I’m a big proponent of vulnerability and the life work it takes to improve yourself so you can experience true love, joy, and belonging. I was introduced to Brene Brown only a year or so ago and it changed my life and how I viewed relationships with myself and those around me. In many ways, it saved me and my relationships.
I think with how some people use social media and become so dependent on it for validation (esp. in the era of the pandemic), Brene Brown’s research and lessons are even more important than ever.
I’ve included an email from Robert Glazer (from his Friday Forward series) on a relevant topic (body armor), below the cut.
Body Armor - 3/5/21
Each year, a few podcast episodes I listen to make a lasting impact. Like a good whisky or wine, these conversations also get better with age as I reflect back on the lessons and their applications in both life and business.
In the episode, Brown spoke with Ferriss about the concept of body armor, something that we create as a protection or defense mechanism in our lives or careers.
This figurative armor protects us from both real and perceived threats. Eventually, we see it is effective, wear it proudly and grow comfortable with the protection it provides.
Our body armor protects us from any number of things: mistakes, insecurity, shame, fear of failure, or regret.
However, we eventually grow to the point that we no longer need the protection this body armor provides. We become more adept at handling whatever we previously needed or wanted protection from, or we find that it’s just not relevant anymore for any number of reasons.
Very often, though, we fail to ditch the armor even after we no longer need it. It becomes an invisible weight that we carry around; it’s suddenly a burden, not an asset. Often, we don’t even realize that we are lugging around protection for a battle we’re no longer fighting.
Think about how exhausting it would be to carry around a heavy backpack with no practical use. Similarly, carrying around our unnecessary armor creates psychological fatigue. We need to be aware when our armor is no longer needed and make the conscious decision to remove it. Â
Recently, I was discussing a challenge I was facing with someone who has served as a coach and confidant to me over the past few years. Like any great coach, he listened carefully as I explained the circumstances, then challenged my assumptions and encouraged me to question the story I had been telling myself about this issue.
I reflected on his words over the next few days and realized he was right. This was a circumstance where I was likely lugging around unnecessary body armor that had served me very well for a long time, and probably contributed to past successes in similar situations, but it was no longer relevant or necessary. Â
It was time to ditch the armor. Â
Over time, we become adept at telling ourselves stories, without going back to challenge many of our underlying assumptions as we change and grow. The reality is that circumstances and situations change, and the armor that that helped in the last battle won’t serve the same purpose in the next one. Something that was an asset can easily become a liability when we fail to reflect on its usefulness over time. Â
Where in your life or career are you telling yourself a story that is no longer true? Where might you be still wearing armor that is needlessly weighing you down?
If you can answer that question, you might feel a lot lighter.
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Here's The Best Rule for Responding to a Heated Situation To Avoid Saying Something You Will Regret
Here’s The Best Rule for Responding to a Heated Situation To Avoid Saying Something You Will Regret
Source | LinkedIn | Robert Glazer
A few weeks ago, I was talking to a friend who coaches a youth soccer team and he shared a clever policy he has instituted with the parents of his players.
If parents have a complaint or issue they want to raise about the game, they need to wait 24 hours before emailing him about it.
It can feel cathartic to get something that is bothering us off our chest. But,…
How You Manage These 2 Kinds of Employees Will Define Your Company's Culture
How You Manage These 2 Kinds of Employees Will Define Your Company’s Culture
Source | LinkedIn | Robert Glazer | Entrepreneur, Best-Selling Author and Speaker | Founder & CEO @ Acceleration Partners
I learned one of the most valuable leadership lessons of my life when I was 23, when one of my first managers drew for me what he called the Nice versus Competent two-by-two matrix.
He shared that it’s obvious that businesses want as many nice/competent employees as possible,…
In the Pulitzer Prize-winning biographical book, Team of Rivals: The Political Genius of Abraham Lincoln, author and American historian, Doris Kearns Goodwin, tells the story of President Lincoln’s decision to fill his cabinet with political adversaries, namely the men who ran against him in the contentious 1860 election.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Some of our favorites, from Friday to Friday. Visit the Happenings Page for the full calendar of arts events in the Philadelphia region and beyond.
Friday, July 25, 5:30 – 10 pm – #OpeningsReceptions
At Arm’s Length + The Garden of Alternate Histories: Take a moment to resolve that persistent identity crisis with a double-exhibition at Paradigm. Lauren Rinaldi explores the self-portrait at arm’s length, challenging the curated caricature of the modern selfie with exposed, colorfully imperfect windows into self-worth. Remember when those Choose-Your-Own-Ending Goosebumps books finally gave you a false sense of security? Relive the thrill with an interactive video installation by Sarah Bereza and Fall on Your Sword, in which the viewer controls the piece. While you’re there, be sure to say hi to gallery co-founders and InLiquid members Sara McCorriston and Jason Chen of Juggling Wolf.
Paradigm Gallery & Studio, 803 S. Fourth Street, Philadelphia
Saturday, July 26, 1 – 2:30 pm – #Miscellaneous
Summer Special Walking Tours: From Coffeehouses to Banquet Halls: The Museum of Chinese in America challenges the foodie inside every arts lover with a walking tour of Chinatown in New York. Trace out the evolving history of the restaurant scene for a $15 cover.
Museum of Chinese in America, 215 Centre Street, NYC
Saturday, July 26, 2 pm – #Screenings
Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory: Chew on some Everlasting Gobstoppers – and some warm, gooshy nostalgia to boot – with a screening of the 1971 classic, Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory. The $5 admission offers you a golden ticket back to childhood.
International House Philadelphia, 3701 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia...
Some of our favorites, from Friday to Friday. Visit the Happenings Page for the full calendar of arts events in the Philadelphia region and beyond.
Saturday, July 19, 2 pm – #GalleryTalk
Nicholas Toth, The Last Helmet Maker: If under the sea represents your summer style, dive into the gallery talk for the current exhibition at Material Culture. Nicholas Toth carries on the work of his grandfather, a master craftsman of diving helmets, using the original process and materials from the 1800s – copper and brass and 320 hours of labor.
Material Culture, 4700 Wissahickon Avenue, Suite 101, Philadelphia
Saturday, July 19, 7 pm – #Screening
The Denizens of the Pines: It’s time for a sleepover with the Jersey Devil – if you dare. Gravy Studio & Gallery hosts a retreat in the Pine Barrens for a sneak peek into David Scott Kessler’s upcoming film Pines. $15 covers admission into the event, while an extra $10 guarantees a spot at a local campsite for the night.
Ashleigh homestead in Browns Mills, NJ
Sunday, July 20, 2 – 4 pm – #Fundraiser
Renewal: ARTsisters brings a combo workshop-fundraiser to Old City Jewish Art Center in support of Women’s Way. The $5 suggested donation goes towards supporting women’s rights advocacy and education, while the mixed media memoir workshop celebrates the value of friendship. Just the right amount of positive vibes to get you through the week....
