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potential warnings: alcohol mentioned ayyyyyy #bar lowk getting drunk ya
request: yes / no
a/n: HI EVERYBODY i am new to writing for jackass so hopefully this is cool i had this idea for a lil bit & i feel like it's kind of a flop like more of a proof of concept thing but the heart is there i hope u can tell i love them. i j wanted to get smth written lol plus i feel like i can use this preimse l8r.... hm.... anyway i would love to take requests so feel free to send them in whenever :) headcanons, scenarios, nsfw, sfw, WHATEVA!!!!
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karaoke, seven nights a week.
that was half the reason you took the job. that & you were a damn good bartender. the amount of time it took you to click play on a track was the same amount of time it took to slide a couple shots across the bar, and that was that. you had seen all there was to see. a woman in a microscopic dress doing the best metallica impression (guitar included) the world had ever seen, an eighty year old man with a cane bringing the house down with “everything’s comin’ up roses”, a heartbroken frat boy wailing out a painful “wild horses”... every day was different & it took a lot for you to be caught off guard.
you weren’t startled when the door banged open loudly enough you could’ve sworn it came off the hinges. the loud swearing had no effect. but you would be lying if you said it wasn’t something new to turn around and see them… a group of ragtag characters led by a lanky guy in a tight yellow t-shirt that said “ask me about my chevy” paired with dark sunglasses who was making a beeline right for you. he leaned right over the bar, propping his chin up with his hands as an easy smile tugged at the side of his mouth.
“hiya honey.” was all he could get out before he was physically shoved to the side by another man, smudged eyeliner accentuating eyes that could only be described as a puppy dog. “ignore him. i gotta ask y–” a hand came down on the scruff of his shirt and you watched as he tried to fight the fall. “heard you have karaoke.” came the even tone of the man who had shoved him down, sandy blonde hair falling into his eyes, beard clipped close around his jaw. you opened your mouth to reply, but were interrupted by the loudest screech known to man. out from behind the bar you ran to snatch the microphone out of the hands of a guy dressed in full tracksuit and bunny ears. “sorry… sorry…” he repeated, genuinely looking frightened. “sorry.” he said again, into the mic when you handed it back to him. “don’t put your mouth so close to it.” you laughed, and he melted in relief, nodding. his eyes were so twinkly you didn’t have the heart to tell him you had actually turned it off. as the beginning of “i wanna dance with somebody” boomed over the speakers, you heard a voice behind you. “i know something you could put your mouth close to… ow!” it was the chevy guy, and he was rubbing his cheek where the blonde one had popped him. “sorry. dunn here ‘s learning how ‘ta be gentle.” the blonde… dunn… rolled his eyes. “and pj’s learnin’ how many beers is enough. let’s say he’s still figurin’ it out.” met with laughter, you could tell all these guys were friends, so you didn’t have to tell ‘em to quit the crazy behavior… yet. besides, there was nobody else in the bar. might as well be entertained.
it was the most fun you had ever had, and that was saying a lot. everyone came over to introduce themselves and to flirt… er … “order drinks and introduce themselves”. they were charming, albeit strange. it was a level of weird you enjoyed matching. you helped weigh in on everything from which tattoo bam was getting next (you suggested a zebra right over his eyebrow), what print pontius’ next speedo should be (glittery red hearts, bedazzled of course) to whose bruise was bigger (definitely ehren’s). anytime the door swung open & someone started to walk in, they very quickly left, not able to match what was going on in there. that and you had to admit the sounds of one pj clapp doing a one-man beastie boys discography run-through was not exactly welcoming.
in the couple hours since they had come in, you truly felt you had made a connection with these guys. and little did you know, they felt that too. which is why, when your shift ended and your replacement came behind the bar, you ended up getting blocked from the door and led kindly but firmly over to their table, where the drinks were flowing and your eyes were shining like theirs. they had you doubled over in laughter, shoving each other off stools & cracking jokes til you couldn’t breathe. they kept swapping who got to sit next to “the hot bartender” & they did NOT hold back.
the next morning, you almost felt like it was a dream, as if they were figments of your imagination…. that is, until you got to work the next day & heard the door slam open, loud swearing accompanying a group of guys who immediately rushed to sit right in front of you, eager to tell you about their long day, show you their bruises, and hopefully end up buying you a couple drinks…
ohemgee yr dunn fwb fic was sososo good !!!! uhhmmm maybe some dating cky era ryan dunn headcanons?? plsplsplspls im so happy for the jackass fic revival
cky ryan headcanons
a/n: as soon as i got back home i binged every single cky movie in a singular day so im kinda in the perfect mood for this rn… thank you anon. i feel like i don’t fully have all the guys down yet so forgive me if everyone but ryan is totally OOC im workin on it 🙏
warnings: fem!reader, that’s all!!
*. ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚
- stealing his never ending supply of cky shirts!!!!!
- being his passenger princess in his “haggard ass car” (as bam would say)
- ALWAYS HAS A HAND ON YOUR THIGH WHILE HES DRIVING !!!
- pda in general constantly
- all the rest of the guys (especially bam & dico) give him soo much shit for it.
- it’s not even kissing either its just ryan constantly having his arm around your waist or shoulder.
- he’s just touchy!!!!
- i’m a firm believer ryan is a “sweetheart” “hon” and “baby” kinda guy.
- i can also see him being a “baby girl” and “doll” kinda guy (ESPECIALLY in cky era) but not in front of the guys
- unless he’s drunk, then he could care less.
- tending to his shopping cart/bike related injuries <33
- and doodling all over the cast that he has in cky 3
- (then getting pissed at him for cutting it off himself)
- bam employs you to be in little skits for the movies all the goddamn time.
- whether you like it or not you ARE forced to participate
“this is fuckin’ stupid… you don’t have to do this, sweetheart.”
“yes she does, dunn. hey, don’t listen to him, you totally do.”
- if you really, really refuse to participate bam will force you to film, but that would take a whole lot of convincing
- and either way you’re definitely the butt end of a ton of pranks. there’s really no winning here.
- ryan’s fine with the skits but draws the line when bam suggests you partake in a stunt
- he says it once in passing and gets the dirtiest fucking look from ryan
- he can’t stand the idea of you not only getting hurt, but the rest of the crew laughing at it and it forever being memorialized on a VHS tape
- overprotective bf ryan…. dreamy sigh.
- all the guys are actually shockingly fond of you.
- none of them will admit it to you though. because they’re assholes.
- (except for one time when you were able to get a “you’re actually pretty cool” out of raab when he was wasted. he denies this up and down but you know it happened.)
- they will, however, rub it in ryan’s face!!
“dunn, where’s your girl?”
“why the fuck do you wanna know, you asshole?”
“because she’s funnier than you. and easier on the eyes.”
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HI MOOT hope this isnt too much of a weird question but what r u currently working on rn :o
Definitely isn’t!! I’m working on quite a few thing rn; I’ve got a Rake x plus sized reader smut fic, a fic where all of the CKY guys take turns with the reader while recording a Radio Bam episode, a few different “would include” pieces for the CKY guys, some Raab smut drabbles, and a Bam smut drabble
Also considering doing a “Dating Ryan Dunn Would Include”! 👀
W.C: 2756
Y/N asked Johnny what being shocked feels like, he thinks it better he shows her.
Warnings: Smut, Shock Collar Usage, Dom/Sub Dynamic, Rough Sex, Unprotected sex. Pet names galore
It was pretty apparent that Johnny had a thing for electricity. He always carried a taser and had shocked himself so many times that most things had to be on maximum strength to actually get a reaction.
After seeing the guys be shocked again and again, Y/N couldn’t help but wonder what it actually felt like. She sometimes wondered if the guys were just being dramatic; surely it wasn’t actually as bad as they made it out to be.
So one day while she was visiting the set, she turned to look at Johnny, who was quietly eating his lunch opposite her. “What does it feel like?”
Johnny kept eating as he responded, “What does what feel like?”
She gestured to where he kept his taser. “Getting tased – is it really that bad?”
He paused his movement before setting his fork down onto his plate with a small thunk. “Now why the fuck do you want to know that?”
“I don’t know,” Y/N shrugged. “I just… All the guys seem to make it a big deal, but you barely flinch.”
“Yeah well, I’ve shocked myself enough that nerves are probably fried,” he reasoned. “It’s kinda hard to explain; it’s different for everyone.”
Y/N didn’t respond; instead, she looked off in thought, her eyes noticing Bam and Ryan off in the corner playing some sort of game that seemed to just be an excuse to punch each other in the dick.
Just as Johnny took a sip of his water, she turned her head back towards him. “What if you shocked me?”
Johnny coughed violently, spluttering a small drop of water across the table. He rubbed his mouth against the sleeve of his jacket. “Jesus Christ, Y/N.”
“Oh come on!” She argued back, “You tase the guys all the time; what’s the difference?"
“The difference is that I’m not in a relationship with those guys!” He hissed back while rubbing his eyes.
“Oh really? Well, you shouldn’t tell Steve O that; you’d break his heart.” Y/ N snarked back without much bite, “I’m serious; just put it on the lowest setting or something.”
Johnny made a face, showing he was actually thinking about it, so Y/N grabbed his hand. “Come on, just this one time, promise.”
A few minutes later, he had Y/N braced against a wall with his taser held in his slightly shaking hands. As much as he tried not to be, he couldn’t help being nervous; after all, this was the girl he loved.
Y/N was also a little nervous, but she had asked for it. “It’s okay, baby; I’m ready.”
He let out a small huff before turning the taser on. “Okay, here we go.”
A moment later Y/N let out a sharp breath when the taser hit her in the stomach. Since it was on the lowest setting, it wasn't that painful, but it certainly felt… strange.
Her muscles had contracted under the electric stimulation, the sensation rippling through her body. It didn’t last long since Johnny pulled the taser away almost immediately.
Suddenly she felt awkward, not because of what had happened but because after the electricity, a feeling came through her. The initial pain faded and a euphoric sensation filled her body.
She felt a certain wetness pool in her panties and realised with a furious blush that she was aroused. ‘Oh… shit.'
Unfortunately, Johnny had been with her long enough to recognise the face she was making and froze in front of her, the taser lying limply in his hand.
“Y/N…”
“No,” she interrupted him and started to move around him, “Don’t say anything, it’s weird, let’s not—"
“Well now, hold a second,” Johnny reached and grabbed her arm before she could walk away. “I didn’t say anything like that.”
Then she paused and looked at him. “Holy shit, you…”
It was Johnny’s turn to be embarrassed; still, Y/N continued but didn’t have the heart to say it properly out loud, “You’re… too?”
"Well, I don’t know!” He started to get defensive, “I mean, obviously I don’t feel this way when I tase the guy, but you…”
Johnny trailed off before he finished, and Y/N was hopeful this would be the most awkward moment of their relationship. So she stepped forward and wrapped her arm around him.
“It’s fine, baby." She gently kissed him. “Let’s just forget this ever happened, okay?”
He breathed out a long sigh before smiling at her gently. “Okay, darlin'."
———————————————————————
It had been a week since what Y/N had decided to call ‘the taser incident’, and she and Johnny had kept to their promise of never discussing it again. Or so she thought.
Johnny had come back home from set; it was the last shoot of the week, so she was looking forward to spending more time with him over his three days off from shooting.
She was sitting on the couch watching some TV, dressed in an oversized shirt and some sleep shorts, when he came in holding a small box in his hand.
“Hey baby,” Y/N greeted with a bright smile before leaning up to kiss him as he approached her.
"How are you doing, darling?” He said to her after he pulled away from her lips; he seemed nervous.
Her smile fell as she looked at him. “What’s wrong?”
Johnny just placed the box into her hands. Y/N looked at the box, then back up at him. “Johnny, what is this?”
“Just open it.” Was all he said.
Y/N did what she did whenever Johnny gave her something and slowly opened the box, fully prepared to throw it away if something tried to jump out.
Instead, when she finally removed the lid, she stared at the contents for a moment before looking back at Johnny in stunned silence.
He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Well, uh, I may have borrowed this from the set, so it’s just this one time, only if you want to.”
“PJ…” she muttered as she looked back down in the box.
There was only one thing in the box, something that Y/N instantly recognised as a collar, except it had an extra detail. On the side was a black box with two metallic prongs poking out the side.
Johnny had brought home a shock collar.
“This was a bad idea, wasn’t it?” He asked as she pulled the collar out of the box. “We can just forget about it; I just thought…”
A raised hand silenced him. “Now hold on, I never said it was a bad idea.”
His face slowly shifted from unsure to a small smirk. “Really?”
"Honestly", she took a breath before answering, “I’m surprised that you actually want this too.”
Now the smirk was fully realised as Johnny leaned down over her. “Too?”
Y/N swats at him. “Shut up…Just put it on me.”
A moment later the distinct click of the collar’s latch echoed through the room. Y/N moved her neck slightly, checking how the collar felt.
“You okay?” Johnny asked her gently, his hand rubbing the collar slightly.
She nodded. “Yeah, it’s not too tight.”
His hand withdrew from her neck to cup her face so she would look at him. “Safe word?”
“Oklahoma.”
He smiled widely. “Good girl.”
Next thing she knew, Johnny’s lips crashed into hers with the same passionate energy he always gave. She responded eagerly, humming against his lips as her hands moved up to his hair.
At the same time his hands had moved to the small of her back so he could pull her up off the couch. Nibbling gently at the bottom of her lip, he smiled as she gasped before deepening the kiss further by sliding his tongue in.
They moved as one, somehow managing to climb the stairs without pausing their heated make-out before slamming the bedroom door open.
Johnny pulled away from her, his pupils blown wide. “Knees.”
Y/N didn’t move; she wanted to test the waters, see if he was serious about what he had planned.
His hand reached into his pocket and pulled out a small black remote. The sensation was immediate; the muscles in her face twitched slightly as the electricity zapped her through the collar. She loved it.
She dropped to her knees as the shocks subsided. Johnny used his free hand to grip her face and lift it up to face him. “That’s better.”
When he pulled his hand away, Y/N watched through hooded eyes as he unbuckled his belt one-handed. Moments later his jeans dropped to the ground, followed shortly by his briefs.
“You know what to do, darlin'," he said expectantly as his cock hung in the air.
She took a moment to admire him, which was the wrong move when another sharp shock spread through her body. The hand returned this time, wrapping into her hair and pulling her forward.
"You're really testing me today.” His voice was sharp as he hissed with clenched teeth.
Obediently, Y/N spread her lips apart and started to gently lick down his shaft before taking him into her mouth. The groans from Johnny encouraged her to go further, taking more of his length.
Johnny’s hand tightened and started to move gently, guiding her back and mouth onto his cock. “Fuck, you are so good, baby,” he groaned as his pace quickened.
Of course, Y/N couldn’t verbally respond to the praise, but she managed to hum happily against his length, sending vibrations that caused his head to fly back.
“Shit, you have to stop,” he gritted out, “otherwise this is going to be very short-lived.”
Y/N slowly slid off him, making sure to tighten her lips near the tip to create a little pop.
They moved again, Johnny lifting her into his arms so he could drag her over to the bed, bending her over the end so her ass stuck up. Y/N wiggled her butt at him with a laugh.
Another shock rippled through her body. “What was that for?”
"Being a fucking tease.” Was all he said before yanking her shorts down and slapping her on the ass.
Y/N gasped as the air hit the currently drenched pussy. After this long with Johnny, her body moved like second nature, already moving her legs apart to present.
A moment later, Y/N shuddered as a rough hand slowly rubbed against her thigh before finding its way to her mound, cupping it as he carefully dipped a finger in.
She tried to rub against it but just earned another shock; this time her body shuddered for almost five seconds. Johnny leaned in close.
"Are you doing okay?” When she gave a nod as confirmation, he smirked. “Good, because with the way you’re acting, I think you’ll be getting more shocks tonight.”
“Promise?” She asked with a pleased hum, which transformed into a whine as she was shocked once more.
Her body jerked as he slapped her on the ass once more before withdrawing his hand from her entrance. “Watch it.”
Laying her cheek flat against the bed she whines,bed, “I’m sorry… I'll be a good girl.”
She moaned as his hand returned, pushing her finger in as his thumb began to circle her cunt. Johnny didn’t speak; instead, he concentrated on his rhythm, pushing in and out of her at a steady pace.
Y/N knew she wasn’t allowed to move during this moment, but that didn’t stop her body from trembling under his ministrations. With a moan, she turned her head and buried her head into the duvet, muffling the sounds.
Electricity flooded her body as Johnny pushed harder into her. “No, darlin', I gotta hear you.”
“Baby…” she moaned out, struggling to lift her head. “I’m going to… I’m going to"
“Go ahead, darlin', cum all over my hand.” Johnny leant over her, his mouth closer enough that she felt his breath against her ear.
The coil inside her snapped. A second later, Y/N’s back arched as she collapsed against the bed. Her ears buzzed as she heard Johnny guiding her through her orgasm.
“There you go, darlin'," he moaned into her ear as he thrust his fingers inside her a few more times before pulling out.
He tapped her butt, ushering her to move further on to the bed, but she didn’t move. She was trying to catch her breath when Johnny placed his hand in front of her, showing how he was holding the remote.
Watching through hooded eyes, Y/N saw as he pressed the little button before clenching her eyes shut as the electricity moved through her body. Rather than in pain, she felt more energised, allowing her to shuffle forward and turn so her back was lying flat on the bed.
“Take off the shirt," Johnny said as he peeled off his own graphic tee.
The hem almost tore with how aggressively she ripped the oversized shirt over her head, leaving her completely exposed to his dark gaze. As soon as she threw fabric away, Johnny was on her, kissing her deeply.
Y/N’s head was pushed down into the pillow as he engulfed her, letting out small noises whenever he bit down on her lips in between kisses.
Breaking from the kiss, Johnny gently stroked her now swollen lips with his thumb; with his other hand, she felt him rubbing his head against her entrance.
“You ready for me, baby?” He asked her, looking into her eyes for reassurance.
She pulled him for another kiss before pulling away. "Please, PJ…”
Slowly he slid in, making sure she was comfortable. Y/N let out a long groan with each push. Once he was fully settled, he pulled his hand away from her face, reaching to the side of the bed.
White spots appeared in her vision as the current flowed from the collar; in that same moment, Johnny began to thrust. His hips pushed forward like second nature, so familiar with her body that he knew exactly where to hit every time.
Tears pooled in her eyes as the pleasure overwhelmed her; she was still coming down from her last orgasm, but another was quickly building. Johnny smirked proudly, looking down at her like she was his art.
"Y/N, you look so fucking beautiful like this,” he groaned out. “Show me how much you want this.”
Finally, she’d been given permission to respond back, something she instantly took advantage of. Lifting her hip from the bed, she tried to match his pace.
“That’s it, you’re doing so good." She preened under his encouragement, moving to wrap her hands back in his hair.
Johnny’s thrusts went more erratic as he teetered on the edge of his climax; he tried to hold on, but she felt so good.
Y/N was also close; she could feel how the cord inside her was wound tightly, ready to spring. So, she pulled him closer and whispered, “One more time.”
Immediately he understood what she meant and looked at her deeply. “You sure, baby?”
“I’m sure.” A moment later, Y/N hit her climax as the collar shocked her one final time, almost screaming as she hit her peak.
Above her, Johnny’s thrusts stuttered as her walls clamped down on his cock. “Fuck!”
As he rode out his own climax, Y/N let out a pleased hum as she felt his cum flood inside her. He collapsed once he finally came down from the high.
For a moment the room was silent, filled only with the breathing of the two, and they clung to each other, sweaty, spent and satisfied.
It didn’t last forever, and soon Johnny rolled to one side before standing. Y/N hissed slightly as his hand curled around her neck and undid the collar’s latch.
There wasn’t any pain, but it felt strange to lose the weight of it.
“Let’s get you cleaned up,” she heard him say as he disappeared into the bathroom, returning with a wet cloth a minute later.
Y/N spread her shaky legs to allow him to gently wipe at her sensitive area, wiping away the stickiness. Once he was done, he joined her back on the bed, manoeuvring the both of them until they were under the covers.
“Johnny…” she tried to say but was shushed. "Johnny, it’s only three in the afternoon.”
He just pulled her closer. “Shush, let’s just nap.”
Despite her protests, she melted into his touch, quietly enjoying his presence and breathing in his scent. The comfortable silence was broken when she spoke up. “Do you really have to give it back?”
Her body started shaking as Johnny laughed against her.
