#engvall

Life in the Lands Between is not easy, and Engvall knows this all too well. Despite choosing to protect a lordless castle for the rest of his days, his first priority is protecting you. Even if you’re just going to collect herbs or take a bath in the stream, Engvall insists on accompanying you everywhere. And, um, you can’t exactly argue with an over 6 foot tall knight  XD

You and Engvall share a large room in the castle he chose to protect. He himself doesn’t mind sleeping on a hard bed or on the floor, but since you sleep with him every night, he would not let you rest until he found the best blankets available. Your comfort is very important to him, and it helps him rest better at night. 

Speaking of sleeping. This man is always cuddled into you or touching you in some way. I imagine the emotional toll of being banished is pretty tough, and Engvall appreciates that you’re always there for him. Whether it’s an arm around your waist, him spooning you tightly against his chest, or your arm and leg lazily flung over his body, he always wants some sort of contact with you when you both are asleep. He is always the big spoon, just bc of how large he is, and he enjoys protecting you even in his sleep. Given how tall he is, he gives off a ton of body heat, and you wake up pretty sweaty in the mornings

Sorry, but Engvall cannot cook very well. He can cook well enough to survive while traveling or just to get by, but it is by no means a 5-star meal. he burns most of his food. He avoids embarrassment by saying he prefers his food to be “crispy”. He has trained his whole life with his halberd and armor, not with pots and pans. Engvall loves it when you cook for him! He will sit patiently and watch you cook like you're the only thing that matters in the world. He’s usually very hungry since his daily activities expend a lot of calories, so be prepared to cook at least three plates for him to be full. But with how lovingly he watches you cook, you wouldn’t mind making food for him all day

Touching again on the protectiveness. He’s extremely overprotective, and a little possessive. If he sees someone else in the castle looking at you for too long or flirting with you, this man will stalk up silently behind you and just death stare at the person trying to get with you. His presence is enough to make anyone fold, so it’s always successful. Once you turn around after the person you were talking to runs away in fear, he instantly becomes your Engvall again, just with a slightly deadly twinkle in his eye

He needs a decent amount of reassurance, especially if he finds out someone was hitting on you. Engvall has little to no money of his own despite his title, and your living means are in no way comfortable. He’s scared you’ll leave him for someone who has more money and resources to give you a better life. But you always tell him that you don’t care about money or status or material things, you just want him, and that he’s the best partner anyone could ask for

Engvall loves it when you help him into his armor. I don’t even think it would be possible for him to put on all that armor by himself. He loves watching the way your fingers glide over the metal and buckle everything in place, and how your eyebrows furrow if something gets stuck. He looks at you so love-sickeningly that it makes your heart flutter. Engvall will track you down in the castle to ask you to help him into his armor even though there are tons of other people around who could easily do so. He says that you put on his armor just the way he likes <3

Engvall really does not want you to become elden lord. The path to doing so is riddled with death and despair, and he would be destroyed if something happened to you. If you want to be the elden lord, he will try to dissuade you at every chance he can get. If you end up setting out traveling the Lands Between to become elden lord, he will be with you every step of the way to ensure nothing happens to you at this rate, he might just become elden lord bc he doesn’t want you to fight anyone)

Engvall is pretty quiet even when alone with you, but you are his peace. When he is silent during his duties, it is because he has to maintain a watchful, cautious eye at all times. But when he’s quiet with you, wrapped up in a blanket in front of the fire and playing with your hair, he’s quiet because his love has no need for words. He will tell you he loves you sometimes, it is just hard for him to voice it. As a knight, he's a man of actions, not words. the only words he really ever had to say was his oath when he was sworn

Ever since your parents told you about this new suitor, lavish gifts were sent to you from the Lands Between at regular intervals. Fine cheeses and wines, dresses, jewels, rare books, and more. Each package was hand-signed by your suitor, and your mother insists on you opening each and every package in front of her.

“Oh, what’s next!?” Alessia asks with her hands clasped together in excitement. She stands behind you as you sit at a large table in the family dining area. Engvall stands by the doorway with his back to you, but somehow, you feel like his eyes are on you. 

You apathetically open the next gift, which is a beautiful golden crystal necklace. Despite your hatred for your new suitor, you cannot deny it is a lofty gift. 

“How beautiful!” your mother exclaims as she admires the jewel from over your shoulder. “I must show your father this!” Alessia snatches the necklace from your hands and dashes out of the dining room, leaving you and Engvall alone.

Engvall turns to face you when he hears you sigh. You put your head in your hands and take deep breaths.

“I’ve had enough of this,” you say quietly as you loudly scoot the chair across the stone floor to stand up. You jog down the hallway and out into the courtyard, hoping to have left the vicinity before your mother comes back. Engvall is right on your heels, but he’s so tall that your jog is barely a fast walk for him.

You burst out into the courtyard and make your way to your garden. There is a garden for each of your family members, where only their favorite flowers were planted. Your garden is a little further out than the others, shielded by tall oak trees and trimmed rose bushes. You open the iron gate and give Engvall room to enter before shutting it behind him. He looks at you silently before turning around to guard the gate.

“Engvall,” you sigh, but cannot help but let out a tiny laugh. His shoulders tense. “We’re just in the garden. You don’t have to stand guard here.”

“I must stand guard everywhere, my lady,” Engvall says as he scans the courtyard. Your family is all inside, and the only people who occasionally pass by are the gardeners. 

“Don’t you think it’s a little weird that we all have a knight at all times?” you ask, standing right behind Engvall. “It’s like my parents are almost expecting something horrible to happen.”

“My lady, you are a noble. There are many people who begrudge you that,” Engvall responds plainly. You sigh.

“Well, for once, would you please just enjoy the garden with me? I don’t think anything bad is going to happen right now. If we’re invaded or anything, the archers at the edge of the property will take care of it,” you attempt to convince him.

Engvall makes no move, and instead stands at his post. You grow annoyed.

“Engvall, did you hear me?” you ask with a huff, knowing full well that he heard you.

“I swore an oath to protect you, my lady,” Engvall responds. 

You finally give up, and turn to retreat further into your garden. There is a three-tiered fountain in the middle, and the sound of the water always calms your heart. There are four wrought-iron benches at each compass direction surrounding the fountain. The oak trees from outside your garden extend over the benches and fountain, ensuring that there is always cool shade to retreat to during the hot days. There is a cobblestone pathway that leads to a small clearing that houses all your favorite flowers, but that is not where you want to go today. When you were younger, with the help of Engvall, you cut some of the hedges to make a small opening into a secret part of your garden. You made Engvall and the gardeners swear to keep it a secret from everyone else. 

You turn back to Engvall and stare into the back of his head, hoping that he could read your mind that way. But that helmet must do more than protect his head, because whatever signals you were trying to send didn’t reach him. You turn on your heel and move aside the vines you have covering the small doorway to your secret garden. You duck a little and make your way through the space in the hedges, but Engvall’s voice makes you stop.

“My lady, I cannot see you if you go over there,” he calls from the gate. “Please come back.”

You smile mischievously to yourself. “You better come find me then,” you call as you retreat down the makeshift tunnel. You don’t make it far before you hear the clink of Engvall’s armor, and see a patch of sunlight as he moves the vines out of the way. You laugh as you exit the tunnel and come out into the small, grassy clearing of your secret garden. You asked the gardeners to train the rose bushes to grow into a roof to cover the clearing, and after years of training, the roses have formed a thick covering over your hideaway. Some sunlight peeks through the spaces in the thorny bushes, but most is blocked out. You remember the time you and Engvall got caught in the garden in a rainstorm, but you were barely wet because of how thick the covering was. 

The space is tall enough for you to stand, and with room for about five people to lay down. You’re lost in your own reverie, remembering all the times you snuck off here and made Engvall chase you, when the sound of his armor clinking brings you back to reality. Engvall squeezes through the entryway and stands up as straight as he can without being hit by the thorns.

“I see you made it,” you say with a smile as you look up at Engvall. But upon closer inspection, you can see that there are some branches clinging to the divots in his armor. “You’re so clumsy,” you joke. “You’re a mess.”

Engvall stands still as you gently pull off the twigs that got stuck in his armor. 

“Thank you, my lady,” he says quietly once you pull off the last twig. You thought you should respond, but silence overcomes you as you look at Engvall. Being back here, with him, brought back so many memories that left you speechless. This hideaway might as well be another dimension. The first time you saw Engvall’s face, the first time you asked him to hold your hand, was here. It was as if this hideaway allowed you to see Engvall as a human rather than your knight in shining armor. You blush and look away.  

Engvall says nothing, but his eyes never leave yours.

“I wish we could just stay here forever,” you say quietly. You look down at your hands and play with your nails.

“Where is my daughter?” you hear your mother’s voice call from the courtyard. You tense up.

“I am not sure, ma’am,” one of the gardeners says. “I haven’t seen her.”

You can hear your mother’s heels clicking against the stone courtyard as she looks for you. You wait with bated breath until you can no longer hear her shoes, or her voice calling for you. 

You take a deep breath. “That was close,” you say aloud. You sit down on the cool grass, and pat the space next to you with your hand. Engvall obeys, and lowers himself down slowly to not make much noise with his armor. You sit criss-crossed next to him, while his legs are bent out over the grass with his arms leaning against his thighs. There is not enough room for him to sit comfortably, especially in his armor. 

You look up at him sheepishly before nuzzling into his side and wrapping your hands around his arm. You can’t see it from under his helmet, but his eyes close in satisfaction as he lets out a small sigh. His metal armor is cold and hard against your cheek, but you don’t mind. You absentmindedly trace the small patterns in one of his gauntlets with your index finger. 

You eventually close your eyes and relax into his side. You begin to fall into a very light sleep; Engvall’s breathing was like a lullaby. The sound of his armor gently clinking makes you open your eyes to see that he is slowly moving his other hand towards your own. But his hand freezes in midair once your eyes are open. You look up at him and nod, and his hand gently encases both of yours. Despite the leather of the gauntlet covering his hand, you can feel the warmth of his skin against yours. He gently grabs your hands and holds them tight.

Engvall barely whispers your name. 

You blink your eyes open and look up at him again with a smile. “You said my name,” you say quietly. But when he doesn’t respond, you grow worried. “What is it?” you ask, your smile quickly fading.

Engvall purses his lips, battling his own mind. “We…we can’t…” he stammers slowly. Despite his words, his hand still holds your own.

“No one needs to know,” you implore as you sit up a little straighter. “What happens between me and my knight, stays between me and my knight.” 

But Engvall doesn’t seem very convinced, as his grip on your hands loosens slightly.

“Please, Engvall,” you say above a whisper this time. “What we’re doing isn’t wrong.”

Engvall looks away from you. “I…I swore an oath. To protect you.”

“And that’s what you’re doing, is it not?” you ask, still holding onto his strong arm. “Nothing has come in between your duty.”

“It…isn’t right,” he says. His voice is strained, and you can feel his muscles tense underneath your hand. His hand that was holding your own retreats to his side. 

“Engvall, please,” you say with a frown. You grab his arm a little tighter, hoping to keep him with you. But he gently escapes your grasp and stands up. 

“I need to resume my guard. I will be right on the other end of the tunnel,” he says before retreating. You’re left alone in your hideaway. It feels like Engvall took all the sunlight and warmth with him, as this place no longer brought you comfort in the moment. You place your head in your hands and cry.

…

The next week, you could barely manage to get a word in with Engvall. Ever since he let his guard down in the secret garden, he had been very distant with you: only speaking to you when necessary, avoiding being alone with you, and barely even looking at you. You tried to get him out of whatever shell he put himself in, but it was no use. No matter how many plates of food you saved him, how much you looked up at him adoringly, or how many times you held onto his arm, he did not budge. 

It didn’t help that the castle had been even busier as your parents got ready for the ball they are planning for your new suitor. Extra maids had been hired to clean every inch of the castle, rugs were being washed, windows shined, display armor polished, your clothes improved. And as you walked in silence through the halls of your family’s castle, Engvall was right there behind you, just as silent. 

Until today. Today, you had enough.

The rain petters against the stained glass windows in the corridors and causes a chill to settle over the castle. All the maids have extra furs and cloaks on, including you, but Engvall remains in his armor as always.

You walk towards the greenhouse when you suddenly turn on your heel and face Engvall. He instantly stands still and looks at you, but just above your head. You look up at him with a mixture of defiance and love.

“Aren’t you cold?” you ask him as you pull your furs around yourself. “That armor has got to be freezing.”

You can see Engvall slowly blink through his helmet. “I am all right, my lady. Do not concern yourself with me.”

Your brows furrow in frustration for a moment before you inch forward and run your fingers along his gauntlet. You were right: his armor is freezing, and slightly damp from the humidity. 

“Engvall!” you exclaim, and he almost jumps. “You need to get out of this armor and put on something warm. You’re going to get sick.”

“My lady, I must stay in my armor. I am not cold,” he insists.

You shake your head, and take off one of the layers of fur that lay around your shoulders. You walk behind Engvall and are about to place the fur over his shoulders when he turns around abruptly.

“My lady, please, you’re the one who’s going to get sick if you don’t keep that on you,” Engvall says.

You begin to get even more frustrated. “Engvall, I don’t want to play the knight card. But you’re my knight, and I insist that you wear this fur.” You hold out the fur towards him.

Engvall shakes his head. “My lady, I am allowed to forgo your orders when they are in direct opposition with your best interest. I cannot take the fur from you. Please, wear it.” Engvall then gently takes the fur from your hands and drapes it around your shoulders again. You sigh in defeat, but then look up at him angrily.

“What’s with you, Engvall?” you ask. “You’ve been different lately. I know why, but there’s no reason to be like this. Please, Engvall. I miss you. You’re my knight, and my friend, and…” your voice dies off in silence as you look at the freshly washed rug below you.

Engvall almost feels his heart breaking at your saddened expression. He leans down slightly, and whispers, “not here, my lady.”

You don’t realize that you’re having this conversation with Engvall in the middle of a corridor with various outlets to it. But before you can take back anything you said, your little sister comes running around from a side corridor, laughing. Right behind her is her knight Oleg, who is chasing after her.

“Hide me, sister!” she yells as she pretends to hide behind your legs. Oleg stops dead in his tracks and bows slightly to you. 

“What’s going on?” you ask as you look between Oleg and Malarue, who now clings onto your leg.

“I was playing hide and seek with Oleg, and he found me! But he was cheating!” she says with a smile.

“Cheating?” You say as you raise your eyebrow and look at Oleg with a smile of your own. “I don’t think an honorable knight would cheat.”

“He did!” Malarue says as she grabs your leg tighter.

You look at Oleg with mock judgment. “And what do you have to say in your defense, knight Oleg?”

“I assure you, lady, that I was not cheating,” Oleg says honorably. “Malarue was very loud when she hid in the storage room.”

You look down at Malarue. “You shouldn’t accuse people of cheating, sister. You lost, fair and square.”

Malarue frowns and runs back to Oleg. “It’s Oleg’s turn to hide now!” she says. 

“I cannot hide from you, my lady,” Oleg says to Malarue. “But you can hide again, if you wish.”

Malarue then takes off down another corridor. Oleg nods at you before slowly following after her. The moment to talk with Engvall is gone. You sigh and make your way back to the greenhouse. 

…

You sit on the couch that looks out over the gardens in your room, the moon now at its third quarter phase. Engvall is on his hour-long watch outside your door. You tried to distract yourself with reading, humming, anything, but your thoughts don’t stray from your knight just a few paces away. With a huff of determination, you sit up and go to your door.

“Engvall?” you say quietly as you open the door.

“Yes, my lady?” he replies dutifully.

“I want you to come inside,” you say plainly. 

Engvall hesitates. “I must watch your door, my lady.”

“Well, if anyone decides to break in, you’ll still be in here,” you say.

There is a minute of silence where you swear you can hear the cogs in Engvall’s head turning. Right as you are about to close the door and wish him goodnight, he turns and enters your bedroom. He stands right by the door, facing you, but still on guard.

“At ease, or whatever it is they say,” you say quietly.

He does not respond, nor move. You can feel your resolve failing.

“Please, Engvall,” you plead. “Please. I need you back.”

And Engvall finally sighs. A sign of humanity. Your eyes light up.

“Please, put your halberd down. Take off your helmet,” you ask. 

Engvall quietly steps into your room and does as you asked. He then stands before you, no halberd or helmet. And he finally looks at you again. He looks human: not a knight (despite the rest of his armor that’s still on him), not your protector. Now, he’s your Engvall.

You smile, but find that your knees can no longer hold you up. The crushing weight of never having your Engvall back again was too much to bear, and you only noticed the weight once it was gone. You kneel gently onto the floor, and Engvall is right there with you. He kneels before you, but does not move to touch you.

“I thought I lost you,” you say as you cry quietly. “Don’t do that to me, Engvall. Please, not again.”

This wasn’t the first time Engvall had distanced himself after you and him had a close moment. You never knew how long the episodes would last. Some lasted a few days, others weeks. 

You look up at him with tear-stained eyes, but before you can say or do anything else, he envelopes you in a tight hug. It hurts, with his armor digging into you through your furs. But you don’t care: Engvall is hugging you.

“I didn’t mean to worry you,” he whispers into your ear as you hug him back. You cling onto him like a moth to a flame. 

“Well, you did,” you retort. “Don’t do that again. You know I hate it when you do that.”

Engvall doesn’t respond. He instead opts to rub soft circles into your back. You take a deep breath and lean back to look at him, and the look in his eyes takes you away. He looks at you so much more than a knight looks at his charge. His green eyes are stunning, and take your breath away. Your lips part slightly, and the way his eyes dart to your lips doesn’t escape your notice. His cheeks blush slightly, embarrassed that the allure of your lips was too strong for him to resist. You look up at him adoringly, and whisper his name. His eyes flutter closed. You gently brush the tip of your nose against his, testing the waters. His eyes shoot open, but there is a hint of a small smile on his lips. You look back down at his lips, and then his eyes, before slowly closing the distance between you.

The kiss was gentle, but his arms around you hold you tight so that there is no hope of getting away. Not that you would want to. Desperate for more of him, you kiss him back just a little stronger, and you suddenly feel his large hand on the back of your head, pushing you impossibly closer to him. You mumble when you need air, and he lets you go, scanning your face for any signs of discomfort. But you smile up at him, your cheeks flushed and lips red. He dives in for a second kiss, and you gladly indulge him. Your moment went no further once you separated from him again. Engvall presses a chaste kiss on your cheek, his stubble grazing your soft skin. His warm breath tickles your ear, and you can’t help but giggle quietly.

“Something funny?” he teases with a gentle smirk.

“Yeah. Your breath tickles.”

You awake to the sound of Engvall knocking on your wooden door.

“My lady,” he calls quietly through the door. “I’m sorry to disturb your rest, but it is time for you to wake up. I am not sure where Lyra is, but your parents are requesting your presence in their office.”

You groan and rub your eyes.

“Today would be a good day to run away, wouldn’t it?” you half-joke.

There is a moment of silence. “Please do not say such things, my lady,” Engvall pleads. “I was tasked to have you in your parents’ presence within the hour.”

You sigh and get out of bed. “Fine, fine. But since Lyra isn’t here to help me get dressed, they can’t expect me to look perfect.”

Engvall doesn’t respond, and instead continues to steadfastly guard the door to your bedroom. He steps aside in time when you open the door and step out in your comfortable, yet clearly noble, daily outfit. Despite your day already being ruined by your parents, you smile up at Engvall.

“Did you enjoy your dinner?” you whisper. Your neck cranes just to look at him. But his eyes are always covered by that helmet of his.

Engvall clears his throat. “We should not keep your parents waiting, my lady,” Engvall reminds you. 

You look down at the floor, saddened by his evasion. You turn and walk towards the office with Engvall in tow, and you hear him whisper, “Yes, my lady.”

You stop in your tracks as a huge smile adorns your face. You turn halfway back to him to say something else, but decide against it and continue your walk to your parents’ office. Engvall follows in silence, but the clinking of his metal armor always gives him away.

“I will remain here,” Engvall says as he opens the door of your parents’ office for you.

“Thank you, my knight,” you say coyly, but somehow innocently, to him. But if your little remark had any effect on him, it was lost to you because of that accursed helmet. You braced yourself as Engvall shut the door behind you.

“Sit,” your father utters. But despite his one-word order, it was spoken softly, something that surprised you.

You sit on a red velvet chair next to a bookcase that reaches to the ceiling. Your parents are seated in more lofty chairs across from you, with a wine glass each in their hands. 

“We wanted to tell you how pleased we are that you are getting along better with Vulen,” your mother says as she takes a sip of her wine. “We have worked hard to forge a connection between this family and his.”

There is a moment of silence, and you can feel your breath halt in your lungs.

“But we wanted to tell you that there is another suitor who has taken an interest in you,” your father continues where your mother left off. “He is an older man, but he is very wise, and rules over an expanse of land larger than Vulen’s family has, or any of the other nobles in this land.”

You can see your mother smiling to herself. Your heart sinks in your chest as you realize you are nothing but a pawn to these people who brought you into the world.

Your father drinks the rest of his wine, and a servant that was standing in the corner quickly refills it. He begins to speak again, “You have met him a few times, though I am not sure if you remember him. He hails from the Lands Between.”

Your heart stops in your chest for a moment. The Lands Between? That’s an ocean away!

“You would be more than a noble, my dear,” your mother chimes in. “You would be the duchess of a large swatch of land, with a castle, forts, knights, and all the abundance you could ever hope for.”

Your father is still smiling. Neither of your parents sense your discomfort, even as your muscles tense and you sink back into the chair.

“We have arranged for him to come in a months’ time, just before the harvest,” your mother says with the widest smile you have ever seen on her face. “You have made an impression on him during the few times he has met you. He says you are the truest beauty he has ever seen. I hate to ruin our connection with Vulen’s family, but this is simply an opportunity that we cannot pass up. To think of all the trades it could open up, not to mention our family ascending to more power than we could ever have hoped for!”

Your parents stand up happily and hug each other, almost in tears. You blink and try to will your existence away.

“What is his name?” you ask with a meek voice. Your throat feels dry.

“You don’t remember?” your father asks. You shake your head. “I’ll let him reintroduce himself then. He understands that you may not remember him, given how he has only met you a few times.” 

Your parents turn to you with wide smiles and twinkling eyes. “You have made us proud, daughter,” your father says. “We are making preparations for another ball, to be bigger than the last. We are having a new dress made for you as well. Please, rest up until the ball. You are dismissed.”

But you find that you cannot move. Your muscles will not move. You stare blankly up at your parents, and feel as though reality is disappearing around you.

“I know how you feel,” your mother says as she envelopes you in a hug. “This is the best thing that has ever happened to you! Don’t be overwhelmed. We know this man will be the best of husbands to you.”

Your mother then turns you towards the door and guides you out into the hallway, your legs reluctantly taking each step. She smiles before shutting the door once again, and you’re left in the hallway with Engvall.

“Are you all right, my lady?” Engvall asks. All the blood has gone from your face. You ground yourself in reality and look frantically up at him. His armor clinks as he tenses at your horrified face. 

“I…” you croak. “Don’t -”

“My lady!” Engvall exclaims as you faint. His strong arms keep you from falling, and he rushes you back to your room as he calls for one of your other maids. 

…

It is night when you awaken again, and the light of the full moon streams through your opened bedroom windows. When your vision refocuses, you can see that Engvall is inside your room this time, not outside, and is staring right at you from where he stands at your door.

“How are you feeling, my lady?” he asks from his post.

“I told you, none of the ‘my lady’ when we’re alone,” you snap, angered by the headache that pounds in your skull.

“One of the other maids was tending to you since you’ve fainted,” Engvall said. “I was told to watch over you until you awoke.”

You sit up in your bed and don’t notice the cold rag that was placed on your forehead until it fell in your lap. But before you could even pick it up to place it on your nightstand, Engvall grabbed it gently and set it back in a bowl of water. He stood almost anxiously at your bedside.

“Engvall,” you whisper with your head in your hands. 

“I’m right here,” he says gently. 

“They…want me to marry someone in the Lands Between. Not Vulen. They want me to live over there…” you say as you begin to cry. “I…I can’t leave this land! It’s my home!”

Engvall leans his halberd against your bedroom wall before kneeling down by your bed. You hear the clinking of metal, and when you look up, you see that Engvall has taken off his helmet and tucked it into his side. Your breath catches in your throat. Every time you see Engvall’s face, it’s like the first time. His face is slightly chiseled, but still soft enough so that he’s not too scary. His short, dark hair sits shaggily on his head from being compressed by his helmet all the time, but you find it endearing. His lips are in a slight frown, and his brows are furrowed. 

“What can I do to help you?” he asks quietly. 

You blink away more tears. “You already know.”

Engvall sighs gently. “I cannot advise you to run away.”

You sniffle and wipe your nose with your sleeve. If it was anyone else standing in front of you, you’d be embarrassed, but Engvall has seen every unattractive thing about you and always looked at you the same way.

You look back at him with wide eyes, silently pleading for him to take you away. Away from your parents, from Vulen, from whoever this new suitor is. Just away from here.

The atmosphere is slightly tense as you watch Engvall set his helmet on the ground and slowly take off one of his gauntlets. He moves the buckles slowly to produce as little sound as possible. Once the gauntlet is off, he places it gently on the floor, and his hand outstretches painfully slowly towards your face. His eyes are locked onto yours, scanning your face for any sign of discomfort. But you are almost limp as Engvall’s hand hovers in midair, giving you time to lean away if you want, before his calloused palm makes contact with your cheek. His thumb gently wipes at the tears on your cheek, and he uses the back of his hand to wipe the tears from the other. You lean into his touch with closed eyes and parted lips, and it captivates him. 

You reach up to grab his hand when you feel it slowly pulling away, and you hold his strong arm with both of your hands as you nuzzle your cheek into his palm. Engvall is silent, his face unreadable, but his thumb slowly caresses your cheek.

“I will follow you anywhere, y/n,” Engvall whispers. “If you want to run away, I’ll be with you. Anywhere.”

You smile gently, his large palm still against your cheek, and your eyes gleam in the moonlight as they meet his own. 

“Promise?” you say quietly.

You and Engvall share a large room in the castle he chose to protect. He himself doesn’t mind sleeping on a hard bed or on the floor, but since you sleep with him every night, he would not let you rest until he found the best blankets available. Your comfort is very important to him, and it helps him rest better at night. 

Speaking of sleeping. This man is always cuddled into you or touching you in some way. I imagine the emotional toll of being banished is pretty tough, and Engvall appreciates that you’re always there for him. Whether it’s an arm around your waist, him spooning you tightly against his chest, or your arm and leg lazily flung over his body, he always wants some sort of contact with you when you both are asleep. He is always the big spoon, just bc of how large he is, and he enjoys protecting you even in his sleep. Given how tall he is, he gives off a ton of body heat, and you wake up pretty sweaty in the mornings

Sorry, but Engvall cannot cook very well. He can cook well enough to survive while traveling or just to get by, but it is by no means a 5-star meal. he burns most of his food. He avoids embarrassment by saying he prefers his food to be “crispy”. He has trained his whole life with his halberd and armor, not with pots and pans. Engvall loves it when you cook for him! He will sit patiently and watch you cook like you're the only thing that matters in the world. He’s usually very hungry since his daily activities expend a lot of calories, so be prepared to cook at least three plates for him to be full. But with how lovingly he watches you cook, you wouldn’t mind making food for him all day

Touching again on the protectiveness. He’s extremely overprotective, and a little possessive. If he sees someone else in the castle looking at you for too long or flirting with you, this man will stalk up silently behind you and just death stare at the person trying to get with you. His presence is enough to make anyone fold, so it’s always successful. Once you turn around after the person you were talking to runs away in fear, he instantly becomes your Engvall again, just with a slightly deadly twinkle in his eye

He needs a decent amount of reassurance, especially if he finds out someone was hitting on you. Engvall has little to no money of his own despite his title, and your living means are in no way comfortable. He’s scared you’ll leave him for someone who has more money and resources to give you a better life. But you always tell him that you don’t care about money or status or material things, you just want him, and that he’s the best partner anyone could ask for

Engvall loves it when you help him into his armor. I don’t even think it would be possible for him to put on all that armor by himself. He loves watching the way your fingers glide over the metal and buckle everything in place, and how your eyebrows furrow if something gets stuck. He looks at you so love-sickeningly that it makes your heart flutter. Engvall will track you down in the castle to ask you to help him into his armor even though there are tons of other people around who could easily do so. He says that you put on his armor just the way he likes <3

Engvall really does not want you to become elden lord. The path to doing so is riddled with death and despair, and he would be destroyed if something happened to you. If you want to be the elden lord, he will try to dissuade you at every chance he can get. If you end up setting out traveling the Lands Between to become elden lord, he will be with you every step of the way to ensure nothing happens to you at this rate, he might just become elden lord bc he doesn’t want you to fight anyone)

Engvall is pretty quiet even when alone with you, but you are his peace. When he is silent during his duties, it is because he has to maintain a watchful, cautious eye at all times. But when he’s quiet with you, wrapped up in a blanket in front of the fire and playing with your hair, he’s quiet because his love has no need for words. He will tell you he loves you sometimes, it is just hard for him to voice it. As a knight, he's a man of actions, not words. the only words he really ever had to say was his oath when he was sworn