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Look, i don’t blame Tamlin for thinking Feyre was under mind controlling because, we know, Rhys is the most powerful High Lord in history. I blame Tamlin for assume she was under mind controlling. Bc he didn’t say “how i could be sure that you aren’t under mind controlling?”, he said “you are under mind controlling.” - like, if mind control was the only reason why she could ever left him. Like if she wasn’t drowning and dying before she left.
I don’t blame Tamlin for went after the supposedly love of his life, i blame Tamlin bc he made a deal with Amarantha’s boss to get Feyre back even knowing she sacrificed herself to stop Amarantha. - and, you know, bc it means he will help the king basically destroy her world.
I don’t blame Tamlin for not pushing Feyre to learn how to read in acotar, i blame Tamlin for not asking her to learn after the second task bc, you know, she and Lucien would be killed if wasn’t Rhys.
I don’t blame Tamlin for not being able to help with Feyre’s PTDS and depression (let’s be clear here, she was depressed), I blame Tamlin for not actually trying. He did ask her what she wants, but when she answered, he choose not to listen and did what he thought was best for her. She was drowning and he let her. He locked her. Tamlin probably even pretended he was sleeping just to not help her. (I really can discuss how much he loves her).
I can’t forgive him. I can’t stop hating him. She can, for her own mental health maybe. She probably will if Sarah writes a good redemption arc. But i won’t. Rhys won’t. Her family won’t. Her friends won’t.
And you wanna know how i know that? Because i do kind of forgave my psychological abuser father and his ex-wife, i kind of don’t hate them. But my husband won’t. My mother won’t (well, i don’t think she actually hate my father, but she doesn’t actually like him neither). Not because they are terrible people (which, actually, they are, but that’s not the main point here) but because they know how fucked up my head is. Because they know how hard is to me. Because my husband is right here when i cry like a crazy person because of a lot of crazy things that i know that aren’t really true, but i can’t stop feeling it.Â
Guys, i’m always on the laptop when i’m home. Like, i barely touch my cellphone/mobile when i’m home. Every single time that i close the laptop and grab my cellphone/mobile, i don’t need to wait five minutes to hear my husband asking what’s wrong. If i’m not on laptop, if i’m not on my cellphone/mobile, if i’m not talking and talking, all i need is like 70 seconds. Because he knows. He knows i’m not ok. He knows me. And Tamlin just pretend he was sleeping? Fuck him. No, really, fuck him.
So, if Sarah wanna a redemption arc, go ahead, i can understand if Feyre forgive him, i get it, i really get it. But i won’t.
