my boyfriend made me a ehren x dave fic π
ehren was feeling a little bored after he healed and rested from the newest jackass movie so he decided to call his great friend Dave "hey Dave would you wanna come hangout at my house today" ehren says on the phone calling Dave like they are elementary school friends "uh ehren you didn't you didnt have to say it like that but yeah ill see if im busy or not" Dave says as he is sitting on the toilet using the bathroom because he is always pooping for some reason "ok bye Dave" ehren says while he does a little dance excited he could hangout "yeah talk to you later ehren" dave says calmly still on the toilet "hmm what would we though" ehren says to himself thinking because he isn't worried he knows dave will come "maybe I should call Bam he always know how to have fun" ehren says while still standing by his phone in the kitchen of his average sized house "hey Bam im trying to have fun later today do you have anything or know of something I could do" ehren says while walking around his house looking what he has to do for fun "oh fuck ehren I dont know let me think for a second" Bam says barely woken up from his hangover after heavily drinking the day before "ok I have like a trampoline and my TV but im looking for something a little more interesting" ehren says while walking outside to his backyard that isn't to big or to small but just perfect for a birthday party and his trampolineΒ Β "ehren a trampoline isn't that fun thats just stupid and childish but anyway I think i have some leftover acid steve-o gave me but never got around to using i let you have it if you want" bam says looking in his room at his drugs and bottles because thats how he has fun "hmm well if you and Steve-o do it then it must be pretty fun ill try it" ehren says kind of nervous but wanting to fit in with everyone else so not hesitant but still nervous "ok sweet come get it in like 30 minutes" bam says lightly chuckling knowing that he is just taking advantage of how innocent ehren is "ok see you then thanks Bam" ehren says while hanging up not waiting for bam to say bye back because he is so excited to have fun with dave.
ehren just sits down and watches an episode of his favorite show south park after his episode is over he gets in his 1999 toyota corolla to drive over to bams house once he gets there with no trouble he knocks on the door "BAM BAM BAM its me ehren" as he knocks on the door waiting for bam to answer standing excitedly "COME IN" bam yells from inside ehren opens the door and walks in slowly looking around "BAM HEY BAM WHERE ARE YOU" ehren yells looking around in confusion "BACK HERE" bam yells ehren looking down the hall hearing bams voice trail down it he follows the sound of bams voice walking the down the hall to a door just open a jarΒ Β with a sound coming from it. its bams room playing some kind of music that ehren heard of once it was called HIM or something like that ehren pushes the door open slightly "bam it's ehren" ehren says peeking his head in "yeah come on I got your stuff right here" bam says looking at the door waiting for ehren to fully walk in "ok do I owe you anything" ehren says as he walks in "nah its free im not gonna use it anyway but here you go should be enough for you and like 5 people" bam says handing ehren 7 what looks to be peice of paperΒ Β "uh bam one question how do I use it" ehren says while grabbing them out of bams hand "come on ehren just take them you know how you would take other things" bam says rolling his eyes at ehrens innocent dumbness "ok thanks bam bye bye" ehren says as he walks out of bams room walking away quickly because he didn't really like the music bam was playingΒ Β "yeah see you later ehren" bam shouts from his room ehren leaves bams house goes back to his house and calls dave to know when he is coming because its getting later and later its about 12:15 and he asked dave at around 10:00 "hey dave I got something pretty fun for us planned I just wanna know when you are coming over" ehren says on the phone while watching an episode of south park "ill be there in 10 minutes I wanna see what you got planned" dave says while driving to ehrens house "ok im excited to show you hurry here and drive safe see you in a bit" ehren says while getting ready to hang up on dave
"bye ehren" dave says hanging up the phone so ehren just sits on the couch very excited kicking his legs watching south park to pass the time then he hears a knock ehren jumps up to answer the door ita dave "DAVE" ehren says opening the door and giving dave a hug and dave returning the hug both of them giving eachother a tight embrace "ok no more lets go inside" ehren says the hug lasting a little longer then it should they both walk inside and dave immediately sits down on the couch being comfortable at ehrens house as he has been over there hundreds of times already "so what did you have planned for us" dave says looking at ehren ehren then reaches in his pocket and pulls out 7 pieces of paper "look i got them from bam" ehren says showing them off to dave "is this acid?" dave says looking at ehren "yeah bam told me its a good way to have fun" ehren says excitedly "how much did he charge you" dave says maming sure bam didn't scam ehren "nothing luckily" ehren says putting them on the table "ok lets take it" dave says excitedly "we should only take 1 though ive heard the effects are pretty rough" ehren grabs on tab and pull his pants and underwear down and puts the acid in his butt "ehren what the fuck" dave says in a very concerning tone "what thats what bam said to do" ehren says "what the fuck what exactly did he say" dave asks getting a little upset that bam would do that "he said take it the way we take everything else" ehren says pulling his pants up
"well thats definitely not what he meant but I guess ill do it the same way" dave says pulling his pants down "thats a little gayyyy not that there is anything wrong with that" ehren says as dave pulls his pants down and grabs the acid and sticks it up his butt aswell "now lets wait" dave says as they both sit down on the couch to watch south park they watch and entire episode then look at eachother "ahhhhh what the fuck why does your face look like its falling apart" ehren yells at dave dave starts to panic and feels his face "its not wait what fuck why is everything moving like a snake its all mixing" dave starts to yell so confused "this is so weird hey dave lets go jump on the trampoline" ehren says trying to stand up but immediately falling down on his butt on the middle of the floor "lets do it" dave says also trying to stand up and falling right on ehren they both start laughing as they hold eachother to get up and hold hands to walk to ehrens backyard to get to the trampoline but as soon as they get to the back door the stairs they can see the the stairs to step on them properly "uh how are we gonna do this" ehren says holding Dave's hand tighter leaning on him for support "we need to go slow" dave says as he starts laughing at the situation "ok ill go first" ehren says while walk towards them still holding Dave's hand and as he goes to take the first step he falls down all 3 stairs taking dave with him they fall and hit the cement "ooooowwwwww fuck" dave and ehren say almost synchronized with ehren laying his head on dave after getting up slightly "are you ok buddy" dave says rubbing ehrens head "yeah ive definitely done way worse and atleast my tooth is ok" they both stand up and hold hands once again and walk to the trampoline they both stumble to the trampoline they boost eachother up on to the trampoline and start jumping and they just lightly bounce and start jumping higher and higher "hey hey hey dave watch what I can do" ehren says as he jumps pretty high and just spins around he lands stops jumping and throws up all over the trampoline "maybe this wasnt a good idea" ehren says as he rolls off the trampoline dave stopped lightly bouncing and gets off the now throw up covered trampoline "lets go inside i need to poop" dave says grabbing ehrens hand making sure he isn't still nauseous not really caring thag ehren has his own throw up on him slowly stumbling towards the door then still nauseous not really caring thag ehren has his own throw up on him slowly stumbling towards the door then dave throws up to side that doesn't have ehren his motion sickness and the smell of ehrem finally getting to him "ahhh sick" ehren says giggling they both keep stumbling towards the door crawling uo the stairs this time making sure to not have what happened last time happen this time they walk towards the bathroom together after getting inside just leaning on eachother guiding eachother then they get to the bathroom and dave gets in and take his pants off and sits on the toilet to go poop ehren right outside the bathroom ehren takes all his clothes off and walk in the bathroom "what are you doing ehren why are you naked" dave ask confused just looking at ehrensΒ Β body ehren just walks into the shower not concerned or anything they both just sit in silence dave finishes his poop and ehren is still in the shower dave walks to ehrens room and puts his clothes on and just lays on ehrens bed waiting for him to be done in the shower turning on south park on the tv until ehren walks in towel slightly on just covering his lower body he takes the towel off and puts clothes on and gets in bed and lays right next to dave and they just cuddle until eachother falls alseep.
itβs so bad help πππ













