Originally I tried to reblog this onto this headcanon post here from @ferdinands-love-club , but desktop has been fighting me all night XD
So stag! I love you and your writing, but please stop stabbing me in the back by turning my little tags against me
Hubert liked to think he was a rational person. A very rational and logical person. One that did not let their emotions get in the way of anything.Ā
So why in the flames did he feel like this?
He had never felt like this before. It was like some sort of poison had dripped into his veins, ugly and treacherous as it crept towards his heart and squeezed. All for what, logically, would be a ridiculous reason! And pray tell, what was this reason?
The fact that Ferdinand seemed to be gaining admirers.Ā
Silly, wasnāt it? It wasnāt as though he held claim over the manās heart! It wasnāt as though he spent day after day and night after night at Ferdinandās side, drinking in his presence as Ferdinand did the same. It wasnāt as though Hubert went to sleep with Ferdinand beside him, his fiery hair left astray as he laid down to rest.
(But oh, how he longed for it. He would keep the desire locked up inside his heart until the day came when heād burn, but heād burn with his secrets all the same.)
Hubert thought it was beyond ridiculous, that he found jealousy of all things running through his body the moment he realized that Ferdinand was gaining admirers. It wasnāt as though he was even trying! He was simply doing was Lady Edelgard had instructed of him, and that was furthering their relations with the other nobles of the land.Ā
Though really - and Hubert would never say so aloud - you would have to be completely and utterly blind if you somehow didnāt manage to fall a little in love. Ferdinand was like an addiction, his sunlight like a blessing and a curse all the same. It brought light to your world, made it seem as though you were previously living in darkness; yet once you had it, you could never let go.
(And despite how Hubert knew he should let go, should go back to living in the darkness as he had always done, should allow Ferdinandās light to leave before he tainted that and the man who exuded it, he couldnāt help but hold onto it tightly.
Perhaps - no, he was being selfish, but he found that he just couldnāt go back.)
Yet here he was now. Stewing in feelings he should not be having, should not be allowed to have lest he ruin everything, as he watched Ferdinand laugh and spread his light amongst the nobles he was meant to charm in order to win their support. He truly was terrible, thinking of his own feelings over that of Ferdinand or even Lady Edelgard.
Perhaps Ferdinand did enjoy the attention he received from these new admirers of his. Perhaps, like Ferdinand had captured his heart all those years ago, someone had caught Ferdinandās. Perhaps Hubert was uselessly letting the jealously curl around his heart when heād really hadnāt had a chance no matter what he did.Ā
(Or perhaps, a tiny voice in the back of his mind spoke up, perhaps Ferdinand has only eyes for you. Perhaps heās only charming these nobles simply because he thinks he has no chance with you.
Hubert quickly quashed that voice.)
Hubertās feelings aside, he had a job to do. That job being to protect Lady Edelgard and those of the Black Eagle Strike Force. And that would include getting rid of or intimidating any unsavory individuals that got near them. Some of the nobles Ferdinand had to win the support of did seem to be of the unsavory kind. Perhaps he should have a discussion with Lady Edelgard about them.
(That tiny voice spoke up again, the tiny voice that sounded suspiciously like Ferdinand: āYou are letting your jealousy control you~ā it said, in an almost teasing manner.
Hubert ignored it. He was a rational, logical man. He did not let his emotions get in the way of his decision-making.)
