#jmf

For people wanting to support the families of Tumbler Ridge, verified fundraisers have been collected by the Johnny Malcolm Foundation:

Did you hear that a JMFJ trade is due in the next two days? I’m so emo even though I’ve spent the preseason already yelling at him. I wish he could stay on the Pens even if he’s a healthy scratch most of the time.

After a while, you stop believing in Empathy. These people have their own ideas of what you're experiencing, because they think they know you better than yourself. They stop to pity you, rather than to listen to you. You are not their friend, you are their burden. After a while, you no longer believe in the concept of friendship. Unless you can offer something in your turmoil, you are of no use. "I will come back when you're healthier". They no longer want to grow with you, instead they leave when times get hard. It is easier to want to be a part of someone's life when they are going somewhere, rather than when they are still searching for guidance. After a while, you will no longer believe in fairness. "It is easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission." They will take from you until you are nothing. They will build themselves up with your ashes. You will demand respect and they will laugh at you. "I don't know what you're talking about, I've never had that issue". They will gaslight your successes. They will leave when you are used up. These people will tell you that you are toxic. Maybe you are. Maybe you are not. Maybe your progress and success blossomed the same way theirs did. You took care of yourself, you were rightfully selfish, you took what was most definitely yours. But you changed who you were and what you were capable of, by yourself. You became better because you knew it was necessary. Not for them, but for yourself. They will expect you to open your arms again - even though they have not changed themselves. They will expect you to thank them for their kindness, for leaving you and creating the space for you to grow. Do not. Do not open your arms. Do not thank them. Do not allow them to take credit for what you have accomplished. You stopped believing in Empathy, you stopped believing in friendship, you stopped believing in fairness, because of them. You built yourself up without any of their help. You forged your own army without their forgiveness, without their permission, without their understanding. You defined what it means to have empathy. You defined what real friendship is. You practice fairness whenever possible. You do not have to apologize for saying no when you refuse them to take a place in your life. You do not have to welcome them back after they left you stranded. You became stronger with out them - give them no credit. Do not let them believe their leaving you made you stronger. You changed without them. You grew without them. You now have control over your own life, without them. In the hardest of times you did not abandon anyone. You created a person you can be proud of, a person deserving of love and respect. It is okay to tell these people they are not welcome in your life anymore. "You did not want me at my worst, so you do not deserve me at my best." You will be stronger knowing you told a narcissist you are better without them and that it is true.