#hq reader

★ kuroo would 100% think you're trying to tease him and get freaky. but when he sees you're asleep, he smiles to himself and shakes his head before kissing yours. he takes a picture of you with him smirking at the camera, and texts it to you so you see it when you wake up––'even in your sleep you're trying to get in my pants ;)'

★ oikawa loves it because it means he's rubbing off on you. he literally sleeps with a hand down your pants cause it's comfy. will physically move your hand to hold his waistband if you don't do it one day (he gets pouty if you don't give him attention).

★ tsukishima pretends to be annoyed but when you stop randomly one day, he huffs and can't sleep. literally makes noise for you to telepathically understand and put your hand back.

★ ushijima raises a brow but doesn't move your hand, it's weirdly kind of comforting. he'll put his hand on top of yours and lightly rub his thumb in a soothing pattern.

Shifting foot to foot, hands clenching and unclenching Hirugami stared at the steps leading to the second floor, where she was.

It was right by the corner of the area, the apartment complex sandwiched between other apartment buildings. Where not long ago, he had walked her home from a summer festival, just enjoying their youth as they should.

While the skies were decorated in bright, vibrant colors, he was experiencing what it felt like to feel someone’s lips pressed against yours – a moment shared by both, a moment he will forever cherish.

The burst of fire flowers painting the night sky could well express his burning emotions then, each color into the night like paint to a canvass.

And she was kissing him back, her soft lips pressing and melding against his. Fingers ran through his mess of a hair, burning with every touch.

That was the moment that changed everything for them both. And it could have gone in any other way, had he not taken her home afterwards.

Indirectly, he felt guilty for it.

After what happened, (Y/N) stayed with Myungim-san, her legal guardian, much to her surprise. (“It kinda makes sense now why she’s so inviting and warm towards me. And why she checks up on me a lot.”)

Despite fully knowing that it was an already pre-existing case, he wished things had gone differently. But what was the point in dwelling on that?

It was a hard, bitter pill to swallow.

A knock, each rap were in tune to the beating in his heart.

A rustle, the doorknob turned, revealing the familiar kind elderly woman. Smiling warmly at him, he returned the smile - albeit shakily, before he stepped aside to let (Y/N) walk out.

Meeting his gaze, her eyes seemed to brighten a bit, as though drawing strength from his presence.

Turning to the elderly woman, she announces her leave and two began walking. Walking past the building, towards the station, out the station, uphill their school.

The walk to school was silent, but he knew better than to push it, wanting only to make her feel comfortable as much as she can.

Seeing her bandaged arm, it hurt to see it, especially when he knew who was responsible for it.

Dressed in her summer uniform, it was unavoidable. And now, everyone saw, but not everyone knew.

Trying to settle into normal proved to be more a challenge without having to accidentally trigger some synapses from their usual routine. More than anything, worry unsettled his nerves. Worry turning to guilt, guilt turning to fear.

Her life would never be the same again, whatever sense of normalcy she was trying to achieve and gain was hanging by a thread.

Still, (Y/N) stuck by him.

Just like he promised.

Despite it all, their relationship remained as is, despite the obvious change. To their friends though, they knew there was something deeper in their relationship.

Pretending not to notice the way the distance between them closed, how at times they would be sharing a touch, a look.

“Ara~” someone said by the entryway, just as she was taking her shoes off.

Noticeably, the tall brunet shockingly wavered.

“What the-“ Hirugami choked, a surprising first for her. “nee-san, you’re here?”

“What an uncute greeting, you dork.”

Unsure how to deal with the situation, (Y/N) could only stand there, watching as the siblings interacted. Shifting slightly from her spot, she peered over to look over the tall lad’s frame to get a glimpse.

Hirugami Sachiko.

Hirugami’s older sister by four years.

“Good afternoon,” the younger girl greeted with a short bow tentatively, the older teen quickly turning to her.

“Ah, afternoon~” her eyes, sharper and more mischievous than that of her younger brother’s narrowed at her. “You must be (L/N) (Y/N), right?”

“Yes,”

“I’ve heard lots about you~”

“Pardon?”

“Nee-san, seriously, why are you here?” Hirugami cuts, narrowing his eyes at her.

“Can’t I visit?”

“You have a boyfriend.” There was a clear ‘duh’ to his tone, exasperated. Rare to hear from him.

“I’m not banned from my own house just because of said boyfriend,” the older sister – Sachiko, replies easily, brushing hair over her shoulder.

“Still, don’t you usually stay there until you forget you have a home?”

Brown eyes narrowing at her little brother, she then slid her eyes towards the guest at the door, watching the sibling back-and-forth.

“Piece of shit, ain’t he?” she asks aloud, almost obnoxiously.

Blinking, surprised to be even included in, she was just about to reply before a hand grabbed her wrist. “Excuse us!”

There was no way Hirugami Sachiko was going to let her brother live this down, watching as her blushing brother took his guest into their house. Oh, Fukuro’s gonna want to hear this!

To say the least since the incident, she’s been scared to go back home. It couldn’t be helped since Myungim-san owned the building meanwhile her aunt – father’s sister, works overseas and isn’t available at the moment to take care of her.

At first, Hirugami worried that she might have to move away. But no, she was to stay. She wanted to say. He’d like to say that it was thanks to him, but that would be selfish and conceited of him, it was her own choice. Not like she had any place to go anyway, when her whole family’s a Nagano native.

So as he watched her, play music from her (new) phone, sounds blaring from a Bluetooth speaker she owned, filling the room with music.

They sat by his bed, listening in. Then she leaned against him, him and his sturdy frame.

And then, they were lying on his bed, centimetres crossed, staring at each other as the music played.

Somewhere in his room lay Pan, sleeping away as though joining them in their quest to just lay down.

“Hey,” she called out to him.

“Hm?”

(E/c) on brown.

She shifts her slightly, allowing strands of blue to fall. His fingers twitched, itching.

“Where do you see yourself in five years?”

He raised a brow at that. “Wow, getting way ahead of ourselves now are we?”

Pulling her hand back, he easily caught the punch headed her way. Breathing a laugh while he’s at it, the jerk. “Just answer the goddamn question.”

“Hm,” with just a brush of his thumb over her knuckles, her balled fists opened up to him.

“I’d probably be a veterinarian.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,”

“Not a volleyball player, like your brother and sister.”

He quirked a smile at that. “Nah, it’s not my thing.”

Inching closer, his eyes slide from her hands in his to her face, just inches- centimeters from his.

“Should’ve guessed,” her voice was a quiet whisper, like of the singer from the current song. “veterinarian kinda suits you though.”

He smiles, reaching over a free hand to run his finger over her cheek.

“I broke up with volleyball way before I met you, from when Kourai-kun and I met. In his words, ‘maybe you’re just burn out from it’.”

This time, she hums, smaller fingers threading with his. Corners of her lips curl up, prettying her features.

“…how about you?” he finds himself asking, almost carefully. “where do you see yourself in five years?”

In the background, a new song begins with guitar strumming, long enough before the lyrics play in with a rather dark and obvious prose. However, the paragraph ends on a light note.

I will follow you into the dark

Unable to help himself, he hums at that particular line. The lyric left lingering through his head.

It takes however that long until she finally replies, as though wanting the song to filter out her thought process, to guide her thoughts, wanting to listen to the song with her.

“I want to be a singer.” As soon as she says that though, she huffs, shaking her head. “What a farfetched dream, huh?”

He doesn’t laugh with her though, face serious. Reaching out a hand, he takes her chin and gently guides it to face him.

Realistically speaking, yes, the music career is a troubling and unpredictable one. Although his information about it is limited, he’s heard quite enough to get a gist about it from her whenever she talks about playing support. But a dream is a dream – big or small, it was no laughing matter even if it were your own.

“Maybe so,” he starts. “however, I’ve heard you sing. And you play like six instruments, you’re basically a one-woman band.”

Her mouth thins, (e/c) lost, muddled.

“Music is your passion,” he adds, could still hear the roar of waves accompanied by guitar strumming.

She could only hum, eyes softening, near gleaming – gratitude filling them. Carefully, she extends out her hand, fingers brushing over his thick hair, his fringe. Closing his eyes, he relishes at the feeling of her fingers, feeling tingles through his spine. It was almost enough to lull him to sleep.

“Hey,” there was a slight croak in her voice, something she ignores as she continues. Both eyes were open now, locked on her. “if you were to send a message to your future self, what would you say?”

The question weighs on heavy, allowing the brunet to mull over. Somewhere in his room, Pan sleepily turns to his side, just as a familiar song starts to play.

“I don’t know exactly what I’d want to say to myself,” honestly, he could still hear the beach waves, her guitar strumming, her sweet, sweet voice. “but…I just hope he’s happy.”

She latches on to his words, allowing them to simmer, sink. Eventually her expression morphs into something dream-like, hopeful even.

“Me, too.”

To get Hoshiumi Kourai to understand the whole thing was tricky. He wasn’t dumb, per se, he was actually quite sharp and scarily observant. It’s just that, when it comes to finding a solution for things he only has one option: act. Whereas for Hirugami, he takes into consideration a lot of things.

It was his innate nature to be curious, to carefully poke at them first, study even, before coming to a solution.

It’s probably not the best approach, but there are a billion people on this earth anyway and a billion of them definitely have their own way of approaching things.

This was his.

Still, getting his best friend to try and understand his way was a challenge way in itself than it already has.

Most especially, because it concerned matters of the heart.

“But this...” he thought of blue hair, (e/c) eyes, the scars on her skin, the softened expression on her face when she talked about her dad, the high on her face during the summer festival. “even if I acted on them now, when things aren't really settled,” he released a sigh, “I may end up killing us both.”

Hoshiumi said no more, deciding to respect his best friend's wishes.

Which lasted for about some months after they graduated.

“What the heck man, you’re just gonna leave it like that!?” came his best friend’s booming and scolding voice.

Though it was a conversation on the phone, be in the same city (since the university of his choice was in Tokyo, an hour away from Nagano), just kilometers away from each other, but the white-haired teen’s voice was as loud as ever.

“Boy are you loud as ever, huh?” It honestly felt like he was in the same room as him.

“Fuck you, man, seriously.”

He smiled at that, staring at the horizon – a landscape of buildings, a concrete jungle. The air was different – stale, dry. Everything was a dull, void of color and life. Just…lacking.

It was thanks to his brother that he could get the chance to move to Tokyo and find even a good veterinarian school. Good veterinarian schools were hard to find nowadays.

Unfortunately – or fortunately, depending on who’s asking – being at Tokyo means he was at the mercy of crowded masses, the famed rush hour and umbrella stealing, his brother and one Hoshiumi Kourai.

(“You are such an asshole,” someone told him a night ago. “Just thank your lucky stars you have connections that led you to do what you want!”)

Faintly, he could hear, from a few windows away, music. Sweet, gentle music.

It brought a smile to his face, thinly, half-listening to his best friend ramble about the facilities in his team and how he lucked out that he was under a pro-contract, just tuning to whatever music played. The more he listened, the more his mind went back to a time he was at the beach, head against someone’s shoulder, listening to the waves, but more so on to the tune of a guitar, and to her singing.

Ah, music.

So that’s what he was lacking.

There was music all around him wherever he goes.

Unsurprisingly, with the influx of people in Tokyo – he had to remind himself it was one of the biggest, if not, cities in the world – there would be some sort of culture clash. It was hard to get around at first, had he not had his older brother to guide him (and Hoshiumi) around.

Honestly, he got the hang of it.

Still, he prefers the quiet and sane Nagano mountains over the hustle and bustle that is Tokyo.

In the craziness that is now his new life, he found solace in music.

Thankfully, Tokyo has quite a lot of those, too.

He once found himself in a record shop, drawn entirely by the sight of vinyl records, even CDs, and the sound of music. Talking a step further in, it was though he could feel his feet sink into the sand, could feel the breeze through his scalp, the smell of saltwater.

Another step in, the faint sound of drums playing overhead. He could almost see a uniformed girl with blue-dyed hair slamming through, a smile on her face.

He might as well be in the heart of her being, seeing as he was surrounded by everything she loved.

Walking through the aisles, combing through albums, artists, his eyes then fell on the listening station at the far back.

Going back an aisle, he plucks the record and approaches a staff for assistance. Immediately, he was attended to, gently instructed how to use the turntable, before leaving him to his own devices, settling on his seat, headphones on.

Breathing a sigh, his fingers line the turntable, brown eyes marveling at the ancient wonder, then at the record he picked up. Recalling sometime back when a blue-haired girl would spend her time listening to it, surprising himself in the process when he saw the album cover but one time.

Still, the memory it serves, as he watched nigh hypnotical spin, music filling his ears, was enough to make him smile.

The distress of the chorus, the almost begging made his heartache.

As another song begins to play, he takes a picture of the store from his spot, then takes a selfie of himself with the record, then sends it to her.

Not long after, just before the chorus hits, his phone lights up, the corners of his lips quirk at the name.

Minutes later, he gets up, record in hand to place at the return bin before diving into the aisle, looking from his phone to the rows of albums. Then, brown eyes widen as long fingers carefully pluck an album of a person lying on the floor. He snaps a picture of the album before returning to his station, sliding his headphones on.

(When she received his text, her fingers quickly type a reply, her laptop was on with her music app on screen, a particular band with a specific album on display. Not long after she hit send, he replies. She glances at her screen, at a particular track number, then texts.)

Carefully, he slides the needle on track nine, then texts.

(Her finger hovers over the play button when she received his reply. Smiling, she hits play, telling him to do the same.)

He hits play .

And just like that, it’s as though he’s transported back into his room, with Pan lying in the corner, a girl with blue-dyed hair lying across him in his bed, and music.

Him.

Her.

Them.

And music.

They kept in touch.

But of course, they do.

Texts, calls, videocalls, they continue to keep up with each other’s lives.

A friendship that spun for years, teased by that one flickering unspoken attraction the two had for each other. It was almost an unspoken rule between the two, to never bring it up, to never delve into it, entertain it, to leave it as is.

It’s almost impossible to not think of the two just as it was impossible Hoshiumi Kourai ever being the silent type.

There was a fair share of embarrassment, mostly on his side when his older brother forcefully himself into one of their calls right after Hoshiumi inserted himself in one of their calls. Note to self: never take your video calls in the living room. Do it in your room.

Hirugami would like to think it was karma for all the times he pranked her back in high school, for all his mischief.

Getting a laugh out of her made up for it, though.

He could endure being at the butt of jokes, having their moment ruined by two of the worst roommates in Tokyo, so long as he got to see her smile like that. A smile that was just as pretty as he remembered, erasing that sad, broken, lost girl at the verge of losing it all.

Just the memory of her in that state, the aftermath of what happened, made him hate their distance much more. It what made him dread their graduation, hated how he was torn between achieving his dreams and being there for the one person he promised he’d be there for.

He would never say it out loud, but with every text, every call, every video call, every time he’d drop by the record store, every time he heard music, every time he saw a shade of blue, the words just found themselves lodged in his throat.

Burdened deeply by the neglect of her own mother, forced to have to depend on her wits to live by, Hirugami just didn’t want to add more to her list of burdens.

Even though she was still back in Nagano, she was making it work. Now living with her aunt, she was faring just as well as when she was with Myungim-san.

Every weekend, she still drops by Noetsu beach, mostly to visit the elderly couple who took her in.

More often than not, she plays with her fellow classmate-slash-bandmates, playing at gigs every other weekend. She makes sure to send him videos of the gigs she’s been in, each local event their band has participated.

She was living her best life, just as he was living his.

And yet, whenever they bade each other good night, after every call, the ache for the other burned. The yearning was there.

And yet.

And yet.

What can they do?

She was dating someone.

He was studying for an exam, they were having their nightly videocall when she said it. Rather abruptly.

His pen nearly slipped off his hand. Her (e/c) blinked at that, expression turning apprehensive.

“…really?” Fuck, did his voice shake? What the fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck!

Slowly, she nods, expression still there.

Something inside him shatters, his hands slowly shake, but he quickly balls them, quirking on his usual smile. “Tell me about him!”

This is okay, he tells himself.

This is okay, he repeats to himself.

This. Is. Okay.

After all, they were friends – best of friends, even! They had no other obligation to each other, regardless of the whatever they had. Friends looked after each other, took care of each other, shared songs.

Friends were like the stars to the moon, both sharing the night sky to shine down but leaving only the best one to shine brightest.

Friends were two halves of a whole, complementing each other in more ways than one.

Friends were there for each other, through thick and thin.

Friends.

Friends…

Friends …

Friends…sometimes look at the other, with shared yearning despite the miles, listen to the same music, laugh at the same joke, share secret smiles with other. That’s still what friends do, right?

He passed his exam, with a few mistakes.

Just two months later after she told him, they broke up.

(Late at night, makeup mussed and ruined, she has one song on replay with the volume on full blast.

The song plays over and over again.

All she can do is stare at her ceiling, the corners of her eyes burning before leaking to the sides.)

His first beer was given to him straight after the first semester ended, by his big brother no less!

Fukuro says it’s to celebrate, because at the same time, the Adlers were now entering off-season. Which is how Hirugami found himself at some restaurant holding the Adlers’ off-season celebration. Honestly, after a hectic and tumultuous semester, all he wanted was to go home and sleep.

Sleep the night away.

And maybe reel.

Fukuro, however, as though life came in the form of his older brother, had different plans. Giving his youngest brother a call, demanding that he come to the location he texted – accepting no ‘ifs’ or ‘buts’.

Even though he hasn’t told anyone, his brother just knew.

Figures, he’s an old man, Hirugami thought to himself, frowning at the can in his hand.

Somewhere, Hoshiumi was rattling on and on with some other player – he doesn’t know. Everyone around him were mingling, chatting, excitement over the break they’ve been waiting for since the season began, others have talked about training regimens they plan to take. Sheesh, what monsters.

Comfortable in his own little corner, Hirugami just takes everything in, a cold can of beer still in hand.

He hums to himself, lips twitching at each song that he hums.

Looking at the can in hand, the slight tilt he does to read the product name, causes some of the condensation to drip down to his shoes.

Sighing, he tips his head back, taking a sip.

Bitter , he thinks, forcing the amber liquid down his throat, smacking his mouth. It’s bitter.

(y/n): hey

(y/n): so, i made a song cover.

(y/n): truth is

(y/n): the whole time i listened to it over and over and over again

(y/n): all i thought of was you

(y/n): i cried listening to it

(y/n): and yet, it’s the song i made a cover of

(y/n): for reasons

(y/n): anyway

(y/n): hope you like it : )

(y/n): link

Right after she sent him that video, he couldn’t stop listening to it. It was on repeat for days and days to come.

His mind was consumed by nothing but her – the song choice, her singing, the lyrics, the emotion she poured into it.

Somewhere deep inside him, he felt something snap into place.

After listening to her cover for the nth time, life – in the form of his older brother yet again, shoved him his car keys to his face, winking in the process as he and Hoshiumi walked out their shared apartment.

Hirugami then snapped into action.

He came to one of her shows, driving all four hours from Tokyo to Nagano, then practically dashed all the way to the fourth floor, where her band was playing.

Under the fluorescent lights, she saw him.

Him and his beautiful face.

Suddenly, she poured more soul into her singing, pouring everything she's felt and wanted to say to him.

Did it reach him? she wondered.

When they met later that day, Hirugami was quick to pull her into a hug, close and tight, nosing into her hair, her feelings had reached him.

Without another word, he pressed his lips to hers - the same spark from that summer ago was there. It always was. It never died. It just burned, continued to burn, just waiting for it to be fanned and grow.

Grow and grow until cinders burst out into embers, burning brighter and brighter.

It was stupid how they acted just now.

He felt stupid.

She felt stupid.

They were stupid.

Hoshiumi was right, they were both stupid.