#khaewrites

Wrong.

It wasn’t easy at all, especially not for a broke high-schooler like yourself. You had no way of saving up money, no way of getting any discount or coupon or whatever voucher was available, and certainly not a pass for being his friend.

Crowley was being stingy with your budget and telling him you wanted to be able to at least afford the items in Mostro Lounge had him gawking at you in disbelief—that was a mistake on your part, you should’ve been more practical with your reasons and lied about it.

Due to your obvious restrictions, it took you several weeks, maybe even months to save up enough for one consultation with him. And perhaps he did predict you’d be so dedicated to hold one with him that when you finally sat in front of him in his office with a proud grin, he only gave you a mirthful smile in response.

God, you like him so much, you were whipped. Why was he so damn attractive!? It sent you into a wayward spiral.

“You’re finally here.” His voice was gentle, but it was laced with amusement, clearly entertained by your determination to have time with him. “You took a long time to get here, I was getting impatient.”

Your cheeks couldn’t hide the blush that was beginning to flush on your face. “Were you waiting for me?” The expectant tone was out in the open, you were (un)secretively hoping he’d say yes.

Your heart burst at his response. “Why wouldn’t I? Don’t you know how fascinating it was to watch you come and go in my lounge just to stack up points?” Azul chuckled, his gloved fist raised to cover the upward curve forming on his lips, “You’re quite the funny person, (Y/n). Do you not realize?”

“W-Well, I am a character of many talents. To make you laugh is just one of them.” Your lip quivered as you profoundly claimed.

Azul shook his head, smiling still before slipping a sheet of paper onto his desk. The printed text was familiar to you, it was one of his contracts, the very title was bold and gold in beautiful cursive. He picked up a quill pen and prepared it with the stationary, finally interlocking his fingers as he looks back to you.

“Well, idle chatter aside, what do you wish for? Anything you want, and I’ll make sure it comes true within my power. We can discuss fees after that.” He was very forward. But if he was going to play that game, then so were you. You’ve done everything all to get this chance, you didn’t want to waste this chance.

You slammed your fists onto the table, startling the second-year as he maintained eye contact with your now-determined eyes. “I want to ask you out, and for you to take me seriously.”

Your outburst must’ve been predicted beforehand. After all, who else would go through such lengths just to get ten minutes with him with seemingly no intention of signing a contract? However, Azul couldn’t fight back the raging blush coloring his cheeks at your declaration of interest towards him. It was still pretty flustering to go through an open confession, especially one from you.

There was a beat before he regained his composure, clearing his throat. “R-Right, that’s… that’s really all you want from me?” He hesitated to ask, sweat rolling off his temple. The blush wasn’t fading any time soon, and his hand shook slightly as he rotated the paper on the desk to face your way, sliding the quill pen to you.

Your gaze never wavered once, staring at him and even going as far as to lean forward, “Yes, I like you Azul Ashengrotto. Please let me ask you out.” You immediately grabbed the pen and uncapped it after reading the terms and conditions carefully, hand already hovering over the blank line where your signature goes.

He sputtered into his fist, blushing even madder than before. “Y-You know, there’s really no need to go as far as sign a contract for something like this…”

You paused before you could fully tap the ink on paper, peering at him from under the fringes of your hair. “What.”

“Wow…” Azul sighed, chuckling slightly in a breath of astonishment. “I’m saying, there’s no need to sign a contract for something so small. I can always grant you that wish without needing a paper for legalization and business personalization.”

“I… don’t?” You trailed off, quiet for a still moment before freezing in embarrassment. “Oh, oh my God, you’re right.”

“You didn’t stop to check with me first?” Azul snorted, but he couldn’t stop smiling. “Sure then, we can arrange a date this week. When are you available?”

You stood up abruptly, turning red. “You’re serious?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I-I mean,” you stammered, “you’re not lying to me, right?”

Azul smiled, now standing at full height. “I assure you, this one’s free of charge.”

Your eyes lit up, sparkling in joy before jumping over the desk to wrap your arms around his neck in an embrace. Awkwardly but firmly, Azul returned the embrace by gently patting you on the head while his free hand went to your waist. The papers and pens fell off his table, but you couldn’t contain the excitement flowing through your body and brain. You were definitely bragging this to your friends.

“… So, this means I still get to make one other contract with you?”

“Yes.”

“Would you agree to making out with me after our first date?”

“…”

“Well?”

“… That one’s also for free.”

He had no problem crossing scorching deserts and land coated in pure white snow — he wouldn’t , at least. But his duty was to protect Liyue and its people. 

It wasn’t as if he could just leave the inn just to traverse through mountains and climb rocks just to see where this tiny pathetic little string leads.

He had come forth with this problem with Rex Lapis, who was no help in any way. He only smiled and vaguely told him with that same amused but also calculative expression he gave to everyone he found the least bit entertaining.

“You’ll meet them eventually.”

Who was ‘them’?

Xiao scoffed that time he heard that — he knew Morax was not underestimating his abilities, nor toying with him and his emotions. But that was honestly a much more anticipated reaction than the cryptic one the former Geo Archon gave then. The Guardian Yaksha could never fathom why he didn’t just say it outright. But he supposes even the most serious people have their own sources of joy and amusement.

“What do you mean I’ll ‘meet them eventually’?”

Zhongli smiled at him. “The one who is truly destined to save you — your soulmate.”

Xiao didn’t understand; he didn’t want to either. So instead of further humoring the taller man, the vigilante yaksha simply stood up from his seat and walked away, leaving Zhongli alone on his table sipping a cup of tea.

---

 He counted the hours.

He counted the minutes.

He counted the seconds.

But of course, sometimes, he’d lose count. So he’d start again, and again, and again — this would happen every time a random no-good bandit pops by, or danger lurks near the Wangshu Inn.

As if the world didn’t want to grant him a moment of serenity where he could just sit around and watch the night sky, counting numbers and time until he’d fall into a slumber. Every so often, his mind would drift back to his last interaction with the tall brunette.

If there was anything he picked up from that , it was that the guardian had a feeling it would be a life-changer for him. Rex Lapis never lied to him, and he doubted he even had the capability to do so — so him saying that the person destined to truly save him from this despair with such confidence — it shocked Xiao.

Xiao almost snorts in amusement.

But it had also exhausted him.

This whole thing where he could only do nothing but wait for the other end to come to him instead.

Yet, he had grown tired of waiting; how many months have passed? How many years have passed?

Why was he even waiting?

Did he want to be saved after all?

Morax said this person would save him completely — he couldn’t have been lured in by that sweet talk, right?

It has been a little over a century, Xiao believes so. The string was yet to throb and move — a motion that people around him would’ve expected to have already heard swing around and be held into a straight line; the sign that his ‘savior’ had arrived. 

But nothing happened over the century. 

A century .

“... this is pointless.” Xiao sighs, pinching the string with his index finger and thumb, bringing it closer to his eyes as he observed it with an analytical gaze, wondering how to separate it from his body without hurting himself and by that, he meant chopping off his arm. There really was no guarantee either whether the string would be cut off or not even after his arm had been cut off.

He sighs, plopping on top of Wangshu Inn’s roof, watching the lanterns light up the sky. There were hundreds, perhaps thousands — he watched them all with a relaxed and contented expression.

A gentle breeze fleets by him, the feeling of the cold wind breezing by his skin tickled him a bit and he liked the feeling of peaceful moments like these — none of his karma to ruin him, no enemy to shed blood of.

Liyue was peaceful; Xiao closed his eyes — although no smile reached his face, he relished in the comfortable silence.

The tug on his pinky finger snaps him to reality. He feels a wave of slight annoyance and he pulls his hand to his chest, as if pettily reminding the string who was alpha — that this mere thread shant keep him caged for some unexplained reason.

A rumbling noise from under the roof he sat on interrupted yet again his doze. He kept his amber optics peeled for any suspicious movement, his spear already on his hand. The weight of the string on his pinky distracted him a bit but it did little to hinder his speed and strength. He jumps down to the ground with a loud thud to encounter the person who he presumed to be out to steal the inn’s money and antique while the owners and visitors were out to watch the lantern festival up close.

Whoever this stranger was that dared to steal at such a solace night — Xiao would be sure to punish them severely.

The noise continued to rustle just behind a bush. His dominant hand suddenly felt much heavier — this time, the weight was overwhelming and the teal-haired man furrows his brows, nearly doubling forward at the sudden gravity. The string no longer limped, Xiao took notice as well.

His heart raced. 

The red string — vermillion and cerise — it was in a horizontal position where it connected him to whatever or whoever it was behind these bushes and the call it was singing to him, it was as if it was luring him to the other end.

He neared, he stepped forward.

Xiao pulls apart the shrubs standing in his way, his weapon long gone before standing over a young woman. His amber-colored contacts met (e/c) orbs and for a moment, silence instilled. It was as if time froze. 

The red string by his pinky, it led to this (h/c)-haired woman battered on the ground who was patching herself up with gauze and bandages.

Then the thread snapped, floating away to wherever.

The girl gaped at him, a shine glossing over her eyes as she immediately dusts herself when she stands. She leaned over to see him clearly. Xiao takes a tentative step back, cautious as she gives him a wide pearly-white grin.

“You’re my soulmate!”

He was short, his stomach was completely bare (and you really tried not to stare at it too much); his eyes were the sweetest baby blue you’ve ever seen while his tiny fangs could be seen protruding sometimes when he snarls at the mention of the enemy. His personality was what you could expect from a General although softer and friendlier. His most outstanding features maybe were his noticeable animal ears and tail that were bushy and soft, you could only wonder how they would feel under your touch. Were his animal attributes sensitive? You hid your inner longing to stroke his ears.

But overall, did you like your substitutional leader? Absolutely. Casting aside his cute appearance, Gorou was certainly fully capable of handling a whole battalion without Kokomi nearby. You’d seen this firsthand with his impeccable ability to keep his troops able to withstand a fight against Kujou Sara while also preventing majority of them from getting hurt.

He was more of a ‘try hard, die hard’ type of person and spoke his mind. Honest, and incredibly admirable for being so, but also dangerous.

“I’ll be dispatching you to scout the camp that’s been getting a little too close for comfort to us for a while now. You don’t have to interfere and cause a fight, just make sure to sneak in and count how many soldiers and weaponry they have on us. Can you do it?”

Kokomi was absent for the rest of the week, tending to business more appropriate for her. Gorou’s palms lay flat on the metallic table, sharp blue eyes looking at you with hope.

Your brows furrowed, “General Gorou, with all due respect, you’re asking me, a doctor, to handle something so dangerous. Isn’t that a bit…”

Silence.

Before he broke it himself, his ears flattening downwards as his hands covered his face in embarrassment. “Crap, I’m sorry, (Y/n).”

You shake your head, “You must be really tired these days. You should take a break once in a while, General Gorou.” You suggested, taking a step closer to the tea table to pour him a cup of his favorite.

The young man scrunched his nose in distaste at the idea, lips curling downward in displeasure. “No one takes breaks in a war, (Y/n). If I take a moment of rest now, what would happen to my men? All of you would be injured by the time I come to.” He closes his eyes as images of the camp getting sabotaged and ruined flash in a split second. “I can’t allow that to happen.”

“We’re not yet in war, General.” You began treading the tightrope, gently starting the conversation. “I believe you’re underestimating the Resistance as well and what they’re capable of.”

Gorou huffs, his ears flattening to the back of his head. “You misunderstand our situation, Doctor. Although we’re not yet physically throat-to-throat with Kujou Sara and her clan just yet, it’s not an excuse to take matters lightly.”

“… Yes, you’re right. I’m sorry.” You frowned. “But one night of rest won’t do you any harm. The leader has to get a wink of sleep to come out stronger when the actual thing arrives, right?”

“I’m strong, (Y/n). And before all else, I must perform a good example in front of all those within the camp—” He stands up abruptly, fist slowly raising itself to the air.

“And they’re hoping you take a break,” you sighed, grabbing him by his shoulders and sitting him back down on the chair, “sleep is just as important for you, General. If you won’t do it for yourself, do it for your people then? If you’re setting a good example, make sure they idolize your sleep schedule too.”

The brunette purses his lips, eyes averting elsewhere to dodge yours. “Yeah… I got it.” You eyed him suspiciously longer than a second, lingering on his slumped form. He caught on to your staring and flinched, rubbing at the back of his nape. “I know, I’ll go rest, don’t worry…” He sighs.

Your frown only deepened at the his effortless reassurance. You weren’t well-versed in psychological conditions but you might as well be an esper(*); Gorou was usually very hard to read so you thought it was an achievement to finally be able to crack his thoughts open like an eggshell at the moment.

You put down the stack of papers you held in your hands, setting it down on the flat surface of the wooden table he had decorated nearby his little futon. His baby blue eyes darted towards the stash, curiosity glinting in them. When they flit towards you, he was taken aback at you slipping off your doctor’s coat and watched as you hang it by the small stool.

He raises a brow, nervous and stiff yet could not bite down the excitement pulsating through his nerves. “W-What are you doing?” His eyes raked your body, mentally punching himself for eyeing you down without your permission.

It wasn’t like you were naked or anything! Left only in a fit sleeveless turtleneck in black; shoulders exposed which may or may not have kept Gorou staring a little too long with a furious blush scattered on his fair skin. A long skirt that cascaded below your shin (to his gratefulness) that covered your legs — it was not a secret at all to the Resistance Camp that you were most definitely an eye-candy.

Not even General Gorou could look away.

You snorted at his reaction, “Sit still, General. I’m not gonna do anything to you.” You make your way behind him, cold hands gripping his shoulders that were capped with armory. “Well, nothing you won’t appreciate me doing anyway.”

Gorou gulped, thoughts going straight down the drain when he felt your voice tingle down his earlobes, his face flustering a cherry red. He was part an animal, his senses were naturally heightened and you being so damn close to him was sending him into a high.

“Just relax.” You murmured, your hold firm.

His grip on his trousers was tight to the point his knuckles could be felt were white now. Bullets of sweat trickle down the side of his neck, breathing uneven as he tried to remain calm in your presence.

“(Y/n), I don’t think we should—” Gorou couldn’t even say another word when he felt gentle hands lightly gripping and massaging his arms and skin with feather-like touches; the pads of your fingers prodding and pressing down on certain spots to relieve him of any sore muscles. In an instant, he turns putty in your hands. His ears flattened in relaxation; his tail wagging just a tiny bit as he sighs dreamily at the sensation offered to him.

You giggled at his softened expression, not able to contain your laughter while applying pressure to the spot between the side of his neck and his shoulder, massaging it gently so it doesn’t hurt.

A smirk curls up on your lips as you did so, not wanting to miss the opportunity to embarrass him. “Was something else going on in your head? Something… perverse?” You teased and his ears hastily colored red in fluster. “For your information, I aid in medicine, not certain body services.”

“… you’re very attractive, Doctor. You should be aware what effect you have on people. It’s… I-It’s not my fault for reacting the way I did…” He clears his throat, bringing up plain excuses. It made your heart flutter nevertheless for your general to think you as pretty.

“I may not be able to help you with your imagination—”

“Stop teasing!”

“Hehe, I’m kidding!” You grinned before your fingers go down the sides of his arms, giving them the same treatment you gave his shoulders and neck. “… I’ll at least be able to help relieve you of any more tense muscles and neck pain. I unfortunately can’t help you out on the battlefield, so…” Your fingers stop, your brows furrowing as your smile evidently grows saddened. “This is as much as I can do.”

Gorou picks up on your insecurity and helplessness in a split second, scoffing as soon as he heard your tone. His gloved hands move to put on top of yours, offering the tiniest bit of comfort.

“Don’t be like that. You’re doing great already as a doctor. We feel safer having you with us. We can only live through various dangers and come this far because of you.” He tells you softly but firmly, eyes glazing up with determination and confidence. “I don’t want you feeling like your worth weighs like nothing. A member of the Resistance Camp will always be a part of the camp itself, it doesn’t matter who you are or what role you play in.”

You gaze at him in awe. And in a few seconds of silence, your face tints pink in shyness, a crooked smile unable to be restrained from curving upwards your lips. Your fingers started massaging his hands this time, carefully bringing his hand up to your lips to plant a soft kiss which uttered a small embarrassed yelp from the male.

“You’re too kind, General. You overestimate my worth,” you chuckle at his face that glowed bright red, “but I’ll be sure not to let you all down.”

“Just call me Gorou, it’s not that hard…” He murmurs, blushing. “I call you by your name, why can’t you?”

Your cheeks flush the color of sweet apple, giggling. “That’s… wouldn’t that be impolite,”

Gorou turned to you, disappointed. “There’s no pressure, but like…”

“Gorou?”

It was the very title that one day would spread a little far too wide in all of Teyvat that his younger siblings would hear of it. Where they would find out he worked as a villain in this cruel world; where his secret that he tried so hard and so long to keep; a secret to keep his family from being involved in dark business that could risk putting them in danger. Childe had to — no, Ajax — this was what he was keeping them from.

A world of monsters, nothing but ruin and lies — a cryptic and unapologetic dimension where if he asked as gently as he could, no one would bat an eyelash to help. A world so corrupted that despite not wanting to turn out a villain, Ajax turned into a fine asset on the battlefield. A world so unkind that just a simple witness to bloodshed would make one’s skin crawl and burn. A world where a young Ajax was forced to be brought into the Fatui because his desire to pursue violence was uncontrollable.

And one day, maybe that flickering grace of sanity in him would one day snap into a wisp of a flame.

Tartaglia couldn’t bear to picture his beloved younger brother look at him with soulless eyes, with indescribable disbelief as he would give him a look of incredulity if he saw his hands dirtied with wet gooey blood. He wouldn’t be able to fathom his surroundings; he might lash out; he might hurt—

No.

Tartaglia shakes his head, trying to rid of the negative thoughts in his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about such things in such an atmospheric calmness. He should be having fun; enjoying the scenery and resting. A good Harbinger shouldn’t break his mind over little things, no?

No. He had to stay calm; stay sane.

His family was waiting for him in Snezhnaya. Returning home into their arms with a broken mind would be like exposing his dark and poisonous behavior to his loved ones when it’s but a part of him.

‘Do not forget, Ajax, you are here to provide for your relatives and to serve the Tsaritsa as she sees fit. She wouldn’t like you questioning your abilities because she is never doubtful of your skills as one of her trustees.’

The ginger-haired male nearly lets out a laugh — would his family still look at him the same? Like he is a proud warrior who fights for the better good, someone who brings his family’s name to honor by selling toys that all children alike enjoy the toys he make? Would Teucer still look at him with those sparkling, bright jewels in his ocean-blue eyes, gazing up at him with unparalleled admiration? Or would they all turn their back on him, realizing that they’d been admiring a murderer in disguise?

Archons, he needed a distraction—

“Ajax?” A soft whisper brings him back to reality. The hallucination of his family staring at him in horror disintegrated into dust, his lifeless eyes blinking to turn his head sideways. His eyes met (e/c), and he felt his heart soften.

The girl he loves, the woman of his dreams, the queen he would rightfully do anything for so long as it was in his power. You were beautiful, inside and out. Your smile as your lips curl up onto an upwards curve, showing off that perfect smile that would brighten up his days to no end; your eyes that shined in the darkest of nights that not even the moon could compare; your hands that he loved holding even if there was no reason to — if people asked him if you were some sort of divine being, he would’ve responded yes. There was no one like you in the world.

The woman that loves him, the woman that cares for him, the woman that he keeps coming home to because he was high off on paradise every second he spent with you. There, next to him on the grass, you lied next to him with your hands resting on your chest as your head was tilted to face him.

“Yeah… what is it?”

You gave him a disapproving frown, brows furrowing. “You had this look again.”

“Did I?” The Snezhnayan male chuckles awkwardly as he rolled over to his sides so his right arm now supported his whole weight while his left hand caressed your cheek gently, a portion of his body hovering over you as he leans down to gently rub his nose with yours. “Sorry, I tend to… overthink sometimes.”

You bit down the giggle that almost slipped out from the eskimo kiss, your arms instead wrapping around his neck as you brought him closer. “That so? Mind if I know what it was about?” Your lips pecked his, and in just that split second, Tartaglia forgot what he was thinking of earlier.

God, he was drunk on love. And he wanted to bathe in it more, especially because it was you.

“Take a guess, I’d like to know too.” He teases, his pearly white teeth flashing as he coyly stares at you with a boyish grin. “I wonder what I was thinking about.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either.

You giggle, pushing his hovering body off of you and instead topping him by placing your two hands on either side of his body. Tartaglia was taken off guard, eyes flitting towards yours in slight surprise since you didn’t usually attack him first. You leaned down, lips brushing against his before letting out a short giggle.

Ajax nearly feels his heart jump out of his chest at your teasing, his cheeks reddening at what you were trying to do. His heart pounded hard and he was sure if you listened closely, you would hear the rapid noises it was making. But he focused on you solely — noticing how close you were and how he could practically feel your breath fanning on his lips every time you parted just a bit of those lips.

You were constantly in his vicinity after every battle, always in his line of vision, always so close to him — so close that he loved getting all too many opportunities to hug you, to hold your hand, to touch you, to kiss you any time he wanted; he loves simply just being there with you.

Every moment, to him, mattered.

It was when the ginger-haired male had finally grabbed all courage inside his heart to bring a hand up to the back of your head and push you closer. His head raised up a bit to meet your lips in a gentle kiss; one that, although you didn’t see coming (you probably did), you returned with just as much gentleness. Your lips and his moved in synchrony but unfortunately you both had to pull away for breath.

“What’s up with you today?” You laugh softly as you pulled away. “You’re quite soft today, not that it’s a bad thing.” You mused, seeing your lover’s expression convert into slight embarrassment, his cheeks tinted red.

He clears his throat, flushed cheeks. “Ah… well…”

You giggle and roll off of him, back onto the grass that tickled your cheeks. The silence that ensued after wasn’t uncomfortable in the least bit. Any moment with you was shared special, no matter where there are interactions or not. He counted them all and described each one as heavenly.

“Hmm… this is… a little random but,” this time, Ajax turned his head to look at you in curiosity, “what is home to you?”

He’d known beforehand what you’d lived as before he’d crossed paths with you — you were a victim of domestic abuse, and he was very much aware how much torment and pain you’d went through before stumbling upon him in dirtied garments. He had the option to ignore you, but the fear in your eyes triggered something in him — reminding him of himself from when he’d fallen into the Abyss.

Tartaglia was slightly apathetic as you asked, but as soon as you did, two things appeared in his head. One of his family in Snezhnaya and you, his beloved. The male hums in ponder, eyes darting upward, squinting slightly as they were blinded by the literal sun.

“You are my home.”

“Huh?”

“I would’ve honestly answered my family but,” he turns to you, eyes as dead as ever as he confesses, “they are my heart instead.”

You frowned. “Technically, in this given scenario, aren’t they the same?”

“They’re different for me. I can live without a home, but a heart I know I can’t go forward without.” He spoke, an aching in your chest stinging as he finishes.

And it hit you just how cold the meaning of his words meant. It was simple and straightforward, there was nothing to not get. That if he had to choose between his family and you, he wasn’t going to hesitate dropping you onto a pot of boiling lava for his own blood-related loved ones.

“I-I see… I’m sorry… for asking.” You apologized meekly, shying away now that you realized your worth in comparison to his family paled by a stretch away. What hurt, really, was that he didn’t even think twice about his decision. You knew already that he would pick family over you, but it still hurt.

“But,” he pauses again and you perked up, eyes darting to him in nervousness, “without a home, I’m lost and alone.” Ajax turned to you, eyes softening a great amount as his thumb brushes over your cheek lovingly. “You are my home, (Y/n). You make me feel safe and protected—make me feel like I can be myself without a hindrance, make me feel comfortable. You…” He trails off, his forehead leaning on yours. “I love you. And that even if I can live without you, I wouldn’t.”

Your heart beat erratically, your nose turning red as you sniffled. “Oh…” You tear up, hiding your face in your hands as he continued to caress your skin in a graceful manner.

“I… love you too. You’re my home too, Ajax—and I… I’m so glad you’re here…” You stammered, choking on your sobs before wrapping your arms around him. Under the bask of sunrays and amber light, you two held each other in a moment of peace and serenity.