#irenerk

it’s a little bittersweet, meeting new people when she’d grown attached to the group she’d been in last week. she wishes to redeem herself as the team leader, but the rules don’t allow it, and she isn’t sure whether she’s disappointed that she can’t, or relieved that she doesn’t have to worry about whether or not she’ll be ale to actually do it. at the very least, she’s happy that minho is still in the same group with her, allowing for some sort of anchor in this fast-paced, ever-changing journey.

still, despite her initial apprehensions about it, she once again finds herself becoming comfortable with this new group, especially after they all decide to do a band concept for part of their performance, an idea first brought forth by daniel, and one she thinks is so brilliant she’s just as enthusiastic about it as he is. perhaps that had been their downfall last time; they’d stuck too close to a classic, hadn’t taken enough risks. and this is a big one that she hopes will pay off.

throughout the week, she learns about each and every person, once again picking up on their traits and skills, their different personalities that didn’t clash, but rather worked together in productive discussions and constructive criticisms because they all had one goal: to put out their best. it shows in the way they help each other, in the way every person makes sure that everyone else is doing well, that everyone else is getting the help they need.

it shows in the way yongsun takes the reigns of as the leader extremely well, making sure every single detail is taken care of, reigning them in if they ever got off topic, checking in on everyone if she senses them struggling. she witnesses it first hand when yongsun approaches her to practice their lines together, in her soft yet strict approach at helping the others. "you remind me of my vocal coach back home in sydney,” she tells her as they take a break from rehearsing. “i always viewed her as an older sister. you’ve got that same warm kind of feeling.”

it shows in rose’s determination to familiarize herself with the electric guitar and playing in a band, both foreign concepts to her. her willingness to learn makes it easy for seola to teach her and guide her, and, despite her initial insecurities, rose shows a great deal of courage to be willing to play in a band for the first time at the mgas, whose audience was much larger than anything seola had ever played for, and she admires her for it. even when they’re working on the choreography for the transition from instruments to choreography, seola learns of just how talented her fellow teammate is.

it shows in the way daniel so openly admits his own weakness in dancing so that he can get help with it. as someone who has always had a problem with admitting her own faults, she respects his candor when it’s her turn to help him through the choreography, carefully explaining each step, making sure that he’s not only got the choreography donw, but also that he’s aware of his spacing when in formation, aware of how his lines look as he performs. "you know,” she tells him as she helps adjust the position of his arms and waist during a particular move, watching their reflection in the mirror. “you say you’re bad at this, but with some practice, i bet you’d be pretty decent.”

and it shows in the way minho holds her up when she reaches her lowest point mid-week and she goes to him with all her thoughts, dumping each and every insecurity and sense of guilt on him, so much so that she feels bad afterward for having done so. but he shows great maturity and empathy when he tells her he understands what she’s going through, but that she shouldn't be too hard on herself, that all they can do for now is do their best. “i need you to be amazing again, so i can be too,” he tells her, and she feels the tears welling up in her eyes again. when did she become such a crybaby? “otherwise i’d be too worried and tripping on my own feet and we can’t have that okay?” he then wraps her in an embrace and she feels as if a dark cloud is being lifted. she hugs him back, chucking at his words even as she continues to cry and let it all out. “see, you would have been a great leader. i knew i voted for you for a reason,” she jokes quietly, referring to when they’d all voted on who would be the leader for the week. and as much as she’d like to sit around to recover, he’s absolutely right; it’s time to get back to work.

the work load is large, with having to not only learn new choreography, learn a new song, but also having to arrange a band version of the first minute and a half, all within a week. but with the group working like a well-oiled machine, things seem to be running as smoothly as she could have dreamed. the choreography is cleaned up, the band is playing like a cohesive unit, their name is picked, and their stage outfits chosen.

before she knows it, the day of filming arrives and her nerves are once again on high alert. she doesn’t think they can get any worse, but a cog in the machine comes lose and the gears come to a grinding halt once they run through rehearsals and daniel makes a mistake with the choreography. tensions are unbelievably high as they leave the stage afterward, so much so that she feels she can’t breathe. she can only imagine how daniel must feel after making such an error on stage, and she doesn’t want him to feel that way, so she approaches him from behind, walking in step beside him as she wraps an arm around his, hoping it’s comforting, even if just a tiny bit.

“hey, you okay?” she asks him, concern clearly written in her tone. she glances at him, soft smile on her features. “it’s okay, you know. we all make mistakes.” she bites on her lower lips, trying to find the right words to say, deciding to take it to a lighter tone. “i know it doesn’t seem like it, but even i make mistakes. shocking, right?” she laughs quietly to herself, lips pursed into a close-lipped smile. “mistakes don’t matter. what matters is how you recover from them and learn. we’ll go through it again, yeah?”

in the end they all run through their performance again, making sure they’re back on track just before filming.

last week, her team had been the fifth to perform, and it had put her extremely on edge while watching everyone else’s performances. now, with them going dead last, she isn’t sure she’ll make it to the end. her fingers are tingling and her mind and heart are going a million miles a minute. she finds that watching the performances of the other teams helps, but it also puts more doubt in her mind. everyone on the show is so talented---where does she stand?

by some act of god, she makes it to the end, and their team name is called. she trails behind most everyone, standing just in front of yongsun as they make their way to the stage. “hello, we are girl crush!” they introduce themselves, bowing at the audience and at the judges, each of them dressed to the nines and looking sharp as all hell in their suits.

afterward, they make their way to their starting positions, instruments at the ready, and she takes one last deep breath.

remember to have fun, she tells herself. you got this.

she starts off the song on her electric guitar, fingers gliding across the strings like she’s been playing it her entire life, and she has. she owes all of her guitar knowledge to her father, and this is in part an ode to him, to show him that all the time he’s spent with her is paying off, that she’s doing what she loves and is using what she’s learned from him well. she leans in toward the mic as her voice and rose’s joins in with the melody. daniel and yongsun then take over before the song fully takes off, the rest of the instruments joining in to make the song have a fuller sound.

난 널 그리워하고 i’m missing you 너는 날 기다리게 해 and you make me wait for you

she looks directly into the camera as she sings her first line, voice soft but clear as she tries to emote the feeling of having loved and lost, drawing from her most recent experience at her mother leaving her family behind. it’s painful to admit that, even after all the wrong she’s done, seola still misses her, even if it’s just a line in a song.

after her short adlib, she no longer has any lines until just before they switch to choreography, so she focuses instead on her fingering, making sure she’s in time with the rhythm minho keeps on the drums, still aware of her facial expressions, painting a melancholy expression on her features with her lips turned down at the corners in the most minute of manners, her brows ever so slightly furrowed.

say woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo woo

she sings her lines with longing, eyes closed as she brings her lips closer to the microphone, still strumming along to their arrangement. the most difficult part of their performance, in her opinion, is coming up soon, and soon as rose finishes her line and the lights dim, she quickly removes the guitar from around her shoulders and carefully places it down on its stand. she then rushes to join her fellow teammates in formation, making it just in time before the lights come back on, with minho at the front of their straight line. it had run flawlessly, despite the small hiccup they had during rehearsals.

from behind, they do the arm choreography while minho raps, and then break off toward the sides into full choreography. as much fun as she’d had doing the band section, seola enjoys this the most. she considers dancing to be just another extension to her singing, another way to express the emotions and nuances of a song when her voice isn’t in use. her movements are sharp as a knife where they need to be, smooth as running water at other times. she’s a trained dancer through and through, and it shows in her precision and musicality. compared to last week, this type of choreography is more her style.

밝은 곳을 걸으며 빛을 남겨줘 let me walk to the bright place, leave the light on

when she sings again, there’s hardly a sign at all that she’d been exerting herself, her voice still loud and clear, barely a waver to be found. she falls to one knee at the end of her line, continuing on with the choreography. allowing the rhythm to dictate the flow of her movements, in time with the pace of the song as well as her other teammates. 

the mirroring part of the choreography comes up and she positions herself in front of their formation, turning around to face minho, making sure their movements are perfectly in sync as they look at one another. 

네가 보여 i can see you

she whips her body around again at the end of her line, and they once again disperse across the stage into a new formation after minho raps his line. she repeats her wooing line again, walking across stage with purpose as she once again finds the camera, looking straight into it. she then launches into the following line, yongsun joining in as they sing the section they’d first gone over together during practice.

잠시라도 사라지면 안 돼 deja vu deja vu don’t disappear even for a moment, deja vu deja vu

with all her lines sung, she puts all her effort into the last few counts of choreography, face still just as expressive as it had been when she’d started the song. their performance comes to an end to the sound of yongsun and daniel’s voices, and they all form into a circle, each of their backs turned toward the middle as they sit on the floor.

they’re quietly shooed off stage, and she’s one of the last to leave, wanting to savor the moment for just a bit longer, of their hard work paying off. even if she’s in the bottom again this week, at least she can say she’s proud, not only of herself, but of the rest of her group.

“congratulations on a great performance guys,” she says once they’re back stage and their mics have been removed. she’s all smiles and giddy as she grabs onto the shoulders of minho with her two hands on either side of his head, using his height as leverage to get more air as she jumps up and down. “you all did amazing.”

of course that was easier said than done. his gloominess over the eliminations and even all things netizens say about him, just kind of weighed down on him all week. sure, he tried to be positive. but it’s still hard for him. his new team is nice. but this is his first time meeting them all. hyuna, jei, daniel, guanlin and rose. they are all so nice to him, but he still hesitated. he didn’t know why he hesitated. maybe it was because he didn’t want to drag the team down. but it’s so easy to fall into this team. he loves his old teams, he cries for everyone eliminated and he cheers on everyone. but can he even cheer himself on when it’s needed? 

as they’re talking, sungyeol just quietly watching and listening. they were talking team names, and of course, captain summerica gets suggested and he can’t help but laugh. the image of captain america as a surfer entered his mind and he just kept laughing while raising a thumbs up to second the idea. “i love it,” he said. that was probably his first smile of the week. sungyeol didn’t realize it then, but it would be one of many. of course, it got shot down by the girls. he then pondered what it could be. he voices his suggestion. “vista. we could be team vista. it meant pleasant view and we are fairly attractive team,” he said, clarifying his reasoning. of course, he’s expecting it to get shot down, but everyone seems to like it. first victory of the week? awesome. things are going good. so far so good. their leader is chosen as daniel since everyone else have already done the leadership thing, and sungyeol offers him a thumbs up. good on dnaiel for stepping up, he thinks, since guanlin seemed so desperate to not be leader. he found his team fairly interesting. they were a mishmash of personalities but somehow it was all working. they then decided on the song, sungyeol of course trying to get his suggestions with sistar’s touch my body and chichi’s party since he was a fan of both groups, but the song once again was decided according to their strengths. kard’s hola hola was complimentary and after listening to it, sungyeol found himself in agreement. 

practice was uneventful. they did their lines, their choreo parts. rose and jei had taken on teaching the choreo on a more one on one basis and sungyeol was thankful, because he didn’t have much skill with dancing. maybe this week would be easy. 

a day or two later, sungyeol lost count, they had decided to do the splits as a sort of bonding activity. normal teams would play games and stuff to bond…but the splits? well that is something. rose went down in a full split, and sungyeol clapped with a laugh. it was no surprise that the dancers would be really good at the splits. hyuna was allowed to stay out of it and sungyeol watched as guanlin and daniel tried, with a….varying level of success. it was almost ridiculous. however when it was his turn, he dropped into a full split with ease. he wasn’t a dancer but he practiced a lot at home and since he was tall, manner legs were a thing. he rubbed the back of his neck with a grin. “the splits help me concentrate when I’m drawing. ” he said, with a grin. Finally when jei drops into a full split, he claps for her success. he’s not shocked.  

wednesday and the camera relay bring up some unwanted thoughts in his head. he’s reminded of his family and how his grandfather turned him away completely, telling him he couldn’t save his wife, telling him that he was trash and then taking his daughter because the future heir wasn’t allowed to be around trash. the conversation with daniel helps a bit but regardless, sungyeol spends the day in a daze. he’s the first to leave because he can’t handle it anymore. he ends up crying at home. hes back in thursday but it seems that his mood isn’t as bad. he goes through practice, singing and dancing and in the middle of the day, during lunch, he sings the shark song happily hoping to entertain.

d-day comes. sungyeol felt ready and he’s hopeful that it will ultimately go well. he hopes that he can execute the part well that he’s switched with daniel. heseager to see himself stand at the end of all this victorious. sungyeol wants royal so much. he takes a deep breath to calm his thoughts and his heart. he needs to be calm. team b finishes their performance, and it was finally their turn. third to perform. he’s eager to show that he belongs here. he has to prove that chasing his dreams is important. that he’s not a one trick pony. that he’s not filler. that he’s not trash. they take their spots on the stage and introduce themselves brightly. “hola hola, we’re team vista!” it’s a cute introduction and they had come up with the idea that their individual intros would have something to do with the time of day, since vista meant a pleasant view in any time of day. when it was his turn, he playfully winked. “like a cool evening breeze, my voice will cool you down. i’m #4030, lee sungyeol!”

sungyeol is the one who opens the song, so once they take their spots and the music starts, he’s counting himself in his head and right on cue, starts singing. his voice is a husky rockers voice but he manages to still stay bright and summery as he sings.

gibun joge naerijjoeneun haessal maju bomyeonseo utgo inneun geudaewa na neomu joa ireoke maeil ireokeman haengbokhameul gyesok angyeojullae kkaego shipji aneun kkumman gata

he tries to supress a giggle at the jeina fanservice because it’s super cute. over the course of the week, hes found his perspective of hyuna shattered. at first he had thought her as this perfect trainee and it came to that she wasn’t. she was super nice. they had talked a bit and sungyeol was happy to essentially considerher a friend to him. he watched everyone dance and perform. they decided that they would be split up into pairs for a part of the song and sungyeol was with jei. the choreographywas simple and after the chorus, he watched jei sing.

this was where the pairs came in when the lines split off. they danced together and their thing was that he was like a romantic partner. he does a casual body roll, working it into the steps with a cheeky grin.

daraolla olla All night long

the next quirk in their choreography comes with rose’s rap part. sungyeol watches as she drops into the full splits all while rapping and hes grinning widely feeling really happy. then comes guanlin with his rap part. it was a group decision to give the kid the harder part so that he could shine and show off his skills and prove to the netizens that he belonged up there. sungyeol was really proud of the kid. he had come a long way this week and he managed to shine. they split off for lines again. it was easy.

daraolla olla All night long

naraolla olla jeo wiro

then came the part that daniel and sungyeol switched and he hoped that he could nail the higher register. his hopes came in good and he nailed that high note with his husky voice.

ireoke yeongweoni utge haejweoyo Hola Hola Hola Hola

they finished off the song and took their final poses. it was a good ending. as they came off the stage they said their genius outro. “hasta la vista, baby!” he grinned. it meant see you soon and hopefully this wouldn’t be a final goodbye for them.

THIS WEEK turns out to be a blessing in disguise.  that’s what jei thinks of it at least, when she sees hyuna’s number matched with hers - regardless of the way they’re fighting right now, regardless of the anger in her heart, the other girl is still her best friend.  eventually, the seeds of wrath will disappear and they’ll be left stronger than before - and maybe this week will really be the catalyst for that.  that’s what jei is hoping for, because she’s getting really tired of disappointments when it comes to this show.

the first time they all meet up isn’t so bad.  she doesn’t have a preconceived notion of frustration at the formation of the group, but rather at the mgas as a whole, so there’s less judgment.  it makes for easier settling in, really - especially when daniel tells her that sungwoon has told him a lot of good things about her.  she hadn’t known they knew each other enough or were even friends, but she also very bluntly replied that sungwoon probably just thinks she’s a good leader more than anything else.  he seems to think otherwise, for some unknown reason to her, but jei lets it go instead to allow for more group work.

group work like picking out the name for their team, and their song, and deciding on choreography - and teaching choreography.  personally, jei knows that this challenge is going to be the most difficult one for her yet.  smiling naturally hasn’t been something that comes easy to her for a long time but, this time she’s determined to improve.  maybe with a smile, jei will turn around the opinions against her, who knows.  she doesn’t want to be in the bottom rung, hanging on just because of opinions rather than the talent - or lack thereof - that should be the reason for elimination.  but regardless of that, they still need to pick something that fits the summer theme before jei even considers practicing her expression.

daniel, as much as jei rolls her eyes, turns out to have sungwoon’s humour - his idea for their team name is captain summerica, simply because it’s somehow been revealed that all of them could speak fluent english after realizing, or in some cases remembering, that guanlin’s korean was fairly basic.  but when she and rose tell him absolutely not, all he does is pout and mumble something about the no -fun noonas which of course will probably turn into a running gag for the rest of the week if jei’s luck has anything to do with it.

which it does, but that’s another story for later.

eventually sungyeol suggests vista as a team name, which everyone seems to like - especially since the meaning of it correlates to their visuals, and to their charisma.  though there were a lot of song options to sift through, they eventually settled on kard’s hola hola because it suited both the group dynamic as well as their skillset.  not to mention, it was just a fun song with a nice vibe in general.  as daniel and guanlin are the only members of their team who hadn’t been leaders before, and guanlin was clearly begging with his eyes not to be, daniel stepped up to the plate and most of the easier parts of the week were set.

it also makes it easier that there’s another person well versed in dancing on their team amongst the ones who .. try their best.  they decide that rose and jei will each take two members under their wing and teach them under a more one on one basis, to make sure that the dancing is on point before coming back together and pulling it off to dance as a team.  

maybe this week, she thinks, is finally a blessing after all.

jei gets a little nervous, though, A DAY OR TWO LATER when they decide to try doing splits as a group activity.  not that she has a problem doing them; she’s actually quite flexible - it’s just that if people don’t know what they’re doing, they could really pull a muscle or worse.  which, all in all, would really put a damper on their performance overall on friday - but she doesn’t say anything about it, just presses her lips into a thin line and watches everyone begin to stretch.

this is a really bad idea, but jei still stretches with them.  after all, she’s part of this team, regardless of whether or not they have silly notions of team spirit.  why couldn’t they just play games or something like team dynamiq did? jei sighs quietly to herself, watching rose perfectly fall into her split - which wasn’t unexpected, considering flexibility seems to be what she’s best at given past performances.  she hears her explaining it as something that she’s learned to do with her past ballet experience, which makes sense.  

the others, of course, have varying levels of success.  hyuna can’t even try considering her cast, but watching daniel and guanlin attempt is almost humorous.  she probably would have laughed, if jei was the type to laugh often.  the only time in recent memory is when sungwoon was around, but that was because she was laughing at his stupid comedy, mostly.  more than likely.  that’s a thought she hasn’t allowed herself to think, and instead she turns her eyes to the remaining member of her group besides herself.  sungyeol manages to surprise her - apparently he, too, can do a full split without much of a hassle.  it’s interesting, to learn new things about her teammates, though jei doesn’t speak it aloud.

instead, she too just does a split and rolls her eyes when the others start to clap.  but jei finds that fitting in - kind of - is really just as easy as that.

so it turns out that THE PAST WEEK is a lot better than previous ones, even if only by a small margin.  she still cares about all her previous teams, still loves them in their own ways but this one gave her hyuna, and that’s more than she could ask for from it.  maybe that’s what made this week so easy - because hyuna was there, even if in the beginning things were a little awkward between the two.  at least they managed to make up, at least their feelings were laid on the table and they became better for it.  it honestly took a lot of stress off her shoulders.

beyond that, even if there was that strange moment practicing her expressions in the mirror that she still to this day doesn’t understand what really happened - for the most part, everything seems to have gone well.  as for the rest of the group, together, they had a lot of .. fun, strangely enough, even if she’s still sure that daniel is a bit terrified of her no matter how close lipped he is about it.  it’s just the look in his eyes or how he snaps to attention whenever she speaks.  but between dancing just because they could, or doing the in my feelings challenge together, or even practicing their splits, they’ve all managed to get a little closer.  it’s all coming to a close though, now that friday has rolled around and they’re all grouped together for their performance.

they’re going to be third this time, so jei thinks she has a moment to breathe before she’s thrown onstage with the others to give her best shot at a pony show.

for now though, her mind wanders, zones out when the first group goes onstage.  as the time passes, jei barely even recognizes the second one getting up to prepare.  then they take the stage as well - somehow, she’s forgotten how quickly time moves, and how quickly this show really moves.  before she knows it, they’re getting up to prepare and stand backstage as a group, and everything that has led up to this moment is about to shine in bright lights and song.

when the second group shuffles off the stage, she hears a familiar voice saying good luck unnies, and jei turns her head to see doyeon smiling at them.  her hand reaches out and brushes along the skin of her arm as she passes as a thank you, and then it’s their turn to shine.

“ hola hola, we’re team vista!” jei smiles with the rest of her group and waves both of her hands towards the audience.  all that she can think of in this moment after practicing her smiles without mirrors is that it’s best to think of things that make her happy.  like hyun does, or when wrinkles hops into her lap.  or like making friends with sungwoon, and making up with hyuna this week.  it’s easier to smile a little more naturally when she thinks of things like this.  by the time it’s her turn for her personal introduction, jei’s ready.  “ i’m the twinkle in the twilight that makes you look twice, #4011 kim jinhee!”

by the time they take their positions for the choreography, jei is ready with happy thoughts to run through her head.  her body knows the movement after practicing the song so many times throughout the week, and considering she has less lines than weeks before if only because this song is built for four people rather than six, it’s still easier to allow more happy thoughts to fill her head.

they’ve decided the grouping to be hyuna with guanlin, rose with daniel, and finally, jei with sungyeol.  the choreography is kept much the same as the song after everyone decided it fit both their ability as a team and the song really well, and they didn’t want to change it too much - ... besides a few added quirks that both the audience and the judges would hopefully enjoy.

besides the fact that daniel and sungyeol had decided to switch their parts towards the end of the song in the middle of the week, so far things seem to be going well and hopefully nothing goes wrong by the end of it.  but the first quirk of their choreography comes towards the beginning - when hyuna begins her part.  they edited the dance just a little, for hyuna and jei to meet towards the center of the stage at the beginning of her part just for a little fanservice as hyuna begins her rap with, can i get your attention baby girl.  they’re close, and jei’s smiling as she brushes her fingers down hyuna’s cheek with a little bit of amusement dancing in her eyes.  they’re best friends, and it’s been shown throughout the week that this is the case - but jei knows enough about the idol world to realize that fanservice makes up a lot of it.

even though the part was short and they go back to the original choreography afterwards, it was still fun while it lasted.  her first singing part doesn’t come until towards the second half of the chorus, and by then, jei is ready with her happy thoughts and her smile.

i wish time would stop like this i keep thinking can you feel me burning up

and this is the point where the pairs come in.  between the choreography, and the splitting of the lines, it’s clear that they’re meant to be paired off.  the only difference here is, hyuna and guanlin do something a little more family based; guanlin as a little brother and hyuna as a big sister simulating having fun somewhere together.  jei’s a different story though, since sungyeol is meant to be something like a romantic partner.  she can feel him behind her as her body snaps and she sings their next line together.

it’s getting hot all night long

the next quirk in their choreography doesn’t come until rose’s part, where instead of the half split shown in the original, she goes down into a full split all while rapping.  it’s surely meant to bring the attention on her, and jei really hopes that it does.  after all, rose is beautiful.  she deserves a little bit of spotlight besides the negative energy she got from revealing whose daughter she was.

everything seems to be going smoothly, especially after guanlin shone in his lines.  they decided to give him a more difficult part in general just to disprove the netizens claims that he doesn’t really deserve to be here, and that he’s just skating by on the success of his team.  becauseof it, jei’s heart is swelling just a little.  maybe it’s an effect of the song and the performance on her, or maybe she’s just really happy in general basking in the lights.  regardless, she’s back to her part in the chorus again with a half smirk, half smile on her lips.

i wish time would stop like this i keep thinking can you feel me burning up

to be fair, her lines aren’t all that diverse but again - they had stronger rappers than singers this round, and it was only right to be able to highlight them.  she still does well with what she’s given, especially towards her part in the end which she pronounces with perfect english.

the night is right throw your l’up to the sky

then comes the switching of the parts that sungyeol and daniel did - mostly because of the higher register, but it seems to come off well.  by the time hyuna and guanlin finish the song together and they’re in their finishing pose, jei is still smiling.  when it’s time for them to say goodbye to the stage, she rushes over to hyuna and throws an arm around her shoulders, waving with her other arm.

it’s regretful to leave behind his teammates and the bond they fostered during the week-- this one, the strongest for daniel since girl crush during the 2018 releases week. he already misses them the second the mnet staff calls him to make his song selection for the week.

as if the pressure of selecting his own song, and by extension, teammates, isn’t enough, as leader of the first place team, he’s the first one to make the selection. there are no closed spots to guide him in his pick, no lessened numbers for him to guess at those who came before him, and where they might be placed.

                             SINGING                      DANCING               RAPPING                          Amazing Kiss (4)           Instruction (6)          Born Hater (3)                        Love In The Ice (6)           Handclap (6)            Who You (3)                                                                    Stay (7)

“ah, what should i do,” he laments aloud, holding his head in his hands. there’s a moment where he actually considers going for rap this week, but when he looks at the numbers beside the rap songs, and thinks of the amount of rappers in the competition, he couldn’t take a spot from them in good conscience. now, this far in the competition, probably isn’t the time to venture out and try something new, either. realistically, that leaves singing, and only two selections for him.

truthfully, he doesn’t know either of the songs, but mina listens to tvxq, and as far as he’s heard, they’re a really impressive vocal group. daniel, on the other hand? pretty far from impressive. the knowledge of that doesn’t make it any easier for him to toss himself into a vocal category. people like sungwoon are the ones that deserve a singing group. daniel fits more in a group of charming-but-minimal-talent. somehow, knowing these songs are likely ballads, where he’ll be judged solely on vocal ability makes his burden worse this round than any other. 

instead of choosing for himself, daniel thinks of people he hopes to sing with, namely, sungwoon and jinsoul, and tries to imagine what song they would choose to give them higher odds of reuniting. should he go to love in the ice, with more slots and more chances for him to run into friends, or go where his heart is leading him-- amazing kiss?

in the end, daniel wouldn’t be himself if he didn’t follow his heart, and he’s a little intimidated by love in the ice, anyway. “i’ll go with amazing kiss,” he decides with a nod.

  ⊰  ———– PRACTICE  ⊱

daniel wouldn’t say he’s disappointed when he sees his team, they just don’t meet his high hopes. the only familiar face is yongsun, though he has watched junmyeon and luda throughout the competition, and is pleased to meet them. he can’t help but feel dejected at missing out on the opportunity to perform with his friends, however, and aside from that, daniel’s inadequacy immediately becomes apparent.

yongsun and luda: vocal powerhouses in their own right. junmyeon: a solid vocal, but more importantly, able to charm the entire nation. daniel doesn’t even know how he can compete. it’s all he can hope that he’ll even survive, but his own elimination seems more eminent than ever.

early on, the team discusses whether they all got their first pick of songs, and daniel confesses this. “i was hoping i’d be on a team with sungwoon hyung or jinsoul,” he admits, and he quickly regrets it, eyes widening, and he shakes his head, clarifying-- “but i think you’re all great! i’m not disappointed!” it’s not entirely truthful, but they don’t need to know that. 

junmyeon says he misses him, and daniel’s about to make some childish comment about missing him more because he feels like he hasn’t properly seen him in months, the longest he’s gone without properly spending time with sungwoon in a near year, when junmyeon says, “don’t worry, i’ll be here for you in his absence. you can count on me.” daniel can’t help but smile, if only because the sentiment is heartwarming. “hmmm, i can see why people like you so much,” daniel replies, playfully, and his eyes disappear into crescents as he grins. 

yongsun takes the brunt of distributing lines, with luda assisting her, leaving daniel and junmyeon to their own devices- a horrible mistake, honestly. daniel listens to the song first, trying to familiarize himself with it, but before long, he and junmyeon get involved in a charisma showdown of a sort. naturally, this means junmyeon biting his lip in daniel’s general direction, and daniel bursting into laughter, covering his face in embarrassment. junmyeon wiggles his eyebrows, and daniel accepts his inevitable defeat without even putting up much of a fight. (at least he’s cute when he’s embarrassed-- he hopes.)

the girls have the line distribution done by then, and as they go over it, daniel’s heart sinks when he realizes he only really has two proper lines, then a few extra, small tidbits in the rest of the song. he knows it’s fair; he knows he lacks in vocal prowess by miles compared to the others, and that they need to put on a good performance, but in the back of his mind lurks the truth that this is an individual challenge with an individual ranking. what are his chances, if he barely sings, even in a song with only four people? he was hoping for at least a moment to try to shine-- an opportunity to do something with, even if ultimately, he fell short in the time he had.

he stays silent, keeping his concerns to himself for a few minutes, but when the team splits up to practice their parts individually, daniel lurks behind, and seeks out yongsun. “yong noona,” he ventures, unable to meet her eyes due to shame at first. “it’s about the line distribution. you worked really hard, and-- i know you all are much better singers than me, but i was wondering...if there are any other lines you think might suit me? i don’t want to be an inconvenience, but i was hoping i might be able to sing more.” at least he voices it well.

to his relief, yongsun is willing and eager to help him out, and she splits one of her choruses with them, allowing daniel to share her spotlight and harmonize with her, instead of her taking it entirely for herself. he doesn’t want to push his luck or yongsun’s patience, so he accepts these additional lines graciously. “thanks so much, noona,” he thanks her, and flashes her a bright smile, and he’s genuinely grateful. 

the week passes more slowly than others and more quickly all at once, with no choreography to split his attention. all he focuses on is his vocals, and putting on a good performance, and thankfully, yongsun is right there to help him.

he still doesn’t have much faith in his vocals, but he thinks he just might make it, and come performance day, might even hold his own.

 ⊰  ———– EPISODE SEVEN ⊱

there’s no time to waste. as they were the first song listed, so too are they the first team to perform. daniel’s thankful-- doesn’t want any more time to linger and get stuck in his head. as far as he’s concerned, the sooner they get the performance out of the way, the better. there’s no leader this time, all four of them theoretically created equal, and they walk out on stage together. (even knowing this truth, and having height over them, daniel still can’t help but feel small in comparison.)

“hello, we are shooting--” and they all form their hands into guns, shooting them off in time with the announcement of their name, “star!” (junmyeon got so into this introduction during practice, and daniel has no doubt he smashed it on stage, judging by the cheers of the audience.)

they run through their individual intros. “i am kang daniel, shooting star’s bassline,” he says, a throwback to his introduction during girl crush, and one he still thinks suits him and sums him up the best of them all. “are you ready to up the level again?” he cups his hand to his ear, turning his head toward the audience to goad them into cheering more, and when they do, he grins. 

with that, they take their spots on the stage, and their music kicks in-- background of their performance twinkling to go along with their name. 

yongsun opens up the song, well-deserved with a voice as enchanting as hers, and luda lends her voice to a harmony. it doesn’t take long for daniel’s turn to come, and his most significant lines, at that. he practiced these two over and over again, desperate to perfect them for this day.

i don’t want to forget the dream that approached us your lips that smiled towards me

he delivers it well, all of his practice paying off, and once his line is done, he feels a bit empty. all of that practice throughout the week for one moment of eyes on him, his voice carrying the melody. junmyeon sings after him, and undoubtedly garners more attention with his magnetic presence, making daniel’s own pale in comparison. yongsun and luda are untouchable vocal goddesses of the stage, and daniel is just...there.

the thoughts aren’t ideal for a performance, but thankfully, looking forlorn during the song is in style.  he tries to change his mindset-- tries to find enjoyment in the performance in case this one is his last. (he would deserve elimination, if it finally comes-- if he finally loses the race he’s run against it since the second episode, when the axe fell on hyunjoon instead of him.)

to do so, he thinks of the people that support him, and the lyrics of the song-- the friends he’s met, and how overall, this experience he joined spur of the moment to support sungwoon has become something treasured to him. instead of a love, like the lyrics allude to, daniel applies it to this show, and everyone chasing after their dreams together, and suddenly, it means a little more. 

he adds to the harmony at the end of the chorus build up, and then again during yongsun’s chorus-- the one she shared with him per his request, and he makes sure he sings strongly (with confidence, like she kept telling him) to make sure she doesn’t regret doing so. 

he gets the line at the end of the chorus, as well. 

it becomes a star

junmyeon belts out an “i remember,” leading into luda’s long stretch of vocals, and daniel sways a little along to the song, lips quirking up in the slightest smile, without breaking the expression of nostalgia on his face. he harmonizes with the others again, and then moves into his solo catchy little line, undoubtedly left to him because it was simple.

tu ru tu tu, yeah

this ushers in the bridge, the song elevating, yongsun’s voice rising in power. junmyeon chimes in, voice suitably dramatic, and yongsun and luda sing together, a loud yet beautiful harmony, as if their voices duel over destiny and light and vowing to see one another again. daniel thinks of this competition, and the separate paths they’ll all head down once it ends (soon) and daniel vows to remember all of this, too.

then comes the most dynamic part of the song-- yongsun belting out her line, and luda meeting her, two power vocals singing with all their might in a duo of high notes. they nail it, and daniel can’t help but smile the slightest bit.

they fly into another chorus, lighter and softer, yet their vocals shine through, and daniel gets an adlib, everyone singing one after another, over one another, in succession, voices melded together as result of all their practicing. 

i remember~

it’s perhaps his hardest line of the song, and daniel ventures higher in his range than he ever has on the show so far, and he succeeds. in comes the final chorus, everyone singing together, one individual voice standing out above the others at moments, like when daniel gives a short “oh,” or luda belts out another adlib high note. he and junmyeon sing together, their final lines of the song.

kept inside a star, i want to keep it

sphere.

truth be told, haknyeon’s never actually thought much about sphere. other than the fact that he knows of a few trainees there; he’s never actually considered sphere a company he’d be drawn to. not that he’d have much of a choice anyway. still, the building itself is a sight to behold. 

he stands in front of the building for a good few seconds, before letting out a deep breath. “here we go,” he breathes to himself, before he’s led to a practice room. 

the whole idea of teams –– or well, working in them –– wasn’t something completely foreign to haknyeon. he was after all, in a dance crew and most of the time that involved a lot of exchange of ideas. that with the added fact that his highschool life literally revolved around group projects and haknyeon’s own social personality, makes this challenge something he’s actually looking forward to. 

“noona,” he smiles when he sees sana. “i’m glad you’re on our team! it’s nice to see a familiar face,” haknyeon’s known sana for a while now, and despite being a few years younger than her, he stands a whole 12cm taller than the older girl. he laughs and gives her a high five. “i can’t wait for us to work together.”

they decide on rose as the leader, and haknyeon finds her the best choice, really. she’s got a background as a dance instructor and could perhaps lead the team best. 

“a 2011 song,” one of them says and it takes some thinking and a lot of talking before they finally decide on a classic. the boys. haknyeon, is more than happy with the song choice. he doesn’t mind that it’s a girl group song, if anything he’s happier with the fact that it’s a girl group song. there are a lot of sides of him that he’d like to showcase; and a song like the boys, he thought, would be able to show off how much more versatile he could be.

the choreography isn’t too tough –– at least, not completely to haknyeon. the formation though, is something that he finds himself looking over a few times. being in a dance crew had it’s benefits. aside from a way to let off stress and meet new people, it came with haknyeon’s added ability to catch onto movements fast. he watches the video a few times, over and over as he works on the dance of the boys.

the line distribution too has haknyeon front and center at the very start of the song and he wants to look fierce wants to grab the attention of everyone, to make them hyped for his team. and while it doesn’t take too long for him to learn the choreography of the song, there’s still the issue of the team coming together to perform it. one person alone doing well wouldn’t look good for the team’s overall image; which was quite honestly what worried him.

it was a team performance, and he wanted the team to do well; the last thing he’d want was to bring them down. while he was confident with his dancing in some aspects, there came the rapping parts as well. though, before he’d even ventured into dancing, haknyeon used to be more fond of rapping –– had even attempted to rap during his last few auditions before the mgas. this time, this time he’ll show them how much he’s improved.

the practice rooms are made available 24/7, which is great because haknyeon makes sure to utilize it. and he’s not the only. there in the practice room is yongsun as well, working as hard as ever on the choreography. it’s more of an open secret that yongsun isn’t the best at dancing, especially so in a group full of people that mostly specialized in dance. so to see her practicing over and over again is heart warming. “you’re doing great noona,” he gives her a thumbs up before his attention is diverted to his lines and his bottle. 

“ppyeosokbuteo,” he mouths the words, trying to enunciate them as clearly as possible when he feels a hand on his shoulder. he turns around to see none other than yongsun, looking at him.

“uhm –– could you maybe help me with this?” she asks, “i don’t fully –– understand, how this dance works –– i am not a very good dancer, so if you weren’t too busy, maybe you could help me?”

“of course,” he smiles. and he’s actually glad that she’s approached him for help. “i’ll help you out noona, don’t worry about it,” he puts his bottle aside before he focuses all his attention to the girl. “could you show me a little bit of what you know so far? i’ll help you dance like a pro by the end of this!”

haknyeon stares at yongsun intensely as she dances, trying his best to pick up on her movement; her strong parts and the parts that weren’t as strong, parts that he’d like to help her improve on. he bites on his lower lip as she dances and while he’s trying to be as serious as he can, there’s a little smile that escapes his lips as he watches her –– she’s adorable, really, even if she’s older than him. her hardworking attitude is adorable.

“mmm, okay noona,” he begins and he stands beside her as he guides her to face the mirror. “you’ve got the choreography down, which is great! but you don’t have enough control on your body. when you’re dancing, try to act as though you’re hitting something with your arms,” he gives her a demonstration before he moves to slowly lift her arms at an angle. “the angle of your arms and legs changes everything,” he adds. “hands like this, and legs like this.”

they spend the next few hours like so, with the both of them running through the choreography again. “oh and noona,” haknyeon says, “be confident. you’re a great singer and you’ll shine on the stage. believe in your dance, the team and i have got you.”

getting along with the team, he finds, isn’t hard at all. he gets closer to the older girls easily, they share laughter and moments together and he even finds himself joking around with doyeon often –– the both of them similar in age. they’ve all worked hard, he’s watched them work hard, and he wants to see them win.

to say he’s nervous would be an understatement. he’s performing in front of a live audience of 1000 people. that’s a lot more people than he’s used to. haknyeon probably doesn’t even know 1000 people. 

rose comes up to him and puts a hand on his shoulder, assuring him that everything’ll be okay. and he smiles at her gesture, she’s right. they’ve worked hard for this. “you all look great,” he finds himself saying to his teammates and they truly do, their outfits stand out and haknyeon’s amazed at his teams ability to coordinate this.

they’re called on stage as the second to perform and haknyeon does a little jump backstage before he walks out. “b-bring the boys out!” they all say together, and haknyeon makes sure to put on his brightest smile. “hello! we are milkshake!” he touches at the crown on his head, each of them have their own crowns but haknyeon feels a little more confident in his. it feels like a form of group solidarity.

he looks at the crowd and literally beams when he finds a signboard with his name on it, he’ll do well. he has to.

the moment they get into position, haknyeon changes the glint in his eyes. he’s made to stand at the center during the start of the performance, through the first few lines. he focuses on the performance, and tunes out the nervousness he’d felt before.

geobi naseo shijakjocha an hae bwattamyeon geudaen tudeoldaeji mara jom ( if you haven’t even started because you’re scared then stop complaining )

“chichi,” his hands go to his waist, eyes sharp as he says out the word. next are his legs as they synchronise with his teammates to the choreography of the song.

jujeohamyeon gihweneun modu neoreul bikyeo ga gaseum pyeogo nawa bwara jom  ( if you hesitate, opportunities will pass by you so open your heart and come out )

“t.r.x. bring the boys out,” he lifts his brows, looking confident as his body moves along to the memorised choreography. “we bring the boys out, we bring the boys out, yeah,” he walks outwards, towards the front of the stage during these lines, confident as he does so. b-bring the boys out, he puts a hand on his chin and winks with a slight smirk on his face.

the line, he thought, felt fitting. after all, haknyeon was the only boy on the team and they were quite literally bringing a boy out. 

he moves on to the next formation and the first verse begins. he moves like he’s practiced nights for, immerses himself in the choreography and the feel of the song. there’s a lot of posing during this part, and haknyeon does so as he says his lines –– albeit, in this portion, short. “get up,” he says, lifting his brows once more, “that’s funny.”

the song continues and he can tell his teammates are trying their best as well. the chorus hits and haknyeon lifts his hands up as they walk to the front of the stage, in sync. fierce, he needs to look fierce and confident.

“ wipungdo dangdanghaji ppyeossokbuteo neon weollae meotjeosseo you know the girls ( you are majestic and strong you were always cool you know the girls ) ”

it’s his part, a short rap segment, and he walks forward once more. eyes are on him and he delivers his lines, with his lips curved upwards slightly for an added effect. he puts his hand on his chest at the lines ‘ you are majestic and strong ’. and at the words ‘ you know the girls ’ he lifts his thumbs to point at his teammates, before he winks. “b-bring the boys out.” 

the song continues on and haknyeon moves to his formation, dances as he’s practiced, confident and fully enjoying the song and performing with his team. he feels himself on the stage, feels the eyes of the audience looking at him, cheering their team on, and he feeds off of that energy.

he has a line in the chorus where he’s front and center again and he makes sure to deliver it strongly. “jeon segega neoreul jumokae (the entire world is focusing on you),” and yeah, it felt like that. 

and then, the beat drop.

they all fall onto the floor, leg stretched out. haknyeon does so smoothly, as he waits for rose to say her lines before he stands up, walks confidently to the front of the stage as he raps out his part.

“ sesang namjadeuriyeo nan No. 1 jihyereul juneun Athena, check this out ( i will lead you, come out the boys of the world, i’m No. 1 ) ”

before he delved deeper into the world of dance, haknyeon had always been fond of rap. he’d been a rapper before he’d truly fell for dance and he still loved rapping. perhaps with a more rap heavy song, he could’ve showcased a little more, but he takes these lines that he has to show them what he can do. that he’s more than just a dancer with a pretty face and a big name sister. 

the stage is his to control at that moment and he does so, lifts a finger to show that he’s number one. “check this out!” 

it’s rose’s lines again before it goes to him.

“ geudaero jjuk ganeun geoya Keep up Milkshake Generation, we don’t stop ( just keep going like that, keep up Milkshake Generation, we don’t stop ) ”

he wags his finger to the crowd as he steps up and he feels like he’s having the time of his life right about now. haknyeon changes the word “girls generation” to milkshake generation because now the stage was theirs to own and he felt like he was doing so. 

they continue dancing, formations constantly changing, movement constantly sharp. before the last chorus, he gets on his knees before he stands up at the lines, ‘girls bring the boys out’.

the last chorus comes and he lifts his arms, eyes sharp and confident. and just like how he’d had some of the opening lines, he has some of the ending lines as well.

he steps up towards the front of the stage, completely in his zone, completely ready and confident.

“ sesangeul ikkeul namja meotjin yeojadeul yeogi moyeora you know the girls ( all the boys who will lead the world all the awesome girls, gather here you know the girls ) ” 

like he’s calling for them he lifts his hand, turns to the camera and with his finger, as though beckoning for them to come over and join him and milkshake. 

b-bring the boys out.

they all pose at the end of the song, and haknyeon feels high on performance, if that’s even a way to describe a feeling. they stay in their pose and haknyeon, finally takes in everything. he takes in the cheers, the audience and the fact that he’d just performed with his team in front of a thousand people. ha, he’d did it.

sungwoon doesn’t let any of his disappointment show while congratulating his team. part of being a leader means you have to make sure your teammates have confidence in themselves and their own hard work, so he hypes up their survival for all it’s worth. he doesn’t think their rank is a reflection of their shortcomings anyway; everyone did a fantastic job. the fault probably lies with sungwoon, and he accepts responsibility for it. he was the weakest dancer in their group, and maybe that’s where they lost points? either way, it was his job to make sure they shone up on that stage, and while he’s glad he was able to keep his promise to mingyu, he wishes he could’ve delivered more for his team. 

but sungwoon sets it aside for a moment to congratulate daniel. from someone who didn’t want to be here to the winner of the week’s challenge—and with a band concept too! it further affirms sungwoon’s belief that daniel is talented and deserves to be here just as much as everyone else, and that he truly shines when he gets the chance to do what he’s good at. after daniel and his team are done celebrating, sungwoon tackles him in a hug, laughing and pretending not to notice daniel’s tears. “i knew you had it in you,” he says. privately, he hopes the win will help daniel believe in himself more as well. 

if only sungwoon could believe in himself. his earlier confidence stripped, he goes back home after the filming and tosses and turns in bed before giving up on sleep and trudging to the nearest corner store to get some spicy ramen. while he eats, he runs simulations of team f’s performance in his head, attempting to figure where they went wrong or what they could’ve done better. there are too many answers, in the end, and he gives up before he can start feeling worse about himself. as leader, he should have—

but he’s not the leader anymore. tomorrow, he meets a new team and starts fresh. it’s a little terrifying; sungwoon isn’t the biggest fan of rapid change, but then again, he should’ve kept that in mind before he joined this competition. there’s nothing he can do except force himself to adapt to the circumstances and do his best. sungwoon might’ve been the weak link in his team last time, but he refuses to fall into the same complacency this week. if he works his ass off and plays to his strengths, maybe he’ll avoid ending up in the same position (or worse). 

if it doesn’t work out—well. that’s something else. 

sungwoon doubts this week will be as fun as the last one. there’s more of a learning curve associated with this challenge, more growing pains when it comes to settling in with team a. initially, he thinks he won’t be able to vibe well with them. the whole group intimidates sungwoon; they have two number one winners in junmyeon and rose, with junhoe and somi placing second together. all strong candidates, all people to watch for, while sungwoon is… not. calling it an inferiority complex would be going too far, but he’s definitely afraid of fading into the background during their performance.

he remains muted during their first meeting, not really speaking much at the beginning. with a new team comes a new building to practice in as well. all he knows of royal entertainment is sayyes, and the new practice room is strange after spending two whole weeks in the kt building. fidgeting in his seat, he looks pretends to be fascinated by his new surroundings to get away from the awkwardness. once they actually start talking, it’s a different story. everyone in team a is pretty nice and sungwoon feels foolish for assuming the worst of them. like him, they’re also people trying to do their best to survive in this competition.

loosening up considerably after that, he makes more of an effort to be involved. the first (almost amusing) obstacle they hit is that of the team leader. junmyeon, junhoe, rose, and sungwoon have all held the position before, which means the title falls on their youngest, somi. she seems a little panicked at the prospect, but the rest assure her they’ll be here to support and help out if she starts feeling overwhelmed. sungwoon feels a sharp pang of sympathy for her; it’s a lot to put on a kid’s shoulders on top of the competition itself. the rules are a bit cruel in this regard, but there’s nothing they can really do about it.

song selection comes next. they grab a couple of mashups off the internet to choose from: one is a combination of bts’ save me and mamamoo’s starry night, and the other is a combination of sistar’s i like it, twice’s heartbreaker, and red velvet’s rookie. neither tracks are really to sungwoon’s taste. truthfully, he’d want to do something like a ballad or, more dangerous but more satisfying as well, a rock song, but he decides to conform for the sake of the team and votes for save me and starry night. it’s not ideal, but he thinks it’s the more vocally interesting song of the two choices and is relieved when it wins out.

rose offers to work on the choreography with somi’s help, and sungwoon’s grateful for that. the majority of their team aren’t dancers and couldn’t pull off anything close to bts’ choreography, so adjustments are necessary. while that gets worked out, sungwoon focuses on learning the vocal parts. once again, he lost out to junhoe for the main vocal position, the same thing having happened in team dynamiq previously. he honestly doesn’t mind—junhoe is the better singer and sungwoon has no problems with the line distributions. if he wants to fight for a position like that, he’s just going to have to work harder and hone his skills.

while rehearsing, sungwoon slides over to junmyeon and, with an embarrassed laugh, asks the man for his autograph “for my sister in hong kong.” she’s only been asking sungwoon to get this since episode one aired, and while he’s been too intimidated by junmyeon to ask before, he has no excuse not to when they’re in a team together. surprisingly, junmyeon reacts shyly to the request, which throws sungwoon for  loop—he always imagined junmyeon, at least, would be used to the attention, but he’s just as embarrassed as sungwoon while giving the autograph. sungwoon laughs and asks him to throw an extra one in signed to sungwoon as well. he’s sure it’ll be worth a lot someday.

the choreography is, once again, the hard part of the week’s performance. sungwoon’s pleased to discover he isn’t the worst dancer of the group, but he’s not the best of them either. in order to make up for that, he spends every moment he can practicing, even sleeping overnight in the practice room to minimize the commute from his house to the royal building. he’s pretty sure his housemates might burn down their home in his absence, but the stakes are high this week and the expectations even higher. sungwoon even comes fully prepared, packing a pillow and his favorite pokemon blanket to bust out during the night.

junmyeon becomes his partner in dance-related struggles, his comrade in incoordination. rose and somi are helpful when it comes to learning the dance, but most of his jokes are shared with junmyeon, since he’s the one who can truly understand sungwoon’s pain here. most days, they practice right into the night in order to not bring the team down and do their parts right. one night, they just fall asleep next to each other, both too tired to even think about leaving.

the following morning, sungwoon’s woken up by a scream; somi, having come in early to set up, is shocked to find junmyeon and sungwoon asleep side by side. still bleary eyed, he yells instinctively and darts upright into a crouch vaguely resembling some kind of martial arts stance at the thought of an intruder, but it’s just their baby leader, as he’s taken to calling her.

sungwoon rubs his eyes and tries to flatten his hair while apologizing, but junmyeon doesn’t seem to be making the same efforts, instead shooting him a wink and finger guns while looking sleepy and yet effortlessly good. sungwoon feels cheated. robbed. hoodwinked. he stares into the camera like he’s on the office and says “did i ask for this? no. am i getting it? yes. am i slightly jealous god has not given me the ability to wink? also yes.” he gets the junmyeon hype now, he does. dude is just that handsome and charismatic.

the day before filming, sungwoon ducks out for a couple of hours to get his hair dyed. it’s something he’s always wanted to try after coming to seoul but could never work up the nerve to. now is as good a time as any, though, and he goes for a bold color: red. cherry red, in fact, but the descriptor just makes him think of team fresh n’ fruity. he misses them, truly. especially cherry yerim, who he learned had dropped out of the competition for personal reasons. part of him panicked at first—was it because of him? was it because they’d come in fourth?—but she’s doing what she has to and he’s proud of her for making such a difficult decision. he tries to stay in touch with the rest as much as he can, and though they’re all busy, they promise to meet up soon.

team f would’ve definitely made fun of his new hairdo, or the fact that sungwoon seriously suggested wearing jorts on stage during their performance. team a is kinder and don’t tease him about his sudden hair color change (no ronald mcdonald jokes, at least). by the end of the week, he’s relaxed more into his group, and while it’s not the fast friendships and good times of team f, sungwoon genuinely likes these people too. they’re not so different from him, and he feels dumb for thinking they were at first. he’s truly honored to have gotten the chance to work with them, and they’re in this together, for better or for worse

unlike previous fridays, sungwoon’s team is up first to perform. he’s too used to waiting till the end of the show to take the stage that he almost forgets and manages to make it onstage just in time, only a little short of breath from having sprinted to get here. they named themselves ‘team celestial’ to fit with the theme of starry night, and playing off the joke, he introduces himself as the contestant with the angelic voice. it’s a little weird, standing up here showing a different face than he usually does. his hair color has faded a little from the vibrant firetruck red to a more subdued garnet, brushed back and styled up to #freetheforehead. he’s wearing pink too, a far cry from usual fair (especially if you count empty enigma), but it suits the theme and sungwoon feels good in it. 

he feels good about this performance too. sungwoon doesn’t want to enter into this doubting himself or his team’s hard work over the course of the week. while it’s true creativity wasn’t their strongest suit, save for maybe rose, they still tried hard to put together a performance worthy of this stage. he’d be doing them a disservice if he got up there alongside them with anything but the fullest of confidence in their abilities. giving his team a nod and a grin, sungwoon takes his position and waits for the music to start. 

sungwoon gets to utilize his lower register more at the beginning, something he hasn’t really been able to during this competition. there’s a lot more to his voice that he hasn’t been able to show at all and hopes he’ll get the chance to before his luck really runs dry and he’s asked to leave. he delivers his lines smoothly, working in tandem with junhoe, his mind running on overdrive as it juggles clean vocals, choreography, and charisma all at once. he’s always going to put his voice above the other two, but working with this versatile group of people has made him reconsider some things too. 

the shadow of the darkness remaining in the deep night drawing out a light

give me your hand save me save me i need your love before i fall, fall

the overlapping chorus is busy, with each vocal getting a part of their own to sing. timing is just as important as delivery here, and no one person should overpower the rest. it’s a tough balance to strike but sungwoon thinks the team does a good job, all the while following the choreography rose made for them. he puts more faith in his dancing that previous weeks; sungwoon’s put in the work and has come to realize that, if he’s not confident in his own moves, other people won’t be receptive to them either. after watching junmyeon practice, he’s also learned how important expressions are, and does more to channel those to the camera and audience than in previous weeks. 

save me save me save me 

save me save me save me

ya ya ya yi ya

save me save me 

the girls are the rappers of this team, and sungwoon finds that really cool—he has limited experience with the genre, but he thinks they do a good job with the material they have. somi, especially, has taken on rapping in addition to vocals and the leader title; he really hopes people see all the hard work she’s put into this team despite being the youngest. he hopes people can support all of them. yes, there are people here who’ve tasted or almost tasted victory before, but now that sungwoon’s seen how much of themselves they give to their performances, he thinks it’s well deserved. no one should make the mistake of thinking they’re coasting because of mnet or anything; they’ve worked their asses off to get here. 

starry night, it’s a starry night you blow over to me

starry night 

starry night

his vocal delivery is more restrained than normal during this performance, since his parts lack the ability to really ‘go off,’ so sungwoon tries to make up for it in his energy and his dedication to the dance and making sure the stage looks good. there’s so much to being an idol that he didn’t realize before, but he’s learning slowly and surely, thanks to the efforts of the people he’s met during this competition. he wants to do well for himself, but also to honor them. he wouldn’t be here—hell, he wouldn’t be able to do this—if it weren’t for all his teammates, former and present. 

( starry night, it’s a starry night you blow over to me ) give me your hand save me save me i need your love before i fall, fall

starry night

starry night