What Ifs, paradox, overthinking and anxiety...

All too familiar to those that are the INFP type. Crisis after crisis of the possibilities. Sometimes carrying a weight so heavy that we can barely take it anymore. Then when it seems that we can handle ourselves, we take on the problems and burdens of others. The weight crushes us and again get heavier as the time moves on. It can send us into a spiraling sadness and even depression. A never ending circle that makes us think constantly. Thinking of a situation 25 ways. Even if the situation is not real. Some of it is protection for ourselves. Some of it is daydreaming and playing. Allowing our minds to escape down a path that could be likely, yet even if is not, we allow ourselves to go down it anyway. 

But what about us? How many times are we supposed to sit and suffer? When do we call it? When do we finally say we're done and throw up our hands? Do we not because it would actively mean that in the end we are giving up in humanity in a way? Or is it something more than that. I couldn't tell you. I just know that I hate the fact that so much has shaped me to be rough around edges at times. I used to be so soft and able to feel, but now, I've been hurt a lot. There is so much scar tissue, that I don't know if things will ever go back. I've had those that I trusted most walk out or hurt me worse than I ever thought they could. I remember a time when I wasn't this way. And though I hate how it makes me feel I know that I have to get this way before I change. Before I look out for myself I have to be beaten down to the point of bloody and exhausted. And it sucks but this is what seems to be part of us as a type. It's just always a disappointment when it happens. It just makes me question why it takes so long. Am I the only one? The only one that gives chance after chance until I have no more to give? Or is it a thing we face as a type.... maybe?

-Best

1. Micro-management

2. Don’t Publicly Call Us Out

3. Don’t Expect Us to Change

4. Don’t Assume We’re Stupid

If separation is what you want, separation is what you have. If unity is what you want, consider the OPPOSITE of your actions thus far.

We are Space Monkey.

11/9

- by Dr. David Coppola, Holistic Doctor, DC, Author

According to doctors Richard Bandler and John Grinder, the founders and developers of NLP (neuro-linguistic programming), a thought virus is a “free- floating” belief in our system that we cannot link to a specific reference experience. In other words, we believe something without knowing why we believe it. Such thought viruses are often outside our awareness, even though they might strongly influence our behavior and decisions.

Thought viruses are subconscious patterns that become ingrained in our being. They become activated as we are exposed to challenges we view as hopeless and when we are feeling helpless.

So, who is responsible for this conditioning and programming? Who is spreading the viruses? Our teachers, parents, clergy and peers...that’s who.

In other words, thought viruses arise from the perceived challenging experiences and happenings of growing up.

What if we are forced, by a mild form of temporary insanity, to disconnect from a thought? Or how about a time when you didn’t have a strategy to express a thought or emotion and instead you internalized it? Perhaps your difficulty in verbalizing was due to perceived communicative barriers—in other words, you were not able to express your hidden feelings.

Maybe you have decided from past “learned” experiences that people cannot be trusted. There you were, dating the class valedictorian from an Ivy League school—and please note, this can apply to any promising romantic relationship, regardless of your partner’s alma mater! Perhaps you were thinking something along the lines of, “Do I really deserve to feel this much love, this much joy...the potential for togetherness, stability and financial success?” Unfortunately, you may have bowed out of the relationship from the fear of being abandoned and hurt, when success was on the doorstep. Don’t beat yourself up. You acted out of self-defense and self-protection. It wasn’t a weakness. It was, however, a thought virus. You simply didn’t, at the time, have the tools, strategies and support to stay connected to fulfill a dream. Be willing to “un-learn” what you have learned from your misfortunes or so-called “bad” experiences.

Thought viruses come in four different forms: triggering, limiting, killer and Gemini.

A Triggering Thought Virus

Triggering thought viruses can be activated when we are experiencing a situation that “triggers” a protective, aggressive or defensive response. If we are bombarded with triggering thought viruses we begin to live in a “cause-and- effect” world instead of creating our reality. Something happens and we end up acting out the same scenario time and time again. A wise man named Dr. Victor Frank once told me, “If you keep doing what you’ve always been doing, you’re going to get what you’ve always gotten.”

An example of a triggering thought virus would be if whenever someone cuts you off while driving, you immediately curse the other driver and perhaps even give them a nasty gesture. This leads to feelings of frustration, anger and what is known as road rage. This virus, which overcomes the mind, foregoes any etiquette training and dodges the diplomatic filter within your brain.

The subconscious reactive mind is then activated and responds inappropriately. Triggering thought viruses can escalate into arrogance and disrespect in social situations. For example, suppose you are disrespectfully cut off during a conversation and then you automatically respond in a cheeky, condescending manner. This is certainly not in your innate loving-kind nature, but a triggering effect occurred.

A Limiting Thought Virus

Limiting thought viruses are non-physical in nature. However, they do affect the whole body just like a cold or flu virus can. They cause symptoms like stomachaches or headaches, as do flu viruses, but they are derived from subconscious thought patterns. Limiting thought viruses, like their microscopic cousins—the cold and flu viruses, arise when we are vulnerable or overwhelmed. Viral “bugs” are opportunists in that they overtake the body when the environment is ripe for attack and the immune system is compromised.

Imagine you are a fourteen-year-young man and your baseball coach tells you after countless attempts at hitting curveballs, “Ah, forget it son, you’ll never hit a curve ball!” Fast forward a few years and you are an extremely talented eighteen-year-old third baseman in college with an opportunity to try out for a major league team. What happens? You fail to impress the scout because you struck out six times in a row as you were thrown seventy mph curve balls.

Meanwhile, in batting practice, you were hitting ninety mph fast balls out of the park. It wasn’t that you couldn’t hit a curve ball. It was that you thought you weren’t able to because of a limiting thought virus. In this example a limiting thought virus affects the body’s ability to overcome the conditioned belief of the mind. One very effective way to treat a limiting thought virus is to re-visit it, then clear or harmonize it using The LifeLine Technique.

Here’s another example of a limiting thought virus. A seven-year-young girl struggles to finish her math homework. She’s only in second grade and it’s getting late in the evening. Her mom is going over her worksheet and finds she’s got almost half the problems wrong and says, “Don’t worry dear; you’ll never be good at math. I wasn’t, and neither was my mother. I believe it’s in our genes. Let’s go to bed.” From that point on, it’s possible this little girl will grow up believing she’ll never be adept at mathematics. She may even suffer from math scores that hover around sixty percent, barely passing, and she may actually come to hate numbers, figures, algebra, geometry and accounting. She may miss all the fun with math, which I, personally, have found to augment problem solving. After all, with math, you know when you’ve got it right or not. It is an exact science. And when you get it, it’s very rewarding and has applications throughout our lives, from creating budgets to calculating tips to financial planning.

We overcome challenges by being creative and by realizing there are infinite possibilities available to us in this world. As children, we begin the process of living on purpose and developing a sense of self-worth by realizing that we have the ability to succeed. This belief becomes an invaluable character trait when problems and challenges arise. Limiting thought viruses get in the way of growing and learning and can make life quite difficult. Thought viruses contribute to imbalances in physical health, which in turn can lead to medical diagnoses and treatment. This process sometimes can give rise to additional limiting thought viruses. For example, a physician can lead you to believe you have to be on a medicine for the rest of your life, or a chiropractor can lead you to believe you need to be adjusted every week for the rest of your life. But remember, anything is possible and you have options.

I was traveling in Southeast Asia in the summer of 2005 with my dear friend Dr. Darren Weissman, who is the developer of The LifeLine Technique. While we were touring Bangkok, Darren decided to have his fortune told by an awesome-looking old Thai man. This wise-looking, yet frail, long-bearded source of ancient wisdom told Darren he would live a long, prosperous life and be a gift to those who knew him, learned from him, and followed him. All of this is true!

Darren is now an internationally renowned holistic doctor, speaker, educator and best-selling author of The Power of Infinite Love & Gratitude.

Besides being incredibly accurate with his palm reading and his use of the Chinese calendar wheel, he proceeded to tell Darren he would die around the age of eighty-four, to which Darren immediately proclaimed “Wow! I’m going to clear that limiting thought virus right now!” We both had a good laugh afterwards and moved on to tour Bangkok’s Grand Palace.

A Killer Thought Virus

Killer thought viruses are a combination of multiple triggering and multiple limiting thought viruses. They are responsible for acts of suicide and severe depression. They literally program a person into living in death modes. Killer thought viruses lead to complete breakdown of the bodily systems that are designed to protect and cooperate in a holistic manner. They are often associated with the cause of cancer and they must be detected and harmonized or cleared to allow for a shift into the awareness that “life has meaning.”

Like other thought viruses, killer thought viruses can be harmonized and cleared by using The LifeLine Technique. If untreated, cells invaded by a killer thought virus can move from anaplasia to dysplasia and finally present themselves as cancer cells. After harmonization and clearing of a killer thought virus, these same cells can progress into healthy cells. After all, it’s in their nature to be healthy!

The cells in our bodies have always maintained an ability to regenerate healthy, vibrant living tissues. It’s just our conditioned minds that succumb to the accelerated degeneration we see so often. The fact is, all humans have the ability to live to be ninety to one-hundred-plus years of age. Sometimes we find ourselves believing in the limiting thought virus of: “I probably will die around age seventy-five, because both my father and grandfather died at that age.” Talk about digging your own grave at such a young age these days. Personally, I’m thinking, “Wow, I’ve reached fifty years of age. I’m so happy I’ve still got half of my life left to live, love and laugh!”

A Gemini Thought Virus

Gemini thought viruses are examples of times when we think we need to be someone else in a certain situation or when we are feeling like we need to hide our true selves due to the pressure of compromising circumstances. This is where shame and guilt perpetuate. Gemini thought viruses can be likened to a clown who is wearing a painted face of a huge smile but deep down inside he feels very sad.

This is when we struggle to accept who we are and in turn portray who we think we should be. In effect it reveals fakeness about us. When we are not able to embrace ourselves, others will likewise find us unappealing. To overcome Gemini thought viruses, we must embrace all sides and all parts of ourselves, both the positive and negative.

One of the most respected, brilliant teachers of Indian Ayurvedic medicine is Dr. Deepak Chopra. He has taught me many things. One of the more profound concepts he professes is, “If you were to pick out ten characteristics of someone you really admire and then ten characteristics of someone you really despise...know that you are a combination of all of these twenty traits!” If you don’t possess those ten traits you despise in others, you would never have the awareness to pick them out in the first place!

It is when we become aware of the negatives that we create the opportunity to consciously choose to change. This is when we can appreciate contrast of character and act to better ourselves.

One of the most spiritually enriching books I have read is The Eye of the I: From Which Nothing is Hidden by David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D. We all know when we are trying to fool ourselves or when we rationalize by talking ourselves into or out of something. When this happens we are parasitic or vulnerable to Gemini thought viruses.

Remember, Gemini thought viruses are the cause of a projected smile on your face, even when you are feeling depressed inside. Universally, we choose to be happy and want to get better—we want to feel better if we are feeling bad, and we want to get better at anything that is difficult for us. Granted, it is much easier to get better at what we are already good at. But the concept of work comes in when we realize we need to improve one of our weaknesses. Choose to be patient and peaceful. Choose to be fair. And always, always choose LOVE.