My sister wanted to watch Miracle on 34th Street (the 1994 one) and I don't think I've watched it since I stopped being Mormon and there are (what I personally find to be) uncomfy undertones that believing in Santa = believing in God/jesus. π
There's also this air of self-righteousness from the male love interest in the movie. I know I'm a lesbian who dislikes most male love interests in movies anyway because bad writing, but he bugs me so bad. The way he asked if they could pray over the dinner they were having in her house, where he has to know they aren't religious because of his relationship with her, gave me major patriarchal Mormon man vibes.
And the whole "if you can't let yourself believe in something like Santa Claus then how can you have faith in anything?" Booooo, false equivalencies. π
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Random ask to get to know you better lol: do you like to drink? And if you do, what's your go to drink?
I have actually never drank. I grew up in a religion that forbade alcohol so I just never have. Now that I am finally physically leaving that religion (Iβve been mentally out for awhile) I have thought about drinking, but it still feels illegal almost. Itβs weird I know.
However, I feel like I would really like wine. I feel like it would be the alcohol the tastes the best. Idk how accurate that is but I think for my first drink it will probably be some type of wine.
Was not prepared for the emotionally visceral reaction listening to David Archuleta talk about his mom would give me. These days most stuff about the church just rolls off me because I'm legitimately over it and I don't care but MAN. Wombo combo mommy issues and religious trauma and you have a recipe for disaster I suppose π«
Wistful queer exmo rambling under the cut because I gotta get it out somewhere.
Like! His mom just leaves the church because she loves him more than anything the church tells her or could say and it's hard not to draw the conclusion that mine doesn't because if anything, she's doubled down in some ways on Mormonism since three of her kids have left and one of them turned out to be a gender fucky dyke.
And I don't want to sound bitter or ungrateful because I wasn't even expecting her to take my coming out as well as she did, and that was a miracle in and of itself to me and I am so thankful for it; but she is still so Mormon that she believes someday when we're all resurrected this "burden" of being queer will be "lifted" from me. Being queer has never been a burden for me. The church and how it treats people like me and rips apart families as a result of that is the burden. She doesn't quite understand that, even though my sister and I have tried explaining. I don't know if it's because she just doesn't get it yet or if she is choosing not to get it.
Hearing how someone else's Mormon mom just so immediately heard how her child didn't feel welcomed in her church and that was enough for her to say "I'm done" so she left and mine has heard how I feel over and over and over again and hasn't left hurts more than I anticipated.
And I wanna be clear I'm not angry or upset with David or his mom. I'm so happy for them that they have that relationship and that he has her in his corner. It just kinda makes me sad a little bit.
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This is hyper specific but my sister is watching real housewives of SLC and the really angry exmo inside my brain is popping out but the ONLY REASON Lisa Barlow, who is on TV breaking every single rule in Mormonism to have ever existed, is allowed to continue being Mormon and hasn't been excommunicated like Heather Gay is because Lisa has money and they don't want to lose it
