#faentaur

Representation, Symbols, The Riddle of the Shadow

I started writing an article on the Wyrms that Are Wise, but I found myself needing to start here, much as I started Antic Delights with these concepts. Early in my renewed, twenty-first century practice, I started setting up a shrine/altar, as one does. Now, some people have very particular definitions for shrine and altar, and they’ll argue—drawing on culture, lore, scholarship, and so…

Microcosms, Desiring Machines, Sex, Pressure

I did some simple med’n and relaxation last night. How I envision myself, how I feel about myself becomes just as important a part of the microcosm and the sphere of sensation as anything else I may put inside, that I may internalize. And for most people, the desiring machines and all that become demonic ideas and ego-aspects that seek to redefine us as negatives, as what we lack. Other people’s…

deG’s notes on the dark heart remind me of my anger issues and lets me remember I want to express my anger far more assertively and calmly (rage is not the answer—rage is me not expressing my feelings to the point that they explode. And I was taught never to express feelings others might find an imposition. But I should not cast away my anger—anger tells me when I have been wronged, or when I…

The skies are where I want to rise to, to climb Elethis into the skies. But the land also calls to me,—I want to explore them both, touch and hug the tress, soar through the clouds, walk the land to the sea—and I would even touch the waters, drink and swim. Hmm. I still feel fear and trepidation about the waters. If the blue sky elthil comes from above/Sky, and the Green from the Land, then what…

I’m reminded again how easily the mind can switch levels of perception—I’m out walking and—I’m channeling and aligning, and—click—K is there beside me vividly, and it’s almost actual. But—click—I paid too much attention of the—no, of a different kind, and it fell away like gossamer. The normal perception, conperception layers here are very persistent and habitual. But that click—part of it…

I rited and med’d last night briefly, but I also discovered while doing ___ my giddy joy at not just culture jamming but weird little “faerie tricks” as ____ and _______ put it. Not malicious so much as weird, confusing, generating noise—midnight blue trigrams on black with nursery rhymes and people’s names on the other side, mailed to random locations. It’s like information and paradigm jamming,…

How do I call weird shit into my life? Previously, I think I just did, and within days or weeks, without expecting it, weird shit would start to occur. K notes it’s not hard to get the attention of the Otherworlds, and most people want it to go back away. Doing the Otherworldly, calling the ôl-vala into yourself, immersing yourself in that power and making it “your own”—I suspect you get that…

It’s a nice morning, but I want more clouds. Illness tends to magnify the body and the most basic needs and senses. Accordingly, people who can’t get treated have a harder time. I can call down Faentaur, and that helps, and I can imagine were I still smoking. My head feels congested, and that slows the breathing—for oxygen and elthil. But faentaur in the sun always feels good— —illness throws one…