#lance death

He ended up picking Pidge up halfway to the Branch after she called him crying and begging to make a detour to her house. They ran into the open arms of their brothers with tears streaming down their faces and questions pouring out of their mouths. Both Matt and Shiro attempted to answer them but it was lost in the repeated concern for their general well being.

Really all they wanted to do was get packed up and head home so they could finally sleep in their own beds again. It didn’t take much convincing for them to get out of there. If it were any other time, they would be over the moon with happiness, but when the excitement wore down, the sadness and hopelessness came back full force.

“We want to have a welcome back party for you but our friend is in the hospital, he’s not doing too well,” Keith broke the news to them. They looked at the two of them with morose expressions. A small ping came from Pidge’s cell phone and she quickly looked down at it. A smile spread across her face as she read the message and she turned to look at all of them again.

“Party is back on, he said he wants to meet all of you and we can have the party in his room,” she said excitedly waving her phone at the three of them.

“Is that really okay?” Shiro asked with concern.

“Oh yeah! Totally fine! He’ll love it,” she said confidently. Keith couldn’t argue with that, it seemed like something that Lance really would love.

“If you say so,” Matt said hesitantly but got in the car regardless and they headed towards the hospital. They arrived and headed up to his room in comfortable silence; despite being siblings there wasn’t much to say at the moment, not sure what they could say without accidentally touching on something that shouldn’t be talked about yet. At least not when they were in public, there would be plenty to say when they were back home.

Keith and Pidge led them to the room already familiar with the path there after a few days of constantly being there. As the door to his room was pushed open, a cloud of confetti popped out and landed in Keith’s hair.

“Welcome back!” They both said excitedly, Hunk louder than Lance. They looked around the room with smiles and saw that Hunk had tapped up a few balloons around the room. Keith tried to usher Shiro forward but found that he was frozen stiff in place and staring at Lance with wide eyes. He stumbled forward slightly drawing everyone’s attention to him.

“Lance? Lance McClain?” He breathed out in shock. Lance was confused but nodded anyway. He looked around Shiro to stare at Keith who only shrugged his shoulders. He looked back up into Shiro’s eyes and let out a small gasp. They were the same eyes that looked down at him through the lens of the gas mask.

“Takashi Shirogane?” He asked equally as surprised. Shiro bit his lip and nodded before dropped his head into his hand. Everyone could see his shoulders shaking slightly. With a jolt, Keith moved forward and grabbed Shiro’s arm and started dragging him out of the room.

“We’ll be right back,” he called before he closed the door behind him and he turned to Shiro.

“What’s up? Are you getting a flashback or something? Why do you know Lance?” He asked rapid fire. Through the tears that streamed down his face, Shiro gave Keith a smile.

“I served in Cuba remember? I carried him out of a gassed house,” Shiro sniffled trying to wipe away the tears.

“How come you never told me about that?”

“I thought he died, I thought the only person I could save died,” he managed to get out. Keith looked at him in amazement, what were the chances that Shiro had been the one to drag him out of that house?

“Are you okay to go back in there?” Keith asked with concern, laying his hand on Shiro’s shoulder. Shiro sniffed but nodded his head, taking the time to wipe away the tears that rolled down his face. Keith gave him a small smile and led him back through the door, his hand protectively on his arm. Like before Lance looked up at them with a smile but this time beckoned Shiro closer.

“Come on, tell me everything that happened to you while you were gone,” he said patting the bedside seat invitingly. Shiro hesitated slightly before sending the boy a smile and sitting beside him.

“Are you sure? It wasn’t pretty,” he said with a fake chuckle. Lance huffed and leaned over to grab his hand.

“Trust me, I can take it,” he said with a smile. Shiro looked up at him with wide eyes but clutched onto his hand like a lifeline. He told Lance of his time in the shipwreck, about the months that he and Matt had floated out on the sea, and how they finally got together.

He and Lance smiled, and laughed, and cried together as everything came out. He wasn’t keen on remembering that part of his life. It had been traumatizing, he couldn’t count all of the times he thought of simply slipping off the side of that life raft.

They both waved to Pidge and Matt as they were leaving but immediately were drawn back into the conversation. This time though; Lance told him about what had been happening to him. He told him about being hosted by Hunk’s family, about the support group that brought them all together and finally about Lotor.

“At first I thought that he actually loved me you know, but I mean he hasn’t come to the hospital to see me and the last thing he did was accuse me of faking to be alone with Keith,” he spat clenching his sheets in his hands.

“Well, you don’t have to worry about him anymore, you have all of us,” Shiro said comfortingly. Lance slowly relaxed his hands and looked up at Shiro with a smile.

“I think it’s about time for your pills Lance, I’m going to go see the nurses,” Hunk said gesturing at the door with his thumb.

“Here, I’ll go with you,” Keith said walking up beside him.

“We’ll be back in a few,”

“Okay, thanks buddy,” they watched them leave the room and carefully shut the door behind them. Shiro looked back at Lance with a grin.

“They really care about you Lance,” he commented softly watching Lance’s face. He nodded but his face fell as he looked down at the sheets.

“Can I tell you something, Shiro? It’s something that I can’t tell everyone else,” he asked hesitantly. Shiro blinked but nodded and leaned forward a bit closer.

“What is it?”

“I’m not going to make it through the night,” he admitted with a soft voice. Shiro’s eyes widened and he jolted back as if he got shocked. He searched Lance’s face but he only had a small shaking smile.

“It doesn’t hurt or anything but I can feel it, Shiro,” he said with a resigned sigh. Shiro gulped and squeezed his eyes shut. The soft sombre voice wasn’t right for Lance, he was loud, larger than life. He wasn’t supposed to go this early.

“Do you want us to stay with you?” He asked. His eyes were already getting glassy and his nose was clogging up slightly. He honestly wanted the boy to say yes even though he would be watching Lance march closer to death once again.

He shook his head no, his hand momentarily clutching onto Shiro’s tighter.

“It’s alright Shiro, you just got back, don’t let me ruin that,” he said with a tight smile.

“Lance, you wouldn’t be ruining anything,” Shiro argued softly. Still, Lance shook his head.

“I’m not scared or anything, I’m so happy that I got to live as long as I have, especially after what happened to me,” he looked over at Shiro. “I know when you get the call, you’re going to beat yourself up over it. I don’t need to know you for long to see that. I just wanted you to know in advance,”

It wasn’t long afterwards that Hunk and Keith returned and with a hesitant look back at Lance, they were set to leave.

“Thank you for saving my life Shiro,” he said with a smile as they neared the door. He looked back, at him, forcing a similar smile on his face.

It sure didn’t feel like he did Lance any favours.

“Thanks for visiting me Mullet,” Lance said next, this time a smirk coming to his lips. The two of them huffed out laughs and said goodbye; Shiro with a heavy weight on his shoulders.

As he settled into bed a half hour later, he switched his ringer on.

It wasn’t another hour later that they got the phone call. However, he woke to Keith bursting into his room, sobs already hitching in his throat and tears welling up in his eyes.

The drive back to the hospital was quiet, broken only by the quiet sniffles and small gasps for air.

Seeing Lance look so small on that hospital bed was a sadly familiar sight for Shiro. The rest of the room faded away until it was only the two of them left. He remembered the weeks after the accident that he spent at Lance’s bedside, praying for the young man to show any sign of waking. The night before he was sent out again, he promised that he would be back to visit him again, he never thought that it would be to another hospital bed.

They always talked about the miracle cases. The people that were so important to the world and were almost taken away, but somehow they came out unharmed in the end. Why wasn’t Lance one of these cases?

If he really thought about it, he was one of those cases. If he could give away his miracle, there was no doubt in his mind that it would go to Lance. He had so much more to live for, he would never even see his senior prom. He would never graduate. There were so many things in his life that he took for granted, that he didn’t think mattered, that Lance would never get to experience.

Why didn’t he get him out of the house faster?

If he was just a little bit stronger, or a bit quicker; would Lance be laying in the hospital? Would he have suffered through the last year with barely functioning lungs?

He leaned against the doorway of the hospital room and covered his eyes with his hand. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he desperately tried to keep the despair at bay. He knew what was coming, and Lance was right. His impending death was tearing him up from the inside out.

When he first got to the hospital, he found the only person he was able to save from that horrible attack. But it turned out that he wasn’t able to save anybody. He was just able to prolong their suffering. What kind of rescuer was he?

Shiro had been to a great many funerals so far in his life. Those for his family members, as well as for the lost members of his troop. This was one of those that got to him the most. Lance was a bright light in the centre of the universe, yet he only had ten people at his funeral. Only ten people were there to celebrate his memory.

He didn’t believe that the number of people that showed up at your funeral was indicative of how good your life was, but he did believe that Lance should have had the world lining up to show their respect.

Lance told him not to be sad, or beat himself up for the loss of his life. He intended to follow through with Lance’s wishes. He would take care of himself from now on, but more than that, he was going to take care of the friends that Lance had to leave behind. He knew that it would be hard and it would be a long road to recovery for all of them, but he was willing to put in the work.

After all, Lance never realized how much they would miss him when he was gone.

Part 1/2