Nodding along to what you said to my last ask I agree with all of that.
After sleeping on it, honestly theres so many little moments I keep coming back to, but ultimately one that keeps like. Haunting me so much is the fact that at the end of it all, when Ray leaves and Colin keeps going to look for him, his dads there with him while he looks. Obviously the prior family dinner didnt go well, and I can't exactly blame Colin's mom for having some concerns over his and Ray's relationship since it Is very sudden and very all consuming from her outside perspective and she worries for his safety but like. Colins dad never does. Ultimately he looks at it as "this is my adult sons choice and hes clearly happy in it, thats all I want for him" and idk man its just another one of those things in the Overall theme of the movie solidifying how even if Colin and Ray in particular didnt work out in the end, Colin was in no way wrong or hurting himself for finding fulfillment in being someones submissive, hes allowed to want that and be happy with that role, it just needed to be with someone he could also communicate boundries with and whos willing to negotiate those things with him. Theres more I could/probably will say later but thats the thought for this morning.
SO TRUE TO ALL OF THIS!!!! i definitely understand where colin’s mom was coming from especially with her knowing she would die soon and all, but it doesn’t make what she did right. it sucks that she violated colin’s trust and autonomy and humiliated him in front of his partner—he’s a grown ass man, and this is his own mess to navigate! u know!! her heart was in the right place but the way she went about it was wrong, which is not any kind of unfamiliar experience for queer people. i really loved that too, the difference in how the parents approached the situation. colin’s father knew how to keep his trust and respect his situation regardless of his own feelings about it. i <3 the smith family i really do
colins relationship with his submissiveness was so nice to see too, especially bc it was done in a way that showed us that even tho there were hard times in his arrangement, it did at times empower him and boost his confidence as much as the toxicity of the dynamic wore it back down later. just really wonderful character writing all around i think.
