#kidless

“I don’t want kids for a reason. I don’t want to clean up after them and I certainly am not trying to clean up after adults.”

I have been on a bit of a rampage this week at work and in the midst of my frustration, I find myself sounding exactly like my mom:

“Who left their dish in the sink?”

“Who left this empty box sitting here?”

“I am not your mother!”

I suppose it’s inevitable we turn into our folks but I do find it happening more and more. For me, it has a lot to do with the fact that as our company grows, we continue to hire those in their young twenties while I head toward my late thirties.

As Matthew McConaughey famously said, I get older, they stay the same age. His was just much more pervy.

It turns out that I am now the adult. I am the person that people turn to when they have questions about work and life. I am the person that is supposed to be responsible and look out for their best interests. I am someone who has life experience. Oh boy.

I mean, I knew it would happen, I just didn’t realize it would happen so quick! That’s the funny thing about age. It sneaks up on you and while you may not feel older (or in my case - act older), suddenly you are the adult.

I joke all the time I don’t want kids because I have an office full of them. I watch them find their first apartment and learn how much groceries cost. I watch them travel, get married, and start to figure out who they want to be. I watch them grow up and honestly, it’s amazing.

I am not their mother. I am not their friend. I am their boss. Seeing them learn, be successful, and gain confidence in themselves…that’s one of the best feelings there is.

I’ve mentioned before that I’m bad at dating. And by bad, I mean I rarely do it. Along with not wanting kids, being a single, 35-year-old woman who doesn’t frequently date is a whole other conversation. One that I just love having.

Now, it’s not that I mind being single – in fact, part of my problem is that I don’t mind at all. I travel frequently, I have an active group of friends, and I’m comfortable being alone. But there’s another side to it and it’s this –

I don’t feel the need to settle down because my biological clock isn’t ticking.

I remember watching movies where the young protagonist, single and on the hunt for a boyfriend, would constantly be reminded by her friends and family that she was running out of time. If she wanted to have a family, she’d better find a husband, and fast.  

That’s not something that just happens in movies! My parents used to tease me about it and I have friends who are legitimately concerned about finding a husband because they want to be able to have kids while they are still young.

In fact, a friend of mine became so consumed with the idea that it became her life. Every person she dated had to be the one because she was 35. It was legitimately tough to watch. Eventually she decided to freeze her eggs just to take the pressure off. The good news is, it worked. She stopped being so caught up in having to find Mr. Right Now and was able to relax. Oh, and she found a wonderful man who she loves and bought a house with. TBD on the kids.

For those of us who aren’t interested in having kids, it’s a freeing feeling knowing that you aren’t up against mother nature. At least not when it comes to children…