Sorry I forgot to add prompt list 1 for number 16 Toko
16. “Can you please just hold me?”
Zuko woke up just as the sun was rising above the horizon. That was normal.
Blinking awake, he tried to sit up and stretch his arms, only to find that his left arm, along with most of the rest of that side of his body, was pinned beneath someone else. That was also normal.
Carefully, he began turning his torso, attempting to wiggle himself loose. He had gotten everything but his lower arm free when he felt a small hand reach out and touch his other arm. That was not normal.
"Go back to sleep," he told her, pressing a kiss to her dark hair. "I've got to get up now." Instead of falling back onto the bed, her hand crept around his back, pulling him closer to her. That was very not normal.
"Stay," he heard her whisper. "Please." And that was very, very not normal.
"Okay, Toph," he said, wrapping his other arm around her. "Whatever you need."
He had several things he needed to do that morning. He had advisors he needed to meet with, documents he needed to sign, letters from foreign dignitaries he needed to reply to. He had an almost-five-year-old who would be waking up sometime in the next hour or two and want his attention.
But none of that mattered right now. What mattered most right now was the woman in his arms, the woman who clearly needed him.
"Do you want me to get you anything?" Zuko asked, stroking her back. "A drink? A healer?"
"No," said Toph, shifting her body until her back was pressed to his chest. "Can you please just hold me?"
"Of course," he said, folding his arms around hers. This was very, very, very not normal.
But if his wife wanted him to hold her, who was he to say no?
Toph closed her eyes, concentrating on the heat at her back and the warmth of her husband's hands.
Breathe, she thought. It's going to be okay. Maybe if she told herself that enough times, she'd start to believe it.
It's too soon. I'm not ready. I can't go through that again.
She pulled her arms tigher around herself, taking another deep breath. Maybe if she didn't think about it, it would go away. Maybe the whole thing was just her imagination.
But as her palm brushed against the side of her stomach, she felt it again. That quick, barely-there ba-bump, ba-bump.
Toph could pretend all she liked, but she'd done this twice before. She knew exactly what she was feeling.
A tiny heartbeat.
Zuko felt his wife's body tremble, and his nose caught the salty scent of her tears.
She's crying.
It wasn't as though Toph never cried. But it wasn't as though she cried often, either.
He opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, he heard her voice, quivering slightly.
"D-did you… see her? Before?" For a moment, he couldn't figure out who his wife was talking about. Her? Before what?
Oh.
"Yeah," he said, burying his nose in her hair. "Yeah, I saw her."
"Do you remember what she looked like?"
Of course he did. It had only been nine or ten months earlier, but even if he lived to be as old as Sozin, he didn't think he'd ever get the image of that too-tiny body out of his head. That too-still chest, that persistent feeling of wrongness. That instinct to pick her up and shake her, as though it would wake her up. Of course he remembered.
"Mhm," he murmured.
"Tell me," Toph said.
Why? Zuko wanted to say. Why would you even ask that?
But this was his wife, and he couldn't deny her anything.
"Perfect," he said softly. "She looked perfect."
Toph let out another sob, and he pulled her closer, twining his legs with hers.
It wasn't your fault, she'd been told, over and over again. It just happens sometimes. But it felt like her fault. She should have known, should have predicted it, should have done something different. Mothers were supposed to protect their children, not let them die before they'd even been born.
Toph's daughter had died without ever taking her first breath.
I can't go through that again. I'm not ready. It's too soon. There had been over three years between her first and second. She'd expected at least that long before her next. It hasn't even been a year.
But she couldn't lie, especially to herself.
"I'm pregnant," she whispered.
For a moment, Zuko froze. I must have heard wrong.
But he knew he hadn't.
It's going to be okay, he wanted to say. Everything's going to be fine, he wanted to tell her. But he couldn't.
Zuko had learnt a long time ago that some things were out of his control.
"I'm here," he said instead, moving his hands below her abdomen. "We're both right here."
Toph took another deep breath. She could do this. She wasn't alone. Zuko was right here with her.
She rolled over again, turning to face him. Softly, she pressed her lips to the side of his neck, above his pulse.
"I love you," she said, wrapping her arms around his waist.
"I love you too," her husband replied. They lay there for several long minutes, not speaking. Just holding each other.
She was just about to slip back into sleep when she felt the slight shaking of footsteps.
There were footsteps coming from all over the palace, of course. Stupid firebenders woke up ridiculously early, and there were already numerous servants and courtiers moving around, getting ready to begin another busy day.
But these footsteps were much smaller-- and much faster-- than any of the others. And they were heading right towards their bedroom.
"Come on," said Toph, releasing Zuko and sitting up. "We've got company."
Zuko groaned in protest, resenting the sudden absence of warmth.
His wife shook his shoulder.
"Get up," she said.
"Nnnnn," he grumbled, burying his face into his pillow. "Don't want to."
"I thought I was supposed to be the one who didn't like getting out of bed in the morning," said Toph. He could hear her snicker.
Before he could formulate a response, he heard another voice coming from the hallway.
"Where are you, Daddy? It's breakfast time!"
Sighing, Zuko stood up, picking his nightrobe off the floor and pulling it around his shoulders.
"Guess we know who's really in charge around here," he said. "You sure you really want another one of those running around?"
His wife punched his shoulder, giggling.
Toph sensed her husband sticking his head out the door.
"I'm coming," he called out. "Mommy and I will be there in a minute!"
She smiled, pressing one hand on her stomach, directly above her womb. She could still feel that small, oh-so-quick heartbeat-- but this time, it didn't seem so scary.
Whatever happens, I'll be okay. After all, I've got everything I need right here with me.
And then she went to join her family for breakfast.
