lance feels like he's unlovable. it always seems like it's the wrong person, wrong place, or wrong time.
by the time be comes to terms with his feelings for keith, keith ends up having to leave for another BOM mission that's supposed to last a while.
on one hand, lance could confess with hope in his heart that keith would feel the same. if he does, lance would wait. they're stuck in space and there's really no one else so what other choice does he have? but on the other hand, lance could confess and be turned down. either way, at least he's shooting his shot, right? or he could just never say anything, because sometimes it hurts less to hold onto regret than it does to open himself up to getting his heart broken.
before he can choose, whichever is the lesser of two evils, keith figures him out and he's kind of forced to just confess. it's nervewracking, he's shaking and sweating and his heart is threatening to jump out of his throat.
they talk for a bit, going back and forth about the implications of lance's feelings and how it would affect their dynamic as a team. but also, keith is leaving in a couple days and they really don't know how long he'll be gone. lance nods because he knows. he doesn't mention that he's willing to wait because he doesn't want to seem desperate, even though he really is. even though he's only just come to realize how deep his feelings for keith runs, he knows that he's felt this way for a long time.
keith looks him in the eye and tells him that he's not in the right place to be doing anything long distance. he has priorities, not that lance wouldn't be one if anything ever happened between them, it's just so new. if he had known how lance had felt before, maybe there could have been something, maybe there would have been something more solid to hold onto. but he's been with the blades for so long and he's put so much of his time and energy into that, that he can't really focus on blades work and a relationship at the same time.
so lance smiles through yet another heartbreak. he understands. it's not like he really expected anything anyway, especially since he was so close to not confessing to keith in the first place.
but his feelings for keith don’t just go away. if anything, they grow stronger, because that's what happens when you know you can't have something--you only crave it more. it's bad enough that his longing heart yearns for some kind of human connection, but the fact that each time he sees keith might be his last?
he tries not to think about it, though. he throws himself into training and fighting and building upon the voltron coalition, trying not to wallow in the heartache.
maybe he'll find someone else to fall in love with, and maybe he'll find someone that's willing to stay.
