Okay but wtf I have to get up at like 6am tomorrow and it's 1:20am and I still can't sleep. They work I do is exhausting and I KNOW I'm going to be sluggish and slow if I don't sleep enough.
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Okay but wtf I have to get up at like 6am tomorrow and it's 1:20am and I still can't sleep. They work I do is exhausting and I KNOW I'm going to be sluggish and slow if I don't sleep enough.
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Also learned that my stomach issues are also partly histamine related. Not entirely. But I realized I ate a lot of foods that have histamines in them and that was leading me to some worse stomach problems.
Alongside that, I possibly am gluten intolerant. I had some gluten free chips and it actually helped my stomach and after being constipated forever, made me able to somewhat go. And when checking a list of foods that include gluten, I realized a lot of them tend to be my trigger foods. And that when I avoided them, my stomach was more normal. Still problems since it's not solely gluten affecting me. But it was more stable/manageable/routine when I didn't have those things.
So like. That's a big improvement in forming a diet for me. And part of the pursuing autism stuff is also to help get meals made for me so I'm not just eating the bare minimum or a bunch of things like yogurt or eggs or oatmeal or pizza to get anything in me. Yay :)
Y'all. I got these muscle relaxer pills prescribed to me for my neck pain and like. I can actually sleep even when I have leg pain cause of that shit. I also have a prescription pain med now so I'm not just downing tons of aleve or advil constantly. Both have helped a lot.
I'm in PT for my neck issues, but I'm also gonna see doctors about my tmj and for my sinus issues. (Turns out all those things can be related funnily enough.)
Since I've literally woken up with insane pain in my neck and doing massage techniques for my tmj reduces it.
I also haven't been too sinus infectiony lately. I'm not keeping up well with my meds and inhaler, but using them for a few days consistently cut down on a lot.
But for real. Having medication to relax my muscles and deal with pain has helped me a lot since I've kinda been bedridden from my stomach problems. I haven't been able to do my pelvic PT as much or walk around cause my stomach has been so bad. (Mix of diet and just...stomach problems and stress and god knows what else.)
But man. I am like. Living. Being human. All that stuff. I've even been watching more TV shows a lot. Like. Dude. Things are like. Changing for the better.
Since I buried it in my long mom rant post.
We are pursuing disability and are also finally trying to understand my autism. Even my mom disagree with the level 1 diagnosis I received and feels that place was not very good. It took a while. But my future is looking better. And I think I finally got through to her that I need more assistance in daily life. It is even open if I need a caretaker or aid or whatever the word for it is.
I am so glad stuff is going well. And I have really good doctors on my side including one that is dedicated to ehlers danlos and many common comorbities.
He asked me straight up if I thought I had mcas and explained how most people are usually correct when they think they have something. And there's very few instances where they might not be right, but it usually ends up being a discussion of other possibilities or things.
And there's a facebook group for eds that are local around here and even have irl meet ups. So like. There's actual things we have to understand me better and for me to find others to communicate with me. Same with an autism group that is helping us understand my autism and my needs.
Things are looking up. I'm even gonna go to a ball game for my birthday next month. Despite the heat. We are also renting me a wheelchair for it since we don't want to risk pots and heat exhaustion or heat stroke. We are even preparing things ahead of time to help me stay cool. :]
I'm finally getting somewhere. So my life won't be total hell until I move in with Mikey. Yay. :)
omg i just remembered going back home means i can have that strawberry cocktail again CAN TOMORROW COME FASTER
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if any neurotypical person thinks autistic ppl are self-absorbed or care too much ab themselves and too little ab others, i hope these same ppl know that no autistic person likes the feeling. bc the moment anything goes bad in your body and mind it truly feels like everything is crashing, falling apart, going to shit. and sometimes we desperately, desperately need to look around and see the clouds so big and the sky so vast, remember the fact that we're teeny tiny and that there's trees and land and flowers and bees and bears and dogs and birds. i know it sounds "whimsical", but it's just to ground ourselves. it's just to remember that actually, no, the things aren't crashing or falling apart. the world is fine. if everything goes to shit, earth will build itself together, literally. things breathe and live and pulse all the time and i can find comfort and solace on the sight of a fucking butterfly. it's terrible to feel like your body is bigger than everything, so it's amazing to remember that actually you're small and the world is immense and there's a fucking ton of things to discover out there.
Victor Hugo is going to be the death of me and here's why
So I'm walking in the city, right? It's a part I don't ever really go to because I'm from the suburbs. I pass a French restaurant/bar thing and I look at their sign outside. It's all in French, of course - biere, etc. Then I see a word I recognize that genuinely stops me in my tracks.
Can you guess what that word is??
Grisette.
When I tell you I had three full minutes of Les Mis-induced terror and confusion. My brain was going "i know what that means and I don't know why it's here."
So I googled it.
IT'S A BEER
THAT MAKES SENSE BUT I NEED YALL TO EXPERIENCE MY "WHAT THE FUCK" REACTION 😭😭😭
