#drepression

Your body feels like dead weight as you slump down onto your bed. Before your face even hits the pillows, you can feel the tears welling up in your eyes. Today was the worst day you’ve had in a really long time.

It wasn’t like you weren’t good at your job, but it was just one of those days where you felt like you couldn’t do anything right. No matter how hard you tried, everything seemed to fall apart. Not to mention your boss and his aggressive lecture about your performance, that alone, even on a good day, would have been enough to work you up. Pulling the blanket up over your head, you cry out all the feelings that you had been pushing down until you finally got home.  

Suddenly you hear the instrumental tune of Nelly’s “It’s Getting Hot In Here” coming from your cell phone that you had haphazardly tossed on the bedside table next to you. There’s only one person that could be on the other end of the line, the same person who programmed the ringtone himself. Reluctantly you peek your head out of your cocoon and grab your phone.

“Hey, baby! Look, I just got done at the lab with Reid. How bout I pick you up in fifteen minutes and take your cute butt out tonight?” Johnny says, sounding as energetic and happy as ever, something you usually adored about your boyfriend, but right now was making your head hurt.

“Johnny…” You manage to choke out but the rest of the words failing you.

“What’s wrong?” Johnny interjects quickly, his voice now laced with concern.

Sniffling, you try to pull yourself together enough to answer him. “Jus’ had a really bad day.”

Johnny’s heart aches at his girl’s voice sounding so broken. “I’m coming over.”

“Oh Johnny, no, you don’t have to.” You try to stop him, beginning to feel guilty. As much as you want to see him, you don’t want to bring him down with you.

“15 minutes, and I’m there.” He says, ignoring your comment and hanging up the phone.

You don’t even bother moving out of bed since Johnny has a key to your apartment. Just a month ago, you both had given the other the keys to your apartments. It was a big step for you both, but especially for Johnny. He had never been in such a serious relationship; after all, the human torch was previously named playboy of the year… three years in a row. But all that changed when he met you. Of course, he’s still Johnny, sarcastic and charming but the overly flirtatious and irresponsible parts of his old personality were to no use of him now. Not when he’s found someone he cares for more than he ever thought possible.  

You hear the keys jingling and the front door opening as Johnny enters your apartment. “It’s me!” He calls you, but you don’t bother answering. “Babe?” He calls out again as he slips his shoes off at the door and makes his way to your bedroom.

“Hi.” You mutter out when his slim body appears in the door frame.

“Hey...” He says with a soft smile before coming over to sit on the edge of the bed closest to you. He starts soothingly rubbing his hand up and down your leg as he speaks up. “What happened, baby?”

You can’t seem to get yourself to look at him, almost embarrassed of your emotions. “Work stuff, I just-...” You stop taking a deep but shaky breath. “... couldn’t do anything right today.”  

“No, no, no, don’t say that.” Johnny coos moving his hand from your leg to cup your face. He makes you look at him finally, and you wish you would have before because somehow, just his eyes on yours makes your heart feel a little lighter. And even with his eyebrows pinched up in worry and lips in a slight frown, he looks as handsome as ever. “We all have bad days baby, don’t be so hard on yourself. Not on my perfect girl.”

Your eyes well up again, but only this time it is for Johnny’s sweet words. “You’re too good to me, Johnny; I’m sorry I ruined the fun night you wanted to have.” You know Johnny loves you and would do anything for you. But, in times like these, where your emotions are already running high, thoughts of insecurity shuffle their way back into your mind. You imagine what he’d be doing right now if it were for you; he’d probably already be at some extreme sporting thing or even a bar, being the life of the party. But instead, here he is with you, sitting in the dark of your bedroom, trying to console you.

“Hey, where’s all this that coming from, baby? First, you talk shit about my girlfriend, and now you say I’m too good for her?” He says, not being able to hide his teasing grin. “I’ll let you know, I happen to lot her and that she’s the one that’s too good for me. Putting up with all my crazy shit, especially in the beginning, wow, was I a piece of work or what?” Through the tears, you can’t help yourself to start smiling too. “She’s a saint, I swear. But nonetheless, I would gladly choose to be with her anywhere than somewhere without her any day.”  

“You know your job was supposed to be to help me stop crying, right?” You manage a chuckle, the heavyweight of sadness starting to lift off of you little by little.

Johnny chuckles before reaching his hands out for you to take so that you can pull yourself to sit up. “Well, what can I say? I’m not a therapist for a reason.” He says before kissing you softly.

You kiss him back with a small smile. “Well, that’s fine by me. I love you just the way you are.” You assure him, using your hand to run through his short hair.

“I love you too, baby.” He says before kissing you again. “How does take out and movies on the couch sound?”

“Perfect.”

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