed, “I’m leaving again tomorrow.”

Her eyes immediately latched onto his.

“Have to help deal with the bodies.” he clarified mutedly.

She shivered. That statement in itself was rather morbid.

“How long will you be away?”

He twirled a strand of her hair around his finger, “Not sure. I want to say tomorrow evening but it’ll probably be a couple days. Erwin mentioned having some sort of commemoration for the fallen soldiers but… I’m not sure how he wants to go about that.”

He sighed, letting his hand drop to watch her hair unravel around his finger.

“I should probably go back tonight.” he muttered.

“To Scout HQ?”

He nodded.

“Why?” She’d kind of hoped he’d stay the night here—his presence always brought an added sense of security.

“Have to speak to Erwin. The mission failed and our next expedition relied on this one so now we got to figure out what the fuck to tell the Government.”

A scowl appeared on his lips as he spoke bitterly, “MPs are gonna have a fuckin’ field day with this.”

She bit her lower lip. This was the most he’d ever spoken about his job and she was more than curious to know the details.

“What are you guys going to do now?” she asked, worriedly.

He ran a hand through his black hair, “Don’t know. Erwin’s always got some shit up his sleeve so I'm assuming he has a plan.”

His brows furrowed as he added, “He always does.”

“Isn’t he going to sleep?” she asked, in reference to Erwin.

“Doubt it. If we’re all up and there he’ll call a Squad Leader meeting when he wants.”

“Wow.” she murmured, genuinely surprised.

“He doesn’t like to waste time.”

“Sounds like.. a proper leader to me.” she noted in a low murmur.

Sure, it definitely must be taxing on the team leaders but time efficiency was a quality that was necessary in areas of leadership. Especially in the Military.

Shadis would always drill into their heads that learning to think on your feet wasn't a trait that could be taught—but rather one you had to refine. 

You always had to have a plan. And a back up plan. And if you were smart-according to Shadis-you’d even have a backup plan for the backup plan.

“Tch. There you go again.” He’d nearly forgotten about her unwarranted admiration for Erwin.

Even if he knew it wasn’t entirely misplaced it still agitated him to hear her say it.

She suddenly grabbed his collar, “You better get some sleep after the meeting. I don’t care if it’s only a couple hours—get. some. sleep.”

The darkness underneath his eyes truly was concerning her.

A subtle smile tugged at his lips. His hand slipped up her wrist, before letting his fingertips twist her engagement ring.

“Acting like my wife already, hm?”

She felt her cheeks burn.

“I like it.” he continued.

Her grip on his collar tightened-doing her best to ignore the feeling his words caused as she insisted, “I’m serious, Levi. Promise me you’ll try?”

He looked worn, “I can promise but there’s no guarantee sleep’ll actually come to me.”

Her eyes widened as she remembered, “I have chamomile tea! I bought some before you left but the store owner said it’s supposed to help you sleep. You should take some with you.”

His brows furrowed as he deliberated, “I suppose… I could.”

He raised a brow, “You bought that for me?”

She looked awry-suddenly abashed, “Um-well, you said I had to restock your tea so..”

“I drink black tea.”

“Bah! I know I just—your dark circles worry me, okay?” she spat out, completely flustered.

He smiled. Even if the smile was just a bit wider than his usual ones—even if the smile had a bit of sadness to it, she was absolutely star-struck.

It suited him so much.. she was certain she would’ve fallen if she was standing.

He leaned forward and kissed her. A light peck that left her yearning for another.

“Don’t worry about me.” he murmured against her lips, before pressing another kiss to her lips. This kiss a bit longer—more greedy.

It was hard not to be greedy with her, when all he did was want to consume her whole. Her little breathless sounds only making it worse. He wanted to hear more—feel more.

He pulled away before his lust caught up to him.

“You have work tomorrow?”

She nodded.

He ran a hand down her hair, “You should sleep.”

“I’ll sleep when you go.”

His expression turned pained, “Don’t.”

Her brows furrowed, “Why?”

He closed his eyes, “Because I-“

He swallowed before speaking quieter than usual, “I won’t be able to go.”

Her eyes softened, “Levi-“

“Just this once.”

At her silence, he opened his eyes, “Please.”

She was frowning, “I.. I don’t like this.”

He pressed his forehead to hers, his voice a low growl, “I know.”

His hands at her waist squeezed—his voice strained, “W-when I let you go, I need you to get up and go to your room. Don’t stop, don’t speak and don’t look back.”

His eyes searched her face, “Alright?”

She didn’t meet his eyes.

“Devon.”

Her hands at his collar moved slightly but she still didn’t meet his eyes.

“Devon.” he spoke through gritted teeth.

She met his eyes.

“Can you do that for me?”

She looked away again, her voice low, “Y-yes.” 

His lips encapsulated her in a bone crushing kiss. Stealing her breath and securing her heart with steel wiring. She was a complete goner.

His lips pried hers open, kissing her deep as he tilted his head. His hands sliding into her hair and around her lower back—nearly drawing her close but he refused the burning urge. It’d bring her lower region too close to his own.

His lips lit up every square inch of her body—the feeling heedy and addicting. She couldn’t get enough. There could never be enough.

She gripped his collar like her life depended on it.

He pried himself away from her—nearly yanking himself into the couch’s backrest so he could get at least some distance between them.

He had to stop.

He stared at her breathless form before him. The sight so damn appealing he nearly lost all control then and there. His dick so hard it hurt.

His hands squeezed her waist once more.

“Sleep well, baby.” his low voice rough.

And before she could respond, he released her waist.

She froze, suddenly tense. Her heart already aching.

She swallowed, not meeting his eyes as she let go of his collar. Her hands sliding down his chest as she hoisted herself off of him.

She stumbled slightly when she stood up—completely disoriented from his mind numbing kiss. She couldn’t believe how excruciating this felt, stepping away from him. Each step she took more painful than the one prior.

Just a couple days. Just a couple days. She kept trying to tell herself.

But it was too long. Too long.

He'd been away for longer-much longer-and she knew that but.. it was different now. Who knew how much a little skinship could change things..

She stopped right before her door, her hand trembling over the doorknob.

I want to look at him.

She squeezed her eyes shut—refusing to listen to that little voice. If she could make this as easy for him as possible, she would be happy.

I’ll see him in a couple days. A few days! C’mon you got this. She tried to convince herself.

‘Sleep well, baby.’ His words echoed in her mind.

Her belly warmed with butterflies.

Why’d he have to say it like that?

She managed to open her eyes and open her door. She quickly stepped inside and shut it behind her.

Levi stared after her, his brows drawn in distress. Once she slipped into her room, he lay back against the couch. His head resting on the backrest as he stared up at the ceiling.

He already missed the feeling of her warm body on his legs. Her little needy hands at his collar. Her swollen lips against his.

How am I gonna survive a couple days?

His hands twitched at his sides. He was more grateful than she knew that she complied. He truly wouldn’t be able to go if she hadn’t left first.

He needed that and she knew it. She was always too good to him.

How'd I get so lucky?

He swallowed hard before glancing back at her bedroom door. Everything he craved was behind that shitty, wooden door.

His hands tightened into fists at his sides.

I’ll be back. He promised.

It was a thirty minute walk and with her legs she could make it twenty but this cold weather was not making it easy for her. She was feeling every stinkin’ minute of her walk.

She wrapped her scarf tighter around her neck, already missing the ferocious sunlight they’d had yesterday. Fall weather always gave her whiplash.

She gripped her knotted cloth bag tightly as she attempted to warm her hands by rubbing them together.

She hadn’t even meant to take this route back home but she guesstimated that it might be a couple minutes shorter than the route she’d taken to get here.

She’d had a short, early shift at the bookstore today. She’d helped unload the new book delivery so Larsa thought she ought to go home early, despite Devon being the least bit tired.

But she didn’t mind the free time. In fact, she decided to go to a nearby town to check out the tea shop she’d heard about. Levi’s tea was running low-since she was starting to use it-and she wouldn’t mind checking out other types of tea as well.

To her surprise, she’d found the tea shop quite easily. The first person she asked knew exactly what tea shop she was talking about. The store itself was nice as well. She bought Levi’s typical black tea, as well as hibiscus and chamomile tea for her and Levi to try. Chamomile tea supposedly had sleeping benefits so she was especially eager to get Levi to try that.

She suddenly became highly aware that she was the only one walking on this wide road. There was a big brick building on one side of the road and a fence on the other. She was walking alongside the fence.

At first glance, there wasn’t much to see beyond the fence. Just tall, dull green grass but the longer she looked she realized there was a stone gray building further beyond. There was another fence that closely bordered the building.

She belatedly realized that it was a jail. And someone was yelling within it—very loudly. And oddly enough, the voice sounded familiar.

She peered through the fence further, trying to find where the voice originated from only to freeze when she found its source.

There was a broad male, wrapped up in bandages and strapped to a wheelchair. He was wailing like a maniac. He seemed to be avidly struggling against something, it seemed his wheelchair had restraints.

“Let me go! I don’t fuckin’ wanna go back inside! Fuck this! I hate, hate, HATE it here! Fuck!”

His handler shoved his wheelchair forward, “Mr. Bass! Calm down. You’ll have outside time again tomorrow, alright? It’s just too cold right now.”

“Fuck this!” He cried out again, struggling in his chair twice as hard.

A few guards ran over to assist the handler since the wheelchair nearly tipped over.

Mr. Bass.. that name, that voice.. sounds so familiar.. Her blood ran cold.

Carter Bass.

The one and only bastard that had managed to beat her pulp and leave her bedridden for days up to rank day. She hadn’t seen him since the day of the physical assault.

She’d heard he was sent to jail but… seeing it was something else.

And yet.. she couldn’t find a drop of remorse within her body.

Instead a deep-rooted, dark sensation of satisfaction coursed through her as she watched him get escorted inside. His desperate cries went silent the second the jail’s doors slid shut.

She entered the apartment to see Levi doing the dishes. He glanced over his shoulder when she stepped further inside.

“Hey.” she greeted.

He watched her remove her outerwear for a moment before facing the dishes once more.

“Hey.” he responded.

As she hung up her scarf and cloak, he asked, “Short shift?”

“Yeah.”

She seated herself at the dining table with a huff, hastily setting her bag down before her.

She held out her arms-stretching them out-before settling in her seat. Her hand held up her chin as she leaned on her elbows—watching him.

As much as she internally complained about him always being in uniform, it never failed to make her feel some type of way whenever she saw him in it. The simple faded gray dress-shirt, white ascot tie and long dark brown boots. It suited him so well, she couldn’t help but admire him.

It didn’t help that his rolled up sleeves showcased the veins running down his forearms whenever he placed the dishes onto the dish rack. Or that the window above the sink seemed to cast a faint glow over his dark hair.

“You came for lunch?” she inquired.

He nodded, “Yeah, I gotta go back in a bit.”

He then added, almost as an afterthought, “Finished your leftovers.”

She smiled a bit, “That’s good.”

She leaned back in her seat, her arms slowly slipping around herself as she let herself get lost in her head for a moment. The sound of the dishes calming to her ears, allowing her to relax—or at least that’s what she thought. Nothing to do with the 5’3” male being near.

She absentmindedly chewed at her bottom lip before glancing at him.

“Guess who I saw today.”

“Who.”

“Carter.”

The sound of running water in the sink abruptly vanished and he was facing her, “What?”

Something about the look in his eyes felt downright murderous.

She struggled to find her words, “N-no, I mean-don’t worry. It was on my way back from Pennsforth, I went there after work for some shopping but-I passed the jail. I hadn’t meant to take that route but I thought it would be shorter than the local one so.. I saw him. I saw him through the fence around the jail, he was getting pushed around in a wheelchair.”

She fiddled with her shirt-sleeves anxiously, “I guess he can’t walk now.. I wonder how that happened.”

There was a moment’s pause before he muttered, “I wonder.”

She watched him resume completing the dishes with growing uncertainty. Normally his terse words would’ve been easy to brush off but.. there was something off about it. His tone was too crisp, as if mad. In fact, he sounded livid.

He was even washing the dishes with a different vigor.

Her mind suddenly wandered back to the day she’d awoken in the Infirmary—after getting beat up by Carter. She briefly remembered Monty telling her that Carter was crippled now, and-oddly enough-Keith had unpromptedly asked her if she was close with Captain Levi.

She hadn’t gotten the chance to answer his question because Imada had interrupted.

But.. Imada had also asked her about her and Captain Levi’s relationship that day. She never told her why she asked.

How could it be that two of my friends asked me about him the same day—when they’ve never questioned me about him before?

There had to be some common denominator she was missing.

A memory suddenly flashed before her mind—the memory of when Levi returned her pocket knife to her in the Infirmary. She had seen his hand that day, it’d been completely marked up. His knuckles had been chafed and bruised in a way that didn’t happen unless..

Her eyes widened in realization.

Maybe Keith asking wasn’t so unprompted after all.

“It was you.” her voice came out unsteady.

Despite his back being to her, she caught him momentarily freeze.

“It was you, wasn’t it? You broke his legs?”

He turned off the sink, keeping his back to her as he placed the last dish onto the rack. He placed his hands on the edge of the counter, letting his head fall downward slightly as he kept his eyes trained to the window before him.

“Do you think I was wrong.” His voice devoid of emotion.

She stared at his back, the outline of his defined shoulders becoming more prominent within his shirt. He was tense.

She stood up so fast that her chair skidded back.

She didn’t think when she wrapped her arms around his torso, pressing her face to his firm back. Her eyes squeezed shut as she held in a sob.

“Thank you.” she whispered.

I wish I met you sooner.

He was still as her arms tightened around him. Emotion racked through her body and she harshly bit into her lower lip as result–refusing to cry.

If I met you in the Underground, would you have protected me the same?

There’d been so many times in the Underground where she’d been scared senseless–no one to rely on but herself. It’d been so, so hard.

There’d been so many times where she’d cried herself to sleep, wishing that there was someone-anyone-to help her. Someone strong enough to stop her pursuers from coming after her again and again. She just wanted the thugs to stop. She just wanted to stop running.

Then, she just wanted everything to stop.

If she didn’t exist, then her problems would cease to exist. The thugs, the hunger and the pain of hopeless memories. She wouldn’t have to run anymore.

But it was those thoughts. Those dark, wicked thoughts that eventually gave her confidence. If she died, then those disgusting thugs would win. She’d be another innocent lost to the darkness. Food for the rats.

If no one was coming to save her, then so be it. She’d become strong enough to save herself.

The day she made that resolve had been the day she disassociated from being a kid. Her weakness became her strength. Being small, frail and alone meant being invisible. She could use that to her advantage.

And she did, the day she snuck onto a cart going aboveground.

Meeting Kate aboveground had gradually allowed her to feel like a kid again. Kate had made her realize that not all humans were bad–but that thought quickly sunk when she died. The day Kate died, the dark thoughts came back with a renewed vigor. She was back at square one.

She vowed to never rely on anyone again. To be her only protector.

And to avenge Kate.

Her walls had been sky high when she joined the training corps. She’d given everyone the cold shoulder–everyone but Imada. Imada’s weird persistence at hanging out with her had forced her to gradually change. It wasn’t like Imada was super nice to her or anything, she simply saw through Devon. She saw through all the pain, hurt and hate.

It became harder and harder for Devon to ignore someone who hadn’t done anything wrong to her. Then before she knew it, Keith started to stick around and then Monty. Despite being one of the first ‘ones’ in their group, she’d been the last to open up. But even in her friendships, she never allowed herself to be too vulnerable. Always making sure that she was the one to be their shoulder to lean on, rarely letting it be the other way around.

But this… for the first time-in a long time-she didn’t have to be her own protector.

He avenged her.

She felt him stiffen in her arms and she immediately released him. A rush of embarrassment flooding through her when she realized what she’d just done.

She stepped back, “S-sorry.” her voice came out small.

She faced sideways when she felt him turn around. She quickly blinked several times, fighting the tears that were on the verge of slipping down her face.

Just as she raised her hand to check for tears, he caught her wrist.

He pulled her against him–easily doing so by winding his free arm around her waist. His hand on her wrist slid up her forearm, past her elbow to her shoulder before settling on the crown of her head to draw her closer.

She let out a short gasp before melting into him when she inhaled his clean, eucalyptus scent. Something about it so oddly reassuring that she didn’t get the chance to become hyper aware of their closeness just yet.

She twisted her face into his chest, her head fitting perfectly into the space underneath his chin. His presence was so strong, so calming—her heart tugged some more when she realized it was this feeling. This feeling her mind and body had been chasing after unknowingly.

This feeling of safety… the feeling of not being alone.

His fingers slowly ran down the length of her hair before pausing when he felt something wet touch his skin. He glanced down to see a couple tears streaming down her face.

“What’s wrong?” he murmured.

She hesitated, seconds passing as she deliberated.

His voice grew stern, “Tell me.”

She turned her face further into him and his arm around her waist tightened.

“Tell me.”

“It’s embarrassing.” she mumbled.

He exhaled, “Even better.”

She let out a small laugh, “Now I’m never gonna tell you.”

His hand stroking her hair suddenly went around her shoulders–pressing her front closer into his chest.

He muttered into her temple, “If you don’t tell me I’ll never let you go.”

His words felt like an electric current to her body and she suddenly became highly aware of their proximity. This had to be the most she’s ever touched him at once. Her heart rate picked up.

Suddenly someone knocked rather loudly at the front door and she jolted apart from him.

She saw his jaw clench as he eyed the door warily.

“Go to your room.”

She complied-walking swiftly into her room and closing the door behind her. She waited a moment before pressing her ear to the door to hear the front door close.

She popped her head from her room, “Who was it?”

He threw the newspaper onto the coffee table, “The newspaper boy. I told the brat he doesn’t need to knock, he can just slip the damn thing under the door.”

She laughed, “I told you his knock is startling.”

Levi glanced down at his pocket watch before looking at her. Something in his countenance was different than before.

“Devon, there’s something I need to tell you.”

She blinked, suddenly alert. “Yes?”

“I.. I’m leaving tomorrow, for another mission,” His voice felt empty, “We’re set to leave at dawn.”

His statement shouldn’t have hit her the way it did. She knew she’d indirectly told him that she would appreciate a warning before he left but... this felt.. harsher somehow.

“It was decided this morning.” his voice was hollow.

She was speechless. Her arms suddenly felt weak at her sides.

It was too soon…

“Hey.”

Her head jerked up to see that he stood closer now. A mere few inches separating them–now an inch less since he’d just taken another step towards her.

“I’m still gonna come tonight–to your little bookstore thing. Might be a bit late but.. I’m still gonna make it, alright?”

His dark gray eyes were tentative as he scanned her face. All she needed to do was hold his gaze for longer than a millisecond to see she wasn’t the only one torn apart by the news–but she couldn’t.

She looked down. He saw her collarbones protrude as she swallowed hard.

“Alright.” she choked out.

His hand twitched at his side.

“I.. must go now.” his deep voice murmured aloud–trying to remind himself but he was stuck in a trance. He couldn’t pry his eyes off of her.

Just as he was about to take another step towards her, her head snapped up. Her eyes were narrow as she met his gaze.

“You have to come tonight.” she demanded.

The end of his lip tipped up a miniscule, “Yes ma’am.”

Before she had the chance to stare in awe, he turned around. He briskly grabbed his scout regiment jacket off the chair before slipping out the front door.

She shouldn’t have done that. That being drinking as much alcohol as she did—especially considering it was her first time drinking.

It’d been the first thing she did once she entered the bookstore. Larsa had been offering a glass to everyone on entry and she’d taken the glass without a second's hesitance.

At first, Devon hoped it would take the edge off. But then she kept drinking more… and more… and more.

Because she kept thinking of him.

And thinking of him made her sad. She couldn’t be sad at this event now, could she?! It was time for celebration—so many sales, yearly goal made, yada yada yada—woohoo! Hurrah! Celebration time!

No time to be sad—absolutely none.

She was silently laughing to herself when someone lightly touched her back.

She swiveled around to see Jack looking down at her with concern.

“You good?” he asked.

She smiled brightly, “I’m perfect.”

She tilted her head, “Did I mention that your hair looks great like that?”

He’d gelled his hair back for the event, leaving two strands to dangle handsomely over his forehead.

His brows furrowed, “Yeah, like twice.”

Shit. I need to reel it in.

Her smile dampened slightly before she subtly shook her head. She straightened, turning her head to glance around the room.

Larsa had cleared one area of the bookstore and moved all the desks into long tables. She’d lit every candle in the bookstore and more—to make the store as brightly lit as possible. She’d pinned a large red blanket to one wall to make it the background for her makeshift ‘stage’. At the center of the stage resided a violinist, playing the most tasteful tune.

The violinist was a relative of Larsa’s; she'd sent him to the stage after her speech. She was nowhere to be seen now-probably off somewhere organizing the food arrangements-leaving everyone to converse animatedly in the meantime.

She smiled once more, “Larsa’s speech was really good, wasn’t it?”

Jack swallowed, not used to seeing her rather knee-weakening smile this often, “Uh—yes, it was good, great even, b-but w-why are you-“

He flushed when he realized he was stammering horribly.

“Why am I what?” she gently prompted him to finish.

He adjusted his tie, not meeting her eyes, “Nothing, nothing.”

She didn’t think too much of it, instead raising her wine glass to his.

“Cheers?”

He withdrew his glass, “To what?”

She shrugged, “A good life?”

He tilted his head, a playful smile on his lips, “That’s too vague.”

She tapped her finger on the glass, “Hmm.. cheers to not… missing those who we care about too much.”

He assessed her carefully, “Hm, I’ll take it.”

They raised their glasses simultaneously, hitting each other's glass with a satisfying ‘clink’.

She took a sip before tilting her head back to down it all—only for her wrist to get caught in a firm grip.

She glanced up to see Jack holding her arm.

“Wait—how many glasses have you had?” he asked.

She offered him a shy smile before laughing. She used her free hand to pluck the drink from her restrained hand.

“That’s a secret, but if you're worried I’ll only take one more sip.”

His eyes widened as she did as promised.

He released her wrist, “Devon.” he reprimanded, “Isn’t it your first time drinking?”

She set the glass down on a nearby counter. She wiped her lips with the back of her hand, holding in her unreasonable laughter all the while.

“I don’t know.” she said, before walking off.

Just as she decided she would make rounds through the tables, Iris called out her name.

She spun around to see Iris walking arm and arm with a taller male. Iris was beaming.

“Devon! I love your dress.”

Devon glanced down at her dress-forgetting what it looked like for a second-before offering Iris a blazing smile, “Thank you!”

Iris giggled before glancing towards the male beside her, “Devon, there’s someone I want you to meet. This is my husband, Edmund.”

Devon glanced up to look at him. Edmund was blonde, with kind brown eyes. He wore a simple green dress-shirt, buttoned up to the collar and light brown pants. He offered her a small smile, before looking back at his wife.

“Ah, Devon—the most recent hire, right?”

Iris tugged at their intertwined arms, “Yes, I’ve mentioned her several times before–don’t you pay attention when I talk?” she whined.

“Yes yes, I promise I do. I was just clarifying.”

Iris released his arm and crossed her own.

He turned towards her, easily looping his arm back through hers.

“What do you think you’re doing?” He teased her.

She continued to pout, “You don’t listen when I talk!”

“I do listen!” He insisted.

Devon quickly held out her hands, laughing at the scene before her.

“Please, please, it’s no big deal—truly. You guys make quite the entertaining pair.”

Iris blushed while Edmund chuckled, “Thank you, Devon.”

“You're welcome.” she said, before sending the couple off with a warm smile and a lame excuse of having to use the restroom.

She slowly made her way to the bathroom, only to end up stopping in front of the violinist. She watched him from aside, slipping her arms around herself as she let herself get lost into its magnetic tune.

The young teen performing caught her gaze and nodded in appreciation. Before she could do anything to return his gratitude the nerves in her body thrummed to life.

“Devon.”

She froze. Goosebumps arose on her skin as she turned on her heel.

There he was.

His dark hair in its typical style, a neat black undercut. A few dark strands framing his forehead as usual. He wore a simple suit. The matching black jacket and dress-pants fit him well, subtly enhancing his slim yet lean frame. The suit jacket was left open, revealing his white dress-shirt and the ascot attached to its collar.

“Levi.” she breathed out.

His sharp gray eyes never left hers, “Don’t look so stunned. I told you I was coming, didn’t I.”

“I know b-but I’ve never seen you in a suit.”

He glanced down at himself before looking back at her, “It can’t be that different.” he muttered.

He looked at her expression a moment longer, then added, “Is it?”

She nodded.

He watched her curiously, “Hm.”

“You look good, Levi.” The words left her lips in the most casual tone.

The remnants of her sober self screamed within her mind. She’d never complimented him outright like that before–and she probably never would’ve without liquid courage in her veins.

He blushed—hard.

He sharply turned his head away, “Tch, you can’t be serious.”

Her brows furrowed, “Why not?”

He met her gaze with bitterness, “Do you see yourself right now—“

Before she could question his words, Piper appeared before them.

“Hi again.” Piper greeted them.

Piper had left her ginger hair down-for once-and wore a lovely lilac purple dress. They’d already spoken earlier in the event but the male who followed closely behind her—she had yet to meet him.

Piper glanced Levi’s way, “It’s good to see you again.”

“I hope you mean that.”

Devon’s eyes widened as she shot Levi a look.

Did he just try to make a joke?

His expression was still as stony as ever.

Piper let out a short laugh, “Of course! All is in the past. I just wasn’t sure if you’d make it.”

“Anything for my fiancé.”

She swallowed, forcing herself to act natural by smiling at his response instead of turning her head to stare at him.

“I see you finally bought her a ring.” Piper commented.

He nodded, “Looks stunning on her, doesn’t it.”

That simple comment shouldn’t have made her heart leap the way it did. She blamed it on the drinks in her system.

“It does.” Piper agreed, a small smile on her lips.

She glanced at the curly, brown haired male to her right before facing them once more.

“Devon, Levi, this is my husband. James.”

James smiled—exposing his perfect teeth and dimples as he reached out to shake Devon’s hand.

“Good to meet you, Devon.”

She returned his hand shake with a firm one of her own.

“You as well.” she returned his smile.

He then reached out to shake Levi’s hand and Levi shook it. She could already imagine Levi planning his next bathroom visit to wash his hands.

“Levi,” James spoke a bit too giddily, “I truly have so much respect for you, sir—for fighting for humanity the way you do.”

Suddenly her eyes widened when she realized that she hadn’t told Levi that everyone at her job knew about him–who he was. He hadn’t ever explicitly asked her to hide his career from others or anything but she knew he hated the attention that came from it, so she tried to keep it to herself as long as she could.

James continued, “You ought to get more recognition for what you do out ther–”

Levi cut him off with a crisp, “Recognition does nothing for me.”

He cut Devon a side glance before adding-a bit quietly, “But thanks.”

James let out an awkward laugh, “Of course. I can’t believe I got the chance to meet you anyway.”

Saving Levi from having to respond, Devon jumped in, “It’s nice for us to get to meet you as well! I’ve always wanted to see what Piper’s husband looked like.”

James chuckled, “Ha, really? Does she talk about me that much?”

Piper squinted, “You wish.”

Devon laughed before continuing on with a bit of small talk. After a moment of light conversation, Piper and James dismissed themselves to greet others since-like Levi-James had arrived late.

Once it was just them, she quickly turned to face him, “Sorry, I should’ve told you earlier. It completely slipped my mind but they know now–my coworkers know about your job.”

“It’s fine,” he muttered flatly. “When did you tell them?”

“I didn’t. Larsa already knew, so she brought it up in front of them all the day I thought I was fired.”

She absentmindedly twisted the ring on her finger, “Larsa's husband was a Scout so.. I guess she keeps up with those kinds of things.”

He didn’t miss her use of ‘was’ in that statement.

He was quiet for a moment before asking flatly–without a hint of doubt, “Piper’s husband is a lawyer, isn’t he.”

Her eyes widened in astonishment, “Y-yes, how did you know?”

“Only lawyers shake hands with people like that.”

“And how do you know that?” she pried lightheartedly.

“Been around too many people.”

“And yet you still don’t have any social skills.” she teased in a sing-song tone.

His eyes narrowed further, “Tch. Yours aren’t that great either. You only get away with it cuz you smile too much.”

She laughed, “Maybe you should try it sometime.”

“Hell no.”

Her and Levi had gotten separated when Larsa asked her to help set up the table.

She carefully set down the big pot of stew before glancing over her shoulder to check on Levi. He was half sitting, half-leaning against a smaller bookshelf with his arms crossed–looking as moody as can be. He turned his head to see Jack approaching him.

If she thought he looked moody before, it looked a lot worse now. Funnily enough, despite Levi having to look up at Jack–Jack seemed to grow nervous under his stare.

Devon smirked as she watched the two exchange a few words–dying to know exactly what they were talking about until she felt a firm finger on her chin redirect her to face Larsa beside her.

Larsa released her chin, “He can fend for himself. Now go get me napkins from the pantry.”

Devon blushed, “Okay, okay.”

Larsa shook her head as she watched Devon quickly scurry away.

Devon squatted before the shelf, careful not to let her dress touch the dusty floor as she checked the bottom shelf of the pantry.

“Don’t see it.” she muttered to herself.

She stood upright–it seemed she’d done so a little too fast because her head was spinning. She swallowed, her hand going to her temple as she blinked several times–trying to get her eyesight to focus.

Once she regained her focus, she gave the pantry one last scan before stepping out. She froze when she saw Levi walking towards her from the other end of the hallway, his gray eyes locking onto her the second she stepped out. It seemed he’d followed her.

He stood before her in seconds.

His dark gray eyes grew wary as he searched her face, “You–”

“Thank god you're here.” she muttered, unaware that she’d interrupted him.

She hastily ran a hand through her locks, “I can’t find the napkins in the pantry, can you help me?”

He eyed her for a moment. She looked awfully stressed for something as simple as napkins but he went with it.

“Sure.”

He walked past her into the pantry and she quickly followed him inside. He glanced around, meticulously looking through each row the same way she had when she didn’t find them at first glance.

He moved to look at the other shelf and she stepped back to give him some room–only to stumble into the pantry door and swiftly have it shut behind her. The locking mechanism within the door made an audible ‘click’ sound.

They both froze.

All the light in the pantry was gone since the open door provided them with light from the hallway.

“Shit.” Devon mumbled before blindly touching the door until she found the doorknob. She gave it a turn despite knowing the result would be useless.

“Shit, shit. shit.” she muttered.

She heard him exhale and she interpreted it as him sighing. A pang of guilt coursed through her.

“Sorry.”

“Devon–” you don’t have to apologize, is what he intended to say until he was cut off by the sound of her slamming her hand on the door several times.

“HELLO! ANYONE HERE!!! WE’RE STUCK IN HERE!! HELP PLEASE!!” she yelled out.

She knew the bathroom was nearby so maybe someone in the bathroom could help them.

She glanced over her shoulder to address Levi, though she couldn’t see him through the complete darkness.

“You think they’ll hear me if I keep yelling?” she asked.

“Not over that violin.”

Her eyes widened, she’d completely forgotten about that.

“Damn.” she muttered, defeatedly.

A moment of silence ensued. She kept her eyes glued to the narrow space under the door–only a crack of light spilling through.

“I can kick it open.” his deep voice sounded tense, “You just have to back u-”

Her brows sky-rocketed as she turned around, “N-no.” Did he want to get out that badly?

“That won’t be necessary,” she continued, “Larsa knows I’m here so if I don’t come back soon she’s gonna check on me.”

The only response she got was a faint grumble.

Silence followed for a moment after–making the air grow thicker by the second. Making it hard for her to breathe. She swallowed hard, trying to bring moisture to her dry throat but the sound only seemed to echo in the dark. Her eyes still hadn’t adjusted to the darkness.

The darkness surrounding them only made her thoughts go a mile per minute. It reminded her of the days she’d simply close her eyes and think while laying in bed–in attempt to lull herself to sleep the day's sleep didn’t come as easily.

Those days didn’t happen as often now, but she knew they would come.

They always happened whenever Levi left.

The first few days after he’d leave she’d always twist and turn in bed, not knowing what was agitating her until pictures… mental images of him dying would gnaw at her mind. It was humorous at first, but then slowly she’d start to believe it. She’d convince herself that this was it. Her brain was giving her premonitions and that the last time she saw him would be the last she ever saw of him.

Sometimes when they got really bad, she’d have to sit up and catch her breath in order to stop an anxiety attack from occurring. But most of the time, she’d just convince herself. She’d convince herself that she was being ridiculous, that Levi didn’t earn his worldwide nickname of being the strongest soldier for fun. He was the smartest person she knew.

And yet, that didn’t stop the knot from forming within her stomach the second he’d told her he was leaving again. She thought him telling her beforehand would help–it was supposed to–but instead it was worse. Exponentially worse.

All the thoughts she’d irresponsibly relied on the alcohol to push away came crashing down on her. It was too dark for her to try focus on anything else. And the silence..

The silence was deafening–she couldn’t take it.

“I-I think about you, you know.” she blurted out, trying to keep her voice even but her heart was racing, “W-when you’re gone, I.. I get really worried.”

She shook her head, “I know I shouldn’t… I know I don’t need to, but.. I can’t help it.”

“Sometimes…” she drifted off-knowing he wouldn’t like her next words but she decided to tell him anyway. She had to–or at least her drunken mind felt like it did.

“Sometimes I wish I was a Scout so I could see what’s going on. I.. I think I’d be on your squad so… and if I was on your squad I’d do the same thing you do to me. I’d-I’d protect you.” she rambled.

“That’s a stupid reason to want to be a Scout.”

Her heart raged within her chest as he continued, “I don’t need someone to protect me.”

“You’re lying.” she responded impulsively. She was all too familiar with those words.

“Why would I lie.” his tone was clipped.

“B-because everyone needs someone–family, friends, a partner–everyone needs someone.” she insisted.

He was quiet for a moment, “And why is that.”

“Because… because having someone.. makes it better. It makes you feel better. It makes you feel less alone.”

“And what if it doesn’t make you feel better.” his tone was ice-cold, “What if it makes you feel worse? What if wanting that shitty ‘someone’ makes you act irrationally–makes you loose all fucking sense.”

His tone was full of spite, “What if it makes you wanna do shit you know you shouldn’t.”

His onslaught of demanding questions made her head spin as she tried to keep up. The hammering of her heartbeat only seemed to grow louder within her ears.

“I-I don’t understand. What.. what do you want to do?”

Suddenly his hand was on her waist–his grip unyielding as he backed her into the door. She gasped when the back of her head hit the door’s hard material, only to lose all focus when Levi’s forehead met hers. She suddenly wished she could see him.

His nose grazed hers. His ragged breaths traveled down her skin–making her shiver as she sensed his desperation. Just as he tilted his face into hers, he stopped.

“You’re–you’re drunk.” his voice was hoarse.

She was rendered speechless. Yes, it was true but–who cares about the raging headache, the cold-sweat, her scratchy throat, she just wanted–

“I can smell it on you.” he muttered, a hard edge to his words.

Before she could even try to speak–a sharp buzzing sound suddenly rang through her ears. Any shapes she thought she could make out in the dark became unfocused and her thoughts began to spin incoherently in her mind. It didn’t help that ever since her head connected with the door it’d been throbbing like a bitch. And her skin–her skin felt so goddamn hot.

But something within her was burning even hotter–in places that she hadn’t thought possible.

His chest was rigid underneath her shaky hands. His entire frame taut with tension as he struggled—struggled to restrain himself.

His hand at her waist gradually tightened–eventually grasping a fistful of her dress so tightly that the sound of its seams tearing apart could be heard over his haggard breathing.

The pain of his grip brought her back to life and she instinctively grabbed his arms.

“L-levi.” she gasped out, wincing so hard that her body jerked forward. She would’ve fallen if his forehead hadn’t been pressed against hers.

He immediately released her, staggering backwards a couple steps only to freeze when he heard the sound of her sliding down against the door.

He needed to get as far away from her as possible—so he could think straight, but she couldn’t even stand on her own right now.

He scoffed through his teeth before grabbing her arms and pulling her upright against the door. She flinched as her back scraped the wood. Her head was still spinning.

“What—you can’t stand straight now?” he hissed, his grip on her arms tightening momentarily.

She was too dizzy to speak so she nodded—inadvertently brushing her forehead against his.

He suddenly pressed his forehead to her temple, forcing her to face aside.

“You're so unfair.”

She shivered at the harshness of his low tone.

“You just had to drink, huh?”

He went on, “Is that why you were smiling so much? That why you complimented me?”

He spoke through gritted teeth, “That why you put on that fucking dress?”

Her breath hitched.

She froze when she felt his hand at her waist once more. His hand slowly sliding down her side, stopping at her hip—smoothing out the dress he’d nearly teared moments ago.

“I’m convinced… your seamstress is out to get me.” his deep voice completely out of breath.

Red. Red was the color she was wearing. It was the color her lips were painted and the color her cheeks kept turning whenever she glanced his way.

Suddenly her hands found his chest and she pushed at him weakly.

“Levi,” her voice was strained, “I-I don’t feel so good.”

Her quietly spoken words brought some of his sense to the surface. His arm slipped around her the second she fell into him. Her face in his neck.

“Where’s Larsa?” she asked faintly.

And almost as if on cue, the sound of the door unlocking was audible.

He kept her close against him as he stepped back, giving the door enough room to open. 

Larsa stood in the doorway, her eyes widening the instant she saw them.

“My lord! What happened?”

“We were looking for your damn napkins and got locked in here.”

His hand at the back of her head slid down to her nape, “I need to get her home. She drank too much.”

Levi ran his hands over his face before glancing back at her.

Devon lay on the bed. Her hair splayed out on the pillow behind her as she lay unconscious. Her red dress felt bright in the dimly lit room.

She’d passed out the second Larsa opened the pantry door.

He sat on the edge of the bed, a bucket at his feet in case she needed it. Lucky for him, she hadn’t vomited yet. He’d fully expected her to when he was carrying her home-but she hadn’t.

He stared at her, relief pouring into him as he noticed some color returning to her skin. Her breathing sounded almost normal.

His eyes easily drifted lower to her chest—the slow rise and fall of her breasts in sync with her breathing. The thin material of her dress only seemed to emphasize the natural action.

He threw the blanket over her.

He never wanted to see her in red again. The color was downright lethal on her. It was a safety hazard. It caught too much attention.

Like his own.

He heard her shift and he quickly turned towards her.

She placed her hand on his forearm, “Levi?” she asked, her voice hoarse.

He looked down at her. She was blinking several times as if in a daze.

Her brows furrowed, “Are you real?”

The corner of his lip lifted slightly, “Yes. I am real.”

She squeezed his arm as if to make sure.

“How do you feel?”

“Like trash.” she mumbled.

She closed her eyes and turned her face into the pillow. Her knees curled into her chest under the blanket-her hand falling from his arm in the process.

She looked sleepy.

He wondered if she would remember anything. The words he’d spoken in the dark. The idea made his face heat up.

He reached out and gently pushed her hair out of her face. He might’ve braided it for her if she was capable of sitting up but she looked too comfortable now.

“Devon, I’m gonna go now, alright.” he muttered—more to himself than her.

He ought to get to Scout headquarters soon.

Just as he moved to get up, a hand clasped one of his suit lapels.

He glanced over to see a sheen of panic in her sleepy eyes, “Y-your leaving?” she whispered.

He was quiet for a moment before nodding.

She attempted to sit up, her arms shaking as she struggled.

He placed a hand on her shoulder-urging her to lay back.

“It’s fine. Just sleep.”

“No-“ she croaked out.

He slipped his arm around her back, swiftly bringing her upright. Her breath hitched.

He could tell she was still a bit disoriented.

“What is it.”

“I have to tell you..” she stared at his shoulder.

“Hm?”

She blinked slowly several times, attempting to fight the sleep that was eager to keep her under.

“I’ll kill— kill you if you die.” she’d meant to threaten him but the words came out meek on her lips.

He chuckled. A handsome sound that made her insides melt into a puddle. If only she wasn’t so tired…

She placed her head on his chest, “I’m serious..” she murmured.

His hand smoothed down her hair, “I know.”

He smelled so good, so clean. She didn’t want him to go.

“There’s this tea shop…” she mumbled sleepily, “In Pennsforth I-I have to take you…when you come back.”

“Okay.” He didn’t tell her that he’d already been.

“They have a lot of stray cats..” she rambled.

“Mhm.” he continued to stroke her hair.

“Maybe we could get food..”

She was quiet for a long moment after that. Her mind easily succumbed to his familiar scent and relaxing touch. His warm presence magnetic to her comfort starved body.

He gently laid her down, tucking the blanket at her sides. He hoped-for her sake-that she didn’t feel too sick tomorrow.

He stood over her. His chest and shoulder aching from her lack of touch. He hadn’t been ready to pry her small, warm body away from himself.

His knuckles skimmed her cheekbone.

“I’ll be back,” he murmured, “I was promised a date after all.”

“Levi.” she greeted, her tone light and eager as she walked towards him.

When he turned around, she froze.

He didn’t meet her eyes. His posture stiffer than usual. An air of something indescribably heavy around him.

Something was wrong.

She took a step towards him. Uncertainty tainting her voice, “Levi? What’s wrong?”

She hadn’t expected their reunion to be like this.

When she stepped closer she was able to get a closer look into his downcast face. His eyes almost appeared lost, as if in a trance. Except it wasn’t a trance exactly because he seemed to be thinking about something. The subtle downturned curve of his lip revealed he was upset.

She stopped right before him. Her eyes filled with concern.

“Levi?”

She reached out to touch him and he caught her wrist.

“Tell me..” his voice was low.

Her eyes widened as she searched his eyes. They were unreadable, almost detached. The slight waver to his voice was the only thing she could go off of.

“Tell me you're done being a Scout.”

She blinked, the request catching her off-guard.

Her hand shifted slightly in his grasp.

“Levi, where is this coming from?” she asked.

He let go of her, his eyes latching onto the spot of her wrist that he’d grasped moments ago.

“Devon, I-“ his voice cracked and he shook his head.

“I won’t bury you.” his gravelly voice grew helpless, “I can’t—“

“I can’t lose you.”

Suddenly he was on his knees before her, his head bent low.

“I’m begging you—“ his low voice ragged.

Her eyes widened in shock.

“Please.” he pleaded, quietly. His dark hair covered his eyes as he faced downwards.

She quickly went down to her knees as well. She instinctively held onto his hands.

“Levi-Levi-that’s enough.”

Her eyes were filled with concern and bewilderment as she looked at him.

“I forgot to tell you last time I saw you. We were just so short on time–but I got into culinary school. It’s only part time since that’s all I can afford but I still get to work at the bookstore so I don’t mind.”

She felt his hand jolt in her own and she squeezed.

He raised his head slowly-as if in disbelief.

“You.. you got into culinary school?”

“Yes.”

“That’s what you want?”

“Yeah, you know I love cooking. I never thought to make a career of it until Iris made a joke about me being a professional chef but… I don’t know, it made me realize I could do more with myself. And my affinity for cooking.”

He stared at her, his dark gray eyes filled with so much. The complete opposite of the empty, detached eyes she’d seen moments ago.

“That truly what you want?” his monotone voice constricted—not daring to get too hopeful.

She appeared thoughtful for a second before nodding.

“Yes.” she confirmed.

Her hand absentmindedly squeezed his as she stared at a random spot on the floor—the words poured slowly from her lips, as if thinking out loud, “The idea of being a Scout was good for me. I needed that… at the time. I needed to deal with my hate for MPs and just-I don’t know, figure shit out. The training corps did that for me. Being a Scout was just the best option out of the three divisions to me.”

She continued, “I-I convinced myself that maybe Kate would approve of that career path-since she was so obsessed with a ‘world beyond the walls’ but I was just making excuses. I needed to feel like I was doing right by her despite not.. avenging her.”

She shook her head, “But Kate wouldn’t even want me to avenge her. She would just want me to be happy.”

“Cooking makes me happy.” she shrugged.

He stared at her in complete awe. The crash course of relief pouring within him completely nullifying the tumultuous worry swarming within him. He couldn’t believe it… she’d truly found another passion to pursue.

She blushed, raising her hand to cover his face as she turned away, “Stop looking at me.”

He caught her hand, tugging her onto his lap. The force of his tug made him sit on his ass and his legs outstretch before him. She sat in the space between his legs.

But before she had the chance to even register what was happening, his lips were on hers. Kissing her as if she were the only thing that ever mattered. The only thing he needed.

She tilted her head, accepting his passionate lips. A jolt of warmth catapulting within her body at his eager touch. Her heart ached.

God, I missed him.

It’d been a few days too many. She’d thought about their first few kisses too much. The memories flooded her mind any free time she got.

She shivered when his hands slid up her back. His hands were still cold from the outside air. It didn’t help that she was already sensitive to his touch.

He kissed her hard–as if he were trying to convey how much he felt for her through his lips. She held onto his triceps, the pressure of his lips making a slight breathy sound leave her lips.

He broke the kiss to stop himself from acting on impulse.

His gray eyes scanned her face. Her face was flushed. Her eyes hazy.

So fucking pretty.

His jaw locked. His hand on her back slowly fisting her shirt. Her shirt rose slightly, revealing a sliver of skin at her navel. His eyes dropped, drinking in the sight.

Everything was tempting him—all he needed to do was apply a bit of pressure and her shirt could easily be torn off, on the floor–

She squeezed his triceps before one of her hands slipped into his hair. Her fingers sliding up his undercut before stroking through his silky, dark strands.

Her touch was so gentle… it nearly made him feel guilty for his untamed thoughts.

Her face was unreadable, a subtle calm yet curious aura to her eyes. Her lips were parted slightly, still catching her breath from their lip lock moments prior.

He closed his eyes, trying to lose himself in the sensation of her fingers running through his hair. All the while, willing himself to calm down.

She gently pressed her lips to his cheek.

His eyes snapped open, wide.

Despite her face being red, she appeared indifferent.

Her fingers continued to stroke through his hair as she asked, calmly, “How did it go.. The commemoration for the soldiers?”

“It didn’t happen,” he said monotonously, “There weren’t enough funds to hold it.”

“Erwin just gave the soldiers time off and let us-the squad leaders-deal with the corpses. We gave the fallen soldiers with family nearby their bodies–or whatever remained of them. The others.. we buried and sent letters to their families.”

She swallowed. Her heart suddenly felt heavy. She wondered how many letters he wrote. How many he buried..

She looked at him to see him looking downwards, awry. Despite his expressionlessness, she was able to sense his despondence.

Before she could think to act on her urge to comfort him, he spoke.

“Your friends are still alive.”

She blinked, confused, “What?”

“Imada and Monty. They’re doing well. They’re on Hange’s squad.”

“What?” she whispered, in absolute shock.

No fucking way… 

“They’re scouts?” she questioned, her eyes wider than saucers.

He scanned her face for a second before realizing, “You didn’t know.”

She sputtered, “W-what—of course, I didn’t know. You think I’d go this long without asking about them if I knew?”

He reddened slightly. It was true, he had wondered why she hadn’t asked about them yet. He wasn’t entirely too sure how to bring them up to her himself. He didn’t want to worry her.

A tiny part of himself also didn’t want to talk about them. He feared bringing them up would inspire her to join the scouts.

She raked her hands through her hair before spitting out one question after the other, “Are they really Scouts? Are they okay?—And Keith? Where’s Keith?”

“He’s a MP,” he stated before grumbling, “Fits right in with em’.”

Her eyes widened some more, “He is?”

She looked to the side as she processed that. A subtle, shocked-induced laugh escaping her lips. She figured he’d become one now but to have it confirmed..

“He really did it.” she murmured, proud.

She might hate the MPs but if her friend's lifelong goal was to become one, she’d support it. All those years where he’d gone on and on about wanting to be an MP; to live somewhere nice and support his family. It was all he ever wanted and now he could do that.

She smiled slightly.

It took her a moment, before fear struck her heart. Her emotions spiraling from shock–admiration–to bittersweetness and now, fear. For all her friends.

“Imada and Monty,” she spoke somewhat sternly, “Are they really okay? Have they gotten injured at all?”

His brows furrowed, he appeared pensive.

“Nothing imperative. Monty twisted his ankle once but he’s better now. He’s back on the field.”

She was silent. Still in disbelief—absolute, utter disbelief.

“And Imada?” she asked, quietly. She couldn’t believe Imada had picked the Scouts. It felt almost like fake news but she knew Levi wouldn’t lie about something like that. There was no reason for him to.

And yet, she was astonished. From the way Imada subtly spoke down about the Scouts she never thought–she never knew that Imada might’ve done that on purpose. She always assumed that it was either a MP or Garrison for Imada. Never a Scout.

Monty didn’t even know what division she wanted to get into. How the hell did he guess she’d pick the Scouts?

“Last I saw her she seemed okay. She slept the entire way back from the expedition.”

He shook his head, “Tch, brat doesn’t know when to take a damn break.”

Her heart-wrenched. That would be Imada. If there was something she could do about a situation, she would do it. No hesitation.

Her hands clenched into fists over her lap as she deliberated all this new information. Her mind was in turmoil, growing more anxious by the second.

“I need.. to see them.” she said slowly, as if processing her words while she spoke them aloud.

She shot up to her feet–suddenly feeling more assertive. She’d walk to Scout Headquarters right now if she had to. She had to see them.

He stood up a second after her, catching her elbow.

“Wait.” he said, “They’re not at HQ right now.”

“Where are they?” she demanded.

“A comrade in their squad died. They’re using their time off to personally deliver his remains to his family.”

She froze, looking away as she processed that. Of course they were.

Her eyes were distant. Her body tense as she internally tried to quell her nerves.

She swallowed, tears stinging her eyes as her heart raced. She missed them. She missed them so much.

His eyes softened. He felt like absolute shit. He should’ve brought them up sooner. He hadn’t known she was unaware of their whereabouts.

“Hey.” he murmured.

His hand on her elbow tugged her close. He hesitated for a moment–unsure if she would want him near–but when she didn’t shove him away he slipped an arm around her waist. He pressed his other hand to the back of her head.

His low voice rumbled close to her ear, “You’ll see them. I’ll arrange it.” he spoke assuredly.

His fingers smoothed down her hair, painstakingly gentle, as she sagged against him.

“I promise.”

Levi snatched the book out of her hand before tossing it closed onto the coffee table before them.

“What's wrong.” he asked, bluntly.

“What are you talking about?”

“You're not even reading.”

It was true. She’d been staring at the same page the whole time–completely zoned out.

She looked over at him. He’d joined her side on the couch moments ago, after freshening up. He smelled strongly of his comforting eucalyptus soap. His dark hair still damp as he let it air-dry.

He’d comfortably seated himself directly beside her, throwing her legs over his lap. He kept an arm on the couch’s backrest while holding up the newspaper in his other hand. The newspaper currently lay unattended on his lap.

His silvery eyes scanned her face and suddenly she felt transparent. With those sharp eyes it was no wonder nothing bypassed him.

She swallowed, “I just… I can’t stop thinking about my friends.”

She looked down, absentmindedly playing with one end of her hair, “I-I know you’re gonna plan something. I just miss them, that’s all.”

He watched her hands fidget over her hair as she spoke.

He reached over and tucked her hair behind her ear, easily slipping the strand out of her hands. She glanced over at him.

His eyes were already on her, “I promised, didn’t I.” he murmured.

“You’ll see them.” he assured her.

She glanced aside before nodding slightly.

He eyed her–as if trying to figure her out. He wasn’t used to reassuring others.

He frowned subtly–but she's always good at reassuring me. He racked his brain.

“Imada’s on Hange’s Squad.” he blurted.

She glanced over at him. After spotting the curious glint in her eyes he decided to continue.

“So is Monty. I barely see them, that squad’s always out doing brainiac shit. Tryna find ways to research titans and capture em–”

“What? You can capture titans?” she asked, astonished.

“Tch, Four-eyes is trying to. Erwin keeps on denying her request.”

“Four-eyes?”

“Hange."

Capture titans? Devon couldn’t even compute that. “That's… insane.”

“You’re telling me.” he grumbled.

She paused before asking, “Did you… talk to them? Imada and Monty?”

She was curious. He had known that they were heading out to send away a fallen comrade after all.

“Barely. I try to check up on em after big expeditions. Spoke to Monty a bit when he’d been stuck in the Infirmary for his ankle. Imada’s harder to grab cuz she’s always busy. She's stuck to Four-eye’s side like glue.”

She shoved his chest, “You couldn’t have told me you talked to them?”

He didn't meet her eyes-appearing somewhat guilty as he answered monotonously, "I should've. I didn't know you weren't aware of where they were."

"Sorry." he added, quietly.

She stared at him for a moment. He was always so stoic and reserved to see him look guilty was almost odd. Though it wasn't entirely misplaced because he had withheld information-crucial information.

She sighed before slipping her hand through his.

She shook her head. Her tone light as she spoke, "I can't believe you didn't think I'd want to know every single encounter you had with them."

He reddened at her admonishing, "S'not like you asked about them."

"Well, I didn't even think you saw them."

He supposed that was a fair point.

"You didn't know what division they picked." he asked flatly.

She went still. Her eyes growing pensive before she looked down.

She shook her head.

It suddenly came back to him that in her 'goodbye' letter to her friends she had mentioned something about not knowing which division Imada and Monty had chose.

Guilt nipped at him. He should've remembered. It was unlike him to forget details.

"Imada didn't tell anyone what division she wanted to get in. She only joined the Training Corps because of the grain incentive."

Levi remembered hearing about that. There'd been a shortage of garrison officers at the time, so the Government decided to utilize the poor by offering a weekly grain reward to the families of those who joined the training corps.

She continued, "Monty did as well. He liked her so.. he wanted to join whatever division she did but even he didn't know. I was supposed to find out what they picked the day I left the training corps but obviously..."

She trailed off, she didn't really like thinking of that night. She'd went through a emotional whirlwind and acted on a whim by leaving her friends-everything-behind.

She glanced over at him beside her. He was staring down at their intertwined hands.

All because of him.

And yet if he hadn't come after her, she had no clue where she would've ended up. She glanced away.

"Hm," he seemed to deliberate that, "So Monty guessed she wanted to be a Scout then."

"Either that or they talked about it. If its the latter then they're both idiots."

She heard him exhale slightly, in humor.

She still couldn't quite wrap her head around it. She didn't understand.

"Why did Imada hide that from me?" she asked, almost too quiet to hear.

His eyes lifted from their intertwined hands. His expression grim as he stared at her side profile.

He had a theory. One that he didn't blame Imada for-if true-because might've done the same. Especially if it meant staying alongside two of his closest friends.

Although he would've preferred to stay with them in a safer environment than the Scout Regiment but he wasn't one to talk.

His fingers tightened around hers, instinctively making her look at him.

"You can ask her when you see her."

She stared into his crystalline gray eyes. He held her gaze.

She shifted slightly, using her free hand to run a hand through her hair—completely unaware of the waft of sweet strawberry she'd sent his way. His mind went dizzy with desire.

He closed his eyes, jaw clenching as his arm on the couch's backrest flexed.

He subtly faced away from her, “Imada knows.. that you’re here, with me.”

Her eyebrows skyrocketed, “You told her?”

He nodded, “I told her you were safe, living at my place.”

She took a moment to deliberate that, “She… didn’t ask to see me?”

"You're the first thing she brings up every time we talk," he went on, "Our squads are rarely at headquarters at the same time or else I-"

His brows furrowed when he realized now would've been the perfect time. If only he'd mentioned it to Monty when he'd caught him in the middle of the hallway. Monty had told him then that Imada and him were heading out to send off a comrade's remains.

"-I would've had you see em' sooner." he grumbled off.

She looked at him, searching his face. He seemed earnest enough, though-it was hard to read his expression-as usual.

He caught her searching gaze.

His jaw hardened, “You don’t believe me.”

“I do,” she squeezed his hand, before murmuring, “I just wish you told me sooner.”

His dark gray eyes dropped, unable to meet hers, “Sorry.”

She didn’t respond. Instead she took a moment to look at him, examining him from head to toe. Completely unaware that her silence was making him question his entire existence.

He was completely still up until the moment she gently placed her head on his chest. Letting her head rest in the crook of his neck as she partly lay over him.

He exhaled. His heart rate gradually easing back to normal.

He watched her untwine her fingers from his, only to take his hand in both of hers. She seemed to be examining his hand. Running her index finger over his knuckles, swiping her thumb over his palm, poking at his calluses.

A second later she began to massage his calluses.

A faint smile tugged at the end of his lip. He dipped his head low to press a tender kiss to her cheek.

“Imada was worried about you living with me.” he muttered.

“Was she?” she continued to rub out his calluses.

“She thinks you still hate me.”

She supposed it made sense. The last time Imada heard her speak about him was when she was shit-talking him in a letter.

“Well, she was right to be worried.” she murmured.

“Yeah?”

She raised her head slightly to look up at him, a subtle-teasing smile on her lips, “Look at what you’ve done to me.”

The words shouldn’t have made him feel the way he did.

He was looking at her. Her pretty face staring up at him through her long lashes. Her little smile. The tempting column of her neck.

When was he not looking at her.

Maybe it was selfish of him to enjoy the way her smooth hands attempted to aid his calluses.

Maybe it was selfish of him to devour her soft lips whenever he got the chance.

Maybe it was selfish of him to put a ring on her finger when he didn’t earn it yet.

Maybe it was selfish of him to stop her from leaving after grabbing her by the hair that night.

Maybe it was selfish of him to let her clean his wounds after coming back from expeditions.

Maybe it was selfish of him to bring her to his place, without a deadline in mind.

Maybe it was selfish of him to steal her from the Scout Regiment–from helping humanity's cause–in the first place.

But when it came to her, he couldn’t help but be selfish.

It was all he wanted to be.

He never wanted to be a part of someone’s life more. He never wanted to see anyone live more.

He'd do everything all over, again and again, if it meant that she'd live–if it meant that they'd end up like this.

As long as he was led to her side.

His hand found her neck, his fingers clasping her throat as his lips ravaged hers. Eagerly moving his lips against hers. Making her lips plump and swollen from his neediness, his hunger.

He pried apart her lips with his own, taking on her mouth as if demanding to have all of her. There was nothing else he wanted this much. Nothing else that he wanted to want him.

Her hands found his chest. Her pulse racing underneath his fingers. Her tongue slid past his, hesitant and inexperienced. She tried to match his movements and it seemed to work because he began to kiss her with a renewed vigor.

Her whole body was alight with energy. This unknown energy that was fueled by her core. The feeling incredibly hot and taunting; it was almost begging her to comply with him. To find an endpoint to this high.

But she didn’t know how. All she knew was that his lips felt so good she was certain she was going to drown.

His arm had wound itself around her back, pushing her further up his lap. His skin felt hot through his clothes. His grip on her desperate.

Her hands cupped his face and the next thing she knew, she was prying her lips away from his.

Her swollen lips already ached for his—despite having just gotten separated, mere seconds ago.

But she was scared. Terribly, terribly scared.

Her eyes were restless as she searched his face. He was flushed. His narrow eyes dark, clouded with need–only to clear rather quickly when he saw something in her face.

Her hands tightened around his face, “A-are you gonna be here tomorrow?”

She was almost scared of his response.

His eyes softened, “Yeah. I’ll be here all day.”

“You promise?”

“I promise, pretty girl.” his deep voice ragged.

His hands smoothed down the sides of her hair. Coaxing her trembling body to relax as she breathed, fighting to catch her breath.

She didn’t know when she started to shake but she was. It was only a slight tremor but he pressed her face into his neck anyway. As if he could quell her slight shakes by holding her against his firm body.

And it seemed he had the right idea because after a few moments she went still. Simply enjoying the feeling of his fingers stroking her hair and the rhythmic thrum of his heartbeat against her ear. The familiarity of his clean scent only calming her further.

Suddenly her stomach rumbled.

“Tch,” though he didn’t sound too annoyed, “You cook somethin’ ?”

She nodded.

“At least lie and say no sometimes.” he grumbled.

She squinted before lifting her head to look at him, “Why?”

He was looking elsewhere, light pink dusting his cheeks, “So a man can take you out to dinner.”

She peeked over the book’s brim to watch him turn around.

She watched him grab the potato peeler and get to work. With each movement of his arm, his dress-shirt tightened over his shoulder blades–outlining his lean back muscles.

She swallowed.

“You didn’t tell me how things went with your co-workers today.”

She didn’t hear his question. She was too distracted by the sight of him turning around to hold the cutting board over the trash, letting the potato peels slide directly into the bin. He glanced down at himself and seemed to notice that one of his shirt-sleeves had unraveled. He set the cutting board down before readjusting his shirt-sleeve, rolling it back up to his elbow.

He then grabbed a fistful of his dress-shirt and yanked it out from underneath his belt, untucking it.

He glanced up, “Devon?”

She blinked, “Y-yes?”

He silently assessed her for a moment before repeating himself, “Did Larsa talk to you about yesterday?”

She finally snapped out of her reverie and her brows furrowed. Something about the sight of him cooking was doing absurd things to her brain.

Are you serious, Devon? She mocked herself.

She ran hand through her hair, “Yeah.. yeah. She did. All my co-workers did actually. They were just concerned.”

“About?”

Her eyes widened momentarily before she looked away. There was no way she was going to tell him that they thought he was abusive.

“They just wanted to make sure I was okay because Iris told them that I looked really upset before I ran off. Obviously I told them that I was mad at… what you did. But I told them that you wanted to come in to apologize. They were pretty understanding, Larsa knew that you were only trying to defend..” me.

She trailed off. For some reason she couldn’t say it outloud. It felt too—

“What’s mine.” he spat.

Her eyes widened before she looked up to see that his gaze was fixated somewhere distant–his lips twisted into a harsh scowl. It seemed he was reliving yesterday’s occurrence.

His eyes flashed towards her, “What even happened to the–”bastard. He cleared his throat, “guy.” he muttered.

She quickly dismissed his earlier comment–not wanting to dwell on how her heart had flip flopped at his claim. Surely he’d just meant it in reference to her co-workers thinking they were engaged. Surely.

“Um.. I’m not fully sure but it seemed they both owned up to saying crude comments after we left. Larsa said they didn’t want to trouble you any further.”

“Tch,” he shook his head, before stating, “So you’re not fired.”

“No,” she absentmindedly fiddled with the smushed corner of her hardcover book, “I’m not fired.”

“Good.” he muttered before turning back towards his food preparation.

She watched him grab a pot and set it in the sink, letting it fill up with water before lifting it easily as he placed it onto the stove to boil–his shirt rippling over his defined back all the while.

She sharply looked down at her book–forcefully prying her gaze off of him with a subtle blush.

What’s mine.

Her heart leapt as she recalled his words. Two simple words that seemed to leave an imprint in her mind.

He’d said those words without a second of hesitance, as if there was nothing else to it–as if it were merely a fact. The earth is round, the sky is blue and she was Levi’s.

Even if he might’ve just spat out the words on impulse… why’d they have to go and make her feel like that?

She scoffed before flipping back a page when she realized that she hadn’t absorbed a single word she just read—too lost in her own head.

“Stop overthinking it.” she mumbled to herself.

Devon ran out onto the rooftop.

Levi stopped the door a second before it hit him in the face.

She glanced over her shoulder, a sheepish expression passing her face, “Sorry.”

He merely shook his head, “Brat.”

Her eyes widened as she insisted, “It was an accident!”

He stood beside her, overlooking the railing.

“Sure it was.”

“If I wanted to hit you, I wouldn’t use a door.”

He glanced over at her, “What would you use.”

She hesitated before raising her fists. He appeared unimpressed.

“They worked well enough last time.” she said in reference to their first and last practice training session on this rooftop.

“Tch,” his eyes narrowed, “That won't be happening again.”

A soft laugh left her lips. She didn’t doubt it—but she’d like to revel in her win a bit longer. And she did that by never offering him a second chance to fight her.

“Where did you learn to fight anyway?” she asked, “I don’t remember seeing those moves in the training corps.”

She was attentive as she watched him lean onto the railing. His eyes hidden from her as his dark hair swayed in the wind, covering his eyes.

Her heart jumped to her throat when silence followed. She suddenly felt like she was being blindsided again. But… she didn’t want to assume, maybe it truly was something he–

“This guy…in the Underground taught me,” his deep voice felt more detached somehow, “He raised me for a little while, after my mother died.”

“I never knew what he was to my mother but–he took me in. He taught me a lot. Taught me how to live in the underground.”

She blinked, stunned.

“Where… where is he now?” she asked–he spoke of him as if he were dead.

“Don’t know. Just up and left one day and never came back.”

“He didn’t–he didn’t say anything before he left?” she asked.

He shook his head.

“His name was Kenny.” he added, almost randomly.

“Kenny?” Where did I hear that name before.. She let out an airy, awkward laugh, “Like Kenny the Ripper?”

Even if the guy was an urban legend, she used to look up to him after what the MPs did to Kate. It wasn’t like she liked the MPs much before her, but Kate solidified it like a hammer to a nail.

“Exactly.”

His deadpan voice made her brows furrow.

He glanced over at her, “He’s Kenny the ripper.”

Her eyes nearly shot out its socket, “A-are you serious?”

At his humorless expression she gaped, “What the fuck? He’s real?”

He looked back out at the distance again, “Yes, he’s real.”

Her mouth was still agape as she processed that. Oddly enough, she believed it. It made sense in her mind–that he was raised by a killer. A killer of over a hundred MPs at that. It was no wonder Levi knew how to fight the way he did..

She stuttered over her words, “I-I don’t understand. How did your mom know Kenny the ripper?”

He turned slightly to face her, but his gaze remained fixed on the view before them.

There was a touch of gentleness to his tone, “My mother was a prostitute, and I was born as a result of it. She raised me there, in that brothel. Once I grew up some she’d send me away at times–so she could… see her clients.”

His hands tightened around the railings, “S-She saw a lot of people before she got ill. Kenny could’ve been one of em for all I know.”

He looked down before muttering, “If he was, he never said it.”

She stood completely still—astonished. This was the most he’d ever spoken about his past and the more he went on, the more she understood why he preferred to keep it to himself.

“Your mom’s illness.. is that how she passed?”

He nodded.

“I-I’m sorry.” the words felt so useless but she felt like she had to utter them regardless.

He merely looked away.

“Your father,” she asked, hesitantly, “Did you know who he was?”

“No, she never told me and I never tried to find out.”

She swallowed before a thought struck her like a bolt of lightning, “Is there a chance.. that Kenny is your father?”

His mouth opened for a second before closing. His thin brows furrowed.

“I- I can’t be sure.” he continued, “He didn’t talk much about her, but he’s one of the few who knew her real name.”

“Her real name?” she questioned.

“Everyone knew my mom as Olympia, but.. he always called her Kuchel.”

“Not like it matters.” he added quietly, almost to himself.

“No wonder you're so strong.” she murmured, still a bit dazed from all this new information.

He looked over at her.

“You were taught how to fight by a serial killer.”

He was still for a moment before muttering, “Everyone in the Underground has to fight, if you wanna live anyway.”

He glanced at her, “You know how it is.”

“I… I do but what did you do? After Kenny left?”

He released the railing and stood upright, “Anything I could at first. Things I shouldn’t have done but I needed the money.”

He ran a hand over his chin, “I got into a lot of shit—didn’t know what the hell I was doing. Didn’t take me long to figure it out though. Kenny gave me all the tools, I-I just didn’t have any direction.”

“Did you join a gang?” she asked.

It wasn’t uncommon in the underground. The underground thrived on gangs, mobs, all the like.

“No, but I almost did.”

“You were alone?” she questioned.

“No, I worked alongside other people but I didn’t find my people until later.”

He continued, “It started when I was offered to steal some ODM gear. ODM gear sells for a shit-ton and we rarely come by it in the Underground so when news broke out that some dumbass Government official was storing some in the Underground everyone wanted their hands on it.”

“I didn’t get what all the fuss was about so when I did the job, I kept one set for myself.”

Her eyes widened.

“In my free time I messed with it till I finally fuckin’ figured out how to use it.” There was a different undercurrent in his tone as he murmured, “It was just like what they said,”

“Makes you feel like you're flying.”

She stared in shock at the newfound glaze that had crept into his eyes. She’d never seen that expression on him before.

He shook his head, “Anyway, it made me realize I didn’t need the mob as much as I thought. Made me realize I could do more–and better.”

“I never really thought much about leaving the mob scene, being a part of it felt like the only shit I was good at. And it was the only thing that brought in money anyway, but..”

His eyes flashed towards her before looking away, “Obviously.. the jobs I took on.. were pretty shit. It was.. starting to mess with me–that dealing with other bitches dirty work was all I knew how to do.”

He leaned back against the railing, crossing his arms, “But ODM gear presented a different opportunity. I told a few of the guys my idea and some of em left with me. I stopped doing most of the mob’s jobs then. Started doing my own thing with the group I had–still wasn’t the best but it was a shit-ton better than before. Things got easier when I managed to secure another set of ODM gear for Furlan..my comrade.”

Something flashed across his gaze and he suddenly appeared gloomier than usual. She didn’t need to ask to know he was dead.

“Did you sell the ODM gear?” she asked, attempting to change the topic.

“No, we used it. It made it much easier for us to do our jobs–MPs could never get us when we were on those things.”

She swallowed–still somewhat mind blown.

Levi was a thug. Captain Levi–was a thug in the Underground.

And now he’s humanity’s strongest soldier.

And from everything he spoke about it was clear–clear that he’s done bad things before. He’s killed–she was certain of it. But instead of feeling fearful, she couldn’t help but find it so… so uncanny.

She’d encountered thugs in the Underground. So secretive and tight knit–people on the streets always had to be wary. They were incredibly foul and money-hungry. Merciless to anyone who came across their way–women didn’t stand a chance. Children, ha, they meant nothing.

The number of times she’d almost been taken, despite being a child—the only thing that had saved her was her legs. Running was the only thing that saved her.

Levi was also young when he’d been abandoned–but he was a boy so things were a bit different. Clearly, they were. He was lucky enough to have someone-a very lethal someone-to teach him how to fight–yet unlucky enough to witness his Mother pass, and his only ‘Father’ figure leave.

But instead of running around the streets and scrambling like she had, he’d been able to fight his way through. To even join the mob, you had to earn your name. And one didn’t just do that by simply existing.

She couldn’t even think about what he’d done.. or what he’s seen.. to get to the point that his ‘jobs’ began to mess with his head. Or maybe it was because Levi had an actual soul compared to those bastards. But-to think-the Levi standing before her was one of them at a point–she couldn’t even picture it. She didn’t want to.

She didn’t want to think about how violent he must’ve had to be–to prove himself capable of ‘jobs’. She didn’t want to think about the blood that rested on his hands. She didn’t want to think about how corrupt the people that hired him must’ve been.

To think he could have been one of the lackeys working for the Government official that had taken her at some point….even if it was just a possibility, or just hired temporarily when she wasn’t around–it didn’t sit right. It didn’t sit right.

He had to do what he could to survive, is what she tried to tell herself but—she had to know. She had to know if.. he’d done jobs like what her false adoptive father had done–or just hurt a kid in general. Or a woman. In the Underground, a lone woman was fair game to thugs.

She would know. She’d narrowly escaped several times.

It wasn’t like killing was any better but the thought of him possibly hurting a woman or child, job or not–

But Levi wouldn’t do those type of things–right? Levi would never… right?

“You.. you didn’t hurt kids, right?” she asked, the sudden rush of fear within her making her words come out fast and uneven. 

She subtly tried to step back, “O-or women–”

His eyes widened momentarily before he grabbed her wrist-stopping her mid-step.

“Stop.” he ordered. He was suddenly directly in front of her, “Women and children was my only rule. I’ve never hurt them.”

He searched her face–concern etching his features when she didn’t meet his gaze.

He placed her hand over his heart, “I swear on my life.”

Her eyes flickered up to his with a sharp inhale. Her breath nearly caught when she saw how steadfast his gaze was.

She believed him.

A deep flush appeared on her cheeks when she realized how distrustful she sounded–just when he’d finally been sharing more about himself. But.. he’d taken it so well. Instead of taking it personally, he immediately reassured her. He must’ve known what she was thinking; that she was thinking of her past.

His heart skipped a beat under her hand.

She squeezed her eyes shut, “Sorry, I just-”

“I know,” his monotone voice quiet. His spare hand tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear, “I should’ve mentioned it earlier. Sorry.”

She was speechless. Her mouth opening and closing several times before she stepped back.

She couldn’t think clearly in his grasp–and she still had some questions she wanted answered.

“So how did you become a Scout then?”

He crossed his arms once more as he leaned back against the railing, “It was for a job. I was supposed to steal a document off Erwin and then kill him.”

Her mouth dropped open.

“It was supposed to secure us money and a surface citizenship,” his gaze seemed distant, “So I let Erwin recruit us-my two partners and I.”

She held up a hand, “Hold up, you’re telling me Commander Erwin Smith came to the Underground just to recruit you guys?”

He blinked, “Yes..”

She gaped once more, “What the hell–how did he even hear about you guys? Who even hired you to kill Commander Erwin?”

“Lovof,” he scowled, “that shitty Noble bastard.”

Her eyes widened, “Huh? A Noble reached out to you-an Underground thug-to kill the Scout Commander on the surface?”

A flash of agitation passed through his eyes, “Are you gonna let me finish or are you gonna keep repeating what I’m telling you.”

“Just how good of a thug were you?” she questioned.

“Lovof already knew Erwin was coming for me, so he cornered me into doing what his sorry-ass couldn’t. He knew we would want surface citizenships.”

She didn’t miss the subtle sneer on his lips. “But then–why would Commander Erwin come after you guys?”

He shrugged, “It was probably all planned by Lovof.”

Levi’s eyes narrowed as he thought about it more, “Erwin must’ve.. heard about us from the MPs since we kept bypassing them with ODM gear but-”

“You see–now that’s insane like,” she let out a short, delirious laugh, “Two thugs using ODM gear from the Underground-”

“Three.” he corrected.

She threw her hands up, “Three of you guys managed to get the MPs pissed enough to complain about you to the Scouts-which we all know how much the MPs hate-so just, imagine that conversation. MPs must’ve wanted to gag when they asked the Scouts for help. Only for the Commander Erwin to personally come to the Underground just to recruit you himself instead of turning you in?!”

“He wasn’t Commander then,” he retorted, before shaking his head as he grumbled to himself, “Course that idiot would want to recruit us instead of handing us over-even after knowing our plan–Tch. Bastard.”

Her eyes widened, “Huh!? You’re telling me he knew you wanted to kill him and he still recruited you?”

Levi’s eyes narrowed, “You're doing that repeating bullshit again.”

She covered her face with her hands as she whined, “Commander Erwin must’ve been so impressed with your ODM skills that he just had to recruit you, ugh!”

She removed her hands from her face, “I’m sick of you being good at everything!”

“What are you on about.” he snapped, before glowering, “Would you stop kissing Erwin’s ass already.”

“What–” she blushed fiercely, “I’m not.”

“It’s all you’ve been doing for the past five minutes.”

It shouldn’t have bothered him as much as it did–but, boy oh boy, he was definitely bothered. Jealousy was searing through him as if he’d just been set aflame by a lit match. It was even more conflicting because he knew where her admiration was coming from, but it pissed him off that she respected him without even seeing him in action. Nothing else to it–nothing to do with that fact that Erwin happened to be a tall, intelligent, not-so-bad looking male that caught her marvel.

She held her hands up, “Okay, guilty. Please continue. No interruptions this time–I promise.”

“Tch,” he shifted slightly–the annoyance clear in his tone, “I don’t even remember what I was on about. Point is, the job failed and I ended up staying with the damn Scouts.”

“Wait but–how’d the job fail?”

The second the last word left her mouth something seemed to shift within the air. Her brows drew together quizzically until she searched his face. His narrow eyes were staring off-adrift-as his jaw gradually tightened. His aura exuded something she couldn’t precisely describe.. it felt dark, uninviting.

Maybe he’d shared enough for the day.

She struggled to find her words, “Erm—you.. you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

He was quiet for a moment. He dropped his folded arms.

“Okay.”

They both stood, awkwardly avoiding direct eye contact before he finally turned around to face the railing once more. The set of his shoulders tense as he gripped the railing.

She bit her lower lip—suddenly feeling guilty. Of course the reason why his mission failed wasn’t going to be the most lighthearted story to tell and yet she’d kept shooting off questions like a curious child.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, “I didn’t know—“

His hands tightened around the railing, “It’s not you, damn it!”

He hastily released the railing, “It’s never you.” he grumbled to himself, almost like an afterthought.

He suddenly cut her glance before stuttering, “I-I mean, I don’t have a problem telling you.” his monotone voice a tinge gentler.

“That day was just a bitch, alright? I-I-” his gray eyes momentarily widened before he ran the back of his hand over his mouth while turning his head away. “I lost them. Lost them both.”

Her throat went dry when she realized what he meant—his two partners had died the day the mission failed.

Despite the flat tone of his voice, the sorrow radiating off of him was unmistakable. The look in his eyes was heart-rending. It was almost as if she could see something was tearing him apart.

He shook his head before looking down at his hands, “If I just hadn’t let them come along–”

He squeezed his eyes shut as he sneered, his shoulders flexing imperceptibility as he recoiled.

“Should’ve never left them alone so soon–” his deep voice constrained, so loathsome, “Should’ve never accepted the shitty deal–”

She suddenly reached out, her eyes wide as her fingers touched his lips, “Stop that talk.” her low voice strong.

Her fingers trembled against his lips as his narrow eyes met hers. The shadows under his eyes only made his silver eyes appear more iridescent.

“You did your best.” she said, her voice so gentle it was almost whispery.

She saw his neck physically constrict at her words before he closed his eyes, his brows furrowing subtly as if struggling to absorb her words.

His hands turned into fists at his sides as he stood rod-straight, “Did I.” his lips brushing against her fingers.

Just before he could turn his head away, her fingers cupped his chin–keeping him facing her. His eyes flashed open as he grabbed her wrist.

“You couldn’t have known.” she insisted, her fingertips shaky against his lips. 

His eyes were wide open as his jaw clenched–tears touched her eyes when she saw just how much pain he was in. The self-loathing and self-deprecation within his gaze was too harsh. She fought the tears biting her eyes to hold his gaze–refusing to let the cold, conflicted war raging within them make her yield.

Suddenly his grip around her wrist tightened and he tilted his face further into her hand–making it so that she was cradling one side of his face. His lips wavered against the palm of her hand. His brows drawn together as he squeezed his eyes shut. The ends of his dark hair tickling her fingertips.

He stood still for a moment, inhaling sharply against her palm.

His shoulders sagged before he slowly opened his eyes. His silver eyes pierced her with an unwarranted intensity as he briefly scanned her features.

“It won’t happen again.” he rumbled in a low murmur. A promise she couldn’t have known the weight of.

She swallowed, a tremor passing through her hand as his lips brushed her palm with each word.

Suddenly a perceptible shiver racked her body when a gust of frosty wind blew past them. Her open hair whipped in the space between them.

He hesitantly released her wrist before lightly touching her hip–unspokenly urging her.

“Lets go inside.” he muttered before his fingertips coincidentally touched the bit of exposed skin underneath her shirt–right at the rim of her pants. His eyes widened.

She tensed underneath his hand and quickly stepped towards the door to hide her reddening face. His fingers slipped away but the electricity of his touch remained.

She raised a hand to her elbow-using that arm to cover her side, the one that he’d just touched.

She peeked over her shoulder at him, “Yeah.” she agreed quietly.

He watched her carefully–eyeing her arm covering the hip he’d touched moments ago. He slowly drew together the fingers that grazed her skin into a loose fist.

She walked towards the rooftop exit first and he followed after her–leaving the cloud shrouded moon to its own company.