Hello I have jealous Knoxville brain rot and I was wondering if you could write a Knoxville x fem!reader where the reader is bams best friend and they grew up skating together attached at the hip but Johnny is fully into the reader and she’s into Johnny (he does not see this) but he thinks she and bam are going to date because everyone thinks they would make the perfect couple. It can take whatever direction you would prefer from there I just would die for some pining jealous Knox 😭
Going Up
[Johnny Knoxville x F!Reader]
Desc: Anon covered it but I made it smutty! As in elevator sex smutty...
A/n: need to put eyeliner on johnny rn. also I'm trying to do something different in all of my smuts so they don’t get boring or repetitive to write so lmk if you like it!! comments and reblogs make my day fr <3
Warnings: smut (18+), p in v, public sex (sort of), alcohol
3.4k words
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Bam and you were fucking around on your boards, doing stupid tricks and just wasting time until you were called to set. You always thought it was stupid that your call times were so early when you were never really needed until the afternoon at least. Nonetheless you showed up, bored and hungover.
“Fuck I’ve almost got it.” You bitched, irritated that you couldn’t succeed in the easiest tricks when your head was throbbing from the night before. Bam laughed,
“Yeah, sure you do.” This earned him a prompt thump on the arm from your fist, your teeth grinding.
“Shut up, dickhead.” He still laughed, only holding the site of injury this time. He looked up behind you and raised his eyebrows. You spun around to see who he was looking at only to see Johnny Knoxville staring over at the two of you, quickly shifting his gaze once you spotted him, pretending he wasn’t looking.
“Hmmm.” Bam hmmmed.
“What?” You asked, skating in circles around him.
“He’s got the hots for you.”
You rolled your eyes, “You think everyone’s got the hots for me.”
“Because they do!”
You scoffed, “Your ego for me is bigger than my own. No one even asks me out anymore.”
“That’s ‘cause they think we’re dating.”
You pouted in contemplation. “I guess. Well why won’t you date me then?!” You brought your arms around Bam’s neck in mockery as you skated past him, laughing as he attempted to shoo you off. You planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek like a drunken aunt.
“You’re gross. You’re like my sister, freak.” You giggled as Bam attempted to wipe your spit off his face, arms still wrapped around him.
Johnny swallowed thickly as he observed you acting all coupley with Bam, sipping the crappy cup of coffee he got from the catering table when Ryan wandered over to him and looked to see what he was gawking at. He sighed,
“You know they’re not dating, right?” Johnny was snapped out of his daze upon hearing his voice.
He cleared his throat, “What? Oh, uh. Yeah.” He scratched the back of his head, feeling caught. He bit his lip, looking back over to you, his heart beating a little faster the wider you smiled.
“She probably likes you dude. There’s not many women that don’t.” Johnny took another sip from his styrofoam cup, eyes still on you, shrugging. Ry just shook his head, chuckling under his breath. He patted Johnny reassuringly on his shoulder and walked away, leaving him to yearn a little longer. You glanced up to see Johnnys eyes still drinking you in. You smiled and waved at him jokingly, causing his cheeks to flush as he hobbled off. Maybe he does have the hots for you after all.
“She probably likes you dude. There’s not many women that don’t.” Johnny took another sip from his styrofoam cup, eyes still on you, shrugging. Ry just shook his head, chuckling under his breath. He patted Johnny reassuringly on his shoulder and walked away, leaving him to yearn a little longer. You glanced up to see Johnnys eyes still drinking you in. You smiled and waved at him jokingly, causing his cheeks to flush as he hobbled off. Maybe he does have the hots for you after all.
A few days later you were in your hotel room applying your makeup, ready to go hit the bars after filming on location in New York. Bam and you were sharing, not the same bed but still, it didn’t help the rumours. You carefully lined your lips with liner as Bam lay on his bed staring at the ceiling, bored out of his tree waiting on you.
“The bars are gonna be fucking closed by the time we leave.” You rolled your eyes, rubbing your lips together and tousling your hair.
“It’s not even eleven yet. We’re gonna be early freak.” Bam pushed himself off the mattress,
“Fuck this, I’m leaving with Ryan it’s too late to be this sober.”
He grabbed his jacket and key card and swung the door open only to be met with a tall figure, hand raised and ready to knock.
“Johnny.” Bam spoke, leading you to snap your head to take a look at the supposed man at your door.
“Hey.” The often confident man’s voice wavered awkwardly, as if he had been caught in a trap. Bam leaned back to look at you, then back to Johnny, smiling like an idiot.
“I was about to head with Ryan, you can come if you want or uh…” Bam raised his brows suggestively, something you didn’t spot. Johnny cleared his throat and swallowed thickly, contemplating for a moment whether or not he wanted to let it out that he’d rather stay with you.
“I can stay with her while she gets ready. Bring you down if you want.” He called out to you, biting the bullet. You flicked your hair away from your face, grinning,
“Sure. I’ll be ready in a minute anyways.” Bam shrugged and left the two of you to it, Johnny stumbling in and seating himself on the edge of your bed, observing you through the mirror as you smudged some more eyeliner in your waterline.
“That looks like it hurts. Is it not going into your eye?!” Johnny gritted his teeth together while you giggled.
“I’m used to it. Here let me put some on you.” You held the eyeliner pencil between your fingers and turned to face him though his hands were already raised up, refusing.
“Oh come on! It doesn’t hurt and you can wash it off if you really hate it!” You flashed your best puppy dog eyes which ultimately worked as he simply couldn’t say no to you when you looked like that. He rolled his eyes as you grinned, moving closer to him. His breath hitched as your knees brushed against his, hands holding himself up as he leaned back slightly, eyes peering up at you. You took your bottom lip between your teeth in concentration and rested your hand against his cheek, Johnny swallowing right after. You used your thumb to pull his eye down just a tad, enough to see his waterline and went right in to apply it, accidentally poking him straight in the eye.
“Ow!” The jabbed exclaimed, pulling away from you and holding his hand over his eye dramatically.
You rolled you eyes. “Alright sorry. It was only a poke! C’mere it didn’t even get in your waterline.” Johnny was about to protest but felt he couldn’t once you pulled his face forward again forcefully, tongue poking out of your mouth as you concentrated on the task at hand.
He looked up to the ceiling and pretended the situation wasn’t incredibly uncomfortable as your raised leg kneeled on his lap in order to get the job done, face so close to his own as you tediously worked on coating his under eyes with black eyeliner. He couldn’t help but let his eyes drift to take you in, somehow you looked even more beautiful when you were in concentration. Your eyes met his and you smiled with your brows knitted together, a little unsure on why he was gawking once again. Well not really unsure, you were fairly sure. As you got back to it, Johnny posed a question,
“So you do this with Bam a lot huh?” You rolled your eyes at the insinuation of it.
“Well yeah, ever since he saw Ville with it he begs me to do it all the time. He fucks it up whenever he tries to put it on himself.” You pulled the pencil away to admire your work as the first eye seemed done.
“Looks good.” You smile, Johnny trying to move his head to take a look in the mirror but your hand pulling his face away.
“Not yet. Lemme do the other one.” You repeated your movements of pulling his eye down slightly with your thumb to do the next one, brows knitted together.
Johnny looked up to you, sunken eyes boring into your face.
“So you and Bam huh?” You scoffed, that was a sentence you heard practically everyday.
“No. Not me and Bam. How long have I known you at this stage?!”
Johnny smiled. “I dunno. You’re sharing a hotel room so.” His southern voice drawled. You continued penciling in the makeup.
“Different beds idiot. MTV’s budget must be tight this year.”
Johnny bit his lip. “So there’s nothing going on there.”
You shook your head, “Nothing.” That’s when you finished the job, pulling away to admire your work.
“Not bad huh?” This time you allowed Johnny to look at himself, standing up to get closer to the mirror.
“Christ I look ridiculous.”
You laughed, “No you don’t! This is so in right now.” You folded your arms and came up to the mirror as well to look at his face through the reflection.
“Yeah it’s in for twenty year olds. I’m old remember?”
You rolled your eyes. “You’re only like nine years older than me.”
Johnny flashed you a ‘careful’ look, but you smiled it off. He looked fucking hot if you were being honest, and that little crush you had on him was coming back in full force. You bit your lip as you and Johnny stared at each other for a little too long until he bustled off to the bathroom to attempt to scrub the liner off. His efforts were almost futile, a faint black still present in his waterline.
“That’s hot! No, seriously it looks good like that.” Johnny sighed as he realised he’d have to go out with a trace of makeup on his face.
“Are girls gonna think I’m gay?”
You laughed, shaking your head. “Well you’ll have me on your arm so, hopefully not.” Johnny raised his brow at you but you ignored him, grabbing your purse, ready to hit the bars.
The bar everyone was meeting at was busy and bustling, a live band playing. You and Johnny arrived together of course and hit the bar immediately to get some drinks, already far too sober compared to the likes of Chris and Steve-o. You sat together in slightly close quarters, chatting amongst yourselves. You were enjoying his company, he smelled nice and the more you drank the more flirty you got. You had already punched Steve-o square in the arm when he made a dumb comment about Johnny’s ‘new look’ and an hour later his arm was draped over you. That was until Bam stumbled over to you all, clearly very drunk.
“You have to come dance with me. Now!” He reached out and grabbed your hand, forcing you up and away from your arm candy.
“Hey!” You called out but Bam was already pulling you onto the dance floor, hands grabbing your waist to dance with you.
You reluctantly pulled your arms up around Bam’s shoulders. Sure you loved to dance but when you did with Bam and you were drunk, the rumours were only set ablaze. You tried to catch Johnnys eyes as you swung your hips, only seeing him grit his teeth and practically glare at Bam. Was he… jealous? You looked at your dance partner who was too inebriated to have any sort of spatial awareness, simply blindly moving you around. Out of the corner of your eye you spotted an attractive looking girl dancing by herself and so you hatched a plan. As Johnny continued to glare you pushed Bam off of you and practically shoved him towards the other girl.
“This is Bam!” You called out to her and she looked rather thrilled, must’ve been a fan.
As the new couple began to dance once more you strutted over towards Johnny who was now looking at you like a deer in the headlights.
“Come on. You wanna dance with me right? Well dance with me now!” You slipped your hand in his and pulled him up, dragging him behind you as you set off for the floor.
Johnny was in slight shock, his hands finding their way to your waist in a daze as you brought your arms around his neck, moving your hips with the beat. You looked up to Johnny and flashed a smug grin,
“Were you jealous Knoxville?”
Johnny blushed, laughing and shaking his head.
“So what if I was?”
You smiled even wider, taking Johnny’s hand from your waist and moving it down to cup your ass.
“You don’t need to be.”
You chewed your lip as his hands felt you up on the dance floor, not caring that people might see your skirt riding up and exposing your ass. Johnny looked especially attractive as he appeared almost flustered, cheeks burning red and eyes blown out. As the music changed you moved yourself around so your back was pressed against his chest, letting his arms drape around you and push you closer to him, feeling the outline of his dick press into your ass. You grinded to the beat of the loud music, feeling his breath on your neck and his stubble grazing your skin. It felt almost too intimate right there in the middle of all the bodies, sweaty and drunk, but god did you want him. You placed your hand over Johnny’s as it pressed into your stomach to hold you there and turned around so you could whisper in his ear,
“Wanna get out of here?”
Johnny only nodded, allowing you to lead him away from the crowds and out of the bar towards your hotel. Boy were you glad it was so close by as the desperation was radiating off of your hot bodies, clammy hands holding each other as you made your way through the streets, no talking necessary.
You both smiled politely at the receptionists as you wandered inside the hotel, trying to act as if you weren’t as desperate as you’d ever been, silently praying no stranger would join you in the elevator on your way up. Alas you were left alone, standing side by side as the doors shut. One second later Johnny flipped himself around and slammed his lips onto yours, forcing his leg between yours so they were parted and making out with you roughly. Your hands flew up to hold his face, letting out quiet whimpers as he took you with such force. His hands were already roaming over your body, fisting the fabric of the back of your skirt in his hand and pulling it up. If you didn’t know him any better you’d think he was about to fuck you in the elevator.
That’s when you felt it jolt, stopping on whatever floor you were on. You opened your eyes and pulled away from Johnny’s mouth in a panic, thinking something had broken but instead you were met with his hand over the emergency stop button, manical grin on his face. You covered your mouth with your hand, half shocked but entirely bemused.
“Are you serious?!” You laughed, completely bewildered.
“Couldn’t wait any longer.” is all he said, immediately diving back in to kiss you once more.
As your skirt had already been pushed up over your ass, in fact bunched up around your waist, Johnny’s fingers were smoothly tucked into the band of your panties, waiting for the moment he could finally pull them down. He took the opportunity as soon as your hand reached down to palm him over his pants, pushing your body against the wall of the elevator at the same time. You let out a groan as you frantically unbuckled his pants, him eventually giving in and shoving them down to pool around his ankles instead.
After some more hot and heavy making out, you felt Johnny’s hard cock press into the inside of your thigh and so you took matters into your own hands, freeing the member and urging him to fuck you against the cool metal walls of the box. You moaned as he entered you, his stubbly chin grazing your neck and lips kissing the skin tenderly as he began bucking his hips forward. He dug his thumbs into the skin of your waist to hold you still, your arms wrapping around his neck to brace yourself the faster he went.
Johnny’s grunts and your whimpers echoed around the elevator, it even jolted slightly with every thrust and it almost felt surreal that heart throb Johnny Knoxville was fucking you in a hotel elevator. You hid your girlish grin in the crook of his neck, kissing and sucking on it all the while.
“You think Bam could fuck me like this?” You whispered into his ear.
Sure it was evil but god did you love provoking the men that fucked you, it just makes everything more fun. Johnny laughed, more of a ‘fuck you’ sort of chuckle but he laughed nonetheless.
“You gonna talk about Bam while I’m balls deep inside of you?”
Johnny pulled his lips away from your neck to look you in the eye, yours as blown out as his. You grinned playfully.
“Well this means you don’t have to be jealous anymore. Your eyeliners fucking hot by the way”
Johnny laughed.
“Shut up.”
He continued to fuck you hard, his thrusts only increasing in pace and his moans only getting louder along with yours. It wasn’t long until he got you to that familiar place, head leaning back against the wall as you were worked to the edge.
“Fuck I’m gonna come.” You managed to get out between pants, holding onto your breath as you felt the sensation creep forward.
Johnny continued his relentless pace until you came hurtling down, the wave of pleasure washing over you and making your legs shake. The feeling of you tightening around Johnny made his breath hitch as you brought him closer to the edge.
“Can I come inside you baby?”
You nodded, head still reeling from your orgasm. Johnny gripped your hips tightly, pushing even further into you as he came with a loud groan into your neck, the hot breath sending shivers down your spine.
The two of you remained in the same place, panting and fucked out, sweat dripping from your foreheads. Johnny’s head was still buried in the crook of your neck.
“You alright there?” You laughed, poking his cheek.
He pulled away grinning.
“That’s the hottest thing I’ve ever done.”
You both laughed until Johnny kissed you again, your heads all foggy.
“You know we can do this again once we’re out of this elevator right?” You pulled away once his kisses got more needy, practically ready for round two already when his dick was growing soft inside you.
He laughed as he pulled out of you, the sensation making you wince slightly.
“Sorry.” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your cheek.
He bent down to help pull your panties back up and smooth your skirt out after buckling up his own pants. He fixed himself up a little more before pressing the emergency stop button once again as well as another button.
“Shit.” He muttered.
“What?!”
Johnny bared his teeth.
“I accidentally pressed the reception floor.”
You rolled your eyes and scoffed.
“Christ I hope those poor workers don’t see us again.”
Just as you attempted to fix up your hair the doors opened to reveal none other than Bam Margera himself, arm sleazily hung over the same girl you threw him at on the dance floor. You and Johnny must’ve looked like a deer in headlights right then but Bam was far too drunk and oblivious to notice just yet.
“Oh hey guys!” He grinned, entering with his new chick, her hand dragging over his chest.
“Weird the elevator wasn’t working for a minute. What were you guys doing already in here, I thought you left like thirty minutes ago?” Bam asked but his face dropped once it dawned on him.
He observed the pair of you, your makeup all messed up with tangled hair, skirt all wrinkled and Johnny with his messy hair and lipstick stains coating his neck and collar.
“Oh.”
“Let’s not.” You interjected before Bam could say anything that would make your skin crawl.
The rest of the elevator ride was painfully awkward and silent, even Bam’s girl noticing the horrible tension. Once you finally reached your floor after what felt like forever Bam spoke up.
“So uhh... can we take our room or do you want to-”
“Take our room.” You sputtered, leaving the damn elevator as soon as possible and darting towards Knoxville’s room, desperate to escape.
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Category: Funny and Fluffy as a Golden Retriever puppy
Content Warning: nah, just age gap. I apologise because is not gender neutral. I'm not a native speaker and in my language (italian) there's no way to use neutral on people. I'm studying in order to be able to write gender neutral fic in the near future!
Summary: during an interview with his old friend Conan, Johnny is asked to answer some questions about you, his new girlfriend who also is a famous musician and actress. The deal? A significant age gap. Even if you're a grow ass woman, you look younger than your age and everyone knows that you are a Jackass' fan since your teens.
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The audience is still laughing at Knox, when Conan tries to call it out, moving is hand in the air like he is trying to catch a fly. 《 As far as I know, not everything went smoothly for you on the set, right? That's quite the routine but this time it was more serious. You took a pretty awfull hit because of that bull.》
Johnny is nodding while he starts to answer. 《 That was really gnarly. The worse hit I have ever taken. It caused me a broke rib, broken wrist, a bad concussion with brain bleeding....》
《 That sounds bad, let me tell you this. I was speechless while I was watching that bit. Did you full recovered from that?》
《 Now I'm healthier than I used to be. But it took a while, that's true.》 Knox hates to turn down the atmosphere, but there is no chance to tell this story sounding funny. 《 I lost some of my cognitive abilities .... and I had to lean a lot on my dearest ones during the healing process. Expecially on my girlfriend, (y/n). 》
The audience starts clapping, while Johnny smiles. Conan is really good in take his chances in this cases, especially with people like Johnny Knoxville, who is not that open on his sentimental life. 《 We are talking about (y/l and y/l/n), right? 》
《 Affirmative 》, is the answer of the silver hair man, who is not able to hide a note of pure proud in his voice.
《 She was here a couple of weeks ago, promoting the new album with the boys. She didn't say a thing about you.》
《 She is something, right?》 Johnny chuckled, sitting more comfortably on the soft armchair. 《 Yes, we decide to tell the world during the premier of Jackass Forever. Sami Zayn tought he would be the real surprise of the night but... he failed. Again.》
Conan and most of the people in the pubblic laught. 《And you two were already togheter while you were filming the last Jackass?》
《 Yes, she is also in the movie but I didn't allow any big stunts with her. I was able to stop her plans with Jeff Tremaine in time. I can tell if I will be this lucky in the future.》
Conan looks surprised. 《 Do you believe that she could...?》
《 Oh, totally》 Johnny cut him off, not even the shadow of a doubt shown 《 I turned around at some point, because i needed to talk with Pontius and when I look for her again she was already on a skateboard. With Steve O. On the very same board. On the top of a roof. There were like three dirty mattress on the ground and... that's it. They jumped and thanks God it endend good for both of them. Thats actually the only bit she is leading in the movie but if you pay attention carefully, she is around most of the time. (Y/n) is wild when she has the right companions.》
《 She doesn't look that.... silly.》
《 Dumb? She can be really idiotic when she has the right support. She teamed up with Ehren and Dave at some point, when I start to complain to Steve O and they made a lot of disasters.》
Conan shakes is head in disbelief, laughing softly. 《 But how did you meet her? She is in another business.》
《 Yes, she is a bass guitar player and an actress. An /actual/ actress.》 Again, is impossible for the people in studio to not laught. 《We met in 2016 at the MTV Video Music Awards. We spoke a lot during the after party with her and other two of the guys from the band. After that i bumped in her at least thee times a year at several events, especially for MTV... once she was touring in Tennessee and I was paying a visit to my family, so I decided to go to the concert and we ended drunked as skunks.》
《 And back to then, nothing happened?》
《 No. I can't even say that we were friends back to them. She was a jackass' fan in her teens and we only spoke about that every time. 》
Conan follow the entire speech, then he nods. 《 So, how it happened? 》
《 I was lucky》 , is the very first answer that comes out of Knox's mouth. 《 She is a really good friend of Steve O and Wee Man. They skates togheter when she is in town. When we decided to bring some fresh blood in the crew, Steve O mentioned her, but in the end we chose Rachel. She was pissed off, so Steve O brought her on the set at least twice a week even if he wasn't allowed because of covid safe precautions. In the end, we filmed some bits with her help and spending time togheter... you know... we have trailers and we are both adults so-》
《 Enough details, thanks》 Conan interrupts him, causing a trilling and loud laught from Johnny. 《 She looks classier that this.》
《 Nah, she is a trash bag. Not morally, (y/n) is a sweetheart and as I mentioned, she helped me so much during my recovery .... but she grown amoung her buddies. The only girl in a group of filthy rockers and you can tell she has no grace. Honestly, that's how she won me over. Being really mean. 》
《 Did she pranked the others on the set along with you?》
《 Everyone except Ehren. She felt sorry for him at least twice a day and refused to bully him. 》
Conan looks even more surprised. 《 So she pranked the Jackass guys. Wasn't a fan?》
《 because she is a fan she enjoys so much pricking around!》 Other laught and then Johnny's tune becomes softer. 《 To be honest, she has a lot of empathy and she was already part of the family even before I realised it. You know after two divorces, it is not simply to just move on. She makes me feel younger and ... I dont know... like I'm good enough for something, at last.》
《 That's almost romantic from you.》
《 The keyword is almost. 》
《 Speaking about feeling younger.... you two have few years in between, right?》
《 Yes .... a couple....》, Johnny replies with tons of sarcasm. 《 Thats the very last of our problems. I dont know if its okay because she is mature or because I'm childish but trust me, it works sweet. It was hard to convince her father that it wasn't a prank, but after that everything came off without and hitch.》
Conan can't help himself but slap the table, chuckling. 《 He thought she was joking?》
《 Yes!》 Is Johnny's exclamation, estatic 《 She pranks her family all the time so they thought it was just another joke. Also because I'm only like five years younger than her dad.》
《 Are you serious??》
《 Like a stroke, Conan. And I can tell you: never mess up with an angry father if you are dating his little girl. The situation was worse then expected for the first half an hour. I honestly missed that bull while I was confronting mr (y/l/n)!》
Plot: Y/N and Johnny’s daughter suddenly talks about an imaginary friend of hers that sounds a bit too familiar to her parents.
Warnings: None
"John?", Y/N asks and her husband turns around in his chair, he watches her stand in the doorframe. A nervous expression covers her features, one he promptly mirrors. "What's wrong?", he asks and furrows his eyebrows in skepticism.
She swallows thickly before she turns her head left and right, as if she was checking out if someone was eavesdropping then she steps into Johnny's office. She shuts the door behind her slowly and quietly. After taking one last deep breath, Y/N glances at him.
“Daisy is talking about him again."
She doesn’t have to say anything else, Johnny's nervous smile drops as soon as the sentence abandons her lips: "Are you sure?"
"Oh yeah. And... and it's like getting weirder and weirder."
"What do you mean it’s getting weirder?", he inquires and she notices how a specific amount of terror flashes up in his eyes.
"Well, for starters he apparently convinced her that time is a social construct.", the y/h/c woman clarifies and watches how Johnny's eyes widen slightly.
"Oh god.", he mumbles.
A few months ago, their four-year-old daughter had started talking about an imaginary friend of hers. Which initially wasn't a weird thing, children were having them all the time. Y/N was often talking to other parents about that kind of stuff, and they were telling her about their children's make-believe ‘friends’.
For example, Daisy’s classmate Joline was having tea parties with a seven feet tall flamingo. Who had four legs and a British accent. Y/N recalls how her mother was turning a dark shade of red in the beginning, appearing somewhat ashamed about her daughter's ‘friend’.
"I'm sorry.", she said, running her hand through her hair before making a quick hand motion to brush it off: "You must think I am deranged." But the other mother just smiled and shook her head: "No, I would never judge your daughter for something like that.”
Compared to Daisy’s made-up friend that flamingo sounded like the fluffy dream of any parent. Because Daisy’s invisible playmate happens to be a middle-aged man who is missing a tooth.
"And then.", Daisy said and looked at her parents with enthusiasm in her little green eyes. "I'm scared to ask.", Johnny muttered through gritted teeth, while still smiling at his daughter. "What, honey. What did he do?"
"He puked into the teacup and then he drank it all up again!", at this point their daughter was a giggling mess. Meanwhile, Y/N and Johnny just stared at her in shock and confusion.
"She just spends too much time around you guys.", Johnny explains while he looks around:” You cannot come over ever again.”
It is Chris' birthday and the long-time friends are all sitting around the campfire.
"Am I the only - wait, I have never met her before.", Dave says and Jason who sits next to him wrinkles his forehead. "Really? How did you manage to do that … We are virtually always drinking at Johnny's place."
Weeman scoffs while a smile plays on his lips: "Maybe it's just a reminder, that she's your daughter, Johnny."
Chris who walks out of the bungalow and up to his friends takes a sip of his beer: "What are you guys talking about?"
"Daisy's imaginary friend."; Johnny explains and shakes his head before he goes on: "The worst thing about the whole thing is, she swears he's not even imaginary. She says that he is a real person."
"Does he have a name?"
"It's a secret, Papa.", Johnny says in a high-pitched voice, mimicking his precious little girl:” He comes and he goes.” At that his friends all laugh.
A few minutes later the doorbell goes off and Chris stands up again before he disappears into the building.
“Perhaps Daisy is seeing a ghost.”, Steveo lets out and everyone (except Dave) grumbles:” What?!”
Dave nods his head:” Steveo’s right, children notice things we can’t. They-.” “Stop it.”, Johnny cuts his friend off with a sharp hand gesture:” My child is not able to see spirits! You’re being ridiculous.”
“Dad!”, a loud voice exclaims, and when the men turn their heads they watch how Daisy walks through the sliding doors into the garden. Y/N and Chris are close behind.
But then she abruptly stops walking. For a few minutes, she just stares at the men.
Her eyes widen.
Y/N and Johnny exchange a nervous look. “Maybe she’s seeing the ghost again.”, Steveo whispers, and Johnny shushes him. Her small hand raises and her finger points towards the group.
Then a huge smile emerges on her lips.
“FRIEND!”, she shouts and her finger lands on Dave.
A suffocating silence falls upon the group. “Wha-What?!”, Dave asks and swallows thickly, before he turns around to look behind. Only to discover that Daisy was unquestionably pointing at him.
“You’re my daughter's imaginary friend?!”
——
“I have never met her before.”, Dave tells, an irritated expression is covering his face while Daisy has her arms around his torso. She is pushing her face directly into his abdomen, while she continues to say the word ‘friend’ over and over again. “Could you please stop doing that?” But the young girl just giggles at his request.
“I mean.”, Johnny starts and glances at Y/N:” He does fit the description. He is missing a tooth. And he is a middle-aged man. But do you think he’d puke into a teacup?”
“ I just don’t understand it. If he argues they never met then how- oh my god.” She puts her hand in front of her mouth before she looks back at Dave. The poor guy is sweating, and his hands are shaking slightly, while he struggles to gently push Daisy away. But her small hands are gripping onto his shirt for dear life.
Dave perks up and when he makes eye contact with Y/N all color drains off his face:” What? What’s wrong?”
“Darf!”, she merely says and Johnny runs a hand down his face before he bursts into laughter. “Daisy has been speaking about Darf this whole time!”
“I’m so happy she didn’t make those things up.”, Y/N lets out and lets out a pleased sigh followed by a chuckle:” Oh my god.”
“That’s it.”, Dave announces and slowly runs a hand down his face:”I’m never ever drinking again.”
The Johnny elevator smut was so hot omg. Can I request a smut with a fem reader where Bam’s having a bad day and he’s super frustrated so the reader kind of lets him take it out on her by having rough sex and then it’s fluffy at the end? Thank youuu
Release
[Bam Margera x F!Reader]
Desc: anon covered it!
A/n: glad you enjoyed going up!!! icl i do enjoy writing bam smut even tho this is kind of out of fic character but i do love dom x reader sometimes
warnings: smut (18+), p in v, sub/dom dynamics, use of safe word
1.9k words
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“Fuck!”
You heard a yell from the yard. Looking out the window you saw Bam slamming his board down on the ground, angry expression on his face. You observed the way he kicked it and mumbled incomprehensible things under his breath, unbeknownst to the fact you were watching him from a few feet away.
Bam was already pissed given the fact some asshole MTV exec had cut an entire episode of Viva La Bam, claiming it was “too vulgar for television”, as the email stated. You had to restrain him from writing a fairly strongly worded one back which only ticked him off more, resulting in him heading outside to skate though not even that was putting his mind at ease, only enraging him even further.
‘He’s quite hot when he’s angry.’ You thought, eyes drinking in his slim frame that was littered with tattoos.
You and Bam weren’t a thing, you guys were just friends. Well, friends that had quite a bit of pent up sexual tension. The feelings were only rising, perhaps even bursting, ready to be released. Released.
Bam pushed his hair off of his forehead, panting and glaring at the ground where his board lay when he glanced up to meet your stare from the dining room window. You didn’t look away immediately, instead prolonging the eye contact a little longer, a tiny smirk playing at your lips. Bam tore his eyes away, confused on why he was flustered all of a sudden but deciding to head back inside anyways.
“Hey.” You spoke as he shut the sliding doors with vigour.
“What are you still doing here?”
How polite.
“Dico said we’re watching a movie later, no point heading home.”
“Yeah well I’m not hanging out.”
And with that, he was out the door, stomping up to his room, only enticing you to follow him.
Your fist tapped lightly at the door.
“I said I’m not hanging out.” He wasn't yelling, but it was clear he wasn’t exactly very happy either.
You opened the door despite his protests, leading Bam to glare at you as he put on a fresh shirt.
“What’s your problem?!” He spat.
“I don't think I’m the one with the problem.”
“Can't you just fuck off? I’m already pissed about those fucking assholes in suits, do you want me to be pissed at you too?!”
“Well about that.”
Bam narrowed his brows as you walked closer to him, hands behind your back.
“I have an idea.”
Bam looked you up and down, completely clueless as to what you were going to suggest but still hoping deep down it would be what his dreams entailed.
“Why don’t you take your anger out on me?”
“What like fucking yell at you or something?”
He wasn't catching on, you smirked.
“No, not exactly.”
You stepped forward, slightly closing the gap between the two of you, seductive eyes looking into his. You lifted your arms up to wrap around Bam’s neck, his breath hitching and cheeks flushing at the close contact.
“Other ways.” You whispered.
“So you want me to fuck you?”
You smiled at the frankness, moving your face closer so your lips were brushing his, just about.
“Well I know you've wanted me for a while, and I’ve wanted you too, and you’re angry. What better way to release than to fuck my brains out?”
“Are you fucking with me?” Bam’s voice was low and shaky, unsure.
You leaned in and pressed your lips into his, grabbing his chin as you did so before pulling his face away, his eyes forcing back open.
“What do you think?”
Bam slammed his lips back onto yours, his hands already grabbing at your hips to pull you flush against his body, mouths and teeth clashing the rougher he went. You let him push you onto his bed, his hands already unbuckling his belt with desperate speed.
“You want me to take everything out on you I fucking will. Take your clothes off.”
Despite your previous mannerisms of being all confident and domineering, this power shift sent vibrations down to your core, excited that Bam was already willing to take the reins and fuck you as hard as you both needed. You swiftly removed your shirt and shimmied your pants down your legs, leaving you in just your underwear. Bam had his hand down his boxers, shirtless and pumping himself to get hard, watching you splayed out on the bed for him.
“I said take your fucking clothes off.” He spat lowly, a completely new personality taking over.
It dawned on you he meant your underwear and so you slowly bent your arm around to unclasp your bra, letting it fall forward to reveal your tits.
“Hurry the fuck up.”
Bam had no intentions of enjoying this show you were putting on, instead lurching forward to rip your panties off, throwing the ruined pair on the ground and pushing his fingers inside of you with no warning.
You let out a surprised moan, jolting up to rest on your elbows as his index and middle worked in and out of you at a rapid pace, your body convulsing as it adapted to the sudden pleasure.
“Give me a safe word.” Bam said, not giving up on working you up.
Your head had lulled back, too dazed out from his movements to understand what he had said until he stopped, fingers pulling straight out of you.
“Give me a safe word or I stop.”
“Oklahoma.” is all you said before you felt Bam’s warm spit drip onto your cunt, fingers dipping into your folds.
You let out a breathy moan as he slipped inside of you once again, thumb pushing against your clit while his other hand gripped your waist to make you hold still. Your back arched as Bam’s finger began making curling upwards, hitting the spot you needed him to, your legs beginning to close.
“Keep them fucking open.”
Bam used the hand that had been holding your waist to force your thighs open, thumb pressing into the soft flesh as you continued to squirm. As you were brought closer and closer to the edge, he removed his fingers abruptly, a string of his spit and your slick coating them. You let out a disappointed whimper from the lack of contact but it was quickly hushed by Bam’s wet fingers being shoved in your mouth. You moaned against them, sucking lightly to taste yourself on them. Bam removed them shortly, kicking his boxers off and clambering on top of you, hard dick pressing into your thigh.
“You wanted me to use you right?”
You nodded, eyes looking into his with lust-filled wonder.
“Get on your hands and knees then.”
You bit your lip and complied, doggy style wasn't something you were used to but you were more than willing to partake in it if it meant hot dom Bam. Bam sat back on his knees as you moved into position, lining up with your core as soon as you were ready. He pushed into you quickly, barely giving a moment to adjust before he was slamming into you, hips snapping. He brought his hand to wrap around your throat, pulling you up by it so your ass could press firmly against him as he fucked you, the feeling still sore.
“This what you wanted? This feel fucking good?” Bam was panting, rough fucking wearing him out already.
You struggled to respond with his tight hand squeezing your throat ever so lightly but lord did he feel good. Bam let go of your neck then, your face plummeting forward into the pillows that muffled your moans. He moved his hands to your hips, grabbing them and pulling you back towards him as he continued to move his hips at the fastest pace you’d ever been fucked.
As you left your face to press into the soft linen to suppress your noises, Bam wrapped his hand in your hair, tugging you up and moving his torso forward to speak into your ear.
“I said, does this feel good?” He whispered sternly, the low voice sending shivers down your spine.
“Y- Yes.” You whined out, mind fogging from the pleasure.
“Fucked out already.” He laughed almost sadistically, hips not letting up as he dropped your hair, pushing the side of your face into the mattress.
“Fuck those fucking fuckers in suits.” He babbled incoherently, laying out all of his frustrations onto you as he fucked you.
“Do you want my cum inside of you?”
Your face was being held down by Bam’s strong hand but you could hear his question still. You nodded, eyes screwed shut, nearing your orgasm as well.
“Fucking come for me first then. Need to feel that cunt tighten.”
You moaned as the vulgar words poured from his mouth, his fingers wrapping around to attack your clit. You lifted your head from where Bam had shoved you down after his hand moved, stifling your moans with the back of your own hand.
“No, no. Lemme hear you. It turns me on.” Bam grasped your hair again, pulling you up to force you to let out your noises.
You were at the edge almost immediately what with Bam’s fingers moving at such a vigorous pace.
“I’m gonna come.” You exclaimed in a moan, eyes beginning to water.
Bam responded with nothing, only fucking you harder as you came around him, letting out the most pornographic moan you had ever heard yourself release, tears running down your cheek.
“Fuck yeah. You’re so fucking tight.”
Bam’s hand dropped from your core but his fucking never let up. In fact, his free hand could now resume its place on your hips, allowing him to shove you back on his cock even harder. You were insanely sensitive given the fact you had came just seconds previous and Bam’s speed was becoming too much to bear.
“Bam, slow- slow down.” You whimpered as he let go of your hair, head lulling forward.
“What was that? I can't hear you.” Bam mocked, clearly no sympathy to be had.
“It’s too much. Please just-”
“Safe word or I keep going.”
You paused. Although the overstimulation was hard to deal with, nothing in you wanted Bam to stop his movements and so you stayed silent.
“That's what I thought. Take it like a slut.”
Despite his cocky remarks, Bam’s hips were beginning to stutter and his thrusts were at a more erratic pace. He was close.
“Gonna come in your pretty little cunt. You want that?”
You nodded through moans as the overstimulation turned to just stimulation. Bam squeezed your hips tightly, his thumbs sure to leave bruises as he dragged you down all the way, burying himself deep inside of you as he came with a load groan. You whimpered as you felt him release, finally release.
Bam pulled out of you shortly after but still held you up, bending down to examine his cum that started to leak out of you.
“Fucking beautiful.” He whispered as he pushed a finger inside of you again before you swatted your hand back.
“Enough, jesus enough.”
Bam laughed and complied, letting your body drop to lie on your side, your cheeks a bright red. He smiled as he moved closer to your face, planting a kiss on your lips.
“You good? I didn't go too far or anything did I?”
You shook your head, kissing him back.
“Just what I wanted. You feel better?”
He nodded back, wiping the wetness off your cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.
“Gotta do that more often.” He grinned and so did you.
Hii I just wanted to say I absolutely love your writing it’s so good and I was wondering if you could write something with Steve-o on how a new girl comes to the set of jackass and he starts ignoring you and always around her but when he sees you hanging out with someone else (maybe Ryan or Bam) he gets really jealous
The Workplace Flirt
[Steve-o x F!Reader]
Desc: combined two requests for this one! set during early 2000s so MTV steve-o
A/n: hope this ends the steve-o drought for you guys <3 also ik steph was never really new but i wasn’t bothered to make an oc so the loml will suffice. also i don’t really love writing steve-o so sorry if it’s a bit shit lmao i don’t think i really hit the last request that well…
Warnings: smut (18+), p in v, mentions of alcohol
2.2k words
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You and Steve-O had a... complicated relationship. By ‘relationship’ you meant being coworkers and by ‘complicated’ you mean him trying to get in your pants every minute. He was persistent, you’d give him that but eventually it would just get pretty irritating. His relentless flirting drove you up the walls and would only get worse when he was drinking which was pretty much all of the time.
“Hey pretty lady.” He’d slur, beer in one hand as his other arm slid sleazily around your shoulder.
“Leave me alone Steve, I’m trying to work.”
“Now why are you the only one who calls me Steve?” He’d spit the last word out like it was some disgusting piece of food.
“Cause’ that’s your name.”
He’d roll his eyes.
“You should loosen up a bit. Always got something up your ass.”
“That’s rich coming from the dude that constantly has something up his.”
He laughed at that.
“See, you can be funny when you wanna be. You gotta get in front of the camera now.”
You just shook your head, still attempting to shove his arm off of you.
“Not happening.”
“Well I know I’d definitely want you in front of a camera, doing other things.”
“Alright that’s enough.” Finally he’d be shoved off of you.
“Sex stuff.”
“Yeah I gathered that much Steve.”
You had to admit, having a little admirer on set did make things a little more interesting. Every day you’d come in curious as to what outlandish thing Steve-o would say to you to desperately try to pull you. It wasn’t that he was ugly or anything, in fact you actually found him pretty cute but rejecting his advances just felt like principle after doing it a million times. After all, you were only a camera op trying to do your job.
However the routine you were used to was flipped on its head when you returned to set after a new addition was added to the cast. Stephanie Hodge was a model friend of Johnny’s whom he invited to join the show when it became too much of a sausage fest. She was super sweet and kind and you guys hit it off right away but one thing was, she was absolutely stunning so naturally caught the eye of practically every guy on set. Every guy including Steve-o...
It’s not like you were jealous or resentful of her or anything like that but a little part of you seethed at the fact your usual work lover was no longer falling over his feet over you. You never thought you’d miss the idiot bugging you as you tried to set up your camera every morning, whispering stupid things in your ear and trying his damndest to take you out but alas, here you were grinding your teeth and tapping your foot looking over at the drunk talking animatedly at the new girl in town.
“You alright there?”
You were snapped out of your daze by a familiar voice.
“Oh, uh yeah I’m just uh- setting up.”
Ryan tried to hide his smirk but failed at doing so as you noticed the slight upturn of his lips.
“What?”
He shook his head, smiling.
“Oh nothing. So what d’ya think of Steph?”
“Oh she’s great! She’s gonna be really funny I already know it.”
Ryan nodded, still smirking.
“What?!” You punched him in the arm, trying to squeeze out whatever he was obviously hiding from you.
“No, nothing! It’s just... you seem sort of jealous is all.”
You paused for a moment before scoffing dramatically.
“Jealous?! Of- of who?!”
Ryan shook his head again, grinning.
“Dunno, just seems like maybe you’re missing your little Steve-O following you around like a lost puppy.”
You rolled your eyes as over the top as you could.
“Miss?! God no, if anything it’s a relief not having him here. We’re gonna be like way ahead today cause’ I’ll actually be ready to shoot on time.”
Ryan bit his lip, still grinning from ear to ear.
“Whatever you say.”
He walked off, leaving you to dwell in your thoughts of brewing jealousy.
Once lunch arrived you ended up at the catering table at the same time as your ‘ex’ admirer. The whole morning he’d been laughing and chatting to Steph who actually seemed kind enough to give him the time of day. He barely looked up when you brushed elbows, focusing too heavily on piling two plates up with food.
“Hey.” You spoke, possibly the first time you’d ever initiated conversation with Steve, just out of curiosity you supposed.
“Hey.”
He didn’t even bother making eye contact when he responded, almost as if it was deliberate.
“Who’s the other plate for?”
You weren’t really sure why you were asking, you already knew the answer.
“Steph.” is all he said before walking off in the opposite direction, leaving you slightly bewildered at this sudden swap of character.
How had he managed to make you the one desperate for his attention?
As the days passed your resentment only grew, the other guys beginning to notice how you would shoot daggers with your eyes at the two love birds from across set, not on purpose of course. You couldn’t help but feel almost neglected, change not being your favourite thing to deal with. Well, only change in some ways as the newest shift in your life was rather welcomed.
Since your loss of the buzzcut-having idiot, a new person had strolled in to fill in his shoes as the one to annoy you as you worked. Well, not necessarily annoy, you rather enjoyed having Ryan around to talk to you. He wasn’t trying quite as desperately to get in your pants, in fact his flirting was far more subtle.
The more Ryan was around, the less you seemed to care about Steve-O and Steph. Every morning he’d head over to where you were setting up and start talking.
“Hey, I listened to that band you were telling me about the other day, they’re really great actually.” Ryan told you, handing over a cup of coffee he got.
“See I told you they’d be your thing! If they come to LA or Philly we should go.”
As you chatted away you began to notice a pair of eyes trained on you, an angry glare glazed over them. Steve-O had his fists clenched tightly as well as his jaw, looking as pissed as ever. You tried to ignore him and continue your conversation but you still found yourself getting distracted as the man-child stormed off in a huff.
‘What the fuck is he so mad for?’ You thought. All this time he appeared to have completely moved on from you and now suddenly he was all bitter about you simply talking with Ryan?! That doesn't seem fucking fair! You had always passed Steve-O off as the one jackass who would consistently ‘harass’ you but now after these games were going on it dawned on you; was there something there? Underneath this simple little routine you had formerly developed, had there always been some real emotions? You swallowed that down like a large pill, uncomfortably stuck in your throat. Fuck.
Before you knew it, filming was over and Tremaine was hosting the wrap party at his house, inviting the entire cast and crew. You dressed up pretty nice for it, sporting a short skirt and low cut top, if it wasn’t to impress Ryan it may have been for... you know who.
The night was pretty great, getting to be intoxicated with your co-workers is always a privilege and you and Ryan were pretty much stuck together for the whole night. You also took notice to Steve glued to Steph as per usual but even still after all this time it didn't seem like either of you had actually gotten anywhere with your new partners. In fact a lot of the conversations you were having seemed to be held while your eyes were drifting in search of the other.
“I really fucked up my back on that one, which was stupid cause’ it was already fucked up.”
You nodded along to Ryan’s story while sipping your vodka coke, Steve-O and Steph in the corner of your eye sitting on the other couch. You chewed at your straw absentmindedly, the jealousy simmering in your heart as he slung his arm around her.
“Go talk to him.”
Your attention was taken away.
“What?”
Ryan shook his head, smirking.
“To Steve-O. This is what it’s been all about, just get it over with already before you don’t see him for another six months.”
You shook your head in disbelief.
“I don't-”
“Its fine, really, I get it.” He gave you a genuine smile before getting off the couch towards Bam and the others. You sat in silence for a moment before looking up towards Steve-O, his eyes already boring into you even with Stephanie chatting away. Fuck it.
You pushed yourself off the couch and beelined straight towards the man who was already looking at you, a puzzled expression on his face.
“Sorry Steph could I talk to Steve for a second?”
You stood in front of the pair, the alcohol making everything a little less daunting.
“Yeah, of course.”
You smiled politely back at Steph before beckoning her partner to follow you.
“What do you want?” He tried asking you but you had no response, only booming through Jeff’s house searching for a vacant room.
Eventually you found a guest bedroom and guided Steve inside, closing the door behind him.
“What is going-” He was cut off by your lips slamming onto his, hands clutching at his face as you did what sober you could never dream of.
It took Steve-O a moment to register what the hell had happened, but when he did he did not hold back. His mouth moved equally as eagerly, hands already gripping your waist and pushing you against the door. You pulled away for a moment just to take off your top, going right back to it afterwards, slowly edging towards the bed.
Once the back of Steve’s legs hit the mattress you both fell onto it, him settling you to straddle him, his hands slyly moving up to your tits. Everything following moved fast, the remainder of your clothes were off and on the floor in a matter of minutes and before you knew it your legs were straddling over his crotch, him slowly pushing up into you.
You winced as he did so, eyes flashing up to meet his, the first time you had actually done that during your whole encounter. You were met with a look of almost adoration as he finally felt you, about a years worth of pent up hunger being fulfilled right then. You shut your eyes and brought your forehead up to rest against his own, his hands ghosting over your flesh.
“What changed?” Steve-O whispered as you bottomed out, low whimpers leaving your lips.
You smiled, lifting your head up to look at him, beginning to move.
“Maybe I missed you trying to get into my pants, had to let you in myself.”
He laughed too.
“Good to know my hard work paid off.”
You shook your head as you moved yourself up and down, laughing while panting. Steve helped you out, holding your waist and bucking his own hips forward, in time with your movements.
Soon you were properly fucking, both of you exchanging moans and low noises while you tried to keep quiet as there was a work party going on right outside the unlocked door. Something about the riskiness of it all excited you, egging you on to be a little louder to add to the thrill. He tried to keep you quiet with his lips but you continued to pull away and smirk as you moaned quite outwardly.
“You want us to get caught?” He muttered and you smiled.
“Would that be so terrible?”
Steve-O just shook his head.
“One minute you're trying to get rid of me when I'm flirting with you and next you want everyone on set to hear you moan while I fuck you”
You laughed.
“I think it's more me fucking you.”
“Oh fuck off.”
You both laughed before Steve grabbed your hips and began moving you faster. You continued to let out noises of pleasure before you felt that feeling in your stomach begin to tighten. You gave no warning before you were coming on his cock, the tightening of your cunt urging Steve to the edge as well.
“Fuck, where do you want me to come?”
“I’m on the pill.” You whispered.
Steve held onto your hips tightly, pushing you down before finishing inside of you with a loud moan. A moan that could’ve been heard from outside.
By the time you had gotten off of Steve-O and put your clothes back on he was still oogling you as he remained on the bed.
“What?” You laughed, fixing your shoes.
“Oh nothing, I just never thought that would actually happen.”
You both shared a chuckle.
“So all that stuff with Steph...”
He shook his head.
“I was just trying to make you jealous, she’d never go out with me anyways.”
“Well I guess it worked.” You smiled and Steve did too.
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Would you write a smut about a fem reader who’s super turned on by Bam’s tattoos? Thank you!
The Tattoo [Bam Margera x F!Reader Smut]
part two
Desc: You’re a medic on the set of Jackass and you fucking hate Bam Margera. Though when patching him up you get sort of flustered at a certain tattoo.
A/n: Thank you for the request! Sorry i kind of went my own way with this and considered the tattoos a prompt rather than the focal point of the work but i hope you still like it! As always not beta read and ignore inaccuracies (:
Warnings: Smut (18+), Hate sex, oral m!recieving, p in v
2.5k words
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It was pretty fun being a medic on the set of Jackass. It was a boys club sure, bar the couple of female producers and crew members that worked there with you but something about being the young, attractive female medic made the guys love you. Instead of shouting “Medic!” at every injury, they’d yell “Nurse Y/n!” despite your “I’m not a nurse!” complaints. Nonetheless, you loved your job, especially since there was never a dull moment on set and you were kept pretty busy.
Although Johnny and Steve-o were your primary patients, Bam Margera had become somewhat of a regular the more skating stunts he performed. This had become sort of an issue because, well, you fucking hated Bam Margera. You got along with all of the other guys just fine, in fact you were also pretty good friends with the rest of the CKY crew but something about that blue eyed dickhead grinded your gears. He was always a nuisance to have on set, trying to annoy and distract you from your work at every possible moment. He made it his life’s mission to wind you up and piss you off and boy did he succeed in doing so! You weren’t shy in hiding your hatred for Bam, taking to dramatically groaning whenever he walked into your tent that production had set up for you. The other guys insisted Bam just had this massive crush on you and that’s why he tried to get your attention so often, god how old is he? ten? Anyways, you wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole.
Bam lay down, his head slightly raised, examining you wiping the blood off his abdomen. He had just done this idiotic shirtless skate stunt that ended in him eating shit and getting semi-impaled by a piece of wood jutting out of wherever he was skating. That’s how he ended up in your tent, unfortunately. “Why don’t you wear a sexy nurse costume to work Y/n? It would make this whole thing a lot easier.” You rolled your eyes, biting back a witty remark. You wouldn’t let him wind you up today. You bit your lip as you cleaned him roughly, your hand pretty close to his iconic heartagram tattoo above his crotch. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find his tattoos wildly attractive. It was pretty juvenile of you, it’s not like you hadn’t been with people who were tatted before, but something about Bam’s ink made you feel different. Maybe it was because you hated him so much, any minor attraction was heightened by the fact you would never act on it. You accidentally brushed your fingers against the tattoo, swallowing quickly. Bam noticed you had gotten pretty flustered, a sly grin appearing on his face. He spoke your name in a suggestive, questioning manner, trying his best to meet eye contact with you but you refused to look up, rooting through your bag to look for your bandages. “Hmm?” You hmmmed through gritted teeth and tight lips. “Are you good?” He smiled some more, raising his brow and leaning up on his elbows, letting his jeans slip down his hips a bit, revealing even more of his tattoo. You cleared your throat awkwardly, your eyes clearly panning quickly down to take it in. Bam laughed outwardly now, sitting up despite your protests that you still had to fix him up. All this time you were anxiously avoiding his gaze, fearing what his face would look like if you saw it. Bam lifted your chin up by his fingers, his thumb resting on the dimple of your chin, forcing you to look at him. He had a shit eating grin on his face. You gave a disapproving look but didn’t try to pull away at first. “Y/n did you wanna ask me something?” You narrowed your eyes, genuinely confused at this suggestion. “What are you talking about?” You asked, this time not shying away from looking right at him.
With his other hand, Bam picked up your wrist from where it lay on your lap, clutching it gently then in a low voice he whispered, fairly close to your face, “Do you wanna touch my tattoo Y/n?” He smirked when he said it, knowing what effect this was going to have on you. You decided to play dumb, snatching your wrist away from his grip and avoiding eye contact once more to take a bottle of alcohol from your bag to disinfect the small wound. “Shut the fuck up Bam.” Bam laughed cockily, “Did I touch a nerve?” He then winced, hissing through his teeth when you pressed a drenched cotton pad of alcohol onto his abdomen roughly. “Ow! God, didn’t know you were into that pain stuff Nurse.” You shot Bam a disgusted look. “Try be professional for once in your life Margera.” You wiped the injury again, still pretending not to be wholly turned on by that stupid fucking tattoo. You crossed your legs tightly in an attempt to mask your horniness but Bam spotted this almost immediately. “Nurse Y/n…” He lulled suggestively, making you scoff and shake your head, getting the bandages ready to finally be done with him. He sat up some more to get closer to your face. “You know if you wanna fuck me you can just ask?”
This was the last straw, you threw your stuff onto the floor and looked him straight in the eyes, you let yourself be provoked by this arrogant bastard. “If you couldn’t tell, I’m at fucking work right now. Not that you’d know, probably never lifted a finger a day in your life.” Bam’s smile only grew at your frustration, you were giving him what he wanted. You resumed, “So maybe be professional and grow the f-“ You were cut off when Bam crashed his lips against yours abruptly, your eyes growing wild when you realised what had just happened. You pulled away, shock painted on your face. “So..?” Bam asked, a look of slight concern was hidden behind his cheeky smirk. You remained silent for what felt like years until you gave in to your girlish urges and grabbed his face to kiss him back.
You made out hard and fast, Bam sleazily slipping his tongue in far too quick, his teeth bashing against yours because of how rough he was being. You pulled away for a moment, “You’re a terrible kisser.” you spat before going straight back in. Bam laughed into your mouth, “Even when we’re making out you’re being a bitch to me.” He whispered, going right back to it afterwards. His hands were on your hips now, snaking down to grab your ass. He then lifted you up onto his lap so you were straddling him, continuing to fondle your ass. He pulled away properly now, “You like my tattoos Y/n?” He asked, brushing some hair away from your neck. You nodded now, it was too far gone to pretend you weren’t incredibly horny over some ink. Bam took your hand and pressed it against the heartagram, you rubbed it softly but it wasn’t enough. You got up off the rickety medic bed and kneeled between Bam’s legs. He laughed as his face turned redder by the second. You kissed the centre of the tattoo and licked it quickly. “God Y/n, when’d you get so fucking dirty?” You glared at Bam from below him before getting to work on his stupid heartagram belt. “You’re fast.” Bam’s witty remark was followed by a groan when you grabbed his semi-hard cock through his jeans. “Keep that up and I’ll bite your dick off Margera.” Bam cleared his throat, “Yes Ma’am.”
You pulled his jeans down as much as you needed before pulling his dick out. You tried not to whimper upon seeing it, you still had to have some dignity left after you were done with him. You spit on the tip and started pumping him teasingly slow, earning a few whimpers from Bam. You then took his tip in your mouth, tracing it with your tongue and tasting the precum that now filled your mouth. “God you’re such a fucking tease, do you know that?” You narrowed your brows before taking him in all the way, that shut him up nicely. Despite your best efforts, you couldn’t deep throat Bam all the way and Bam could tell you were getting frustrated. “What’s the matter babe? Can’t fit all of me in?” You glared at him again, this time letting your teeth graze his dick as a sort of warning. Bam grabbed a fistful of your hair, pulling you off him. “Ay, play nice.” Bam then gathered your hair into a makeshift ponytail and shifted up on the bed to get a good angle. You wrapped your lips around his cock once more as Bam eased you gently down. Eventually he got your mouth pressed against his base, humming in pleasure as you started gagging. You breathed through you nose as tears started to form and fall down your cheeks, the feeling of his dick at the back of your throat was becoming uncomfortable. You looked up at Bam who was biting his lip and giving you an almost sadistic look. It became apparent, Bam was not gonna let you up any time soon. “Nice hearing you shut the fuck up for once Y/n.” He laughed when your eyebrows narrowed. You murmured against his dick, the vibrations making Bam moan, only enjoying it more. “Does it feel good? You’re close to that tattoo you love so much now.” Bam was really loving the fact he could say whatever he wanted without you snapping back at him. You were beginning to struggle now, feeling your saliva drip down your chin and your mascara running. You slapped his thigh as a way of saying ‘let me the fuck up now.” “Just two more seconds.” Bam sighed, screwing his eyes tight, trying to prolong the moment a little longer. He let your hair go and you pulled off his dick immediately, breathing heavily. “Are you trying to fucking kill me Bam?” You wiped the dribble from your face and cleared your throat. “What a way to go it would be.” He laughed, earning him a smack on the knee.
You got up then, a little unsure of what to do next before Bam pulled you into him and kissed you. He fumbled with the bottom of your shirt so you pulled it off, letting him undo your bra and touch your boobs. “Nice tits.” He whispered after pulling away for a moment just to look at them. The whole thing was a little awkward given the fact Bam still had his dick out but the situation was fixed when Bam got off the bed and hoisted you onto it instead, slotting between your legs. Bam unbuttoned your pants blindly and helped you push them off your legs along with your panties, leaving both of you in the nude, Bam’s pants being kicked off onto the floor. It was very risky. I mean technically speaking anyone could walk in at any moment even if it was lunch but hopefully nobody would be maimed or seriously injured in the time it took for the two of you to bang. Bam held onto you hips as you continued making out. Using his other hand, he ran his fingers through your folds. “God you’re fucking soaked.” He pulled away to examine the slick left on his fingers. “Was it my tattoo that got you this wet baby.” You rolled your eyes despite the fact he was right. “Just fuck me already Bam.” He shrugged “Don’t have to tell me twice.” And with that he slid himself inside you.
You winced as he stretched you out, burying your nails into his shoulders to distract yourself from the pain. Bam stayed still for a second before slowly thrusting, trying to get you used to the feeling. Not before long, the pain turned to pleasure as your groans switched to moans. You pushed Bam’s waist into you forcefully as if it say ‘go faster’. He heard you out and started to pick up the pace, slamming his hips against yours. “Didn’t know you were such a fucking slut Y/n, getting fucked at work? You’re a fucking whore aren’t you?” In any other situation, you would’ve smacked Bam in the face, wanting him to shut the fuck up. But in this position, getting fucked by the guy you hated most, his dirty talk turned you on to no extent. “All for a tattoo is that right?” You nodded as you moaned, your eyes half lidded and slightly out of it. Bam grabbed your chin forcefully, making you look at him. “Answer me.” You moaned again, “Yes, fuck yes Bam.” Bam smiled sadistically, he had you at his mercy. This girl that despised him and yelled at him day in and day out was submitting to him. He held the small of your back and began ramming into you at a relentless pace. He grunted and groaned almost harmonising with your whiny noises. “You like getting fucked by me huh?” His degrading was getting sloppy as he felt himself get closer and closer to his climax. Not wanting to wait anymore he brought his thumb down to your clit and started rubbing it quick, attempting to bring you to edge with him. “Are you gonna cum for me Nurse Y/n?” You nodded your head dramatically, muttering a thousand yes’ under your breath. Bam grabbed your throat with his other hand. “Go on.” With that you orgasmed loudly, digging your nails into Bam’s back, not caring if anyone could hear you at this point. Soon after, Bam pulled out and came on your stomach, you winced at the feeling of it painting you.
You both remained in silence again, just your panting breaths filling the room. The embarrassment of what had just happened sunk into you. How the fuck did he get you to submit to him?! You got up quickly, finding a rag to clean Bam’s cum off of you and wiping your heat with it briefly. Bam continued to look at you, not bothering to get dressed himself as you struggled to get your jeans on, your panties uncomfortably wet. “Can you get your clothes on and get out of here before someone walks in?!” You spat, throwing Bam’s jeans at him. “Unbelievable” He scoffed, shaking his head. You glared at him, pulling your shirt back over your head. “What? You think just because you made me cum I’m gonna be all nice to you now?” You tried your best to fix your hair and makeup in the shitty mirror in the corner of the tent. “No no, it’s not that.” You looked back at Bam with a ‘what are you talking about?’ look. “It’s just…” Bam gestured at his abdomen. “You didn’t even bandage me up.” You looked at his injury and sure enough he was right. Because of all the excitement you forgot to actually do what you were supposed to. Though you hated the kid, you laughed, and so did he.
Hey, would you write a Ryan Dunn fic where Ryan and the reader have been friends since the cky days and the reader is their photographer and has been taking pictures of them forever and eventually becomes like the official photographer for jackass but her favourite person to take pictures of is Ryan and there’s all this tension between them because they’re best friends and neither realizes they’re totally in love with one another, and the tension builds until they have sex and confess to being in to one another
Photos Of You [Ryan Dunn x F!Reader]
Desc: Anon covered it all!
A/n: i LOVE this ask thank you sm!🫶🫶 tbh this didn’t end up in the direction i thought it would but hope you enjoy anyways!
warnings: smut (18+), p in v, public sex (sort of)
2.2k words
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“Smile!” You jeered, snapping a candid of Ryan and Johnny shoving and punching each other. “Hey you didn’t get my good side!” Johnny complained, pushing Dunn off of him and wandering over to you. “Could never shoot you bad PJ.” He laughed and threw his arm around your shoulder, guiding you away from Ryan and the rest of the crew. “You’re too kind sweetheart. So listen, are we gonna address the elephant in the room or what?” You narrowed your brows and laughed awkwardly. “What elephant?” Johnny took his arm off of you and turned to face you, raising his brows. “C’mon. The Ryan Dunn shaped elephant.” You laughed breathily. “What about Ryan?” Johnny took his bottom lip between his teeth and smiled. “Seems like the only time I see you snapping with this thing is when it’s with him.” He grabbed the lens of your camera and you scoffed. “That’s barely true. I shoot everyone!” Johnny shook his head, “Big Brother editors have to scour to find a picture you took without Ryan.” You rolled your eyes. “Alright so what? You getting camera jealous Knox?” You elbowed him in the ribs playfully. “Nah that’s not what this is about.” Johnny moved closer to you and spoke low. “You love him don’t you?” You laughed dramatically, trying to overshadow the pink that was beginning to spread across your cheeks. “Are you on something? No I don’t love Ryan.” Johnny tutted. “Alright plead the fifth. I’m just saying since it’s right in front of everyone’s eyes. And I don’t believe it’s one sided either.” You bit your lip. “Well what do you mean by that?” Johnny grinned stupidly. “Knew it.” He began walking towards the crew again laughing as you chased him down. “No, no. That does not mean I love him! I just wanna know what you mean!” Johnny kept looking in front of him, shaking his head. “You’re unbelievable.”
Johnny wasn’t wrong. About 90% of your work was Ryan but that wasn’t your fault. He was just so beautiful to photograph. You could never take a bad picture of him, his cute button nose and his curly hair, blond or brunet it looked good. But you weren’t in love with him or anything. You had known Ryan for years, what with being the designated photographer for the CKY crew and Jackass now that they landed a movie deal. You guys were best friends and had been forever. It was only natural you were more drawn to photograph him than the others. That’s what you told yourself anyhow.
“Hey.” You spoke, not looking up from your computer as you greeted the blond walking into your room at Bam’s house. “Whatcha doing?” He asked throwing himself onto the bed. “Come take a look at these shots, they’re just for the Jackassworld site but I think they’re cool.” Ryan pushed himself off of your mattress and leaned down to take a look, his head resting on your shoulder. “Nice.” He muttered as you showed him. “That’s a good one of you.” You pointed out a specific one of him with his curly hair all messy, a pair of aviators framing his face. “They’re all good ones of me.” You laughed but he was honestly right. “You’re easy to shoot.” Ryan kissed your cheek roughly to make you laugh, “You flattering me to get in my pants cam girl?” You rolled your eyes. “Cam girl? Really?” He laughed and plonked down on the bed once more. “Yeah, new nickname I’m trying out. You like it?” You spun yourself around on your office chair and shook your head. “Not my favourite.”
You admired your best friend lying nonchalantly on your bed and your head began swarming with Johnny’s words from a couple days prior. “Johnny said something funny to me the other day.” The words fell out of your mouth before you even considered them. “Oh?” Ryan urged you to continue. “Yeah. He insisted I must be in love with you since I shoot you so much. Isn’t that weird?” You laughed awkwardly but the joke wasn’t really funny. “Huh.” Ryan said, narrowing his brows, silence now filling the room. You fidgeted with your hands. “Well are you?” You looked up, confused at the rather bold question. “What?” Ryan scooted to the edge of the bed. “Are you in love with me cam girl?” He stretched out the love word mockingly and you shook your head laughing. “No I’m not in love with you. Sorry to bruise your ego. Why? You in love with me? Cause’ Johnny also insinuated it may be reciprocated.” You moved your brows up and down jokingly as Ryan laughed and shook his head as well. “Can’t say I am.” You regretted ever bringing up Johnnys words as now tension was building. Tension you hated and never wanted to address. So you didn’t, you bathed in it for months.
It was promo time for Jackass: The Movie and as the official Jackass photographer you were stringed along with the boys. Unfortunately much of it involved sitting in a chair uncomfortably while the crew did press, bored out of your mind. You sat in on one interview with Ryan, Bam, Chris and Steve-o from behind the camera, sipping on a bitter black coffee and making casual conversation with some lighting guy. You zoned out of the small talk to listen in on a question, it was about girls or something you presumed fro Chris and Steve-o’s giggly answers. And then it was Ryan. “I mean, yeah I guess I’ve gotten more girls since the show. Not a girlfriend or anything but yeah.” He said awkwardly, clearly a little uncomfortable. “And were they hotter than before fame?” The interviewer pushed, the other guys laughing awkwardly but Ryan just scratched the back of his head. His eyes flashed over to yours for just a second and you realised you probably looked like you’d been slapped in the face unintentionally. You weren’t sure why but Ry talking about other girls always made you feel a little uneasy. “Sure, I guess.” He spoke, clearing his throat right after. You poured the rest of the coffee down your throat and excused yourself to get more, walking off almost in a huff.
You cursed yourself for being so awkward about the whole thing, you probably made it so apparent that you were what, jealous? That was fucking stupid. You fumbled with the coffee pot as you heard the interviewer thank the guys and everyone get up to prepare for the next one. “Hey.” Behind you Ryan lingered. “Hey.” You replied, trying not to make eye contact just yet. “Can I talk to you?” Your cheeks started burning. “Yeah, what’s up?” You put the paper cup down and turned around to wait for him to say whatever he was going to say. Ryan looked almost more embarrassed than you, his nose a cute red. “Like in private.” You found that kind of weird seeing as there was no one around you that could possibly hear your conversation but shrugged anyways. “Okay.”
You followed Ryan into some green room, there was a thirty minute break until the next interview seeing as they had been doing them consecutively for a good few hours. He shut the door and you sat on the couch. “Are you okay?” You asked, Ryan had become even more jittery and nervous than he was a couple seconds before, he sat beside you. “Are we good?” You narrowed your brows and laughed nervously. “Well yeah, why wouldn’t we be?” He looked serious, quiet. “Ryan?” “I’ve been thinking about what you said about what Johnny said.” You scratched the back of your head and spoke lowly. “Oh.” The tension could be cut with a knife. “I’m tired of pretending it’s all fine.” Your face stiffened. Ryan looked at you dead in the eyes, “He’s right, I do love you. And I don’t know if you love me but-“ You cut him off with a kiss. Hands on the sides of his face, rough kiss. He reciprocated immediately, barely flinching. Your lips moved in sync and you moved over to be closer to him as his hands gripped your waist, fingers slipping under you shirt to touch your flesh. Your arms found themselves around his neck before Ryan leaned down to lay you on your back on the couch. His rough kisses continued before he pulled away and began kissing down your neck.
You whimpered softly as he nipped at it, sending shivers down your spine. “Ryan.” You muttered as he continued. “Ryan we’re in a fucking green room.” The man pulled away and grinned. “S’fine, I told some intern to not let anyone in.” You laughed, “What so you knew we were gonna fuck in here?!” Ryan laughed and kissed your neck again, “No, just thought the conversation was gonna map out a little longer than this.” You grinned but allowed him to continue, his hands moving down to rub you over your jeans, a bold move. You moaned and grabbed his shoulders in surprise. “Jesus, just fuck me they’ll need you again soon.” Ryan smiled stupidly, “So eager.” He unbuttoned you pants and helped you out of them before unbuckling his own and pulling them down enough so his dick could be free. He linked his fingers underneath the band of your panties and pulled them down quickly, still kissing your mouth and your neck. He began jacking himself off a bit after spitting into his hand to get himself a little harder before running his tip in between your folds. You moaned at the feeling before remembering where you were. Were you really gonna let Ryan fuck you for the first time in some random green room in LA? Then he pushed into you and the answer was clear, yes. You slapped your hand over your mouth to smother your noises but Ry moved it off of you, replacing it with his lips as he started to move. You moved your hand down to grip his waist as he fucked into you quickly. You weren’t expecting him to be so harsh for the first time but god you weren’t complaining. The passion was just what you needed as you moaned and whimpered into his mouth, the couch creaking under the weight and movements of the two of you. You pulled away from Ryan’s mouth to whisper one thing, “Harder.” He listened. It was proving more difficult to conceal your moans so Ryan resorted to putting his own hand over your lips. “Sssshhhh, you want the intern to hear me fuck you? Huh?” You shook your head, tear beginning to fall down your cheek from the pleasure.
“You love me?” You waited a moment before nodding your head. He took his hand off of your mouth and placed it on your cheek instead. “Yes.” You breathed out. He smiled. “Yeah? Love me enough to let me fuck you on a random couch?” Ryan’s dirty talk was doing its job as his words went straight to your heat. You nodded again but he grabbed your face to look you in the eyes. “Yes.” You whispered and he smiled and kissed you. “I love you too. Now will you come for me?” You nodded desperately for what felt like the hundredth time. Ryan’s pace quickened as you felt your orgasm quickly approaching. You were surprised when the band in your stomach snapped before you realised, releasing an involuntary moan loud enough for anyone outside to hear. Ryan slapped his hand over you mouth quickly but it was far too late. You didn’t even care in the moment, too enamoured in the feeling spreading through your body to be embarrassed. Ryan bit his lip and shook his head. “Can you be quiet while I come? Where do you want it?” He uncovered your mouth and you smiled, blissed out. “Come in me.” Ryan laughed and kissed you. “God why didn’t we do this before.” His hips snapped quickly, fingers digging into your sides before he stilled, spilling into you with a suppressed groan.
It wasn’t longer than a minute before Ryan was out of you and pulling his pants back up. You just lay there, catching your breath in an awed out haze. Ryan laughed and tried to help you pull your pants back up. You sat up and pulled them back on, feeling a little uncomfortable and a little turned on by the feeling of his cum slowly slipping out of you. “What are your bets the interns gonna be traumatised?” Ryan laughed at your witty commentary and used his thumb to rub the mascara stain off your cheek. “I’d love to take a picture of you like this.” He murmured. “Oh god.” You groaned when you realised everyone in that set would know you’d just been fucked upon inspection of your blotchy blush and messed up makeup. “It’s fine.” Ryan said when he understood your complaints. “You’ll never see those people again anyways.” You stared blankly at him. “Chris, Steve, Bam.” Ryan muffled his laughter with his hand, the same one that had muffled your moans earlier. “It’s not funny.” You slapped your best friend while laughing yourself before your head snapped over to see someone opening the door slowly. “They’re ready for you Ryan.” A shaky young voice sounded, too terrified to even dare look inside the room that now probably reeked of sex. You both laughed heartily, Ryan thanking the poor kid.
Hello! Could I get a Steve o x fem reader friends to lovers smut where he and the reader grew up in the same town and used to be rlly close besties. Y/N rlly liked him but didn’t know how to tell him and she kinda gave up when he left the state to pursue his jackass career. They hadn’t talked in a while but Steve came back to town and they hand out in Y/Ns bedroom, get a lil drunk, eventually confess their love for each other and have passionate sex
I know this is specific I’ve thought about this a lot 💀
For the first time, again [Steve-o x F!Reader]
gif @rhetter
Desc: Your teenage years were mostly spent hanging out with (and fancying) a rowdy American kid called Steve. That is until he moved back to the US and became a big MTV star. Once he returned to London for a while, you realised you may get to relight the spark that was once there.
A/n: Ok, ok, I know you said state but I decided to make this accurate to his life because I know an absurd amount about Steve-o. Also don’t cringe at the british slang I’m irish so it’s at least a little bit accurate. Hope you still enjoy!!! Awesome request btw
Warnings: Smut (18+), Alcohol, Smoking, p in v
4.2k words
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You always imagined losing your virginity to Steve. He was your weird neighbour that went to the posh private American school down the road. You always thought he was kind of cute but never had the balls to speak to him. That was until you stumbled home drunk from a house party one night when you were sixteen and spotted him outside his house, smoking a fag. Your drunken courage urged you to ask him for a puff. You walked up his steps wordlessly, him looking at you like you had two heads. “Can I bum some of that off you?” You pointed to his cigarette and he handed it to you silently. You took a long drag and exhaled. You introduced yourself and he replied with his name too, Steve. You nodded, “American.” He laughed at the bluntness. “That’s right.” You handed the fag back to him. “How d’ya like London?” He shrugged, “I’ve lived here three years now so, it’s cool I guess.” You chewed your lip. “I don’t want to go to bed yet and my parents are asleep so they won’t notice if I’m back late.” Steve smirked, waiting to see where you were going with this. “Do you want to go for a walk or something?” It had to be 1am at this point, but Steve smiled, “Sure.”
That night you spent hours walking around the streets where you lived, talking and laughing with your estranged neighbour. He brought his skateboard with him, such an american thing, and taught you how to ride it. You were pretty shit at it, partly because of your intoxication and partly because you just had a terrible balance. He was good, showing off some tricks, no doubt trying to impress you. You found out a lot about him. His parents were uber rich, of course, and he had lived in a bunch of different countries before he moved to the UK for secondary school. He was sixteen like you and was actually really funny. Your only impression of him was the kid who smoked outside his house late at night and skated around town. You were glad to have this night of breaking the ice even if you were kind of tipsy but the cold sobered you up and you realised you might be forming a crush on this kid. You walked home at 6am, before your parents could wake up and notice your absence. You didn’t kiss or anything though there was a bit of an awkward tension that left a lot open. Alas, you said your good nights and headed inside.
After this night, you started hanging out with Steve a lot. He always came up to your bedroom and listened to your records, him playing some stupid Mötley Crue ones you made fun of him for. He bragged about some elaborate story of how he met them, making you laugh. He was a very outgoing kid you found out and eventually you started bringing him along to the house parties you were invited to. He was a hit amongst your friends, he could chug beers like no tomorrow and would start doing ridiculous stunts and tricks to make everyone laugh. Girls were lining up asking if you guys were together but through gritted teeth you told them no. He snogged your friends as you sat and watched from the corner, unable to say a word. He started bringing you to the posh american parties, his friends attempting to flirt with you in their weird american ways. You shut them down, insisting you had a boyfriend. You felt like such a loser when he was getting with all these girls and you sat by waiting for him to come around, but he never did.
Once your friends started talking about shagging boys and losing their virginities you only had one person on your mind. Of course it was Steve, he was the perfect candidate! He was cute and you really fancied him, you were already comfortable with him. He basically lived in your room, as well as you living in his. You thought about it quite a bit, even mustered up a plan to ask him. There was a party on that weekend and you decided you were going to confess to him there that you liked him. You had been best friends for over a year at that point and almost all of your friends had had sex. You knew Steve hadn’t, he told you all about the girls he got with, even though it killed you, not that he noticed. He was pretty clueless in that department and you knew the only way he’d figure out you fancied him is if you just told him straight up. So it was decided, Saturday was the night you were to tell him.
The night rolled around and you were drinking in the kitchen, taking shots for courage and shooing off any guys that tried to talk to you. It occurred to you that you hadn’t seen Steve in a while and once you decided you were tipsy enough to let it spill you went looking for him. “Has anyone seen Steve?” You asked to every person you saw, they all shook their heads except one who mentioned they saw him go upstairs. You thanked them and headed up, opening all the doors and calling out his name. You turned the final door knob, “Ste-“. Your stomach dropped when you saw what was inside. Steve had his shirt off and was on top of your friend, Hannah, under the covers. Steve spun his head around but before you could see his expression you shouted “Sorry!” and slammed the door. Your head was reeling, the alcohol hitting you like a tonne of bricks, or else it was just the pure shock. You ran to the nearest bathroom and threw up in the toilet. You felt hot tears started to form in your eyes and knew you had to get out of there. You stormed out of the house, informing the host you just felt sick and needed to go home.
Once you got home you cried on the floor of your room, feeling so unbelievably stupid. All this time Steve showed almost no signs of interest in you, always talking about other girls who were much prettier than you. Why on earth would he want to have sex with you? You took your makeup off and crawled into bed after about an hour of sobbing when you heard taps at your window. You pulled the curtains open and looked outside. Steve was stood below, a huge grin on his face. He was throwing rocks at your window, something he often did when he wanted to come up late at night. You put on a fake smile to hide your upset and gestured that you’d be one minute. You desperately tried to cover up any signs that you had been crying in your mirror before heading downstairs to let him in.
Steve sat on your bedroom floor as you remained on your bed. He was completely radiant, talking animatedly about how he’d just lost his virginity. You apologised for walking in but he brushed you off, insisting it was fine. He was so happy, completely clueless that you were absolutely crushed, despite being a few metres away from him. “Hannah’s so hot too, god this was just the best night ever.” You faked your best smile, “I’m glad you had a good time.” Steve got up and hugged you tightly, not sensing how awkward and stiff you were being. “Sorry you had to go home, I missed you tonight.” You nodded, “Yeah, just wasn’t feeling the best.” Steve left a little while later, a practical skip in his step when heading out. You decided then and there that you were going to give up. Steve didn’t like you and that was final, you were to swallow any urges you once had and get over it.
This worked out fairly well for you, another year had passed and you and Steve were still best friends. Hannah was his girlfriend now and you both got on well. Hannah had no idea about your old crush on Steve so you never held anything against her. You still spent nights listening to records and watching stupid slashers and horror b movies. Nothing much had changed though you’d be lying if you said you didn’t still have feelings for Steve. Sometimes you’d stare at him for a prolonged amount of time, or leave accidental lasting touches. He, of course, didn’t think of these gestures as anything more than friendly but you knew your heart still felt for him. Graduation was nearing and Steve started acting a little different. When you confronted him about his awkward behaviour whenever you brought up leaving school he finally confessed. Steve told you he was going to move back to the US after he graduated and go live with his sister in Florida. Your heart sank like an anchor. “You’re leaving?!” He looked at you apologetically, great sadness in his eyes. You shook your head, “You can’t leave! What about our plans? We were supposed to get a flat and, and work in the pub!” Steve stopped your rambling and hugged you tightly. You were shocked, tears falling down your cheeks silently. You gave up and hugged him back, burying your face into his neck, letting the waterworks start. “You can’t leave.” You repeated in a whisper. He shushed you and rubbed your head, tears falling down his cheeks too. “I’ll see you again.”
* * *
Almost ten years had passed since Steve left for the States and a lot had changed. You were living in a flat nearby to where you grew up and were working in a dull office job. Meanwhile, Steve was now going by Steve-o and was a famous MTV star, making a name for himself by being a total ‘jackass’. You hadn’t been in contact with Steve for years after he stopped calling. Well you hadn’t called either so I guess it was a fault on both parts. You came across him again while channel flicking on a random Sunday. Seeing the boy who used to sit on your bedroom floor every night drinking a goldfish and throwing it back up almost sent you into cardiac arrest. However it didn’t much surprise you that Steve managed to make a career out of doing the most idiotic stuff possible. You weren’t sure if you should call him or not but figured the number would no longer be his. There was no way he was still living in Florida what with this new found fame. Instead you opted to tuning in every Sunday to see your old best friend hurt himself in dumb ways.
Less than a year later you were in your local pub, having drinks with your old friends. It was your round next and so you went up to the bar to order for everyone. “Well, well, well.” You heard a familiar american voice say behind you. You spun around quickly, and there he was in all his glory. Stephen Fucking Glover. “Steve!” You shouted, lurching forward and bringing your old friend in for a tight hug. You were beaming from ear to ear, pulling away to take him in. “Or should I say Steve-o?!” he laughed. You shook your head in disbelief, “What are you doing back in London?! When did you fly in?” He scratched the back of his head nervously. “Last night, I’m here filming for-“ “Jackass!” You cut him off, holding his shoulders and smiling brightly. “You watch it?” Steve asked, slightly shocked. You nodded enthusiastically, “I tune in every Sunday for you! You’re fucking famous now!” You bashed his arm playfully. “I always knew you’d be famous for doing something stupid.” He smiled knowingly, nodding his head. “Well I’m here with some of the guys from the show if you wanna say hi.” Your eyes widened and you grinned.
You pointed Steve out to your friends as you were lead through the pub to where his friends were and they all gasped, you gesturing them over. Steve introduced you to the star of the show, Johnny Knoxville who shook your hand and called you sweetheart. You blushed at his attempt to flatter you, (it worked) but you figured one of your friends would flirt with him for the night instead, your only interest being catching up with your long lost best friend. Next Chris Pontius flashed his familiar smile at you and Jeff Tremaine nodded and smiled politely in your direction. There were a couple of other members of the crew with them. Steve told you they’d be filming there for the next week but before he could give you more information, your friends welcomed Steve and brought him in for a big hug. He was the major event at all of your teen parties anyhow.
You spent the night sharing a table with Steve’s Jackass friends who were more than happy to house some pretty girls you brought along. You didn’t care much to speak to the guys that were on your TV every weekend and instead talked to Steve the whole time about everything he’d been up to since he left for Florida. He told you about big brother magazine and clown school and eventually how he ended up on international television flipping onto elephant shit. When it got to talking about your life since, it became a bit bleak. You had a good job and a decent flat and were still in touch with your old friends, but you felt so inconsequential compared to what Steve made of himself. “I’m just so proud of you.” You spoke from your heart, Steve blushing and thanking you. Time went by fast when you were reminiscing and catching up with an old friend and eventually the pub was closing. The rest of the gang were going to head back to the hotel they were staying at to prolong the party a little longer but the idea didn’t appeal to you. “Hey Steve, my parents are away right now and I know where they hide their spare key… how bout it? For old times sake?” Steve flashed you the smile you waited so long to see again and so you spilt from the group, despite being the glue that actually held the two together but they already seemed pretty acquainted. You waved them off and headed in the direction of your old houses on foot, you were at the pub you used to go to in your teen years after all.
The whole walk you reminisced on all the good memories, you pointing to the corner Steve taught you how to skate in the night you first spoke and him pointing out a bin you threw up in after a night out. You laughed and smiled, swearing you hadn’t grinned that wide since he left in the first place. Steve stood silently once you got to your house, placing his hand on the brick wall that split your gardens apart. Another family had moved in since Steve’s parents returned to the US and it all seemed pretty bittersweet, the nostalgia. You fished the spare key out of a plant pot and got to work unlocking the door. You let Steve in and followed after him. “God it all looks so different.” Steve touched your parent’s walls, admiring all the new pictures that decorated it, some childhood ones still remaining. He smiled sweetly before heading up the stairs. When you let him into your old bedroom he sighed, “Now this is exactly how I remember it.” You laughed and nodded. You didn’t touch any of your posters or records after Steve left, with you going to Uni and all. He sat on your bedroom floor and started flicking through your records again, well the ones you left behind. “Where’s all the Mötley Crue I left you?!” Steve couldn’t bring all of his records with him to Florida so handed you down all of his old ones, not that you particularly wanted them or anything. “They’re at my flat.” Sure you weren’t the biggest Mötley Crue fan, and Steve knew that, you just kept them because they reminded you of him. Steve turned around and gave you a knowing smile. “You know you don’t have to sit on my floor anymore, something tells me you’re too old for that now.” You gestured for Steve to sit with you on the bed before heading downstairs to rob some of your Dad’s beers. “Now it’s really the good old days!” He laughed when you handed him a can of lager.
The two of you drank beer after beer, still laughing and talking into the night. It was 3am now and you were drunker than earlier, feeling a bit risky. Steve was reminding you of all the stupid stunts he did to impress your crowd, confirming he had hardly changed since those days. Then he launched into stories of girls, saying it was funny to see your old friends at the pub seeing as he had snogged all of them. You bit back a laugh and shook your head. “What?” Steve asked, a little confused at your smirking. “No, no, it’s nothing.” Steve shook his head, moving closer to you on the bed. “What’s so funny?” You let your drunkenness take over. “You remember the night you lost your virginity to Hannah?” Steve narrowed his brows, trying to understand where you were going with this. “Well… yeah?” You downed the rest of your can anxiously. “That night, I was looking for you, that’s why I accidentally walked in.” Steve nodded but then shook his head, “I remember, but whats that got to do with anything?” You leaned in to whisper in Steve’s ear, “I was going to tell you I liked you that night.” You pulled away and plonked down on your bed, hiding your face in your hands and groaning in embarrassment. “What?!” Steve was bewildered, facing towards you and pushing you to tell him more. “I had this whole stupid plan, I was going to confess and then we’d head back to mine and take each other’s virginities or something. It’s humiliating I know.” Steve shook his head and pulled your hands away from your face, leaning over you and looking deep into you eyes. He spoke your name quietly, “If you had told me you liked me earlier, I would’ve dropped anyone for you.” Your cringe expression fell, your heart swelling and your cheeks turning scarlet. You sat up so Steve was still in front of you but so you weren’t in such an awkward position. “Are you serious?” Steve almost laughed, “I liked you the moment you asked to bum some of my cigarette. I just always thought you would never date someone like me.” You shook your head, “You got with every girl under the sun?” He smiled, “I only got with those girls to show you I was cool, the only girl I cared about was you.” You were in disbelief, shaking your head a little. “You wanted to lose your virginity to me?” He asked, his voice a low whisper. You nodded your head. “Well let’s do it.” You laughed, “Look Steve, I appreciate your romanticism but I have actually managed to have sex in the last decade.” He shook his head, a hint of a smile evident on his face. “No I mean let’s do it over, for the first time, again.” You looked at Steve so lovingly. It was beyond you that a guy like him could say something so profound and beautiful. But he was your Steve.
It didn’t take long for you to close the gap between the two of you, smashing your lips against his for the first time. Although you hadn’t done it before, and you hadn’t even seen him for almost ten years, it all felt natural. You moved together in sync, soft and slow, wanting to take it all in. You could taste the lager and cigarettes in his mouth but you didn’t care. You just needed him to touch you. You brought Steve’s hands to hold your waist, him then moving to lay you down to get on top of you. He held your face as you kissed, the tenderness causing you to whimper. You pulled away from the kiss to tear your shirt off and you pulled at Steve’s to do the same. For the first time, Steve revealed all his new idiotic tattoos you had only seen on screen. You would’ve laughed if the moment didn’t seem so important, instead brushing the pads of your fingers over the ink and continuing to kiss him. You could feel Steve’s hands move down to undo your jeans and yours moved down too to mess with his buckle. Once he zipped yours down, he helped you shimmy them off, leaving you in your underwear in front of your best friend. Steve moved up and kissed your breasts, fondling them gently. He came up to your face and kissed you some more while attempting to zip his jeans down. He pulled away to kick them off. He took his wallet out of his pocket and removed a condom. Your breath hitched, your teenage dream was coming true before your eyes, even if it was ten years late. “Can i take these off?” Steve whispered, hooking his fingers around the band of your panties and you nodded, helping kick them off as well. You crossed your legs in embarrassment for being so exposed but Steve kissed your knees, insisting it was okay and he could stop at any time. You bit your lip as Steve pulled his cock out of his boxers, removing them too. You had heard rumours that Steve had a big dick through word of mouth and… they weren’t half wrong. Steve kneeled up on your bed, slotting between your legs, putting the condom on. You reached around your back and unclasped your bra without him even having to ask. Steve sighed before even entering you, taking your image in. “You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to see you like this.” He whispers. “Me too.” You replied, unsure if that even made sense but you were too desperate for his touch to care.
Steve leaned over you and held his arm beside your head to support himself before pushing into you, slowly. You moaned at the sensation as Steve groaned, his breathing getting heavy already. After a moment of adjusting, Steve began thrusting at a steady pace. Your whimpers and whines becoming louder the faster he went. You couldn’t really believe Steve was having sex with you in your teen bedroom, a fantasy you hadn’t replayed in years. You know what they say, time makes the heart grow fonder and that rang true for you. Looking back, an awkward first time with Steve probably wouldn’t be half as enjoyable as it was now. You both knew what you were doing and the tipsiness heightened your senses. All that time apart seemed to manifest into the tenderness of the sex, like it was brewing up during those years. Your sounds were music to Steve’s ears, his heart swelling at the fact it was him making you do that. He kissed your neck softly and groaned into your ear as he came closer to the edge, your orgasm building with his. You brought Steve’s face back up and kissed him again, though it was hard now that you were moaning into his mouth. Soon enough, Steve began thrusting faster, his orgasm fast approaching as well as yours. His pants and grunts became quicker, in time with his movements, the speed causing you to grip onto his shoulders tightly. One more thrust and you were tumbling off, pleasure spreading through your whole body as you came, moaning Steve’s name as you did. You clenched around him sending Steve straight off the edge right after you. His hips stuttered and he grasped yours tightly, moaning properly as he finished.
You remained still for a moment, Steve still inside you, both of you trying to catch your breaths. Steve brushed your hair off your face and leaned in to kiss you again. “That was amazing.” He whispered, pulling away to kiss your face all over. You giggled, pushing Steve off of you. He pulled out and you both whimpered at the sensation. He dumped the condom in the bin and threw one of your old band t shirts at you along with an old pair of underwear you left behind. You muttered a thanks and put them on, Steve slipping his boxers back on to clamber into bed with you. He held you to his chest and kissed the top of your head sweetly. “So was that all you imagined it to be?” He asked, making you laugh. You turned your head and looked up at the boy you had dreamed of for years. “Better. Just a little late.” He laughed at that and planted a kiss to your temple. You drifted off in your teenage bedroom, your teenage dream holding you to his chest, all was well.
